Disclaimer: I don't own anything, I'm not making money off of this, so everyone at Warner Bros. and their whole menagerie of people over there can just leave me alone. :) Again, I need to give total inspiration to a song; this time "One True Friend" by Bette Midler. Thanks to Christine and Jenn for that. Also, thanks to Michelle and Aly for editing. Feedback always welcome. Enjoy! Until Forever

Until Forever

"Good morning," I said to Kerry as I walked into the kitchen and poured a cup of coffee.

"Morning," she replied. "Why are you up so early? You aren't on for another two hours."

"I'm going out to breakfast with Lucy," I replied.

I saw Kerry get an odd look on her face before saying, "Carter, I know I've said this before, but I --"

"Don't worry, Lucy and I are just friends, just like you and I are friends," I replied, knowing where the conversation was headed.

Kerry smiled. "I wasn't even going to say that. I was just going to say to be careful. I would be willing to keep your secret, but don't expect everyone else to. Anyway, go, have fun. I'll see you later at work today."

I smiled back at her. "See you later also. Bye," I said, grabbing my coat and walking out the door.

It was only September, but fairly cold out. *Not really cold,* I thought. *I guess I've just been used to the warm summer weather.* It was only sixty degrees out but that was cold enough.

So, I hopped in my car and rode off to the dorms. My thoughts drifted to Lucy. Lucy and I had become friends lately. Throughout the last few weeks or so of her last ER rotation we had become close friends. I liked that. I was somewhat disappointed that when Lucy returned for the ER sub-I that she was assigned to Doyle. However, maybe that was one of the reasons we became better friends. I don't know. I had admitted to myself that I had a small crush on Lucy. Okay, scratch that. I have *quite a large* crush on Lucy. Nevertheless, I can settle for just friends. I can keep those thoughts under wraps. For now. I enjoy her company immensely and I think of her as a valued friend. Who knows what would happen later, but for now this was the way things were.

As I began to park the car, I saw Lucy waving to me from the sidewalk. She ran over to the car and hopped in.

"Hey!" she said.

"Hey yourself. What are you doing out here?"

"It was nice out. I decided to wait outside after your call," Lucy replied.

"Ahh, I see. So, where to? Not Doc Magoo's, we eat there enough."

"I don't care, any place with breakfast," Lucy joked.

We drove around a bit and finally found a place to eat. I pulled in and they went inside.

We sat down and ordered. As we waited for our food, I asked, "So, what did you do last night?"

"Nothing much. Sat at home, watched TV, enjoyed my night off. I talked to my mom for a bit," Lucy said, taking a sip of her coffee.

"She's down in Springfield, right?" I asked. I looked up and saw a distressed look on her face. "Everything okay?"

"Yep. I'm somewhat worried though. She's having exploratory surgery today on her stomach and liver--not quite sure what the problem was. She had a tough time explaining it to me. She used to drink a lot though, and I think that it has something to do with that. My aunt tried to explain too, but they're clueless in the medical field. I think they were both confused a bit. My uncle knew what was going on but he had gone somewhere. My mom sounded a little worried and that worries me a lot. She's never worried about anything," Lucy said.

"Well, I'm sure she'll be okay. If you want, I have tomorrow off and can drive you down there," I said. I hated to see her sad.

She smiled at me. "Thanks. Maybe. I'm on tomorrow night, so I'll have to see if I can get off."

Breakfast came and we ate. "You were on last night, right?" Lucy asked before taking a bite of her eggs.

"Yep. Didn't get off until midnight."

Lucy had a surprised look on her face. "Oh my gosh, if I would have known that, I wouldn't have suggested we go out this morning."

I chuckled a little bit. "Don't worry about it. Kerry was up and making noise anyway, so I didn't mind much. Anyway, I always enjoy having breakfast with you."

"Why is that?" Lucy asked.

"Because you're my friend and I'd like to keep it that way," I replied, smiling.

"Oh really? Until when?" she said, a playful smile across her lips.

"Until forever. You'll always be my friend, Luce. No matter what," I said. Even if we become 'more-than-friends,' we can still be friends. That didn't hurt anything.

She smiled. "That's sweet. You'll always be my friend too."

