Baby Boom
Part One
By Carrie Verkman
carebear1025@juno.com

Okay, I got the idea for this story from Cathy Robert's "Misconceptions" where John Carter got pregnant. And one day I was watching an old episode of "The Cosby Show" where all the men got pregnant by drinking water that had like insect spores in it that reproduced or something. So I want to apologize to anyone if I'm stealing their ideas. Obviously I'm not creative enough to come up with my own. I'm also trying to make this seem somewhat scientifically correct. Anyway, I'm saying that this story is a comedy, since we all know that men can't get pregnant. Enjoy!

 

Bubbling Brook Spring Water Bottling Company. Chicago, IL.

Jeffrey Thomas had been working for Bubbling Brook Spring Water for over 20 years. He valued selling clean and refreshing bottled water to the public. "You don't do much in the water business." Jeffrey once told a newspaper reporter. "Clean the water, bottle the water, sell the water, drink the water. No surprises in this field of work."

Then he added, "Knock on wood."

However this superstitious remark didn't prevent the surprises Jeffrey talked about. Soon the company had problems purifying the water. Afraid to lose business, they sold the unfit water anyway. That's when the complaints began. People stopped buying the water due to its filthiness. Bubbling Brook's president, Noah Strausser, came up with a plan to purify the water using a special filter in Lake Michigan to filter the water. Business was back up again. Then the company saw their worst nightmare.

"Mr. President? We need to talk." said Jeffrey Thomas.

"What now?" asked Noah Strausser.

"It's happened again." said Jeffrey. "Look at this." He dropped a copy of The Chicago Tribune on his desk.

"Fifth pregnant male. Tests show pregnancy a result of infected water."

Noah read out loud. "Are you sure it's our water?"

"Yes. The man confirms it."

Noah thought for a moment. "This company has been up for more than 50 years without problems until now. All we have to do is keep doing what we're doing."

"But we'll get slapped with lawsuits the size of Texas!" pleaded Jeffrey.

"I'm willing to risk that."

Jeffrey looked at his boss confused. "There has to be something we can do."

"Send the man a congratulatory basket of baby gifts for this joyous occasion." Noah said sarcastically. "I don't know!"

"What do you know?" asked Jeffrey.

"I know that we can't let this get out to anyone. Try to keep this a secret. It's bad enough The Chicago Tribune knows about it." Noah said. "Until we find a way to stop this, everyone has to keep their mouths shut."

Jeffrey didn't know if he could do that.



County General Hospital. Chicago, IL

"Man, it's like 100 degrees in here!" shouted Dave Malucci. "When is the air conditioning going to get fixed Chief?"

Kerry Weaver let out an exasperated sigh. "I told you, not until next week! Just drink some water!" The heat was affecting everybody. All the doctors and nurses were cranky because of the heat.

"Excuse me, is a Dr. Weaver around?" asked a man.

"WHAT?" Kerry turned around to face a deliveryman.

"I'm sorry to startle you. But I need you to sign for a delivery." he said. "What delivery?"

"Let's see," he said. "A dozen boxes of hypodermic needles, a case of Dopamine, surgical gloves, and a six pack of Bubbling Brook Bottled water."

"Oh yes. I'll sign. I'm sorry for my rudeness, it's the heat."

"Not a problem. Thank you ma'am. Where do you want the stuff?"

Kerry looked around the ER. "I'll take the water. Put everything else on that cart over there." She took the water and put it in the refrigerator in the lounge.

Dave walked into the lounge. He took off his scrub top. It was soaked with sweat. As Dave put on another one, John Carter and Abby Lockhart came into the lounge. Abby was fanning herself with a little electronic fan. John waved a chart in front of him. "Is the heat getting to you Dave?" asked John.

"Hell yeah, this is my third scrub top today." He reached into the fridge. "Hey Carter, you want a bottle of water?"

"Yeah." Dave tossed him one and took one for himself. "What about you Abby?"

"No thanks, I'm fine."

"Okay, but I hope you don't die from the heat." Dave took a sip of the water. "Yuck, this tastes funny."

John took a sip of his. "It does taste different. But water is water."



Luka Kovac took out a handkerchief and wiped the sweat off his forehead. He sighed as he moved on to his next patient. Deb Chen noticed he was tired. "Dr. Kovac, why don't you take a break. You look like hell."

"I'm fine Dr. Chen."

"No you're not. Here." She handed him a bottle of water. "I'll take this patient."

Luka swallowed the water as if it were liquid gold. "Thanks. I needed that."

Mark Greene walked into the lounge with Elizabeth Corday. "So did the GSW patient come out of surgery okay?"

"Yes, but he is in critical condition. He's in the I. C .U. now." answered Elizabeth.

"Okay. Man, I'm dying of thirst." Mark grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge. "You want some water Elizabeth?" He handed her a bottle.

"No thanks. I brought my own. I freeze it overnight." She pulled out a frozen bottle from the freezer. Mark took a sip of his. He noticed a funny taste. Mark checked the expiration date on the bottle. Shrugging his shoulders, he continued to drink.



Bubbling Brook Spring Water Bottling Company

Jeffrey Thomas was in a very difficult position. He was dying to tell someone about the company's water. Doing so would risk him losing his job. Noah also asked him to find information about the water filter that they bought. It wasn't easy, but Jeffrey found results.

"There is a pharmaceutical company that has been experimenting with gene research. That includes human reproduction also. They have been experimenting with male sperm and female eggs. From what I've heard the company is also using radiation to speed up the gestation process of the fetuses they are creating. They want to see if gestation periods in pregnant females will speed up." Jeffrey explained.

"That still doesn't explain why my water is getting men pregnant." Noah said.

"Let me finish." Jeffrey continued. "The company recently lost funding from the government to continue the experiments. So they have been dumping the fertilized eggs and chemicals they used into Lake Michigan. I studied the filter we bought. It isn't keeping all the bad stuff out of the water. I asked a biologist to examine the water. It turns out the fertilized eggs are clinging on to spores in the water. The filter isn't keeping out the spores, therefore the water contains fertilized eggs."

"But how do these spores, or eggs, or whatever reproduce?" asked Noah.

"Once the infected water comes in contact with a human body, or a host, it will reproduce in the body just a pregnant woman's body would do." said Jeffrey.

Noah thought about the information Jeffrey just presented to him. "How come it isn't happening to women?"

"Apparently no women have been drinking the water."

Noah soon came up with a plan. "We need to stop the shipments of water. Everywhere. Get me a list of where the water has been shipped. From now on we don't package the water for shipping. Let's try to stop this before things get worse."

End of Chapter One