School Daze
Chapter 26:
“Luis,” Sheridan giggled. As the man in question placed tiny kisses on her neck. “That tickles,” she laughed lightly. Squirming out of his grasp. He grinned at her. A devilish glint in his dark eyes. “Tickles, huh? Why Ms. Crane…what are your other ticklish spots?” he asked. Advancing on her. His hot breath on her neck as he leaned in closer to whisper in her ear. She turned scarlet with his softly spoken words. And trembled when he pressed her body up against her cottage door. Engaging her lips in a teasing kiss.
“Luis?” she whispered breathlessly. Unable to stop herself. “Would you like to come in?” she squeaked as he caressed her sides. Slowly. Tantalizingly. Great Sheridan, she scolded herself. Sound desperate much? Luis grinned at the _expression of complete mortification on her face. He’d never seen anything more adorable. He cupped her jaw in the palm of his hand and gave her a sweet, lingering kiss on the lips. He reached his other hand past her and started fumbling with the door knob. “Dammit,” he muttered softly against her lips in frustration.
He pushed harder against the door. But still it would not give. He soon forgot all about it, though, as Sheridan tangled her hands in his hair and pulled him closer. He felt his back hit the door, and his dark eyes widened in shock. Wow, was the only thought he could manage. The lady could kiss like nobody’s business. And as much as he loved it…he didn’t want things to get too carried away. “Sheridan,” he gasped. A finger against her lips. “You don’t know what you’re risking. Kissing me that way,” he said seriously. “Luis, I…Luis!”
“Ouch!” he yelled. Rubbing his head in agony. “What the hell happened?” he asked. “Oh my god! I’m so sorry! Did I kill you? I didn’t kill you, did I?” a frantic voice babbled. “9-1-1! That’s it. I have to call 9-1-1.” He rolled his eyes. The voice could only belong to one person, and Sheridan confirmed his suspicions when she giggled, “Theresa! What are you doing here? And why are you dressed like Catwoman?” “Catwoman!” he exclaimed in surprise. Whipping his aching head around to take a better look. Instantly regretting it. “Luis,” Theresa trembled. “Don’t get the wrong idea. But I hid in your car when you drove over here for your date,” she rushed. “I went inside the Mansion, Ms. Crane,” she said. Pleading to a more lenient jury. “And Mr. Crane was so nice. Showing me around. He even took me to his room.”
“He took you to his room!” Luis bellowed. Sheridan imagined she could see the windows rattle with the force of his disgust. And anger. She placed a calming hand on Luis’s arm. But he didn’t seem to notice it. Theresa plowed ahead. Undeterred. “Then I went into Ethan’s room. I heard the shower running, and I sat down on the bed to wait for Ethan. I wanted to tell him how much fun I had the other day. And give him this,” she said. Producing one of Kay’s hideous tee-shirts. “I thought he might like to keep it as a souvenir. Ms. Crane? Are you alright?” she stopped mid-breath. When Sheridan choked. Desperately trying not to go into hysterics.
“Anyway,” she continued. “I heard…I found out Ms. Hotchkiss was with Ethan,” she said. Disappointment in her voice. “I got scared and hid. The next thing I knew…Ms. Hotchkiss was screaming. And Mr. Crane come running. Then Mrs. Crane burst through the door with a baseball bat and hit Mr. Crane over the head with it. It was so awful,” she said. Fat tears spilling out of her big brown eyes. “And then when he woke up and called her ‘Catwoman’, she hit him again. Ethan was so upset. I just wanted to go up to him and hug him,” she sniffled. Luis shook his head. Getting to his feet. “I was too afraid. Mrs. Crane swung that bat hard,” she said with wide eyes.
Sheridan couldn’t help her laughter. She was concerned about her brother. But Ivy had wanted to do something just like Theresa had described for YEARS. She finally sobered long enough to ask, “Did they go to the hospital?” “Ethan and Mr. Hotchkiss took him. But Mrs. Crane didn’t go. I had to escape out Ethan’s window,” she said. “I’ve been hiding in your cottage ever since. You aren’t mad, are you?” she asked hesitantly.
“No, Theresa. I’m not mad,” Sheridan reassured her. “But you don’t have to sneak into the Mansion. Just call first.” To give everyone fair warning. “Oh! Thank you so much!” she squealed excitedly. Nearly knocking her down with her exuberant hug. Sheridan winced as Theresa’s cast covered arm bumped the side of her head. “Oh my gosh! I didn’t hurt you, did I?” “Theresa!” Luis exclaimed in exasperation. “What?” she asked cluelessly. A smile blossoming on her lips as she watched Luis tend to Ms. Crane. She sighed blissfully. Proof that FATE existed.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Luis whispered. Smoothing a hand over her hair. Staring into Sheridan’s twinkling blue eyes. “Yes,” she laughed. “But I’m not sure for how long,” she smiled. Glancing at Luis’s giddy teen sister. “You know what we talked about earlier tonight?” he grinned. She nodded her head in comprehension. The smile on her face stretching wider. “I’m dying here,” he groaned. "Will all our dates end like this, Luis?" she teased. He chuckled in response. "God I hope not," he sighed. Resisting the incredible urge to kiss her. "I'll call you," he said. Waving in goodbye. "Theresa," he called. And she watched 'til Luis's car disappeared from sight. Leaning back against the door and closing her eyes. Coming back home was proving to be the best thing she had ever done.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 27:
“Whit!” Theresa squealed. Racing down the hall. “Theresa! Watch…” Theresa plowed over Charity without a second glance. Whitney groaned. “Out,” she finished. “Oh Whit,” Theresa bubbled. Swinging her cast covered arm around excitedly. “I have the best news! Guess what this is?” she squealed in delight. Whitney rolled her eyes. “Ethan Crane’s lunch menu?” Her sarcastic question didn’t even faze Theresa. “This is the list of nominees for Homecoming Queen.” “So,” Whitney said boredly after glancing at the list of names. “What’s so great about that?” “See that space at the bottom? That’s for write-ins, Whit. I am going to write myself in for Homecoming Queen! And I just know I’m going to win.”
“Theresa,” Whitney sighed in exasperation. “And just how do you plan on accomplishing this…this miracle?” Theresa grinned so big her face nearly split in two as she reached into her bookbag and pulled out a humongous stack of paper ballots. “Easy,” she boasted. “There’s 200 ballots here, Whitney.” “Theresa…No! That’s cheating.” “Aww. Don’t be such a spoilsport, Whit. I’m the most beautiful girl at this school. Not to mention the future Mrs. Ethan Crane. Who’s to say I wouldn’t win anyway? I’m just giving FATE a little helping hand. That’s all.” Then it’s not fate, you crazy, silly girl, she had the insane urge to say. Instead she kept her mouth shut. And said nothing. When did Theresa ever listen anyway? Case closed.
She could swear she saw Ms. Crane physically brace herself when she saw her and Theresa walking towards her. “Hi, Ms. Crane,” Theresa said breathlessly. “Here,” she said. Thrusting a handful of copies of the Homecoming ballots in her hands. “Give these out to everyone and tell them to vote for me.” “Um...okay,” Ms. Crane said slowly with a puzzled _expression on her face. Whitney glared at Kay when she twirled her finger around her head right in front of Theresa and mouthed “Nutso.” Ms. Crane turned beet red when Theresa asked cluelessly, “What’s that Kay?” “Neato!” Kay exclaimed in a monotone voice. “I’ll be sure to vote for you…in the contest for dumbest female alive,” she muttered under her breath. Only Whitney heard her. And this time…she couldn’t help but laugh herself.
The bell rang, and Theresa skipped happily down the hall. Leaving Whitney standing there. With a helpless _expression on her face. “There’s no one else like her, is there?” Ms. Crane said. Waving at her as she pulled the door to her classroom closed. “Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Gracious Almighty King!” she heard Kay shout. And a chorus of laughter echoed down the hall. She sighed and walked off toward the gymnasium. She had to discuss a few things with Daddy. On the way, she passed Miguel helping Charity to her feet. She shook her head as she noticed Charity limping down the hall. Another one bites the dust, she couldn’t help thinking.
“Chad!” she jumped in surprise when she opened the door to her daddy’s office and found him sitting behind his desk. “Whitney! Look…I’m sorry ‘bout sitting in your pop’s chair. Just ‘magining how it might feel to be in his place, you know?” Whitney smiled at him. “I thought you liked music, Chad.” “I do,” he answered with a grin. “But if that don’t work out…” “I’m sorry, Chad,” she laughed softly. “But I just can’t see you as a high school P.E. coach.” “Nah,” he chuckled. “Guess I can’t either. Coach Russell,” he said in surprise. “Me and Whit…your daughter was just talking. ‘Bout…nevermind. I’ll be out here if you need me,” he called over his shoulder as he walked out the door.
“Daddy,” she began in a rush. “I was wondering…I want to…Daddy, I want to take some time off from tennis. Concentrate on school. It’s my senior year, Daddy. And it’s almost half over. I’ve missed everything because I’ve been so busy with tennis. I…” “Whitney,” her father said quietly. Seating himself at the edge of his desk. “I expected more from you. Tennis is your future, Sweetheart. Not a couple of dances or football games in high school. I thought you understood that. That you and I wanted the same things. Whitney…you’re an excellent tennis player. You can go far. Be a success. Do all those things I wasn’t able to do.”
But that’s you, Daddy, she wanted to say. This is me. I want to be…I want to be normal. Have fun. Throw caution to the wind. Like Theresa. Whoa!!! Wait a minute!!! Not THAT far. I just want to enjoy my last year of high school. “Daddy…I…” “Coach Russell! Yo! Somebody’s here to see you,” Chad yelled. Her father walked over to her and pulled her into a hug. “We’ll talk about this later. Okay, Sweetheart?” “Okay, Daddy,” she whispered with a tiny smile. She sighed in resignation. She couldn’t let her daddy down. And she wasn’t going to, she decided. She was going to give it her all. For him.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 28:
Luis barely had time to knock on the door before Sheridan threw it open and pulled him into a passionate kiss. He kissed her back fervently. Slamming the cottage door shut and pushing her toward the sofa. “Wow,” he gasped breathlessly. “What was that for?” “Shut up and kiss me, Luis,” Sheridan panted. And Luis happily obliged. But then he remembered the flowers. “Sheridan,” he mumbled against her lips. “Sheridan…” “Argh! What now?” she groaned. “Luis,” she whined. “You’ve been out of town on a case for weeks. And I’ve missed…oh, Luis,” she said with a brilliant smile. “They’re so beautiful. Mmm. Sweet and sexy,” she purred. Tracing his lips with a brightly colored nail. “Beautiful,” he laughed. “Maybe before they were crushed. There’s something different about you,” he teased. “Sheridan? Are you sure Suzie’s spirit didn’t take over your body?”
Sheridan blushed scarlet and laughed softly. Luis grinned and lifted her chin with a finger to place a gentle kiss on her lips. “Aha! She’s still in there,” he said. Laughing when she punched him playfully. “Tsk, tsk, Ms. Crane. I thought you were more grown up than that,” he teased. Grabbing her in his arms and pulling her close. “Oh…I’m all grown up, Officer,” she whispered. Settling on his lap and placing her hands on his shoulders. Her blue eyes sparkling with happiness. “Yes, you are,” Luis answered. Cupping her cheek in the palm of his hand. He felt a strange sensation in his heart when she looked at him. With those incredible blue eyes. And kissed his palm sweetly before laying her golden head against his shoulder with a sigh. I’ve missed you, too, he thought as he stroked her back through the thin cotton of her top.
“Luis,” she giggled. Sometime later. “We’ve been sitting here like this for nearly half an hour. And as much as I’m enjoying it…” “Okay,” he laughed. Releasing her and watching her contentedly as she strolled out of the living room and into the kitchen. If he didn’t know better, he’d think he was…no. It was too soon. The woman was amazing. But they still had so much to learn about each other. Luis. Do you hear yourself, Buddy, he could almost hear Hank say. You’re making plans for the future, my friend. Whether you admit it or not. And you see Sheridan Crane in it. He did, he realized. Smiling at her as she came back into the living room carrying an assortment of cartons. “I know you said you didn’t care much for Chinese food,” she said. Biting her lip nervously. “But…you’ve never had it Sheridan style,” she laughed. Setting everything down on the coffee table before them and picking up some chopsticks. “Hmm. Sheridan style,” he grinned. “I HAVE to try this.”
“I have a new appreciation for Chinese cuisine,” he teased. As she sat down beside him on the sofa after dinner. “So…what’s next on the agenda for this already memorable date?” “A movie?” she asked hesitantly. “If that’s too boring, we can go out. Do something else more exciting,” she babbled. “Sheridan,” he said. Hushing her. “A movie sounds great. Just not one of those sappy romances.” “I hate to break it to you, Luis. But those ‘sappy romances’ are all I own,” she revealed with a poker face. “Well…Ms. Crane,” he said in mock disappointment. “I guess this is where we part ways.” “Luis,” she smiled. “I’m kidding. I have all kinds of movies. Take your pick,” she said. Showing him a variety of choices. He finally made a decision. A compromise. But for the life of him, he couldn’t remember the name of the movie. Or the actors in it. Because he was too conscious of her warmth beside him. And when she curled up against him and fell asleep halfway through the movie, he stopped watching the film and started watching her.
“Lady,” he whiepered softly. Brushing her blond hair back from her face. “What are you doing to me?” he asked. Kissing her forehead and sighing as she snuggled deeper into his arms. He could hold her like this forever, he realized. And never get tired. His own lids drooped with fatigue as the closing credits scrolled across the black screen, and he switched the television and DVD player off. Plunging them into darkness. Except for the moonlight. “No,” she mumbled. When he tried to disengage himself. And leave her. “Luis,” she sighed in her sleep as he lifted her easily in his arms and carried her to her room. He pushed the covers back and lay her down gently. Caressing her cheek one last time and turning to go. Until he heard her soft whisper. So quiet he was afraid he had imagined it.
“Luis,” she repeated. Her blue eyes shining in the darkness. “Stay with me. Please,” she said sleepily. Looking like a little girl in her sleep rumpled clothing. At that moment, he realized he was a goner. She had him hook, line, and sinker. There was nothing he could do but comply with her wishes. And hold her ‘til the morning sun rose.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 29:
Pilar hummed softly under her breath as she walked the short distance from the Mansion to Sheridan’s cottage. A curious _expression on her face as she spotted Luis’s jeep in the driveway. Early visiting hours, she thought. Maybe he was just stopping by before he had to go into work this morning, she rationalized. Continuing on her merry way. She stopped when she heard Mrs. Crane’s almost frantic call. “Pilar! Pilar! I just have to talk to somebody. Oh Pilar,” she gushed. “It’s so awful.”
Pilar listened with half an ear as she turned the knob to the cottage door and pushed it open gently. That’s odd, she thought. Where ARE they? Maybe they were just enjoying a nice breakfast outside. She sighed wearily as Ivy continued to babble beside her. When was she going to learn? Sometimes she felt more like Ivy’s Mammy than her housekeeper.
“Yes, Mrs. Crane,” she said politely when Ivy questioned if she was listening. “Julian is having a fit, Pilar. Threatening to disown Ethan. Throw him out of the Mansion. Swears up and down he won’t put up with Ethan’s double life.” “Double life?” she asked. Her brows knitting in confusion. “A dress!” Ivy exclaimed. “A hooker’s dress and red high heels ten sizes too small for him, Pilar. Oh god,” Ivy moaned. Raising a hand to her forehead. Like she was going to faint. “My son is a cross-dresser. You don’t think Ethan’s gay, do you Pilar?”
“Mrs. Crane,” Pilar said calmly. “I’m sure you’re overreacting.” Although…Ethan had always had feminine tendencies as a child. No, she thought with a shake of her head. That was a product of too much coddling on Ivy’s part. Ethan was NOT gay. “And Sam is such a manly man,” Ivy sighed. Following her as she carried fresh towels to Sheridan’s bathroom. “Oh my god!” Ivy exclaimed. “Way to go Sheridan!” Pilar took one look at her son and Sheridan tangled in each other’s embrace and went ballistic. “DIOS MIOS! HAVE ALL MY CHILDREN FORSAKEN THEIR MOTHER?!?!
Luis shot straight up in the bed. Grabbing his gun from the nightstand and fumbling with the safety. And in the process…knocking Sheridan to the floor. Ivy winced at the thud she made. “Who’s there?” he yelled. Squinting against the bright morning sunshine. “Oh,” Sheridan moaned. “Dammit,” she grumbled. “This bed’s so hard,” she said. Rubbing the remainder of sleep from her blue eyes. “Ivy?” she asked. A hilarious, perplexed look on her face. “What’s wrong with Pilar?” she asked. Climbing to her feet with great difficulty and rubbing her sore muscles. “I think I know,” Luis said. Startling her. “Oh god!” Sheridan shrieked. “She thinks…she saw…oh god,” she screamed. Covering her beet red face with her hands. “This is almost as bad as getting caught making out with Matt whatshisface in the confessional booth by Sister Mary Agnes. It’s worse!” she groaned in mortification.
Luis smirked at her. Then burst into raucous laughter. “What’s worse than that?” “Worse!” Pilar yelled at the top of her lungs. “I’ll tell you what’s worse!” Luis—and Sheridan—cringed as she proceeded to give them BOTH a tongue-lashing in a few carefully chosen Spanish phrases. Ivy stood there. Slack jawed. New appreciation for her demure, almost saintly maid…er, friend. “Brava! Brava!” she clapped. A Cheshire grin on her face as Pilar finished her piece and whirled out of the room. She followed. But not before sticking her blond head back in the door and giving them a few words of her own. “By the way…congratulations, Sheridan. You are one LUCKY woman,” she swooned. “Tata.” Sheridan threw herself face first into her pillows and released a string of very unladylike words. While Luis lay back. His hands behind his head. A wide grin stretching across his face. “Wow! You are so bad, Ms. Crane,” he teased mercilessly. This was one incident he was NEVER going to forget.
To Be Continued....
Chapter 30:
“Whitney!” Theresa squealed. “I’m so glad to finally get this thing off,” she gushed cheerfully. You’re not the only one, Whitney thought. Ducking. Theresa was dangerous enough as it was. But that cast…the casualty list grew everyday. It was a mishap waiting to happen. “And it’s perfect timing, too. I can’t wait ‘til they announce that I’m Homecoming Queen.” Whitney sighed loudly. Picking up a magazine to thumb through while they waited for Theresa’s name to be called.
