Karen had successfully managed to avoid Joe at work for the second day in a row. She knew that they had to talk, but she was still too afraid of him and his reaction to her calling off the engagement. Her shift ended an hour before his, so she thought she'd run over to the apartment and get some more of her stuff out of there.
She had just finished zipping up a duffle bag when she heard someone come through the front door.
''Karen?'' Joe called out knowing she had to be there because her car was parked out front.
A look of terror crossed Karen's face as she realized that she was going to have to tell Joe she was leaving him.
''Karen, you're home!'' Joe said running over to her and hugging her, ''I've been such a jerk to you, I'm sorry.''
''I...I thought your shift didn't end for another hour?'' Karen asked not returning the hug.
''I got Matt to cover for me so I could take Neil to see that new Toy Story movie. I'm so glad that you came home, Karen.''
''Joe, I'm...ah...I can't just forgive and forget,'' Karen found the right words.
''But Karen, I didn't mean to...''
''You hit me, Joe!'' Karen exclaimed pointing at the bruise on her cheek, ''Nothing you say or do will change that!''
Karen knew that she had to be careful about what she said to Joe, but she needed to get it out. She needed to say the words.
''I love you Karen, doesn't that count for something? I'm even willing to see Kevin if that's what it takes to keep you,'' Joe said sincerely, not telling her that he had already been to see Kevin and walked out, ''We can get through this Karen.''
Joe went to sit on the edge of the bed and noticed the duffle bag that Karen had just packed. He started to realize that she really was leaving him. His body tensed up with anger and he picked up the bag and threw it across the room. Karen jumped at the loud thud of the bag hitting the wall.
''You're not going anywhere, Karen! We're going to work this out. There is no way in Hell that I'm going to let you leave me!'' Joe yelled clutching her arm tightly.
''Please let me go, Joe, you're hurting me.''
''You can't leave me, Karen, I love you,'' Joe tightened his grip.
Joe had gone from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde in a matter of seconds and the thought of living with this for the rest of her life scared Karen to death. She had to find the courage to tell him that she was no longer in love with him, and that they were over.
''Joe, I...I don't love you. I can't marry a man that I am no longer in love with,'' Karen told him crying both out of fear and pain.
Karen's words hit Joe like a freight train and nearly knocked him over the edge. He began breathing heavily trying to suppress
his anger. He knew that if he didn't get out of there soon, he would end up seriously hurting her. He released his grip on her arm and took off out of the apartment slamming the door behind him.
Karen fell to the floor sobbing so hard that it hurt. When she was finally able to catch her breath, she went tot he other side of the room and picked up the bag she had packed. She still had a lot of stuff to get, but she didn't have the room in her car, and she just wanted to get out of there. She looked down at the engagement ring on her finger and realized that it was really over. She removed the ring and set it on Joe's bureau before running out of the apartment in tears.

''Hey Neil...no, I'm not on my way...I know I promised, but the hospital just paged me and one of my patients really needs me,'' Joe lied as he pulled into the driveway at the lighthouse, ''I knew you'd understand. I'm sorry bud, but maybe we can go this weekend...okay, I'll come by later to say goodnight, I love you,'' Joe hung up as he walked up to the front door.
He hesitated, and thought about turning around, but seeing the terrified look that he put in Karen's eyes forced him to knock.
''Hi Joe, what brings you here?'' Lucy asked confused.
''Is Kevin here?''
''Yeah, come on in. Is everything okay? You don't look so good.''
''I just need to talk to Kevin.''
''Have a seat and I'll go get him,'' Lucy gestured to the couch and went upstairs.
Seconds later he was coming down the stairs. He knew that for Joe to be coming to the house that it was important.
''Joe, what's going on? You look like you've been to Hell and back,'' Kevin commented concerned.
''I need to talk to you,'' Joe responded glancing at Lucy letting her know that he wanted to talk to him alone.
''I have some stuff to do upstairs, so I'll leave you two alone,'' Lucy played along, ''Joe, whatever it is, I hope you work it out,'' She told him gently touching his arm.
''Thanks Lucy,'' Joe replied as she went upstairs.
''From the look on your face, I take it you and Karen didn't work things out,'' Kevin observed.
''She...she left me Kevin! She said she doesn't love me,'' Joe began, his eyes tearing, ''She told me she couldn't marry a man she didn't love.''
''And how did you react to this? You didn't use physical force, did you?'' Kevin asked worried.
''I grabbed her, and I used every ounce of strength in my body to keep from attacking her. I left before I could hurt her,'' Joe admitted as the tears spilled down his cheeks.
''You did the right thing by getting out of there and coming over here to talk to me.''
''I need you're help, Kevin. I need you to help get this...this demon out of me. I hate the man I've become.''
''I will do everything I can, but you need to do your part too. Are you willing to see me once a week?''
''One-hundred percent willing, but can we have the sessions here? I don't want anyone at the hospital to know what's going on and with my mother and Frank there all the time, they'd figure things out.''
''Joe you should probably tell your family. Their support will help you get through this.''
''Kevin, I don't think I can do it.''
''It might take some time, but you will,'' Kevin told him, ''What happened to your eye?'' He asked finally noticing Joe's black eye.
''Scott hit me. He probably would have killed me if Gail didn't stop him.''
''Scott has a tendency to attack to protect his family, especially his daughters.''
''I deserved it. I hate that I'm capable of physically hurting Karen. I love her more than life itself, and yet that didn't stop me from backhanding her. What kind of monster have I become?''
''Joe, you're not a monster, you just need some help dealing with your anger.''
''I have to go see my son,'' Joe said wiping the tears from his eyes as he stood up, ''Thank you for everything, Kevin.''
''Hey, we're family and families help each other. I'll call you about setting a day for our next session,'' Kevin said walking him to the door.

