Homeless Once More, Part Eighteen
By Cathy Roberts
glroberts@bigfoot.com
A John Carter story, rated M15.

"ER" and all its characters belong to Warner Bros. No
infringement of their copyright is intended. This story
was written for the enjoyment of "ER" fans everywhere, and
may be downloaded for your own pleasure. However this
story may not be used, distributed or archived without the
permission of the author.

The last episode seen was "Point of Origin".

A big thank you to Melissa, my editor who tries her best to
keep me in line.



As they set out for Atlanta, John carefully studied the road
map. He figured that he could handle riding all the way
through Virginia and into North Carolina. He mentioned that
they might want to detour off the Interstate and go to the
Cherokee reservation, where his relatives lived. Maggie was
surprised to hear that he had relatives that weren't Carters.
She had assumed that those were his only family. John had
laughed, then recited a long list of cousin's on his mother's
side: Jeffrey, Rob, Jodie, Sarah, Barry, David, Margaret,
Susan, and Keith. He further explained that his mother was
a half-Cherokee who had grown up in North Carolina. Looking
at the map, Maggie had agreed to try to drive to Cherokee
in one day, but she wouldn't guarantee it. In the end, John
had been so insistent upon getting there that night that she
did drive straight there. He was very eager to see his
family and his enthusiasm was contagious. She found herself
wanting very much to meet the rest of his family - maybe this
side was closer to normal than the Carter side. She could
at least hope so. Once in town, John directed her to his
grandfather's house. He explained to her that his grandmother
had died the same year that his brother had died, but that
his grandfather had remarried when John was eighteen. Some
of his cousins lived with his grandfather, but Maggie didn't
catch their names. She was too busy trying to see the
scenery of the Smokey Mountains. It was dark, but the
headlights showed her a little of the mountains. She couldn't
wait to wake up in the morning and see the sights out here.

"Do you know of any decent hotels around here?" she asked as
she navigated her BMW up a dirt road.

"There are lots of them back in Cherokee. But, we won't be
staying in a hotel tonight. Grandfather won't allow that.
We'll be staying with him."

"John, it's getting late. He won't be expecting company."

John grinned, "He won't mind. Trust me on this. He'll be
glad to see us and he'll insist that we stay with him."

The car cleared the tree-lined road and emerged in a clearing.
Ahead of her was a small lake and to the left of the lake was
a brightly lit, two-story farmhouse. A tendril of smoke was
escaping from the chimney and she could hear dogs barking at
them as she parked along side the other cars. When Maggie
got out of the car, the smell of burning wood assaulted her
senses, but it wasn't an altogether unpleasant smell. This
wood smelled sweet. The front door opened, spilling light
out onto the covered porch and she could see a tall man
silhouetted in the doorway.

"John Truman Carter. It's been a long time. Come inside
out of the cold."

The man's voice sounded friendly enough, but not old. Maggie
thought that it must be one of John's uncles or cousins. She
was surprised when they reached the doorway and she found
herself face to face with a white-haired man, the lines on
his face attesting to his character. He warmly smiled at
her - the same smile that she had often seen on John's face.

"This must be Maggie Doyle," the old man said.

"Yes, sir. Let me introduce you. Grandfather, this is Maggie
Doyle. Maggie, this is my grandfather, John Adair."

"Welcome to my home, Maggie Doyle. Are you hungry?"

"We haven't had anything to eat yet," John told him.

John Adair smiled, then shut the door and walked out of the room.

"C'mon." John took Maggie by the elbow and they followed his
grandfather. They found the man again in the kitchen of the
house. It was a big room, centered by a large table smack dab
in the center. An older woman was at the counter, preparing
something for them to eat.

The woman smiled at Maggie, "I hope you don't mind leftovers."

"No. Leftovers are fine. But, I don't eat meat."

"Ah, I'm glad you told me that before I put any venison on your
plate then. By the way, I'm Allie Adair, John's wife."

"Sorry, Grandma. This is Maggie Doyle."

"Jenny phoned us and mentioned that you might be dropping by
on your way to Atlanta."

