Christmas Eve, 1987. Phillip is involved with Chelsea, and it’s starting to get serious. But he’s holding back and hurting Chelsea’s feelings because a large part of his heart still belongs to the “dead” Beth. So he goes to her grave to talk things over with her. He lays down a single red rose and kneels before the grave in the falling snow. It Came Upon a Midnight Clear plays in the background.

Phillip
Well, Beth, I’m all screwed up again. Surprise surprise, huh?

(He shakes his head)

It still just doesn’t make any sense to me. (Eyes tearing) How could you leave me when I needed you so much? How am I supposed to get through all this without you to keep me in line? (Long pause). You know, I could never figure out how you did that. But I think I finally have. (He sniffs and rocks back and forth). You never let me take myself too seriously, did you? I’d get away with it with everybody else, but not with you. I’d be rambling on and on about something that was bothering me (slight smile crosses his face), and you’d just laugh. Not me. But you’d laugh. And all the sudden I’d realize that whatever it was that was driving me crazy was just a lot of nonsense. But if it was important, you’d listen. I can still see your face so clearly when you used to listen to me. So calm. So even. I guess that’s easy for me to remember, Beth, because you did a lot of listening, didn’t you?

(Starts to cry, voice breaking in the next sentence).

Nothing’s changed. I still talk all the time. (Sob pause). But you left, Beth, before you could show me how to do that for myself. Show me how to…get through all this. Oh. When I was with you, I always knew that there was a point. There was a reason for all this. But now…(voice cracking) Beth, you’ve been gone so long. (Gathering control of his emotions). So what is it? Tell me. Are you laughing? Or are you listening? Is this just nonsense?

(Starts to cry again).

I think…I think I have to say goodbye. (Looks down). I have to learn to do this for myself. I’ve got to keep myself in line Beth, because I’m hurting somebody else, and you would never stand for that. You wouldn’t like what I’m doing now, so I’ve got to stop.

(He pulls out her rose necklace (okay, so he doesn’t KNOW it’s the duplicate Alan had made to forge Beth’s death) and holds it toward the grave).

I saved this. It was the only thing left after the fire.

(He completely breaks down sobbing, putting his head in his hands. After a moment, still crying, he throws his hands up in hopelessness).

What am I supposed to do? Should I just forget? (Swallowing a sob) Because I don’t think I can. Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, and I’m not even up, I see that sketch. That first little sketch that you made in the hospital when I first met you. And if I remember that, Beth (reaching his hand toward the grave), how am I ever going to forget you?

(He puts his hand up to his eyes crying again. Chelsea enters, unseen to Phillip, and watches him at the grave as we go to a break).


(Chelsea, still watching Phillip, starts to cry and leave. Nick stops her).

Nick
Just a moment.

Chelsea
What?

Nick
A friend of mine, a Mr. George Bernard Shaw once wrote that, “Heartbreak is the end of happiness, but the beginning of peace.”

Chelsea (still crying)
Yeah, right. I’ve got to go.

Nick
Chelsea? Sometimes our eyes deceive us. Are you sure you should leave right now?

Chelsea
Excuse me. (She turns to leave and stops). How did you know my…name.

(She turns around, but Nick is gone. Confused, she takes one more look at Phillip and leaves).

Phillip (Still talking to the grave)
I guess if I can remember the first picture you ever drew, (looking down at the necklace) I don’t really need this to remember you by.

(He puts is down on the ground in front of the grave. He continues earnestly).

I have to say goodbye, Beth. Don’t I? (Looking up at the sky). Sometimes, I feel you so strongly. Like you’re still out there somewhere. Beth, if you are, please let me go. (Pleads). Please. Say goodbye to me too.

(The camera stays on Phillip as Nick starts reciting a passage from Corinthians (with a few changes). Phillip slowly smiles a bit.)

Nick
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.
And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing
Charity suffereth long, and is kind. Charity, envieth not; charity vaunteth not, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, is not easily provoked.
Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth.

(Nick enters the scene, and Phillip turns to look, as we go to a break).


(Nick walks down to Phillip. Phil stands up).

Phillip
Nick, you came.

Nick
Well, I couldn’t miss my annual visit, now, could I?

Phillip
And you knew where to find me.

Nick (Nods)
Mm-hmm. Apparently.

Phillip (Looking back at the grave)
I came to say goodbye, Nick. (Quietly). It’s hard. Sometimes I feel like she’s not really gone.

Nick
Aw, no one is gone when people remember them. Especially the way you remember her.

Phillip
Don’t you think that’s wrong?

Nick (Shaking his head)
I don’t think you have a choice.

Phillip (Nods, then changes gears, wiping the snow off Nick’s coat)
Nick. That’s the same coat you had on last year.

Nick (Looking down at it)
That’s right.

Phillip
Do you need some money?

Nick
No, I don’t need anything.

Phillip (Pause)
Who are you?

Nick
Beth never had to ask, did she?

Phillip
No, she never did. (Smiles) Of course, I never stopped asking, did I?

Nick
It’s cold out here. Don’t you have some place to go?

Phillip
Yeah, I do. I’ve got to find somebody.

Nick
Yes.

Phillip (Turning back to the grave)
You know, Nick? I think she’s always going to understand things a lot better than I do. But Chelsea’s alive. And so am I. And I think that means that I have to go on, whether I screw it up or not.

Nick
Sounds like you two had a nice long talk.

Phillip
Yeah, we did. (Turning back to the grave again). I told her that I love Chelsea. God help Chelsea. But I do love her. So I have to go. That’s right, isn’t it Nick? That’s what Beth would say…

(He turns around and Nick is, typically, gone. He starts to look around).

Nick? Nick?

(He starts to laugh, and goes back to the grave).

Are you laughing at me? Yeah, I think maybe you are. (Pause). Merry Christmas.