Her first
thoughts were of Pain and Bright Sunlight. “The curtains...” instantly
they were drawn and Louise opened her eyes with some effort. Taking in
a deep breath she swept the air above her and looked up into Emma’s tender
gaze. “Emma? You came.”
Emma wiped
her forehead with a soft warm cloth and leaned close, “Came? ‘belle, I
was here hours ago.”
Her thoughts
drifted back, remembering the two women who had been her support through
the final hours of her labor and Louise smiled, “I remember, I think.”
Lou struggled to sit up and winced at the pain in tender unmentionable
places. She felt Emma’s strong hands lifting her up and breathed a ’thank
you’ for her help. It was then that soft murmurs and the trickle of water
set a flutter in her heart, “Emma?”
Setting
a hand on Louise’s shoulder Emma sat on the edge of the bed. “Loulabelle,
he’s fine. Rachel’s just giving him a bath.”
“He?” Lou’s
heart leapt at the sound of that one beautiful word. “You-” Lou touched
Emma’s arm, her fingers shook like a leaf tossed in the wind, “you said
he?”
Emma nodded,
and helped her sit up, placing pillows behind her head and tucking the
comforter around her.
Louise stared
at Rachel’s back with such an intense longing that Emma’s heart went out
to her. It had been just a year ago that she had felt that longing, her
own daughter was in the next room with the men. She longed to gather Lou
in her arms and wait with her, but she knew that there was only one thing
to settle her worries.
Rachel reached
for the towel on the table beside her. Gently she dabbed at the water,
humming along with her movements. Shifting, she took a soft downy blanket,
one Louise would’ve recognized as Emma’s handiwork if she’d been paying
attention to it. A few quick wraps of cloth and Rachel turned, a tiny bundle
held before her. Louise sat up and tried to catch a glimpse of her son.
Rachel beamed with pride as she whispered into the still afternoon air,
“Oh Louise, he’s the most beautiful baby in the whole world!” Her words
seemed to pass right through the young woman, her only thoughts of the
child in her friend’s arms.
The walk
from one end of the room to the side of her bed seemed to take an eternity.
Her eyes could do little more than stare at that precious little bundle.
Emma moved
back a step and Louise reached out her arms toward Rachel, who smiling,
set the tiny baby into her arms. “Louise, you have-” it probably would
have made her happy to listen to the heartfelt words of praise from both
women, but the instant she tucked the baby into the bend of
her arms,
nothing else mattered.
For Louise,
the moment she touched his warm little body, the world began again.
Quietly,
Louise said a prayer of thanks as she, suffering from curiosity and motherly
anxiety, unwrapped the blanket from around his body. She set the baby against
her legs and she stared intently at his hands, counting again and again;
ten fingers ten toes two eyes one nose.. “It’s all there,“ she breathed.
Sometime
during the loving inventory, Emma and Rachel left, closing the door behind
them. The door could’ve fallen off and Louise wouldn’t have cared, she
found her eyes roaming over his face trying to memorize each precious inch.
Softly shut, his lashes swept his cheeks, shielding his eyes from hers.
Would he have eyes like hers, brown with little bits of gold, or like his
father? Sadly, there would be no way of know... until-
Tiny lips
smacked together, as if somewhere in a dream he found some tasty morsel
to eat. Louise felt her heart dance at the sound, life was a miraculous
thing. Joy took over and she hugged the tiny baby to her, her cheek brushed
against his downy skin and she breathed in his scent.
Today was
the birthday of the sun and the moon... the stars and all the living things
on the earth started over, bright and shining. “It’s almost like it’s my
birthday too.”
A kiss,
soft and tender, she touched her lips to his forehead, his cheeks and his
little nose. Smiling, Louise rubbed her cheek against the downy hair on
his head. She cuddled him close and listened to the his even breathing,
feeling the light gusts of warm breath on her skin. It was heavenly.
Voices outside
her window told her that life continued in another place, but here in her
bedroom she had a world of her own.
Louise smoothed
the blanket back again and watched as the soft light of the approaching
night sweep over his head. She looked up at the empty room, with Emma and
Rachel gone, the room seemed cavernous. Turning back to her newborn son,
Louise suddenly felt that nothing really mattered except for the baby in
her arms
A soft yawn
drew her eyes and Louise felt some new and unnamed feeling wrap itself
around her heart.
“I remember
how to change a diaper and feed a baby with a bottle, but...” eyes, hazel
and brown drifted closed taking her thoughts with their sight. “I don’t
have much in the way of real motherin’ skills, so you’ll have to be patient.”
In sleep, her son looked as if he was pouting, his lower lip set a bit
further out than the top. Gently, she traced the bow of his tiny lips,
“Now, don’t go worryin’ on me.” The soft sound of footsteps outside the
door drew her gaze. A second set, softer, but just as solid joined the
first. “Sounds like your father wants to see you, we’ll call for him in
just a minute.”
Louise froze
as a tiny whine rose up to her ears. Looking down she stopped thinking,
her son’s eyes looked back at her with a strange mixture of innocence and
wisdom in his gaze. “What did I ever do to deserve you?”
The whine
grew to an insistent wail, his arms reaching blindly toward her. Somewhere
deep inside her, her body answered the age old call and Louise unbuttoned
her nightgown and drew him closer to her body. She remembered her own mother
doing the same thing with Teresa as a baby, but this was all so different.
Tiny hands brushed against her skin as the baby rooted himself to her breast.
There was a few seconds of pain before she settled into the sensation.
Louise slipped
down against the bed, careful not to disturb him. Settling against the
mattress she closed her eyes, listening to the sounds of her own heart
beating. She touched her hand to his little chest, gently stroking the
warm skin just under his chin. “Hello my little one.” Just beneath her
hand, the
strong beat of his heart touched her hand and tears came to her eyes. No
ride, no adventure, no other moment the world had ever seen could take
the place of this one.
She heard
the door open and felt the side of the bed bend under the weight of her
husband. “I love you.”
Louise smiled,
“I love you back.”
“He’s beautiful,
like you.”
“He’s just
beautiful.”
“Yes, he
is.”
Sleep claimed
her as she felt an arm wrap around her waist. Gently she stroked the tiny
head nestled against her body. “Life,” she sighed, “doesn’t get better
than this.”
The first
time ever I saw your face
I thought
the sun rose in your eyes
And
the moon and the stars were the gifts you gave
To the
night and the empty skies my love
To the
night and the empty skies
The
first time ever I kissed you
I felt
the earth turn in my hand
Like
the trembling heart of a captive bird
That
was there at my command my love
That
was there at my command
The
first time ever I lay with you
And
felt your heart beat close to mine
I thought
our joy would fill the earth
And
would last 'till the end of time my love
And
would last 'till the end of time
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Raye
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