Destiny

Chapter 1-7

by Bonnie

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

Synopsis: The road a young man travels in hopes of finding his destiny. Tom Barkley has been deceased for three and a half years, since August 8, 1866. Jarrod is 30 years old, Nick is 25 years old, Heath is 20 years old and Audra is 18 years old. Eugene doesn’t exist.

Chapter 1

**Strawberry California, December, 1869**

The two-room cabin was small. An iron double bed was sitting by the fireplace with a trunk at the foot of the bed. A rocking chair was at the opposite end of the fireplace and a table and four chairs were in the middle of the floor. The old pantry cupboard was on the opposite wall. A ladder beside the pantry cupboard led to the small loft upstairs. A backdoor on the sidewall led to the back of the cabin, where a swing hung from the big oak tree and a water pump was hooked up outside the door.

An older plump woman in her late fifties with graying brown hair was kneeling near the fireplace cooking stew. A young, small, frail woman only 43-years of age with light brown hair and sky blue eyes was lying on the first floor bed. She had tears streaming down her cheeks as she clutched a small photo in her hands and held it protectively to her chest. A cold winter chill could be felt coming through the cracks in the walls.

As the older woman began to fill two bowls with stew and placing them on the table the younger woman began to get up from the bed. “LEAH!” The older woman scolded as she rushed over to hold onto the younger as she stumbled on her way to the table. “You shouldn’t be out of bed!”

“I’m tired of lyin’ down, Rachel, nobody should be resting this much till they’re dead,” Leah replied as Rachel assisted her to a chair at the table.

“Really Leah, you must not talk like that. And you should be saving your strength.”

“For what?”

“To see your son.”

“He doesn’t want to see me. I can’t really blame him. After all I have put him through how could he ever forgive me.”

“You can’t change the past, Leah,” Rachel put her hand on top of her young friend’s, “stop feeling guilty for what you can’t do anything about.”

“No, Rachel, no I can’t change the past. I let my pride hurt my son.” Leah’s hands were shaking as she tried to pick up the spoon. The effort to eat was not working so Rachel moved her chair closer and began to feed her friend.

“Rachel,” Leah growled as her hand pushed away the help, “I am not a child!”

“You’re letting your pride get the best of you again my child!” Rachel looked at her friend sternly, “You are sick and too weak to do this yourself. The reason why you should have stayed in bed.” Her voice softening, “Please Leah, let me help you.”

“I’m sorry Rachel,” Leah relented to her friend as the spoon was raised to her mouth, “It’s just hard.”

“I know, dear, I know.” Rachel decided to change the subject, “The wire I sent Heath should be arriving today or tomorrow which means he’ll be here in two weeks. I should check and see if the apples were ruined by the frost. If not, I believe I’ll surprise our boy with an apple pie when he comes.”

“What if he doesn’t?” Leah asked with tear filled eyes, fearing she wouldn’t see her son one final time before she took her last breath.

“He will, Leah, have faith. Heath loves you, don’t you ever forget that.” Rachel tried to reassure her friend.

**Denver Colorado**

Bringing in the herd from the high country and keeping them calm was not an easy task for the dusty cowboys. The cattle were just as cold, tired, and hungry as they were. The cowboys found themselves using more adrenaline just to keep one step ahead of the irritable cattle while also trying to keep themselves warm against the bitter cold. Coming around the bend with shelter on the horizon had brought heavy sighs of relief for the tired men. Once the cattle were bedded for the winter snowfall the cowboys headed for supper.

Standing in line to clean up followed by hot soup and coffee the cowboys would enjoy a long night of rest as the snow began to fall. As the men around the table were eating dinner Jim Campbell, the owner of the Campbell Ranch entered the building. Saying his hellos and congratulating the men on their hard work he made his way over to a back table. A shy young man 20 years of age with sun kissed blond hair and sky blue eyes was quietly eating his dinner as he listened to the conversation around the table. The meal was interrupted when the young man felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Heath, I need to speak to you for a moment.” Jim Campbell quietly spoke before leading the young man to an area on the side that housed the bunks for the men.

“Jim, is everything all right?”

“No, Heath,” Jim fumbled with the paper in his hand, “This wire came today from your Aunt Rachel. It’s your Mama, son. She’s real sick and your Aunt believes you should come home,” he paused and lowered his voice to a whisper, “before it’s too late.”

