The Man Who Held Her Heart, Part 3
By Cathy Roberts
glroberts@bigfoot.com
A John Carter story, rated PG15

Last episode seen was "Getting To Know You".

"ER" and all its characters belong to Warner Bros. No
infringement of their copyright is intended. This story
was written for the enjoyment of "ER" fans everywhere, and
may be downloaded for your own pleasure. However this story
may not be used, distributed or archived without the
permission of the author.

I would like to take the opportunity to send a big thank you
to Melissa who edits my ramblings, and to Amanda, who
encouraged me to write a sequel to this story.



When Anna accompanied Millicent Carter back to the ICU, she
could feel anger and tension emanating from the woman. But,
none of it showed on her face. How unlike the grandson, Anna
thought, Carter had a difficult time hiding his emotions.

As they approached the doors to the unit, Anna could see that
Robert Carter was inside sitting by John's bedside. One of the
nurses stopped by his side and spoke to him, and he shook his
head at her. Anna could see that he was holding John's hand
with both of his own. Maybe the man wasn't as heartless as she
had thought. The nurse pointed at them and Robert Carter
turned his head to look at them. Then he slowly got up and
came out into the hallway. Anna was surprised to see tears
glittering in his eyes.

"Are you ready to leave, my dear?" he asked his wife.

Millicent nodded, then turned to Anna. "Thank you for all of
your help, Doctor Del Amico."

"John's my friend, Mrs. Carter, there's no need for you to
thank me for being his friend."

Millicent nodded, then headed for the elevator. Robert Carter
cast a quick look in Anna's direction, then followed his wife.
Anna went into the ICU and settled into the chair that Robert
Carter had so recently vacated. Taking John's hand into her
own, she noticed that he was once more sleeping peacefully. He
had been given his pain medication, she didn't need to check
his chart to know that much. Her heart ached for him and she
wanted nothing more than to be able to look into his eyes and
once more see his love for her in them. She wondered if she
would ever see that again.



Alone in the elevator, Millicent gazed intently at her husband,
who for his part, wouldn't look at her at all.

"I spoke with Doctor Corday."

"Did you?"

"She told me about the phone conversation she had with you and
Roland. Did you reach Roland?"

"I did. I gave him your message, dear." He kept his eyes on
the display above the elevator door.

"If John takes a turn for the worse, then I will never forgive
you nor Roland for this."

"What was I supposed to do, Millicent? Get into an argument
with my son while Doctor Corday was still on the telephone with
us? I refuse to air our family's problems in front of strangers."

"You could have assured her that we would be on the next
flight to Chicago, Robert. That's what you should have done.
Then, after the conversation had ended, you should have gone
to Roland and reminded him that he had a son who needed him
very much right now. You never hesitate to remind the children
about their familial obligations regarding the business, yet
you refuse to remind them about their obligations to their own
children. I've lost two grandsons in my lifetime, Robert, and
I refuse to lose another."

The elevator came to a stop at the ground floor and when the
doors opened, Robert stepped out. Millicent did not.

"Aren't you coming home with me?" he asked.

"I'm staying here with John. I'll call if I need a ride home.
As soon as Roland lands, have him come here." And on that note,
the doors closed. Millicent then pressed the button for the
administrative floor, hoping to have a chance to speak with the
Chief of Staff. She thought they could discuss making arrangements
to have the cards and gifts taken to the house until John was
well enough to have them. After that, she would go back to the
ICU to sit with John. He needed to have someone from his
family with him.



The next morning, Peter was looking over Carter's chart when
Roland and Laura Carter finally arrived. Millicent Carter was
seated by Carter's side and she was the one who noticed their
arrival.

"Well, it's about time. Excuse me, Doctor Benton," she got up
and walked out to them.

