Two Divided by One

by Arkangel

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission.  No copyright infringement is intended by the author.  The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

 

 

 

 

Note: This was a story originally started by Blue.  (Thanks Blue) I read it in the Workshop after she had posted what she had and was thrilled with the idea of continuing it.  Blue felt she couldn't finish the story and made it a challenge of sorts.

 

 

 

It had been his idea, his plan that brought them here.  That was the recrimination than ran unbroken through Jarrod’s mind.  Underneath the desperate mental search for a solution or option and entwined with the pain he felt on seeing his brother wounded, that thought and that guilt were a constant.  He’d thought he could manipulate and coerce them as easily as a reluctant witness.  He’d interfered, imagining he could force something that could only evolve naturally if at all.

 

He’d been wrong.

 

He’d been so sure of himself when he’d formed his plan in a wash of emotion and arrogance.  Three days earlier it had seemed a solution.  A relief from the barely restrained animosity under the tenuous truce they’d both sworn to.

 

Victoria had forced the promise after a bitter physical altercation.  And they had kept it.  There were no punches and the words they exchanged, at least in the presence of others, weren’t openly hostile.  But the cold undercurrent that ran between them chilled the whole household.

 

Jarrod had feared the truce had been broken the night he hatched his plan.  He’d gone out for air before retiring.  And he’d heard their voices from the barn.  He couldn’t make out the words, but he could tell they were loud and angry, dangerous words.  He moved toward the barn to intercede.  Jarrod watched, unseen in the dark, as Nick stormed off toward the house, slamming the door behind him.  The large door had bounced back open a few inches.  Through the opening, Jarrod saw Heath standing there looking after Nick, his face furious.  But, within a moment, his expression changed.  Every trace of rage and bravado fell away from him and all that was left on his face was a sorrow so complete as to look to Jarrod as grief.  Heath went to a stall, crossed his arms over the gate top and leaned his head down to rest there as if exhausted.

 

Jarrod had told himself he thought of Heath as a brother.  It was only natural that it would take time for any depth of feeling.  No one could expect him to care this soon for Heath as he did for Nick.  He’d realized he might never care as much for Heath, though he tried.  It wasn’t something that could be helped and it was something he could hide, the rest of his life if necessary.  But, he had believed he’d thought of him as a brother.  As he had watched Heath that night though, he realized he’d been wrong.

 

Heath’s transformation from defiance to despair touched Jarrod's heart, touched his very soul.  He felt Heath's pain, and determined, in that instance, that Heath was truly his brother, in both heart and spirit.  He needed to do something, and fast if he was going to save his younger siblings from a fate worst that death.  The loss of a brother.

 

That’s when he decided he had to intervene and bring his brothers together.  He wanted to comfort Heath and tell him it would get better.  But, he knew it was too early on to intrude on Heath’s private moment.  Heath wouldn’t want his comfort; he’d never admit he needed it.  And it couldn’t get better until Nick felt what Jarrod had felt.  He went to find Nick.

 

Jarrod found him in the darkened parlor and stopped in the entranceway, Nick unaware of his approach.  One of Nick’s hands gripped the mantelpiece; the other held a drink and his face was illuminated by the fire’s glow.  There wasn’t any trace of the anger Jarrod had expected to find, no pacing bluster.  Jarrod had been prepared to handle Nick’s anger; he’d had plenty of practice.  The despair on Nick’s face kept Jarrod observing from the shadows for only a moment.  Then once again he left a brother alone to a private pain and began a plan to bring them together.

 

It was to start out as a simple hunting trip.  Jarrod had cleared his calendar for the next two weeks and he, along with his stubborn brothers, were going to go on a hunting trip to hopefully ease some of the animosity of the past few days.

 

Jarrod remembered clearly his brother's reactions.  Nick was more vocal that Heath, but you could see the dislike of the idea in his youngest brother's eyes.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Are you crazy, Jarrod?" Nick stormed, "You actually want me to spend two long weeks away from this ranch traipsing around with......with him!"

 

"Nick, I'll be there too."  Jarrod said calmly.

 

"Won't matter, it's.....I won't do it!"

 

"Neither will I."  Heath said quietly.

 

"Boys, I have a light schedule, the ranch is running smoothly, Duke can handle anything that might happen, I think this would be a perfect time for the three of us to get to know each other."

 

"I know you just fine!" Nick spat.

 

"Nick...."

 

Nick took a deep breath, trying to calm his raging emotions, "Jarrod, I think that, as noble as it sounds, spending any more time with....him....will only make things worse."

 

"I don't think so, and he does have a name.  It's Heath....Heath BARKLEY, remember?" For a brief moment, Jarrod's anger was boiling to the top.

 

"I remember, damn it, why....."  Nick was interrupted.

 

"Jarrod, I'm sorry, but for once, I agree with Nick, this isn't a good idea."  Heath stated in a matter of fact way.

 

"Nick, Heath....Mother happens to think it's a wonderful idea, and she has given it her blessing.....you wouldn't want to disappoint Mother now....would you?" Jarrod knew how to play dirty, he was a lawyer after all.

 

"Jarrod, that's not fair."  Nick mumbled defiantly.

 

"No, it's sure not.  I sure wouldn't want to get Mrs. Barkley's dander up none."  Heath agreed swiping a nervous hand through his hair.

 

"Then it's agreed, we leave first thing in the morning, we'll head up to the north ridge and make our plans from there.  Be sure to pack smart, don't want to have to come back for supplies and the like."  Jarrod smirked, he'd won that battle.  But he was sure his ear's were gonna be burning like a house on fire by Supper time.

 

"Fine!" Nick stomped away mumbling about pushy, no good, underhanded lawyer brothers who don't know how to keep there nose out of others peoples fights......

 

"Fine!" Heath echoed mumbling something in Spanish that he was sure he didn't want translated at the time.

 

"Fine."  Jarrod grinned.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

By morning, Jarrod's arrant brother's moods had not softened.  Quit the contrary.  Nick was fuming.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Let's get this going, we don't have all day!" Nick growled as he stomped none to quietly down the stairs.

 

"Nick, be quiet, Mother and Audra are still sleeping."  Jarrod scolded.

 

"Where is he?  If that lazy, good for nothing...."

 

"What, Nick?" Heath asked as we walked from the kitchen carrying a two large sacks filled to overflowing with food and other supplies.

 

"Where have you been?" Nick asked with an icy glare.

 

"Gettin supplies ready.  Where've you been?" Heath shot back.

 

"Stop fighting, this stops now."  Jarrod intervened.  This trip was going to be enjoyable if it killed them.

 

Nick and Heath gave each other one last growl then went about finishing the task of getting supplies ready for the long trip.

 

Three saddled horses and three pack horses stood waiting in the front as they exited the house.

 

Mounting, they were on there way to, as Nick would put it, hell on earth.

 

The ride to the north ridge was quiet, peaceful, almost.....nice.  But Jarrod knew it wouldn't last.  they had been riding for three hours and, when it came time to take a rest, the fighting would resume.

 

Jarrod felt he was in charge of three year olds instead of two grown, mature men.  They bickered about anything and everything.  Once mounted again, the silence would continued.  The only reason for that was that they were separated, Nick in front of Jarrod and Heath behind, so they couldn't fight as affectively.

 

"We should reach the ridge by sunset.  We'll make camp then."  Nick announced.

 

"Sounds good, brother Nick."  Jarrod's only answer was a growl of contempt.

 

Heath snickered behind Jarrod, and Jarrod grinned.  Heath was enjoying this trip, even though he wouldn't voice it.

 

"Heath, have any thoughts on were we should go from there?" Jarrod asked trying to include the new brother in the plans.

 

"Why ya asking him?  He doesn't know this country like I do.  I say we go down the north face and into the woods.  Deer should be plentiful there."

 

"Nick, Heath, I'm sure, has an idea.  He is a member of this family and his opinion matters just as much as yours."  Jarrod answered.

 

Another growl.

 

Another snicker.

 

"Nick's idea sounds find."  Heath answered.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Reaching the north ridge was achieved by sunset, Nick decided, with little input from his brothers, that they would go on a bit further and camp on the small plateau at the top.  Being more of a small hill than an actual ridge, the gradual incline was easy and, thirty minutes later, they were setting up camp.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"I was kinda expecting a ridge, not a hill."  Heath stated as he unpacked his bed roll.

 

"Well brother Heath, it's really not a ridge, Audra named it that when she was eight or nine.  She thought it sounds a little better than the 'north hill'.  She can be pretty dramatic when she wants to be."  Jarrod grinned at the look of amusement on Heath's face, "It just marked the border between the flats and the 'wild country' as Nick calls it."

 

"I reckon Audra gets her drama from Nick."  Heath grinned hearing a audible curse carry from the other side of the camp.

 

"Yes Heath, I believe you're right.  Nick can be pretty dramatic too, I guess I never thought of where Audra got it from."  Jarrod and Heath shared there first, and hopefully not last, laugh at Nick's expense.

 

"Don't encourage him, Jarrod."

 

"I'm not, Nick.  He's doing fine on his own."  Jarrod threw a few more pieces of wood on the fire, "I don't know about you boys, but I'm hungry and tired, why don't we eat, and hit the sack?"

 

"Sounds good."

 

"Fine."

 

Once the meals were eaten, they scrapped and cleaned the plates and, one by one, climbed tiredly into there bed rolls.

 

"Night Jarrod."  Heath yawned.

 

"Goodnight Heath."  Jarrod turned to Nick, "Goodnight Nick."

 

"Night."  Nick mumbled.

 

Jarrod heard a soft sigh from Heath's direction.  He knew, well, he'd hope this was a good idea.  But so far, the plan wasn't going as he had hoped.

 

When dawn broke early the next morning, Jarrod's sleep was interrupted by angry words and yelling.

 

"I said, get the horses feed and ready, BOY!"

 

"Nick, so help me, if you call me boy again...I'll....."  Heath's red faced rage made it hard for him to continue.

 

"You'll what....BOY?" Nick sneered, "Or would you rather me call you bast...."

 

"You...."  Words were finished, Jarrod saw Heath lunge for his brother and in a full body tackle, knock Nick off his feet.  The angry cry of fury was unsettling coming from this quiet, easy going brother.  The look of shock on Nick's face just before the tackle told Jarrod that Nick had realized that he had gone to far.

 

Jarrod tried, but failed to come between his fighting brothers, Heath was in a rage like he had never seen, and it was all he could do to separate them.  They were coming precariously close to the edge of the 'ridge' and his fear was that they would topple over.

 

Then it happened, the three brothers, gripped in anger and fear, fell as one down the slightly steeper north side of the 'ridge'.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod silently cursed himself as he unbuttoned Heath’s shirt to check his chest.  He’d reacted so quickly that he only now realized the mistake he made.  He and Nick had struggled to their feet after the fall, their eyes searching out each other and Heath.  In hindsight Jarrod recalled the look on Nick’s face as he saw Heath’s blood darkening his shirt.  Nick’s unguarded expression and his first movement toward Heath to help his brother.  But, Jarrod had been closer and reached Heath first.  And Nick’s face had closed again and he’d been still.  Jarrod wanted that second back.  Awful as it was, that moment had been the chance at what he’d hoped for, what had set the whole thing in motion.  It might have been the last chance they had and Jarrod had wasted it by reaching Heath first.

