First Day/Last Day
By Lynne Facella
mulderette@aol.com

Category: JC & PB Friendship
Disclaimer: All ER characters are the property of Warner Brothers, NBC, etc.
Spoilers: Season Seven through "Mars Attacks"
Note: Just a short post scene to "Mars Attacks"



John Carter sighed as he left the ER and headed towards his jeep. What a day. There was just so much to think about. It had started off poorly. He had felt like an outsider in the place that had been his second home for the past six years. His I.D. was no longer valid, his locker was cleared out. He had known it was going to be hard but not this hard. Romano with his snide remark, calling him a "drugstore cowboy," and the ultimate humiliation...being forced to pee in a cup in front of Dr. Greene. He had been so tense he was afraid he wouldn't be able to go, but ultimately he had. He knew that Mark had been uncomfortable too, but that didn't make it any easier.

To top things off, just as he was leaving, he had heard that Dr. Benton had been fired, and if the rumors were true, basically just out of spite. He couldn't even imagine what it would be like to work at County without Dr. Benton. The two had always had a complicated relationship, full of ups and downs. Dr. Benton had always challenged him. He had pushed and pushed and pushed and John had strived to achieve, always trying to please Dr. Benton. Even now that he was back in the ER and no longer Benton's surgical student, a kind or a cruel comment from Benton still had the power to make or break John's day. He knew that he would miss him.

John got into his jeep and drove. He was still wound up from the events of the day and didn't feel like going home. Somehow he ended up at Dr. Benton's sister's house. He sat in his jeep for a few moments, wondering what the heck he was even doing there, but finally got up his nerve and made his way to the front door.

"Hi Jackie. Is Dr. Benton here?" he asked softly as she came to the door. He had a passing thought about how he always referred to him as Dr. Benton, never just Peter, even to his own sister.

"Hello Carter," Jackie replied, looking surprised to see him there. "I'm sorry but Peter isn't here. He's over at Cleo's."

"Oh." His heart sunk at that information. Cleo had hardly been able to disguise what John felt sure was contempt for him today at the hospital. She had obviously known where John had been. Considering Dr. Benton had accompanied him to Atlanta, John guessed that it probably couldn't have been kept from her, but he wished somehow it could have been. He had felt very uncomfortable in front of her today.

He suddenly noticed that Jackie was staring at him with a very odd look on her face. "I'm sorry...what?" he asked, embarrassed that he had no idea what she had said.

"I asked if you needed Cleo's address."

John found himself nodding even though he had no idea why. "Yeah, thanks. That would be great."

Jackie wrote down the address and a few minutes later John found himself driving towards Cleo's home. When he arrived, he found himself sitting in the jeep even longer than he had at Jackie's house. He wondered what exactly was possessing him to be on this quest to find Dr. Benton. He guessed just needed to talk to him. Benton had gone beyond the call of duty three months ago and if there was anything at all that John could do to return the favor, he wanted to. Even if Benton threw him out, at least he would know that he had tried.

He rang the doorbell and stood nervously, shuffling his weight from one foot to the other. After what seemed to be an endless wait, Cleo came to the door.

"What do you want Carter?" she asked, giving him an icy look as she stood blocking the entrance.

"Um...I wondered if I could speak to Dr. Benton for a minute," he replied, looking her in the eye. He was determined not to let her get under his skin.

Cleo seemed to be considering his request and finally reluctantly moved aside so John could enter. "Come in."

Cleo led John into the seemingly empty living room. "Peter...Carter is here to see you." Cleo's expression was as dull and lackluster as the tone she spoke in. John briefly wondered what Peter saw in her. Then again, his own choices regarding the opposite sex had not always been the wisest, so who was he to judge?

"Dr. Benton?"

Peter was slouched on the couch and sat up a little straighter when he saw Carter. "Hey Carter," he said wearily. "What are you doing here?"

"Mind if I sit for a minute?"

"No," Peter sighed. "Go ahead, sit down."

"I'll be in the kitchen." Cleo flounced out of the room without a backwards glance.

"I heard what happened to you," John began, ignoring Cleo's rudeness.

"Yeah, well I'm sure I'm the talk of the hospital."

"I wanted you to know that I'm really sorry. I can't believe Romano did that."

Peter leaned his head back against the couch. "Yeah well Romano can do whatever he wants to."

"No," John said. "He can't. You need to fight him on this Dr. Benton."

"Carter..." Peter held up his hand, signaling for John to stop. "If you don't mind, I'd rather not talk about this, okay?"

"Sure, okay. I'm sorry," John said, nodding. He was starting to realize that he should not have come.

Peter felt a surge of guilt as Carter seemed to deflate before his eyes. "Don't worry, Carter. I'll be fine." He clapped the younger man on the shoulder. "Really."

"Okay." John found his eyes wandering around the living room. "Cleo has a nice place."

"Yeah, she does." Benton suddenly remembered what today had been. His last day had been Carter's first day back. "So, how did it go today, Carter?"

"It was..." John struggled to find the right word, but couldn't. "I guess it could have been worse," he finally said with a grin.

"Hey you know how first days are," Benton said, smiling. "It'll get better, Carter. You'll get through it."

"I know I will." John leaned forward, clasping his hands in his lap. "You know...for a while I was just really frustrated today. I felt like I couldn't be trusted to do anything. But then I met the most amazing kid. He was in a wheelchair, paralyzed after being hit by a car. He just had the greatest attitude. He actually lives in a retirement home, and this kid just wasn't feeling sorry for himself. He talked about how he comes into the hospital and sees lots of kids who are worse off than he is."

John bit his lip thoughtfully for minute as he looked at Peter. "It made me feel bad, you know? How much time have I wasted feeling sorry for myself over the past six months and here's this little kid who's been through Hell and back who just blew me away with his outlook. "

"Carter, don't beat yourself up, man," Benton said, reaching over and patting Carter's knee. "What happened, happened. You're trying to get your life back now and that's all you should be focusing on. You have to try to concentrate on the present, not dwell in the past."

Carter nodded. "You know, I didn't come here to talk about myself," he said, smiling sheepishly. "And I really should be going anyhow, let you get back to Cleo."

"Yeah, okay," Benton smiled.

The two men stood up and Benton walked Carter to the door. "Carter, thanks for coming by. I really do appreciate it."

"No problem, Dr. Benton, and I still think you should fight Romano."

"I'll see, Carter. Okay?"

"Okay," Carter grinned, as he held out his hand. "You take care, Dr. Benton."

Benton ignored Carter's hand and instead pulled the younger man into a somewhat awkward embrace. "You take care too, Carter," he said gruffly, "and don't be a stranger, you hear?"

"I won't, Dr. Benton. I'll see ya."

Peter watched as Carter made his way down to his jeep and drove out of sight. He suddenly felt better after Carter's visit. Carter was doing his best to fight and get his life back. Peter decided that he would do the same. He wasn't going to give up without a fight.

The End