A/N: This story was written for a challenge on another site. Jimmy Hickok was not having a good day. First thing this morning, Teaspoon told him that he was going to be sent on a special run to Ft. Laramie and that he would be leaving at first light the next morning. He would be gone almost a week with having to wait for a package that was being sent from Sacramento to the main offices and the ride back. After breakfast, he had headed out to the barn to do his assigned chores. While mucking out Sundance’s stall, the bale of hay that Ike was getting from the loft fell down on Jimmy, knocking him flat on his stomach. Once he’d brushed himself off, having sent a glaring look at Ike who apologized profusly hands signing faster then Jimmy cared to read. He finished with cleaning the stall and went to find Teaspoon to see if there was anything else he needed to do. On the way out of the barn, he ran into Lou who was on her way to get Lightning ready for her run within the next hour. She gave him a withering look as she huffed past him. “Still mad about yesterday…” he mumbled, getting angry all over again about the fight they had had the evening before. She and Kid had been broken up for several weeks now and Kid had started seeing the new school teacher. Lou had been upset about some remark Kid had made to her when they were in town on an errand for Rachel and she’d been venting to Jimmy about it. “I don’t see what you’re all riled up about anyhow, Lou. You and Kid ain’t been together for a while now. He’s free to see whoever he likes and so are you,” Jimmy said gruffly. He was tired of her running to him with tales of what Kid and Samantha were doing but couldn’t bring himself to tell her so directly. Lou was hurt by Jimmy’s tone and how he seemed to be defecting to Kid’s corner. Narrowing her eyes, she threw at him, “As long as it’s you that I see, right?” Her jaw muscle tightened as he turned to look at her, anger flaring in his brown eyes. “I ain’t never said that and you know it!” he said loudly, fists clentching. “Oh, you don’t have to say it Jimmy. Everyone knows now that Kid’s out of the picture you plan on taking his place!” Lou stood daring him to contradict her. A dangerous calm settled over Jimmy as he scowled at her. “If the thought of seeing me is so distasteful to you, all you had to do was say so. I wouldn’t want to force myself upon you,” he gave her one last glare and stalked off into the darkness, returning late after everyone else had turned in for the night. Angry at himself for not controlling his emotions with Lou the night before, he kicked a rock with his boot and swore to himself. Teaspoon noticed the sullen young man heading his way and wondered what was going on. He had witnessed the encounter with Lou and was surprised at the way the two riders had looked at each other. ‘Wonder what burr’s got into them two now?’ Looking up from the ground, Jimmy noticed Teaspoon watching him. “Teaspoon, I’m done with my chores. You got anything else you need done?” Clearing his throat, Teaspoon hooked his thumbs in his suspenders and leaned back on his heels. “Now that you mention it Jimmy, I do got somethin’ you could do for me. The wheel for the wagon needs taken down to the wheelwrights to get a spoke replace and a new rim. Mind doin’ that for me?” Already heading towards the wheel that was proped against the tack room wall, he called back, “Sure thing, Teaspoon. I’ll take care of it.” As Jimmy started rolling the wheel towards town, Teaspoon told him, “You might want to get anything you need for your trip while you wait.” Since rolling the wheel two blocks was less trouble then hitching up the other wagon and loading into the bed, so Jimmy waved at Teaspoon’s suggestion and kept going.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ The wheel was delivered and Jimmy headed towards Tompkin’s store. Once his purchases were made he headed back to the wheelwrights, planning on waiting in the shade of the building until the wheel was ready.He’d been sitting on a barrel outside the shop about fifteen minutes, munching on a piece of jerked beef when he noticed Kid barrling his way. From the way Kid’s fists clentched and the frown upon his face, Jimmy was sure he was about to get into it with the Southerner again. When Kid was only feet from him, Jimmy looked up with one eye closed due to the glare of the sun up above. “Kid,” he said more cheery than he felt. “Why’d you have to go and say something like that?” Kid demanded, ignoring the bag of jerked beef Jimmy held out to him. Rolling his eyes, Jimmy set the bag down next to the gunpowder asking, “What’d I say and to who?” “Lou!” Kid said as if that explained everything. There was no way he’d admit to Jimmy that he had no idea what he and Lou had talked about the night before. All he knew was that