“Theresa. You are hopeless. HOPELESS, you hear? Who said you were going to win? You’re not even on the nominees list” Theresa’s dark brown eyes glazed over. Whitney groaned. Sure fire way to tell the girl was in Fantasy Land again. What was she saying? Theresa LIVED in Fantasy Land. “No…I’m not,” she giggled. “But I AM going to win. Just you wait and see.” You WILL see Whit. Scrawling Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald 289 times wasn’t easy when you only had one hand. But she’d do it again in a heartbeat. After all…she was just giving FATE a helping hand.
“Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald,” the nurse called. And Theresa sprang to her feet. Bouncing over to her. “That’s me,” she bubbled. The nurse eyed her warily over the rim of her precariously perched glasses. “Okay, dear,” she said in a rather condescending tone of voice. Then turned to Whitney and barraged her with questions. “How often does she have these manic episodes? Is she taking any medication? Has she…?” “Whoa! Wait a minute!” Whitney said. Barely keeping the laughter out of her voice. “She’s here to get her cast off,” she told the older woman. The woman’s green eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Really,” Whitney said in exasperation. Finally the woman took her word for it. But it took a lot of convincing. “Prozac,” ehe muttered as she walked away. Thank goodness her mother showed up.
“Alright, Theresa,” her mom said pleasantly. “I’ll get you set up, and Dr. Alba will be in shortly.” “Thank you, Dr. Russell,” Theresa beamed. Jumping off the exam table as soon as Eve was out of sight. “Do you think Ethan will come?” “Ugh!” Whitney exclaimed. Covering her ears. If she had to listen to another word she’d scream. Theresa rolled her dark eyes at her. Trying to pry her hands off her ears. Was the girl for real, she wondered as she watched Theresa animatedly detail her latest plan to snag Ethan Crane. Good thing she couldn’t read lips to save her life. The less she knew the better. But wait a minute…what was that strange, high-pitched beeping noise?
“Theresa!” she hissed. Glancing down and noticing the tube Theresa was standing on. That kind of looked like…”CODE BLUE! CODE BLUE!” she heard someone yell. Theresa truly was hazardous to the health of Harmony’s good citizens, she realized as she peeked around the curtain separating them from the next cubicle and witnessed the flurry of activity. “Ouch!” Theresa whined. Rubbing her elbow where it had hit the corner of the exam table when Whitney shoved her. “What was that for?” Whitney ignored her. How long was it before being Theresa’s best friend cost her her life?
“Hello, Miss Lopez-Fitzgerald,” Dr. Alba greeted in a monotone voice. “Lot of excitement going on next door, huh?” he asked with bland smile. “Time to rid you of this contraption,” he said. Inspecting Theresa’s cast. “Looks like you have yourself a fine collection of signatures here, young lady. Hmm. That’s interesting. There’s only ONE name on here. Ethan Crane. Who is he?” he asked curiously. Theresa raised a hand to her heart. Gasping in horror. “You don’t know who Ethan Crane is?” she trembled. “Oh,” she said. Shaking her head sadly. “He’s only the greatest man that ever lived.”
Dr. Alba arched a white brow at her and continued his handy work. “There you go,” he said in a pleased voice. “All done. Good as new.” Theresa was still in shock, though. The thought that someone, ANYONE, would not know the one and only Ethan Crane was almost too much for her. Whitney had never seen her so pale. But that was before…before Dr. Alba’s next words. “Everything seems to be in order. A little pale,” he smiled. “But that’s to be expected. You’ve worn that cast for weeks. And you’ll need to work a little…regain your strength. You’ll be fine,” he said kindly. Patting her on the arm. Obviously he had never met anyone like Theresa, Whitney thought. “Oh my god!” Theresa shrieked. Catching sight of her pale, scrawny arm. “Or not,” Dr. Alba recanted. As Theresa’s eyes rolled back in her head. And she passed out cold.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 31:
“Miguel says you’d think it was the end of the world or something,” Kay sneered. “Look at her, Simone. She’s dressed for a funeral. Watch this,” she said evilly. “Kay! Kay…don’t!” But it was too late, she thought with a sigh. Following after her like the good friend she was. “Hi, Theresa,” Kay said brightly. Voice dripping with saccharine sweetness. Her best imitation of Charity, Simone realized. Theresa couldn’t see it. But she was so laughing on the inside. “You got your cast off! That is such wonderful news! I bet you’re happy, aren’t you? Let me see,” she prodded. Grinning devilishly as she pulled at Theresa’s sleeve.
“No,” Theresa trembled. How Kay kept from rolling her eyes, Simone would never know. She knew she wanted to. “It’s fine,” Theresa said. Tugging her sleeve back down. “Really.” “Okay,” Kay laughed. Then you won’t mind if I do this,” she said. Gasping in mock horror at the sight of Theresa’s newly revealed arm. “Why…why…I don’t know what to say,” she said. Wow, Simone thought. Tears. Now who was the drama queen? “Don’t worry, Theresa,” she said in a falsely sympathetic voice. “It won’t always look so…so shriveled up and…it IS deathly pale, isn’t it?”
Fat tears spilled out of Theresa’s big brown eyes. “My life is over!” she shrieked. Rushing through the busy halls. And it had to be said…she was better than a professional hitman. “Maybe I should give her a list of people I don’t like,” Kay muttered. With a self-satisfied smile. “She is SO pathetic. It’s like Armageddon or something ‘cause her freakin arm looks like everybody’s does when they get their casts off. Ugh! I’m telling you, Simone. The girl is mental.”
“Kay Bennett. What have you done now?” Kay groaned and turned around to face the owner of that familiar voice. “Ms. Crane. Who? Me? Why I’m a perfect little angel. I didn’t do anything. I’m so offended,” she sniffled. Squeezing crocodile tears out of the corners of her dark eyes. “Where is she? Kay? Do you have to torture Luis’s sister everyday?” “Why not?” Kay shrugged. “It’s SO much FUN. And it’s Luis, huh? Oh Luis,” she swooned. “Miguel tells me his mom caught you and Luis in bed the other day,” she grinned. Delighted when Ms. Crane blushed a deep red hue.
“Nothing happened,” Sheridan sputtered. Off Kay’s disbelieving look, she groaned in frustration. “We had all our clothes on. WE DID NOT HAVE SEX!” she yelled. Kay burst into laughter. “Um…and now everybody knows it. How DO you do it? You’re truly extraordinary,” she smirked. Clapping her hands loudly. “Kay,” Simone hissed. Glancing around the hall. The ENTIRE student body was hanging on their very word. Plus a few nosy teachers. Suzie and Mrs. Croweley to name a couple.
Oh god, she thought to herself. Sheridan…you are in so much trouble. Mrs. Croweley doesn’t like you anyway. Suzie’s going to drive you nuts grilling you for details and telling you how crazy you are. And…ugh! She couldn’t take another tongue-lashing from Pilar. Who knew she had it in her? “Look Ms. Crane…I’m sorry,” Kay apologized. “But really. It’s written all over your face. You…oh my god! You don’t just want Miguel’s brother. You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” she said in surprise. “I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!” a bubbly voice exclaimed. “Oh, Ms. Crane,” Theresa squealed. Hugging her and squeezing every last drop of oxygen from her lungs. “You have to name your first child after me. The wedding! Oh my goodness! The wedding will be so beautiful. Oh…and Ethan! Ethan will be there!” “Ethan, Ethan, Ethan,” Kay mocked. “Somebody put US and HER out of our misery. She’s like the damn Energizer Bunny.”
To Be Continued...
Chapter 32:
“Luis! Luis! Luis!” Theresa squealed excitedly. “Theresa,” Luis squeaked. Prying her arms from around his neck and taking a good look at her. “Mija,” Pilar said sternly. “Did you sneak into the Crane Mansion again?” “No, Mama,” Theresa giggled. “Luis…don’t you have something you want to tell Mama?” Luis looked at her curiously. He groaned. Rubbing his chin tiredly as she launched into another one of her fantastical diatribes.
“Luis and Ms. Crane are getting married! And Ms. Crane is going to name their first child after me! Isn’t that wonderful?” she gushed. Kay rolled her dark eyes and muttered under her breath to Miguel. “I swear, Miguel…I wouldn’t be surprised if an autopsy revealed what I’ve suspected all along. Theresa has hot pink cotton candy for brains.” Miguel snickered. Rushing forward when he saw his mama raise a hand to her head faintly and stumble slightly. “Sheridan is pregnant?!?!”
“Mama! NO!” Luis said emphatically. “I swear, we didn’t…we didn’t…” “They didn’t do IT, Mrs. Lopez-Fitzgerald,” Kay piped up. Luis looked to her in shock. How the hell did she know? “Right, Ms. Crane?” she asked. Stepping aside and revealing a flushed cheek Sheridan. Oh god, Sheridan thought. I feel like I’m stuck in an episode of some soap opera. This is worse than an episode of that show on NBC. The hideously addictive one with the doll. So Luis and I haven’t made love. Does the whole world have to talk about it?
“Pilar,” Sheridan said quietly. So quietly Kay had to strain her ears to hear her. And strain her ears she did. This was good stuff. “Luis and I…he just held me. That’s all. NOTHING happened.” Luis released a huge sigh of relief when his mama finally smiled. Whew! They were going to have to be more careful in the future. Didn’t want anybody getting the wrong idea, he thought in disappointment. Remembering how good it felt to hold her warm body close through the night.
“Aunt Sheridan,” a male voice called. Good grief. Perfect recipe for disaster. Barbie wannabe practically vaulted in the air for joy. Her whole face lighting up like a mega-watt bulb when she heard Edumb’s voice. “Wait,” she shrieked. Racing down the hall to her room. “I have to look perfect. Dazzle him. Today might be the day he asks me to…” “THERESITA!!!” Pilar yelled in exasperation. “Hi, Pilar,” Gwen breezed. A teasing smile on her lips as she sashayed in the room and got a good look at Sheridan. Sheridan had told her EVERYTHING. But try as she might…she could NOT imagine Pilar lambasting anybody. Who knew there was a fiery Spanish temper behind the quiet, respectful demeanor?
“Hello, Pilar,” Ethan smiled. Kissing her on the cheek in greeting. And avoiding Luis’s brown eyes. Luis couldn’t wipe the tickled smirk from his face. The memory of Wonder Boy here in a dress, heels, and make-up still fresh in his memory. “Make yourself at home, Mr. Crane,” she said politely. Gesturing for him and Gwen both to take a seat. Gwen…now is not the time, Sheridan thought as Gwen practically chased her into the kitchen. “Sheridan,” Gwen grinned. “What is going on here? Details, details.” Are you sure you weren’t adopted, Gwen? You starting to sound an awful lot like Suzie.
“Spill it,” she said. Cornering her so she wouldn’t have any escape. “Alright,” Sheridan huffed. She had to tell somebody. “Half the student body knows about me and Luis being in bed together.” “What?! How!?” “Kay said something, and I blurted out that we didn’t have sex.” “Oh my god,” Gwen laughed. “How humiliating! I mean…I’m sorry,” she apologized when Sheridan glared at her. “Humiliating is right. And what’s even worse…Mrs. Croweley, the teacher that HATES me…she took great pleasure in reporting the embarrassing incident to Principal Reid. I was so mortified, Gwen. My non-sex life is the talk of the ENTIRE town, it seems,” she groaned. Plopping down tiredly in the nearest chair.
“Sheridan…this is where me and you have to have a talk. What the hell is wrong with you? You have one of the sexiest men in Harmony—probably in all of Maine—at your beck and call. And he just held you. Come on. I know you’re not Mother Theresa. What’s going on here? It’s obvious you like him. A lot, I might add. And…judging from the cute little grin on his face every time he looks at you, Sweetie, he more than likes you. What’s holding you back?”
“Gwen,” Sheridan sighed. Covering her face with her hands. “That’s the hold-up. I DO like him. Maybe too much. I’m afraid, Gwen. I don’t want Jean-Luc to happen all over again. That’s why I’m taking it slow with Luis. No matter how much I want to go in there and…” “Whoa! Wait a minute!” Kay said. Bursting through the door and covering her ears. “Virgin ears here.” Gwen laughed. “I’ll be leaving now,” she announced after getting a soda from the fridge. “Bye.” “Bye,” Gwen and Sheridan waved in unison. “Gwen…I have a BIG problem,” Sheridan admitted as soon as Kay was gone. Or at least they thought she was gone. “I think I’m falling in love with Luis.” “I KNEW IT!” “What am I going to do?” Sheridan said. Hiding her face once more. “What am I going to do?”
To Be Continued...
Chapter 33:
“You knew what, Kay?” Luis asked curiously. Oh my goodness, Kay thought. This was the PERFECT opportunity. She wanted so badly to blurt it out. And she was all set to do it. Until…”Kay! We have something very important to discuss. Right now,” Ms. Crane said. Kay looked into her blue eyes. Uh oh. She definitely meant business. Besides…she’d tortured Ms. Crane enough today. She’d save the rest of her energy for Theresa. “Let me guess,” she said. Arms crossed. “You don’t want me blabbing to lover boy that you’re in love with him.”
“No, I’m not,” Sheridan huffed. “Whatever! Denial ain’t a river in Egypt, Ms. Crane. I heard you with my own two ears.” “So you WERE eavesdropping,” Gwen piped up. Grinning broadly. “Come on, Sheridan. It’s not like it’s that big of a secret.” “Yeah, Ms. Crane,” Kay said devilishly. “You might as well wear a flashing neon sign for all your subtlety.” Gwen snickered. She liked this girl. She had chutzpah.
“Argh!” Sheridan screamed into her hands. “Will this day never end?” “Well…I guess a date’s out of the question,” Luis laughed. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said sheepishly. “I just thought you might want to go grab a bite to eat. Hang out,” he said hopefully. That’s it, Ms. Crane, Kay smirked as the older woman transformed right before their very eyes. Seriously…the woman was melting into a ball of mush. And she had the nerve to deny she was head over heels.
“I…I…” “She’d love to,” Gwen gushed. Shoving her forward into Luis’s arms. Laughing when Kay sent her a thumbs up behind Luis’s back. “Is that right?” Luis grinned. Tucking a strand of blond hair behind her ear. His fingers lingering on her soft skin. “Yes,” Sheridan breathed. Helpless to stop herself. You’ll both pay for this later, she thought. Glaring at Gwen and Kay as she followed Luis back into the living room to say their goodbyes.
“So…” Kay smiled. “I don’t think we’ve been introduced,” she said. Holding out her hand. “I’m Kay Bennett.” “Gwen Hotchkiss,” Gwen smiled. Shaking the teen’s hand. “Has she always been that way?” Kay asked curiously. “No,” Gwen answered thoughtfully. “She’s never had a world of confidence. But she wasn’t always so careful with who she gives her heart to. Guess that’s a product of having your heart trampled on one too many times.” “Man,” Kay whispered. “Makes me feel kinda bad for teasing her.” “Don’t,” Gwen smiled. “She’s needs that little push. I happen to think she and Luis are perfect for each other.”
“Well,” Kay sighed several minutes later. Glancing at her wristwatch. “Nice talking to you. But I have to be getting home. Guess I can’t torment the Fairy Tale Princess anymore tonight,” she said sarcastically. “Theresa?” Gwen laughed. Kay grinned. “A word of warning…the chick is psycho. I’m serious. She hears all these little voices in her head telling her FATE wants her to do all these crazy things. Not to mention she’s an accident waiting to happen. She’s singlehandedly taken 23 people out of commission this year alone. Last year the total was…um, 147. I think she’s subconsciously shooting for a new record. Run! Now! And take Dopey with you. Theresa’s more twisted than color tv,” she said in parting. Gwen was rendered speechless.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 34:
“Luis,” Sheridan laughed nervously. “You’re staring. What? Do I have something on my face?” Luis grinned at her. “As a matter of fact,” he said. Reaching his napkin out and wiping the corner of her mouth. “You do.” Oh god. You just can’t do anything right today, can you Sheridan? “Relax,” he said in a low voice. “It was just pizza sauce. Very nice look for you,” he teased. He loved how she got so embarrassed around him. It was too adorable. “And how long has it been there? You’ve been staring at me for almost half an hour now.” “Oh…only the last five minutes,” he admitted. Her mouth hung open in surprise. Only the last five minutes. That meant…
“Hi, Ms. Crane! Mr. Lopez-Fitzgerald!” Luis groaned inwardly. “Reese,” Sheridan smiled. “What a pleasant surprise.” Reese grinned at her and pushed his glasses back further on his nose unconsciously. “So…it’s true,” Reese said with a knowing smile. “You two ARE hot and heavy.” Reese didn’t have time to duck before Sheridan spit her soda out in shock. Luis couldn’t control his laughter. Reese took his glasses off. Squinting. And cleaned the dark liquid off his lenses. “Oh Reese,” Sheridan apologized. “I’m so sorry.” “It’s okay,” Reese waved her off. Beating a path out of there. “Luis! You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“It’s one of the things I lo…like about you,” he quickly amended. Sheridan’s heart leapt to her throat. Did he…was he about to say…”Oh,” she said softly. “Come on,” Luis said suddenly. Slapping a few bills down on the table and grabbing her hand. Pulling her forward. “Luis? Where are we going?” she asked. Out of breath from trying to keep up with his long stride. “The park? Luis…why the park?” “Shh,” Luis said. His voice laced with amusement. Placing a finger on her lips. “I…” “Sheridan. Just trust me. Okay?” “Okay,” she said softly. Nodding her head.
The Lighthouse. He’s taking me to the Lighthouse, she realized with a smile. Following him as he led her up the winding stairs. “Luis,” she gasped when they reached the top, and she saw the crests of the waves. The sun setting in the horizon. “It’s so beautiful,” she said in awe. “Yeah…it is,” Luis breathed. Not taking his eyes off her. “Thank you for bringing me here,” she said. Turning to face him. Laughing as the wind whipped her hair about her face. Her laughter died in her throat when she saw the way he was looking at her. “I’m going to kiss you now, Sheridan. Is that alright?’ Alright? Alright! Do you even have to ask? Please do, she thought. The blood rushing in her ears as she opened her mouth to say…
“Yes,” she said breathlessly. After another mind-blowing kiss. From yours truly. That’s it, Sheridan. Admit defeat. You ARE falling in love with the man. And there’s absolutely nothing you can do to stop it. Luis laughed at the _expression on her face. “Speechless again.” “Argh!” she screamed in frustration. “You love torturing me, don’t you?” “Why yes, I do,” he teased. “You are too easy,” he chuckled. Wrapping his arms around her waist from behind. “Why did you bring me here, Luis?” ehe asked curiously. Several minutes later. Nestled safely in his arms.
