Instant Attraction, Part 23
Fortune
By Miesque
miesque48@hotmail.com

(just two more parts to go, I think...geesh...)
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: Possible for season 7

STORY SYNOPSIS: If I say anything I’ll be giving it all away! *G*

DISCLAIMER: The characters of Luka Kovac and Kerry Weaver are the sole property of NBC, Warner Brothers, Amblin, and Constant C.

PRAISE TO: My Canadian mentor and my friends in Oklahoma for continued editing, support, and encouragement. Where would I be without y'all?

PREVIOUS INSTALLMENTS: Instant Attraction; Room For Rent; Fired; Blackout; On The Line; Point of Refuge; Heart to Heart; Double-Take; Broken Valentine; In Memory...; Paint It Black; Hope Springs Eternal; Bridges; My Brother’s Keeper; Getting the Shift; Sister Wolf; Before the Storm; Grounded; Learning to Fly; Safari; Safe Harbor; A Burning Thing

TO TPTB: If y’all want to steal my storyline, feel free to do so. I won’t ask for a nickle. Honest! ;)



“To tell you the truth, Kerry, I have no idea what we should do today,” Luka said, leaning against the SUV. He was wearing a white T-shirt, faded jeans and black boots-a contrast to his usual neat, elegant attire.

“Well, we could go to the conference and listen to some speeches.”

Luka rolled his eyes. “I would do that only if I had some trouble sleeping,” he said. “But last night I slept really well.”

“You did?”

He nodded. “Yes. Out cold for nine good hours. A definite first. Must be something in the air.”

She smiled at him. “Maybe you’re at peace, Luka. Maybe you’re feeling good.”

He nodded in agreement. “What about you? Did you sleep well?”

Kerry laughed. “Like a baby.”

“Well, I can assure you, Kerry, that babies rarely sleep well... I had two of them. That is, they slept well sometimes. But we didn’t.”

“Were you like Shirley McClaine in ‘Terms of Endearment?’Always waking them up to make sure they were okay?”

“Kerry, when they were asleep, we would have killed anyone who dared to wake them up. When they slept, we got to... uh... play.”

There was a comfortable silence between them for a moment, then he stretched a little, wondering if he should ask such a personal question. Then he decided to let fly. “Have you... ever thought about having kids, Kerry?”

“Yes. I have,” she answered quickly. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot, in fact.”

He looked at his feet for a moment, and she waited, holding her breath.

“I want a family again,” he said quietly. “Maybe it’s part of my... my psychological makeup, but that’s what I always wanted,
really. A wife, kids... it’s funny, Kerry. Ten years ago, before we moved to Vukovar, we went to a fair in Split. You know, rides, gypsies, sideshows, a frightfully large woman with a beard... that kind of thing. There was a fortune teller there, and my wife dared me to have my fortune read. I remember what she said... she said I’d be happily married ten years from then. But she didn’t says ‘still’ happily married. Just ‘happily married’. And that I’d have ‘several’ children.”

Kerry swallowed. “Several?”

“Well, ‘several’ is a loaded word to some. For some, two can be too many.”

She smiled softly. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot, Luka. About the future. About us. About... what our kids would look like, in fact,” she confessed. She had been dreaming about a baby lately. She could feel it in her arms, smell that sweet baby smell. The clock was ticking loudly these days.

“They’d be tall... red-headed, most likely...”

“Temperamental.”

“Stubborn,” Luka grinned.

“Yes, but stubborn about the right things.”

He nodded, smiling a little. There was a far-off look in his eyes for a moment, then he looked directly at her again. “Are you saying... are you saying you’d like to have children... with... me?”

For a moment, Kerry waited, then she smiled at him. “I think we’d make a good team...it’s a matter of commitment... of loving each other even more than we love the kids.”

“It takes a lot of work,” Luka said quietly. “I was only married for six years and...” He looked down. “You have to be very mature to be married. You can’t expect someone to change after you marry them, you know?”

“Are you asking me to marry you, Luka?” she asked softly.

“Well, children need two parents,” he grinned. “I just hope you know what you’re getting into. That I have more than a few flaws, and that I’m not always easy to live with. I’m no knight in shining armor....”

