What adjective best describes Grant Aleksander?
a. Difficult
b. Distant
c. Unhappy
d. All of the above
e. None of the above

According to Aleksander, if you had circles "D" a few years ago, you would have been right. These days, "E" is the correct answer. On first meeting, Aleksander comes across as sincere, kind and humble, and all too aware of the reputation that precedes him. "Most people generally dislike me when they first meet me, because I have a cool and aloof demeanor. But it's a façade," smiles the handsome actor. "I think I just do that because I don't want people to know what a sucker I really am. If I could, I would probably do just about anything for someone."

That doesn't sound like Aleksander's ruthless ALL MY CHILDREN alter ego, Alec McIntyre. "Alec's a guy who does bad things-that's what attracted me to him," says the actor. "I can see what motivates him, and I share all his qualities-the good and the bad." Aleksander pauses before elaborating on that statement: "I think Alec is a real lonely and melancholy person and that's part of my personality, too. No matter how great things are going in my life, I tend to be brooding and introspective. Maybe it's sort of my built-in reality check. It drives my wife nuts, but she loves me anyway."

Aleksander wears his heart on his sleeve when it comes to his wife, actress Sherry Ramsey. The couple met while he was studying at Washington and Lee University in Virginia. "I knew I was in love with her 15 minutes after we met," smiles the Baltimore native. "We were doing a play together, and I knew that she was it for me. I came home and told my mom, 'Sherry is the woman I'm going to marry.'"

When Aleksander moved to New York a year later to pursue an acting career, Ramsey came with him. They have been together for 15 years (married for eight), but still behave like newlyweds. "We're still very attracted to each other and find each other interesting," grins Aleksander. "If you don't have something deeper after the 'I can't keep my hands off you' phase wears off, then you're in trouble. Sherry and I have a deep and abiding love, plus we're best friends." But even the strongest marriages have their ups and downs. "We have had a number of tough things to deal with throughout the course of our relationship. And there were times when we've both said, 'I'm hurting too much to give you what you need,'" he confides. "But we have managed to hang together and work it out-it has made us stronger."

One dark period that tested their union came in 1990, when both of Aleksander's parents succumbed to illness. Aleksander and his two older brothers were devastated by the loss of their close-knit family they'd always known.. "After my folks died, it was a real hard time for me, and I was beat up for a long time," Aleksander says softly. "It felt as if I were dead inside; nothing sounded good to me."

It was during this time that Aleksander left his stint at GUIDING LIGHT's Phillip Spaulding. "GUIDING LIGHT was a great job, and I was very lucky to play a character as great as Phillip, but there wasn't anything in the world that I wanted to do at that moment, and it took me a long time to get to the point where I wanted to work again," he offers. "I'm still trying to rebuild a lot of the foundation I lost after my folks died-I'm about 75 percent back. I still have my bad days, but I have regained faith that there is enjoyment to be had in life."

Returning to daytime has been a big part of Aleksander's healing process. "I love this medium, and I've been lucky to get a terrific storyline on ALL MY CHILDREN," he enthuses. "I love the acting circle I'm in and enjoy working with David Canary [Adam] and Teresa Blake [Gloria]." He is also found of his young co-star, Amir Jamal Williams, who plays Jamal, Alec's son. "I would take him home with me if I could. Amir is very special, and the mail that I have received about this storyline has shown strong support for their relationship."

The actor's new outlook on life has revived his desire to try other acting projects, but don't expect him to pack up and move to Los Angeles anytime soon. "I lived there two years before joining GUIDING LIGHT, and it just wasn't for me. It never felt like home out there-my home is clearly in the East," Aleksander says.

"I'm not terribly career-oriented anymore. I would do a film or theater, but it's not important enough-it's not life and death. If someone told me I could spend the rest of my life figuring out a genetic coding so I could come up with a vaccine to cure cancer, I would slave away at that with undying passion, because that is something that would make an enormous difference," he says earnestly. "The best thing I do right now is provide entertainment for people, and if I try to make it more important than what it is, I wind up feeling silly about myself."

This does not mean that Aleksander isn't serious about his work. "If I were ever lucky enough to have the A-list film career that everyone dreams about, I wouldn't turn my back on daytime or say 'Daytime sucks.'" He smiles. "I would come back and play this character or any other character again, because I don't ever want to have a chip on my shoulder-there just isn't any reason for it anymore."

SIDEBAR: Birds of a Feather

Before he was AMC's Alec McIntyre, Grant Aleksander played another corporate conniver, GUIDING LIGHT's Phillip Spaulding.

"He was a hero, but Phillip did a lot of bad things. I couldn't have played him for as long as I did if he didn't pull a few dirty tricks," laughs Aleksander, who wouldn't mind reprising his popular role, albeit on a limited basis. "If I could, I would return to GUIDING LIGHT every so often and play Phillip. I really liked him. He was an integral part of the Spaulding family, and I think the fans deserve to see him every now and then."#