"Hey, Luce, what happened to the guy in trauma two? Kenzile?" I asked,

"They sent him up to surgery a while ago. I think he's done and in ICU now. Why?" she asked.

"His wife is here. Just wanted to know what direction to point her in," I replied.

"If you want, I can walk her up there. I wanted to check on a little boy I sent up there earlier. Promised I'd come back up and make sure he's okay," Lucy said. Seeing the look on my face, she added, "Don't worry, it's my break time."

"Well, looks like it'll be the three of us then. I have to run up to drop off this chart," I said. "Meet you at the elevators," I said, walking back to get Mrs. Kenzile.

The elevator ride was uneventful. Okay, that's a lie. We stepped into the elevator in silence. Then Mrs. Kenzile, who was shaken up, said, "He's going to be alright?"

Frankly, I wasn't sure. This guy came in with three GSWs, one came pretty close to his heart. Another in his leg and one in his shoulder. Some guys were trying to steal his car. People these days. Anyway, he was pretty critical when we sent him up. But, it wasn't my case, I had just helped. It was Maggie's trauma. Lucy and I exchanged a nervous glance.

Finally, Lucy said, "I'm sure he'll be fine," in her most comforting voice.

"I hope so," she said, nearing tears. "I just don't know what I'd do without him . . ." She trailed off. Then she lost it. This was the worst part of my job, seeing people cry over hurt loved ones. I hated it.

Lucy hugged the woman and tried to console her. Finally, we reached ICU. We got off the elevator and asked Lucy to take Mrs. Kenzile to her husband while I ran a chart down to another room. I told her that I'd meet up with her. I ran the chart down to the room, found out Mr. Kenzile's room number, and walked down there. I saw Lucy standing outside the room. "He pulled out of surgery well. He should make it," she said, smiling a little bit.

I smiled back. "I'm glad that everything worked out. Come on, we better get back downstairs."

"Hey, I haven't seen you in a while," I said later that day as I sat in the lounge. Lucy walked over to her locker.

"Yeah, I know. Doyle keeps me busy," Lucy said, turning to smile at me. "Arrgh, we're still on four more hours. I think I'll go nuts!" she said with a laugh.

"You okay? You sound a little bit tired," I commented.

"Yeah, fine," she said. She was lying, I could tell.

"Did you ever hear anything about your mom?"

"No, and it's driving me crazy!" she lashed out. "Sorry," she said, taking a deep breath.

"Hey, it's okay. Your mom said she'd call here?"

"Yeah, she or my aunt. I'm starting to get worried. I had almost forgotten until we took Mrs. Kenzile up."

I stood up and walked over to her. "Hey, everything will be okay," I said, giving her a hug.

"Thanks," she said. "You know, you really are a great friend."

"Thanks," I replied.

All of the sudden, Conni rushed in. "Three MVAs coming in, Lucy, you and Doyle are -- oh, sorry! ETA five minutes!" Then she rushed out just as fast as she rushed in.

We laughed. "Well, we might be in for an interesting afternoon of gossip now," Lucy commented.

"Ah, well, Conni's no Chuni. Maybe not. Come on, we better get going."

I looked at the computer screen. Coronary thrombosis. The blocking of a coronary artery of the heart by a thrombus. I knew that. I needed to check symptoms. I scrolled down and found just what I was looking for. Suddenly, I heard Lucy's voice seep into my mind.

"Dr. Doyle, here's Mrs. McGrath's chart. The one you were looking for?" Lucy said, walking up to the computers.

"Thanks, Lucy. I was about to issue a search warrant," Maggie said, turning away from the computer to grab the chart. "Where was it?"

"Mr. McGrath stole it to see if we were giving 'proper care' to Mrs. McGrath."

"Is he a doctor?" I asked.

Lucy chuckled a little bit. "No. Doesn't know a thing about medicine and questions everything."

The telephone suddenly rang. Again. And again. We all looked to Randi. "Oh, ya," she said, grabbing it. "ER. Sure, hold on. Lucy!" she called after her as Lucy turned to leave.