Peter watched them through the glass, noticing that Carter took
after his mother in looks. Laura Carter wasn't a tall woman;
she was small and petite, with dark hair, and from what he could
see from inside the ICU, dark eyes as well. Roland Carter was
tall; obviously Carter had inherited his height from the man.
He was blonde and tanned. Both of them were tanned. For a
brief moment, Peter regretted that he had not gone to the
cocktail party that Roland Carter had thrown in honor of
Carter's graduation from medical school. It would have given
him a chance to meet Carter's parents and the rest of his
family. Of course, back then, he had no idea that Carter would
continue to be his student. Back then, he had been too busy
feeling sorry for himself over his failed relationship with
Jeannie Boulet and dealing with the very real worry that he
might have contracted the HIV virus from her. His fears over
that were continuing to prove groundless and he no longer
mourned the death of that relationship. He had moved on and
now had a child of his own. There was still no woman in his
life, but he did have his son, and Reese meant the world to him.
He had always thought that parents felt that way about their
children. His mother had certainly doted on him. Looking out
into the hallway and seeing the unrepentant looks on the faces
of Carter's parents, he could tell that Carter had never been
doted on; at least not by his own parents.

He put Carter's chart in the slot at the foot of the bed, then
headed out into the hallway. If Mrs. Carter had been in the
middle of berating her son and daughter-in-law, she stopped the
minute he entered the hallway.

"This is Doctor Peter Benton, he was one of the surgeons who
saved John's life. He can answer any medical questions you
might have," Millicent introduced him. "This is my son, Roland,
and his wife Laura."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Doctor Benton. John has always
had good things to say about you," Roland Carter held out his
hand and Peter found himself having to shake hands with the man.

"How is John doing?" Laura asked.

"Much better. I think we'll be able to move him into a regular
room within the next couple of days. Why don't you two go on in
and see John, and then we can go into the waiting room. I think
you'll be more comfortable there while I explain his condition."

"We can go there now," Laura said. "I'd like to know how he's
doing."

Roland nodded. "I agree with Laura. I'd like to know more
about his condition first. Father made things sound rather
serious on the telephone."

"The waiting room is this way," Peter headed down the hallway,
trying his best to push his opinions aside. It wasn't his job
to agree or disagree with what the parents of a patient did or
how they reacted. Even if that patient was John Carter.

They all sat down, with Laura and Roland taking the small couch
and Peter and Millicent sitting in nearby chairs.

"Well, first of all, John is finally out of danger. He sustained
some very serious injuries in the accident. As a result, he
lost his spleen and his left kidney. He had a lot of internal
bleeding and we struggled to get him through surgery alive. He
has a lot of fractures and will be facing many hours of physical
therapy before he gets back on his feet. He developed an
infection after the surgery and since his remaining kidney had
also been badly damaged in the accident, we felt it was best to
put him on dialysis until the infection was successfully treated."

"Will John have to remain on dialysis?" Roland asked with a frown.

Peter shook his head. "No, he won't. As I said, we put him on
dialysis in order to protect his remaining kidney. Without his
spleen, John will be more susceptible to infections. Doctor
Miller makes regular visits and can also update you on John's
condition."

"Father mentioned something about having Ronald take a look at
John," Roland said.

"John's not in danger of dying now, right?" Laura impatiently
asked.

"He's getting stronger every day, Mrs. Carter. He has a long
recovery ahead of him, but in my opinion, he is out of danger."

Laura Carter closed her eyes, then nodded. "I'd like to see
him now."

"Of course."

They headed back down the hallway to the ICU.

"I'll wait out here in case you have any questions about his
condition or his care." Peter held the door open for them,
then watched as they approached their son.

"Don't judge Laura too harshly, Doctor Benton," Millicent said
as she too peered through the glass. "When Bobby died, it hit
her hard. I don't think she's ever fully recovered from losing
him. She couldn't see John until she knew that he was going to
live."

"She didn't hesitate to stay away when he needed her most."
Even as the words left his lips, Peter knew he had made a
mistake in letting his feelings show.

"It wasn't her choice. Roland, like his father, didn't tell
the rest of us the entire story. We were under the impression
that John had been in an accident and sustained minor injuries.
For some reason, the men in my life seem to think they have to
spare the women in our family as much pain as possible. Roland
would have told Laura the truth once it was clear that John was
out of danger and would live."