“I wanted to show you something that I love. Help you get to know me better.” A smile played on her lips as she said, “Tell me more about yourself, Luis.” I want to know everything, she thought. But didn’t say. “Well…” he laughed. “I’ve lived in Harmony my entire life. With my family. I went to Harmony High. Did reasonably well.” “Reasonably well,” she scoffed. “Luis…I work at Harmony High now. I’ve seen all the trophies and plaques with your name on them. Reasonably well my ass.” “And what a fine one it is…ouch…sorry. You set yourself up for that one,” he laughed. Resting his chin atop her head. And staring out at the ocean below.
“What do you want in life, Luis?” “The same things everybody wants, I guess,” he sighed. “A house of my own one day. Filled with children,” he grinned. “And a beautiful wife who loves me just as much as I love her. There’s more, of course. But you get the picture. And you? What do you want out of life, Sheridan?” The same things as you. “A family of my own. Love,” she said wistfully. “That’s all?” “That’s all,” she said softly. Pinning him with her blue gaze. “Why so surprised, Luis? All I want are the simple things. I’d give every cent of the money I have up for the happiness I’ve dreamed of my whole life. Every cent.”
“You would, wouldn’t you?” he asked. Cupping her jaw in the palm of his hand. And coming to a not-so-surprising realization. The funny feeling he got in his chest…the way his heart literally soared at the sight of her beautiful smile…it was the beginnings of love. “Yes,” she said simply. Her eyes fluttering shut as he leaned closer and closer. Sighing with pleasure when his lips touched hers gently. His fingers threaded through her hair. In a heartbeat, she thought. Sinking deeper into him. In a heartbeat.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 35:
“Oh my goodness, Whit! I can’t wait ‘til they announce the results for Homecoming Queen! I just know I won!” Theresa squealed happily. “Can you imagine, Whit, how beautiful I’ll be with that tiara on my head?” Whitney bit her tongue. What good was it going to do anyway? “Whitney!” Theresa shrieked. Whitney winced. “What?” she asked hesitantly. “What is it now, Theresa?” “I forgot all about the Homecoming Dance,” she rushed. “Oh my…what am I going to do? What if Ethan isn’t able to make it?”
WHAT are you talking about? “Ethan? Theresa,” she sighed. “Ethan’s 24 years old. I’m sure the LAST thing he wants to do is attend a HIGH SCHOOL Homecoming dance. Besides…what about Gwen?” Theresa just giggled. “Gwen’s not invited, Whitney. This is MY night. She’ll…she’ll just have to get over it.” “I don’t know why I even bother,” Whitney groaned. “You’re hopeLESS.”
“Tell me something I don’t know,” Kay smirked. Popping up from out of nowhere and making Whitney jump. “You know, Whitney. I always did wonder how you’ve stood her this long. Aren’t you afraid for your life?” Kay said. Cringing as Theresa shoved the girls’ bathroom door open. Totally catching Jenn off-guard. “Oh my god! Oh my god! My nose!” she screamed in horror. “You broke it, dimtwit! Amy warned me about you,” she glared. Moaning pitifully. And hurrying down the hall to the nurse’s station. Her nose high in the air.
“I’m sorry,” Theresa said sheepishly. “Did you see that, Whit? I didn’t break her nose. She walked into the door all by herself,” she said with wide brown eyes. “Puh-leaze,” Kay rolled her eyes. “If you’ll excuse me. I’m not wearing the proper protective gear,” she deadpanned. Maybe you’re on to something, Kay, Whitney thought. This time Theresa plowed poor Principal Reid over. “Um…Miss Lopez-Fitzgerald,” he stammered. “I’ll be on my way now.” Theresa, she wanted to say. Even the Principal’s afraid of you. It was a lost cause. You know…in one ear. Out the other. Or maybe it got lost in what was apparently vacuous
space.
“Hey, Whitney,” she heard a voice call. “Your pops is looking for ya,” Chad grinned. “Says it’s important.” Thank you, she said. Lifting her eyes skyward. Even SHE needed a break sometime. “Thanks, Chad,” she smiled. Chad’s eyes followed her form until she disappeared through the doors at the end of the hall. “Oh…oh…oh,” Theresa squealed excitedly. Jumping up and down. “I know that look,” she gushed. “You’re in love with Whitney, aren’t you, Chad? This is so wonderful! We’ll have a double wedding! No…wait…make that a triple wedding. I just KNOW Luis is going to marry Ms. Crane!,” she bubbled.
What the @!#$%^@?!?! Chad didn’t know it was possible for someone’s face to be so…animated. “Girl…what are you smokin’? ‘Cause it must be some pretty good stuff.” “Huh?” Theresa asked cluelessly. Then continued. Full steam ahead. “Theresa! Theresa! Slow down. Take a breath. I’m…not…in…love…with…Whitney,” he said slowly. “Girl…you are TOO much,” he grinned. Theresa’s brown eyes widened. “Oh, Chad. I had no idea you felt that way about me,” she said. Laying a gentle hand on his arm. “But Chad…the ONLY man for me is Ethan. I’ll just die without him. I’m so sorry to break your heart like this. But it’s better you know now,” she said. Before leaving him there with his mouth hanging wide open. He chuckled under his breath. Priceless.
“Hi, Chad,” Ms. Crane said brightly. Passing him in the hall. “You are never going to believe this,” she laughed. “Jenn Foster had to drop out of the Homecoming race because she broke her nose.” Wonder how she got that, Chad wondered. Grinning despite his best efforts not to. “Too bad. Good thing she didn’t see the results yet. She won. But…her loss is Theresa’s gain.” “Man,” Chad laughed. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” “Uh huh,” Ms. Crane laughed. Her blue eyes sparkling. “It’s really amazing. Theresa had the second largest number of votes. 289 of them.
Everyone else is too close to call. Won’t she be surprised? See you later, Chad. Mr. Reid wanted me to announce these over the intercom.” Surprised. Hah! The girl was going to go crazy. Although…it could be debated that she was already halfway (who was he kidding? she WAS there) there. No debate needed, he realized minutes later when the results were announced. And the ONLY sound heard was Theresa’s voice. “YES! YES! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR VOTING FOR ME! YOU PICKED THE BEST PERSON FOR THIS PRESTIGIOUS HONOR!” Followed shortly by a voice distinctly Kay’s. “I GIVE UP! HARMONY REALLY IS THE TWILIGHT ZONE!”
To Be Continued...
Chapter 36:
“Mama!!! Guess what!” Theresa bubbled excitedly. “Wh…” “I WON HOMECOMING QUEEN! ISN’T THAT SO EXCITING!” “Ack!” Kay yelled. “My ears are bleeding. Somebody SHUT her up. Please. For the love of God. I’m begging you.” “TERROCITA!” “Oh my…did Pilar just call her own daughter…Miguel! She did,” Kay laughed. “Ouch,” Kay grumbled when Ms. Crane gave her a sound pinch on the arm. “What was that for? You know…you owe me big time for making me ride in the back seat with that twit. In a convertible no less. She had her head hanging out the side like a dog. You didn’t have to endure her whining about swallowing a damn bug. Well…if she hadn’t had her mouth wide open in the first place…” “Okay. Okay,” Ms. Crane said. Holding her hands up. “I’m sorry. If Pilar says yes to Theresa borrowing one of my nieces’ dresses for the dance, you can go along and pick one, too. Fair enough?” “Jewelry, too?” Kay bargained gamely. “A dress would be fine,” she said quickly.
“Sheridan,” Pilar said gravely. “Is what Theresita says true? Did she REALLY win Homecoming Queen?” “Mama,” Theresa squealed. Grabbing Pilar’s arm and squeezing the circulation out of it. “Don’t you believe me? I would NEVER lie to you.” Kay smirked when Ms. Crane’s golden brows shot up comically. “Yeah…like I believe THAT for a millisecond,” she muttered under her breath. “It’s true, Mama,” Miguel answered for her. “I saw the results myself,” Ms. Crane smiled nervously. Pilar’s arm almost looked…blue. “Well…I guess she does need a dress to wear. Are you sure…” “Pilar,” Ms. Crane said warmly. Practically wrenching Pilar’s arm from Theresa’s grasp and holding her hands in her own. “They won’t mind. They’d love to help out.” “Maybe Theresita should stay here. And you can pick something out for her.” Not a bad idea, Sheridan thought. It WOULD be safer that way. Against her better judgment, though, she said, “It wouldn’t be as special,” she said. Cringing inside when Theresa jumped for joy. What was she getting herself into?
“Wouldn’t be as special, huh?” Kay grumbled. “I’m NOT sitting in back with her again. Miguel…you do it.” Miguel grinned at them. “Can’t. Football practice. Other plans.” “Ugh! You! You’ll regret this,” Kay muttered. Stomping her foot in disgust. “Kay,” Ms. Crane placated. “She can sit in the back by herself.” “I’m ready, Ms. Crane,” Theresa gushed. A huge bag slung over her slender shoulder. “Um…Theresa? What’s with the bag?” “Oh, this?” Theresa smiled. “That’s my make-up bag. I have to do the full make-up to get the full effect. Don’t you think?”
O..k..a..y, Sheridan thought to herself. “Psycho Revlon Reject. No wonder she sleeps all the time in Lit class. Her eyelids are too heavy. Come on,” Kay encouraged. “You know you want to laugh. Go ahead and do it. She’ll never know you’re laughing AT her.” Sheridan bit her lip to the point of pain trying not to. But she couldn’t help the burst of hysterical laughter that blind-sided her when she saw Theresa gagging in the rear view mirror. “Hey Theresa,” Kay sneered. “You really should try out for the next Survivor. God knows you’ve eaten enough bugs today alone,” she finished. Mumbling under her breath.
“Would you look at her? Skipping. I think Pilar dropped her on her head when she was a baby.” “Kay,” Sheridan said. Shaking her head. “Never mind,” she said quickly. In what must have surely been a once in a lifetime occurrence, Julian had answered the door. And he was currently leering outrageously at Theresa. “Something about you looks familiar,” he grinned. “Julian,” Sheridan warned in a low voice. “This is Theresa. She’s a STUDENT at Harmony High.” “Jailbait,” Kay piped up. “Catwoman,” he exclaimed in shock. “Catwoman?” Kay mouthed. “Long story that I am NOT telling you,” Sheridan said. Ushering her inside.
“Theresa! Are you okay?” “Wow,” Kay said sarcastically. “What is that? A 2 second record?” “I’m alright, Ms. Crane. Really I am. I was just…” Looking at that new picture of Ethan. And Gwen. “Gwitch,” Theresa said in a low growl. “What did you say?” Sheridan asked incredulously. It sounded like one of two things. Neither of them good. “Oh, nothing, Ms. Crane,” Theresa said all doe-eyed. “My arm still itches sometimes,” she supplied. Frantically clawing at her arm. “Um…Theresa,” Kay smirked. “Wrong arm there, Einstein.:” “Ow. I’m going to report you to the proper authorities. Seems you take great pleasure in causing me physical harm.” “You wouldn’t dare,” Sheridan bluffed. Blue eyes flashing. “Would I?” Kay teased. Dark eyes sparkling with mischief. “AH!!!” “Theresa!” they exclaimed in unison.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 37:
“Gwen,” Sheridan apologized. Red-faced. “I am so sorry about what happened in there…I had no idea…” Gwen laughed. “I don’t think anybody knows what that girl in there is going to do next, Sheridan. Stop beating yourself up. How were you supposed to know she’d waltz into Ethan’s bathroom like that? I’m just glad Ethan wasn’t in the shower with me.” Sheridan laughed nervously. She didn’t buy Theresa’s story that she slipped on the wet floor and grabbed the shower curtain to keep from falling. Although…”So…they’re in there trying on Ethan’s sisters’ dresses. Alone. Does that thought not scare you?” “A little,” she admitted with a smile. Theresa was working on Kay’s LAST, frazzled nerve.
“Ms. Crane,” she heard the younger girl call out in a voice filled with irritation. Peeking her dark head out the door. “You better come quick. The Terror has struck again.” “Terror?” Gwen laughed. “Where do you come up with this stuff?” “Dunno,” Kay shrugged. Stepping into the room. “Wow!” Gwen breathed. “I think you should pick that one. You’re going to knock some lucky guy’s socks off.” “Really?” Kay asked. Twirling around self-consciously in front of the full-length mirror in the corner of the room. “Really,” Gwen said. “In fact…I think I have the perfect earrings to go with that dress,” she said. Walking over to Ethan’s armoire and rifling through a small jewelry box on the top. “Here,” she smiled. Presenting the pair of earrings to Kay. Kay snatched them greedily from her hands and fastened them on her earlobes. “You’re right. They ARE perfect. Thanks,” she smiled.
“What’s going on in there?” Gwen said with a nod of her head. “Oh,” Kay groaned. Throwing herself on the bed beside Gwen. “Spinderella ripped one of those expensive gowns in two. Can you believe her? She stepped into the dress—didn’t bother slipping it over her head—and ripped it down the middle. Did I mention she’s a klepto, too? Yeah…the klepto klutz. Keeps stuffing little ‘mementos’ into that two-ton make-up suitcase of hers.” Gwen snickered helplessly. “Stop. Stop. I can’t hear anymore of this. I’m never going to be able to look into her eyes again.” “She HATES you, you know. Thinks of you as an obstacle in the way of her destiny. Which according to Termite is to marry Ethan, suck him dry, and have a mansion full of filthy bubble-brained kids.” “It’s just a crush,” Gwen sighed. “Whatever,” Kay muttered. Either this chick was blind. Or she was way confident in Forrest Junior’s wuv.
“Sheridan,” Gwen said in a relieved voice. “Everything okay?” Sheridan sighed and plopped herself down on the bed between Gwen and Kay. “Well…Amanda didn’t like those dresses too much anyway.” Gwen arched a brow at her curiously. “Destroyed. Completely and utterly destroyed,” Sheridan informed her. “Where IS Ethan, by the way?” she asked. Resting her weary blond head on Gwen’s shoulder. “At the office. He should be here by now…Ethan,” she said happily. Jumping to her feet and hugging his neck. “How was your day? How was work?” “Okay,” Ethan grumbled. “Aunt Sheridan? Why are you,” he paused. Casting a wary glance Kay’s way. He couldn’t quite pinpoint it. It was all a little too foggy. But he seemed to remember something to do with her, a camera, and red high heels. “What are you doing here?”
“Ethan!” Theresa squealed. Sprinting…well, Theresa fashion, of course—through the open door. Arms wide open. “Does he look like a deer caught in the headlights or what?” Kay smirked. “I bet his feeble brain is sending off signals to run.” “Theresa,” Ethan said slowly. Catching her before she fell. “Figures,” Kay mumbled. Sometimes I wonder…nah. NO ONE would purposely act THAT stupid for an imbecile like HIM. “Oh, Ethan,” Theresa bubbled. “It’s FATE. You caught me. You’re my hero.” “Ugh!” Kay groaned. Rolling her eyes. “Girlfriend standing right here.” Theresa ignored her. Staring at Ethan dreamily. “Somebody get her into therapy. NOW,” she hissed. Stalking out of the room. “I can’t watch any more of this.” I don’t think I can fight the urge to slap some sense into her any longer. “Theresa,” Sheridan said. Trying desperately to interrupt the weird moment. Could she be anymore obvious? If she were Gwen…Well. You’re not Gwen, Sheridan. Oh god. Did Ethan HAVE to be so clueless? “Theresa,” she repeated again. “I think that dress looks lovely. You should definitely pick that one. What do you think, Gwen?”
“Definitely,” Gwen said in a low voice. Studying Ethan curiously. “Do YOU like it, Ethan?” Theresa asked demurely. Ha! Demurely? “Y-Y-Y-esss,” he stammered. “It looks very…you look nice,” he gulped. “Oh thank you!” Theresa gushed happily. “Then you WILL be my date for the Homecoming Dance. Ethan, you’ve made me SSSSOOOO happy,” she twittered. Skipping…more like tripping—down the hall. Argh, Kay thought. Dodging her and glaring at Mr. Crane as he leered at Theresa. “What are you looking at, you dirty old man?” she sneered. Theresa did have her dress tucked into her pantyhose But still... Sticking her tongue out at him. “Ugh! The nerve!” she exclaimed. Appalled when he stuck his tongue back at her. “Take my advice,” she whispered in Gwen’s ear. “Dump him. NOW. I have the PERFECT man for you.”
To Be Continued...
Chapter 38:
“Oh my…Simone. Would you look at that? She looks like friggin’ Medusa! All those rollers in her hair. Well…at least she didn’t wear the fuzzy slippers. Wait a minute! She did! That girl is nuts! Simone…” Kay said in a hushed sarcastic tone. “I’m beginning to wonder.” “About what?” Simone asked boredly. Staring off into space with a dreamy smile on her face. Chad was going to DJ the dance tonight. She couldn’t wait. She didn’t care if she didn’t have a date. Who needed one when they could watch him all night? “I think Theresa’s really an alien from Mars. You know…a hybrid between those icky aliens Sigourney Weaver blasted and ET. Must have got her looks from the Reese’s pieces lover.” “Kay,” Simone rolled her eyes. “Could you lay off of her just one day?” “And why would I do that?” Kay asked in astonishment. “She makes it sooo easy for me. She supplies me with all the ammunition, Simone. It’s not like I have to dig up things from her mysterious past. The girl reads like a Dr. Seuss book.” Simone giggled. Theresa as the Cat in the Hat.
