Cold Hunter


Salty gray mist hovered over the rocky New England shore. Crested waves broke against the wet rocks, spraying up foam and water. The beach was made up of smooth pebbles, crushed shells, and fragments of boulder, all entwined by the slimy seaweed that would cling and rot, loosening the decaying sea scent that is particular to those cold ocean beaches.

A pair of old sneakers carefully winded their way through the rocks towards the breaking shoreline. The figure wore dark baggy pants and a worn, but thick sweater. A slim hand pushed a strand of loose white hair from the pale face. Her eyes closed as she breathed in the chilling ocean air.

She was young and in her twenties. The young woman lived about an hour away in the city. She came here to escape the vigor of urban life and to reflect and meditate in this cool unconfined sanctuary. Eyes scanned the familiar misty terrain composed of liquid and rock. Then she saw the bottle in front of her.

It was half buried in the mud, obviously sent in from the morning tide. Curious, she walked over to it. With wary fingers, she pulled it from the oozing mud and gray pebbles. There was a cork stuck in the opening. Gingerly brushing off the mud, she saw there was also a piece of paper inside. Intrigued, she uncorked the top. It made a muffled pop as she pulled it off. Nimble fingers gripped the paper and pulled it out. Gently unrolling it, she saw it was a letter, dated from eleven months before.
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Rogue,
I never got a chance to tell you that I'm sorry. After you left, I was angry. I thought I hated you. And I guess I did hate you. The same time I loved you. I hated you for leaving me. For leaving all of us. For them. The ones who always looked down on us. I saw you as a traitor. You'd betrayed us, and it hurt me. I thought I would never get over it. I didn't realize it then, but you'd broken my heart. But I got over it. I put up a wall and forgot about you. I moved on.

I focused on my family. I focused on other girls. You must have seen some of them. I even went after one of your own member. I don't know what I saw in that girl, exactly. I'd known Kitty from our old school, but there was no particular connection between us. I thought I liked her then, but maybe, subconsciously, I thought that by getting close to her, I would get close to you. Or maybe I thought it would hurt you. But then again, I didn't believe you could feel. After all, you'd left, hadn't you? Left something special we'd shared. More than just special though. I loved you. I didn't even know about love then. I'd never loved before. You were the first person I felt this way towards, and it was real.

I knew it that first time we were together. And for the first time, I let my guard down. I'd spent eighteen years locked inside myself and you somehow found the key. Of course, then you took what I'd locked up and threw it into fire. You'd left. Leaving behind hatred and bitterness. After a while, I learned to channel it in certain ways. I could focus it on my power and I got stronger. There's nothing like the feeling of adrenaline surging through your body to make you break loose. And nothing unleashes it better than deep boiling hatred. Because that's what I felt for you. Hatred.

The little love that was left, that didn't turn to hatred, I gave to my family. The three other boys you'd also cruelly abandoned. They were all I had now. And I loved them, took care of them, gave them something to ground themselves on. I'd never had that, but I wanted people I loved to have it. So I gave it to them. In giving them love, I learned to love myself. I was still bitter, but my priorities were elsewhere. And for the first time, I was happy. I didn't think about you anymore, but an invisible needle still poisoned my heart, unbeknownst to me.

Two years passed. You turned eighteen. I was already twenty, going to college, and holding down two jobs. Todd still had a year left in school. Fred had a job and took a few night classes after I pushed him to do it. Pietro was gone. He skipped town after graduation and got lost in the big cities. I guess Bayville was too small, too smothering, to hold him in. You were like Pietro. You had to get out. You were eighteen then, this young insecure girl. And you needed to grow. You came to my house to tell me. It had been two years since you'd lowered yourself by coming there. I could only stand in the doorway, thinking how beautiful you were, at the same time that I cursed and screamed at you. I was over you, but I never thought you would really leave. You left my house screaming and crying. I didn't cry, but I was shaking inside.

I closed the door with my heart on fire. The hate and anger I'd suppressed over the years came flooding back. You consumed my mind again. This time, you never disappeared. I couldn't shake it. So after Todd graduated and I knew that him and Fred would be okay, I left Bayville.

I drifted for a while. Went everywhere and did everything. Went all the way out to California and down into Cancun. I went back to Chicago, my hometown. I had fun and my journey was aimless. The fast life consumed me, and subconsciously, I searched for you. Sitting in bars and clubs, I kept my eyes peeled for a certain goth girl. I hadn't seen you for a while and I knew you'd probably changed, but I knew I would recognize you. When I was in bed with a girl, I would fantasize it was you I held in my arms. I dated girls who had your traits. Brown hair, a southern accent, black lipstick, a bad attitude. None of them lasted long. I did this for several years. But I couldn't spend my life following an impossible dream. I couldn't hunt for something I would never find. I was twenty-five. It was time to grow up.