"And he didn't think that she might come to hate him if John
would have died and she had not been here to say goodbye?"

"It's been a long time since I had any idea of what my son
thought, Doctor Benton. It's been that way since Bobby was
diagnosed with leukemia. When Bobby died, Roland had difficulties
dealing with his wife and the children and Laura, of course,
was in shock from Bobby's death. As a result of what was
happening with Roland and Laura, we found it necessary to send
John and Barbara to boarding schools. I guess you could say
that the children lost their brother and their parents at the
same time. I don't like to think of myself as showing favoritism
toward any of my grandchildren, Doctor Benton, but there are
times when I find myself paying a little extra attention to John
and Barbara."

"Like when you took his trust fund away?"

She sent a sideways glance in his direction. "That was by his
choice, not mine. He could have kept the trust fund. I never
offered an ultimatum to him. I merely made the comment that
they, meaning the grandchildren, had no problem living off of
the work of the family and never wanted to give anything back.
He then told me that if I really thought that about him then I
could keep the money. So, I did. I know it's been difficult
for him to adjust to having nothing but his salary, but I also
know that John will succeed on his own terms. Achieving his
dream of becoming a doctor has not been easy for him. Oh, I
know that financially speaking it has. But, there has to be
more than that. It often helps if your family is standing
behind you, urging you on and giving you support when you hit
a rough spot."

Peter remembered how his mother had always been there to cheer
him on and he nodded. "It's easier to do when your family is
behind you, believing in you."

"John was supposed to graduate from the Wharton School of
Business, then start work in my husband's company. Robert
wanted him to be trained to take over the company when Robert
was ready to retire. My husband has not ever agreed with nor
condoned John's decision to be a doctor. In Robert's eyes, it
was a waste of time, a childhood dream that should have been
discarded once John grew older. I think that Roland backed
John only because he liked the fact that he was keeping his own
father from getting what he wanted." She turned to him, a
faint smile on her lips. "We are not a nice family, Doctor
Benton. Not a nice family at all. We have our charity work
to make us feel as if we're giving back to the community, but
it doesn't take away from the fact that we are not nice at all."

"John's a nice person."

"Yes, he is. John is caring and trusting. A little naïve at
times. I have no idea how he ended up that way. God knows he
wasn't raised in a caring and trusting environment. Well, I
take that back. Bobby adored him. Bobby had always wanted a
little brother, and when John was brought home, Bobby took to
him immediately. He took John under his wing and protected him.
Those two children loved each other very much. When Bobby had
to be in the hospital or go to the doctor, he would insist that
John go along with him. The hospital would be forced to put a
cot in Bobby's room for John or else face Bobby's wrath. For
a boy weakened by the ravages of leukemia, Bobby could throw a
very impressive fit in order to get his way." She smiled as
memories of her grandson swept through her mind.

"Bobby's the reason John became a doctor, isn't he?"

"Yes. Well, I'm sure you're bored by my recounting of the
Carter family woes. My main point was that this is the best
Roland and Laura can do."

Peter looked into the ICU. Roland and Laura Carter were
standing by John's bed, but not touching him. He wondered
if they were even trying to talk to him. When they turned
around to leave, he didn't see any emotion displayed on their
faces. Both of them appeared to be made of stone. It hit him
then how much he had in common with John's parents. He had
learned long ago to cut himself off from his emotions. Emotions
only got in the way of his goals. How ironic that he, a black
man from a poor section of Chicago, could have so much in
common with a rich white man from the richest part of the same
city.

When Roland and Laura joined them in the hallway, Millicent
gave them both quick hugs. "Well, I've been up here for hours
sitting with John. It's about time I took a break. Laura,
you'll sit with him while I'm gone?"

"Of course," Laura automatically replied.

Millicent smiled. "I probably won't be gone for long. Roland,
will you escort me to the cafeteria?"

"Yes, Mother."

Millicent turned back to Peter. "Thank you for your help,
Doctor Benton. I'll be seeing you later."

"Yes, ma'am."

