Chapter One

“Well I guess that’s about it,” Chris stated looking around the almost empty apartment now devoid of most of his personal objects with the minor exception of a few things left in his bedroom that he needed to pack up. “Jack thanks for coming by to help me get things ready for the movers.”

“Are you sure I can’t persuade you not to go?” Jack asked in hopes of changing Chris’ mind about leaving Port Charles.

“I don’t think so,” Chris sighed, “you of all people should know that there’s nothing left for me here anymore.”

“Of course there is, you just refuse to see it,” Jack came around to face his brother, “and more importantly I don’t want you to leave.”

“Who would have thought we could finally manage to act like brothers that cared about what happened to each other?” Chris chuckled slightly at the irony of how some things had turned around for the better, his relationship with Jack being one of the only bright spots in his life over the past year.

“I need you here Chris,” Jack said with conviction in his voice, “you’re part of my family.”

“I promised I would come back to see you and Livvie finally tie the knot this upcoming spring. Didn’t you guys set the date for your wedding sometime in April?” Chris did his best to change the subject and reached down to pick up another heavy filled box to place it with the mass of other boxes piled up by the door.

“Yeah we did, but we both wanted you around to celebrate Christmas with us again,” Jack stopped Chris from his task of getting another box. “I was kind of hoping we were going to continue with our new Ramsey family tradition, celebrating the holidays together like a real family does...”

“I don’t even want to think about Christmas,” Chris cut him off quickly and turned away to busy himself once again, “besides I’ll be busy trying to get settled into my new place. I start my new job at Mercy Hospital in Washington DC the first of January and I need to be ready to handle all of my new responsibilities.”

“What about your responsibilities here” Jack asked as he stepped in front of another box so Chris couldn’t pick it up, “or all you going to turn your back on everything that mattered to you?” 

“I don’t know what you could be referring to,” Chris frowned trying to make Jack move out of his way.

“Yes, you do,” Jack countered back to him, “we all said we would try to help Shelly out with Danny after she moved back to Port Charles to help Ian with raising Eve’s son. Or are you just going to give up on helping Shelly and end up running away like Ian did.”

“I can’t help what Ian did,” Chris shrugged his shoulders, “who knew he would take another assignment to work with Doctors Unlimited and head off to parts unknown to leave Danny with Shelly.”

“But you can help what you decide to do with your future Chris,” Jack argued, “and you’re needed as a doctor at GH instead of leaving Port Charles to take on this new job.”

“Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to work there? I mean everywhere I turn I can’t get away from the memories of her and it is slowly driving me crazy.” Chris shook his head, “I’ve got to get out of this town before I end up losing it completely and ruin my medical career.”

“Chris you’re making a big mistake, you need to be where people know and care about you, not moving to a city where you don’t know a soul.”

“Jack I appreciate what you are trying to do, but in all honesty you are about the only one around here who actually does give a damn about me,” Chris gave him a small smile.

“That’s bull and you know it,” Jack huffed, “can’t you at least stay until after the holidays? I know Shelly wants you to come to her gathering next week to decorate Danny’s Christmas tree by bringing a special ornament to honor the memory of Eve.”

“Shelly and I can’t even stand to be in the same room with one another and you really think I want to endure an evening at Eve’s old loft reminiscing about the past. Eve’s memorial service was hard enough for me to tackle and I don’t want to relive how I felt on that day for anything in the world. I’m trying to put the past behind me once and for all. Thanks but no thanks; I’ll be long gone by then.” Chris turned away from Jack, “Only two more days to work at GH and I’m out of here. Speaking of GH, I need to get to work; my shift starts in about thirty minutes.”

“Two more days,” Jack mused out loud, “well maybe I can convince you to stay in Port Charles in that short amount of time.”

“Don’t bet on it,” Chris grinned at his younger brother, “my mind is made up.”

“You are one stubborn son of a…”

“Hey watch it,” Chris teased, “you’re a Ramsey too.”

“Thank goodness I got all of the good looks,” Jack joked back to his brother.

“Keep telling yourself that,” Chris laughed, “but you know I got all the charm along with all the rest.”

“Can I interest you in dinner later?” Jack asked. “I mean if you are determined to skip town you need to at least have one last meal with your brother before you leave.”

“Okay, you’re on,” Chris agreed, “I’ll call you from work so we can figure out where we want to eat and what time to meet each other.”

“See you later,” Jack walked to the door and left the apartment.