She walked up and grabbed the phone. "Hello? Oh, hi Aunt Lara. I was so worried, I hadn't heard from you . . . yeah, okay. Is everything okay? Well, just tell me -- okay. Hi, Uncle Mel," Lucy said. I could see the annoyance in her eyes. "Mel, can you just tell me -- yeah, go ahead." There was a long pause and suddenly I could see Lucy's annoyed eyes turn to ones of panic. "No, that can't be right. It's not right. No, Mel, that can't be --" Lucy said forcefully. I could see tears welling up in her eyes. "No. They're wrong, just wrong. Why didn't you call me earlier? I deserved to know! Do you think you were protecting me for not telling me?" she yelled into the phone. I could see her bottom lip start to quiver. "I can't believe it, I should have been there," she said, finally breaking down into tears. "I can't . . . no. Yeah. I'll be there soon, I suppose. Yeah, I will, Mel. Yeah," she said, hanging up the phone, tears still streaming down her face. She turned and ran to the ER exit. I hopped up and started to go after her. "No, just leave me alone!" she yelled back at me, running out. Everyone turned to me questioningly. I quickly explained how her mom had been in the hospital and she was expecting a call. It was obviously bad. I then ran out of the ER to find her.

I didn't have to go far. She was curled up in a ball against the wall of the building. I walked over to her silently and she stood up. I opened my arms and she fell into them, sobbing hysterically. We stood there for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, her sobs subsided and she whispered, "I just can't believe that she's . . . dead."

"I'm so sorry, Luce. I'm so sorry."

I turned to look at Lucy. Fast asleep in the seat next to me. Lucy needed to get to Springfield and was in no shape to drive herself. So, I took a few days off and offered to drive her down there. She had managed to take a week off, but I could only get four days. Better than nothing, I suppose. Lucy had told me a little bit about her family at breakfast this morning. She had two aunts, Lara, whom she talked to earlier, and Ashleigh. Lara was married to Mel and had a daughter, Julie. Julie was younger than Lucy. Still in high school. Ashleigh wasn't married to my knowledge. That was her whole family though. If I calculated right, we could be there in about three hours. I hoped that Lucy could sleep that whole time. She was exhausted and needed the sleep. I felt so bad for her. Lucy once told me that, besides me, her mom was her best friend. I just wished that there was something I could do. I hated to see people mourning the loss of a loved one, but I hated it even more when it was personal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I looked over at Lucy. Still asleep. I glanced at my watch. Almost five. We had been driving for about three hours and I was getting close to Springfield. I had only been there a few times when I was little with my grandparents and really didn't know where I was going once I got off the highway. I would have to wake her up eventually. We were meeting her family at the hospital and I didn't know how to get there.

"Luce?" I whispered.

"Hmm?" she said, sitting up abruptly. One of the positives of working in the ER. While you're asleep, any voice will wake you up.

"We're almost there and I don't know where I'm going," I said.

"Oh," she said, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She gave me quick directions to the hospital and we were there in no time. I parked the car and we got out. I saw Lucy hesitate before she began to walk to the door. I walked over to her and put my arm around her shoulder to give her a hug.

"You okay?" I asked, concerned.

She sighed. "Yeah, I'll be fine. Thanks again, Carter. For everything."

"No problem. What are friends for?"

We took the elevator up to ICU. Lucy's family said that they'd be waiting in the waiting room up there. I felt bad for them, waiting three and a half hours up there for us. I'm sure they were bombarded with millions of doctors and the organ donation people. Who knows who else?

We stepped off the elevator and Lucy grabbed my hand. I'm not sure if it was for support, or just to show me where we were going, but either way I grasped her hand back.

I wasn't surprised that Lucy knew her way around so well. She told me that her mom had lung cancer when she was younger and she spent a lot of time here. That's why she became a doctor. Kinda like me and Bobby. It's funny how similar we were without even knowing it.

We finally reached the room. I saw two women sitting on the couch. One who looked a bit younger than Lucy, who I assumed to be Julie. The other one looked too young to be Julie's mom; she only looked in her mid-to-late-thirties. I guessed that that was Ashleigh. "Hey, guys," Lucy said, with a feeble attempt at a smile.

"Lucy!" the younger woman exclaimed. Both of them jumped up to give Lucy a hug. After some hugging, I'm-sorry's, a few tears, and such, the three parted and saw me standing against the wall.

"Guys, this is my friend, John Carter. He drove me up here. Carter, this is my cousin, Julie Brooks, and my aunt, Ashleigh Knight."