 

Shaking his head to clear it, he would not allow this trip to end with the loss of a brother, rather it be in body or soul.  He was determined to make amends to Nick for not allowing his first instinct to help Heath, and to Heath for.....everything.  For not supporting him, for not encouraging him, for pushing his need for family away to make room for suspicion and mistrust.  For not feeling the love one brother should feel toward another because of the circumstances of his birth.  He needed to make this right, for his sake, but more importantly, for the two young men he's proud to call.....brother.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Heath?" Jarrod said in a shaky voice.  "Nick, he needs a doctor."  Jarrod turned, expecting Nick to be right behind him.  Seeing him a few feet below him, he began to worry.  "Nick, you okay?"

 

"Yeah, just a little banged up.  I think I twisted my knee pretty good coming down.  Sure does hurt.  Figure I'd better stay here and not move to much."  Nick paused, "How is.......he.....Heath?"

 

"I'm not sure, there's a lot of blood, looks like he may have caught a root or a sharp rock on the way down.  Cut a pretty good gash in his chest."  Gently turning Heath's face, Jarrod continued, "He must have hit his head too, he's got a good sized knot and I would assume possibly a cracked rib or two."

 

"We need to.....we need to get back up this hill.  I don't think I can make it on my own......I'm pretty sure I won't be much help getting him up there."  Nick stopped, "Are you hurt?"

 

"No, just bumped and bruised, nothing serious.  I'll be sore in the morning.  I'll go up to camp and get a rope, maybe, with the help of the horses, I can pull you both up.  may take a while though.  Will you be all right?"

 

"Go, I'll be fine."

 

Jarrod turned to his still unconscious brother, "Heath, I'm going up the hill to try and get you and ol' Nick out of here.  I won't be gone long, you hear."  Jarrod was concerned, Heath had yet to regain consciousness.  "Nick, can you move up here and sit with Heath while I'm gone.  If he wakes up, he may be disoriented.  I don't want him to cause himself anymore damage."

 

"Jarrod........yeah, you'll have ta help me."

 

Jarrod scooted down to were Nick was and, slowly helped him the ten or so feet to their younger brother's side.  "Just sit tight, I'll be back as soon as I can."

 

"Sure."

 

The crawl to the top was painstakingly slow.  Jarrod had forgotten how much steeper the north face was as apposed to the south.  Not so steep a horse couldn't make the trek, but you'd have to be real careful.  "Sure was easier going down that it is going up."  Jarrod mused.  "Must be getting old."

 

Taking a breather, Jarrod turned check on his two brothers.  Heath still out and Nick.....well, he looked like he was just sitting and staring at Heath.  No emotion, no worry......nothing.  "Please God, help me to help them."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Nick watched Heath.  A swirl of emotions in his head fighting to get out.  He was upset his......dare he think it.....brother was lying here, motionless, but his mind wouldn't let him feel it.  He knew he should feel something, but nothing came.  In the short time this stranger has been at the ranch, they have been having nothing but conflict.  Fight after fight would erupt into a family discussion with sides being taken and feeling being hurt.  Mother urging him to open his heart to this new brother, Audra begging him to 'not be so mean', Jarrod being the moderator and, more times that not, taking his side in the matter once the discussion was over and others had gone to bed.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"N...Nick?" Nick turned to the soft voice.

 

"Yeah, I'm here."

 

"N....Nick!"

 

"What!"

 

Half lidded blue eyes peered, unsure up at him.  "Y-you.....you al....right?"

 

"Fine."

 

"Jar...rod?"

 

"He's fine, gone up the hill to get us some rope.  Won't be long."

 

"Hurt?"

 

"Who?"

 

"You.....hurt......head's.....bleedin."

 

Nick felt his temple and winced, he didn't even realize he'd cut it, "Just a scrape."

 

"Tired.....gonna .....sleep."

 

Nick knew that he shouldn't let Heath go back to sleep, "Hey!  You need to stay awake."

 

"Can't...."

 

"Well you gonna have to."

 

"My.....chest hurts......Shot?"

 

"Na."

 

"Stabbed?"

 

"Nope."

 

"Push.....me.....down...the...mountain?"

 

Nick took a double take, "I did not push you down........of all the nerve......if it was anyone's fault, it's yours.  If you'd just done....."

 

"My.....fault.....sorry."

 

"Wha?"

 

"Shouldn't have......gotten......mad.....been called.....worse."

 

Nick struggled with his inner demons, which in turn were pushing his compassion to the far reaches of his heart.  "I'm sure you have."  Nick cringed at his own words.

 

Heath was silent after that and Nick was all to happy for the quiet.  Checking every little bit to make sure he didn't slip into unconsciousness, Nick waited for the voice he hoped to hear soon.  That of Jarrod saying he had made it and was throwing the rope down.

 

"Hurry Jarrod......Hurry."

 

Jarrod was almost there.  The last few feet waiting patiently to be mastered and the climb finished and done.  Four feet, three feet, two feet.....one foot.  Rolling over the edge to the safety of the plateau, Jarrod tried to catch his breath.  Every bone and muscle in his body ached with fatigue, his heart ached with pain and his soul begged to be lightened of it's burden.

 

Peering over the edge at the two figures below, he spurred his body up and forward toward the camp and the means to bring his brothers safely to the top.  One rope, two blankets, water.....the mental list ran over and over in his over tired brain.  Grabbing all he needed and a clean shirt as an afterthought, he walked gingerly to the edge.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Nick.....Heath......I have the rope?  I'm tying it off on Coco," Jarrod went about doing just that, "Okay, I'm gonna lower the rope, I have a blanket tied to the end with a canteen and another blanket inside.  Let me know when you get it!"

 

A few agonizing minutes later, Nicks voice was heard, "I've got it......what do you want me to do?"

 

"Good, make a couple of holes in the corners of the blanket, and loop the rope through."

 

"Okay, I know were you going with this."  Nick did as Jarrod asked, remembering the teachings of there father so many years ago.  "Done."

 

"Nick, do you think you can roll Heath onto the blanket?"

 

"I....."  Nick looked down at the pale face and closed expression, receiving a slight nod, he answered, "Yeah, I think I can."

 

"Do it, but be careful.  Let me know when you're done."  Normally, Jarrod had the patience of a saint, but this wasn't normal, every minute spent on the side of this hill could be the difference between life and death.

 

Nick mentally counted to three, then as gently as he could, allowing for his own disability, he rolled Heath over, then over again until he was squarely on the blanket.  "Sorry."  He said quietly noting the pain etched on Heath's face.

 

"Okay Jarrod, we're done, give us a minute, he's in quit a bit of pain."

 

"That's fine, see if he'll take some water.  You might want to pour some on the wound and cover it with the shirt I sent down."

 

"I was wondering why you sent that."  Nick said to himself, "Okay boy, see if you can stand a little water, then I'm gonna clean this wound a little."

 

Heath nodded, and, with Nick's help, raised his head to take a sip of cool water.  "More."  He crocked.

 

"No, don't want ya getting sick on the way up.  I'm gonna open up your shirt and pour some water on it, it's gonna be cold so get ready."  Nick took a drink first, then poured a good amount over the now visible wound.  "Looks deep."  Nick thought, "Bet it hurts like hell."  As more of the angry gash became clear and more blood was washed a way, the full extent of the injury slapped Nick in the face, "Blessed God in Heaven!" Nick, who wasn't a squeamish man by no means, had to stop.  This was no mer scrape, this was a long, jagged tare from just below his left collar bone extending diagonally across his chest and ending below his right rib cage with a deep puncture.

 

"Nick?  Nick what's wrong?" The worry and slight panic in Jarrod's voice pulled Nick out of his shock and proceeded to finish his task.

 

"Nothing Jarrod, Just......just cleaning the wound."  Nick covered the gash the best he could, "We're ready."  Nick took the other blanket and tossed it over Heath, tied the ends of the first blanket up and around his feet forming a cocoon, then held onto the rope just above Heath.  "Hold on, this is gonna be one hell of a ride."

 

Silence was his answer.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod urged Coco forward slowly, he knew the ride up would not be a comfortable one for Nick or Heath, but it was the only way he knew to get them to the top.  Hoping against hope, he wondered how he was going to ease the guilt engulfing him for getting them all in this predicament.  If he hadn't have suggested, no that was wrong, insisted they make this little trip, none of this would have happened.  Fighting against the sadness that threatened to over take him, he pushed it aside and continued the arduous task of pulling his brothers up.

 

Nick held on, he had to, the only alternative was to let go and fall.  That was not an option.  The ride up was murder on his leg, and the headache that was just in the foreground had made itself known.  The blinding pain was enough to cause him to rethink this method of getting out of there.  If he was hurting this bad, he could only imagine what Heath was going through.  But yet, there was no sound from the cocoon of blankets trailing behind him.  Not one sound.  He turned fearing that Heath had slipped back into unconsciousness, seeing that his companion was still awake, he went about trying to think of anything except the blond cowboy.  He was not going to get trapped by misguided feelings, he knew that what was more than likely happening was his usual worry when one of his hands were injured.  It had nothing to do with his heart, or his so called brother.  He was just being a Barkley.

 

That's what he kept telling himself.

 

His heart had other plans, he felt he was as much to blame for this whole ordeal as Heath, maybe more.  After all, it was he who had said the words that drove Heath to react in rage, causing them to come to be in this mess.  If he'd only thought before he spoke, none of this would have happened.  None of it.  He didn't mean what he said, the hurtful words that he had thrown at Heath were a reaction to the moment, to the situation, it was not what he truly felt.  Nick absently wondered why this stranger only a few weeks ago, could bring to the surface such raw emotion and anger.  Never has he slung words at another human being with the soul intention to inflict pain.  He tried to put himself in Heath's position, wanting, needing a family so much that he would endure verbal abuse and name calling to achieve the one thing he didn't have.  A family.  How would he feel if Jarrod, or Audra had called him the very thing that slipped from his uncensored lips in a fit of rage.  He knew how he would feel, it would hurt.

 

Nick was ashamed, even though he didn't want this so called brother to be a part of there lives, he shouldn't have said what he did.  He should apologize for his actions, perhaps when Heath was a little stronger, a little more himself, he would do just that, just not this minute.  It would mean nothing to either of them.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"N....ck, need.....to......stop....."  Heath's broken words where a whisper, but Nick heard them clearly.

 

"We're almost....to the....top.....won't be long."

 

"Just.....a.....minute......please?"

 

Turning and seeing clearly the pain etched on Heath's face, he decided a moment of rest might be good.  "Jarrod.....hold up...a minute."

 

Jarrod's head peered over the side, worry clearly marring his features.  "What's wrong?  Is Heath alright?"

 

"He's fine.......we just need a breather."

 

"Okay, It won't be much longer."

 

Jarrod waited until he heard the okay from Nick to continue.

 

"When your ready....I'll let him know."  Nick said not turning around.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Heath took a few semi-deep breaths to gain control over his pain.  He'd been in worse pain, but the feeling of the rocks grinding against his back was starting to wear on him.  He felt oddly detached as he stared up at the noon sky.  The sun was bright, not overly hot, but the chill from the morning stayed with him.  He shivered violently, not making an effort to hide it.  He knew that Nick wouldn't notice.  Nick hated him, this he was sure of.  The family he had longed for was pitted against each other because of him.  Nick was the one he had wanted the most acceptance from, he admired the man and longed to be his partner and brother.  He had figured out in the first two weeks that this was not to be.  Nick's dislike of him rolled off in waves whenever Heath was around causing the ranch hands to follow in kind.  Heath's will to fight for the family he so craved was starting to fade, he knew his Mamma would be disappointed, but he also knew that she would not wish him to keep his promise to her if it was causing him pain.  The promise made only weeks ago ran through his mind like a run away locomotive.  'I promise I'll find them, Mamma, I promise I won't be alone.'