Chris noted the silence in his apartment after Jack left and thought to himself that this move was really going to be for the best. Things were never going to be the same around here and with Christmas rapidly approaching he couldn’t deal with the loneliness Port Charles now represented to him. Once again his thoughts turned toward what could have been if only Eve were still in his life. Knowing it was useless to ponder on things that couldn’t ever be changed he shook his head sadly and got ready to go to work.

Shelly reached for another box up in Eve’s old closet, surely she had to have their Christmas decorations hoarded away somewhere amidst all the clutter that had been commonplace for her sister. Shelly mused only Eve would have found some sense of order to this stacking arrangement and she knew if Eve were here she would have emphatically stated that she knew exactly where everything was and why she had put it there in the first place.

The thought of her sister brought a bittersweet smile to Shelly’s face. She missed her sister so badly and her death had changed Shelly’s life dramatically. Who’d of thought that she would be in this situation? Shelly was now raising her sister’s child by herself, hoping she was making the right decisions for Eve’s son since his father couldn’t handle Eve’s death and had departed from his son’s life too, trying to escape the memories of his former life.

“We never knew life to be simple, did we Eve?” Shelly asked out loud talking to her sister as if she were in the room with her. At times it felt as if Shelly could sense Eve’s presence still in the apartment as Shelly spent quiet evenings with Daniel after she returned home from working in the personnel office at GH. Thank goodness Karen Wexler had seen to it that she had gotten a job where she could work close to where Daniel stayed in the hospital’s daycare facilities. Given all the upheavals the child had endured in his short life, at least they were able to let him stay in the loving environment he had grown used to.

Shelly went back to the task at hand before Daniel woke up and she had to be at work, she needed to find those decorations, she was determined that Daniel would have a good Christmas no matter what. That was the reason behind her deciding to invite all of Eve’s friends over to decorate the Christmas tree for Daniel. That way they could all come together and share stories of good times they had shared with Eve and hopefully it would start a tradition in Daniel’s life. He needed to know how special his mother had been by hearing how she had touched other people’s lives and this was one way of ensuring that would happen.

Shelly grabbed another box down to examine its contents and with a sigh she realized she had not found what she was looking for once again. “I wonder what will be in this box?” she muttered to herself almost putting it back up until a picture caught her eye. Shelly picked it up and examined it closely. The picture was of a group of people smiling and Shelly instantly recognized Eve as she stood proudly in the middle of the group. The people were dressed in scrubs and Shelly went on to note Karen was standing right beside Eve, but as for the rest of the people who were in the picture her mind drew a blank. Well maybe Karen would like to see this picture and she could tell her who everyone was just to satisfy Shelly’s curiosity. She almost put it down until she saw Chris standing behind Eve with a smirk on his face. Eve had always talked about what great friends her and Chris had always been and it surprised her at how standoffish he was in regards to Shelly herself. It seemed as if as soon as she came into the room he didn’t stay long, always making some kind of excuse to leave. 

“Why am I worried about what kind of opinion Chris Ramsey has of me anyway? It’s his loss if he doesn’t like me,” Shelly thought to herself wondering why she even bothered with the man as she put the picture down and her hand brushed over a set of drinking glasses. She shook her head thinking Eve was a packrat. Shelly looked over at another picture, this one obviously taken around the same time as the other picture she had found because Eve had about the same hairstyle, only in this picture it was only of Eve and Chris. They looked so happy, all hugged up against one another holding martini glasses out in a toast to whoever had taken the picture for them. They both seemed to be sure of themselves and the world around them. Shelly briefly thought she had never had the chance to witness Chris look that way since she had met him, he certainly had never given her one of those smiles like the one she saw in this particular picture. 
Shelly looked at her watch and knew she had to get going so she decided to carry the box to work with her to see if Karen wanted any of these things Eve had kept. The items in this box would probably mean more to Karen then for her to just keep them put away.

Hearing Daniel call out to her as he awoke, Shelly answered, “I’m coming Danny,” and off she went to start her morning routine with her favorite little guy in the whole world.

Chris walked off the elevator to begin his shift at GH when he immediately ran into Alan, “Chris just the person I was looking for.”

“Oh no, what have I done now?” Chris cracked a smile at the Chief of Staff of GH.

“This isn’t a reprimand,” Alan replied, “merely a request I have for you.”

“A request,” Chris raised his eyebrow in question, “Alan what do you need from me?”