“Here she comes,” Kay whispered. “Miss Air-head America,” she crooned. “She probably voted for herself 289 times. No one I’ve talked to has admitted to voting for her. They’re all afraid of her. I bet you twenty bucks she hyperventilates when they crown her at the game tonight. If I were you, Simone…just bring a helmet. You might need it,” Kay laughed evilly. “I know I’m bringing mine. See you later, Simone. I have something very important I have to do,” she said. Walking down the hall to meet Miguel. Simone sighed when Kay’s face fell upon seeing Charity. Her best friend was going to get her heart broken. Those two…you never saw one without the other. Especially lately. She pulled her French book out of her locker and headed on to class. Smiling at Ms. Crane in the doorway.
“Miguel,” Kay smiled. Totally ignoring Charity. “I was wondering…you know how we always go to the Homecoming Dance together…” Miguel grinned at her, and Kay felt her heart flutter in her chest. “Do you want me to…” “Sure, Kay,” Miguel interrupted. “You and your date can meet me and Charity at my house. I taking Charity to meet Mama.” “I’d love it if you and Reese came with us, Kay,” Charity said sweetly. “You two make such an adorable couple.” “Reese,” Kay choked. “Yes, my Sugar Plum,” Reese said on cue. Scaring her out of her wits when he wrapped his arms around her. “Ow,” she grumbled. Rubbing her head. “I can’t wait. You’re going to be so beautiful, my Darling Kay,” Reese grinned. Leaning forward for a kiss. “Aww,” Charity sighed. Kay had the sudden urge to hurl. “Reese,” she warned. Holding a hand over her mouth. “I think I’m coming down with something. Don’t want to give you my germs,” she said. Rushing off to French class. She really was going to be sick. Miguel and…Pollyanna?
“Kay,” Ms. Crane said softly. Taking her aside halfway after class. “Are you feeling okay? You haven’t said one word the entire period.” “Oh yeah,” Kay muttered. “I…you wouldn’t understand. You got the guy you want eating out of the palm of your hand. Mine doesn’t even know I’m a girl. Or that I have a pulse.” “Kay,” Sheridan said gently. “That’s not true. Miguel most definitely knows you’re alive. And that you’re a girl. He just…he just sees you as a friend. His best friend. He still loves you.” “Not the way I want him to,” Kay whispered. Sheridan hugged Kay’s shoulders. “Miguel isn’t the ONLY boy on the planet. You have lots of guys interested in you, Kay Bennett.
You’re just too focused on Miguel to see it. And you have one very, very sweet guy in particular at your beck and call.” “Reese?” Kay scoffed. “Too Urkel-ish.” Sheridan laughed. “Reese is not that bad. He adores you, and he has a good heart. He does go a little overboard,” she admitted. “But I think if you gave him half a chance…Kay…just know he isn’t always going to be there. Don’t be so quick to push him away. You’ll never find out how wonderful he can be,” she said. Jessica’s face in her mind’s eye. She gave Kay a friendly pat on the shoulder. “I have to go make a phone call. Think about what I said. Okay?” “Okay,” Kay grumbled. “Reese? Ms. Crane…you’re so twitterpated you can’t see straight,” she mumbled. Grabbing her book bag and rushing out the door.
“AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!” Oh great. As if my day could get any worse. “Oh my goodness! I broke a nail!” Theresa shrieked in sheer panic. “This is all you fault,” she cried. Trembling at the horror of it all. “I have to look perfect for Ethan tonight. And now I won’t,” she wailed. Good grief, she thought. An evil idea forming in her head. “Theresa,” she said in a falsely sweet voice. Barely containing the urge to shudder. All she needed now was a lollipop to stick in her mouth. “Don’t cry. It’s alright. How can Ethan not think you’re the most beautiful girl in the world? ‘Cause we all know it’s true, don’t we?” Theresa’s face brightened into a ridiculous smile as she nodded her head. The rollers in her hair bobbing up and down. “And you know what? Don’t worry about the chipped fingernail. EVERYBODY wants to be like you, Theresa. BE you. You’ll start a new trend. Come on,” she said. Offering her a hand. “I’ll help you fix your make-up. You don’t want everybody to see you looking like a raccoon, do you?” Theresa jutted out her lower lip and shook her head. Taking Kay’s hand. “There, there,” Kay said softly. Rolling her eyes as she led Theresa inside Ms. Crane’s empty classroom.
Ten minutes later, she leaned back on her heels. Pleased as punch at her work of art. She slyly slipped the blue, red, and black permanent markers back in her book bag. “I’m finished,” she announced. “You can open your eyes now, Theresa.” She always did think Theresa would make a good clown. She already had the bumbling part down. “How do I look?” Theresa bubbled. Her smile making her look all the more absurd. “Fantastic, Darling,” Kay drawled. “The envy of the entire school.” “Oh, thank you!” Theresa giggled. Throwing her arms around Kay’s neck exuberantly. Oh, you’ll be thanking me alright, Theresita, Kay thought. Biting her lip to keep from laughing.
Ah. I needed that, she thought. Jumping down from Ms. Crane’s desk. Scribbling a quick note she knew would make Ms. Crane blush a deep red as soon as she saw it. She threw her head back in the air and cackled deviously. The woman might just have a heart attack. Maybe she should…nah. Where was the fun in that? Ms. Crane was strong. She could handle it. She’d just have to hope she wouldn’t kill her before the Dance. Miguel…eat your heart out, she thought with a smile. She was going to show him. And by the end of the night…he’d leave sweet little Charity flat on her face.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 39:
“No, Mom,” Kay whined. “You absolutely cannot be a chaperone.” To Simone she hissed, “The last thing this party needs is my mom. The June Cleaver wannabe.” Simone giggled. Grace cocked her head to the side and smiled at the two girls. Shaking her head. “It’s too late. I already volunteered. I even made a tomato soup cake for you guys. I know how much you love it.” Simone couldn’t stop the involuntary shudder that ran through her body. “Dad,” Kay said desperately. “Uncle Hank!” she cried when he walked into the living room. “Tell Mom.” Hank grinned at his niece cluelessly. “Tell Mom what…Ow! What was that for?” he grimaced when Kay stomped the heel of her shoe on his foot.
“The reason she can’t be a chaperone at the Homecoming Dance.” “Because…” “Mom,” Kay said sweetly. “They already have enough chaperones. Don’t they, Uncle Hank? That’s what they told you when you volunteered.” “What the…um…yeah. That’s EXACTLY what they told me, Grace. And I’m sure Sam wants all that DEE-LIC-EEOUS tomato soup cake to himself. Right, Bro?” Hank grinned wickedly. Slapping Sam’s shoulder on the way out the door and ignoring the daggers his big brother was shooting his way. “Wait up, you guys,” Jessica called. Scurrying out the front door. “You forgot me,” she mumbled. Racing to catch up to the trio.
“You owe me big time,” Hank said as he strode alongside the two girls. Jessica nipping at his heels. “Come on, Uncle Hank,” Kay grinned. “I think YOU owe ME.” Hank stuffed his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket and looked at her curiously. Kay groaned. “Which is worse? Your autopsy reading death by tomato soup or spending a few hours with a bunch of hormonal teens? Besides,” she grinned. “I have someone very special I want you to meet.” Hank’s brown eyes lit up with interest. “Oh yeah,” he said. “Is it a woman?” Kay rolled her eyes. “Who did you think I wanted you to meet? Yeah, it’s a woman. Never mind. I understand. Poor little Uncle Hanky hasn’t been on a date for a very, very long time,” she teased. “I’ve been on dates,” Hank blustered. But Kay wasn’t buying it. “Don’t worry, Uncle Hank,” Jessica said sweetly. “We all know you’re a great guy,” she consoled. “Stop…” “We’re here,” Kay breezed. Knocking on the Lopez-Fitzgeralds’ door.
“Come in,” Luis said distractedly. Tugging at the neck of his suit shirt in annoyance. “Whoa, Luis! Going all out, Buddy. For a Homecoming Dance?” “He wants to look nice for Ms. Crane,” Theresa sniffled. Hank did a double take. Kay couldn’t fight the gigantic smile that tugged at the corners of her lips when she saw Theresa and was reminded of the fiasco at the game earlier in the evening. There Theresa was. Bubbling with excitement. Practically jumping up and down, in fact. When Mr. Crane announced her as this year’s Homecoming Queen. And made a FATEful slip-up. Calling her Ms. Tammy Faye…er, Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald as last year’s queen crowned her. Theresa stopped mid-hyperventilation. Her brown eyes widening like saucers. And promptly passed out when she saw her reflection in her trophy. “Why the funeral shroud? Is that like a new thing at these shindigs?”
Simone and Kay burst into raucous laughter, and Luis couldn’t help but smirk at his best friend’s remark. Pilar threw her hands up in the air. “MIJA! It’s not that bad. Really. The lights in the Youth Center will be dim and…” Whitney stared at her feet. She didn’t want to give Kay the satisfaction of seeing her smile. The doorbell rang again, and Kay threw the door open. Certain she would come face to face with Miguel. All decked out. Instead she saw…REESE. “These are for you,” he grinned. His glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose. She took the crumpled bouquet from his hands and handed it to Jessica. “Thank you,” she said between clenched teeth. “Jessica…put those in some water for me. Reese, you didn’t have to,” she said. Cringing as her eyes took him in. In all his powder blue glory. Great, she thought. He plucked those flowers right out of Mrs. Doolittle’s front yard. And…this was the real kicker…he looked like Brainy Smurf.
“Knock, knock,” a voice called from behind him. And Kay smirked when Luis nearly killed Reese in order to reach Ms. Crane’s side. “Wow,” he mumbled in disbelief. “Wow…you look…you look…” “Good grief!” Kay exclaimed. Crossing her arms across her middle. “Spit it out! She looks like a million bucks. That’s what you wanted to say. Right?” Sheridan’s lips twisted into a smile as she smoothed her hands down the skirt of her dress. “You look beautiful,” Luis whispered in her ear. Placing a gentle kiss on her cheek and making her shiver in delight. “How did you ever find a dress to match the color of your eyes?” Kay held a finger to her throat and pretended to gag. “Real original, Buddy,” Hank laughed. “Like you haven’t used that li…Hello,” he whistled. “Who is that?”
Sheridan gave him a funny look. “I hope you don’t mind, Luis. I brought Ethan with me. And Gwen took your advice. She volunteered to be a chaperone at the dance tonight.” Ethan produced another bouquet of roses. This time pink roses. “These are for Theresa. Where is she?” “I’ll go get her,” Whitney volunteered. “Kay,” Simone whispered. “Ms. Hotchkiss is definitely checking your uncle out.” “Yeah…she is, isn’t she?” Kay smirked. “I knew she wasn’t completely stupid. Chalk her being with Ethan up to temporary insanity, Simone. Looks like Phase I of my plan is off to a great start.” “OH, ETHAN!” Theresa said breathlessly.
Momentarily forgetting her woeful appearance, she raced across the room and launched herself into Ethan’s arms. Oblivious of her audience. Oblivious? Ha! Well…the point could be argued she was ALWAYS oblivious. “You look so handsome!” she gushed. And nervous. And fumbling. And like a dumbass, Kay’s brain supplied. Where was Miguel? “Miguel just called. He said he and Charity would meet you at the dance. Now hurry along,” Pilar smiled. “They’re waiting for you.” Oh yeah, Kay thought. Slipping out of Reese’s reach. This party was off to a great start already. Well…she’d just have to fix that, wouldn’t she?
To Be Continued...
Chapter 40:
“Chad…I LOVE what you’re doing with the music,” Simone gushed. “Thank you,” Chad grinned. “It’s…it’s…I LOVE this song.” “Simone,” Kay hissed. Grabbing her best friend by the elbow. “Stop it! You’re scaring me. Another…forget it. I give up. Join the Stupid Females of Harmony Club. Theresa will probably let you share presidential duties,” she muttered. Simone turned back to Chad with a silly grin plastered on her face. “I just LOVE to dance,” she rushed. Eyes closed. “Wanna dance with me, Chad? Chad? Chad? Hey,” she said disappointedly. “Where’d he go? Ms. Crane…did you see where Chad went?” Sheridan shrugged her shoulders. “Chad Harris…you went to get me some punch, didn’t you?” she squealed. Hugging herself in excitement.
“Oh Miguel,” Charity sighed. “Thank you so much for inviting me. I’ve never been to a dance before,” she said shyly. “You’re welcome,” Miguel smiled. “I wouldn’t want to ask anyone but you.” “Gag me,” Kay grumbled. Watching the pair in disgust from a dimly lit corner of the Youth Center. “I feel like I’m stuck in a Leave it to Beaver nightmare.” She adjusted the spaghetti straps of her gown. So far things were NOT going as planned. Not at all. However…it was kinda fun watching her uncle make a play for Ethan Crane’s girlfriend. Oh boy did he need help, she thought.
“So…,” Hank grinned. A sparkle in his brown eyes. “Would the lady like to dance?” Gwen fought the uncontrollable urge to laugh. “In these heels?” she smirked. She might as well have been Lady Liberty. She towered above the guy. “Are you calling me short?” Hank gasped in mock offense. Gwen let loose a very unlady-like snort. “Short doesn’t even begin to describe it. But I have to give you credit where credit is due. You’re persistent. Alright. I’ll dance with you if you promise you’ll stop hounding me about it.” Hank grabbed her by the waist and twirled her out into the dance floor. “Ready Ginger?”
“Yo, Whitney.” Whitney’s brown eyes lit up, and Theresa gave her a very knowing smile. “Theresa…don’t you even say it. Don’t you dare,” Whitney warned. Before turning around. “Hi, Chad,” she said demurely. Chad held his hand out. “Luis is taking care of things while I take a break. What do you say? Dance with me?” “I…I don’t know,” Whitney said uncertainly. Her eyes darting around the room. What if Simone saw her? “She’d love to,” Theresa bubbled. Shoving Whitney forward. Chad caught her by the waist, and Whitney lost herself in his eyes. “Um…we better go dance now,” Chad whispered.
“Jessica…have you seen my Sugar Dumpling?” Jessica’s blue eyes twinkled as she fixed Reese’s crooked bow tie. “I think she went to the ladies’ room.” “Oh,” Reese nodded. “She must really have to go. This is her 5th glass of punch,” he said. Eyes comically wide behind the black frames of his glasses. “That’s a lot of punch,” he laughed. Jessica smiled at him. Her 5th glass. Kay had yet to take a single sip of punch tonight. That was just an excuse to avoid the awkward boy in front of her. “Forget the punch, Reese,” she said. Taking the glass from his hands and setting it on the table beside her. “Let’s have fun.”
“Oh my god,” Sheridan giggled as she watched Reese and Jessica out on the dance floor. If that was Kay…Kay would crawl under the nearest rock and die. Where was Kay? Kay was forgotten as soon as she felt his breath on her neck. “How would you like to show them how it’s done?” She twisted around in his arms and floored him with a brilliant smile. “A little salsa…a little rumba…maybe even a tango or two.” “Luis,” she whispered. Batting her lashes at him playfully. Toying with the collar of his shirt. That simple touch electrifying his senses. “We can’t do that,” she laughed. “We’re the chaperones. And besides…I don’t think I can control myself once I’m in your arms. Strange things happen to me.” “Oh really?” he said with the utmost interest. Wrapping his arms around her waist. “What kind of things?”
“Get a room, why don’t you?” Kay rolled her eyes in passing. Sheridan’s cheeks flushed bright red when she spotted Suzie across the Youth Center. Giving her a thumbs up sign. Then she laid eyes on Theresa and Ethan. “Theresa seems to have forgotten all about the little ‘incident’,” she said in wonderment. Luis followed her gaze to the couple on the dance floor. His little sister was all over Ethan Crane. He shook his head. As far as Theresa was concerned, nothing else mattered. Ethan Crane was her whole world. Who really cared if she looked like the Grim Reaper’s bride? Come to think of it…his little sister kinda reminded of a certain killer doll with her makeover. “I can’t believe Gwen’s taking this so…so calmly.” “Ms. Crane,” Luis laughed heartily. Crooking his finger out in front of him. “I’d say Gwen is otherwise occupied.” Sheridan gasped for air between belly laughs. “Oh he’s bad. So bad,” she wheezed as she watched Hank trample on Gwen’s feet. “Looks like they’re giving Reese and Jessica a run for their money. Some party, huh?” “Some party,” Luis smiled. His eyes never leaving her. Some party indeed.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 41:
“So,” Kay teased. “What do you think?” “About what?” Gwen huffed. Rubbing her sore feet. “Ouch! I think my toes are broken.” Kay cackled deviously. “You know…” “No, I don’t know,” Gwen grumbled. But Kay didn’t miss the tiny smile. The twinkle in her eye. “Yes, you do. Tell me. Have I succeeded? Have I cured you from your bout of temporary insanity? Come on,” Kay whined. “He’s…he’s an uncoordinated goof. But…he’s kinda cute,” she admitted grudgingly. Kay flashed her a mega-watt smile. “Cute,” Hank whispered to himself. “Brad Pitt cute? Ben Affleck cute? Say it. You think I’m drop-dead gorgeous.” Gwen rolled her eyes. “Puppy dog cute,” she smirked. Hank’s mouth hung open. “Puppy…puppy dog cute? You think I look like Lassie?” Gwen hobbled over to the refreshment table. “No,” she grinned. “What’s the name of that dog in that movie with Tom Hanks? Him. You definitely look like him.” Kay smiled. Way to burst Uncle Hank’s bubble, Gwen.
She poured herself a glass of punch and scanned the dance floor. Jessica and Reese were still at it. Good. Little sisters were good for something, after all. She didn’t want Reese stuck to her like flypaper. “Oh! Kay! Why aren’t you out there dancing?” Kay bit her lip to stop from shouting what she really wanted to say. ‘Because you’ve suddenly become Miguel’s Siamese twin!’ “Um…Reese is a little bit busy right now,” she said sadly. Staring at her feet. She heard Charity whisper something to Miguel. And she had to bite her lip to contain her grin when she felt Miguel’s hand on her shoulder. “Kay? Kay, would you like to dance?” Yes! Yes! I’d like to dance! “You don’t have to dance with me because you feel sorry for me, Miguel. I’m okay. Really.” “Kay Bennett…I didn’t ask you because I felt sorry for you. I asked you because I want to.” Her dark eyes sparkled at him. And if Miguel hadn’t inherited ALL the stupid genes Theresa didn’t have, he would have seen once and for all that his best buddy loved him. It was like a flashing neon sign. Kay took Miguel’s hand with a sigh. Oh well…nobody ever said she loved Miguel for his I.Q.