Peter watched Millicent and her son walk toward the elevators,
then he turned to head back into the ICU. He held the door
open. "Mrs. Carter?"

Laura broke her gaze away from the retreating pair and walked
back into the ICU. "Thank you," she said as she passed by
Peter.

Well, he thought, she might not be a loving and demonstrative
person, but she's certainly polite.

"Is John asleep because of medication?" she asked him.

"He's in quite a lot of pain. He gets his medication about
every four or five hours and usually awakens around the time
for the next dose." Peter check his watch. "Which should be
any time now. He is beginning to stay awake for longer periods
of time though, which is a good sign."

She nodded. "You only mentioned some of his injuries, but
not what happened. I was told he had been in an accident, but
Roland didn't have any details for me."

They were now to John's bed and Laura sat down in the chair
that Millicent had left by the bedside.

"John was leaving to go visit his cousin Chase at the Kenner
Institute. Another doctor, Max Rosher, who had been doing
consulting work here, went with him to discuss something.
While they were talking, a child managed to get down on the
El tracks. A train was coming and John jumped down to the
tracks to get the little girl. He tossed her to Doctor Rosher
but wasn't able to get off of the track and ended up being
hit by the train. He suffered some severe injuries, but
luckily for him, the train was going rather slowly at that point."

"And the little girl was all right?" Laura had taken John's
hand into her own and was gently stroking the back of it.

"She was scared, but she wasn't injured. John was thrown
by the impact and ended up with a lot of internal injuries.
His left side, from the middle of his rib cage to the top of
his hip, was literally torn open. His left kidney suffered
so much damage that it had to be removed and his right kidney
was also damaged, although we were able to repair it with
surgery. He also lost his spleen. His left arm was fractured,
as were his left leg and thigh. He also has a hairline
fracture of the skull, but all the CAT scans have shown us
that no damage was done to the brain as a result of the fracture.
Other than having fractured ribs and contusions, that's about
it."

"That's a lot for one body to handle," she gazed down at her
son and Peter began to think that maybe she wasn't so heartless
after all. "A friend of his died from being hit by a train.
Did you know Dennis Gant?"

"Yes, ma'am, I did. He was one of my interns."

She looked thoughtful, then nodded. "I believe John might
have mentioned that. So, what will John be facing as far as
his recovery goes?"

"We put pins his arm, thigh and leg because of the numerous
breaks. He'll need a lot of physical therapy, but so far his
x-rays are showing that the bones are beginning to mend
correctly. I think he'll make a full recovery."

She nodded again. "Good. Is he waking up now?"

Peter looked at John, who was awkwardly moving his body. "I
think so. He's uncomfortable, partially from the pain and
partially from having to lie in one position all the time. If
you'll excuse me, I have some other patients to see."

"Thank you for answering my questions, Doctor Benton." She
smiled up at him and he nodded to her, then went to check on
the other patients he had in the ICU.

Laura smiled as John opened his eyes. "John? It's Mom. I'm
here, honey."

John took a few moments to orient himself, then he smiled.
"Hey. Gamma said you and Dad were here, but I kept missing
you."

"She told you that, huh?" Laura made a mental note to thank
Millicent for lying to cover for her and Roland. After Robert
had called them in Paris to order them to come home, Roland
had confessed to her that John's injuries had been far more
serious than he had led her to believe. If it wasn't for the
presence of their daughter on the plane, the trip back to
Chicago would have been a silent one. Laura had never been
so angry with her husband in her life and she wasn't sure if
she would ever get over this latest deception of his.

"Yeah. I guess I slept though your visits." He yawned and
shifted in the bed, then grimaced as pain shot through his
body. "Damn," he softly swore.

"Under the circumstances, I think I'll ignore that remark.
Barbara's here, too. We ran into a friend of yours on the
way in and Barbara stayed downstairs to talk to her."

"Her who?"