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"I tried Mamma.......I tried."  The broken comment was quiet.

 

Nick tried to ignore the heartbreak behind the declaration, but found it hard to.  He carefully schooled his features and turned, "What you mumbling about....boy?  You ready to go?"

 

"Yeah."  Heath answered, but added silently to himself, "I'm ready to go home."

 

Nick's heart cracked a little at the resigned answer, "Jarrod, let's go."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod heard Nick and fear creped into his soul, Nick sounded scared.  Nick was one of the strongest men he knew, with the exception of his own father, and he was sure there was a bit of fear in his voice as he spoke.  He forcefully pushed back the urge to go faster, he knew that any faster would cause untold pain on his brothers.  Just fifteen more feet and they'll be safe.  He mentally kept that running through his mind as he took Coco's reins and coaxed him forward.  Fifteen more feet.

 

Finally, after what seemed like hours, Jarrod spied a gloved creeping past the edge, then another.  It was done, the journey to the top finished, but the question as to what to do echoed in his pained thoughts.  He was the only one physically able to ride for any distance, and even that would be difficult with the fatigue his body still felt from his trek up the hill.  Jarrod stopped Coco, and, Coco being the well trained horse he was, kept the rope taught so that Jarrod could assist first Nick then Heath over onto the safety of the plateau.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Nick felt the edge and let out a sigh, "We're here.  Heath, we made it........"  sparing a glance over his shoulder, he noticed that Heath's eyes were closed.  "Heath?"

 

"Nick, let me help you up, then we'll get Heath.....how's he doing?"

 

"I don't know, he won't answer me."  Nick answered as strong arms pulled him up and over.

 

Together, Nick and Jarrod hoisted the bundle of blanket covered cowboy over the top and away from the edge.  Jarrod gingerly removed the blanket covering Heath, the once clean shirt was saturated with bright red blood.  The injury, a jagged reminder of the mornings events, was frighteningly ugly.  Jarrod took the canteen nestled by Heath's leg and open it, pouring what was left of the water over the wound in an effort to keep it clean.

 

"Jarrod, we need something stronger to sterilize the wound, I have......"  Stopping, Nick narrowed his eyes, "Don't you tell mother..."  Seeing Jarrod's nod he continued, "I have a bottle of whiskey in my saddle bag."

 

"Nick, I'm not sure about using that, he's got a pretty deep puncture wound in his stomach, I'd hate to cause more damage."  Jarrod protested, "I can't hurt him anymore."

 

The double meaning wasn't lost on Nick.  "Jarrod, this is not you're fault...."  Nick sighed, "It just happened.

 

"It wouldn't have if I....."

 

"Stop......."

 

Jarrod and Nick both looked to the prone figure on the blanket, "Not...your....fault......"  Heath took a shaky breath, "N'ck......do.....it."

 

"Do what?" Nick realized what Heath was saying and flatly refused, "Oh no, I'm not gonna be responsible for.......for......."  For what, Nick thought, "Maybe Jarrod's right, I......we......oh hell."

 

"Scared?" Heath whispered.

 

"No!  I.......I just don't......I can't......it'll hurt........you do that on purpose, don't you boy?" Nick's flustered reply caused a small, crooked smile in answer.

 

"N'ck.....call...me...boy...again...and I'll wallop ya."  Heath threatened.

 

"You'll try."  Nick retorted.

 

"Stop it, both of you."  Jarrod intervened throwing an aggravated glance at Nick, "Heath, that wounds pretty deep, if we pour whiskey on it, well, I just don't know if I can take you in that much pain.  There's got to be another way."

 

"Can't.....hurt....anymore."  another shaky breath.

 

"Jarrod, get the whiskey."

 

"But Nick...."

 

"Get it, Jarrod.  He's right, it probably hurts like the blazes now, the worse that'll happen is.....he'll probably pass out."  Nick was not as confident or as noble as he let on.  Heath was right, inside he was scared.  As to why, he wasn't sure, all he knew was that the wound needed cleaning and he was the only one willing to do it.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod walked to Coco's saddle bags, opened the first one he came to and found nothing, checking the other one, he found what he was looking for.  Slowly carrying the bottle back, his mind raced at what was about to happen, the pain, the screams he was sure would follow, the silence once the deed was done, and the quiet torment Nick would undoubtedly feel for causing Heath so much pain.  Even though Nick hid it well, Jarrod could tell Nick was waging a inner war with himself.  One half wanting to break free and feel something for Heath, the other wanting to hate the very ground he lay on.  He, himself, had waged this same war not days ago, and Jarrod could only hope the same side wins, for Nick and Heath's sake.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod handed the bottle to Nick and waited for further instructions, "Jarrod, ya might want to grab the other canteen and something to use as bandages."  Looking back down at Heath, he continued, "Are you sure about this?"

 

"Reckon.....so."

 

"Okay, well.....on the count of three.......one," Nick uncorked the bottle, "two," Nick took a deep, painful breath, "three," Two pairs of eyes locked one set in worry and one in resignation, a small nod and the deed was done.

 

The screams, though not loud, were painful none the less.  Jarrod quickly came over with the items asked for and knelt by Heath's head.  "Heath!  Please, just breath through it, that's right, you're tough, you're a Barkley.........come on....stay with us......"

 

"Oh....God....hurts...."  Tears of pain trailed from the corners of his eyes.

 

"I know, I know....."  Jarrod grabbed one of Heath's flailing hands and held tight, "You feel that?  Do ya?  That's me, I'm here and I'm gonna help you through this.  You just squeeze as hard as you want, I'll never let go!"

 

Heath held on for dear life, the hand so firmly holding his providing strength and comfort.  The searing pain seemed to ease as his vision started to grey, his grip loosening though the other held firm.  He vaguely heard a voice calling to him to hold on, telling him that it was almost over.  "Jar...rod, thank....y-y...."

 

"Heath!"

 

"He's....he's passed out.  It's for....the best.  Now we can......now we can finish taking care.....of the wound."  Nick's hands held a slight tremor as he re corked the bottle and tossed it to the side.

 

Jarrod nodded and began to carefully re-bandage the wound.  "I need to move him closer to camp, then I'll come help you, we need to take a look at that leg, we've ignored it long enough."

 

"I couldn't ignore it if I tried."  Nick mumbled, "We'll need to get a fire going before dusk, probably be cool tonight."

 

Jarrod positioned Heath as close to the fire pit as safely possible, then came back for Nick, "Here, lean on me and I'll help you to your bed roll."

 

Nick's gasps of pain were a testament to just how much pain he was in and how well he had hid it until now.  Jarrod watch as all color drained from the tan face, his fear, that Nick would pass out himself before getting him settled.  "Don't you go out on me too.  Come on Nick, we're almost there......that's it.......lean on me...."  Reaching the camp, he gently laid Nick on the bedroll he had prepared next to Heath.  "Okay, let's have a look."

 

Jarrod removed Nick's boots and pushed the pants leg up, "Nick, I'm going to have to cut it, your knees swollen, so the pants leg won't go up any further."

 

"Okay....but you're....buying me a...new pair."  Nick answered.

 

"Deal little brother."  Jarrod took Nick's knife and slit the material to just above the knee.  "Looks pretty bad, are you sure you just twisted it?"

 

"Yeah, don't think anything's broken.  Don't think I coulda made it up that hill with a busted leg."

 

"Right, okay, let me clean these scrapes and take care of that hard head of yours."  Jarrod went about cleaning the wounds and covering them as best he could.  "There, all done.  How do you feel?"

 

"Better now that I'm not moving."  Nick paused, "You do know that you'll have to go and get a wagon don't you?  There's no way Heath can ride a horse.  I'm not sure I could either."

 

"Yes Nick, I thought of that.  There's still a few hours of daylight left, if I'm lucky, and I ride hard, I should be able to make it before midnight."

 

"If you take 'breakneck pass' you'll knock off a good three or four hours travel time.  We rode the long way here and took our own sweet time doing it, remember?"

 

"Breakneck pass', Audra and her names, I still haven't figured out how she got that name from a little windy trail through a few berry bushes."  Jarrod mused.

 

"Because she's a bit dramatic."  Nick grinned remembering the conversation from yesterday.

 

"That she is, okay, I'll take 'breakneck pass' to get home, but there's no way we'll get a wagon through there, I'll have to come back the way we came.  I'll send one of the hands into town to get the doctor."  Jarrod got busy putting everything he thought Nick and Heath would need within reach.  He collected a large amount of wood and started a fire in the hopes to keep his brothers warm.  "I'll leave all but one of the canteens, you'll need them more than me."

 

"Need to water the horses, been here all day without it."

 

"Already done."  Jarrod frowned, "Are you sure you'll be okay?"

 

"We'll be fine."  Nick assured him glancing at Heath's unconscious form..

 

Jarrod knelt down next to Heath, "Heath, I'm gonna go to the ranch, this time tomorrow, you'll be home in your own bed."

 

A soft moan was his reply.

 

"That's okay, Heath, you rest.  Brother Nick will be here to take care of you."  Jarrod gently patted his shoulder and stood, "I'll be back as soon as I can."

 

"I know, be careful."

 

"I will."

 

* * * * * * *

 

Jarrod mounted Jingo, throwing one last look over his shoulder, he gently kicked his horse toward the south side and down the hill.  'breakneck pass' as Audra called it, was a good four or five miles away, close to an hour though the pass, then from there, another four plus hours to the ranch itself.  Nick was right, they had taken the long way to the 'ridge', his idea mainly, because he wanted to show Heath the true beauty of the land his family owns, which Heath now owned.  He wanted Heath to be proud of his heritage, of his inheritance, of his place in the family dynasty.  He wanted Nick to see what he had seen, a kind, gentle young man that would be an asset to any family.  Yes, he knew that it had taken time for him to acknowledge that fact, but once his eyes were opened, he knew that if he didn't do something, he, they as a family, would loose a brother, a friend, a courageous protector, a comforting shoulder, a quick wit, a partner, and to Mother....a son.  He couldn't take that chance.  He was not going to push away the gift clearly given by the one man they all admired.  Tom Barkley.

 

Jarrod pushed Jingo into a gallop, careful not to overtire his faithful horse, he rode as hard as he dared.  It would do him no good if he took a tumble.  His thoughts kept racing back to his brothers, stranded in the camp on the hill.  Would they be okay, would he be in time, could they forgive him his interference.  Nick so wanted to help Heath in his first reaction to the ordeal, but he, like a wall, divided the two and prevented the union of brotherly love from taking place.  He regretted that more than anything.  Such a fleeting moment was lost to him, never to return and they would all suffer for it.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"The pass is coming up boy," Jarrod spoke gently to Jingo, "we're making good time.  I promise to give you a good rest once we get to the ranch.  Extra oats, doesn't that sound good?  I bet Audra will even have some sugar for you."  Jarrod kept up the mindless chatter knowing that Jingo wouldn't mind, he had to keep his mind occupied, had to stay focused and not let his mind wonder.  Jingo was an excellent listener, never interrupted.  Faithful.

 

Turning onto the small trail leading through the berry bushes, he continued, "So, what do you think of this new brother of mine?"

 

Jingo gave a snort, "Yeah, he is quit, but very intelligent.  He's a lot like Nick in that aspect."  another snort, "Not the quiet part."  Jarrod laughed.

