Chapter 1: A Christmas Carol
NOTE:
In this fic I have rewritten history a little. Shuis still have not admitted
their feelings and the shooting/burial stuff never occurred. Also Martin
Fitzgerald is indeed dead.
Chapter 1:
Sheridan stood in the doorway and watched as Luis moved around her living
room, haphazardly tossing his belongings into his bag. "You certainly are in
a hurry." She remarked dryly, arching an eyebrow as he glanced at her over
his shoulder.
"Well, now that the FBI has released me as your body guard there isn't much
reason for me to hang around I guess." Luis used his much practiced technique
at hiding his real thoughts on the matter. "Besides," he added, "It's
Christmas Eve... I'm sure we both have family stuff to take care of."
Sheridan nodded. "Yes, I'm sure you're anxious to spend the holidays with
your family. Pilar will be so happy to see you."
She would be spending
tomorrow alone most likely. Oh, Ethan would put in an appearance, but there
was no way she was subjecting herself to the farce of a celebration that
would take place at the mansion.
Luis gave her a little smile and a nod. He noticed she had avoided mentioning
her family and he knew her Christmas wouldn't be very merry. He wished he
could invite her home with him. He knew she would love the family Christmas
that the Lopez-Fitzgeralds had... besides he would be able to spend the day
with her... He shook his head, dragging his thoughts back to reality.
'There's no way she would want to spend any more time with you anyway...
she's glad to get rid of you' he thought.
"Well, I'm all packed." He zipped up his bag and turned to face her. She
appeared deep in thought and it took her a moment to respond.
She offered him a weak smile. She really didn't want him to go and it had
nothing to do with the fact that she would no longer have a body guard.
"Luis... I want to thank you for everything you've done for me. I know this
wasn't an easy assignment for you... and that it was one that you really
didn't want to take."
'Yeah, it wasn't easy,' he thought. 'It's been murder protecting her and
keeping my distance' "You don't have to thank me Sheridan, it's my job."
'Right, his job.' She thought sadly. "Well, I'm going to thank you anyway. I
mean, I am still breathing so you did a great job..."
"Yeah, well, you're welcome." He looked at her standing there and wished with
all his heart that he didn't have to leave her there. She had a strange look
on her face and he realized she must be nervous about being alone after
having a guard so long. "You know, you have nothing to worry about. The FBI
wouldn't have released me if you were still in any danger."
"I know Luis. I'm fine." Sheridan forced a smile and tried to look like she
was fine. This was good. He thought she was upset about the danger to her...
he would never realize it was not the bodyguard she wanted to keep, but the
MAN.
Luis picked up his bag and shuffled it from hand to hand awkwardly. "Um, I
guess I'll go..." He moved toward the door and gave her a weak smile. "Have a
good holiday Sheridan."
"You too Luis. Have a Merry Christmas." She waited until he was gone before
she allowed her tears to fall. "Why?" She whispered. "Why couldn't he care
for me... just a little bit?"
Luis drove the Jeep down the driveway, using every ounce of restraint to stop
himself from turning around and going back to her. "She doesn't want you
there man... she's only nervous about being alone. She never wanted you there
from the start." He told himself angrily. "It would never work anyway...
she's a Crane. Even if she was attracted to you, which she's not, she'd never
be able to give up her lifestyle."
He snapped on the radio in an attempt to drown out his thoughts. The song
ended and a new voice began to croon an old holiday tune... "I'll Be Home For
Christmas". Luis was going home for Christmas to be with his family. So why
did he feel like every second he drove he was leaving 'home' farther and
farther behind?
Sheridan spent the evening trying not to feel too sorry for herself, but it
was a futile effort. She called the woman that ran the community center and
made sure that the gifts and food she'd donated had been distributed. They
had and she hung up, knowing that at least a few families would have a nice
holiday because of her.
She fiddled with the already perfect decorations on her tree, moving them
aimlessly around for something to do just to keep her hands busy. Finally she
couldn't stand it any longer and she locked up the house, turned off the
lights and went to bed. The earlier she went to bed, the sooner tomorrow
would come and go.
Sleep was elusive, however, and once in her dark bedroom with her head
nestled on the fluffy pillow her thoughts ran rampant. Only after almost two
hours of reliving the moments spent with Luis did she fall into a restless
sleep.
Luis' evening was very different, but no less painful. The house was filled
with his family and their friends. Pilar had thrown a small party, with the
Bennetts and the Russells. There was plenty of noise, laughter and pleasant
conversation, but Luis couldn't enjoy it.
His thoughts drifted to Sheridan. She was the person he wanted to be with
tonight... the only thing missing from a perfect Christmas eve.