She remembered the knight in her dreams-the one in black, rusted armor. “No, you’re not. You’re armor is pretty well banged up... and rusty.  But I’m certainly not one of those pretty little princesses. I escaped from  the ivory tower a long time ago...been living in the cold, real world for a long time. I’m not pretty, I have a limp, and I’ve got one hell of a nasty temper. But...”  She looked down. “I love you. I can’t imagine my life without you.”

“You’re beautiful,” he said firmly. “The most beautiful woman I know.”

“Even more beautiful than Carol Hathaway?” she smiled, still feeling a little insecure about her own looks.

Before he kissed her, Luka looked at her, brow furrowed. “Carol who?” Then he gathered her into his arms, drawing her in, making sure she knew how much he loved her.



Kerry sat on the hood of the SUV, wondering where Luka had gone off to. It had been several minutes since he’d disappeared into the woods, and she was starting to get a little worried, when suddenly he reappeared, a little out of breath, with his arm behind his back.

“What do you have there?” she called. He grinned and gave her a kiss, then whipped his arm around and presented her with a bouquet of tropical wildflowers. She drank in their sweet scent, blushing when he kissed her again.

“They’re beautiful,” she whispered, kissing him again. He helped her down and stood there a moment, letting her smell the flowers.

Luka took a deep breath. He hadn’t done this in so long, and he was pretty sure his knee would give him trouble when he knelt before her, but it was the right time. Davor had told him, again and again, of how important it was to seize the day - to live every day as if it were his last.

He suddenly remembered Davor’s reaction when he’d said he was going to Hawaii. His brother had been excited about it - practically jumping up and down with glee - and now he understood why. Davor had obviously had something to do with Kerry ending up his ‘neighbor’ at Kapalua. Huh, Luka thought. I guess my big brother does know best... sometimes. Of course, I won’t tell him that. No need letting him get an inflated ego.

“Kerry...” He swallowed, then slowly-gingerly-dropped to his knee. Her eyes widened with surprise, and he looked up at her, closing one eye and wrinkling his nose up at the sun. “Will you marry me?”

Her heart started pounding, and that little voice in her head - the one that was always being muted out by her sensible, practical, closed-off side-was screaming “Yes!”.

“Yes,” she whispered. “Absolutely.”

“Now... would you help me up?” he smiled. “My thirty-seven year old knee isn’t very happy right now.”

She burst into laughter, bent down and kissed him deeply, then she helped him back to his feet. They kissed again, lingering in the wonder of the moment.

“I don’t have a ring for you...yet. But I’ll get you one.”

“It’s all right,” she said, smiling, drinking in the scent of the flowers, her face pink and her heart still pounding like drums. “I already have a ring of fire around my heart.”



“Kerry, I want you to promise me one thing.”

She glanced at Luka, smiling slightly.  He had this strangely hunted expression his face. In fact, he had looked this way all day, from the moment they left Kapalua for the airport.

“What would that be?”

“Promise me you won’t move. It might cause the plane to shake and fall into the ocean.”

“Oh, come on, Luka!” she laughed. But then she sobered a little at his expression. He had told her he hated flying, and now he looked even a little panicky. He had ended up with a window seat, looking right out over the right wing, and he had said - in a nervous attempt at humor - that he should change his name to Valentine. At first, she didn’t know what he meant, then she remembered...the ‘Twilight Zone’ movie. John Lithgow, gone berserk on an airplane after seeing some kind of demon on the wing.

“All right, Luka, look at me,” she said. “You have to stay calm. It’s going to be fine. See? It’s very quiet, everyone’s relaxed. We’ll get you a nice blanket and a pillow... maybe some sleeping pills?... and you’ll sleep all the way to San Francisco.”

“And then change planes and do it all over again,” he said dully. “I really hate this. I remember throwing a fit once before getting on an airplane to Germany. It was really embarrassing.”

“When was this?”

“Oh, I was about twenty-three at the time, I think,” he said, his voice shaking. “Can’t we sail home?”

“No.” She didn’t want to tell him how afraid she was of the sea. The fact that they were sailing over the sea barely registered.