Then there were quite a bunch of nice-to-meet-you's, wish-it-was-on-better-terms between all of us.

"Where are Aunt Lara and Uncle Mel?" Lucy asked.

"They went to go get some coffee downstairs," Ashleigh said. "Come with me to find the doctor, I couldn't explain what happened to you if my life depended on it."

Lucy and Ashleigh left the room in search of the doctor. Julie went back to her seat on the couch and motioned for me to sit down too. I took a seat on the couch and Julie asked, "How has she been taking it?"

"At first, not well, but she slept the whole way up here. I think that helped a little bit."

Julie smiled for a second and sighed. "Thanks for bringing her down here. She wasn't in any shape to drive herself."

I smiled back at her. "No problem. She had been worried about it all day. I feel bad for her."

"Yeah . . ."

Suddenly, a man and a woman walked in. I smiled and Julie got up.

"Hi, Mom, Dad. This is John Carter, he drove Lucy down."

I quickly shook their hands and Lara asked, "Lucy's here? Where is she?"

"She went with Ashleigh to go find the doctor," Julie said.

"Oh. Well, I guess we'll just sit down here and wait."

Gosh, I was tired. I had only gotten five hours of sleep last night. "I'm going to go get a cup of coffee. I'll be right back, okay?"

Julie smiled at me. "Do you know where the cafeteria is?"

"Yeah, I think I saw where it was on the way in. Be right back," I said.

I didn't think I did, but I could find it. I decided to stay gone for a little bit to leave Lucy and her family alone. They needed to talk and I'm sure that they didn't want me there. I took the elevator to the second floor, which’s where we had come in. I walked into the small gift shop and bought a newspaper to read while I was in the cafeteria. Then I went to the information desk to ask where the cafeteria was. Down one floor, to the left. To the right was the ER. Didn't want to go there. I spend enough time in one already. As I stepped of the elevator, I saw a pay phone. I remembered that I told Kerry I'd call her when we got in, so I got out some change, put it in and picked up the phone. The telephone reminded me that it was long distance and asked for more money. After putting in more change, it finally connected my call.

"ER," a voice on the other line said.

"Hi, Randi, is Kerry there?" I asked.

"Yeah, how's Lucy?"

"Okay, I think."

"Okay, I'll go get her."

There was a short pause before Kerry came on the line. "Carter?"

"Hey. We got here about half an hour ago. Lucy's up talking with her family and I'm in the cafeteria, out of their hair. Just wanted to let you know we got here okay."

I could hear the smile in Kerry's voice. "Thanks. Is she going to be alright?"

"Yeah, she'll be fine. Listen, I'm running out of time on the pay phone, so talk to you later, okay?"

"Okay, thanks for calling. Bye."

"Bye." I hung up the phone and walked to the cafeteria. I got a cup of coffee and a bag of chips, since I didn't eat lunch. I paid and sat down at a table with my newspaper. I had been sitting there about fifteen minutes when I heard a voice call out, "John Carter?" I looked up to see Anna. Anna Del Amico. Oh, great. Just the person I wanted to see. However, I put on a nice face and stood up to say, "Anna?" Anna gave me a short hug. Then, she smiled and sat down at the chair across from me.

"So, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"I'm here for a peades conference. I was being shown around the ER and now I'm grabbing a bite to eat. What are you doing here?"

I took a sip of my coffee before responding. "A friend of mine's mother passed away and I drove her down here. I'm just leaving her alone with her family for a bit."

Anna looked at me suspiciously. "Her? Is she your girlfriend?"

"Heh, I wish," I said.

"Oh, so you're too chicken to ask her out?"

"Kinda," I said, blushing a bit. "Also, she's a med student. Not mine anymore, but she's still a student."

"Yeah, but she's not *your* student . . ."

I laughed a bit. "Maybe. But now's not the time, her mom just died."

"You have a point."

"So, how about you and love?"

She held up her left hand and I could see a diamond ring on her finger. "I'm engaged. Not to Max though. Things didn't work out."

"I'm sorry."

"Nah, it's okay. Brett is great."

"Well, then, congratulations," I said sincerely. I had only *liked* Anna. I quickly got over her leaving within a month or so. I was head over heels for Lucy. A whole different story.