Karen was halfway home when she reached for her cell phone in her purse. She started to dial Sonny's number, but quickly cleared it. As much as she needed him, she knew that she had to fight it. She flashed back to the kiss, and to her returning the kiss. She was no where near ready to jump into another relationship, and if she saw Sonny right now, she wouldn't be able to hold back. She gave in and dialed the number.
''Hello?''
''Sonny, I know that I shouldn't be calling you, but I just left my apartment and Joe came in and...'' Karen tried to explain, but Sonny interrupted.
''Did he hurt you, Karen?''
''No, he just grabbed my arm, but I'm fine. I told him that I didn't love him, and that I wasn't marrying him.''
''Karen I thought I told you not to go over there alone? He could have seriously hurt you.''
''I know, but he was supposed to be at work...'' Karen's voice trailed off.
Through her tear filled eyes she could see a deer in the middle of the road. She swerved to avoid it, but lost control. Her car went off the road and hit a telephone poll. She screamed just before her head hit the steering wheel and she lost consciousness.
''Karen? Are you there? KAREN?'' Sonny yelled into the phone before throwing it down and running out to go find her.

''Whoa Joe, where's the fire?'' Frank asked as Joe collided with him in the hallway.
''I'm sorry, Frank, I didn't see you.''
''Why aren't you with Karen? Did you two have another fight?''
''What? Why would you think that?'' Joe asked hoping he wouldn't have to tell Frank everything.
''I can see it in your face. What happened?''
''Not now Frank, I just want to get out of here.''
''Fine, then I'll buy you a drink at the Recovery Room.''
Joe opened his mouth to protest, but Frank walked over to the elevator before he could say anything. Joe just followed.
''Okay, now tell me what's going on,'' Frank said as they sat at the bar.
Joe looked at him, contemplating whether or not to tell Frank the whole story. As much as he wanted to not tell him, he knew he couldn't keep this from his brother.
''Karen broke off our engagement.''
''She what? I though you guys worked things out?'' Frank asked shocked.
''Aparently not. I can't believe she left me Frank, what am I going to do? I love her so much, but that doesn't even seem to matter.''
''Of course it matters Joe, but there has to be a reason for her leaving you. I know Karen and she wouldn't just break it off with you without a reason.''
''So you're saying that it must have been my fault?'' Joe said defensively.
''I didn't say that it was your fault...''
''I know, I'm sorry I didn't mean that. Karen left me because I...'' Joe stopped feeling his stomach turn as the words stuck in his throat.
As ashamed of his behavior as he was, he had to tell him. He needed to admit it to his brother.
''Karen came home really late the other night and we faught about it. I was so angry with her and then she made a comment about me falling asleep with Courtney and I lost it. I hit her Frank,'' Joe admitted as his eyes filled with tears.

Karen slept peacefully as she dreamt. She was at Sonny's penthouse and they were sitting together on the couch having a drink. Sonny looked into her eyes and took her face in his hand. He leaned in and their lips met. They fell back on the couch and Sonny began unbuttoning her blouse.
Karen's eyes shot open, ending the dream before things went any further. She looked around and realized she was alone in a hospital room and not in Sonny's penthouse. She was relieved that it was just a dream. There was no way she could face the reality of realizing that she was in fact falling in love with Sonny Corinthos.