John nodded, "We were in Washington for a few days and started
our trip south today." He slowly sat down at the table.

"You are in pain, Johnny. Don't you have something that you
can take?" John Adair asked.

"I'm fine," John said at the same time that Maggie replied,
"I have it for him."

The two men looked at each other for a few moments, then John
turned to Maggie. "I guess I should take something." While
she got his medicine for him, he asked his grandparents, "Where
is everyone?"

"In town," Allie replied. "Your Uncle has his hands full with
three stores now, so everyone helps out. These days the
tourists are crazy about anything Native American, so business
is brisk."

"Good. I hear that the new casino is really making a lot of
money."

"It has been good in that respect for the tribe. I don't know
if it is good for our people as a whole. It's one thing to
get the white man's money by honestly selling them what they
want. I don't particularly like the gambling."

Allie retrieved the plates from the microwave and sat them
down on the table. "What would you like to drink?"

"Juice if you have any." Maggie said.

Allied nodded, then went to get it. She already knew that
John would want her iced tea. She got their beverages, then
sat beside her husband at the table while the two ate.

"There is a Pow-wow scheduled for tomorrow night. You should
stay long enough to see it," John Adair told them.

"That would be nice. I've never seen one before. Being Irish
Catholic, I'm afraid that I don't know too much about Native
American culture."

"Then you'll find it to be very enjoyable. So, you'll stay
here tomorrow night as well?" He asked, looking directly at
John for the answer. Maggie began to sense that John's
grandfather had something else on his mind besides having her
enjoy a Cherokee event.

John nodded, "We can stay." He suddenly yawned. "I'm sorry.
That pain medication makes me tired."

"Riding in a car all day will do that to you as well, John,"
Maggie said.

"I'll get your bags while you finish eating. Are the two of
you sharing a room?" John Adair asked. There was no judgement
of any kind in his voice.

"No, sir. We aren't," John answered, kicking himself when the
blush came anyway.

Maggie knew he was remembering the incident from yesterday
morning, so she decided to get him totally off the hook.
"I'm a lesbian."

The two Adair's looked at her, but not in shock or revulsion.
All that she saw on their faces was simple acceptance.

"You should introduce her to Susan," John Adair said as he
stood. "I think they'll get along well together, don't you?"

His wife nodded, "You both are very outspoken young women,"
she explained to Maggie.

"May I have your keys?" John Adair held out his hand and
Maggie gave him the keys to the car, then he was gone.

"If you're both done, then I'll show you where you'll be
sleeping tonight. John, you know which room to take." They
followed her upstairs. She put Maggie into the room next to
the one that John usually used. It was becoming very apparent
that John would not be on his feet for much longer, so the two
women put him to bed. He was asleep the minute his head hit
the pillow.

They went back into the hallway, where a tall and very handsome
young man was standing with their suitcases in his hands. He
smiled at Maggie and again, she recognized the smile. This
had to be one of John's cousins.

"Maggie Doyle, this is Keith. Keith, this is Maggie Doyle.
She works with John at the hospital in Chicago. Jenny never
said if you were a doctor or a nurse."

"I'm a doctor."

"Pleased to meet you, Doctor Maggie Doyle. Grandma, which
room did you put her in? This suitcase is getting' a little
bit heavy."

"I can take it." Maggie reached out for her bag, but he
pulled back.

"I brought it this far, ma'am. I will take it to your room."

"Put it in there," Allie pointed him in the direction of
Maggie's room. "Let me have John's suitcase. He's asleep
and I don't want you going into his room and bothering him
just because you want to make sure he's alright."

"Well, if I can't talk to him, how else am I gonna see that
for myself?"

"You can take my word for it that he's fine." Allie took
John's suitcase from him and disappeared into John's room
while Keith took Maggie's suitcase into hers. Then the three
of them went back downstairs.

"Everyone else should be home soon," Keith mentioned as he
lowered himself to the floor in front of the fireplace in the
living room.

"By everyone, he means his father Judd and his sister Margaret.
They live with us. Think that they're keeping us company or
some such drivel as that. Truth is, since Judd's wife up and
left him, he's the one who's needed the looking after," John
Adair said. He was settled in a recliner.