"Thanks," she said with a smile. "Now who's this friend of yours?"

"Lucy. Lucy Knight. Why?"

"I just can tell that you're in love with her. You get this sparkle in your eyes when you talk about her."

I could feel my cheeks turning pink. "It's obvious?"

"Kinda. But don't worry, it's not way obvious," Anna said. She stood up. "I better get going. Nice seeing you. Good luck with Lucy."

"Thanks," I replied. "Good luck yourself." I waved to her as she walked out of the cafeteria. I looked at my watch and decided I could go up at any time now. It was almost six-thirty. I quickly ate my chips and grabbed my coffee. I left my newspaper on the table for anyone else who wanted to read it. Then, I took the elevator back up to ICU. I found everyone back in the waiting room. "Hi everyone," I said.

"You were gone a long time," Lucy commented.

"I ran into an old work colleague."

Lucy smiled. "Oh. Well, you, Julie, Ashleigh, and I are going to go back to the house and order something in for dinner. Aunt Lara and Uncle Mel are going to go by the funeral home and make some arrangements," she said, her voice dismal.

"Okay, sounds fine to me."

We all walked out to the parking lot. Lucy and I got into my car and the others would follow us. As we drove, I could see that Lucy was still sad. I tried to get her mind off of her mom. "Hey, Luce?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do you call Lara 'Aunt Lara' but only call Ashleigh 'Ashleigh?'" I asked. Yeah, stupid question, but I just asked the first thing that popped into my mind.

"Ashleigh doesn't like to be called 'Aunt Ashleigh.' She says it makes her sound old," Lucy said, smiling a bit.

I continued to ask more useless questions about her family, such as how old Julie was (seventeen) and if Ashleigh was the youngest sister of the three (yep, and Lara was the oldest).

We finally got to Lucy's mom's house. Lucy told me that this was the house that she had grown up in. It was small, but nice and cozy. Lucy quickly gave me the nickel tour and I brought our two bags in. Ashleigh and Julie were right behind us. I was still exhausted, so I went upstairs to take a shower while the others ordered Chinese food. Maybe that would wake me up.

It did. I got dressed and went downstairs, about to walk into the kitchen when I heard Lucy and the others laughing.

"Come on, Lucy. Tell the truth, you think Carter's cute, don't you?" I could hear Julie say.

"You guys! He's my best friend."

"So? You don't think he's cute?" Ashleigh asked.

"You guys have to swear to secrecy," Lucy said. There was a pause. "Okay, he's totally gorgeous."

"Told you," Julie said.

"Do you like him?" Ashleigh asked.

"Guys! He's my best friend and I think that's all he wants to be. It doesn't matter if I like him romantically."

"But do you?" Ashleigh pried.

"Ashleigh -- yes, I do, now not another word about it. Not one word."

Suddenly the door rang. "Chinese. I'll get it," Ashleigh said. Luckily the door was on the *other* side of the kitchen.

"If it makes you feel any better, I think he's cute too," Julie said. I decided that now would be a good time to walk in.

"You think who's cute too?" I asked.

"*No one,*" Lucy said.

"What's all this giggling and shrieking going on down here? I could hear you guys upstairs. Did you all transform back into middle schoolers while I was taking a shower?" I asked.

I saw Lucy's face freeze when she heard me say that I could hear them. "Did you hear what we were saying?" she asked.

"Yep, but I won't tell," I said watching her cheeks turn pink. "Lucy, I'm just kidding with you. I didn't hear. Why, what were you talking about?"

"*Nothing.* Come on, the food's here," she said.

Yeah, I know eavesdropping is bad. I'll tell her eventually. Just not now.

Lucy's old room had two twin beds in it, so that's where we slept. We were laying there that night trying to sleep, when Lucy said, "Carter?"

"Hmm?"

"You never told me who you ran into earlier today."

I turned away from the wall and turned on the small lamp on the table beside me. "Oh. I just saw Anna Del Amico. She left just before you came."

"The same Anna that broke your heart?"

"Yeah. But she's engaged now, and I'm over her."

"Good for you," she said, standing up and coming to sit on my bed. "Now all we have to do is find you a girlfriend," Lucy said, smiling.

"Oh, I can think of the perfect one right now," I said, sitting up.

"Really?"