I don't know how to love him
What to do, how to move him
I've been changed, yes really changed
In these past few days, when I've seen myself
I seem like someone else 

I don't know how to take this
I don't see why he moves me
He's a man, he's just a man
And I've had so many men before
In very many ways, he's just one more 

Should I bring him down?
Should I scream and shout?
Should I speak of love, let my feelings out?
I never thought I'd come to this
What's it all about?

How could she fall in love with the man who encouraged her to strip and use drugs? Granted he has changed a lot since then, but it still happened and it was not going to be easy for her to ignore. Especially with so many people knowing their history. No one would be able to accept that Karen was willing to give Sonny a second chance. It would also not be easy to ignore that he is the head of organized crime in Port Charles. Karen was havign a hard enough time dealing with all that happened with Joe. It made her afraid to fall in love with Sonny. She didn't have the best track record with men. Falling in love just meant getting hurt in the end. Karen wasn't sure she could fight these feelings, and it scared her. 

Don't you think it's rather funny
I should be in this position?
I'm the one, who's always been
So calm, so cool, no lover's fool
Running every show, he scares me so 

I never thought I'd come to this
What's it all about? 

Yet, if he said he loved me
I'd be lost, I'd be frightened
I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope
I'd turn my head, I'd back away
I wouldn't want to know
He scares me so
I want him so
I love him so

'I Don't Know How To Love Him', from Andrew Lloyd Webber's Jesus Christ Superstar

''All you have to do is sign this paper and you're free to go,'' Bobbie said entering Karen's hospital room.
''Finally! I thought I'd never get out of here!'' Karen joked putting down the newspaper she was reading.
''Are you and Joe looking for a new apartment?'' Bobbie asked noticing the newspaper.
''Um, actually I'm looking. Joe and I broke up,'' Karen said signing the release forms.
''I'm so sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do?''
''Thanks, but I'm okay,'' Karen lied, ''I just need to find a place so I can be out of my Mom's before she comes home.''
''I just might be able to help. There's an empty room above Kelly's if you're interested.''
''Really? I'll have to check it out.''
''You can stop by anytime. If I'm not there, just tell Tammy you're there to look at the room. She runs the place when I'm not there. The only rule is no overnight guests.''
''Oh, that could be a problem. I take Serena overnight sometimes so we can spend time together and to give Scott and Eve a break.''
''Well, I guess we could make an exception,'' Bobbie smiled.
''I'll stop by after work tomorrow.''
''Karen, you should take a few days off to rest. You have a concussion,'' Bobbie warned.
''I'll rest today, I need to get back to work. I'm still getting used to being Chief Resident and I don't want to fall behind.''
''I don't agree, but I wont argue with you. Do you have someone to take you home?''
''Eve and Scott should be here any minute.''
''Okay, I'll tell Tammy you'll be stopping by. Please take it easy, Karen.''
''Thanks Bobbie,'' Karen said as Bobbie left.
''So, are you ready to blow this joint?'' Eve joked pushing a wheelchair into the room.
''Do you really have to ask? Where's Scott?'' Karen asked as Eve helped her off the bed.
''I talked him into working and letting me pick you up alone, which wasn't easy. He needs some time to cool off. He was not happy when we got home last night,'' Eve said leading Karen to the wheelchair.
''I can walk, I'm fi...'' Karen stopped as she felt a sharp pain in her side as she started for the door.
''Fine, huh? Sit!'' Eve demanded pointing to the wheelchair.
Karen gave in and let Eve help her.
''Scott's being so unreasonable. I understand that he's worried and all, but Sonny's not the same man he was when we were together. Scott needs to realize that we're going to build a friendship and that he can't do anything about it.''
''Just a friendship? Is that all that's building between you two?'' Eve wondered as they got on the elevator.
''What...how did you...where did you get that idea?'' Karen stammered, shocked at Eve's suspicions.
''Oh come on, Karen, I know you too well. We're best friends and in a few months, we'll be family. I could tell by the way you two were looking at each other.''
''That's ridiculous, Eve. I just broke things off with Joe. I'm not ready for another relationship so soon, and besides, there is way too much history between us. It could never work,'' Karen responded defensively.
''Oh, so you've thought about it?'' Eve questioned as she helped Karen into the car.
Karen just glared at Eve and the conversation ended. The car ride to the apartment was silent. When they got there, Karen took her time going up the steps, with Eve's help. Karen got out her key and went to open the door, but found it unlocked. She looked at Eve questionally and opened the door.
''Mom? Kellie? How do you two know each other?'' 