"Grandfather! You aren't supposed to know why we live here,"
Keith laughed.

"It's hard to not know about what's going on under my own
roof," the older man smiled.

"So, are you also an Adair?" Maggie asked. She hoped she
didn't embarrass herself by getting anyone's names mixed up
while she stayed here.

"Yes, ma'am. John's momma is a sister to my Daddy," Keith
said. "But, don't go around thinking that everyone named
Adair is a relative. Adair is a fairly common name amongst
the Cherokee."

"And the non-Cherokee," Allie said as she returned to the room.
Maggie hadn't even realized that the woman had not come into
the living room with them. Then she remembered the supper
dishes and felt guilty that she had not offered to help wash up.

"Adair is my wife's maiden name," John Adair explained.

It was then that Maggie noticed that Allie Adair was not
Cherokee, but white. Before she could say anything at all
though, Keith opened his mouth as if he was going to say
something, but John Adair cut him off with a sharp glance.

"Not yet, Keith."

"Yes, sir."

"I think tonight would be a good night for some popcorn,"
Allie said.

"I'll go get it ready." Keith got to his feet and disappeared
in the direction of the kitchen. Maggie ended up telling the
Adair's about her and John's trip so far and all they had seen.
While she was talking, the front door opened and an older
version of Keith entered the house with a young woman. They
had to be John's Uncle Judd and his cousin Margaret. Judd
Adair reminded Maggie very much of Jenny Carter, not too
surprising since they were brother and sister. Allie whispered
to her that Judd and Jenny were twins, then she introduced
Maggie to them.

"So where's Johnny?" Judd asked.

"He's asleep upstairs. He was exhausted and in a lot of pain,
so he took some medicine and went to bed early. You'll have
your chance to see him in the morning. They won't be leaving
until the day after tomorrow anyway," John Adair said.

This seemed to satisfy Judd and he sat down on the couch.
Margaret smiled warmly at Maggie, then sat down on the floor
in the spot that Keith had vacated.

Keith returned to the living room and began to prepare the
popcorn in the fireplace. He looked over to his grandfather.
"Now?"

"Now."

Keith craned his head around to look at Maggie. "Aunt Jenny
told us that you were there when John was shot. What happened?"

Maggie didn't know what to say. For one thing, she had no
idea how much this branch of John's family knew about John's
depression and hospitalizations. Obviously, they were
concerned about him - she could see that much on each of their
faces. But, she didn't want to just blurt out that he was
trying to kill himself that day on the roof. She didn't want
to upset them or him.

"I'm sorry, but I just don't feel comfortable talking about
him like that."

"We understand, Maggie. Keith is just very concerned about
his cousin. Outside of Chase Carter, Keith is the closest
family member to John. They're the same age, minus a week."
John Adair explained.

Keith got to his feet, "Grandfather, you might understand,
but I sure don't. I want to know why my cousin wanted to
kill himself. I want to know that he's not going to try
something like that again."

Before John Adair could reply, Maggie spoke up. "Keith, I
can sympathize with your concerns. I also want to know that
he's not going to do something like that again. We all do.
I just can't answer your questions though. It would be as
if I were betraying John's confidence. Ask him tomorrow and
if he says that it's okay for me to tell you, then I will.
But, please don't ask me to talk about him behind his back."

John Adair nodded at her, a slight smile on his face. It was
obvious that he approved of her stand. Keith wasn't as
inclined to accept her answer.

"I'm going to bed," he growled as he headed for the stairs.

"Don't you dare bother John. I mean it, son." Judd spoke
up. He had been silent ever since he had greeted Maggie,
but Keith paused long enough to acknowledge the fact he had
heard his father, then he went on up to his room. At least
Maggie assumed he went to his room.

Feeling tired from all the driving she had done that day,
Maggie excused herself and went to bed as well. As she
returned to her room after brushing her teeth and washing her
face, she went into John's room to check on him. Not that
she needed to worry. Keith had taken a seat on an old trunk
and was watching his cousin.