He was thankful when the company left and his family went to bed. Luis
wandered about the house, coming to stand in front of the window. He looked
out into the night. It was cold and there was not yet any snow. It wasn't a
very Christmassy kind of night really.
He wondered what she was doing. "One
things for sure," he muttered. "She's sure as Hell not thinking about you."
With that he turned out the lights and went to his room. Once in bed he lay
there for a while, trying to force her out of his head. Finally he fell
asleep, halfway through the process of counting the tiles on his ceiling.
Sheridan slept fitfully, coming half awake to the realization that she wasn't
alone in her room. She could sense someone behind her, but she wasn't scared.
She knew, somehow, that she wasn't in danger. She rolled over and a small
gasp flew from her lips as she saw her mother sitting in the chair beside the
bed. "Mother..." she whispered.
"Hello Sweetheart." The beautiful woman replied. She was ethereal in
appearance, almost solid, but yet still wispy and a bit translucent. She was
a ghost.
Sheridan got slowly out of bed and moved toward the chair. "Mother... is it
really you?"
"Yes Sweetheart... it's me. I've come to talk to you about your life."
Sheridan reached the chair and her hand came out to shakily touch her mother.
Her hand passed through the ghost, feeling strangely cold and damp. Sheridan
gasped again and took a step back. "Uh... my life? What about my life?"
Although she was nervous she still wasn't afraid, but she was terribly
confused.
Her mother smiled. "Darling, I have watched you over the years... your every
move. It saddens me to see you so unhappy. I kept telling myself that you
would find happiness... that you would eventually have the life I always
dreamt for you."
Sheridan felt tears burn in her eyes. "I've tried Mother... I want to be
happy. It just... well it's not meant to be."
"Foolishness." Her Mother said firmly. "Of course it's meant to be. You just
need to open your eyes and see what's right under your nose."
"Under my... oh, you mean Luis? No, Luis is not what's meant to be. He
doesn't even like me very much. He thinks I'm a spoiled pain in the behind."
She waved her hand in the air, dismissing the idea.
"But you love him." The statement was matter-of-fact.
Sheridan turned to her mother and couldn't lie. "Yes, I love him, but it's
totally one sided. There is no chance for us."
The ghost sighed. "I knew that's what you would say and I also know I am not
going to be able to change your mind. You will have to see for yourself."
"See for myself?" Sheridan turned away and put her head in her hands. This
was too much to handle.
"Yes... you will have other visitors tonight. They won't hurt you and you
needn't be afraid. Listen to them Sheridan... please. Your happiness depends
on it."
Sheridan turned to question her further, but the chair was empty. "Oh
Sheridan," She scolded herself, "You are losing it here. You need to get a
grip. You did not just see the ghost of your mother."
She laughed a little and crawled back into bed. Enough foolishness... she was
sleep deprived and under stress from the holidays, that's all. She closed her
eyes and willed sleep to come.
Luis got out of bed and went to get some water. When he returned with the
drink he saw something in the corner of his room. The glass slid from his
hand, sloshing water all over his legs and feet, and landing harmlessly on
the carpet. "Papa?"
Martin Fitzgerald stepped into the center of the room, oddly luminescent in
the dark room. "Hello Son. Close your mouth... you aren't dreaming."
Luis forced himself to draw air into his lungs. His father was standing here
in his room... as a ghost, but still. "Papa, I never thought I'd see you
again..."
"It's good to see you too Son. I've been watching over you, but it's better
up close." He smiled at Luis and continued. "I'm a little disappointed in you
Son."
"Disappointed?" Luis wondered what he'd done. He was a good, honest man.
"Yes. You're letting your chance at happiness slip away Son." He moved to sit
on the edge of Luis' bed.
Luis noticed, with a little discomfort, that the bed never shifted as the
figure sat down. He really was a ghost... "What do you mean Papa? I'm happy.
I have a good job and my family. Life is good."
Martin scowled and shook his head. "Don't be a fool Son. You know what I
mean. I'm talking about Sheridan Crane."
"Sheridan Crane is not my chance at happiness. It's an impossible situation
even if she was interested, which she's not." Luis said the words forcefully,
trying to convince himself as well as the spirit.
"You always were a stubborn, hard-headed kid." Martin said, but not in a
malicious tone. "You will have to be shown the way things are I suppose."
Luis looked at his father suspiciously. "What do you mean?"
Martin smiled cryptically. "You'll see... just heed the warnings... ok Son?"
Luis closed his eyes and shook his head trying to clear his mind. "What
warnings?" The words fell on an empty room, because when he opened his eyes
his father was gone.
If he was every really there. "I'm going crazy..." Luis mumbled, as he
climbed back into bed, his water forgotten. He rolled over and went back to
sleep.
To Be Continued...