Heath Thomson’s face turned white with fear, pain, hurt and regret. His Mama was dying! Jim handed the wire to Heath’s shaking hands realizing the young man was trying to keep his emotions in check. “Heath, why don’t you leave tomorrow by first light. I’ll give your pay early so you’ll have something for the trip. And also a little bonus so you can take the train.”

“I can’t accept…”

“Stop right there, son.” Jim looked at Heath, “Don’t let that stubborn pride of yours get in the way. Your Mama needs you.”

“I’ll pay ya back, sir.” Heath knew fighting Jim was a losing battle, and he did want to see his Mama before she died and if his pride caused him not to see her…well he didn’t want to entertain that feeling.

“Forget about paying me back. I will not accept it so don’t even try it. I give bonuses to all my men at Christmas so this is not charity, son.”

“Yes, sir.”

“How many times do I have to tell you not to call me sir?” Jim chuckled as he put his arm around the young man’s shoulders trying to lighten the mood. It was a small effort that helped change the mood of the worried cowboy as he rewarded his boss with a lop-sided grin.

“May God be with you, son, and remember that you’ll always have a place here. So if you want to come back, your job will be waiting here for you.”

“Thank ya, Jim. I can’t tell ya how much your friendship means to me.”

“No thanks needed, son. You’re a fine young man. Don’t ever let anyone tell you any different. I was very lucky to have you on my Ranch. Now go finish dinner and get some rest. Make sure to see me before you leave tomorrow.”

“I will, Jim, goodnight.” Heath left and returned to the table and he tried to eat his dinner. Jim Campbell watched the young man leave. He had come to love this young man in the short six months he was employed with him. Jim had a sad feeling he would never see him again! Heath Thomson was someone special and for Jim Campbell, who never married or had children, wished this young man could have been his son!

* * * * * * * *

It was Christmas Eve and Strawberry was not in the Christmas Spirit. As Heath, rode through his childhood town he couldn’t help but relive his painful past. He hated this town with a passion. He desperately wanted to leave and when he did pain still followed him. He wondered if maybe the townsfolk were right and that he was cursed as the devil’s child and everything he touched would always cause pain and tragedy for him and those he loved. He shook his head to erase his mind of those thoughts as he headed for the livery stable. After bedding down his horse, Heath began the walk to his Mama’s cabin. He was hoping he wasn’t too late. He wanted to see his Mama again.

“Please, God, don’t let me be too late.” Heath’s heart was pounding and the tears were forming in his eyes. Walking up to the door he hesitated. He hadn’t been home in so long he wasn’t sure what to do. Sighing, Heath knocked and after a few moments Rachel opened the door.

“HEATH!” Rachel put her arms around him and hugged him tightly. “Oh Heath, I’m so glad you came home.” Tears were streaming down her cheeks as she began to sob.

Leah, lying on the bed, opened her eyes and as she saw her son at the foot of the bed tears began to fall. Her son had come home! The Good Lord answered her prayers and allowed her one last time with her son! Rachel finally released Heath from her tight hold and looked up at him. Rachel’s outburst was too much for Heath’s emotions and tears he tried to keep in check were now falling. Heath slowly turned to face his Mama and without a word he went to her.

“Please, sweetheart, sit down.” Heath did as he was instructed and sat on the edge of the bed. Leah’s strength was quickly leaving her and she was unable to sit up. Heath picked her up in his arms and held her close to him.

“Oh Mama!” Heath sobbed as he buried his face in her neck, resting his head on her shoulder. He smelled her scent and he promised himself that he wouldn’t forget the smell of his Mama.

“Shush sweetheart, it’s all right.” Leah mustered up the little strength she had as she enveloped her arms around her son.

Rachel realized that the mother and son who became her family needed to be alone and she quietly excused herself from the small cabin. Walking to her friend Hannah’s home, she would inform her that Heath had come home!

Releasing himself from her embrace Heath took in the frail look of his Mama. Her time was close and he knew it. He received word only one week ago. Jim was right, he realized. He wouldn’t have made it home in time if he didn’t take the train. ‘Thank Ya Jim’ he thought to himself. Taking a small gift out of his breast pocket he handed it to his Mama.

“Merry Christmas, Mama.” Heath gave her the same big childlike smile he always would give when he handed her a present.