"I didn't wake him up," he defiantly whispered.

"I can see that. Physically, he's going to be all right,
Keith. He's recovering very well from the gun shot wounds."

"I'm not that worried about his body. It's his spirit that
needs to be healed. Grandfather has something in mind, but
I'm not sure what it is. I just hope it works."

"Me, too. Although, I do think that he's well on his way to
healing his spirit as well. I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night. Oh, Maggie?"

She paused at the door, "Yeah?"

"Thanks for being his friend."

She smiled, "It's been my pleasure, Keith."

Maggie went into her room and quickly fell asleep in the huge
and comfy bed.

"Maggie? Maggie?"

Maggie could hear the urgent whisper, but she didn't want to
open her eyes. "Go 'way."

"Wake up, Maggie. Come on."

Maggie slowly opened her eyes and saw that John was seated on
the side of her bed. He was fully dressed. She grabbed her
watch from the nightstand.

"John, it's five in the morning. Go back to bed."

"Maggie, get dressed. There's something I want to show you."

"It can wait until later. Much later. Noon sounds good to
me right now." She pulled the covers up over her head.

"It can't wait, Maggie. If you don't get up now, then you
might miss it. I brought you some coffee."

She stuck her out from under the blankets. "Coffee? Where?"

"Here." He was holding a steaming cup of coffee in his hands.
She sat up in bed, took the cup from him and took a long drink
of it.

"Thanks."

He grinned, "My pleasure. Now, hurry up and get dressed. Do
you think you can remember your way to the kitchen?"

"Definitely."

"Good. Meet me there in five minutes. Dress warmly."

Before she could ask him any questions, he was out the door.
She sighed, then got out of bed, shivering slightly in the
cold room. She dressed quickly, then headed downstairs, coffee
cup in hand. When she reached the kitchen, she saw that John
was not alone. Keith and Margaret were seated at the table
with him.

John grinned broadly when he saw her enter the room. "Let's
go."

"Go? You want to drag me outside at this time of the morning?
John, it's cold out there."

"Maggie, you're acting like you weren't born and raised in
Chicago. Put this coat on and let's go or we'll miss it."

Maggie put on the coat and followed the three of them out
the door. Dogs, all eager to be petted, emerged from the
mist-shrouded woods and immediately surrounded them. With
the canines in tow, the three started to walk into the woods
behind the house and Maggie had no choice but to follow them.
She vaguely realized that they were walking uphill and she
hoped that John was not going to over exert himself this
early in the morning. She kept her eyes on the ground as
she walked, not wanting to trip over any roots - or a dog.
She didn't know they had stopped until she bumped into
Margaret, who reached out a hand to steady her.

"We're here. Watch your step now." Maggie followed Margaret
through some bushes, then gasped as she reached the edge of
a boulder and saw the lake and the house spread out below her.
She had not realized how high up they had gone. The others
sat down on the boulder and she did the same, finally giving
in to the attentions of the dogs. Soon though, the dogs
tired of licking her face and they settled down around the humans.

"This is pretty, John, but I think you could have brought me
up here later to see this."

John and his cousins grinned and Maggie felt as if she were
an outsider.

"Look up at the sky, Maggie." Keith said.

Maggie looked up, seeing that the night sky was gradually
turning pink. Then she knew that they had brought her to this
place so that she could watch the sunrise.

"I keep having this debate with myself about which sunrise is
more breathtaking - the one over the ocean or the one you can
see from here." John said, his eyes fixed at some point in
the east.

"Yeah. Shame you almost missed this one, cousin," Keith
softly said.

John nodded, "Yeah. But, then again, I've never seen a
sunrise from the other side." He then looked over to his
cousin and grinned. "It was a joke, Keith."

"I don't find it very funny, Johnny. Not one bit," Keith
frowned.

The two men stared at each other for a few moments and Maggie
realized that she wasn't the only one holding her breath
during that time. When John broke off eye contact with Keith
and looked back up at the sky, she heard Margaret take a deep
breath. Maggie could feel a lot of tension coming from Keith,
but none at all from John. It was as if he had accepted what
had happened to him and then moved past it. Finally.