“How about you considering withdrawing your resignation that you gave me last week?” Alan inquired. 

“And here I thought you would be relieved to be getting me off of your hands,” Chris adjusted his tie slightly feeling a nervousness come over him at Alan’s close scrutiny of him. 

“Chris you should know better than that,” Alan gave him a pointed look, “you have been a real asset to our staff and I really hate to lose you.”

“Alan, I don’t know what to say,” Chris hesitated slightly, “I appreciate all you have done for me and my career, but…”

“Just think about it,” Alan clasped Chris’ arm for a moment, “I can trash all that resignation paperwork you gave me and we can start anew. This hospital needs you,” Alan turned on his heel and walked down the corridor not allowing Chris a chance for rebuttal.

Chris rolled his eyes and looked up to the ceiling in exasperation; it was like no one even understood his reasons for leaving. He decided to go into the on call room to get a cup of coffee before making his rounds.

The sounds of laughter greeted him as he saw Karen and Shelly with their backs to the door. They were obviously looking at something very amusing, but he didn’t have time for this, he began to leave without getting any coffee until Karen caught a sight of him out of the corner of her eye.

“Chris, come here, you have got to see this,” Karen called out to him before he headed out the door.

Chris sighed knowing it was useless to act like he hadn’t heard Karen, he paused at the doorway, “Karen, I’m kind of busy at the moment.”

“This will only take a minute,” Karen beckoned him with her finger as Shelly looked up to him before averting her eyes elsewhere.

“I really need to be heading on up to my office,” Shelly said as Chris moved over to where they were standing.

“You have to show Chris what you found,” Karen held up the picture of all of them as newly inducted interns at GH to Chris.

“Oh my goodness,” Chris exclaimed taking the picture from Karen and looking at it, “look at all of us.”

“It just seems like yesterday we were all together, doesn’t it?” Karen asked in a wistful tone.

“I wish it was,” Chris glanced away from them with a far off look in his eyes. He looked back to Karen and Shelly standing there and said, “Thanks for calling me over, it was nice to see a picture of the old gang.” He handed the picture back to Karen then started to go.

“Shelly found this to,” Karen handed Chris the box of things; “We both thought you might like to have this.”

Chris looked confused for a minute as he accepted the box from Karen and began sorting through the items in the box, “Where did you get this stuff?”

“I found it in Eve’s closet,” Shelly answered him; “I was looking for her Christmas decorations and came across this box during my search. I brought it in here to Karen to see if she could tell me who were in all of these pictures and I thought you two might like having these things that Eve had held onto over the years.”

Chris looked at Shelly curiously. “Are you sure you don’t care if we have these things? Maybe Daniel might want them later.”

“I think she would want you to have them,” Shelly paused for a second, “after all it seems like these things should go to you two since you were her two closest friends.”

“Thanks Shelly, we appreciate you thinking of us,” Karen hugged her tightly, “I know I’ll treasure what you brought to us.”

“Me too,” Chris added quietly, “Karen get what you want…”

“I’ll put the box by your locker,” Karen nodded giving Chris an understanding look.

“I’ve got to go on my rounds,” Chris headed out the door before the memories of his best friend overtook him once again.

“He seems so sad,” Shelly noted as she turned to leave too, “I hope I didn’t add to it by bringing those things by to you guys.”

“You didn’t” Karen told her, “Chris just misses Eve terribly and he tries not to let anyone get too close to him since she died. I guess he just doesn’t want to risk feeling something for someone to have them disappear from his life.”

“So that explains why he avoids me?” 

“Maybe,” Karen shrugged her shoulders, “Chris and I have come a long way since we started as interns here at GH. After Eve died, he and I kind of called a truce with one another, deciding that we could try to be friends, but still he holds me at bay.”

“I wish he wouldn’t leave town, Daniel loves him,” Shelly replied thoughtfully, “I mean that seems to be the one person he doesn’t try to hide his affection for.”

“I think it would take a miracle for him to stay,” Karen stated, “and there haven’t been too many of those around here lately.” 

“What did he say?” Livvie asked Jack as he settled on the couch with his fiancée.

“Chris said he was leaving as soon as he finished up working at the hospital tomorrow. I swear he is more stubborn about this matter than he usually is about things,” Jack pulled Livvie close to him to snuggle with her.

“So much like his younger brother,” Livvie teased as Jack attempted to kiss her.