Kerry looked down at her hand. On her finger was a thin gold band with a tiny diamond stone. Luka had purchased it at a
little jewelry store in Honolulu. An engagement ring, she thought, amazed. I’m sitting here wearing an engagement ring... purchased by the man I love. Hell, it’s amazing enough that I’m wearing an engagement ring at all, love or not. If I’m dreaming, I don’t ever want to wake up. But Luka had pinched her last night before leaving to go to bed-she was awake. He had told her it was a tradition for a man to goose his fiancé at least once in between their engagement and their wedding, but she knew he was only teasing her.

“What are we going to tell everyone?” Luka asked her.

“About your irrational fear of flying?” she asked, grinning at him. He nudged her shoulder a little.

“About us,” he said. “Being engaged...”

“We’ll tell them the truth,” she answered quietly. “We should make plans, anyway.”

“Yes, we should. I think we should get married in July... that way we can go to Davor’s wedding already married and... surprise him.”

“Well, we don’t want to upstage them,” she reminded him. “I want it to be their day... and I like Isabelle. Davor...” she smiled, rolling her eyes. “Well, I like him, too.”

“You’re right... but I still think we should get married soon. Carpe diem, Kerry.” He kissed the back of her hand, and she smiled. “But I have a feeling he’s the reason you ended up my next-door neighbor.”

She smiled. “It took you long enough to figure it out!”

“I’m a little dense,” he chuckled.

“So how long did it take for you and your wife?”

He looked at her, confused. “What?”

“I mean, how long was your engagement?”

“Well...” He thought about it. He and Tatjana had gotten engaged in early March and were married in May. “Less than a month, I think. There were banns and announcements and all that, but that hardly seems necessary in this case.”

“What about the fact that I’m not a Catholic?” she said seriously. “Will that pose any problems?”

“I don’t think so. You believe in God, right?”

“Yes. Definitely,” she said softly. “You wouldn’t think it, would you?”

“I always thought you believed in Him. Otherwise, you wouldn’t respect my beliefs as much as you do.”

She nodded. She did respect his beliefs. His faith was important to him, and it made her love and admire him more for being true to it.

The plane began taxiing toward the runway, and Luka made the sign of the cross, praying quickly in Latin. Kerry watched him for a moment, then smiled. One last hurdle, she thought... or two. San Francisco, then another flight to Chicago. He’ll be all right.



Kerry stood outside the ambulance bay doors for a moment, absently fingering her engagement ring. She and Luka had discussed the situation carefully the night before, over a rather sparse meal of cold cereal, and had agreed that for now they would remain discreet about their relationship. Once it became public knowledge-and they both knew it would-they would
handle each situation as it came.

She had taken the ring off and hung it on a chain around her neck. Luka had approved of the idea, thinking it best to maintain her usual ‘give ‘em hell Kerry’ attitude at work. “I’m used to that side of you, Kerry,” he had said at breakfast. “Don’t worry about it.”

Well, she was a little worried about it. She was almost bubbling over with happiness, and wanted to tell someone she was getting married in one week. Seven days-about 168 more hours from now, she thought, looking at her watch, which read
10:58 A.M. They would be getting married at St. Jerome’s Church in town, in as small and simple a ceremony as humanly possible. She wondered, though, who the official witnesses would be. She was debating with herself about telling Mark, but feared he’d have it all over the hospital in five minutes. The other attendings and residents were much lower on her list. Perhaps Donald Anspaugh? He might actually be happy for her.

Kerry was still thinking about it when she looked up and caught Mark Greene’s face reflected in the doors. He was standing behind her, watching her curiously.

“Morning, Mark,” she said, tucking the chain and ring back under her blouse.

“Back from Hawaii, I see. You look... like you had a good time. I take it you didn’t attend many of the speeches.” He gave her a wicked grin.

“Let’s just call it a write-off,” Kerry answered smartly.

Mark turned to look at her curiously. Something was strange about her-she looked... bright? Cheerful? She was practically
glowing.

“Kerry, are you okay?” he asked. Well, of course she’s okay, Mark thought. She looks well-rested and relaxed. A rarity indeed.

“I’m just fine, Mark. Why do you ask?”

“I don’t know. You look different. What’s the word I’m looking for here...? ‘Chipper’? ‘Happy’?”