 

If Nick could see him now, caring on a conversation with a horse, he would surely think him crazy, but he didn't care.  He'd seen Nick do the same thing when he thought no one was around.

 

Slowing Jingo to a trot, he navigated the trail, "Overgrown a little sense the last time I was here.  When was that?  Oh I remember, Audra was twelve, I think, that's when she named it 'Breakneck Pass'.  Nick laughed at her, he thought it was ridiculous to name a bunch of berry bushes and small trees a pass, but Audra held firm, she's named just about every part of this ranch, except for Nick's 'wild country.' " Jarrod saddened a little, "the last place she named was 'Sorrows Meadow'.  That's were we buried Father."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod quieted after that, the memories of his father rushing to the foreground.  He so wished his father had known about Heath.  He would have been so proud.  Tom Barkley cherished his family, and he knew that he would have cherished Heath.  Another son to carry on the Barkley name, Barkley pride.  He absently wondered what it would have been like if Heath had come to them as a child.  If he would have grown up in the same household as them.  He'd suspected Heath's childhood was not an easy one, though he'd never asked, he knew his past was peppered with tragedy.  One look into his eyes in an unguarded moment would tell you that.

 

If only Nick would just see past his feelings.  One look into Heath's expressive eyes would say what an encyclopedia of words could not.  Jarrod remembered his fathers eyes holding the same expressiveness.  They each held something of there father, Jarrod, his sense of fairness and duty, Nick his gallantry and bravery, Audra, his soft heart and caring for others less fortunate, and now Heath, his passion.  Together, they would be a force to be reckoned with, and the stitch holding them all together would be the fierceness of a mothers love.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"How long we been riding, boy?" Jarrod looked up at the sky, growing dusky as the sun slowly made it's way lower, "been close to four hours.  Boy I didn't think we'd ever make it through that pass.  You did good.  We should be home in about an hour."  Jarrod pushed Jingo a little harder, "Sorry ol' pal, we've got two very special young men waiting for us, we need to hurry."  As if Jingo could hear the fear in his master's voice, he put on a burst of speed to carry his rider closer to home.

 

Minutes pasted like hours, Jarrod knew it would only be a matter of time before he would crest the hill and see the gates marking the entrance to the family home, but his patience was wearing thin.  He was tired, and hungry, but there would be no rest, no food till his errand of mercy was complete.  "There it is boy, not long now."  Jarrod yelled as the symbol of the Barkley family came into view and beyond that, the outline of the large house framed in the welcoming light of love.  Had his ride not been so urgent, he would have marveled at the beauty of the site.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod reined his horse just outside of the Barkley home, "Ciego.....Ciego...!"

 

"Si?" He asked stepping from the entrance of the barn.

 

"Send one of the men to town and get Dr. Merar...hurry, and ready a wagon."

 

"Si, senor."  Ciego hurried to do as Jarrod asked.

 

Jarrod ran up the steps to the main house and threw open the door, "Mother!  Mother.....Audra....Silas?"

 

"Jarrod, your home......"  Seeing the disheveled appearance and unmasked fear in her eldest sons eyes she continued, "Jarrod what's wrong.....were are Nick and Heath?"

 

"There's been an accident on the 'North Ridge', I need to get a wagon."

 

"Oh no, how.....how bad?"

 

"Nick's not hurt to bad, injured his knee and he's got a bump on his head....."

 

"And Heath?"

 

"He wasn't in great shape when I left, but he was holding his own.  I need to hurry."  Turning to Silas, who had enter shortly after he called, he added, "Silas, please bring me some blankets and pillows for the wagon, then go and get a bunk mattress to lay in the back."

 

"Yes Sir, Mr. Barkley."

 

"Jarrod, what happened."  This time it was Audra who spoke, fear etched in her fine features.

 

"It's a long story sis, so to save time, we took a fall down the south face."

 

"I'm coming with you."  Victoria stated.

 

"No Mother, please........I need to do this.......it's a long, hard ride in a wagon, and I don't know what I'm going to find when I get there.  Stay here with Audra and I'll be back as soon as I can."

 

"Jarrod, I can't just sit and worry......."

 

"Please Mother."

 

Victoria saw the pleading in Jarrod's eyes and relented, "Okay dear, but do hurry....and be careful."

 

"I will, Mother."  Jarrod gave Victoria a hug and kiss on the cheek, turning, he did the same for Audra, "I'll be back as soon as I can.  I'll bring them home safe."

 

"I know you will, dear."

 

Jarrod turned and left the house, striding toward the wagon, he noticed that some of the hands had gathered to see what they could do to help, Duke was the first to speak, "Jarrod, what can we do, what happened."

 

"I need two men to come with me, Nick and Heath have been hurt."

 

Before he could finish, Duke and another hand, Dave Tanner, climbed up on the wagon, "We'll go."  Duke announced.

 

"Good."  Climbing on the wagon himself, he turned to Ciego, who was leading Jingo toward the barn, "Ciego, take good care of him."

 

"Si, I will."

 

With a flick of his wrist, he put the wagon in motion, beginning the long travel back to the ridge.

 

Nick laid quietly on his side, keeping a close eye on his injured companion.  Heath's breathing had evened out and he seemed to be resting a little easier.  Nick pushed himself over the couple of feet that separated them, pulling the corner of the blanket down, he was relieved to see that there was less blood on the bandages.  A good sign.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Nick?" Nick was startled but recovered quickly.

 

"Yeah?"

 

I....I want ta.....thank you....for....helpin me....out."

 

Nick looks at Heath and frowns, "Don't mention it," Nick sees Heath nod, "You didn't think I'd let ya get worse, did ya?"

 

"Wasn't....so....sure."

 

"I'm not a monster, Heath."

 

"I...figured....you'd do...the same...for anyone."

 

"Damn right."  Nick saw a question forming on Heath's lips and waited patiently.  In the mean time, he reached for the nearest canteen and offered Heath a drink.

 

After taking a large drink, Heath pressed on, "Nick?"

 

"What."

 

Why...don't...you...like...me....beside...the obvious."

 

Nick was taken back, the directness of the question was something he would have expected, but it still stung.  He knew he needed to answer him.  He decided now would be as good a time as any to say what was on his mind.  "I....you just came into our lives and....well destroyed everything we/I fought so hard to protect.  This family means more to me than anything, and to see my Mother hurt because of something you say is true, well I just can't stand for that."

 

"But it...is true."

 

"So you say, but that doesn't make it right."

 

"Do you feel...I'm lyin'?"

 

Nick thought long and hard before he answered, "Jarrod told me he believes that you believe what you say is true.  That's just not enough."

 

"So, you'll...never except me?" Heath coughed, trying to keep his injured body from failing him.

 

"I may except the fact that you're here, but I don't know about excepting you as a Barkley, or a brother."  Nick kept his voice even, knowing that his words were hurting the blond cowboy.

 

Heath gasped, the pain he felt at those few words cut like a knife through his heart.  "I didn't....mean....for...things to....turn out..like....this.....I....was....keepin....a promise...."  Another cough wrenched the silence.  A hard painful cough that made it hard to catch his breath.

 

Nick, feeling a hint of concern, made his way to Heath, "Calm down, you're working yourself up over nothing."

 

"It's not....nothing.....you don't....understand."  Heath took great gulps of air as new pain assaulted his senses, "Mamma made....me promise...to...find you."

 

Nick felt a little saddened by those words, "You did, you did keep your promise."

 

"I tried......I just can't...."  Heath became more agitated.

 

"I said calm down, boy you never listen to a thing I tell you!" Nick said reaching to calm Heath.

 

Heath weakly pushed his hand away, "I said.....don't call me....boy!" Heath struggled to raise up, in an effort to made good his threat should Nick repeat the name he so hated.

 

"Lay down...."

 

"No....I....will not...be called boy...never again....."  Heath collapse back down on the bedroll, "They...called...me...boy...I...hate....it."

 

Nick fixed the blanket, checking Heath's wound before placing it over him fully.  "Who?"

 

Heath fought for control, knowing that Nick probably wouldn't believe him, he knew that if there was any chance of making Nick stop calling him that, he would have to explain.  Something he wasn't sure he could do.  Making a decision to trust someone who clearly didn't trust him, he answered, "The guards."

 

"Guards?" Nick asked a little confused.

 

"Prison....guards."

 

"You were in prison, I knew it.......I had a feeling...."  Nick stopped his rant at the sight of the faint, negative shake of Heath's head.

 

"Carterson...."

 

Nick felt sick, he had heard horror stories attached to that place.  A prisoner of war camp all feared when in the war between the states.  "You were in Carterson.?"

 

"Yes."

 

Narrowing his eyes, Nick did the math, "You couldn't have been more than...."

 

"Fifteen."

 

Nick ran a shaky hand through his hair at this new revelation, he could tell Heath was telling the truth, one just didn't say they were in Carterson, you could see the horror in there face when they spoke the words.  "You're not lying."

 

"No."

 

"My God......I.....Heath...I'm sorry."  Sincerity broke free, followed closely by compassion and respect.  He had no idea of the life of this young man.  The hell he went through and the torture dealt by the hands of those monsters.

 

Heath turned his head, "You didn't....do anything......"

 

"Yes, yes I did.  I had no idea......"

 

"You're.....the first person....I've told.....that didn't....already know.  I.....don't usually talk about.....it."

 

Nick felt his heart swell for the first time in regards to this person, the dam broke with emotion as the enormity of what Heath had sacrificed by telling him this.  "Why'd you tell me?"

 

"I.....don't know.....I....guess.....I....thought....that's....what...brothers.....do."

 

"Heath..."

 

"Don't....I don't....want....your....pity."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Nick fought with his overwrought emotion, he was wrong, so very wrong, this person, this brother was so much more.  Weeks of pushing him away when he should have embraced him, thanked him for finding them.  He should have been the shoulder Heath needed, the confidant, the protector from the demons of the night that he was sure plagued this young man.  He should have welcomed him with a handshake and an acceptance that only a family can provide.  Unconditional love and support.  Heath should have been with them all along, growing up with the love of a complete family and not have had to endure the hardships of the life he lived.  His father should have made sure there was no child.  He should never have blamed Heath for something that was out of his control.  Heath was a victim, a child of circumstance.  Nick knew what he needed to do, turn back time to the very first revelation, to the day Heath entered their home and became a Barkley.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"I'm not gonna give you any.  I would like to give you something though."

 

"What?"

 

Nick stuck his hand out and waited, seeing the suspicion in Heath's eyes, he smiled, "Come on, I'm not gonna bite ya."

 

Heath painfully tugged his right hand out from under the cover and grasped Nick's.

 

"I'd like to introduce myself, I'm Nick Barkley......and I'm your big brother."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Heath held the hand firm, he didn't know what to say.  This man, his brother, had just extended his hand in friendship, in acceptance.  His sweat covered brow wrinkled in confusion.  Didn't he, Nick, tell him he may never accept him as a brother, or a Barkley?  Was this pity, a misguided attempt at calming the pain of his injuries?  Or was it something else.  He stared at the dark cowboys face, searching for any hint of deception and found none.  What he found was a sincerity that he had never seen, had never had the privilege to experience from anyone other than his own family in Strawberry.  Heath gripped the hand tighter, it felt good to finally know that he had made it over the final obstacle.  He never wanted to let go of this hand, it represented the family as a whole, by Nick accepting him, the Barkley family could rest easy.  Heath could rest easy.  A small grin graced his pained features.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Nice...to...finally....meet ya....I'm....Heath."