“I resent that comparison,” Jack pulled away from Livvie not giving her a kiss after all.

“Hey now,” Livvie moved into Jack’s lap, “I was just teasing you.”

“I know,” Jack nuzzled her neck playfully as the phone began to ring.

“Who could that be?” Livvie reluctantly raised up to breathlessly answer the phone, “Hello?”

“Livvie, is Jack there?” Chris’ voice came over the telephone lines.

“He’s right here,” Livvie handed the phone to Jack, “its Chris for you.”

“Hey Chris, are we still on for tonight?”

“Well that is what I’m calling for, some things have come up and can we do lunch tomorrow instead?” Chris asked Jack knowing he was in no mood for company tonight.

“Okay, we will get together at lunch,” Jack agreed, “but you are not getting out of going out with me somewhere,”

“I promise, I’ll see you at lunch,” Chris hung up the phone wanting nothing more for this day to end and go home.

A nightmare. These past few months had been nothing short of that for Chris Ramsey as he had tried desperately to piece his life back together to some semblance of normalcy, but who was he kidding, nothing would ever be right in his life again. He’d had endless martinis and moments of no-strings pleasure and even with the perks of finding a beautiful woman in his bed time and time again it still wasn’t enough. It would never be enough, he thought to himself as he made his way over to the bar in his apartment. He loosened his tie a bit before slipping out of his jacket ready to retire to an evening by himself again. Granted he hadn’t been alone in a while as he’d had a beautiful woman at his side until very recently, but in essence, he’d still been alone. The time he’d spent with Doree seemed hollow in comparison to the hole remaining in his heart as he’d imagined what it would’ve been like to live out his fantasies with one of the only women who’d ever truly touched him. 

"Stop torturing yourself Ramsey," Chris warned himself as he set his jacket over the back of a chair and his tie soon followed. He looked back at the vermouth on the bar contemplating the efforts it would take to make that magical martini mix up, and right now as he wallowed in his own self pity, he decided against taking the initiative to get himself drunk to the point of no return yet again. Even in a state of complete intoxication the pain hadn’t been able to evaporate completely as he was still haunted by her, by the love he’d been unable to share with her as his heart ached at the loss of his best friend. With a sigh, Chris reached for the bottle of whiskey on the bar top, not really interested in the whiskey itself, but he was certain it would provide enough of a catalyst to knock him off into a sleep that was long overdue. 

Chris clenched the neck of the bottle swinging it a slight bit as he entered his darkened bedroom ready to retire into an evening of loneliness. He took a long swig from the bottle feeling a groan building up from deep within him as he decided not to bother with the lights. There was no need to see what was waiting for him as he was already certain he could find his way to bed on his own. Finishing off his swig of the whiskey he wiped his mouth before his free hand fumbled a bit with the buttons on his shirt unsuccessfully. 

"To hell with it anyways," he grumbled ready to give up and go to sleep in his clothes yet again when a flash of light flooded through his room blinding him temporarily as his head throbbed, "what the...." he blinked back as the light faded and was replaced by a soft glow radiating over from the center of his bed. 

Chris blinked once, twice, unable to believe what he was witnessing as his eyes shifted over the soft, silken skin before him. Much to his surprise, a gasp fell from his lips as the figure before him sat upright wrapped up in his satin sheets. 

"I’ve been waiting for you," she called out to him with a seductive smile as she watched him drop the bottle of whiskey to the floor, spilling it all over the carpeting as her eyes traveled to the mess, "now that is going to be a disaster to work with on the white carpeting. You really should be more careful." 

"Wh-what are you doing here?" Chris questioned in disbelief as he stepped forward an inch before stopping himself cautiously, "this isn’t happening." 

"Isn’t it?" she raised a curious brow as a playful laugh fell from her lips. 

"Eve, you can’t be real. You can’t be here. You’re dead," Chris blurted out unable to comprehend the fact that his best friend was sitting before him wrapped up in the center of his blankets looking more beautiful than ever. 

"Is that so?" she giggled slightly allowing the blanket to fall around her waist revealing the soft, silken material of her nightgown to him. 

"Eve, it’s just. I’m drunk," Chris blurted out, "I’m too very drunk to think straight and this...this just isn’t happening....." he shook his head in disbelief. 

"You know, I can see this is going to take some more convincing on my part," she slid out from beneath the blankets bringing her feet to the floor once before rising to stand beside the bed, "perhaps I’m going about this all wrong..." 