Smiling at her son, Leah took the small gift and with her son’s help she unwrapped it. She held in her hands a small wooden cross necklace. “Oh Heath.”

She cried at the beauty of the cross that had the carving of Jesus with a crown of thorns placed on his head. She had over a dozen cross necklaces varying in shapes, sizes and detail safely secured in the trunk at the foot of her bed. They were precious gifts her son made for her. They didn’t have much money and fine gifts from the catalog were not possible for her. But that didn’t matter to her at all. Her son’s precious talents at creating her gifts were far more expensive than any gift the catalog could ever offer.

“I made the cross for ya on the train,” noticing her questioned look he explained, “Jim gave me a Christmas bonus to allow me to take the train home.” Leah realized what Heath had earlier.

“Jim’s a good man.”

“Yes, Mama, he is.”

“Heath, will ya put this necklace on for me?” Leah asked her son as she held the necklace out to him. Gently placing his hands behind her he placed the necklace around her neck. He would never have this honor again! This was the last time he would present his Mama with a gift. This was indeed the best Christmas for Heath Thomson, and one he would forever cherish!

Leah caressed his cheeks and wiped away the tears before Heath crawled up on the bed lying beside his Mama. She drew her son to her chest and rocked him in her arms. Running her hands through his blond hair and rubbing his back, Leah savored what would become one of the last times she would hold her child in her arms. Having her son so close at this time she couldn’t help but remember the day he was born.

**Strawberry California, May 8, 1849**

The labor had lasted nearly 18 hours before it was discovered her baby was a breech. With only her friends Rachel Caulfield and Hannah James present for the delivery she would put her trust and faith in them that they would know how to save her and her son’s life. As Hannah turned the child, Rachel held onto her friend to help give her the support she would need to endure the pain and the final moments of delivery. Whatever pain she had just endured to bring her child into the world was immediately erased the moment she heard his cry.

He was a small child just over six and a half pounds with golden hair and eyes that were as blue as the sky above. The ladies chuckled at the boy’s fair hair but Leah knew it was a sign that her child was indeed a miracle. He was a piece of Heaven sent to her from God himself!

As Hannah placed her son in her arms the crying of the small child immediately stopped. Holding him close to her chest, Rachel helped show her how to help him take the milk she offered from her breast. Taking in the look of her precious son tears streamed down her cheeks and she began to think of his father. She had never been with a man before him. He was her first taste of love. This older man that knew how to treat her like a princess immediately stole her heart.

She had hoped he could have been here. They were to be a family. But that world she had created for her life was crushed the day she learned he already had a family of his own. He had a wife and two sons to call his own. She knew having him was impossible. She felt shame knowing she had been with another woman’s husband. How could she go on living knowing she had created the worst kind of sin? Then to learn that this man had left her in the family way!

A pain filled her broken heart as she wondered how it should have been. How would he feel knowing he had this beautiful precious child to call his son? Would he even claim him as a son? Her son had two brothers, would they be brothers to her son? How would his wife feel about her husband having a son from someone other than her? She tried to clear her mind of all thoughts related to him. He was gone. In all reality he never was hers to begin with. He had his own family and they weren’t part of it. She would raise her son alone and he would never know the truth about his son. He would have his family and she would have her precious son!

* * * * * * * *

It had been two days since her son had come home. Her time had now come. “Mama?” Heath sat on the bed holding a cup of warm tea.

“Hello sweetheart.” She smiled up at her precious child as he helped her take a drink of the warm liquid. She had lost all her strength and couldn’t even reach up to touch her son. But he knew this and drew himself closer to her and he caressed her cheek knowing she would want to feel his touch, and he wanted to feel hers. This was so hard. How do you say goodbye?

“Sweetheart, we have to talk about your father.”

“No, Mama! I want the last time we have to be special. I don’t want it to be about him!”

“Heath!” Her tone was one that told him she was not to be denied so he did not protest. “Please get my Bible.”

Knowing she held strength from the word of God he thought for a second maybe she had agreed not to approach the subject of that man! Grabbing her Bible he started to hand it to her. “No ya keep it, I want ya to have it. Heath, I’m sorry. I was wrong to keep ya from your father. Ya should’ve known him and he should’ve known ya.”

“Mama, it’s all right.”