she’d been crying when she came running in and refused to tell him what was the matter. “Humph! Should have known it’d be about Lou. For someone who doesn’t care for her anymore, you sure don’t act like it. What me and Lou talked about is between the two of us. Not between you, me and her.” “And what was I suppose to have said to her that’s got you so upset?” Jimmy stood up, ready to defend himself. Shaking his head in disbelief, Kid gritted his teeth. “You know damn well what you said to her. I ain’t never seen her cry like she did last night! You promised you’d never hurt her, you liar!” “Take that back Kid,” Jimmy growled taking a step towards his friend. He was in no mood to have Kid take him to task on his treatment of Lou. When Kid remained silent and glaring Jimmy taunted, “Like you should talk with the way you hurt her…” In a blurr of blue, Kid threw the first punch. Jimmy dodged out of the way. Kid’s fist barely grazed his shoulder. For several minutes the two fought, angry words pouring out between grunts and gulped breaths. The two men were equally matched until Kid’s fist connected with Jimmy’s stomach, making him double over. “Why, I aughta kill you…” Jimmy threatened. No longer caring whether they beat the hell out of each other or not, Jimmy let his anger loose with a growl. The sound of the fight brought the men working in the wheelwright’s shop out to see what the commotion was about. For a few moments, they stood back watching the two men fighting. Through the red haze clouding his mind, Jimmy continued to beat Kid, even thought a voice in his head told him to stop. It wasn’t until Jimmy had Kid against the wall of the shop, head lolling to the side that the workers moved to pry Jimmy away from the unconcious man. Restrained by two of the men, Jimmy felt his anger start to fade.The sight of Kid being propped between two other men, bloodied and beaten, not moving filled him with terror. Kid was laid on the ground and one of the men felt for a pulse. “He’s alive, but barely,” the man said looking over to Jimmy. “What in God’s name were you thinking?” Jimmy just stared at the man who was suppose to be his best friend. ‘Friends don’t do that to friends,’ he told himself as his stomach began to retch. The two men holding his arms let him go as he ran to the bushes where he lost his breakfast. By the time he could stand up straight again, Teaspoon had arrived along with the doctor. The horrified look upon the station master’s face caused Jimmy to close his eyes. He could feel the blood drain from his face as Teaspoon turned with a horrified look towards him. He was sure that Kid would die because of him and his jealousy over the woman they both loved. Teaspoon marched over to where he stood and grabbed his arm tightly. “What the hell happened here? I…I can’t believe what I’m seeing…Doc says Kid’s real bad. He don’t know if he’s gonna make it!” Jimmy’s head bowed. There was nothing he could say to Teaspoon to make him understand. ‘Hell, I don’t understand…’ he thought, dread filling his soul. “Teaspoon? I’m gonna get these men to carry Kid over to my office. I need to tend to him as soon as possible and outside in the dirt isn’t the place to do it,” the doctor called over to them. “I’ll be right with you, Doc,” Teaspoon said, concern filling his voice as he glanced at the young man laying on the ground. His voice filled with barely restrained anger, Teaspoon barked, “I want you to get back to the station right now and stay put until I return. You and me are gonna have a long talk about what’s happened here. Now git!” Teaspoon pushed Jimmy away from him, knowing he would do as he was told. The grief and worry over Kid that he was feeling would see to it. “Easy, easy there boys,” Teaspoon said worriedly. “How bad is he doc?” That was the last thing Jimmy heard before turning and running blindly towards the express station.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Jimmy sat out in the barn, his emotions running the gauntlet from anger to helplessness to dispair. He stayed there, sitting on a bale of hay, not willing to go into the bunkhouse where the others were eating lunch by now, unaware of what he had done. He couldn’t face them with them not knowing what he had done to Kid and not being able to explain why it had happened.He watched as the shadows stretched across the yard. It had been telling him it had been hours since he had left Kid in Teaspoon and the doctor’s care. It was killing him not to know what was going on with Kid. “Ha!,” he laughed “Killing me? Yeah right! The only one who came close to being killed was Kid!” he sat silently for a few moments before muttering, “If he ain’t already dead by now…” Just then, a shadow filled the door of the barn. With the sun behind the silouette, Jimmy couldn’t tell who was there. “He ain’t