"Anna Del Amico." Laura could tell that the flash of pain in
his eyes at hearing that name was not because of his physical
injuries. Barbara had told her that John had confided to her
that he was in love with the woman, but that the feelings were
not returned. Anna wanted to be his friend and nothing more.
But, from what Laura had noticed while being introduced to her,
Anna cared for John far more than a friend would. There were
dark circles under her eyes, a sign of worry and futile
attempts to sleep. Her eyes had a glow in them though when
she spoke about John. There had been a time when her own
eyes glowed when she spoke Roland's name, Laura remembered.
But, it had been a long time ago. A very long time ago.

"Is Dad here?"

"He went to get some coffee with your Gamma."

"I think Gamma's been here all morning."

"She's been worried about you. We've all been worried about
you. You gave us quite a scare," Laura managed to lie. She
hoped he would believe her. She had never been good at lying,
a trait he had inherited from her. The two of them were
transparent when it came lies. But, if she would have known
the truth about his injuries, then she would have been scared
for him. Hell, she was scared. Running an infection while
only having one functioning kidney was not good. Not good at
all. Despite Peter Benton's reassurances that everything was
getting better and that they had spared his remaining kidney
further damage by using dialysis, Laura found herself wondering
if John might be in danger of losing that kidney as well. If
she might be in danger of losing him.

She couldn't hold back her tears though when he looked up with
big eyes and said he was sorry for making her worry.

"Oh, honey, you don't have anything to be sorry about."

"Mom?"

Laura turned at the sound of her daughter's voice. With Barbara
was Ann Del Amico.

"You have good timing, John's awake." She wiped the tears from
her eyes, then turned back to John, squeezing his hand. "Look
who's here."

Barbara Carter took a few steps to bring herself beside her mother.
It was painful to see her brother so pale, so bruised and cut, and
with tubes sticking out of his body. She then chided herself for
her inward shiver of distaste for his physical appearance. If it
was this painful for her to see him, she couldn't begin to imagine
what it must be like to be him right now.

"Hey, Johnny," she reached out and stroked the back of his hand.
It was apparent that their mother had no intention of letting go
of it anytime soon.

"Hey," he sent a weak smile her way.

"I don't want to tire you out, so I'll just stand here and keep
quiet. That way you won't feel you have to talk."

"Don't mind," he said. Then he yawned. "Sorry. I'm still
tired."

"You're going to be tired for a few more days, John," Anna said
as she picked up his chart and read the results of his latest
vital signs check. "Your body needs to heal and it can do that
the easiest if you're asleep."

"Not much to see in here anyway," he lowly commented.

"That's pretty much true. I.C.U. isn't the most interesting
place. Once you can be moved to your own room, you'll have a
t.v. to keep you company."

He smirked. "I don't think I can handle the anticipation of
waiting."

"John," his mother began, but Anna laughed.

"I think we'll find a way for you to manage. Well, it was nice
to meet you, Mrs. Carter. And it was really nice to talk with
you, Barbara."

"Do you have to leave now?" Laura asked.

Anna nodded. "I need to get back to work. It seems we're one
doctor short downstairs and he has some pretty tough shoes to
fill. I'll come by later, John."

"Okay," he yawned again.

Anna quietly left. The Carter women remained quiet by John's
bedside, watching as he slowly lost his fight to remain awake.
Once asleep, they were able to talk quietly.

"Anna seems nice," Laura commented.

Barbara nodded. "She is. She cares a lot about John. She's
just so afraid that he won't have anything to do with her once
he's out of here."

"Why?"

"It's a complicated story, Mom. Let's just say that they had
a terrible argument the day he was injured. Anna's afraid that
he doesn't love her anymore."

"Because of an argument? That doesn't sound like John. Once
he gives his heart, he gives it fully."

"I tried to reassure her. Once he's able to stay awake for
longer periods of time, she'll see that her fears are groundless."

"I hope so. John deserves to be happy and if she can make him
happy, then I'm all for it."

"Me, too."