“Well, I did have a very good time in Hawaii,” she said. “I actually relaxed.”

“Well, good for you,” Mark said sincerely. “Everybody needs that.”

“So how have things been?” she asked, following him inside.

“Oh, pretty quiet, actually. The usual stuff... MVAs, GSWs, DOAs, SATs, BMWs, MIBs, LBJs, JFKs, KFCs...”

She rolled her eyes. “Seriously, Mark...”

“Really, Kerry. It was a little hard without you in charge... I gotta admit, I don’t have the head for all this paperwork and dealing with Romano, but things went okay.”

“Have you heard anything about Carter?”

“Yep. He’s doing well so far. The center calls every Friday with an update, and things are chugging along. He’s making progress, and that’s all we can hope for now.”

She nodded. “True. And how are you, Mark?” she asked sincerely.

“Pretty well,” he said, looking surprised. Was she softening on him? he wondered. “How are you?”

“Very well. I feel like I’m... just getting started. I’ve got my second wind. I highly recommend holidays in Hawaii. Just sitting in the sunshine, watching old guys rearrange themselves when they come out of the water... drinking daiquiris, eating roasted pork...”

Mark laughed out loud. “So you really did have a good time!”

“I only attended one speech,” she admitted. “But don’t tell Romano that.”

He laughed. “I doubt Rocket would have done that much, Kerry.”

“Well, he couldn’t spend much time on the beach or he’d get a headburn.”

Mark snickered and grabbed a chart. “Well, we’re on Kerry. Hey, when is Kovac in?”

“I don’t know,” she lied. “Randi, when does Dr. Kovac check in today?”

“One,” Randi answered, smacking her gum and blowing a casual bubble. Kerry gave her a cool glance, and Randi shrugged.

Kerry took a deep breath, grabbed a chart, and headed toward exam one.



“So you’re getting married, Luka.”

Luka watched Ben carefully, trying to read approval or disapproval in the man’s face. There was neither expression, so he answered carefully. “Yes. In one week.”

“I take it you’re ready.”

“Yes. I am. I don’t want to be alone any more. And I love her.”

“Good. You really aren’t made for bachelorhood, Luka. You’re a family man.”

Luka nodded in agreement and waited. Dr. Reed grinned at him. “Luka, if this woman...”

“Kerry. Kerry Weaver.”

“Really? Wow... I remember her in college. She was a go-getter... very determined, very ambitious... but with a lot of heart. Where do I send the wedding present?”

“What were you about to say?” Luka cut in.

“Well, if Kerry can make you happy, and provide the love and support you need, Luka, then there’s no way I would tell you not to do it. It sounds like you want this and it’s obvious that you’re ready. You’re healing. Of course, not all the wounds are healed over yet, but they will be. There’s always problems in any marriage, but it takes a lot of strength and maturity to work them out and deal with them.”

“Are you married?” Luka asked.

“Yes. I am. I married a girl I met in college, actually. She’s a few years younger, but it works. It’s a tough thing... but I guess you already know that. It takes commitment and dedication, but it’s not always that serious. There’s also a lot of laughter and just basic companionship. My wife and I can sit for hours and not say anything at all.”

Luka nodded. He and Kerry were already at that point. What really needed to be said? They didn’t agree about everything, but it just worked. He had come to realize that she was as much an introvert as himself. Just as guarded, just as tentative about reaching out. It had only taken two weeks in Hawaii and he had been found. He was saved.

“You know about jigsaw puzzles, Luka? How no two pieces look alike, and yet when you put them all together it makes a picture?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s marriage. If you marry somebody who’s just like you, they drive you crazy and you can’t live together - the pieces don’t fit together. It takes a lot of maturity to be a good husband or a good wife. You grow together, rather than apart, and you learn not to sweat the small stuff. I remember some politician, years ago, who said that his wife makes all the little decisions at home... where the kids go to school, what they wear, how the household is run, how the bills are paid, what kind of furniture they have, where they live, even. Meanwhile, he decides whether or not Red China should be admitted into the United Nations.  And it balances out somehow. It just takes some effort.”

Luka smiled slightly.

“Have you forgiven yourself about the past, Luka?” Dr. Reed asked.

