I'll See You Tuesday
By Lynne Facella
mulderette@aol.com

Category: JC & KW Friendship

Disclaimer: All ER characters are the property of Warner Brothers, NBC, etc.

Spoilers: All In the Family through Sand and Water

Note: Just a short little thing I felt like writing after the meeting in "Sand and Water."



John was back and Kerry went off to find Mark so they could meet with him. She had spoken briefly to John on the phone, but was eager to actually see him, to get him back working. Mark seemed less than enthusiastic as they bantered on their way to meet with John, believing it was too soon for him to return to work. Kerry disagreed. They would go easy on him, watch him very closely, but she believed it was better for him to return to work as soon as possible. It was what he wanted and she supported this.

The meeting was tense. After they had exchanged awkward greetings, Kerry handed John the forms outlining the terms for his reinstatement to the hospital. He would undergo random urine testing and was going to be required to take Naltrex to aid in his recovery. Kerry felt as ill-at-ease as she had at the intervention when John realized he was expected to take the pill in front of them. When he opened his mouth, to prove he had swallowed it, she had to fight not to react. Immediately afterwards, he looked ashamed and mumbled an apology. If she and Mark were this uncomfortable, she could not begin to imagine how hard this was for John. The beepers going off had granted her and Mark the opportunity to escape, bringing an end to the horrid little meeting. It had not gone at all how Kerry would have liked.

John never completely left her mind for the rest of the day. Even as she dealt with the difficult intubation case, he kept popping into her head. By the time she finished her shift, late that night, she decided she just couldn't leave things as they had been left after the meeting. She drove to John's apartment building but was dismayed to find that he either was not answering her repeated rings of the buzzer or he was not home. She had just turned to leave when she saw him walking up the front steps. Their eyes met and he stopped, appearing stunned.

"Hi Dr. Weaver," he said softly as he finished climbing the stairs and stood in front of her. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to talk to you, John," she began hesitantly. "I didn't like how we left things earlier."

He shrugged, shaking his head. "It was okay. I don't expect…"

Kerry put her hand on his arm, stopping him. "Please. It won't take long."

"All right." He nodded and they walked silently to his apartment.

"Can I get you anything, something to drink?" he asked after Kerry had seated herself on the couch.

"Maybe just some water." Kerry offered him a small smile, hoping to get one in return, but his expression remained solemn.

He went to the kitchen to get the water and Kerry took the opportunity to look around. His apartment was very sparsely furnished. It actually looked pretty unlived in. She knew that he had just moved back here after staying with his grandparents for a while so perhaps that explained it.

John returned to the living room, handed the water to Kerry, and sat down next to her on the couch. He fiddled with his own glass, causing the ice cubes to clink against the glass.

"How are you, John?" Kerry asked, noting how uneasy he seemed with her. She could hardly believe this was the same young man who had been a tenant in her home. They had shared an easy-going relationship back then. They had been comfortable with each other. So much had changed since those days.

"I'm doing fine. You know…" he trailed off, unsure of what she wanted to hear, unsure of why she had come.

"We ended so abruptly today," Kerry began. "I don't think I made it clear to you how glad I am that you're back. I want you to know that I will do everything I can to help you."

He nodded, still uncertain. "I appreciate that."

Kerry sighed. She still did not feel like she was getting through to him. "John…really. I want you to know that you can come to me about anything that is bothering you, anything that might be a potential problem, no matter how insignificant it may seen. I feel somehow we let you down before. I don't want that to happen again."

"No, you didn't let me down." John shook his head, finally meeting Kerry's eyes. "I let myself down. I know I let all of you down too…and I'm sorry."

"You're going to get through this John. I know that you can." He looked so alone, so vulnerable. Kerry didn't really think he had many friends outside of the hospital. She regretted that she had not paid closer attention to him after the stabbing. She knew she would never forget the day she had found John and Lucy bleeding to death on the floor in Curtain Three, but it was something that she tried to block from her mind. She still had the occasional nightmare, could still remember vividly every detail of that day and she knew for John it was so much worse.

"You have an awful lot of people who care about you, John, who want to help you. She gently put her hand over his. "I just want you to know that."

"Thank you Dr. Weaver" He smiled, a real smile this time, one that reached his eyes. "I'm glad you came."

"Me too, but I really do have to go," she replied gruffly, not wanting to become emotional in front of him. "I have an early shift tomorrow."

"Okay," he stood up, putting his glass down on the coffee table. "I'll walk you out."

"Thank you." She put her glass down next to his and they made their way companionably down to her car. Kerry unlocked her door and just before she got in she reached for John, pulling him into her arms for a hug. He was surprised, but only momentarily, and returned her embrace. Finally, they pulled away, smiling at each other.

"I'll see you Tuesday, John," Kerry said as she got into her car.

"I'll see you Tuesday," he echoed. He stood waiting until she had started her car and began to drive away with a final wave.

Kerry watched John through her rear view mirror as he turned and headed back towards his building. She felt much better and was glad she had decided to come. She knew John had a hard road in front of him, but she somehow felt confident that he would make it.



End