“Dance with me.” Whitney’s head snapped around, she found herself staring into the blue eyes of none other than Chris Hall. “Excuse me?” “I said dance with me,” he repeated. Pulling her free from Chad’s arms. Whitney jerked her arm free and glared at him. “No thank you,” she spat. “I already have a wonderful partner,” she said. Smiling rather shyly at Chad. “You heard the lady,” Chad smirked. Pushing Chris backwards. “She don’t want to dance.” Whitney sighed in relief when Chad led her away. To a quiet corner. “Thank you.” “You’re welcome,” Chad grinned. “Hey…would you like something to drink? I’ll be right back.” Whitney’s eyes were glued on his every move as he walked away, and she sighed happily and closed her eyes. Maybe…
“OH WHIT! IT’S SO WONDERFUL! ETHAN IS SUCH A GOOD DANCER! I CAN’T WAIT TO DANCE WITH HIM AT OUR WEDDING!” Whitney’s eyes popped open, and she groaned in frustration. The whole school didn’t just hear that. Did they? “Theresa…Honey…do you have to be so…” “So what, Whit? In love? Lucky? Gorgeous?” she giggled. Whitney bit her lip to the point of pain. Gorgeous? Ha! Her best friend kind of reminded of a toy soldier at this moment. She remembered the glee in Kay’s eyes at the game earlier when half of Harmony had been scared out of their wits. She was sure…”WHITNEY! YOU’RE NOT LISTENING TO ME!”
“Look…Ethan…just a word of advice,” Luis said. “A word of what?” Ethan grinned stupidly. Luis shook his head. Maybe Theresa wasn’t so far off the mark. Maybe the terrible F-word was working its magic. “Luis,” Sheridan rolled her eyes. “Don’t even think that.” “W-W-hat?” “Nevermind,” she smiled. Blue eyes twinkling in amusement. “Leave him alone,” she whispered in his ear. “Roger decided he liked Theresa more.” “Roger? Who’s Roger?” “Ethan’s brain cell,” Sheridan said blithely. Giggling when Luis gave her a ‘what the hell?’ look. “You heard me right. Ethan’s brain cell is now taking up residence in your sister’s fantasy-filled head. Do you think I should tell Gwen?” Luis started choking on his own laughter. And Ethan’s absentminded “Are you okay?” didn’t help much. Especially when he walked across the dance floor like a horror-flick zombie. With a silly grin on his face. “Do you think we should tell Gwen?” Sheridan laughed as they watched Ethan lift the black veil from Theresa’s painted face. “I DO! I DO!” Theresa squealed. Jumping up and down. “I don’t think we have to. He didn't scream. It MUST be love."
To Be Continued...
Chapter 42:
“EWW! This punch tastes funny!” Chris was dying laughing on the inside. Yeah…it DID taste funny. In a good way, he thought as he downed another glass. Mmm, mmm. Good. Ms. Crane didn’t seem to think the punch tasted funny. She’d had…oh, he’d lost count of how many glasses she’d had. She and Miggie’s copper brother were putting on quite a show. Damn, she was all over the guy. Maybe he should cut in. Nah. He could barely slow dance. There was no way in hell he could tango. Not like that. He’d have better luck with The Ice Queen. Miss Whitney Russell.
“LUIS,” Sheridan shouted over the music. Very loudly. “I LOVE DANCING WITH YOU. IT’S SO MUCH FUN!” Luis gave her another one of his breathtaking grins. And Sheridan couldn’t help it. “YOU’RE TOO DAMN SEXY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, OFFICER!” Kay burst into hysterical laughter in Miguel’s arms. “Oh god,” she groaned. “Theresa’s rubbing off on her. You know. Kind of like poison oak.” Miguel laughed with her. Charity smiled tightly at them both from the sidelines.
“Jessica? Have you seen My Sunshine?” Jessica rolled her eyes behind Reese’s back. His Sunshine? Boy did her sister have Reese fooled! “Uh…uh…” “I SEE HER!” he grinned. Jessica tripped over her skirt as he pulled her back out onto the dance floor. She blushed a deep crimson color when he started flailing his arms around and shaking his derriere to the music. “Reese!” He looked like he needed a lifeguard, she thought with a laugh. He was drowning.
“Luis,” Sheridan growled. Wrapping her arms around him and pressing herself against him more fully. “DANCE FOR ME, BABY!” Luis’s brown eyes about popped out of their sockets at her next move. She didn’t. She did! “Sheridan,” he stammered. “Did you just…” “Squeeze your ass—ets?” she teased. Golden brow arched at him playfully. Luis stopped her roving hands as they traveled down his chest. Loosening buttons on the way. “In front of the whole…” She cut him off with the kiss to end all kisses. “School,” he gasped. “What’s got into you tonight?” “Hmm. You like?” Sheridan purred.
Whitney laughed. Embarrassed for her. “Man,” Chad chuckled. “Hey Ms. Crane! This dance is strictly PG-13!” Chad pretended to be hurt when Whitney slapped his chest in embarrassment. “OW! What was that for? She’s going to want to hide beneath the nearest rock tomorrow, and you know it.” “CHAD! There you are! I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Simone gushed. “Thanks for keeping him company, Whitney.” Whitney stood shell-shocked in the middle of the dance floor as Simone whisked Chad away.
“WHIT! LOOK! I GAVE MY TIARA TO ETHAN! DOESN’T HE LOOK FANTASTIC?” Whitney choked in surprise. Okay…this was going too far. But…Ethan grinned stupidly. She shook her head. The idiot was making NO move to take the crown off. Suddenly she was very worried. First the make-up, the heels, the dress. Now this. “Theresa…Honey. I’m sure Ethan doesn’t like wearing your crown. He must feel so silly. Don’t you, Ethan?” Ethan’s blue eyes sparkled at her. “Actually…no.” People on the dance floor stopped to watch Morticia and RuPaul’s white twin stumble over each other’s feet.
“Oh god,” Gwen groaned. “I think I’m going to be sick,” she said with a hand over her mouth. “How embarrassing,” Hank laughed. “Your girlfriend…oops! Did I say that?” “Shut up!” Hank straddled the chair in front of Gwen and smiled at her. “Hey,” he said softly. “I think it’s better you found out sooner rather than later. Least you two aren’t married,” he said gleefully. “Thank God for that,” Gwen whispered to herself. The…um, dressing up was more than a little disturbing.
“May I cut in?” Can’t he hear me screaming ‘NO’ on the inside? Apparently not, Kay realized as Reese puckered up for a kiss when Miguel let her go from his arms. “Sugar Plum…I missed you so much.” AHHH!!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!! Watching Miguel make a fool of himself in front of Charity was even worse. Why didn’t he look at her like that? Reese twirled her again. And Kay felt like a basketball spinning on someone’s finger. “Reese! Stop it!”
“Sheridan…Sheridan.” Sheridan giggled as Luis tried to peel her off him. “Sheridan,” he said firmly. Horrified as he watched tears spring to her blue eyes and her lips pout at him. Damn. She sure did fight dirty. Without even realizing it, he thought with a helpless smile. “Stop that,” he shushed. “You know I hate to see those pretty eyes so sad. Come here,” he beckoned. She fit in his arms so perfectly. What the hell. So what if he didn’t know which way was up with her tonight? She looped her arms around his neck and hugged him close. Whispered words that made his heart want to burst out of his chest. “I think I love you, Luis.” And passed out cold.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 43:
Kay snickered as she flicked the tiny droplets of water at Sheridan. “Wake up,” she chanted. “Wake up.” Sheridan groaned and threw her arm over her face. Kay sighed heavily. Okay…tiny droplets weren’t working. Her dark eyes lit up. Oh sweet inspiration! “Oh god,” Gwen muttered under her breath. “What bright idea have you come up with this time?” Kay ignored her. Ambling off to the bathroom. Gwen heard the sound of running water and couldn’t help but smile. The old hand in warm water trick. “Kay Bennett…you ARE evil. Sheridan is DEFINITELY going to kill you.” “Sheridan,” she whispered. “Sheridan.” “Go away,” Sheridan grumbled. Burying her messy blond head under her down pillow. “Fat chance of that happening,” Kay said. Sheridan slapped at Kay’s hand when she picked up it slyly. “Oh no you don’t! I can fail you for that!”
“You wouldn’t,” Kay challenged. Sitting on her hands. A grin a mile wide on her face. “Now will you wake up?” “She’s not going to stop, Sher. Might as well do it,” Gwen laughed. “Very persistent gal. Runs in the family.” Sheridan threw the thick comforter to the side with a few very unladylike curses. Directed at…who else? “Ms. Crane,” Kay said with wide eyes. “I’m going to tell my mommy on you. You said a dirty, dirty, nasty word.” Sheridan staggered to the bathroom clutching her head in agony. “Be nice,” Gwen warned. “She doesn’t do hangovers well.” “Gwen,” Sheridan wailed. “I’m already on it. One steaming hot mug of black coffee coming right up.”
Blood-shot blue eyes stared at her from the mirror. “How did THIS happen?” Kay’s amused voice made her jump. “You mean you don’t know? Ms. Crane,” she teased. “You were really chugging that punch down.” Her toothbrush paused in its motions. “Don’t tell me. Somebody spiked it.” “Not just somebody. Guess. Harmony High’s resident creep in a football uniform.” “Chris Hall.” “Bingo!” “STOP YELLING!” Kay held up her hands defensively. “Okay. Geez. Aren’t you Ms. Suzy Sunshine this morning? Speaking of crazy Suzie’s.” Sheridan rolled her eyes. “Who? Me?” “Speaking of crazy Suzie’s,” Kay continued. “You should have seen her. Thank God Principal Reid was too distracted by her attack on his…um, person…EW!…to notice you passed out. Stone-cold drunk,” Kay smirked. “Luis had to carry you out of the Youth Center.”
Oh my god! Luis! Sheridan’s cheeks burned red. She made a fool of herself in front of the straight-laced cop that had stolen her heart. Stolen her heart? “Um…Kay…did I…did I do anything crazy last night? Anything…you know…that I might be embarrassed of in the light of the day?” Kay made a zipping motion with her fingers. “I’m not saying a word. Not a single word.” The secretive little she-demon. There was definitely something she wasn’t telling her. She winced as the sweatshirt slipped over her head. Damn. Even her hair hurt. Her eyes landed on the pair of gray sweatpants in the far corner of her closet. What the hell. It wasn’t like Luis would want to see her anytime soon. Unless he came by to tell her he could never look at her again.
Gwen and Kay sat on the couch. Heads together. Laughing raucously. “And WHAT may I ask is so funny?” She sank into the armchairs deep cushions with a sigh. “Oh Sheridan…too bad you were passed out. You missed quite a party last night.” “Spill it.” Kay grinned. “Where should I start?” “I don’t think I can stomach the thought of Suzie mauling Principal Reid. Go straight to the best parts.” “Reese and Chad got into a fistfight with Chris Hall.”
Sheridan’s jaw dropped open. “What? How? Why?” “Whiney…I mean Whitney refused to dance with him. Over and over again, I might add. Well, Chris wouldn’t get the message. He grabbed Whitney and tried to force her out on the dance floor. When Whitney said ‘no’, Chad landed the first punch.” Gwen smiled. “I still don’t know how Reese got mixed up in the whole mess.” Kay’s eyes sparkled. “How else? Chris was so sloshed he couldn’t see straight. It was an accident. He broke Reese’s glasses. Who knew Reese was so…oh my god! Reese has muscles!”
Sheridan giggled helplessly. “Duh!” She immediately winced. “Well…tell me more. What else happened?” “Ethan did the most wonderful impersonation of Elvis Presley I ever did see,” Kay said sarcastically. “And Theresa ate it up,” Gwen laughed. “Ms. Crane…someone needs to tell DUMBY. He has absolutely no rhythm. Forrest can’t dance.” Sheridan’s eyes watered over with tears from the laughter. “You’re killing me,” she gasped. “That’s not the half of it,” Kay confided. “Theresa was so overcome with emotion, she threw her bra to him. Hiked up her skirt. And…” “And what?” “Tripped flat on her clown face. But not without taking out a few…DOZEN…people.” Gwen’s brown eyes danced. “I’m telling you, Sher. They went down like dominoes.” “All in a day’s work for the Lethal Weapon,” Kay grinned.
Sheridan wiped the tears from her eyes. “I missed a lot.” Kay and Gwen looked at each other and burst into laughter. “Boy did you ever,” Kay teased. “Kay Bennett…what are you not telling me? I knew it. What happened before I passed out?” “I’ll put it this way,” Gwen said slowly. “If the dashing Officer Lo-Fitz didn’t know you were absolutely gaga over him before…he certainly does now.” Sheridan brought her pillow to her face and screamed into it. It was coming back to her in bits and pieces. “Did I really squeeze his butt in public?” “Just like Charmin,” Kay cracked. “Okay,” she backed down. “Really, really BAD joke. Sorry.” “Did I…did I say something stupid?” “I plead The Fifth on the grounds that you might take out your considerable FRUSTRATION on me,” Kay said seriously. “Kay,” Sheridan warned. “No, M’am.”
The doorbell rang, and Kay swore she saw Sheridan’s eyes cross. “Answer the damn door,” she said between gritted teeth. Gwen got up and hobbled to the door. But not without a very necessary stop to peer out the window. “It’s him. It’s him.” “Oh my god! I can’t let him see me like this!” Sheridan shrieked. Jumping up in a blind panic. Unfortunately for her…”Ouch!” Kay groaned. Another reason on Ms. Crane’s considerable list. “Sorry,” she apologized. Scooping the pair of sneakers into her arms and helping Sheridan to her feet. “Luis,” she smiled brightly. Hopping on one foot to the couch where she collapsed in an exhausted heap. Luis smiled back just as brightly. “Do they have it bad or what?” Gwen pulled Kay into the kitchen with a finger to her lips. “Too bad she doesn’t remember saying it.” “I think we can fix that,” Kay smirked. Stretching a slender arm out and turning the CD player on the counter on. David Cassidy crooned “I Think I Love You” from its speakers. And on the couch in the living room, Sheridan Crane passed out cold for the second time in 24 hours.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 44: “Sheridan! Sheridan! Wake up!” Why did she feel like she had done this before? “Luis,” she said groggily. “Luis…what happened?” Luis slipped an arm beneath her back and helped her sit up. His brown eyes were twinkling with amusement. He ducked his head, but Sheridan could still see the smile threatening. “You passed out on me. Again,” he chuckled. “That makes it twice in 24 hours. I don’t know if I should be flattered or embarrassed.” “Flattered,” Sheridan blurted. Luis grinned at her. “You’re blushing,” he teased. Caressing her cheek lightly with his knuckles.
In the kitchen, Gwen laughed helplessly while Kay groaned in frustration. “Those two…God! Why is she so damn shy around him? He’s only a guy.” “Kay,” Gwen snorted. “Okay,” Kay rolled her eyes. “So he isn’t an ordinary guy. At this rate, my grandchildren will have to endure this…this stupidity. That’s it! We’re going to have to get her drunk again. That’s the only way she’s going to spit it out.” “I don’t know about that,” Gwen smirked. Kay poked her head back around the kitchen door. Hanging on every word.
“Luis,” Sheridan gulped nervously. “Luis…about last night…” “Yeah,” he encouraged. Taking her hand in his and turning it palm side up. “Luis,” she continued. “I may have said some things…” Her blue eyes fluttered shut at the gentle touch of his fingertips tracing the lines of her palm. “Yes! Luis!” Gwen cheered as Luis cupped Sheridan’s hand to his cheek and kissed it sweetly. “She’s going to crack,” Kay said gleefully. “Sheridan,” Luis prodded. “You were saying…” “Would you look at that? He so knows what he’s doing.” “Who knows what he’s doing?” “Holy @#$%! Mrs. Crane! You scared me!”
Ivy’s blue green eyes sparkled mischievously. “Ooo. I just love eavesdropping.” Kay’s brows shot to the top of her head. “Really?” Gwen stumbled into the kitchen counter as Ivy wedged herself in between her and Kay. “Hey! You’re hogging up the best spot,” Kay glared. Ivy gave the teen her best ‘Don’t you dare mess with me’ stare. Gwen’s mouth hung open in shock when Kay didn’t back down. “Shh,” Gwen raised a finger to her lips. “Stop fighting. I can’t tell what’s going on.”
“You know,” Sheridan babbled. “I had too much to drink, and I really don’t know what I said. One time when Gwen and I went to a party…I had the bright idea to go skinny-dipping. In front of 50, 60 fully clothed people. It was so embarrassing! Not as embarrassing as this, though,” she muttered under her breath. Luis shook with laughter. “Now that I would kill to see.” “Meow,” Ivy purred. “What I wouldn’t give to see the good Officer…” “Ivy!” Gwen gasped. Kay snarled her nose. “Don’t I see a wedding ring on that finger?” she sassed. “Ugh," she shuddered uncontrollably. "Who wants to see Julian naked? No offense, Ivy.” “None taken,” Ivy grinned. “It is rather…pathetic’s too kind a word.”
“Sheridan. Slow down,” Luis grinned. “You weren’t that bad. In fact…you were the life of the party.” “You’re just being nice,” Sheridan said softly. “No. Really,” Luis laughed. “Kay has the pictures to prove it.” “K-Kay? That girl,” she shook her head. “Uh oh,” Kay grumbled. “Bust-ed.” “You have pictures?” Ivy perked up. “Yeah…but they’re going to cost you. I can sell them to you for…$50.” “What the…$50! For pictures?” “They’re really good pictures,” Gwen smirked. “Luis…I…I have a history of making a fool of myself when I’m with you. I can’t even look at you without blushing,” she blushed. “I like that about you,” Luis laughed. “Uh huh, Sheridan. All those naughty thoughts and fantasies filling your head. No wonder she has trouble staying conscious. He is drop-dead gorgeous,” Ivy sighed. Visions of Sam flashing before her eyes. "Geez,” Kay hissed. “You haven’t…you know…in a very long time, have you? And they say teens have sex on the brain. Obviously they haven’t met you.”