“No, Heath, it’s not all right! I didn’t tell ya cause of my pride. I let ya suffer,” he tried to interrupt but she pleaded with him through her eyes. “I need to say this, Heath. I’m sorry it’s now and maybe it’s the coward’s way out. But I have to say this. I know me not telling ya is what made ya stay away from here.”

“No Mama that’s not why I stayed away. This town hated us. They were cruel to us. I couldn’t stay here. I had to get away. And Uncle Matt, I just couldn’t be near him anymore.” Tears streamed down his cheeks as he begged for her forgiveness, “I’m sorry ya thought that it was you Mama. After the war…” he paused as he choked back a sob, “after the war I became messed up. I didn’t want to live anymore, I wanted to die,” he heard her gasp at his words. “I was runnin’ away. Runnin’ away from life.”

“Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry. If only…”

“No if only Mama,” He smiled at her, “I love ya.”

“I love ya too. But ya needed your father. Ya needed a man you could have looked up to. Ya have a family, Heath, a real family with two brothers and a sister. I’m sorry I kept ya from them!”

“Mama?”

“The Bible, Heath, open it up to the back. You’ll find the answers you have been looking for, the answers to life’s questions, Heath. Please forgive me! Open it, Heath.”

He looked down at the Bible in his trembling hands and slowly opened to the back as his Mama requested. There was a newspaper article on a funeral announcement for one Thomas Barkley! He looked at his Mama to ask her if this was his father when he saw that she was gone…

Chapter 2

The funeral was small with only three people in attendance. The cross for the headstone was made of old wood found in the livery stable. Rachel Caulfield, Hannah James and Heath Thomson stood in front of Leah Thomson’s grave.

Leah Margaret Thomson

Beloved Mother and Friend

July 1826 – December 1869

Heath stood in the middle of the two women who became his family not by blood but by love. Standing in front of his Mama’s final resting-place in the town cemetery tears streamed down his cheeks. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye but he knew he had no choice.

Rachel cited the Psalm 23 verse while Hannah sang “Amazing Grace”. Before leaving the grave behind, the three in attendance simultaneously cited a prayer that was taught to Leah from her mother that was passed down to each generation.

“May the road rise up to meet you,
May the wind be ever at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
May the rains fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May the Good Lord hold you in the hollow of his hand.
Amen.”

Rachel and Hannah gave Heath some time to be alone and he knelt down on his knees. “I’m sorry, Mama. I’m sorry for all the pain I have caused ya. I was lucky to have ya in my life. I’ll never forget ya and I’ll never forget what ya taught me. I’ll try to live my life in a way that’ll make ya proud. I’ll miss ya. I hope Heaven is as beautiful as ya always imagined. I hope you’re happy.” Heath sobbed uncontrollably as he rocked back and forth burying his face in his hands.

Rachel and Hannah clung to each other as their hearts broke for this young man they came to love so dearly. They wished they knew how to heal his broken heart. The ladies returned to the cabin and allowed their Heath to be alone.

Close to half an hour after crying his heart out Heath curled up near her grave and fell asleep. He was awakened by something wet on his face. As he opened his eyes to the sun shining down on him he forgot for a moment where he was until he saw his Mama’s grave, then he remembered. Feeling something wet again on his face he looked up to see a shadow of someone standing over him. It was his Uncle Matt holding a whiskey bottle in his hand. Before he could react his Uncle’s boot made contact with his head causing the world to spin around him!

“Well I see the bastard has come home!” Matt Simmons snarled at his nephew.

“What are ya doin’ here?” Heath couldn’t help but see the man who always brought out that frightened child in him. No matter how much Heath tried to fight it and be strong his Uncle held a mental control over him. At 20 years of age Heath still felt as if he was a frightened six-year-old in the presence of his Uncle.

“I see ya still have bad manners, bastard, ya didn’t even invite me to my own sister’s funeral!”

“Ya hated her so why would ya want to come?” A swift kick of a boot met with Heath’s ribs as he scurried up to protect himself from his Uncle’s attack.

“Like I said, ya still have bad manners!” Matt flashed an evil grin. Heath could quickly tell his Uncle was yet again drunk. “She never should’ve kept ya. Ya ruined her life, bastard! Ya ruined MY life!”