A few days later, John was moved into a regular room. He was
still sleeping a lot, but when he was awake he was completely
coherent. He was trying to keep from taking as much pain medication,
but once they started his physical therapy, he found himself
accepting it when it was offered. Things were not as strained
between him and Anna as they had been before he had left the
hospital on that fateful day. He was grateful for that. If
nothing else, at least they could still be friends, right? And
friendship was something he could handle. One day, Anna was in
his room telling him what had been going on down in the E.R. when
he realized that he had bills due any day. Without thinking about
it, Anna offered to take care of that for him. And without
thinking about it, he had found himself accepting her offer. He
gave her the keys to his apartment and told her where she would
find the bills and his checkbook. One of his neighbors was already
picking up his mail for him and he asked Anna to collect for him
as well and take care of any bills that were there.

After she left, he found himself wondering why he had accepted
her offer. His parents and sister were still in town. Either
one of them would have been more than willing to handle it for
him. But, the idea of having Anna in his apartment, even if she
was only sitting at his desk, made shivers run down his spine.
Not eerie shivers either. No, they were the kind of shivers that
ended with a spike in the brain, sending waves of pleasure and
anticipation outward. If nothing else, he would always know that
she had sat in that chair, held that pen, and touched those papers.
He would imagine the scent of her there in his apartment.
Knowing that there was no one around to see him, he leaned back
against his pillows and smiled. A person could never be hurt by
a fantasy, he mused.

The next morning, Anna went to John's place. She was impressed
with the apartment. Even though it was only five minutes away
from the hospital, and not in an exclusive neighborhood, it was a
nice building and a great apartment. Two bedrooms, one which had
its own full bath. A separate kitchen and dining area. Large
living room with a gas fireplace. She grimaced as she spied a glass
jar on the mantel - it contained an organ. A human organ. It was
apparent that no one had been in the place since John had left for
work weeks ago. His breakfast dishes from that day still sat in
the sink, a slight film on them. Thank God he had rinsed them.
Anna cringed as she thought about what they would be looking like
by now if he had not. His bedroom was untidy as well, looking as
if he had been in a hurry to get ready for work. She glanced at
her watch, then decided she had time for a little light housekeeping.
She headed back to the kitchen and filled the sink with hot, soapy
water and put the dishes in there to soak. Then she straightened
out his bedroom. The bathroom needed only a light cleaning, and
as she wiped a polishing cloth on the faucet handles she wondered
why it was that John had not chosen the other bedroom. That was
the one that had it's own bath. He wasn't even using it for storage.
It was just an empty room. Well, maybe she'd ask him about that
someday.

After doing the dishes, Anna sat down at the desk in the living
room and pulled out John's bills. She added them to the few that
had been in the mail, then pulled out his checkbook. She would
write the checks, address and stamp the return envelopes, then take
them all to the hospital for him to okay and then sign. First
things first, though, she thought, I need to make sure he has enough
money to cover his bills. She added the bills together, then
opened the checkbook, going to the last entry to see if John had
been keeping a running balance. What she saw there made her eyes
widen. It was barely enough to pay his bills. Maybe he had made
a mistake? Not added his deposits correctly? She knew that he had
to be making the same salary as she was.

Feeling like an intruder, she flipped through the checkbook several
times, then read slowly through it. John had not made a deposit
of any kind since spring. Not a single one. He had mentioned a
savings book, and she searched through the desk drawer until she
found it. John must be depositing his paychecks in his savings
account, she thought. But a thorough examination only revealed
that his savings were nearly depleted. John Carter was a few
rent payments away from being completely broke. She knew he
had given up his trust fund, so he didn't have that money to
rely upon anymore, but what had happened to his paychecks? Was
he cashing them and using cash to pay his bills? A scan of
his paid bills showed her that was not the case. He had used
checks to pay his bills. The only thing she could do was
write out the checks for his bills now and later when she went
to get him to sign the checks, she could ask him about his
paychecks. Glancing at the clock, she saw that she only had
thirty minutes before she had to report for duty in the E.R.
Barely enough time to get his few bills paid and catch the El.

Anna paused in the doorway to John's room. He was doing so
much better - the physical therapy was helping him a lot,
even though it tired him out. He was finally getting some
color back into his cheeks.

He looked up, saw her and smiled. "Hello. Guess what?"

She stepped into the room and pulled the chair up next to
the bed. "What?"