“Did you mean it?” Luis asked seriously. Staring into Sheridan’s blue eyes. Sheridan opened her mouth to speak but no words would NOT come out. ‘Hell, yes!’ she wanted to shout. But all that would come out was a tiny squeak. “Cause if you meant it…I…” “What? What, Luis?” she whispered softly. Barely able to breathe. “I think…I think…” “Okay, Elmer Fudd,” Kay rolled her eyes. “He’s just as bad as her.” “Shut up,” Gwen hushed. Ivy crossed her fingers. “I think I l-l-…” “DIOS MIO! LUIS! MIJO! IT’S TERRIBLE, MIJO,” Pilar burst through the cottage door in tears. Julian seconds behind her. Chugging a stiff brandy. “Mama? What is it, Mama?” Luis asked. Jumping to his feet. Sheridan slumped against the couch cushions wearily. Dammit, dammit, dammit, she screamed silently. Always an interruption. Ivy, Kay, AND Gwen jerked their heads back. “Your sister,” Julian spat. “Theresa? What about Theresa?” Pilar shoved the newspaper into Luis’s hands.
“THERESA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Sheridan took the newspaper from his hands, and her blue eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. “Oh god,” she groaned. “They didn’t.” “They DID,” Luis roared. ‘What?’ Ivy mouthed. Kay shrugged her shoulders. “Come on,” Kay whispered. “Come on. Read it. Read it.” “Crane Heir elopes with Bride of Chucky!” “Oh my god!” Kay snickered. THUD! “Poor Ethan. I’m so sorry, Gwen. But hey…now you’re free to go after Uncle Hank. He’s a great guy. Really. Gwen? Gwen!” Ivy stepped over Gwen’s prone body, stomped out of the kitchen and snatched the newspaper out of Sheridan’s hands. “Where is he? I’m going to kill that son of mine! She isn’t even out of high school!” "Ivy," Sheridan gasped in surprise. "Where did you come from?" Ivy ignored her and stalked out the door. Luis close behind her. And of course, Sheridan *had* to go. She had a few choice words for Ethan. “Hey! Wait up for me!” Kay called. “Sorry, Gwen. I can’t miss this!” she apologized. Before racing off after the angry mob.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 45:
"ETHAN SAMUEL CRANE!"
"Ethan Sam…Ivy Dear," Julian muttered sarcastically. "Don't you mean Ethan Julian Crane?" "Not now, Julian," Ivy barked impatiently. "Ethan! Unlock this door this instant!" Pilar bowed her head and prayed softly in Spanish. "Would you put a plug in it!" Julian spat. "So annoying," he confided to Sheridan. "Sheridan Dear," he grumbled. "You haven't run off and eloped with Officer Enchilada have you?" "JULIAN!" "OOOOOWWWW!" Julian screamed like a woman when Sheridan shoved him in the chest. "His name is Luis. L…U…I…S," Sheridan spelled. "What did I miss? Did I miss anything?" Julian looked down his nose at Kay. "And who might I ask are you? The Little Match Girl?" "Well, well," Kay snarled. "If it isn't the Dirty Old Man."
Ivy's fists pounded on Ethan's bedroom door. "Mot…ouch!" "Serves him right," Kay whispered. Grinning broadly when Ivy's fist connected soundly with Ethan's head. "Did you hear that? Maybe I should start calling him the Hollow Man. There's nothing in there. I mean there can't be. He married her," she shuddered. Sheridan raised a hand to her mouth at the sight of Theresa. "Aww. Isn't it sweet? Your nephew finally got the life-size Barbie he always wanted." Luis glared at Kay. "Okay," Kay grumbled. "Sorry." "Mommy," Ethan pouted. "Why did you hit me?" Kay's eyes almost rolled all the way back in her head. "EEEEEEEEETTTTTTHHHHHAAANNNNN!!!!! Your family's here to welcome me into the family. Isn't that nice of them?" she bubbled.
"Mija!" Pilar gasped in shame. "Where are your clothes?" "Mama," Theresa twittered. Batting her big brown eyes at Ethan. "It's my honeymoon." "Yeah, Pilar. It's her honeymoon," Julian added gleefully. "Yuck," Kay groaned. "No wonder she hasn't had any." "Huh?" Sheridan asked cluelessly. "Theresa…you look wuvly," Julian slurred. "Oh thank you, Mr. Crane!" Theresa gushed. Hugging his neck tightly. "THERESITA!" "Theresa!" "Aww. Luis…are you jealous?" "Ethan my boy," Julian grinned. Giving his son a thumbs up sign. "Not too bright, is she? Those are the best kind. How is she in…the you know."
"What Father?" Ethan asked dumbly. "In the…" "Alright! Alright! Forgive me for saying this…but I SO do NOT want to hear this!" Sheridan yelled. "I know the feeling," Kay agreed. "Dizziness. Overwhelming nausea. Hysterical blindness. Fear for the all mankind's future. Oh my god! Just think if they have children. The world is going to Hell in a Handbasket." "That's impossible," Luis ground out. “No, it’s not, Luis.” Theresa grinned proudly. “I’m a woman now.” Pilar sobbed quietly. "Come on, Theresa. We're getting this 'marriage' annulled. You’re under-aged." “And she’s NEVER been in her right mind,” Kay added. "NO! LUIS! You can't. No," Theresa screamed hysterically as Luis pulled her by the arm.
"Fa…Father! What's Wuis doing?" "He's taking your little Chiquita Banana, Son. Stand up to him. Don't let him do such a thing." "JULIAN!" Ivy screamed. "Are you even hearing what you're spewing?" "Aunt Sweridan," Ethan pouted. "Don't let Wuis do this to us. We're in wuv," he slurred. "Ther…she adores me," he said in a hushed whisper. "She says she's wuved me ever since she met me." "Is that what she said?" Kay scoffed. "She's loved you? Listen Forrest…where I come from…we call it a Fatal Attraction. You should be scared. Very scared, Dumby. This is one of those 'run for your life' moments."
"Don't do this, Luis! Please! Please don't! I love him! I've loved him my whole life!" Theresa cried. "Luis…is she okay?" Sheridan asked worriedly. "That?" Kay groaned. "No…she is NOT having a Grand Mal seizure. It just looks like it." "Mommy…mommy, I'm scared," Ethan cowered. Theresa threw herself down on her knees. "ETHAN! ETHAN! TELL THEM! YOU LOVE ME!" "Filthy, stinking drunks," Kay muttered. "No," Sheridan said in a puzzled voice. "Ethan, maybe. But I don't think…" "Theresa's NOT drunk," Luis sighed.
"Ethan?" Sheridan smacked her nephew upside the head. "The lights are on, but nobody's home," Kay smirked. "You can say that again." "Gwen! I'm so glad you're alright. Ooo. Does that hurt?" Gwen rolled her eyes and rubbed the goose egg on the back of her head. "Not as much as it could," she answered. Staring into Ethan's clueless blue eyes. “Gwen…don’t worry. This marriage…it won’t last,” Ivy consoled. “Ethan belongs with you.” “I’m not so sure,” Gwen said softly. “Ethan?” “Hen?” Kay and Sheridan snickered helplessly. “Do you love her? Does she make you happy?” “Yeah,” Ethan said stupidly. “He’s my whole world,” Theresa babbled. “I’d die without him. I really would,” she cried earnestly. “Damn,” Kay swore softly. “If only…” “Okay,” Gwen smiled. “O-O-O-kay?” Ethan stuttered. “Okay! Okay! Oh! Thank you, Gwen! Thank you!”
Luis shook his head helplessly. Why fight it? “IT’S FATE, ETHAN! IT’S FATE! WE’RE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! FOREVER AND ALWAYS! DESTINED!” “Come on, Pilar,” Sheridan said. Placing a comforting arm around Pilar’s waist. “God help you,” Kay said in all seriousness. “God help you. Hurry up, Gwen. Let’s go drown your sorrows,” Kay said gleefully. “I knew you were smart. You have to hook up with Uncle Hank.” Gwen’s laughter echoed in the halls. “Soon!” “Dear Lord!” Julian cringed. “It’s not necessary to…” Ivy grew faint as she watched her son swap spit with Pilar’s unbalanced daughter. “Julian,” she said weakly. “I need a stiff drink.” Julian’s ears perked up. And he smiled devilishly. He was always up for another drink.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 46:
“Thank you, Mijo. Sheridan,” Pilar sniffled. “I’ll…see you at home, Luis.” “Bye, Mama,” Luis waved. Gwen kissed Sheridan’s cheek. “Are you sure you don’t want to go paint the town red?” she teased. Sheridan groaned. “Gwen!” “Oh! I get it,” Gwen smirked. “You want Officer Yummy all to yourself.” Kay snickered and gave Gwen a high five. “When you’re right you’re right.” Sheridan blushed a deep red.
“NO! Really…we’re just going to talk. We NEED to talk. On second thought,” she said in a panicked voice, “I WILL go with you two.” “No, you don’t,” Kay grinned. “You’re staying right here.” “Bye, Luis,” Gwen called. Luis raised a hand in goodbye. “Consider yourself lucky, Gwen,” Kay could be heard saying as the door shut behind them. “You didn’t want the Lethal Weapon stalking you two all your unhappily married lives, did you?”
Sheridan’s lips twisted into a smile. “That girl.” “She’s something else, isn’t she?” Luis agreed. Patting the space on the plush sofa beside him. “I do believe we have something to discuss,” he smiled. Sheridan fidgeted with the rings around her fingers. “I still can’t believe they did it. Eloped! Luis…you know what this means, don’t you?” Luis’s brown eyes sparkled at her as he took her hand in his. “We’re related.” Sheridan sighed and leaned back against the pillows. “You’ll be Uncle Luis to Ethan’s children,” she smirked. “Oh god,” Luis groaned. “Can we talk about something else?” “Sure,” Sheridan said softly. Squeezing his hand. “Anything?” Luis queried. “Anything,” she whispered.
“Sheridan…look at me,” Luis requested. Sheridan’s blue eyes met his steadily. “Did you mean it? Did you mean what you said at the dance?” “I…I…Luis…I…” “Shh,” he hushed. Brushing his knuckles across her cheek. Great, Sheridan. Doesn’t the man realize you’re melting into a gooey pile of mush right before his very eyes? Luis grinned at the irregular sound of her breathing. He affected her as much as she affected him. “Luis…” “Don’t tell me. Show me,” he breathed. She kissed him with a sigh. And delved her fingers deeper into his black hair. Luis smiled against her lips and took a ragged breath. “Are things a little clearer now?”
“What?” she gasped. Resting her head against his chest. “Sheridan…” His eyes fluttered shut at gentle touch. The tickle of her nails as her hands slipped under his shirt. “Why Officer,” she teased. “Now who’s the one speechless?” He chuckled. Brown eyes smiling at her. His hands rested at her waist. Sheridan bit her lip when she felt his warm touch on her bare back. “I love the sweats,” Luis grinned. “Very…sexy…look…for…you,” he said between teasing kisses to her lips. Her brow. “And I thought the red dress was your favorite,” she pouted playfully.
Luis lowered her onto her back and threaded his fingers through her short golden curls. “Ms. Crane,” he said seriously. “Everything you wear is my favorite.” “Luis,” Sheridan whispered. Tracing the line of his jaw with her fingertips. “I didn’t mean it.” Luis pulled his hand free. “No…Luis…I don’t think I love you,” Sheridan admitted. Tears clinging to her lashes. “I KNOW I love you,” she said sincerely. Kissing his palm. “You make me crazy,” she laughed nervously. “I’m a complete mess around you. But I love it. I love you.”
Luis broke out into a slow grin. And he pulled her into his arms in a fierce hug. “So…I bring out the worst in you, is that it?” he teased. Sheridan smacked his chest playfully. But he grabbed her hand in his. “If that’s the worst…I can’t wait to see the best. You’re amazing. Mess or not,” he whispered. Wiping her happy tears away. Kissing the tip of her nose. He cupped her face lovingly. “Ms. Crane…I love you, too,” he smiled. “Oh Luis!” she cried. Throwing her arms around his neck. “Say it again. Say it again.” Luis laughed and kissed her lips gently. “I…Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald…am crazy in love with you…Sheridan Crane. How’s that?” Sheridan cut him off with a kiss.
“HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HAL-LE—LU-JAH!" "IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME!” Gwen shouted.
Sheridan collapsed against him in a fit of giggles. And Luis groaned.
“KKKKKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"GGGGGGGGWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
To Be Continued...
Chapter 47:
"OOOOHHHHHHHH!" Ivy groaned. Rolling over. What the hell was that? It felt…soft. Mushy. And reeked of alcohol. "OH MY GOD! JULIAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?" she screamed. "Iv..Ivy…what the devil are you yelling about?" Julian grumbled. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "This is the worst hang-over yet," he muttered. "This can't be real. Ivy would never…OUCH! Why didn't you warn me?" "I rather enjoy watching you in pain," Ivy said sweetly. Yanking the sheets from the bed and wrapping them around her. "GET OUT! GET OUT NOW!" she cried. Throwing the bedroom door open for him.
"AH! My nose! I think it's broken! ETHAN! ETHAN, WHERE ARE YOU?" Theresa's arms flailed wildly. "Theresa," Ivy gasped. "What on earth are you doing here?" "I thought it'd be nice if we had a big family breakfast," she pouted. "Gag me," Julian mouthed. Ivy grabbed a box of Kleenez from her nightstand. "Thank you, Mrs. Crane," Theresa smiled. Holding the tissue to her nose. "Theresa!" Ethan skidded past the bedroom door. "Theresa! Are you okay? What happened?" "Nothing," Theresa shook her head. "Oh! Ethan! I'm dizzy," she swooned. Ivy rolled her eyes when Ethan swept his teen-age bride up in his arms. "Is there anything I can do to make it better?"
Theresa's big brown eyes welled up with tears. Crocodile tears, Ivy'd bet. And her lower lip jutted out in the most ridiculous pout she had ever seen. "I want us to be one big, happy family," she sniffled. Ethan's brows shot up. "My family? Theresa…you have NO idea…" "Ethan," she trembled. "Please." "Mother…" HELP, he mouthed. "Get your clothes on before I go blind, Julian. We have a family breakfast to attend." "Why don't you just shoot me now?" Julian moaned.
"Ethan! Ethan!" Theresa squealed as they descended the stairs. "Someone's at the door! Can I go answer it? Please. Pretty please." "Pilar's never been so THRILLED about her domestic duties," Julian mumbled. "Ouch! What was that for?" "Oh…no particular reason," Ivy grinned devilishly. Pulling her robe tighter across her waist. "GOOD MORNING!" Theresa gushed. Sheridan jumped on the other side. A hand over her heart. "Theresa," she laughed nervously. "You…surprised me." Actually…well, it wouldn't be too nice to tell the newest member of your family they scared you.
"MS. CRANE! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT! WE'RE RELATED NOW!" "Um…Theresa," Sheridan gasped. Trying desperately to pry her arms loose from her neck. "I…can't…breathe." "Sorry," Theresa apologized. "Aunt Sheridan," Ethan cried. Sheridan bit her lip. By the looks of things…Ethan's alcoholic fog was clearing. He looked scared to death. "What are you doing here so early?" "Good God," Julian blustered when his eyes found the clock. "The dew is still on the grass! I never get up before 11 on Sundays!" Sheridan rolled her eyes at her brother. "I came by to see if you and Theresa wanted to go to church with me and…Do you want to go or not?"
"We'd be delighted," Ivy answered for them all. "WE MOST CERTAINLY WOULD NOT!" Julian roared. "Oh, Ethan!" Theresa bubbled. "I can't wait to show off my new husband to all my friends!" Ethan shrugged his shoulders. But Sheridan could tell the idea appealed to him greatly. "We'll go," he smiled. "Great! I'll just wait for you in the living room."
"Would you can it?" Sheridan groaned. "What's the matter with you, Julian? Afraid the saints and angels will turn you away at the door?" Julian crossed his arms in annoyance. "You're smothering me, Diddums," he snarled at Ivy. Ivy pointed at Theresa practically in her lap. "Do I look like I can help that?" she hissed. "Theresa, Dear. Don't you think that is enough..." "Mrs. Crane! I know! I have too much blush on and not enough eye shadow. Thank you! You're the greatest mother-in-law a girl could have!"
"I'm in HELL," Julian muttered. Fishing his flask of liquor out of his suit pocket. Sheridan snickered beside Ethan. "Aunt Sheridan...what am I going to do?" The limo slowed to a stop, and the door opened. "M'lady." Sheridan beamed and took Luis's hand. "I'm in HEAVEN," she sighed. "Sorry," she mouthed to Ivy. And she couldn't resist the urges of her inner child...she stuck her tongue out at her stuffy, older brother. "Help! Help!" Julian cried as the limo door slammed shut in his face.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 48:
"Can you believe it, Whit?" Theresa sighed dreamily. "It's almost Christmas. And Ethan and I are married." "A whole two months," Whitney agreed. "And who says there aren't miracles?" "Miracle? Try freak of nature," Kay snorted in passing. Simone giggled. "I can't believe we only have one more day of school before Christmas Break. It seems like only yesterday…" "Yeah, yeah, Simone," Kay rolled her eyes goodnaturedly. "Hey! Watch out! Too late," she muttered as Theresa 'accidentally' tripped Jenn. And Jenn went crashing into the Christmas tree in the middle of the hall. "I've lost count, Simone. What is that? Victim #896?" "Morning, Girls," Sheridan said cheerily. Sweeping by. "She's always so damn happy it's pathetic," Kay grumbled. "I swear Simone. Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in this totally ridiculous alternate reality. I mean it can't be real, can it? Lethal Weapon actually married the object of her obsession. And Ms. Crane...she and Officer Wuis are like these characters from a cheesy Harlequin romance."
"Kay!" Simone scolded. "If Ethan wants to stay married to Theresa that's his choice." "More like fatal mistake," Kay crossed her arms. "Do you know what she's doing now? Handing out invitations to a Christmas party at the Crane Mansion. A slumber party. In her and Ethan's bedroom. I'll let you in on a little secret, Simone," Kay whispered conspiratorially. "She has NSYNC posters plastered all over the wall up there. All the boy bands. And good ole hubby, too." "How?" Simone sputtered. Kay shrugged her shoulders. A devious twinkle in her dark eyes. "The door's always open. Apparently any lunatic can get in," she said. Casting a pointed look Theresa's way. "Theresa hardly got the Dynasty fantasy she's been dreaming of. It's more like the Addams Family over there."