I returned to Bayville. I went back to college. I'd dropped out junior year. I graduated and got a job. Now I own a car dealership. Ten years had passed since I'd moved to Bayville and met you. I'm twenty-eight now. There's a woman in my life that I've been with for seven months. I'm thinking of marrying her. She's got blonde hair and blue eyes. She has a heart of gold and loves to laugh. And I think I love her.

I don't have to worry about my family now. Fred's married. Who would've ever thought that he would be the first of us to get married? He's got a cute baby girl, about sixteen months old. Todd's doing all right too. He's working for the FBI. That's an ironic career change I never saw coming. But he's a good kid. Grew a lot since you last saw him. I don't think you would recognize him now. After I came back, that bullied teen I knew no longer existed. I think he turned out the best from the four of us.

Only one I'm not sure about is Pietro. He still lives the fast life, and I don't know if he'll ever quit. He has money. I'm not sure how. But there's this anger and hatred inside him. I saw him a couple months ago. I guess you never knew this, but Magneto was his old man. Shortly after you left Bayville, his sister came to town. That surprised me. I never even knew he had a sister, and Pietro usually told me everything. That's how I found out about Magneto. Then other stuff happened. Something that involved Evan Daniels as well. I'm not sure exactly what. But afterwards, Pietro, Wanda, and Daniels all left town. I haven't heard anything since about the latter two, but I think they left together. I tried to talk to Pietro about it, but you know him. He's the only one I worry about. I hope he'll be okay. But a part of me isn't sure. I have no idea where he is now, and I feel like I'm never going to see him again. Our last meeting didn't go that well.

But overall, I'm okay now. A day doesn't go by that I don't think about you. But the hatred's gone and I'm at peace with myself. I have a woman I love in my life. Most of my family's okay. And I'm happy. When I look back on our love, I see it as something irreplaceable. But I like my life now.

My only regret is that I never told you that I loved you and I should have. I don't know if it would have changed anything between us, but I should have said something. I haven't seen you in eight years and I wonder if I ever will. I can't even imagine what you look like now. When I think of you, I remember that sixteen-year old girl I loved. But I know you're twenty-six. I need to let go of you though, which is why I'm writing this letter. It's my last attempt to reach you as well as my final farewell.

Do you remember that one time we drove to the beach? It was just the two of us, right after you moved here. That was our best memory. We were walking along the beach, hand in gloved hand, and then we saw those pebbles. They were perfectly identical and opal-colored, right on the shifting line where the sand and water would meet. It seemed that Fate had left them there for us. And we both took one in memory of our love. I still have mine. I'm holding it in my hand as I write this. I'm going to put it in the bottle when I'm done though.

I need to move on permanently, but not before I tell you this. I love you, Rogue. I loved you then. I loved you when I hated. I searched for you when I was lost. I love you now, despite this other woman in my life. I don't think I'll ever see you again. Even if I did, I don't know what would happen because we've both changed so much. Maybe it's better this way though. Because even though it all ended badly, we had something so unreal and perfect, and I want to be able to remember that. I wonder if you know this, and I hope you do. Maybe you're reading this right now and you love me too. It's a distant dream, and I'm a realist. But somehow, I hope you'll know. I hope you're happy. I hope you're safe. I'm sorry I never got to tell you that I loved you. I've moved on in life and I try not to look back. But I'll never forget you, Rogue. And I'll always remember you.


Love,
Lance
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The slim hands that held the thin sheet of paper trembled slightly. One hand brushed a salty tear from the pale face. She breathed deeply, trying to control the well of emotions that were threatening to overflow within her. The emerald green eyes closed, then opened. She bent down and picked up the bottle she'd placed at her feet, then slowly, hesitantly, turned it upside down.

A smooth white pebble slid into her open palm. She stared at it. It was polished and oval, after spending hundreds of years being washed by the watery waves. For several moments, there was only silence. The waves pounded rhythmically and the ocean breeze steadily whistled. After some hesitation, one hand reached under the neckline of her sweater and pulled out a gold chain underneath. On it was a white stone, identical to the one in her opposite palm. With trembling fingers, she removed the necklace from around her throat, placing the two stones next to each other. Wet eyes stared up at a gray sky, then across the moving waters. The two separated beings were finally together again. The tears flowed freely now in silent cascades. The waves continued to break and spray on the shore. A seagull squawked nearby. The pale hand closed around the two stones. She held them close to her heart as tears poured down her face. Then, in a soft murmur, swallowed up by the sound of moving water and crashing waves, Rogue whispered, "I love you too, Lance."