"You aren’t here. You aren’t real," Chris shook his head wondering why his mind was so determined to haunt him so. 

"Aren’t I?" she questioned with a soft frown seeing his disbelief as she watched him intently, "perhaps it would help if I looked more like this," she shook her head, her dark hair whipping around her features as it’s color shifted, taking on a much lighter shade and her nightgown transformed into a police officer’s uniform and she pulled a pair of handcuffs up from her side holding them up towards him with a smile. 

"What in the....." he blinked back as she dangled the cuffs before him, "how did you.....I mean, how did you get in here when...." he stammered as she shook her head once more returning to the previous version of herself. 

"I have my ways," she confessed taking a step closer to him before reaching out to touch his shoulder, "but as you can see I’m here with you," she whispered as she felt his body trembling beneath her touch, "I’ve always been with you." 

"But Eve...how can you be....how did you......what you just did....." He stammered a bit finding himself at a loss as she caressed his face. 

"It’s magic," she whispered leaning in towards him, "just an illusion to mask the truth from the world, to keep it from those who wouldn’t understand, but you...you understand, don’t you?" 

"Eve, no, no I don’t. Here you are in my apartment when I saw you die. I was at your memorial and....." he stammered. 

"Shh....." she whispered bringing her finger in over his lips to silence him as a smile washed over her features, "Chris, let’s not waste the time we have together." 

"Time?" 

"I had to pull a few strings," Eve confessed, "and believe me it wasn’t easy, but seeing as how you’ve been carrying on lately especially with the blonde...." 

"The blonde...." he shook his head, "but I just thought that you..." 

"Were her?" Eve shook her head again, "no, but I could be if that’s who you really want here with you." 

"No," Chris blurted out almost too quickly as he reached out to her feeling her in his arms, "no, Eve, that’s not what I want. I never wanted her. I never needed her, just you."

"I know," Eve replied seeing the sadness behind his eyes as she leaned in closer to him, "I’ve heard you calling to me and I answered you the best I could. I tried so hard to help you find happiness, to let you find love in your life, but it wasn’t fair to you. I never should’ve pulled those strings I’d pulled there to help you out. I’d thought that she would be someone you might enjoy being with as she had some of those things going for her that you’d always wanted in a woman, so Ed and I worked out a deal...." 

"Ed? Who’s Ed?" 

"Someone upstairs that is a bit impossible at times," Eve frowned slightly, "but when I found out what her real purpose was here, well I couldn’t let it happen like it was." 

"Eve, I don’t understand. How do you know all of this? About her and me? About everything?" he hesitated, "did you see everything?" 

"I saw enough," Eve began uneasily, "I knew enough to realize that you weren’t any happier, that somehow you weren’t any further along since the day I left you and I couldn’t let that happen." 

"Eve, but how can you be here now? How can you be right here with me," his hand pressed over hers, "how can I be talking with you, holding you?" 

"I told you I pulled some strings," Eve whispered, "but I don’t have time to get into details about it. Right now what I’m here for, what we’re both here for is to fulfill our journeys together. We have so much that was left unsaid, left unspoken and I couldn’t let it go like that. I couldn’t leave you without you knowing the truth, without us being able to live out that little piece of destiny that we were meant for." 

"Our destiny?" he questioned as she leaned forward pressing her angel soft lips against his in a tender kiss. Unable to believe what he was feeling, he wrapped his arms around her slender frame feeling a warmth radiate beneath the surface as her kiss set him on fire, yet completely put him at ease for the first time since she’d left him. "But I......" Chris reached out to her feeling her pulling away from him. 

"We only have one chance to get this right," Eve whispered pressing her finger over his lips, "one window of opportunity and then it’s gone...then fate will take a different twist once again....." Eve stepped back as she watched him closely, "you have to believe..." 

"Eve,” he watched her slowly fading from him, "don’t go..." 

"Chris, promise me you won’t give up. You’ll never stop fighting for us...for what is ahead of us together....for our destiny....." 

"Eve," he called out to her once again as she vanished leaving him alone in the darkness with nothing but emptiness in his heart as he thought of her words. What could she have been there for? What was in store for them? What kind of fate lay ahead of him now that she was gone? Maybe the martinis were overwhelming him and he’d drunken himself into a state of sheer insanity. Only time would truly tell, he thought to himself as he stumbled forward collapsing on his bed with one last resounding thud passing out face down.