The four of them, plus the dogs, sat on the rock for quite a
while, watching the sky change color and then the sun was
there, breaking through the mist that veiled the mountain.
The lake caught the sun and reflected it back upward, bathing
the entire area with light. It was a truly breathtaking sight
and Maggie was glad that John had hauled her out of bed to see
this.

"If you think this was pretty, you should see a moonrise from
up here," John told her as she helped him to his feet.

"I don't think we're here at the right time of the month to
see a moonrise," she replied.

They headed back down the mountain, Keith and Margaret slightly
ahead of them. Maggie hoped they wouldn't get too far ahead.
She could tell that John was beginning to hurt and was a
little tired from the hike up the mountain.

"You okay?" she asked.

He nodded, "I'm fine. The rest helped some. I'll go back to
bed when we get back to the house."

"Okay. It's really beautiful up here."

"This land has been in my family for - well, for a long time.
Since before the Cherokee were rounded up and made to leave.
You probably read about the "Trail of Tears" in school."

"Yeah. I vaguely remember it. I don't remember reading about
the fact that not all of the Cherokee went though."

"They hid out in the mountains. Then, after the soldiers
had been gone for a while, they came out of hiding and moved
back onto their farms. For a long time, the government
refused to even acknowledge the fact that there were Cherokee
still in this area. They only recognized the Western Cherokee,
those on the Oklahoma reservation. It took a long time, but
the Eastern Cherokee finally won recognition as a reservation
tribe. The big difference is that the Cherokee Reservation
here in North Carolina is on land that was owned by the Cherokee.
This farm had been in the Adair family for a long time. My
grandmother inherited land as well. It's not that far from
here. When she died, she left it to Mom, who was her only
daughter. That land has a history of being passed down
through the women of the family."

"I thought that Native Americans didn't really believe in
land ownership. Wasn't that one of the main reasons there
was conflict with the white settlers?"

"It was. But, we learned about the importance of a deed
from the white man. This is legally our land and they can
never, ever take it away from us."

Maggie didn't know what to say to that, especially since she
was in the "they" category. She had never heard John talk in
an "us" versus "them" fashion before and it sounded odd to
hear that now. Back in Chicago, he had never spoken openly
about his Cherokee heritage. Now, in North Carolina, it
seemed as if it was all he had.

"Would you mind if we rested for a little bit?" John asked.
He wasn't feeling too well at the moment. He was dizzy and
his abdomen hurt. He hoped that sitting down for a few minutes
would at least make the dizziness go away.

"Sure."

As John sat down on a fallen log, Maggie looked down the
trail and saw that Margaret and Keith were still headed down
the mountain.

"Should I call them back?"

"No. I'll be all right in a few minutes. I was just
feeling a little light-headed. Besides, Keith's angry with
me."

"He doesn't understand why you wanted to kill yourself and
he's worried that you'll try again."

"I won't."

"He doesn't necessarily believe that. You scared him. You
scared a lot of people, John."

He winked at her, "Sorry. I really am sorry. So, did he give
you the third degree last night?"

"He tried. I didn't tell them anything. It just didn't feel
right to talk about you while you were asleep. Besides, I have
no idea how much they know about everything that's happened to
you. I told them that if they wanted to know, they should ask
you. If you wanted me to tell them, you would say so then.
Your grandfather liked that answer."

John grinned, "He would. He thinks that a person's thoughts
are private and should remain that way."

"You really love him, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do. It's just a shame that I don't get to see him as
much as I have to see my other grandfather. I know that my
Grandfather Carter cares about me, but he's not an easy man to
get along with. Not like my Grandfather Adair."

"I could tell that you loved him. When you say "grandfather"
and you're referring to him, your voice is warm. It's not
like that when you say it in reference to your other grandfather.
We have company."

John looked up to see that Keith was walking toward them.
Margaret must have kept going, because she wasn't anywhere
in sight.

"So, do you plan to sit up here all day?"

"I don't have any other plans for the day. We're on vacation."
John smiled.