He thought about it a moment, then nodded slowly. “I think so. Or at least I’m getting there. I pretended, a few months ago, to be a priest for a dying woman. I realize now that I wasn’t praying for her soul, I was praying for my own.”

“The Prayer of Contrition?”

“Yes.  I did it as a kindness, even though I knew it was a sin to do it.”

“There’s no sin in praying, Luka. It’s a bigger sin not to.”

“I know. But... it was her faith that counted. I’ve had my problems with my faith. I had trouble believing after Vukovar. But now, I want to believe. At the time, I couldn’t understand why God would allow things like that to happen... to let innocent people die so... horribly. My wife meant everything to me, and my kids were my world. They were... my life. And when they were murdered it was as if part of me had been cut off, but the wound just got numb...”

Dr. Reed nodded. “So I take it the wound is healing?”

“I think it’s healed... I won’t ever forget what happened, but... I think I’ve forgiven myself. I feel like the weight is off my shoulders now. That I’m getting better every day, a little at a time. I get up and go forward. I try to be positive, to take each day as it comes. I don’t worry about yesterday any more, or tomorrow.   Just today.”

“That’s good.  Each step is a little less painful, isn’t it?”

“Yeah... I’m feeling things again. I used to be so numb that I didn’t care about anything. Nothing bothered me. I suppose now things will bother me again, and I’ll be reacting, but... I’m better.”

Reed smiled slightly. “And you’re sleeping well?”

“Yes. I am. I don’t feel tired any more. I don’t feel run down... defeated.”

“That’s the best news I’ve heard in a while, Luka.”

“Yeah. It is.”

“Then let me be the first to congratulate you, Luka... but don’t think you’re all the way out of the woods. Whenever you have trouble, just give me a call. I’m always here to listen.”

Luka nodded and stood up slowly, shaking Dr. Reed’s hand. “So long as she’s happy, I know I’ll be happy.”



Kerry glanced at the clock. It was five ‘til one. Luka was usually a few minutes early, and she was starting to worry. Maybe... maybe he had panicked and bolted? She wouldn’t blame him, really. She had been in the ladies’ room a few minutes ago, listening to some of the young nurses talking, and one of them had mentioned Luka. “Dr. Kovac... God, he’s gorgeous. I wonder who he’ll date first?”

“Probably one of the pretty young things,” another nurse answered. “It’s perfectly natural. A guy that gorgeous attracts gorgeous women.”

That brought Kerry’s insecurities back up to the surface. Last night, Luka had told her she looked beautiful, and she had been able to believe it then, but now... hearing those women talk about her fiancé...

She laughed to herself.  My fiancé. Davor had told her that Luka was incapable of infidelity, and she knew he was right. She took the chain out and studied her ring for a moment. It was time for her lunch break. She went over to the front desk, informed Mark that she was leaving for an hour, and picked up the phone.



“You’re getting married?!” Jeannie gasped. “Oh my God!”

Kerry blushed, smiling only a little. “It was a little sudden, I guess. But... I guess he caught a clue.”

“To Dr. Kovac? Kerry, that’s wonderful. I always thought you were a little sweet on him.”

“Really?” Kerry said, startled. “Well, damn, Jeannie, you could have said something!”

“I always thought you were a ‘by-the-rules’ kind of person, that’s all. That it wouldn’t matter how crazy you were about him, you wouldn’t make any moves.”

“I used to be that way,” Kerry said. “But not any more. His brother... Davor, a bully if there ever was one... made it very clear to me, Jeannie. That I have to face the facts... that I’m not getting any younger and that Luka is perfect for me. That he’s... my Alpha Wolf.”

Jeannie smiled, shaking her head in amazement. “Kerry, I am so happy for you!  I always liked Luka... there was something very gentle about him, even though I didn’t get to know him very well. There’s this quiet strength to him, you know?”

“Yes, there is,” Kerry said softly. “He’s the best man I’ve ever known. He’s not perfect, but he’s perfect for me. I was... hoping, Jeannie, that you’d be my matron of honor. We’re getting married next week at St. Jerome’s.”

“I will be there with bells on, Kerry... just... not a foam green dress!”

Kerry laughed. “It’ll be a simple ceremony. No frills. And for now, we’re keeping it a secret. We’ve been trying to figure out some way to tell everyone, but so far...”