dead, but perty damn near to it!” Teaspoon’s anger was being held in check, but only by a thread. “Doc says it’s one of the worst beatings he’s ever saw.” Walking into the barn, Teaspoon continued, “By rights, as marshal, I should be hauling you off to jail ‘bout now, son.” “Why ain’t ya?” Jimmy said quietly, not sure what was going to happen to him. He hoped that Teaspoon would throw the book at him, lock him up and throw away the key. Whatever the man decided was to be his punishment, he would take it without complaint. Though nothing anyone else could do to him would ever compare to what he was putting himself through. Teaspoon stood, hands on hips looking at the sorry sight in front of him. Disgust for what had happened between the two riders made him bark at Jimmy, “March! Right now, into the bunkhouse with you!” Head hung, Jimmy’s shoulder’s slumped as he stood and slowly made his way past his boss. “Quit draggin’ your feet!” Teaspoon ordered. Hearing yelling outside, the other riders gathered on the porch and watched in confusion as Teaspoon gave Jimmy a push towards them with no argument from him. “Teaspoon?” Lou asked with a confused look as Jimmy walked past her without a glance. She’d noticed the bruise on his cheek and the split lip, guessing he’d been in another fight. Teaspoon closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh. He looked to the bewildered faces that were waiting for an explanination. He motioned them to follow him inside. As they filed in, they noticed that Jimmy had taken a seat at the far end of the table and was staring glummly at his hands. Teaspoon pointed for them to sit also. Rachel, who had been finishing putting some vegtables in a stew for dinner, wiped her hands on a towel, asking with a concerned voice, “Teaspoon? Is there something wrong?” Tilting his hat back, Teaspoon took a deep breath. He knew that what he was about to say would effect all of them in many ways. Before he could speak, Buck asked, “Where’s Kid?” Jimmy cringed as Teaspoon cleared his throat ignoring the question. “Rachel, why don’t you have a seat too.” Once the housekeeper had pulled a chair up to the table, he stood at the head of the table and began. “Seems there was an altercation earlier today in town between two men. One of them is barely alive.” He paused for a moment letting his words sink. Cody voiced what the others were thinking. “What’s that got to do with us?” Teaspoon fixed his gaze upon the man at the other end of the table. “Jimmy, why don’t you tell them what it’s got to do with them?” All eyes turned towards Jimmy, waiting. Jimmy clentched his teeth, seething inside. He felt angry enough with himself but now some of that anger was directed at the station master. Teaspoon stared him down, eyes never wavering. Finally, Jimmy could take it no longer. He stood up so quickly that his chair fell over backwards, the loud thud causing several of the others to jump. “Fine! I’ll tell them if that’s what you want!” he yelled. “The two men…they was me and Kid,” he cried. His heart broke when he heard Lou gasp, her hand flying to her mouth in disbelief. “What?” Noah asked, not sure he was following the conversation correctly. “Are you saying that Kid’s barely alive and Jimmy’s the cause?” he looked from Jimmy to Teaspoon for conformation. Teaspoon nodded. The riders all started talking at once. Lou got to her feet but Teaspoon stopped her from leaving the table with a curt, “Sit down Lou. Kid can’t see anyone right now. When the doc has any news, he’ll send word.” Lou was about to protest, tears flowing freely when Rachel held an arm out, motioning for her to come sit by her. Lou went to the woman, crying softly into her shoulder as Teaspoon began talking. “Kid’s in real bad shape. Doc say’s he ain’t seen anyone as bad as Kid is right now. What I want to know is how he got that way?” He raised an eyebrow as he looked to where Jimmy was sitting low in his seat, wishing he could just disappear. The male riders looked towards their friend, expecting to be told what had transpired. Tears were falling from Jimmy’s brown eyes as he looked at them. “I don’t know how it happened. Not exactly. Kid started arguing with me, one thing led to another then we were fighting. Next thing I know, he’s lying on the ground with one of the wheelwrights saying that he’s alive, but barely…” “How could you?” Lou said lifting her head from Rachel’s soulder, her voice filled with anger and disgust. “Kid was your best friend!” “Lou…” he started to say and fell silent at the look of hate she gave him. The others just looked at him with disbelief. “In light of what’s happened, I have no choice but to keep you here in Rock Creek. Noah, you’ll be taking the Ft. Laramie run and then onto the main offices. Jimmy, I think it would be best if you come down to the jail