"Yep. Nice. Smart. Blonde hair, brown eyes. The cutest little nose," I said. I could see Lucy start to blush when she realized that I was describing her.

She leaned in closer to me and I leaned in closer to her. Just as our lips were about to meet, I said, "Maybe -- maybe we shouldn't." Alarms went off in my head. *What were you thinking, you idiot? What are you, nuts?*

She pulled back. "Yeah, maybe you're right." Damn. She agreed with me.

"Lucy, I . . ."

"You know what?" she said, cutting me off. "I think I'll, I'll go sleep in my mom's room tonight," she said, flustered.

"Lucy," I said.

"See you in the morning, sleep well," she said, walking out of the room.

Great. Now she hates me. I only said it because I didn't want to take advantage of her. It had been a long day, she was tired and vulnerable. Now she thinks I don't like her. If only she knew.

~~~~~~~~~~~

The next two days went by in a blur. Lucy and I were never really alone together, so we never talked about what happened that night. Oh well, we could talk at home. The funeral was scheduled for ten AM tomorrow. Then there was a get together at Lucy's mom's house afterwards. I was on bright and early Friday morning and didn't want to leave too late. It was Wednesday night and we had ordered a pizza. Everyone except for Ashleigh had other plans -- Julie had a date and Lara and Mel had tickets to a play. Lucy insisted that they all go. Ashleigh had gone to get us a pizza and Lucy and I were finally alone for a few minutes. We were sitting in the living room on the couch.

"I'd ask you how you were, but I might get slapped," I said.

"That's for sure," Lucy commented. "I've never been asked that so many times before in my life."

We both smiled. "Truthfully, though, how are you?"

"Okay, considering. Truthfully. I can't wait until Monday when I can go back to work."

"I know the feeling. If you want, you can take my place on Friday," I joked.

She laughed. "I most certainly would if we didn't have to meet with a lawyer on Friday."

"Will?"

"Yep. I haven't decided if I'm going to come back Saturday or Sunday. I'm on Monday morning."

"Me too. That's good. I'm off in the afternoon Sunday if you need a ride back."

"You don't have to come all the way back down here to get me!" Lucy exclaimed, looking down.

I just smiled and shrugged. "Luce? Can I ... ask you something?"

"'Bout what?" she said as she turned to look at me.

"About the other night."

Lucy turned away and said, "We don't have to."

"Hmm?"

"We don't have to talk about it ... it was a mistake ..."

"It's just that it wasn't like --"

"Drop it, Carter, we'll talk another time."

I had finally gotten up the courage to tell her how I feel and she turns me away. One more try? "But --"

All of the sudden, Ashleigh walked in with the pizza. While I cursed Ashleigh in my head, Lucy just said, "Later, okay?"

We ate at the table and soon after we had cleaned up, Lucy said, "It's getting late, I think I'll turn in."

Ashleigh and I said goodnight to her and finished clearing the table when she went upstairs. Then, unexpectedly, she asked, "You love her, don't you?" What was this, the question of the week? Am I *that* obvious?

"Pardon?" I asked.

"Lucy. You ... love her don't you?"

"Uh, yeah," I replied.

"Does she know that yet?"

"Um ... no. I've finally gotten up the courage to tell her, but I think it's a bad time. Maybe when we get back to Chicago. She needs me to be her friend now."

"You're a good person for noticing that. You're a good guy, Carter. She's lucky to have a friend like you."

"Thanks," I said.

"Well, I better be going. See you tomorrow."

"Bye."

After she had left, I tried to settle on watching some TV, but I kept thinking about Lucy. In addition, how obvious I must be getting. I would tell her soon. When we both got back to Chicago. Or when and if I came to pick her up Sunday. Finally, I gave up on watching TV and went to bed. It wasn't much better.

It had been a long day.