"Kay," Miguel chuckled. "It's not that bad." "Sure...sure..this from the boy who's new favorite activity is to mooch off the baddies in town. How do Julian and sweet Charity get along?" Miguel's brown eyes glazed over at the sound of Charity's name. "Charity...I have to go find her." “Bye…Zombie Boy,” Kay sighed. Thank the good Lord I finally got over you, Miguel. Oh sure…you’re still nice to look at. And my oldest friend. Simone smiled at the Toothache Twosome. “They’re so…” “Sweet. I know, Simone. And I’m happy for them.” Simone looked at her incredulously. “Really,” Kay said. “Miguel IS a dreamboat. Yeah…with the personality of a plank of wood.” “Kay Bennett! Are you sure you’re not sick?” Kay slapped Simone’s hand away from her forehead. “I’m 100%. Look Simone…hate to run. But…” Simone raised a shaky hand to her OWN forehead as she watched Kay fall into step beside Reese and traipse into Ms. Crane’s classroom. “Toto…I have a feeling we aren’t in Kansas anymore,” she muttered under her breath.
The bell rang, and students scattered to and fro. Rushing to their respective classes. It WAS Finals Week, after all. “Alright class…this is it,” Sheridan smiled. Perching herself on the edge of her desk. “The end. Fini,” she said in a stage whisper. Whoops and hollers sounded from the back of the classroom, and the pout on Sheridan’s lips lasted maybe a full 10 seconds. “I love you, too, Bradley,” she grinned. Batting her eyelashes. She hopped down from her desk. Grabbing a stack of papers a mountain high. “Jeez, Ms. Crane,” Kay grumbled. “Are those our lumps of coal?” a tiny, timid brunette from the back corner winced. “You guys,” Sheridan laughed. “It’s Christmas. And I don’t look like The Grinch. Do I?” “No. I’d say…you look more like an elf,” Kay snickered. “With a gigantic hickey on your neck,” she hissed. Cracking up when Sheridan blushed a deep red to match her festive outfit.
The Final? Well…it was a cinch. Kay really couldn’t believe how easy it was. She actually got kind of choked up when she handed in her paper. “Kay,” Sheridan teased. “Is that…wait…let me look a little bit closer. Yes, it is,” she smiled. “I’m going to miss you, too.” “Okay. Okay,” Kay raised her dark brows. “I liked your class. A lot more than I thought I would.” “So…,” Sheridan ventured. Waving goodbye to Miguel and Charity. “Does that mean you’ll be taking the second session next semester?” “Anything’s possible,” Kay grinned. “Besides…someone has to keep you on your toes. Hey! What was that for?” Kay cried when Sheridan thumped her on the backside with her very own test. “Child abuse! Don’t think I won’t do it,” she challenged. The twinkle in Sheridan’s blue eyes told Kay she was on to her game. “Wow! It only took you half a year.” “Go on, Kay. Shoo!” Sheridan laughed. Following her out the open door. Right into Theresa’s path.
“Ms….Sheridan…Ms. Crane…Oh! You’re family now. You don’t mind me calling you Sheridan. Do you?” Theresa bubbled. Extending a…er, helping hand. Sheridan winced as she rubbed her elbow gingerly. “No. I don’t mind. But Theresa…I’d prefer it if you’d call me Ms. Crane during school.” “No problem,” Theresa nodded her head vigorously. Kay made goofy faces behind Theresa’s back. “Ms. Crane,” Theresa gushed. “I’m having a Christmas party. Maybe Ethan’s told you about it already.” Sheridan opened her mouth to say ‘no’, but Theresa plowed ahead. “Anyway…it’s just…me and the girls. And I…you’re invited,” she said with a silly grin. “Please say you’ll come,” Theresa pleaded. Shoving the hot pink invitation in Sheridan’s hand. “You’re Ethan’s favorite aunt, and my brother…Luis is crazy for you. I want to get to know you better,” Theresa said breathlessly. Bouncing on the balls of her feet.
“I…uh…Theresa…I…” “OH! THANK YOU SO MUCH!” Theresa squealed. Hugging Sheridan tightly before skipping back down the hall. Kay snatched the invitation from Sheridan’s hand. “Barbie! I bet you all play Truth or Dare and fill out all those stupid polls from Seventeen magazine. And to think…for a split second there I was upset I didn’t rank high enough with the Lethal Weapon to score an invite. See ya! Wouldn’t want to be ya!” Kay shot over her shoulder as she hurried to her next class.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 49:
“Hhhhhhhaaaaaaavvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeee yoursssssseeeeellllllllfffffffffff a Merry little Christmas,” Julian bellowed over his brandy glass. “Aww. Mr. Crane…,” Theresa bubbled. “I love your Santa hat.” “Tank you,” Julian slurred. “Theresa,” Ethan whined. “A slumber party? A slumber party?” he shook his head. “THIS is what I have to look forward to in my last days,” Ivy muttered under her breath. “Theresa, dear,” she said sweetly. “Would you like some eggnog?” “Oh! Yes, I would,” Theresa said enthusiastically. Ivy poured her a glass and held it out to her. “Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness! They’re here! They’re here!” Theresa squealed. Ivy rolled her eyes and raised the glass to her own lips. “Diddums,” Julian practically purred in her ear. “Want to thake dis party upthairs? I can thing for you. Your wish is my command. What thong would you like to hear?” Julian asked. The bell attached to his red cap made the most annoying noise as his head bobbed up and down. “I think I’m going to be sick,” Ivy gagged. “Ches—NUTS,” Julian’s voice came out as a high squeak as her knee met with a..um…sensitive place. “Roasting on an open fire,” he finished weakly.
“Jenn! You came!” Theresa jumped up and down excitedly. The look on her face matched the deer in the headlights look that seemed to be a permanent _expression on Ethan’s face these past two months. “Amy! Lisa!” “You forgot me!” Kay squealed. Holding her arms out wide. “But…but…” “I’m Ms. Crane’s guest. Aren’t I, Ms. Crane?” Theresa smiled giddily at the sight of Sheridan. “The slumber party wouldn’t be complete without you,” she sighed. “And I brought Simone along as my guest. She’s never seen the inside of the Mansion before,” Kay piped up obnoxiously. Dragging Simone inside. “Julian? What’s wrong with you?” Sheridan asked curiously when she caught sight of her brother hunched over in the corner. “Little Julian isn’t feeling well,” Ivy said dryly. “Little Julian? Mrs. Crane! I didn’t know you and Mr. Crane had a son named Little Julian. Aww….how cute!” Julian swore under his breath as Ivy’s eggnog dripped into his eyes. “Mother!” Ethan exclaimed. “How come you never told me about another brother?” Sheridan rolled her eyes. “This is going to be a long night,” Kay mumbled beside her. “Hey! Where’s the kitchen?”
The doorbell rang, and Theresa scrambled to answer it. “Theresa!” Whitney laughed at the sight of her best friend’s impersonation of a gymnast doing the splits. Theresa grabbed hold of Whitney’s hand. And they knocked heads on the way up. “Sis,” Luis shook his head. “Can’t you keep yourself out of trouble?” Theresa’s brown eyes lit up. “Luis! Wait a minute…why are you here? This party is only for girls. No boys allowed.” Luis’s brown eyes searched the room over for Sheridan. “Uh…I came to keep Ethan company,” Luis came up with a quick answer. “Oh Luis! I’m so happy you want to get closer to Ethan. We really are one big happy family,” Theresa gushed. “Hi Luis,” Ethan said boredly. Luis could practically see the word “HELP” flashing like a neon sign on the kid’s forehead. But hey! It wasn’t his problem. Ethan was the Harvard-educated lawyer. Let him figure this one out on his own. “Sheridan!” Luis lit up like a…well…a Christmas tree when he saw her. “Ooo,” Kay grinned evilly. “This party IS going to be fun. The things we can do, Simone.” “Kay…”
“Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer!” Theresa sang gleefully. Stringing popcorn for the tree. “This is going to look so pretty, isn’t it?” “Yeah,” Ethan said. Popping another kernel into his mouth. Theresa held up her homemade decoration. “That’s weird. It never gets any bigger.” Whitney bit her lip to keep from laughing when Ethan’s face blushed a bright red. “A family trait, I see?” Luis teased. “But red is definitely your color. Doesn’t do too much for the good ole brother-in-law.” “Luis,” Sheridan elbowed him. “Be nice.” “They’re like Dumb and Dumber,” Simone said boredly. “But I can’t tell who’s who?” “Where’s Ivy?” Kay questioned. “I think I saw her…you know what, Kay? I don’t know where she went.” “Come on, Simone. Let’s go upstairs.” Simone looked back at the dwindling circle of people. “…then after we get back from caroling, we’ll come back and watch NSYNC’S Christmas special. Won’t it be so fun, Whit?” “Okay,” Simone agreed readily. “I think they have the right idea,” Sheridan giggled. Watching Kay and Simone disappear up the stairs. “Ms. Crane? Where’s the bathroom?” Lisa, Jenn, and Amy chimed.
“Luis,” Sheridan gasped as her back hit the door. The upstairs bathroom door to be exact. “What?” Luis mumbled against her neck. “Not here,” she managed to squeak. “Come on, Ms. Crane,” Luis whined. “This is so much more fun than…” “Luis!” Sheridan scolded. “Your own sister!” Luis grinned at her. “Yeah, well…” Sheridan laughed and threaded her fingers through his. “Come on. I’ll show you my old room.” “Ooo. Your old room. The possibilities.” “Shut up,” Sheridan giggled against his lips. “Shh,” Luis put a finger to his lips. “I think someone’s outside.” “Kay! Kay Bennett! Where are you taking me? You’re going to get me in trouble again, aren’t you?” Sheridan and Luis scooted down the hall unnoticed. “Bingo!” Kay yelled triumphantly. “What?” Simone asked dumbly.
“I don’t get it.” “This is Theresa’s bathroom.” “What? How? Doesn’t she share a bathroom with Ethan?” “Nope,” Kay shook her head. “Only enough room for her eyeshadow. Her lipstick and blush are in here. With all her other stuff.” “Kay! What is that? Oh my…” Kay cackled devilishly as she put krazy glue around the edges of Theresa’s wand of lipstick. “With any luck…she’ll never be able to say another word.” “Permanent ink in her blush! Kay Bennett…you really are evil incarnate.” “Simone…you wound me.”
“But Whit! Where’d they all go?” Theresa trembled. “Theresa…Honey…” “I know!” Theresa shouted for joy. “Don’t you get it, Whit? Hide and seek! How come I always have to be the one that seeks?” “Mrs. Crane…” Theresa bubbled when Ivy descended the stairs on shaky legs. “Shoo. Hide. I’ll find you.” Ivy arched a golden brow at her daughter-in-law.
Hiding didn’t sound like such a bad idea. “Okay, Dear. Close your eyes,” Ivy played along. When Theresa opened her brown eyes…she was all alone. “This is so much fun!” she cried. Bounding up the stairs. Two at a time. Until the top step jumped right up and hit her in the face. “Ow!” “Dammit!” Jenn hissed down the hall. “The Terminator is on the loose again.” Lisa and Amy’s faces were ghostly pale with fear. “In here,” Jenn motioned. Julian blinked his eyes once. Twice. Three times. “Julian…you muthst have been a good boy. A very good boy,” he grinned idiotically. Hugging himself. “Come in, come in.” Jenn shrugged her shoulders, and Amy and Lisa crept closer and closer. Amy snickered. “Love your Grinch boxers, Mr. Crane.” “Grinch boxers! Oh my god! I…I…I think I’m going to be si--------------------------“ Lisa heaved. “Not on the carpet,” Julian winced. Too late. Oh! What the hell! “Girls…would you care for a drink?” Jenn’s eyes went wide. An adult…practically begging them to drink alcohol. “Sure thing, Mr. Crane,” she smiled. Flopping down on the bed beside him.
“Ethan! Ethan! Where are you?” Whitney called. “Great, Whitney,” she muttered under her breath. “That’s it. Get lost in this big ole mansion.” The Christmas lights blinked outside. A thousand flashes of brilliant color. And Whitney suddenly had an idea. She rubbed her arms roughly at the gust of cold air when she pushed the window open and climbed outside. “Ethan! Mrs. Crane!” “Shut the window, Whitney! Hurry! Quick!” Ethan said in a blind panic. Ivy clutched the thick blanket around her shoulders. “Nice view, isn’t it?” The lights of Harmony twinkled back at them. “Yes. It is,” Whitney agreed. “OH! THIS IS SO MUCH FUN!” Theresa babbled to herself. Ethan shrank back from the window. Not daring to breathe. “Coast clear,” he finally whispered. Exhaling a huge sigh of relief. “I think we’re safe for now,” Ivy agreed. “Marshmallow, Whitney? You’re Dr. Russell’s daughter, aren’t you?” Whitney could only nod dumbly when Ivy produced a thermos of hot chocolate and some mugs. “She never finds us out here,” Ivy said simply.
Sheridan knelt on her knees in front of Luis. “Sher…I feel…I don’t know...” “Shut up, Luis,” Sheridan laughed. Kissing him teasingly on the lips. Luis moaned and kissed her back. “Are you sure you want to do this?” Luis panted. “We waited this long…we can wait a little while longer…” “Luis,” Sheridan smiled. A finger on his swollen lips. “We’ve waited too long. You’re killing me,” she groaned. Running her hands up and down his muscled chest. “I love you. I want to make love to you. With you. As long as I’m with you…that’s all that matters. YOU make it perfect. Not the place. Not the time. Not the..” Luis cut her off with a kiss. One more passionate than the one before it. And eased her back against the pillows. “I love you,” he smiled tenderly in the darkness. Slipping his hands underneath her red sweater and bringing the material up with them. “COME OUT! COME OUT! WHEREVER YOU ARE!” Sheridan shook with laughter. Luis grabbed one of the stuffed animals from the mountain high pile they’d scattered in the floor earlier and crammed it into her mouth to stifle her giggles. She only laughed harder. “AHA!” Theresa threw open the door. “FOUND YOU! Oh my goodness!” she said. Covering her eyes at Sheridan’s appearance. “Ms. Crane…I’m so sorry.”
Simone watched. Entranced as the last of Theresa’s ‘normal’ make-up whirled down the commode. “That’s it,” Kay sighed in satisfaction. “Now she has no other choices…she’ll have to wear this,” she brandished the krazy glue lipstick and permanent ink stained blush. “And only this. She’s going to freak out the little kids at Midnight Mass. She’s going to scare the whole town @!$%less.” Simone dangled her feet back and forth from the bathroom counter. “This bathroom is the size of our kitchen. Can you imagine living like this? It’s so unfair.” “I know,” Kay growled. “The Lethal Weapon stumbles onto all this. But I’m not jealous, Simone. She’s married to Forrest.
Thank God she put him out of commission. I I shudder to think…married to that Dimbulb.” Simone giggled and kicked her feet back and forth. “Jeez, Simone. You’re getting as bad as her,” Kay teased. Stooping down to turn the waist basket right side up. “Hey! What’s this…OH MY GOD! NO FREAKING WAY!” “Kay? What? You’re scaring me,” Simone said in a complete panic. “Ew,” she scrunched up her nose. “It’s a…” “…pregnancy test,” Kay finished. “A pregnancy test? A PREGNANCY TEST! Kay! There’s a plus sign.” “I should just kill myself now. The Terror’s pregnant. This whole world’s going to Hell in a handbasket.” “WHAT did you say?” Ivy demanded.
To Be Continued...
Chapter 50:
“A what?” Luis roared. Ivy’s blue green eyes flashed at him. “A pregnancy test,” Simone whispered. “And it’s positive,” Kay grumbled. “With the kind of gene pool this kid’ll have…Come on, Simone. We have to get to the church quick.” Simone stared at her open-mouthed. “But…” “I’m telling you, Simone. I’m afraid for my life. We have to get to the church.” “Why?” “To pray!” Kay shuddered. “This is awful. This is a nightmare.” Sheridan finally shut HER open mouth. “THERESA!” Luis’s voice echoed down the endless halls. “Luis,” Sheridan placated. “She and Ethan ARE married.” Ivy lifted a shaky hand to her brow. “And it could be…” “THERESA!” A loud crash sounded from…Julian’s room. “I think we found her,” Sheridan said. “Maybe not,” she muttered as Jenn, Lisa, and Amy flew by them “AAAHHHH!!!” “Girls! Oh girls!” Julian called. Staggering out of his bedroom. “Come back! I thought you wanted to be Santa’s elves.” “JULIAN! YOU PIG!” Ivy screeched. “Whitney? Have you seen Theresa?” Luis questioned. Whitney rubbed her arms briskly. “She and Ethan left early for Midnight Mass. Wait a minute…what’s going on?” “I’m not too sure,” Sheridan answered her. Running after Luis. Ivy and Whitney raced after her. Julian stumbled down the stairs. Santa costume and all. “Where’s my reindeer when I need them?”
“Would you stop following me like a lost puppy?” Gwen grumbled. Crossing her arms and walking ahead of Hank. “It’s been like this for the past two months. I should have Luis arrest you for stalking,” she said matter-of-factly. Hank’s grin was so bright…”What? Do I have…what?” she asked anxiously. “Hank…it’s cold out here. And I’m going to be late for…” “Do you really think I’m cute?” Gwen rolled her brown eyes without thinking. “YOU! Always fishing for compliments.” Hank caught her by the arm before she could stalk off. “Do you have fun with me?” he asked. Creeping closer. Gwen was getting more flustered by the minute. “Do you…” “W-W-W-hat?” Gwen gulped. The height difference wasn’t so bad, she told herself. It was kind of nice. Being eye-level with someone.
Without shoes, of course. “You have nice eyes,” she blurted. “You didn’t answer my questions,” Hank smirked. Lifting his hand to her cheek. A soft sigh left Gwen’s lips as his knuckles grazed her cheek. “W-W-W-hat are you doing?” she stammered as his lips inched closer to hers. “Okay…okay…I find you…somewhat attractive,” she muttered. Pushing him away weakly. “Not good enough,” Hank shook his head. Brown eyes twinkling as he leaned in closer. “You’re…dammit Hank! What’s going…” Gwen leaned her forehead against his and took a shaky breath. After one the best kisses of her life. She was sure they could work their way up to mind-blowing with lots of practice. “Yes,” she admitted grudgingly. “To?” “All of the above,” she sighed. Hank grinned in delight. “I love mistletoe, don’t you?”