 

Nick waited for more, when it didn't come he gently pushed for what he wanted to hear, "I didn't catch the last name?"

 

"Barkley,....I'm.....Heath....Barkley."

 

A huge grin lit the tan cowboys handsome face, It was all he could do to keep from slapping Heath on the shoulder in delight.

 

"You're....not...gonna...hug me.....are ya?" Heath teased.

 

"Naw, I'll save that for when the women folk are around.  You blush so well, I think they'll get a kick out of it."

 

"You....wouldn't...."

 

"I might."

 

"I'll sue.....I know....a damn....good....lawyer."

 

Nick's smile was endless, he never noticed what a quick wit and dry sense of humor this new brother possessed.  He laughed as hard as his injuries would allow.  "Little brother, you and I are gonna get along just fine.....just fine indeed."

 

Nick's laughter was contagious and Heath found himself laughing with him, until a coughing fit caused them both to sober.

 

"Heath, you okay?" Nick asked reaching for the canteen again.

 

"Yeah, would sure .....like to have.....another drink....throats kinda....dry."

 

"Figured you might."  Helping Heath to raise his head, he held the canteen.  "Not to much, that's good......feel better?"

 

"Yeah, thanks," Heath tried to form the words in his mind before he spoke, "....Nick...."

 

"Wait a minute.....if you're gonna apologize again for what happened, don't.  It wasn't your fault, it wasn't Jarrod's fault....."

 

"It wasn't....your fault."

 

"Right, it wasn't my fault....it just happened.  It was an accident."  Nick moved best he could to throw a few pieces of wood on the fire, "Jarrod should be at the house by now, probably on is way back.  You need to try and get some rest, hopefully, by the time you wake up in the morning, we'll be loaded in a wagon and heading for home."

 

"Home."

 

"Yes, home....your home, our home, don't you ever think of it as anything less.....do you here me?"

 

"Yes Nick.....I've never....had....a problem....hearin' ya."

 

"Good."  Nick took a double take, "You got a smart mouth on you, bo.....little brother."

 

Heath grinned, "I like.....that....better."

 

"What?"

 

"Little....brother."

 

Nick returned the smile, "Me too, now get to sleep, I'll be right here if you need anything."

 

"Thanks......"  Heath slowly closed his eyes, his heart light with the acceptance of the one person he had strived to gain it from.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

As the evening wore on, Nick napped, keeping a hand on Heath's shoulder should he move or need anything.  The slightest movement from Heath would have Nick up and over checking on his injured brother.  During one such check, Nick had seen the signs of an impending nightmare.  Instinct kicked in and within minutes, he had the blond cowboy calmed and sleeping peacefully.  Nick knew, from having a room next to Heath's, that the young Barkley had frequent nightmare, though not loud, moans and pleading word would drift through the peaceful silence of the house.  Vowing from this point on, he would battle the unseen demon's with Heath, together.  No more will he be alone in the night, the fierceness of the family unit, and a brothers love, would push those who wish to haunt Heath, back into the hell from whence they came.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Nick awoke the next morning with two, very blue, very amused eyes staring back at him.  Nick smiled back, and made to move closer to the fire.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"You look better."  Nick said "Think you can eat a little?"

 

"Yeah, don't...think I can eat much...though."

 

"It's alright, probably best you didn't....."

 

"Did you eat at all.....yesterday?"

 

"Some, I chewed on some of that god awful jerky Audra made.  You were sleeping or I'd a offered you some."

 

Heath chuckled at the look of distaste on Nick face, "Na, probably best....I was sleepin'."

 

"Yep, I love Audra dearly, she's perfect in every way.....except one."

 

"She can't cook."  They said together with a laugh.

 

"She does try though....."  Nick paused with a tilt of his head, "Do ya hear that......"  Nick listened a little more, "That's a wagon!  They're here little brother!  They made it!"

 

"I don't hear anything."

 

"You will....listen."

 

Heath strained to hear what Nick did, finally a far off voice was heard....it was Jarrod calling to them.  "I hear...them....I hear Jarrod!"

 

"JARROD!!!" Nick yelled.

 

"Nick....please warn me...when you're gonna...do...that."

 

"Sorry Heath."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

What seemed like an eternity later, a very exhausted and worn Jarrod crested over the edge of the south face, followed closely by Duke and Dave.  His smile did little to express the joy he felt when he had seen his two injured brothers smiling back at him.  He could see the tension from the weeks before had been replace with a easy camaraderie, an understanding had been reached, Jarrod was sure of that.  Nick no longer held the scowl of resentment, in it's place was a warm and caring smile.  Jarrod watched as Nick helped Heath to better see his rescuers, the care he showed in not causing any pain.  This was brotherhood at it's finest, a moment Jarrod would always carry in heart.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"What took you so long."  Nick said with a welcoming grin.

 

"Now Nick, a rescue takes time."  Jarrod smiled, turning to Heath, "You look better, how do you feel?"

 

"Still sore, and cold.....kinda dizzy.....but other than that....I'm fine."

 

Jarrod looked at Nick, the fondness held in the expressive eyes shone brightly, something he'd hope, but never thought he'd see, "That's good news....let me have a look at the wound."

 

"I kept it clean through out the night, used the last of the bandages early this morning."  Nick stated as he watched Jarrod lift the blanket and pear under the white strips of material.

 

"Well Nick, you done a good job taking care of Heath.  It looks a little redder than yesterday, but I think the whiskey helped.  Probably even saved his life."  Jarrod saw the look of pride at his words.

 

"Thanks, brother.  Now....how bout you cowpokes help us off this damn hill, Heath and I want to get home."

 

Duke and Dave shot each other a confused look, obviously something happened on this hill that turned a cold, unfeeling heart where Heath was concerned, back into the Nick from weeks ago.  "Sure thing, Boss."  Duke said with a relieved grin.

 

As they started toward Nick, they were stopped, "You get Heath, Jarrod can help me down."  Frowning, he added, "And be careful!"

 

With a nod of there heads, Duke and Dave each took a side of the blanket, grabbing the corners and lifting it gently.  A small groan and a sharp breath stopped them in mid-lift.  "Okay there Heath?" Duke asked concerned.

 

"Yeah, don't stop.  I'm....all right."

 

Duke and Dave carried there burden with utmost care, there muscles strained with the effort.  Making there way slowly toward the south face and down the gentle slop to the waiting wagon.  Placing Heath in the back on top of the mattress, they settled him more comfortably and turned to help Jarrod as he struggled to bring Nick down the incline.

 

A few minutes later, Nick was place next to Heath and situated so that he could lean against the back board.  After catching his breath, Nick spoke, "You two get our horses and put out that fire.  I'll see ya both at the ranch.....and......thanks."

 

Dave, who was new to the Barkley ranch, smiled at the small word.  Thanks was something you don't hear much at other ranches, but he found that it was common place here.  The Barkley's were always thanking there men for doing a good job.  He admired that in all of them but especially Nick and Heath.  "You're welcome Boss."  He answered as Duke and he made there way to do as there boss had instructed.

 

Nick gave an authoritative nod and turned to Heath, noticing the light sheen of sweat forming on his little brother's brow, he laid his hand on the slightly flushed face.  "You've got a fever, don't worry, won't be to long and we'll be home."

 

Jarrod climbed up on the wagon, "Okay boys, let's head for home."

 

Nick and Heath both gasped as the wagon lurched forward.  "Jarrod, take it easy, will ya."

 

"Sorry Nick, couldn't help it."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod heard Nick speak softly to Heath, catching words like, 'be okay' and 'little brother' caused his heart to glow.  Nick used that voice only for his family, this was the true Nick, a compassionate man with a heart of gold.  A true champion of the sick and injured Heath.  It was obvious to Jarrod that Nick now held a spot in his heart for this new addition to there family.  He knew that the arguing would probably still continue, brothers will fight, but the mean, angry words and cruel intentions will be a thing of the past.

 

As for Heath.....the fever worried him.  He had heard the declaration from Nick as he came around the wagon and had stopped at the dreaded statement.  Fever meant infection, and infection meant there journey was only beginning.  The battle lines drawn, they would fight this deadly foe and come out victors.  They had to.  Heath was to important to them to give up without a fight.

 

Jarrod traveled the all to familiar path back home.  In hindsight, he wished he had asked them to bring the doctor and meet them on the trail.  They had a good half days ride left in the wagon before reaching the comforts of home.  A lot could happen in that length of time, and Jarrod was concerned the fever, just a slight irritant, would blossom into a life threatening seriousness with tragic result.  One didn't take any type of fever lightly, not in this day and age, but hopefully, with the new advancements in medicine and modern resources at their disposal they would be the victors.

 

Nick's injuries also worried him, the knee was swollen and looked painful.  Though Nick never really complained, he felt that his middle brother was in much more pain that he let on.  Curbing his own discomfort to take care of the more serious of the two.  Every bump was readily felt, knowing that his brother's pain was worse than his own, he could only imagine how the bone jarring motion of the wagon was effecting them.  Yet, there was no sound coming from the back, no complaints were heard, just a pristine silence that echoed the thoughts of there hopes and fears, there wants, there need to get everyone home, safe and sound.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Needing to break the silence, Jarrod spoke, "Nick, you two all right back there?"

 

Nick turned and caught Jarrod's worried glance, "Yeah, he's got a fever, but he's....."

 

"I'm right here.....don't have....to....talk...around me."  Heath added

 

"Sorry Heath, thought you were sleeping."  Nick grinned.

 

"Doing all right, Heath?  Need me to stop?"

 

"No...s'alright, just.....feel like....I'm breakin'.....an ornery.....horse."

 

Jarrod and Nick both grinned at the show of humor from Heath, "I reckon this'll be good practice for breaking that black we bought last week."  Nick stated, still grinning.

 

Heath grinned up at his new found friend and brother, "Reckon so."

 

"You know, I'm really impressed with the way you two have worked things out....don't suppose you'll let me in on the reason behind the turn a round?"

 

"Well...Jarrod...I just got to thinkin', and I figured I didn't give ol' Heath here a chance, we started talking, then, using my great reasoning skills, decided that Heath wasn't half bad."

 

"Bull----"

 

"Now Heath, you're not gonna ruin a perfectly good story with fowl language, are you."

 

"If the...story you're...tellin...is...bull, then yeah, I suppose."

 

"Let me guess what happened," Jarrod appeared to be deep in thought, then smiled, "You, Nick, where you're usual stubborn, mule headed self, wouldn't give brother Heath here a chance, and said a few thing that, I'm sure, you'll regret later."  Jarrod watch as Nick mouth flew open ready to fire back, "And Heath, you quietly took what Nick was throwing at you, because you respect and admire his opinion.  Not wanting to cause more damage that was already done.  You look up to him, because he is most like the person you always felt a brother should be.....am I close?"

 

Nick's head jerk down to look at Heath, waiting for a reply, "Heath?"

 

"Not entirely," Seeing Nick deflate a little at those words, Heath continued, "It's true, I do....well...I look up to ya, I admire.....ya and respect ya....  that's for sure.  Been wantin...to tell ya that...for a while now, but its not...just Nick that....was most like....what....I thought...a...brother should be."  Heath swallowed the pain and pushed back a cough, "It's....both of....ya.  Two sides....of the...same....coin."

 

Jarrod stopped the wagon and stepped over the set to make eye contact with Heath, "Heath, thank you for that, that's means a lot to me."  Jarrod gently brushed hair from Heath's sweaty forehead, "I'd say you fit that bill just as well.  For never having been a brother before, you're doing a damn good job.  If it were my choice to choose a brother for Nick and me, I would have most definitely chosen you."  Jarrod grinned at the slight blush.