It was twelve-thirty and there were about seventy-five or so people at Lucy's mom's place. I knew five of them. I kind of stayed back so Lucy wouldn't have to introduce me to people -- she had enough to worry about. I hadn't seen her in a while, but she was here somewhere. I walked into the kitchen to see if I could help any.

"Hey, need any help?" I asked Lara and Ashleigh. "What's wrong?" I asked, seeing the worried look on their faces.

"Lucy's run off somewhere -- I'm pretty sure where -- but we've got our hands full here. Would you mind going?" Lara asked.

"No, of course not," I said. As soon as I was told where to be, I was off.

Walking distance, I had been told. It was nice out, cool, but not too chilly. The trees were already changing colors. I walked around the block and across the street and found the place described. After a little more walking, I had found what I was looking for. She was sitting on a bench near a small pond, mindlessly throwing little pieces of bread out into the pond. Each time she threw one, four or five ducks swam for it.

"It doesn't look like the little one is getting any," I commented, coming up to sit next to her. "That one," I said, pointing to the small duck.

Lucy laughed a little. Had to be a good sign. "Here," she said, ripping her remaining piece of bread in half and giving it to me.

We aimlessly continued feeding the ducks. "Hey, the little one got that one," Lucy said.

"Yeah."

She paused for a minute before continuing. "Am I wanted back there?"

"Not really. They just wanted to make sure you were okay. Figured I wasn't doing anything."

"Yeah," she said. "I don't want to go back, Carter. I can't deal with it."

"So we don't go back."

There was a long pause where no one said anything. I had run out of bread to feed the ducks and looked over at her. She was silently crying. I reached in my coat pocket and pulled out a tissue. She took it and leaned on my shoulder. I put my arm around her while she cried. I didn't try to stop her; she needed to cry, I suppose. I hadn't seen her cry since the day she found out. Finally I heard a "Thanks."

"Hey, it's okay. It's no problem."

"How did you know where I'd be?"

"Your aunt Lara told me that you'd be here."

Lucy smiled. "Yeah. I used to come here all the time with my mom when I was little. I don't know, I thought I'd come here ... as ..."

"A way to say goodbye?"

She looked at me. "Yeah. You're smart, did you know that?"

I just smiled and laughed. "I probably shouldn't have said that, it might go to your head," Lucy joked.

"Hey!"

She stood up. "C'mon. Let's get back before they send a search party for us."

I smiled and began walking with her. Things were getting better.

"It was nice meeting you all," I said to Lucy's family. It was getting late and I had to get going or I'd never be able to work in the morning. The women gave me a hug and Mel shook my hand. Lucy said that she would walk me out.

"Carter?" Ashleigh called out. "Don't forget about that talk we had."

"I won't," I called back, trying not to let Lucy figure out what we were talking about.

As soon as we walked out the door, Lucy asked, "What was that all about?"

"When we get back to Chicago, she wants me to look after you. I told her that you don't need anyone to look after you."

"That is correct," Lucy said. "Although sometimes it would be nice," she said quietly. She looked up at me and our eyes met. We looked at each other for a long time and finally she broke the glance and looked down. "You have the number here so you can call me when you get in, right?"

"Yep. I'll call you to let you know I got there okay. She gave me a hug. I got in the car and drove off.

I got in around eleven and Kerry wasn't home. I called Lucy. She must have been asleep, because it went to the answering machine. I left a message and went down to my room. I was exhausted, but couldn't seem to get to sleep. I kept thinking about Lucy. No wonder I was becoming obvious. She's the only thing I think about.