"I can leave this place by the end of the week provided I
make some type of arrangements to have someone stay with me
during the day and take me back and forth for physical therapy,
but I can finally go home," he was grinning from ear to ear.
"I don't mind working here, but having to stay here as a
patient is not my idea of a good time."

"You aren't here to have a good time, John," she joked.
"You're here to get better."

"Not by eating this food, that's for sure. Did you have
any problem finding my bills and check book?"

"No. I have the checks here for you to sign." She put the
checks and their corresponding bills on his bedtray, then
handed him a pen. He scanned the bills, then signed the checks.

"I really appreciate your help, Anna."

"It's no problem. I even took the time to straighten your
place up a little. You weren't too neat when you left it the
last time."

"I was running late for work. You didn't have to do that."

"I didn't mind. I do have a question though."

"Hopefully, I'll have an answer for you." He leaned back
against his pillows and waited for her question.

"Where are all your paychecks? I looked through your checkbook,
but I don't see any deposits at all listed."

He chewed on his lower lip and Anna knew then that he had been
hiding something from her. Again. She sighed, then hoped he
had not heard her.

He had. "I'm sorry. I wasn't intentionally keeping this from
you - I thought you already knew."

"Knew what?"

"I don't get paid."

"Excuse me?"

John licked his lips, then told her the story of how he managed
to switch his residencies, including his offer to work for no
pay.

"So, now I'm stuck. I have no paycheck, no trust fund. I've
cashed in all my certificates and other investments; my
savings are nearly all gone. I don't know how I can afford
to keep my apartment. The lease will be coming up in a few
months. It's a great place and I hate to lose it, but I just
can't afford the rent anymore."

"I noticed that you have two bedrooms. Why don't you get a
roommate?"

He shook his head. "I don't think I would feel comfortable
having another roommate in there. Things didn't work out
right with the original one."

"The two of you didn't get along, huh?"

"We got along fine. He died." John looked away from her,
not wanting to have to tell her the story of Dennis Gant and
the circumstances surrounding his death. Especially in light
of how he had been injured. For about the millionth time, he
found himself wondering if that had been the platform where
Dennis had been hit. He shrugged. "I'll think of something
before I tell the landlord that I don't want to renew the lease."

"But, you do want to renew it. You just can't afford it.
John, it's a nice place. I love the fireplace. Not too sure
about the decorations on the mantel, but the fireplace itself
is wonderful."

He grinned. "I happen to like seeing Peter Benton's appendix
up there every day."

"That's Benton's? How on earth did you get that?"

"I did his appendectomy."

"Oh, my God! Does he know you have it?"

"I guess. I wasn't shy about sharing the photos with everyone.
But, I could be wrong. After all, I thought you had heard by
now that I wasn't getting paid and I was wrong about that."

Anna decided to take a bold step and she hoped that it wouldn't
backfire on her. John had already mentioned that he would
need someone to look after him once he was released from the
hospital. "John, how about if I move in with you?"

He immediately looked down, his good hand nervously twisting
the edge of the blanket. "Anna, I think that might be rushing
things too much."

"I don't mean as your lover. I mean as your roommate. You've
seen the roach palace where I live. I would bet that what I
currently pay would be equal to half of what your apartment
runs per month. You said that you'll need someone to look in
on you and take you to therapy, so how about me? I'm not sure
if I can be a good nurse, but I can certainly give it my best
shot. Plus, we'll have a chance to get to know each other
better."

"I don't know. A lot has happened lately, Anna. Too much to
take in at one time."

"I know what you mean. Will you at least think about it? I
need to get back to work."

He nodded. "I'll think it over. Thanks for taking care of
my bills and for cleaning up a little." He smiled up at her.

"You're welcome." She gathered the bills and checks together,
then headed back for work. She hoped he would decide to accept
her offer. She wanted so much to prove to him that she cared
about him. Still, she knew that suddenly smothering him with
devotion would be going overboard. He had to work things out
for himself in his own time. She knew he cared about her and
right now that was enough. It had to be enough.


End of Part 3