with me.” “Oh, Teaspoon…are you sure?” Rachel asked tears in her eyes at the mess two of her ‘boys’ were in. “’Fraid so, Rachel. At least until we know if Kid will make it.” At his statement, Lou started sobbing loudly. She ran over to Kid’s bunk, throwing herself down upon it. Teaspoon watched as Lou sobbed, clentching Kids pillow tightly, his heart filled with sorrow for what she was going through. “No, don’t!” Noah yelled as the Jimmy took his Navy colt from it’s holster and held it to his head, crying as he told them, “Stay back or I swear I’ll do it!” “Teaspoon!” one of the riders called, not sure how to handle the problem at hand. Teaspoon was momentairily shocked as he watched Jimmy put his gun to his head. With a slight nod of his head to Buck, he started to move forward, calmly talking to Jimmy. “Now, son. You don’t want to be goin’ ‘n doin’ somethin’ that we’ll all regret. Why don’t you put the gun down on the table…” Seeing that Teaspoon held Jimmy’s attention, Buck and Noah looked at each other giving a slight nod before they both rushed Jimmy. Buck wrestled the gun from his hand as Noah pinned him against the wall. Cody rushed to help Noah as Jimmy struggled to get free. “No-o-o…” Jimmy yelled, slumping to the floor in grief. “Why didn’t you let me do it?” he sobbed, not able to face what he did to their friend any longer. Lou had looked up at the hollering, eyes wide as she seen Jimmy put his gun to his head. She screamed, jumping off the bed. She intended to help the others but Teaspoon moved quicker then she did. Taking the gun from Buck, he handed it back to Rachel. “Get that out of here!” Rachel flew through the door, taking the gun and Lou with her. “But Rachel, they need me…” Lou protested, not wanting to leave the bunkhouse. “Let the men handle this,” Rachel said sadly, pulling Lou towards the house.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ “You want us to restrain him, Teaspoon?” Cody asked, still holding Jimmy’s arm in a tight grip.“No, you boys go ahead and let go of him,” Teaspoon waved them aside. Stooping down infront of the dejected young man, he spoke quietly. “Son, I know you is feelin’ real bad about what happened but killin’ yourself don’t do nobody any good. It won’t help Kid none and right now, he needs all of us. He needs our prayers to help him heal. He needs his family, his friends and you are one of them.” “But Teaspoon,” Jimmy stuttered, “I did this to Kid! He won’t want me around him anymore…” Sighing, Teaspoon laid a hand on his shoulder. He knew some of the pain and recriminations the man was going through, having been in a similar situation once when he was younger himself. “Though you and Kid have had your disagreements in the past, he’s still your best friend. Just like you’re his.” Looking up with lost eyes, Jimmy whispered, “But friends don’t do what I did…” The others watched as Jimmy broke down, sobbing loudly. Teaspoon waved them away as he gathered the young man in his arms. Jimmy held on tightly, letting all his tears out as Teaspoon held him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ An hour later Teaspoon walked with Jimmy down towards the jail, neither of them speaking as they went.Buck and Cody were already there waiting for them. They had went by the doctor’s office first to see if there was any change in Kids condition. He was still unconcious, but the doctor was hopeful. Teaspoon led Jimmy over to the front cell, motioning him inside. “I want your belt,” he said as Jimmy went into the cell without protest. “Why you want that?” Cody asked as Jimmy began to remove the belt. “Not now,” Buck whispered nudging the blond rider in the side. Cody threw him a dirty look but let it drop. “How’s Kid?” Teaspoon asked as he put Jimmy’s belt into one of the desk drawers. “Doc said there isn’t much change. He’s optimistc that Kid’ll make it though. His breathing is still shallow but he’s gotten a little color back,” Buck told him. The three men stood watching as Jimmy laid down on the cot, staring up at the ceiling. “I think we should all take turns staying with him tonight,” Teaspoon said quietly. “Buck you take the first watch. Cody will relieve you at midnight.” Buck nodded. Cody simply said, “Fine,” which surprised the station master, knowing how much the blond man hated missing his sleep. “Good. We’ll head on back to the station.” Taking one last look at Jimmy, Teaspoon shook his head. He still was having a hard time believeing in what had happened between him and Kid.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ When Teaspoon arrived, Cody was sitting quietly, reading a dime novel, trying to cover his yawns. Teaspoon was proud of the boy. He’d figured he’d find Cody leaned back in the chair, boots on the desk, sound asleep.