 

"Thanks Jarrod."

 

Nick, who had remained quiet cleared his throat, "That goes for me to, I'm sorry for all the....for all I did to ya, Jarrod was right, I wouldn't give ya a chance and I would have regretted it till my dying day.  You are a Barkley, and I was blind to not have seen it before."

 

"Don't suppose I can have a drink sense we're stopped, kinda thirsty."  Heath asked a little choked up.

 

Jarrod grabbed the closest canteen and helped Heath.  Taking a few good drinks, Heath smiled his thanks and looked at Nick, "Thanks Nick.....I bet that was hard....for you to say."

 

"Little brother, you have no idea."  Nick chuckled.

 

"Well, If you don't mind, I hear a nice meal and warm bed calling my name, let's get going."  Jarrod said with a slap to his thigh as he stood.

 

"Sounds mighty fine...."  Heath added.

 

"Yep, anythings better that this here cow hide jerky Audra sent."  Nick spat the clump of chewed jerky over the side of the wagon, "Been suckin' on that bite for an hour now and it still won't soften up."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

The full belly laugh heard from the floor of the wagon was like food to a starving man.  Interrupted by an occasional moan from the pain the laugh inflicted, Heath's laughter was the mirror image of his father.  Jarrod and Nick exchanged knowing looks then joined in the joy of the moment.  Jarrod flicked the reins and the wagon once again began it's journey, a little lighter perhaps, the weight of past weeks left high on the hill, atop the plateau of the 'North Ridge."

 

The Mid afternoon sun shown brightly, the few clouds did little to conceal the heat it produced.  Jarrod pondered the time as the final leg of the journey loomed before them.  Though dry from the lack of rain, the flat stretch of pasture was riddled with holes.  Some small, but many large enough to cause pain to the occupants resting in the back.  He knew he would need to keep a weary eye out for any such holes and avoid them as best he could.  Salvation waited just beyond the hill, but at the cost of causing discomfort, they would need to take it slow.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Jarrod, why we slowin' down?" Nick asked as a rather large bump was felt.

 

"This part's pretty rough, thought I'd better take it slow.  How's it going back there?"

 

Nick glanced fondly at the man lying next to him, "I think his fever's getting higher.  He seems hotter than before...."  Frowning Nick continued, "I'm worried Jarrod.  He seemed better this morning."

 

"He probably has an infection, I'm sure we didn't get all the dirt out when we cleaned the wound.......why don't you bathe his face with a wet clothe, that might help.....a little."

 

Nick nodded and tore the sleeve off his shirt.  Wetting the torn material with water from the canteen, he began to wipe the young cowboys face.  "Come on Heath, we didn't come this far to have you get sick on us.....fight!  You hear me, you better fight this...."

 

"Doing.....the....best...I.......can."  Came the quiet words.

 

Nick sighed with relief, "I know you are.....we're close......we'll be home soon.  Just hang on......"

 

Heath couldn't deny the words, he knew he had to fight.  Defeat was not an option.  Heath was determined to not let this man....these men Down...., "Don't.....worry....Nick......been through....worse.....and survived."

 

"That's right, but you were alone then, this time you have us, you won't have to fight this battle by yourself.  Just relax and hang on."

 

"I will....."  Heath's head lolled to the side.

 

"Heath?" Nick fearfully looked at Jarrod, "Hurry, Jarrod........."

 

Making eye contact with Nick, Jarrod's own fear surfaced.  Holes be damned, he urged the team faster over the rough terrain.  It would do no good to spare the uncomfortable ride, if one of them should suffer in the end.  'Please God......help us.' He thought as the wagon lurched and swayed over the pitted ground.  "Hang on Nick, just hang on."  He said aloud.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Finally, after a rough, hellish ride, they crested the hill.  Heath's fever was getting dangerously high, Nick efforts causing little effect to the heat ravishing the body he so wanted to save.  Nick knew it was only a matter of time and they would be home, less than an hour and his brother would be in the care of the doctor.  Fear bubbled to the surface as his ministrations were soaked up by the heated flesh.  Nick's heart broke as Heath's fever infested words floated over him.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"N'ck?"

 

"Im right here."

 

"So....hot......"

 

"I know.....it's gonna be all right....."  Nick looked into the distance, "I see the house, Heath.....you made it.  We made it.....just a little further......"

 

"Don't....want....to....leave"

 

"Now you listen...."  Nick started as he wiped his eyes, "you are not going anywhere......you hear me.....I won't let you......"

 

"Boss......y"

 

"Bossy?  Me?  Yeah, I guess I am, so you better listen to me."

 

"'Kay."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod pulled the wagon into the yard.  Duke and Dave, who had obviously taken the pass to beat them home, waited with other hands to aid in getting the brothers to the house.  Jumping off the wagon, he noticed his mother, along with Audra and Doctor Merar, running towards them.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"I'm sorry you had to wait so long, Doc."  Jarrod said as he made his way towards his ill brother.

 

"Not to worry, Jarrod.....I didn't get here till a few hours ago, I had another emergency when your man caught me last night.  He told me it would probably be afternoon before you got here."  Turning to the ranch hands, he said, "Let's get these two upstairs."

 

Nick felt hands trying to pull him away from the semi-conscious man next to him, "No!"

 

"Nick, honey, we need to get you both upstairs....please let them help you?" Victoria pleaded.

 

Nick turned red eyes to Victoria, "Mother?"

 

"Yes dear, I'm here."

 

"He's real sick......I tried to help him....."

 

"I know, honey.......he's going to be fine.....and so are you."  Victoria felt tears surface at the heartbreak behind the words.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Nick nodded and let the hands help him out of the wagon.  Seeing that his brother was indeed safe, the emotional fatigue and pain of his own injuries made themselves known.  Jarrod saw the signs and was at Nick's side catching his brother in his arms as he slowly began to sink.  The hands helping Nick adjusted there hold and carried the exhausted Barkley into the house and up the stairs into his room.

 

Four other hands, including both Duke and Dave, pick Heath up and carried him in much the same fashion as they did when they carried him down the hill.  Careful not to jostle him, they made there way to the house.  Duke was deep in thought as he helped with the task.  He had told the other hands after there return from the 'north ridge' that Nick had obviously changed his attitude towards Heath.  That a understanding had been reached.  It seemed that Nick no longer held any anger towards the newcomer, in fact, he was certain that the two were becoming close.  The hands each nodded there heads, understanding what Duke was telling them, there treatment of the new Barkley would change for fear of retribution from his older brother.  Nick's anger was not to be taken lightly, they understood that, from now on, Heath was to be treated as a Barkley and to be given the same respect as they would the others, nothing less.

 

Doctor Merar sat next to Heath, the fever worried him, but the wound was well taken care of.  Jarrod had told him they had to use whiskey to disinfect the wound, which in turn probably save this young man from encountering untold pain and sickness at the hands of the silent killer.  However, the whiskey didn't clear out all the foreign matter embedded in the ugly gash.  He took the steps necessary to finish the cleaning and bandage the wound more thoroughly.  Feeling the presence of the family, minus Nick behind him, the Doctor finished his task and turned to speak to the worried Barkley's.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Dr. Merar, how is Heath?  Will he be okay?" Victoria asked.

 

"Victoria, his fever is a bit higher than I would like it to be....but he's made it this far....I don't see why he won't make a full recovery.  I finished cleaning the wound and bandaged it, it looks rather angry, and it will be quit painful, but it should heal with no problems.  The head injury, from what Jarrod has told me, doesn't seem as severe as it looks, he was awake and coherent most of the time.  It looks to, like he has some tenderness in his ribs, but nothing appears to be broken.  All in all, I'd say this young man is lucky."

 

A sob of relief was heard from Audra as she hugged Jarrod, quiet words of comfort whispered in her ear.  Victoria smiled and raised her head upwards in silent thanks for the safe return of her sons.  After composing herself, she spoke, "Thank you Doctor."

 

"Your welcome, Victoria.  Someone will have to stay with him of course, bathe him with cool water to keep the fever down, but I doubt that will be a problem.  Why don't we go next door and check on Nick, I'm sure he's anxious to know how Heath's doing."

 

"Yes let's."  Victoria led Audra and the doctor to the door, she noticed that Jarrod wasn't following, "Jarrod?"

 

"I'm fine, Mother, I'm gonna stay with Heath for a little bit.  Just in case he wakes up."  Jarrod made his way to the bed and sat quietly next to Heath.

 

"Doctor, Audra will show you to Nick's room, I'll be right there."  Victoria turned and made her way to her eldest, putting a soft hand on his slumped shoulders she spoke, "Jarrod dear, he's going to be fine.  He's strong."

 

"I know, Mother.....it's just....I have to admit....I was a little afraid he wouldn't be there when I got back.  I wanted this trip to bring us together, and in reality it did, but I didn't want it to be like this.  I could have very easily lost one, or both of my brothers and that would have....."

 

"Dear, please don't think about that.....your intentions were noble, you were worried about your family and you desired to bring them the kind of relationship they needed.  I'm very proud of you for wanting your brothers to get past there differences.  You did nothing wrong."

 

"I realize that....it still," Jarrod shook his head, "I think I'm just overly tired, I'm having trouble saying what I feel.

 

"Please rest, you've had an exhausting week, it won't do you or your brothers any good if you get sick."

 

"Just a few more minutes, Mother.  Then I'll go get cleaned up and rest.  I promise."

 

Victoria sigh at the stubborn streak her eldest shown.  He held that trait as much as the rest of them, just never let it show as often.  "Okay, but I'm going to hold you to that."  Victoria lightly kiss Jarrod's check and went to check on her middle son.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Alone in the room with Heath, Jarrod's mind raced with visions from the days prior.  He had to admit, things did turn out, but at what cost.  Nick seemed to have excepted Heath, but was the acceptance true or was it fear.  Jarrod knew that he needed to talk to Nick to find out more of there time on the hill.  Heath was a smart man, if Nick was telling Heath what he thought Heath wanted to hear...that would never do.  It's all or nothing.  Jarrod was sure that Nick's feeling were genuine, but the force driving the feeling was what he wanted to make clear.  They never really told him what happened, just skimmed the surface.  Nick and Heath would need to get past this part of the journey, get well, then see if what happened was enough.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod noticed movement on the bed, "Heath?"

 

"Jarrod.....home?"

 

"Yes, we're home.....Dr. Merar said you're gonna be fine."

 

"Don't feel....fine."

 

"You have a fever.  Doc said the wound looks pretty good considering.  He said you're gonna be sore for a few days, you'll be in bed for a little while."

 

"Nick?"

 

"Doc's in with him now.  We should know something soon."

 

Heath frowned, then nodded his head, "You....need....sleep."

 

"I'm heading that way now, if you don't need anything....."

 

"Go, I'm....fine."

 

Jarrod stood, "I'll tell the rest of the family you're awake."  Patting Heath lightly on the arm, Jarrod turned and made his way to Nick's room.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Heath grinned tiredly at his retreating brothers back.  It was going to take some getting use to......being a member of a family.  He knew that all would not be as easy as it was right now.  He guessed that any step was a good step, and a fall is expected once in a while but as long as he made progress, he could handle an occasional fall.

 

Nick grumbled as Dr. Merar examined the injuries.  "I'm fine, how's Heath?"