"Vacation? John, we were suspended."

"It still resulted in a vacation, didn't it?"

"Are you okay? I can bring one of the horses back up here
for you."

John's eyes lit up at that, but Maggie firmly put her foot
down on that idea. "There is no way that you are going to
get on a horse, John."

"Maggie, I can handle a horse," he argued.

"Maybe so, but I'm not so sure that your body can handle you
on a horse. In case you've forgotten, you are still recovering
from abdominal surgery. Benton had to cut through muscle
during surgery and you don't need to be doing anything strenuous.
Especially the type of stretching required for getting on a
horse."

John shrugged, "Thanks for the offer, Keith, but my personal
physician won't let me near a horse. I'll be fine in a few
more minutes."

"I can always carry him down the mountain," Keith said to Maggie.

"That might work," Maggie agreed.

"No way. Nuh uh. Forget it. I'll sit here all day if I have
to, but no one is carrying me down the mountain."

Keith and Maggie grinned at John's vehement protests. "We
were only kidding around, cousin."

John slowly got to his feet. "I think we can continue now."

Maggie rolled her eyes as she recognized his stubborn streak.
He probably didn't feel up to walking, but was going to do it
anyway. With a sigh, she followed the two men down the
mountain. It didn't take long for her to realize that Keith
was walking slowly which meant that John had to walk slowly
in order to keep pace with him. She smiled at that, glad to
see that John had some family that truly cared about his
welfare. Then she mentally kicked herself for thinking that.
After he had been shot, his extended Carter family had been
at the hospital just about every day, even when they couldn't
see him. It was just that the way the two family's showed
their caring was so strikingly different.

By the time the trio reached the house, John was asking Maggie
if he could have some of his pain medication. All he wanted
to do was to take the pill and go back to bed. Still, seeing
the look on Maggie's face when she had seen the actual sunrise
had been well worth the physical exertion. He found himself
hoping that someday he could take Kerry up the mountain. But,
it was just wishful thinking on his part. He knew that Kerry
only thought of him as a friend and nothing more. He was the
one who had the leanings in the direction of a romance with her.

After saying good morning to his grandparents, John went on
upstairs to his room. Maggie went to her room to get his
medicine, making a side trip to the bathroom to get a glass
of water for him. When she reached his room, she found Keith
in there with him.

Keith was insisting on helping John get undressed and into bed
and John was having none of it. Maggie could tell by the
panicked look in his eyes that he was close to losing it and
she quickly shoved Keith out of the room, firmly closing the
door behind him. She would find some way to explain things
to him later.

John slumped down onto the bed. "Thanks." His voice was shaky,
as were his hands.

"No problem. He's going to wonder why you were acting like
that, though." She handed him the pill and the water, watching
as he swallowed the pill down, then emptied the glass.

"I know. Maggie, I've been thinking about things. About
everything. You can go on and tell them what they want to
know." He stood, then pulled back the covers and began to
take off his shirt.

"Everything?" she asked.

He nodded, "Yeah. Except for what I told you the other morning."

"I'll answer their questions then."

"Thanks." John stepped out of his pants and crawled into bed,
pulling the covers up and snuggling down. Being here like
this reminded him of his childhood, when his family would
come down for frequent visits. He and Bobby always had to
share this bed. Those were good times, but they ended when
Bobby was diagnosed with leukemia. Over the years, John was
not able to get back here as much as he would have liked. He
had forgotten how peaceful it was on his grandfather's farm.
Thinking about that helped to take his mind off of his pain
and he drifted off to sleep.



Maggie softly shut John's door, finding herself face to face
with Keith.

"What's wrong with him?" he asked.

"Come on downstairs and I'll tell you. John gave me the okay
to answer all of your questions. You're not going to like the
answers though, I can tell you that right now."