“Mama,” Theresa bubbled. Looping her arm through Pilar’s. “This is the best Christmas ever! All my dreams have finally come true.” Pilar smiled at her young daughter. She WAS ridiculously happy. Theresa let go of Pilar’s arm and skipped ahead. “ETHAN! Let’s make snow angels!” “Theresita!” Pilar called. To deaf ears. Charity giggled at her side. “She’s such a…” “Child?” Miguel laughed. “Come on, Charity. Let’s go get a seat.” “Pilar,” Eve greeted. “So nice to see you. Theresa’s still on cloud 9, I see.” T.C. looked away in slight embarrassment. “Where’s Luis?” “Right here,” Luis answered. “Mama? Have you seen Theresa? It’s very important I talk to her.” “Mijo…what about? Sheridan?” Sheridan’s blue eyes shied away from Pilar’s scrutiny. “I’m afraid this news is not for the faint of heart,” Ivy quipped. “MR. CRANE! IS THAT YOU?” “Oh dear god…,” Eve muttered in disbelief.
“A Santa suit? I knew you liked to…role-play…but isn’t this taking it a tad too far?” “What did you…Eve? How did you…” UH OH! “Oh! Mr. Crane!” Grace cooed. “The kids are going to LOVE you. How wonderful!” Sam glared at Julian. “You, you naughty boy, are getting a lump of coal in your stocking,” Julian blustered. Playing the part. “Eve? How did you know…” “T.C…Honey…I think it’s time we went inside and got a seat.”
Julian stumbled down the aisle. Ivy hung her head in mortification when he slumped in the pew beside her. “WHY are we here, Diddums?” he hiccuped. “Mr. Crane’s looking a bit green around the gills, don’t you think Simone?” Kay giggled. “I would too. I mean…if I just found out my daughter-in-law—with hot pink cotton candy for brains—was about to pop out the spawn of Forrest Gump’s twin, I wouldn’t just be green around the gills. I…” Simone shifted restlessly in her seat.
“There’s Gwen!” Kay grinned. “With Uncle Hank! They’re holding hands! Actually…she’s trying to shake his off. But…they still make a cute couple. I was thinking…” “This seat taken?” Chad interrupted. A smirk on his lips. The peanut gallery. “No,” Whitney smiled. “Simone doesn’t mind. Do you, Simone?” “Do I mind? NO!” Simone rushed. Kay clamped a hand over her mouth. “Simone! Father Lonagin’s blind. Not deaf!” “HELP ME!” All heads turned to witness Victim #89…900-something topple to the ground. Well…to say it was a domino effect was a huge understatement. “Look at that…Lethal Weapon’s tears are good for something,” Kay snickered. “She put out the fire.” Chad and Simone laughed so hard the pew shook. Whitney couldn’t help a tiny smile.
Sheridan threaded her fingers through Luis’s. “Oh Luis…it’s so beautiful. I hate to think I’ve missed this for so long.” Luis lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her palm. “You won’t have to miss it. Ever again,” he promised. Sheridan cuddled closer. And Luis felt this amazing feeling wash over him. This was right. This was…what he wanted to do forever. Hold her. Be this happy. “Sheridan,” he whispered in her ear. Unable to stop himself. “This is the best Christmas.” Her blue eyes smiled up at him. “It is,” she said softly. “I want all my Christmases to be like this,” he said. Reaching over and taking both her hands in his. “Luis,” she laughed self-consciously. “What are you doing? And why are you doing it in the middle of Christmas Mass?” Luis’s brown eyes looked away in embarrassment. “Everyone’s looking. Aren’t they?” Kay gave them a thumbs-up sign. And Theresa bounced giddily.
When did the girl not bounce with excitement, Sheridan wondered. Pilar watched them with careful eyes. “Yes,” she blushed. “No one’s paying attention to Father Lonagin.” “We can’t have that,” Luis smiled. Tugging her after him down the aisle. Kay, Simone, Chad, Whitney…everyone nearly broke their necks trying to see what was happening. Except Theresa, that is. Theresa…well, she just jumped to her feet and skipped down the aisle after them. “Theresita,” Pilar hissed. “Come back.”
“Luis,” Sheridan stared at his handsome face in open astonishment as he led her outside.
Under the stars. And softly falling snow. “What is this all about?” “Sheridan…Marry me,” Luis blurted. “M-M-Marry you,” Sheridan sputtered. “You want me to marry you?” Luis’s face fell. “You don’t want to. It’s too soon. I’m sorry. I mean…I don’t even have a ring for you. I was…it’s just…your face in the candlelight. The sparkle in your eyes. The feeling I get when I’m with you, Sheridan,” he said quietly. Brushing a snowflake from her blond hair. “There’s never been anything like it. And I know there never will. I want to capture this feeling. So that it never ends. But I shouldn’t have…I jumped the gun. We haven’t known each other that long. I’m sorry…” “Luis,” Sheridan laughed lightheartedly. Happy tears shimmering in her blue eyes. “It’s okay, Sheridan. Really. I understand. I…” “YES! Yes, I’ll marry you,” Sheridan exclaimed. Throwing her arms around Luis’s neck. “Yes?” “Yes,” she repeated. “Have you ever seen ‘Jerry Maguire’, Luis?” A slow grin spread over Luis’s face. “You had me from ‘hello’,” Sheridan kissed his lips gently. Her radiant smile making her glow. “Really?” Luis teased. “Really,” Sheridan kissed him again.
“Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness!” Theresa burst back through the church’s doors yelling. Father Lonagin paused mid-sermon, and all eyes turned to the exuberant girl. “LUIS JUST ASKED MS. CRANE TO MARRY HIM. AND SHE SAID ‘YES’!” “YES!” Kay shouted. “Sorry, Father Lonagin,” she apologized. Father Lonagin smiled. “No need. Such news as this…is good news indeed. And calls for celebration. AFTER Midnight Mass,” he said gently. “Sheridan must be so happy,” Gwen smiled at Hank. “Luis, too. Are you happy?” he asked. Brown eyes studying her. She thought about their earlier kiss. “Yeah…I’m happy.” Grace beamed from ear to ear. And Sam couldn’t help a smile himself. Maybe not all Cranes were bad. “Ethan,” Theresa bubbled. Plopping down beside him. “Isn’t this the best news?” “Best news?” Julian grumbled.
“My sister. Married to Officer Low—Lopez-Fitzgerald,” he amended at Ethan’s pointed look. “I’m sure nothing can top that,” he mumbled. Voice dripping with sarcasm. “Think again, Julian,” Ivy said. Not without a small measure of glee at his pending hours and days and months and years of torture. “Luis is not the only new member of the Crane family.” Julian puffed out his chest. Looking utterly ridiculous dressed as old Saint Nick. “Really, Diddums? What can possibly ruin my Christmas more?” Ivy crossed her arms about her chest. “I’m pregnant,” she announced with a shudder. “PREG-----PREG---“. And all the little children of Harmony screamed in horror when Santa Claus passed out cold. “MOMMY! WHAT ABOUT MY PRESENTS?”
Graduation Day---Epilogue to School Daze
“Dumb…dumb, dumb, dumb, ddduuummmbbb, dumb. Dumb…dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,” Kay hummed under her breath as Harmony’s graduating class of 2000 plodded along the entire perimeter of the football field to get to the podium! “Kay,” Jessica pinched her arm. “Ouch!” Kay grumbled. “Do that again and you’re toast, Jess,” she warned. Jessica rolled her eyes at her older sister. “You won’t think it’s so dumb next year when it’s you.” “Whatever,” Kay shot back. “At this rate…damn Theresa! Did you see that?” Kay hissed as a hush went over the crowd. “ETHAN!” Theresa waved wildly. Conveniently forgetting to watch WHERE she was going. “She plowed Jenn over like a Mack truck,” Kay shook her head. “Lethal Weapon strikes again.”
Simone snickered. “Kay…I hope you know you’re being taped,” she told her. Pointing the video cam right at her. “Dr. Russell…Coach Russell…you should seriously consider taking out a life insurance policy on Whitney. Being Theresa’s best friend is simply not safe. It’s detrimental to her physical health. And I’m not even going to go into the mental health aspects. Let’s just say Theresa…O-H…M-Y…G-O-D! Reese FINALLY made it!” Simone followed her best friend with the camera…OKAY, she thought. Zooming back in on her sister’s happy face. That kiss was NOT PG-13! Mrs. Bennett would surely suffer a case of hysterical blindness, and Chief Bennett might never let Kay out of the house again.
Eh…Whitney’s smile was frozen in place as Principal Reid stammered over the list of the Graduating Class of 2000’s accomplishments. When he called out Theresa’s name as Homecoming Queen, she stood on shaky legs and squealed “ETHAN!” “I almost feel sorry for him,” Kay muttered. “The Tammy Faye look is back in full force. It’s a damn shame. All that makeup. Just drizzling down her face…look at her gown, Simone. It looks like a friggin’ rainbow!” “Rainbows are so pretty,” Charity sighed. “But not as pretty as you, Charity,” Miguel parroted. Kay and Simone looked at each other. And all they could do was laugh. “Miguel? Are you sure you weren’t accidentally transported from the early 1950’s to the year 2000 in a freak accident or scientific experiment a la ‘Back To The Future’?” “Good one, Reese,” Chad chuckled.
“Look! There’s Uncle Hank! Hey Uncle Hank! Gwen! Up here!” “Kay,” Simone frowned. Pointing at the video cam once more. “Gwen,” Kay yanked Gwen down beside her. “Anything important you want to tell me?” she smirked. Raising her hand up eye-level and giving it careful inspection. “Uncle Hank! Get your hiney in gear! I thought you were going…” Hank’s hand motions were frantic. “Going to what?” Gwen looked at her with sparkling brown eyes. “Oh! It’s too late, Uncle Hank. She knows! She knows already! You sneak!” Gwen’s cheeks turned the most amazing hue of red Kay had ever seen. “Knows what?” Hank played dumb. “Simone! Get this on tape! Forget about Whitney and the Terminator! This is SO much better than watching Theresa crying buckets and washing the whole population of Harmony away in a freak flash flood.” “Hank…,” Gwen knelt on bended knee.
“I got tired of waiting,” she smiled mischievously. “So I thought I’d take matters into my own hands. Will you marry me?” A slow, lazy grin broke out over Hank’s face, and his brown eyes darted around to make sure EVERYONE was looking. Kay slapped his arm. “Say something before she turns blue down there. A person can only hold their breath so long.” “Yeah. I’ll marry you,” he finally answered. “We don’t do anything normal, do we?” he laughed as he pulled a ring box out of his trouser pocket. Gwen’s eyes sparkled with happiness as he slipped the diamond on her finger. “You’re too damn short to do the whole one knee thing.”
Simone panned the video around the crowd. Searching for one person…er, make that couple in particular. The soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Lopez-Fitzgerald! “Ah…the Honeymooners. Geez! You’d think they’d save something for the actual honeymoon,” Kay commented. “Twenty bucks says they haven’t even done IT yet.” “So concerned with others’ sex lives,” Gwen shook her head disapprovingly. “Uh!” Charity gasped. “Oh, Gwen,” Kay grinned. “I forgot to tell you…you’re not allowed to talk about S-E-X in front of Pollyanna and Jimmy Bean,” she hissed. “Charity thinks ‘Happily Ever After’ is it. Fini. Kaput. She has no clue what goes on the wedding night.
And I’m beginning to think Miguel doesn’t either. Such a shame. I mean…look at the role model he had. Luis is Ms. Crane’s own personal sex god.” Gwen’s shoulders shook with laughter. “Would you look at them? If Principal Reid wasn’t so busy trying to keep Theresa on two feet, he’d fire her for sure.” “Wow!” Jessica whispered. “Cover your eyes, Jessica,” Gwen snorted. “You’re too young to see THAT.” “Father Lonagin’ll probably have to physically break them apart tomorrow at the wedding,” Kay muttered. “Weddings are so beautiful,” Charity sighed blissfully. “But not as beautiful as you, Charity,” Miguel grinned goofily.
“This has got to be the biggest group of dumbasses in the history of Harmony,” Kay sighed heavily. “I mean, for Theresa to be 3rd in her class…” “I heard there used to be a landfill around here not too long ago,” Reese quirked a brow at his girlfriend. “THAT explains it!” “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…BROTHERS AND SISTERS…HUSBANDS AND WIVES…” “Ahem,” Principal Reid cleared his throat. Theresa’s brown eyes glittered with tears, and her shaking was visible even from where they were sitting. On the very top row! “I ALWAYS BELIEVED IN FATE SINCE I WAS A TINY, BEAUTIFUL LITTLE GIRL GROWING UP DREAMING ABOUT MARRYING THE MAN OF MY DREAMS. HI ETHAN!” she paused to wave at her hubby.
“She still ain’t legal,” Kay mused. “If this town wasn’t full of morons…most of present company excluded, legislature would pass making it illegal for her and Dimbulb to procreate.” “IT WAS MY DESTINY TO BECOME MRS. ETHAN CRANE. FATE MADE ME WHAT I AM TODAY.” “Fate Schmate. Yeah. Good one, Stalkerita.” “Kay!” Simone hissed. “…WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW HONORED I AM…” “Blah, blah, blah. You know what would really be hell? Ethan running for political office. And Theresa,” Kay shuddered violently, “being his First Lady.”
“Hey! Ms. Crane and Loverboy are leaving,” Kay stood up. “No fair. Come on, Reese,” she tugged him by the hand. Reese gasped for air as he tried to keep up with Kay. “Luis!” Kay scolded. “Leaving your own sister’s graduation ceremony? I want to come,” she whined. “Me, too,” Simone pleaded. The video cam still rolling. “Sheridan? What’s going on?” Gwen asked. “Ivy’s in labor. Right now,” Sheridan rushed. “We have to get to the hospital.” “Wait for me!” Eve flagged them down. “YOU’RE Ivy Crane’s doctor?” Kay said incredulously. “Dr. Ruth is out of town,” Eve explained. “And I’m on call.” “We can’t all fit into Luis’s jeep,” Kay grumbled. “Where’s Dad? This is NOT the kind of thing you can be late for.” “That’s why Sheridan’s going to drive,” Luis smirked. “Oh no! You can’t be serious! She’s a terrible driver!” “Thanks for the vote of confidence, Kay,” Sheridan rolled her blue eyes. Turning the key in the ignition. “I’m here,” Sam yelled. “Hop on, Eve,” Sam ordered. Revving up Miguel’s motorcycle. “I’ll get you to the hospital in time!” Kay rubbed her eyes with her fists, and Jessica grabbed hold of her arm for support. “This is surreal.”
Somehow they all made it to the hospital in one piece. “OOOOOHHHHH! OOOOOHHHHH!” a pitiful voice moaned. “This is all your fault!” “Dirty Old Man!” Kay shouted. “Ivy!” Sheridan laughed. The entire gang raced down the hall. “Simone!” Kay grinned deviously. “You have got to get THIS on tape.” Simone blanched. “Uh…no thanks!” Kay took the camcorder from her hands and ducked behind Eve. “Kay Bennett! You’re not allowed in here.” “He,” Kay pointed at Julian, “hired me to tape this blessed event.” Ivy snatched a clamp from the nurse’s hands and started beating Julian over the head with it. “See? Primo evidence for the murder trial,” Kay piped up. “Uh! You disgusting pig!” Ivy screamed. “I hate you! I hate you!” “DIDDUMS!” Julian held his hands over his head defensively. “But I don’t hate you.” Ivy’s blue green eyes softened. For a millisecond! Make that a millisecond of a millisecond. “Push Ivy! Push!” “Uh…EWWW!” Kay covered her eyes with her hands. “I think you’re an awesome lady, Mrs. Crane. But I never wanted to know you THAT well.”
Outside in the waiting room…Sheridan rested comfortably in Luis’s lap. Nuzzling his cheek. “I love you, Luis. I can’t wait…” “Can’t wait ‘til what?” Luis asked with an engaging smile. Sheridan lifted a hand to his face and traced his features lovingly. “I can’t wait to start a family together.” Luis wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer. “Me, either.” “They’re so sweet,” Gwen sighed. “What?” Hank shrugged his shoulders. “And we’re not sweet?” Gwen snorted. “Hardly,” she ran her fingers through his brown hair. “But that’s how I like it.” “Babies are such gifts,” Charity smiled a saccharine smile. “But not as much…” “Would you please can it?” Jessica shouted. “We get it! You’re in love! Big deal.” “Way to go, Jess,” Simone gave her a high five.
“OH MY GOODNESS! OH MY GOODNESS!” Theresa cried frantically. “WE DIDN’T MISS ANYTHING, DID WE?” Ethan caught her before she did the splits on the hospital floor. “AAAAAHHHHH!!! JULIAN!!! I’M GOING TO KILL YOU AS SOON AS EVE GETS THIS THING OUT OF ME!” “Oh my god! It’s got a brandy stuck to its lips! Oh! That’s a hand! Thank goodness! How embarrassing would that be?” Kay’s snickering could be heard plainly. Followed by a baby’s lusty screams. “It’s a girl!” Kay ducked her head out to announce.
“A really big girl,” she grinned later. “!0 pounds! Brandy Champagne Crane!” “Poor kid,” Luis commiserated. “Julian had a concussion. He wasn’t…nevermind,” Sheridan rolled her eyes. “Julian’s never been in his right mind.” “What’s Ivy’s excuse?” Gwen smiled when the…well…tiny just wasn’t the appropriate word…baby grasped her pinkie. “With a name like that,” Reese shook his head. “Mr. Crane will never drink a drop again.” “Ooo,” Jessica cooed. “She has Mrs. Crane’s eyes.” “Excuse me,” Eve knocked on the door. “I think the ‘happy’ family deserves their rest now. It’s been a long, trying day.” Simone backed out of the room. Capturing it all on film. “That’s it, Kids. I hope you enjoyed my public announcement. And remember…always use protection. Or this…,” she stretched her arms out to reveal Ivy passed out on the hospital bed. Drool clearly visible. Julian. Unconscious in the bed beside her (Mrs. Crane was a woman of her word; the arraignment was set for next week). “…could be the result. The happy family,” Kay sighed. “CUT!” This was one graduation video she couldn’t wait to see. :)
THE END