 

"Heath is resting in the other room.  We need to take care of you at the moment."  Dr. Merar shot back, he had taken care of the Barkley boys for many a year, he knew how to handle the ornery side's as well as the injuries.  "Nick, it doesn't look like it's broken...."

 

"I coulda told ya that."

 

"AND the cut on your head won't need stitches, but you do need to stay off this leg for a while, give it time to heal.  You've more than likely given it a bad sprain, not much I can do but wrap it, you need to try and keep ice on it to get the swelling down.  Thank you can do that....Nick?"

 

"Yeah, I can do that......"

 

"Good boy, now I'll leave you something for pain should you need it."  Turning to Victoria he added, "I cleaned the wound on his head, it wasn't deep, but do keep an eye on it.  Change the bandage as needed.  If it seems to be getting red, or infected send someone to fetch me.  Otherwise, I'll be back in a couple of days to check on them."  Addressing Nick again he said, "Nick, if you seem dizzy or have any nausea, you let your mother know."

 

Nick nodded.

 

"Very good, now....."

 

Jarrod interrupted the doctor's farewell, "Mother, Heath's awake."

 

Nick made a move to get up and was quickly held in place by the loving glare delivered to him by Victoria.  "You stay put, young man, If you try that again....."  Victoria wagged her finger at Nick.

 

"Yes, Mother."

 

"Good."  Turning to Jarrod, "Thank you, Jarrod.....that's wonderful news."  Victoria beamed.

 

"Why don't I check on him again before I go, sense he's awake, I can ask him a few questions."  Dr. Merar said as he grabbed his bag and left the room.

 

Victoria followed, "Jarrod, please go and get some rest."

 

"I will, Mother."

 

"Audra, would you mind getting me a basin of cool water and a towel?"

 

"Of course, Mother....I'll be right back."  Audra left to do as her mother asked.

 

"Mother?"

 

"Yes Nick?"

 

"Tell Heath......that I'll come and visit him as soon as I can."

 

"I will, dear now you just rest and I'll have Silas bring you something to eat.  I'm sure you're hungry."

 

"I am pretty hungry...."  Nick stated hearing his belly grumble.

 

"Jarrod, maybe you should eat before you lie down."  Victoria asked as she noticed Jarrod still standing by the door.

 

"I think I'm more tired than hungry....how about I take a rain check on the meal."  Jarrod hugged Victoria, "Nick, I'll come back later."

 

"Fine and Pappy...."

 

"Yes brother Nick?"

 

"Thanks."  Nick grinned.

 

"You're very welcome."  Jarrod smiled brightly, Nick's thanks were for more than the rescue, he could see it in his eyes.  He just hoped he was as confident once the two were well and the discussion was done.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Deciding to not think about it anymore, Jarrod followed his mother out into the hall and turned toward his own room.  The soft bed beckoned him, the cool sheets waiting to be warmed.  Jarrod slipped into the familiar surrounding and closed the door.  As he unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off, he realized that he probably should have cleaned up before lying down.  His aching body told him that the clean up could wait, sleep was what he needed now, he would worry about a bath later.  Setting on the edge of the bed, he pulled off his boots and set them side by side next to the bedside table.  Socks were next, thrown one at a time atop the dirty shirt.  Deciding to for go the night shirt, he pulled the bed cover and sheet back and climbed in.  Sleep engulfed him as soon as his head hit the pillow.

 

Victoria sat quietly by Heath's side.  The fever, having peeked not long after Dr. Merar left, had been a constant battle for the better of three hours.  All her effort were rebuffed by the heat, the cool towel quickly warmed by the vile threat.  She knew all to well how quickly a fever could turn, and the effects it could have on a body.  Victoria thought back to when she and Dr. Merar had enter the room, the frown, expertly hidden, by their long time doctor and friend.  She remembered Dr. Merar asking Heath questions, standard when someone was suffering from a head injury, and Heath's hesitant replies.  Though he answered all questions correctly, it was an effort to speak.  This, too, worried her.  She gently held his hand as the fever took hold more fiercely.  Calmed his ramblings with quiet words and touches.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Momma....."

 

"I'm here, son.........you just rest."  Victoria said as she ran a soothing hand through his sweaty hair.

 

"I....I'm.....so......hot......please....."

 

"I know, dear......"

 

Heath's hand flailed as he tried to reach for Victoria, "I want.....to.....stay......I'm.....so.....tired."

 

Victoria caught Heath's hand in hers, "Heath, you're here, you're staying......."  Silent tears glided un noticed down her cheek.

 

"I....love you."

 

"I love you, too.....please Heath....you have to fight this.....for me....for you're brothers and sister.....please fight."  Victoria saw Audra come into the room with a fresh basin of water.

 

"Audra, please run and get Silas."

 

"Mother, what's wrong?"

 

"He's getting worse, please, hurry now."

 

Audra quickly put the basin on the dresser and left.

 

"Momma........Momma!  Don't go!"

 

"Oh Dear God, he's talking to Leah."  Victoria put her hand to her mouth, "Heath, honey please.......open your eyes for me, look at me Heath."

 

Heath's eyes slowly opened, "Momma?"

 

"Heath, it's me...it's...Mother."

 

"Mother?" Heath looked around the room, "Ma'am, were........."

 

"We're in your room, dear.  You're going to be just fine."

 

"My room......."  Heath gave a soft sigh, and closed his eyes, "I.....was afraid....."

 

"What, Heath?"

 

"I.....left....you."

 

Victoria instantly realized what the one sided conversation meant.  "Never, Heath.  I know you'll never leave us."  Victoria caressed the flushed cheek, "We won't let you leave.....not without a fight."  The calming words seemed to ease Heath's fear.

 

"Mrs. Barkley?" Silas asked standing at the door.

 

"Silas, please run a bath, we may need to cool Heath down that way, be sure and not make it to cold, warm would be better."

 

"Yes, Mrs. Barkley."

 

Audra, please wake Jarrod, we're going to need him."  Victoria heard Nick yelling from the other room, "And Audra, please tell Nick what's wrong, if he doesn't hear from someone soon, he may try to get up."

 

"Yes Mother."

 

A few moments later, Jarrod entered the room, barefoot and shirt half buttoned, "Mother.....Audra said Heath's worse."

 

"Yes Jarrod, his fever has gotten higher, I need your help in getting him in the tub."  Victoria looked at Jarrod, "I'm sorry to wake you dear, but I couldn't do it by myself."

 

"That's fine, Mother......let me help you."  Jarrod walked over and pulled the covers from Heath's heated body, noticing that Heath still wore his britches he went to work unbuttoning the pants and working them down.  "Mother, maybe it would be best to leave his underpants on, you know how shy Heath is."  Jarrod said as he made sure the bandages were still secure.

 

"Yes, dear, I think that would be best."  Victoria answered knowing how modest her new son was, if he was to find out that she was, in fact, in the room during his time of undress, he would surely be embarrassed.

 

Jarrod finished the task, turning he asked, "Get Silas, Mother.....he can help me lift him and get him to the tub."

 

Victoria quick left and returned with Silas in tow, "Mr. Jarrod, let me help you with Mr. Heath."  Together, they lifted and carried a semi-conscious Heath to the bath and gently laid him in the cooling water.  A gasp was the only thing heard during his descent in the tub.

 

Victoria crouched down and began wringing water from the hand towel to cover the parts of Heath's body that were not submersed.  "Heath, you're going to be fine.....you hear me......"

 

"Cold....."

 

"I know dear."

 

Jarrod pulled Silas aside to speak to him, "Silas, get Duke and have him send one of the men to town to get Dr. Merar."  Jarrod noticed Victoria's nod of approval and he gave her a supportive smile.

 

"Yes, Mr. Jarrod."

 

"Jarrod?"

 

Audra stood uncertain next to the door to Heath's room, "Honey, why don't you sit with Nick, I'm sure he's anxious and would like the company.  You go know, he'll be okay."

 

"Oh Jarrod, what if.......I don't want to loose him."  Audra sobbed freely at the thought of loosing her new brother.

 

Jarrod quickly went to Audra and hugged her close, "Now, we'll have none of that, remember that this is Heath.  He's a Barkley.  We knew there was a chance the fever would become worse.  He'll pull through, don't give up on him."

 

"I won't.......I'm not......I just hate to see him suffer so."

 

"You go and take care of Nick, we'll come and get you when we're done."  Jarrod gave Audra one last squeeze and a peck on the cheek.

 

"Thank you Jarrod.....I'm sorry."

 

"No need to apologize, I'm just as scared as you are."

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Victoria and Jarrod kept Heath in the tub long after it's warmth had faded, seeing the small shivers, they drained it and placed thick towels over him in an effort to dry him off being careful of the wound, still covered with wet bandages, on his chest.  Silas re entered the bathroom and, with Jarrod's help, they lifted the young man and carried him back to his room.  Victoria left to get clean bed linen and some more towel as Jarrod and Silas went about discarding the wet undergarment and redressing Heath in a warm nightshirt.  Propped on the chair, Heath watched with half lidded eyes as Victoria and Silas made quick work of changing the bed, adding new pillows and a warm quilt.  He was amazed at the caring these people had shown him, and was thankful for it.  This was his family, he felt that more now than ever.  He was taken back when he saw the tears in Victoria's eyes as she spoke to him.  Just like his own mother, she fussed over every detail assuring that it was perfect.  He tried to smile at her when she turned and they made eye contact, the effort was returned one hundred fold.  The bright smile etched with a hint of worry and a heart full of love was aimed at him.  It was at that moment of lucidity, that he realized his mother, this petite women with a will of iron and a heart of gold, would always be there.  To take care of him, to nurse him back to health, to carry him when the weight of the world seemed heavy and unbearable.  This women, who could have easily turned her back, was settling him into her heart and calling him son.  The least he could do, would be to call her.......

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Mother."  It was a statement more than anything.

 

Victoria stood and smiled, the tears forming in her eyes from joy rather than fear, "Yes son, I'm here."  She crossed the short distance and placed a tender hand on his cheek, "We're going to lay you back down now, your fever has gone down a little so you try and rest.  Jarrod has sent for the Doctor, he should be here soon."  Turning to Jarrod she added, "We're going to half to change these wet bandages, please pull his night shirt up to just above the wound and cover him with the quilt, I'll run and get fresh bandages."  She saw Jarrod nod as she left with a gleam of pure elation shining brightly from her expressive eyes.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Jarrod smiled at his mother's gentle way, the sound of this young man calling her mother produced a joy that simply radiated off of her.  Jarrod mused as the task of settling Heath back into bed was done and the wound clearly exposed.  Heath had accepted Jarrod, Nick and Audra's mother as his own.  This step, though small, made them that much closer to being a true family.  The bond strengthening as the love evolved.  In his sickened state, Heath had given Victoria the most precious gift anyone one could give.  The gift of a son.

 

Later that evening, a very tired doctor descended the stairs followed closely by the three mobile Barkley's.  The fever had been pushed back to just a slight warmth, and the patient was sleeping peacefully.  Nick was reassured that Heath would be fine, his injuries rechecked and later settled down for some much need rest.

 

"Victoria, I think the worst is over, just make sure they BOTH stay in bed for a few days and get plenty of rest.  You did right by putting Heath in the bath, you brought his temperature down to a manageable level.  Good thinking."

 

"Thank you Doctor, once again we are in your debt.  I'm sorry for bringing you out again so soon but Heath was becoming delirious, I didn't know what else to do for him."

 

"You did everything right."

 

"Dr. Merar, what about Heath's other injuries.....are they okay?" Audra asked sleepily.