~~~~~~~~~~

Friday and Saturday were slow days in the ER. I took the time to think. Don't ask about who. Anyway, I came to a conclusion. I decided that I would back off of Lucy for a bit. Stay her friend. She probably didn't want to be in a relationship anyway. So I would give her time and if she wanted she would have to make the first move. It was Saturday night and I was alone in the apartment. Kerry had to work. It was late, so I just ordered a pizza. I then realized that I hadn't called Lucy to see if she wanted me to pick her up tomorrow. So I dialed her mom's number.

"Hello?"

"Ashleigh?"

"Oh, hi Carter. Everything okay?"

"Yep. Is Lucy there?"

There was a pause. "Isn't she with you?"

"What? No ... is she supposed to be?"

"She ... she said you had driven up to drive her home and took a cab to some restaurant to meet you there. She said you guys would drive home from there ... oh, god."

"Ashleigh, calm down. Lucy is a big girl and can take care of herself."

"Yes, but why would she lie to me?"

"I don't know. Do you know what restaurant she said she was going to meet me at?"

"Yeah ... Pronti's, an Italian place."

"Call there and see if she's there anyway. What time was this?"

"Um ... about four hours ago."

"Okay, she could have come home by now. I'm going to go over to her place to see if she's there. I'll call you back, okay?"

"What if she doesn't answer the door?"

"I have a key, she gave it to me in case she looses hers."

"Okay, I'll call the place. Call me back, okay?"

"Okay," I said, hanging up the phone. Where in the world was Lucy? And why would she lie to Ashleigh? I pulled on some decent clothes and grabbed Lucy's extra key from my drawer. I headed over to her place, hoping I'd find her there.

I didn't. I called Ashleigh back and she said that the person at the restaurant never saw her there either. So I left Lucy's and went to the hospital. You never know. I ran into the lounge and found Kerry in there.

"Kerry?"

"Carter? What are you doing here?"

"You haven't seen Lucy around have you?"

"Is she back already?"

"No, she wasn't supposed to come home until tomorrow afternoon, but she's ... ah, disappeared."

"Well, she's on tomorrow afternoon."

"She is?"

"Well, we're shorthanded tomorrow afternoon and I called her up. She said she'd be happy to work and would catch the next train home."

"Lucy has been found."

"Pardon?"

"She told her aunt a different story and had the two of us worried."

Kerry gave me an odd look and chuckled a bit. "Carter, get back home, you're here enough as it is."

"Yes, ma'am." I walked out of the lounge, happy that Lucy had been found. Well, in theory at least.

"You just can't keep away from us, can you Carter?" Jerry called out as I left.

"Nope. Don't want you guys having fun without me," I said, walking out of the doors.

As I drove home, I realized that I had missed my pizza being delivered. I pulled into the first fast food restaurant I saw and ordered a hamburger and fries. Nothing could be as bad as that food in the cafeteria that we eat.

When I got home I called Ashleigh with the news. She was somewhat relieved, and somewhat even more worried over the fact that Lucy lied to her. I told her I'd call her if I saw Lucy. I then plopped on the couch and watched some mindless TV.

That mindless TV must have been boring, because in no time I fell into a deep sleep. I was woken up by a loud knocking at the door. I groaned. "Coming," I yelled. The consistent banging stopped.

"What?" I said as I opened the door. Lucy. "Lucy?" I asked, rubbing my eyes.

Lucy then suddenly grabbed me and pressed her lips on mine. She took me very much by surprise. After our long and passionate kiss, Lucy pulled back and said, "Sorry, I had to do that."

I'm sure I had somewhat of a dazed and confused look on my face, but I motioned for her to come inside. "You ... you had us worried."

It was Lucy's turn to look confused. "You talked to Ashleigh, didn't you?"

"Yeah. I talked to Kerry too," I said, sitting down on the couch.

She sat next to me. "I didn't want to tell Ash that I was coming home on the train to go to work tomorrow. She would want me to call Kerry back and tell her I couldn't and wait for you to pick me up. And I did not want to do that. Sorry for dragging you into it."

"Just don't make a habit of it. Can I ask you a question?"

"Hmm?" she said, turning to look at me.

"That wasn't exactly your normal greeting there ...."

"Yeah, sorry, I had to do that."

"Why?"

"This whole ordeal has put stuff in perspective for me."

"And what does that have to do with kissing me?"

"Now if I die, I can die a happy woman."

I looked at her skeptically and burst out laughing. "Sorry," I said.

She turned pink in the cheeks. "That's okay. And we can talk about it now, talk about it later, never talk about it again, have things be exactly the same between us ...."

"...have things not be the same," I finished for her.

She smiled. "I don't know about you, but I haven't had dinner. And I have had this craving all week for chocolate ice cream."

"You have?"

"Yeah, we had some in Mom's refrigerator, but it was old and didn't look to appetizing. So, I'm going to go get some ice cream. I passed your place and decided to stop and ask if you wanted to come."

"Yeah, and also make sure you die a happy woman."

"Carter! Would you like to join me?"

"Sure. And we can talk about this whole 'us' thing?"

"Yeah. Go get your coat," Lucy said. As I walked down the stairs to my room to get my coat, I turned to look back at her. She smiled at me. That wonderful smile of hers.

"Hey Luce, no matter what, we'll still be friends, right?"

"Until forever, Carter. Now get you coat."

Until forever. I liked the sound of that.

The End