Joe was nervously pacing the living room at the Scanlon house when Frank came down the stairs.
''Joe, you're going to wear a hole in the floor if you don't stop pacing.''
''I called Mom and asked her to meet us here and she'll be here any minute and I don't think I'm ready to do this, Frank,'' Joe said running his hand through his thick black hair.
Mary opened the front door before Frank could calm Joe down.
''Are you boys ready to go?''
''Um actually...I need to...'' Joe stopped and took a deep breath, ''You're going to want to sit down, there's something I need to tell you.''
''You're scaring me Joe. Is there something wrong with Neil? Is the Leukemia back?'' Mary panicked sitting next to Joe on the couch.
''No Mom, Neil is fine, this is about me. Karen and I aren't...the ah, engagement is off, she left me.''
''Oh Joseph, I warned you about that, that no good little tramp. I just knew she'd pull something like this. You are better off without her, she's nothing but trouble.''
''Mom, I love Karen and I'm going to get her back.''
''She left you Joe, let her go. She must have realized that she doesn't deserve you.''
''You don't understand, she...'' Joe tried explaining before Mary interrupted him.
''Oh I understand. That girl doesn't even care about breaking your heart. She is selfish and...'' Mary started standing up.
''Mom, Karen left me because I hit her!'' Joe blurted out angrily, jumping to his feet.
Mary's face turned pale white and she had to sit back down. She stared at the floor, unable to look at Joe. She closed her eyes and took the cross that was around her neck in her hand and recited a 'Hail Mary' in her head. When the shock of Joe's confession wore off, the anger set in.
''Joseph Parnell Scanlon, how could you hit a woman? What gives you the right to lay a hand on a woman?'' Mary asked.
''She just made me so angry. She made a comment and I...''
''I don't care what she said to you, there is no excuse! Karen might not be on of my favorite people, but no woman deserves to be physically abused!''
''Mom, Joe has realized his problem and he's getting help,'' Frank spoke up.
''That does not erase what he did. I can not believe that after what you went through as a child that you could do something like this,'' Mary shook her head, standing up.
''If you would just let me explain. I know what I did was wrong and I've been seeing Kevin and will continue to see him until I learn how to deal with my anger and I get Karen back,'' Joe said becoming agitated.
''I never thought you were capable of becoming like...'' Mary stopped not wanting to finish her sentence.
''Becoming like who, Mom? Like Dad? Well I guess it's too late! Maybe I should go down to the Recovery Room and throw back a few, then I'll really be just like him!'' Joe yelled.
''Joe, you need to calm down, you're not helping the situation,'' Frank attempted.
''Don't tell me what to do, Frank,'' Joe yelled at him letting the rage take over.
''Don't yell at him! You have no right to get mad at your brother, this is your own fault!'' Mary yelled.
''What, so now you've completely turned on me, Mom? You know what, that's just fine 'cause I don't need you,'' Joe said starting for the door.
Mary grabbed his arm to stop him.
''You are my son, and I love you, but you can not get away with treating people like this because you have a bad day! I'm sorry, but life doesn't work that way, Joe.''
Joe felt the rage building up as his mother spoke. He tried to brush it off, but couldn't. He could feel his fists clench and without thinking, he raised his hand in the air. 