Maggie headed down to the kitchen, Keith right behind her.
When she arrived there, she discovered that more of John's
relatives had arrived for breakfast. She was quickly introduced
to more of his cousins, aunts and uncles, including the cousin
named Susan, who Allie thought she was like. As they ate
breakfast, Maggie answered their questions, telling them all
about Dan Litvak and his obsessive interest in John, about
the night that John dislocated his shoulder, about the
attempted sexual assault and all the Hell that John had been
going through since then. She told them what she witnessed
on the roof after picking John up from the side of the road
on Christmas Day. She even told them about his second
suicide attempt while in the hospital. She told them all
she knew, but nothing about what John had confided to her
about the assault. What his family heard was bad enough.

"No wonder he was getting upset with me," Keith muttered.
He knew that there was no way he could ever understand what
his cousin was feeling, but he knew that he hated the fact
that John was hurting inside.

Everyone agreed to not mention any of this to John unless
John brought the subject up himself. Then everyone scattered
to their various jobs, leaving Maggie alone with Allie and
John Adair. By noon, John was awake and downstairs, ravenous
since he had missed breakfast. Allie prepared a huge lunch
for the four of them and afterward, John and Maggie helped her
clean up.

John Adair came back into the kitchen, his coat and hat on and
holding John's coat. "Let's go for a short walk."

"Sure." John caught the warning look that Maggie was giving
him. "Maggie, it will be a very short walk. Believe me."

"I'll see to it that he doesn't overdo it, Maggie. Besides,"
John Adair grinned, "I'm too old to be gallivanting all over
the mountain."

The two men left the house and walked to the field where the
horses were grazing.

"I've always loved this place." John smiled as he leaned
against the fence.

"I know. I wish you could have spent more time here. After
Bobby died and your father decided to go to Europe, I asked him
and Jenny to consider sending you and Barb down to us to live.
Apparently, your father didn't think too much of that idea.
Either that, or his father wanted the two of you in a boarding
school. Jenny never was very clear on that."

"It had to have been Dad. He wouldn't have sent us to boarding
school if that was what Grandfather had wanted." One of the
horses came over to the fence and John reached out to stroke
its neck. "Did you know about Mom?"

"About her suicide attempts?" John Adair shook his head. "Not
until Roland finally broke down and called us because he didn't
know what else to do for her. That's when Alethia insisted
that Jenny come home. I believe that different places have
the capability of bestowing healing upon the wounded spirit,
John. The ocean. The mountains. It's not just an Indian
thing, either, or the fact that a person's family might have
a connection to a particular area. I feel that all of us are
connected to the earth and that there are certain places where
we can isolate that connection and allow healing to take place.
The earth gives us life - that's an old saying, but one I
believe in."

"I've felt better ever since I left Chicago."

"That's because you were putting a lot of bad things behind
you when you left. Still, I'm sure that you can't wait to get
back, can you?"

John grinned, "No, sir. I can't. It's my home. It's where
I belong, I guess."

"Only if you want it to be that way. A person can make anyplace
their home, John. Home is more than just the physical location,
it's so much more involved than that."

"I wish I could believe that as strongly as you do, Grandfather."

"Maybe when you reach my age, you will."

"Yeah. Maybe."

They were both silent for a long time, watching the horses at
play in the meadow.

"We should go back in. I don't want the women taking me to
task for keeping you out in the cold for too long."

"Maggie can be pretty forceful at times."

"She's a good friend, John."

"She certainly is. I'm glad that she decided to come with me
on this trip."

They walked back to the house, neither one needing to talk.
Just as they were about to go inside, John Adair smiled at his
grandson and said, "I'm glad you decided to live."

"Thanks, but it wasn't all my decision. Sometimes, you just
can't ignore what God is telling you."

The old man nodded, not sure how to take that last sentence.
He somehow suspected that John's sentiments were less than
religious. They went into the house to see if Allie needed
help preparing the food she was taking to the Pow-wow scheduled
for that evening. John found himself looking forward to
attending the event and knew that Maggie would have a good
time there as well. It seemed to him that she was getting
along well with his family, but he found himself once again
wishing that Kerry Weaver was also with them. He wondered how
she would react to his huge extended family. Considering how
much she loved the culture of Africa, he had a feeling that
she wouldn't have any trouble appreciating the culture of the
Cherokee. Maybe someday, if he was good enough, he might
just find out.