“Been quiet,” Cody told him wiping his face with a hand. “Makes it hard to stay awake but I didn’t close my eyes, not once.” “Good work, son,” Teaspoon whispered patting him on the shoulder. Tilting his head towards the cell he asked, “He been sleeping long?” “Nah. Only ‘bout an hour. Just been lying there staring at the ceiling, not saying a word.” Concern crossed Teaspoons faces as he questioned, “You didn’t go botherin’ him with all sorts of questions, did you?” Cody stood up tall, taking offense at even being asked that. “Of course not! Regardless of what the others think, I ain’t no idiot Teaspoon. I know when to keep quiet.” “I know, I know. Thank you. Why don’t you go one home and get some sleep. Noah’s off in a few hours to Ft. Laramie so I need you to take the next scheduled run.” “Don’t worry Teaspoon. We’ll take care of things at the station. You just keep an eye on him and Kid.” With a wave, Cody disappeared out the back door and into the dark. Teaspoon lowered the wick on the lantern. The settling himself comfortably in his chair, pushed his hat over his eyes, laced his fingers together and promptly fell asleep.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Rachel brought both men breakfast around seven, telling them that Noah had left on schedule and Cody was getting ready for his run. Buck would be by shortly with Lou, they had gone to see the doctor and to find out how Kid was.Teaspoon had just finished the last of his biscuits with jelly when the two riders came in with big smiles on their faces, bringing good news. Lou blurted out excitedly, “Kid’s awake! He’s weak but he’s gonna make it!” “Thank god!” Rachel breathed a sigh of relief, clapping her hands happily. Teaspoon gave Lou a hug, smiling at Buck who let Rachel hug him in celebration. “Doc let us see him for a minute. He’s still got a long way to go, but he’s going to be fine.” Buck walked over to the cell where Jimmy sat in silence since they walked through the door. “Kid asked me to tell you something, Jimmy. He said he ain’t mad at you. He knows it isn’t all your fault what happened. He’s to blame too, “ Buck told him quietly. Jimmy looked at him with a solemn face. “Glad to hear he’s gonna be alright.” Teaspoon went over to the cell and unlocked it, opening the door. “Why don’t you go see him, son.” “I can’t Teaspoon. Not yet…” Jimmy wasn’t ready to forgive himself for what he had done. He’d spent the night praying, something he seldom done over the last few years. He’d asked god that Kid’s life be spared, that he wouldn’t be the cause of the young man’s death, but he couldn’t ask for forgivness for what he had done. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to forgive himself, even if Kid did one day. During the night, he had come to the decision to leave Rock Creek. To leave the Pony Express. To leave the only real family he had ever had. Never again would he hurt one of them in anger. He was afraid he couldn’t control himself anymore. The only solution was to go away. Accepting the belt that Teaspoon had retrieved from the desk drawer, he threaded it through the loops of his trousers. Telling the others he was heading back to the bunkhouse, he left them still talking excitedly about Kid’s prognosis. “No, I won’t let anything like this happen again…” he murmured. Without a second glance at those he considered his family, Jimmy went to gather his belongings and his horse. “There’s no way I’ll ever let this happen again.” He’d just saddled Sundance and was leading him from the barn when Rachel returned from town. She paused on the porch of the house for a moment watching him. When she realized that he was packed for travel, she hurried down the steps and across the yard, intending to stop him. Hearing footsteps, Jimmy looked up from checking the cinch on his saddle. It was Rachel and she didn’t look very happy. “Don’t try stoppin’ me Rachel. My minds made up!” he barked. “Jimmy, you know that running ain’t gonna solve anything. Why don’t you put your things away. Go talk to Kid. He’s been asking to see you,” she pleaded, not wanting the young man to leave. Swinging himself up on his horse, Jimmy looked down at her with sad eyes. “I almost killed him because of my temper. I can’t face him. Not now. It’s best that I just go. This way, I won’t hurt anyone else I love. Ever.” Rachel reached out a hand to him, but he ignored it. Clicking his heels against Sundance’s flanks he rode away without another word. Standing in the middle of the station yard, Rachel was helpless to stop him. She wished Teaspoon or one of the others were there. Maybe they could have talked some sense into him. Calling out one last time, “Jimmy!” Rachel ran after him, but he didn’t stop or look back. She stopped as he disappeared from sight wondering how she was going to tell the others Jimmy was gone.
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