“Just tell them, Kerry. There’s no use letting false rumors get around. People... the nurses in particular... pick up on things just like that...” She snapped her fingers. “So just tell them, make sure everyone knows the truth, and let them deal with it.”



Kerry saw Luka leaning against the front desk when she came back in. He was on the telephone, carrying on a conversation with someone upstairs. “What do you mean the labs got lost?! Who loses two jars of urine, for God’s sake?”

She moved closer to listen to this one-sided conversation. “Oh, very funny. Find ‘em. I’ve got six patients waiting right now and three of them need those tests back ASAP.”

He hung up and turned around to see her standing there. “Hey... getting to see my nasty side, eh?”

She smiled. “The lab screwed up your orders?”

“They lost the samples,” he groaned. “Seems like the lab is being run by the Marx Brothers today.”

Kerry laughed. “Open the door and they all fall out at once,” she said. “I know this from experience.”

“Have you...told anyone yet?” he asked casually, looking up at the board.

“I told Jeannie,” she said quietly. “I asked if she’d be matron of honor.”

“Good.” He picked up a chart and perused it quickly. “St. Jerome’s, Friday at eleven in the morning.”

“I’ll be there.”

“I will too. I’ll be the guy in the suit, waiting at the altar.”

She smiled. Jeannie had told her that the wedding seemed almost like an elopement. In a way, it was. But they would have to announce this to everyone eventually. Kerry worried, though, what the administration would say about it. Lately, she’d been giving serious thought to just resigning her position as ER chief.  For some reason, the idea was gaining appeal to her. What kind of joy was she getting from it? It took so much time away from her private life... from Luka. For thirty-eight years she had been an ambitious, determined career woman. She still loved her work, but she realized now that her work would be so much more interesting and fulfilling if she had someone to go home to every day. She would love it more if she was able to get away from all the politicking, finagling, arguing and - Luka had said this once, and it had rankled her a little-ass-kissing that had to go on with her position. Why have all that trouble and worry when you can have real lasting happiness and a career you love all at once?

“I’ll be the lady in white,” she answered back.

“You’ll be wearing a lab coat to your own wedding?” he grinned.

She chuckled, shaking her head. “Which reminds me... I need to look for a dress... maybe I’ll go shopping with Jeannie tomorrow... something simple, of course.”

“Are you nervous?”

Mark was heading in their direction, and Luka put his hands in his pockets. He looked so calm and relaxed that Kerry wanted to punch him in the shoulder.

“A little. I’ve never done this before.”

“We won’t be able to have a honeymoon, you know,” he muttered sotto voce.

She looked up at him, unable to hide her disappointment. “You mean... we’ll have to wait...?”

He chuckled. “Are you nuts? My father was born exactly nine months after my grandparents’ wedding! We’ll just do what they
did... go upstairs.”

Kerry smiled, her cheeks turning pink. She turned her back to Mark, grabbed a chart, and rushed into exam room three to treat a ten-year old that had been bitten by his pet piranha.

“Hey,” Mark said. “You’re going upstairs, Luka?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I am. I have some people up in the lab that I need to strangle.” Luka turned his attention to Mark, completely calm. Even before his first wedding, he had been so relaxed he’d wondered if something was wrong. But his father had just laughed. ‘Kovac men mate for life, so what’s there to worry about?’ Asking about it to other relatives, Luka had been surprised to find that all the men in his family had been composed and confident before their marriages. There hadn’t been a divorce in the Kovac family since 1679, and if that didn’t mean something...

“Lost your samples again, huh?” Mark shook his head, commiserating. “Those people upstairs... they get better doughnuts, better hours... and they still lose our stuff.”

Luka nodded, smiling slightly.

“Hey, it’s good to have you back, Luka. We missed you around here. Chuny was saying yesterday how she wished she could hear you say ‘intubate’.”

“I’ll go find her and whisper it in her ear,” Luka said, which made Mark snort with laughter. Luka was surprised, however, to hear Mark say that he was ‘missed’. He wasn’t prepared for any kind of warmth from him, but he accepted it and after giving him a half-smile, he left to go find some lab technicians to yell at.

To be continued...