Karen thought about Kellie's question, not wanting the words to come out wrong when she answered.
''When I was a child, all I ever wanted was a normal family like all the other kids at school. I just didn't understand why everyone else got one and I didn't. As I grew up I started to realize that you didn't have to have two parents, siblings and a ton of relatives to have a family. Then, after my mother told me that Scott Baldwin was my father, I suddenly had this like instant family. I got a father, a sister, grandparents. Now I have the opportunity to get to know the aunt I never knew I had, and I want to. I really want to, but I need some time. Everything is happening at once and I feel like I can't breath,'' Karen explained.
''Fair enough, take all the time you need. I got a call this morning and I got the job so I will be moving to Port Charles permanently. I actually have to get going, I have a meeting with Commissioner Scorpio,'' Kellie said hugging Rhonda.
She touched Karen's hand gently before leaving.
''I should head out too before Scott comes over here looking for me. I'll spare you the lecture he's been working on for you,'' Eve told Karen.
''Thanks but I'm sure I'll have to hear it sooner or later!''
''You probably hate me right now for lying to you, don't you?'' Rhonda asked after Eve left.
''I don't hate you, Mom. I'm hurt and I'm angry, but I can deal with it. What's done is done and the only thing we can do is make sure situations like this don't happen again. Twice is more then I can handle.''
''I promise, no more lying. I hated keeping secrets from you, Karen, but I didn't know what to tell you.''
''Can we talk about this later? I'm tired and achy and I just want to go to bed.''
''Wait, first I want to know what you're doing with Sonny Corinthos...''
''Mom, please, not now.''
''Karen do you not remember what that man did to you? He's a dangerous man and he ruins the lives of anyone who's involved with him.''
''We're both different people then we were back then. We've decided to leave what happened in the past, in the past. We're friends now and he's really helped me out with what happened with Joe and our relationship.''
''Helped you? I can not believe this is coming from you, Karen! How can you even think about giving him a second chance? I saw what happened last time he helped you out! You wound up addicted to speed and taking your clothes off! When I found out what had been going on because I was always too drunk to notice, I felt completely helpless. Do you know what it was like for me to see my daughter go through recovery because that Sonny got you hooked on amphetamines and forced you into stripping?''
''Mom, he didn't force me, I chose to do it. I wanted to make all the hurt and the memories go away. I didn't want to feel anything, or have to deal with anything.''
''And he knew that and he took advantage of it! Karen, by becoming friends with him you are putting yourself in danger. Not only because he's a criminal who gets innocent people killed, but because he knows you're hurting right now and he will use that to his advantage again. I could not handle watching you lose everything you've worked so hard for to go through all that again.''
''Mom, I understand that you're worried, and I'm sorry I put you through all that, but I need you to trust me. Sonny's been there for me to lean on and I need him,'' Karen admitted.
''I don't approve, but I'm not going to argue with you. You're a smart woman and I'm very proud of you. I will try my best to trust your decision, but please be careful Karen.''
''I will, I promise,'' Karen said hugging her mother before making her way to her old bedroom to get some sleep.

Electricity, eye to eye
Hey don’t I know you? I can’t speak
Stripped my senses, on the spot
I’ve never been defenseless
I can’t even make sense of this
You speak and I don’t hear a word 

What would happen if we kissed?
Would your tongue slip past my lips?
Would you run away? Would you stay?
Or would I melt into you?
Mouth to mouth, lust to lust
Spontaneously combust

Sonny leaned into Karen and pressed his forehead to hers
“Sonny, I can’t do this,” Karen protested, her lips inches away from his.
“I’m not going to pretend anymore. I love you, Karen, and I’m not going to keep denying it.”
“Please don’t, I have to fight it, Sonny.”
“What are you fighting, Karen? If you’re so against this, why aren’t you pulling away?”
“Are you really going to make me say it?”
“Yes, I am,” Sonny said sitting up and looking at Karen.
“I…” Karen stopped and took a deep breath, “For the past few weeks, you’re all I can think about. When we’re in the same room, I have to use every ounce of strength in my body to keep myself from kissing you. I’m confused, and I’m scared and I’ve fallen completely in love with you Sonny Corinthos,” Karen admitted breathlessly.
Hearing the answer that he had spent sleepless nights waiting for, he pressed his lips to hers. She returned it without thinking, running her hands through his hair, as their tongues met, igniting the spark. 

Room is spinning out of control
You act like you didn’t notice, brushed my hand
Forbidden fruit, ring on my finger
You’re such a moral, moral man
Would you throw it away? —A question:
Will I pretend I’m innocent? 

What would happen if we kissed?
Would your tongue slip passed my lips?
Would you run away? Would you stay?
Or would I melt into you?
Mouth to mouth, lust to lust
Spontaneously combust
What would happen if we kissed?

Karen’s hands made their way to the buttons on Sonny’s shirt, while his hands held her face.
“Wait, are you sure you’re ready to do this?” Sonny asked stopping her.
“It’s just like you said, Sonny, I can’t keep fighting it,” Karen whispered undoing the buttons.
Before they knew it, their clothes were in a pile on the floor and they were making love on the couch. 

I struggle with myself again
Quickly the walls come crumblin’
Don’t know if I can turn away 

What would happen if we kissed?
Would your tongue slip past my lips?
Would you run away? Would you stay?
Or would I melt into you?
Mouth to mouth
If we kissed…

'What Would Happen If We Kissed?' by Meredith Brooks off her album 'Blurring The Edges'