 

"I checked his wound and it seems fine, just keep it clean.  And before you ask, Nick's injuries are doing fine as well.  They're both strong boys and they'll get through this."

 

Saying his final good byes, Dr. Merar left.  Victoria turned to her youngest and oldest, both seemed deep in thought.  "It's late, you two get up to bed, I'll stay with Heath and keep an eye on Nick."

 

"Mother, you can't take care of both of them, let me stay with one of them."  Audra said hiding a small yawn.

 

"Audra's right, you need to rest and taking care of both of them with be difficult.  One of us should stay up to help you."  Jarrod put his arm around his mother and escorted her up the stairs.

 

Victoria thought about what was said.  She knew it would be difficult to keep an eye on both boys, but her heart told her she could do it.  At the top of the stairs, she turned and hugged both children, "If they both wake up and I think I need some help, I'll come and get you, I'm pretty sure they'll sleep through the night, but if they don't, I know I'll have you both there to help me."

 

"Maybe we should have put them in the same room."  Jarrod thought a loud.

 

"If we need to do that, we will.....tomorrow.  Let's see how it goes tonight."  Victoria gently pushed Jarrod and Audra towards there rooms and turned to check on Nick.  Stepping beside his bed, she quietly sat down on the edge and ran a loving hand through his hair, "Nick....so strong........you have such a good heart.......so much like your father."  Victoria whispered, "I'm so very proud of you......I'm very lucky to have such wonderful, caring children.  You're all so different in so many ways, I wouldn't change it for all the money in the world."  Victoria continued here quiet praise, "Heath called me Mother today, I was so happy to hear that come from him.  I've wanted it for so long.  Please understand, Nick.......he feels as much my son and you, Jarrod and Audra do."

 

Nick turned his head slightly into the caress, "I......understand....Mother.  "I'm.......glad......."

 

"Shshsh, I'm sorry....I didn't mean to wake you."

 

Nick pulled Victoria's hand from his face and held it, "I love you, Mother....I'm sorry for the......way......I've acted.  I was.....wrong."

 

"You're never wrong for the way you feel.  All we can do is change it......you don't feel that way any more?"

 

"No......"

 

"Then that's all that matters.....it will all work out."

 

"How is he?  His....fever.....down?"

 

"Yes, he's resting as you should be."

 

"I....need....to....talk to....him."

 

"You will, just give it a day or two and you'll get to see him."

 

"Okay."  Nick closed his eyes and let sleep claim him again.

 

Victoria leaned in and gave her middle son a small kiss on the cheek.  She took the quilt that had been pushed toward the end of the bed and placed it up around his shoulders.  Victoria heard Nick sigh and snuggle deeper into the covers.  She could feel Nick's uncertainty in regards to Heath.  He wanted to do the right thing, and in reality he did, but the feeling that he still had some unanswered questions weighed heavy in her heart.  She didn't know what went on during there time alone, but it must have been eye opening to warrant the outcome that had certainly came to pass.  She would find out tomorrow, when her children were rested, what the details were that lead to two of her sons being injured and one son feeling as though he were at fault.  Victoria had split her time between her two youngest sons, as she thought, both had slept most of the night, only waking when a movement would cause them pain.  Heath's fever was down and Victoria hoped it would stay that way.  She looked at the window and notice the first rays of sun make there presence know.  It was morning and she was thankful for it.  A soft knock brought her out of her peaceful thoughts.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Mother?" Audra asked through the closed door.

 

"Yes dear, come in."

 

Audra opened the door and gave her mother a gentle smile.  "You should go down to breakfast, I'll stay with them."

 

"Thank you, coffee sounds rather good."  Victoria rose and gave her daughter a hug, "Did you sleep well, dear?"

 

"Yes Mother, I sleep fine.  I woke to check on you and the boys earlier this morning but you were all asleep.  I was going to relieve you, but I hated to wake you."

 

"I appreciate that.  I'm sure you, Jarrod and I can all enjoy breakfast together.  Heath's fever has gone down quit a bit and Nick should sleep for a few more hours.  I gave him something for pain close to an hour ago."

 

"If you're sure?" Audra spoke as she fussed over her new older brother.

 

"I am."

 

"Okay then, I'll go wake Jarrod and tell him to meet us downstairs."  Audra grinned and left.

 

Victoria fussed with Heath's quilt, gave him a kiss on the forehead and left to go to Nick's room.  Once there, she mirrored her actions and left to meet Jarrod and Audra down stairs.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Heath woke a with a rather large headache and pain from the chest wound.  He had refused pain medicine when offered and now wished he had taken it.  Looking around, he noticed that his mother was no where in the room.  Hoping that she had left to get some rest, he slowly raised himself into a sitting position.  He remembered little of the previous day, what he did remember was sketchy at best.  The one true memory was of calling Victoria 'Mother' and of the look of pure happiness it had invoked.  Thinking he could try and get up, he painfully made his way to the edge of the bed.  Heath wanted to check on Nick, he knew that he was injured as well and needed to see how he was.  Even if it was just a glimpse, he wanted to make sure that his older brother was well and safe.  The wounds pulled painfully as he made to stand.  Thinking that was as bad as he had figured it would be, he took slow, shuffling steps towards the door pausing to lean on the bed post when a wave of dizziness assaulted him.

 

Shuffle....stop....rest, the progress was slow, but to speed it up would count for him meeting the floor face first and that he could do without.  After a few agonizingly long minutes, he made it to the entrance of Nick's room.  Once there, he peeked in and saw that Nick was awake and frowning at him.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"What are you doing up?" Nick asked from the bed.

 

"Wanted....to....see....how you....were....doing."  Heath answered making the last painful steps to the side of the bed.

 

"Well sit down before you fall down."  Nick stated as he patted the side of the bed.

 

"You're...looking....better."  Heath asked as he sat gratefully.

 

"Feel better, Mother gave me some of that god awful medicine so I'm still kinda sleepy....but I didn't want her fussin' none so I pretended to sleep so she would get some rest.  I think she went down to breakfast."

 

"Nick?" Heath asked after gaining some strength.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Did ya mean what ya said on the 'Ridge'?"

 

"Sure I did, what makes ya think I didn't?"

 

"Well, just didn't want you changin your mind because of what I said.  That's all."

 

"You think I said all that because you told me you'd been in Carterson?"

 

"Yeah, why else would ya change your mind so fast?"

 

"Who said I changed my mind fast....maybe I'd been thinkin' about it for a while and chose that moment to tell ya."

 

"Seemed awful fast to me."

 

"Well you hadn't been in my head.....I'd been kinda wantin' to talk to ya for a while now, but seems every time we did, it ended up in a argument.  I don't think to clear when I get riled up."

 

"Why was ya still treatin' me that way then?"

 

"Old habits die hard.  I guess I thought if I gave an inch, I'da had to give ya a mile......I was really having a hard time with that.  I guess Jarrod thought that too, so that's why he came up with that little huntin' trip.  I guess he made me mad because I don't like anyone to decide for me when and where I'm gonna do something.  I was gonna do it....eventually.....just not then."

 

"I see."  Heath lowered his head.

 

"No, I don't think you do.  You don't understand.....It wasn't easy for me to let go of the anger and hurt.....but I realized that I was aimin' it at the wrong person.  You didn't choose who your parents were.  None of us can.  Well, Father wasn't here for me to lash out at and you were the next best thing.  I'm sorry for what I did, and I know it's gonna take a lot of talking before we can get through this.  But I'm willing to work as long and as hard as it takes to get us through this."

 

Heath nodded, "I'll probably get on your nerves."

 

"Yep, and I'll probably get on yours, brothers do that."

 

"I kinda have a trust problem.....are you sure you have the patience?"

 

"As long as you have patience with me when I'm in one of my bad moods."

 

Heath tried to grin, "I can do that."

 

"Good, you look like you need to rest, you better head back to bed before Mother catches you in here."

 

"Don't think I can make it back there."

 

"Well, let me move over a bit and you can lie down here."  Nick moved over as much as his injuries would allow.

 

"You sure?"

 

"Yep, you're my little brother.....ain't no big deal."

 

Heath smiled and did as his big brother instructed.

 

"Now, get some sleep, when Mother comes in here all in a panic because she can't find ya, I let her know what happened."

 

"Gonna tan....my hide....for sure."

 

"Yeah, probably."

 

"It's....okay.....worth.....it."  Heath said closing his eyes as sleep claimed him.

 

Nick pulled the cover over his sleeping brother, "Yep, sure was....little brother."

 

Victoria, Jarrod and Audra ascended the stairs engaging in conversation as they went.  Jarrod felt a little better, having gotten some sleep, he went over the events from the previous days and decided that it was, indeed an accident.  Rational thinking and a good night sleep cleared the mind and make way for logic.  He should know better than to take blame for something that was clearly out of his hands.  As much as he was telling Nick and Heath to not blame themselves, he was doing the complete opposite and shouldering full responsibility.  He was a lawyer, he knew that blame was a misplaced emotion, what was done was done and there was nothing he or anyone else could do about it.  That, along with a few well chosen words from his Mother, had led him to his conclusion, his brothers were safe, his family was intact and they would move forward.  No looking back, there family structure could only grow stronger as the days, weeks, months and years pasted.  One accident, though terrible, would not bring down the foundation they had built.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

"Mother please, get some rest, I'll look in on Nick and Heath."  Jarrod said trying to push Victoria toward her own room.

 

"I just want to check on them one more time before I go."

 

"Okay, but promise you'll sleep."

 

"I will, dear."  Victoria reached Heath's room and stopped at the door.  "He's gone!" She said rather loudly.

 

Jarrod and Audra were by her side in an instant.  "Were could he have gone?" Jarrod said pushing down the panic.

 

"Audra, please check the water closet and the quest rooms, Jarrod check the back stairs, I'm sure he hasn't fallen because we would have heard something, but check any way."  Victoria finished and walked towards Nicks room.

 

"Yes, Mother."  Jarrod and Audra answered.

 

Victoria walked briskly to Nicks room and entered, the sight that greeted her was nothing less than shocking but quickly filled her heart with joy.  Putting her hand to her mouth, she pushed back the tears that threatened to spill down her cheek.  Victoria motioned for Audra, who was just coming down the hall and Jarrod coming from the other direction.

 

The three stood and marveled at the sight, Jarrod cleared his throat and spoke, "Well, would you look at that."  He stated pushing down the lump that had formed.

 

"Oh, that's so sweet."  Audra smiled.

 

"Don't let Nick here you say that."  Jarrod grinned.

 

"Well it is sweet....just look at them."

 

"Mother?" Jarrod said worried at her silence.

 

"I'm fine, dear.  I'm just so.....happy.  My families together."  Victoria place an arm both Jarrod and Audra and drank in the sight before her.

 

   * * * * * * * *

 

Victoria just stared with amused amazement, the sight of Nick, his hand resting lightly on Heath's forearm, both fast asleep.  The look on Heath's face was that of pure contentment, Nick face was relaxed and at peace.  All the doubts from the previous day had been washed away, with a new day came a wondrous miracle.  Two souls founds each other and formed a bond, strengthened by the love of a family.  Each family member silently thanked God for the two sleeping on the bed, Jarrod thanked him for both Nick and Heath and for giving him the honor of calling them brother.  Victoria wept for the good fortune this family was given and Audra praised those who made it happened.  Though the road ahead was unsure, they all knew that nothing could come between the love of a family, heart to heart, soul to soul, they would battle every foe as one.  No longer divided, they were equal parts of a whole heart.

 

 

 

THE END