“No ya ruined your own life from not being able to stay away from the bottle.” He knew very well he was enticing his Uncle, but his Mama had just died and this was her resting-place. How dare he come here and disgrace her memory this way! The back of Matt’s hand forcefully connected with Heath’s face sending him falling on his side and rendering a bloody nose. The already pounding head now was wheeling with dizziness.

“Ya pathetic bastard! Ya should’ve died a long time ago and saved us all the misery of having ya around!” As Matt’s hand yet again tried to make contact Heath’s leg kicked Matt’s legs out from under him sending him crashing to the ground. Heath tried to get up and leave before his Uncle regained his composure. The dizziness in his head caused him to stumble giving Matt Simmons the leverage he needed and like many times before he leashed his full drunken fury on his nephew. “YOU BASTARD!”

Matt Simmons was a lethal piece of flesh that had no humane thought in his mind. He was worse when he was drunk! For Heath learned at a young age that Matt Simmons would become one of two men he would fear most in his life. Receiving whippings, beatings, and constant rounds of verbal abuse from his Uncle, Heath never had any peace in Strawberry. When it wasn’t the townsfolk causing him pain and grief, it was his Uncle.

Matt Simmons was drunk today, an occurrence that became more frequent in recent years. Matt knew he struck fear into his nephew and for the drunk who felt more like a man when he was standing over a fear-stricken young boy, he took great pleasure in beating his bastard nephew. His life had no promise. He was married to an equally wicked woman named Martha. Martha seemed to be the one who wore the pants in the marriage, a joke the townsfolk would have at Matt’s expense. When Matt would hear the jokes he would turn his anger on the person he knew he elicited fear from, Heath. When the dreams of a successful hotel were crushed Matt would turn his anger on the person he knew he elicited fear from, Heath. When he would drown his sorrows over his ruined life in alcohol Matt would turn his anger on the person he knew he elicited fear from, Heath. When the town would demean him for having a bastard nephew he would turn his anger on the cause of it, his sister Leah.

The town of Strawberry had died out when the mine closed down. Slowly, with each passing day families were packing up and moving away. The once booming mining town was now deserted and a true ghost town. Matt and Martha Simmons remained in Strawberry afraid to leave and start anew. There was nothing left for Matt Simmons anymore.

Matt Simmons could have had it all! He could have received the undying love of a precious innocent child. He could have had a young boy looking up to him as a hero. He could have received a loving family with his little sister Leah and her young son Heath! He could have had it all. But Matt Simmons chose to throw it all away! The child that could have worshipped him instead feared him. The sister that could have adored him instead feared him. He could have had it all, but instead Matt Simmons chose to have nothing!

Heath tried to protect himself from the blows but with each one he received he became weaker and weaker. He was already suffering from a broken heart as he mourned the loss of his Mama. He was now suffering from so much more that was broken. Standing over his bruised and battered nephew, Matt Simmons snarled in disgust at the person he blamed for his present living conditions. Taking the whiskey bottle and with as much force he could muster he broke the bottle across the bastard’s head rendering him unconscious.

“Do us all a favor, bastard, and die this time!” Matt Simmons began to walk away when he stopped and stared at his sister’s grave. “Rot in hell Bitch!” Matt threw the broken whiskey bottle at the headstone shattering it into pieces as alcohol stained the cross, then Matt staggered away from the family that could have been so much more and returned to the wife he despised.

With dinner ready, Rachel took a walk to Leah’s grave to inform her beloved nephew that he should eat something. As she walked closer to the grave she saw Matt walking away and Heath lying on the ground.

“Oh no! Oh not today! Hannah! Hannah, come quick!” Hannah came rushing out of the cabin and as Rachel met her friend half way the two friends turned and ran towards the grave.

“Oh my boy, what’d that evil man do to ya?” Hannah cried as she and Rachel knelt down near Heath. His blond hair was now red with blood from the open head wound. The bruised and battered face made him nearly unrecognizable. He had multiple broken ribs. He was unconscious and a fever was quickly rising.

“Hannah, stay with him! I’m going to get the wagon so we can take him to Pikeston to see Doctor Jones.” Hannah cradled Heath in her arms humming a gospel tune as Rachel turned and ran towards the livery stable. She prayed she would not have to bury another family member so soon!

* * * * * * * *

The ride to Pikeston was slow and painful for the ladies. Heath had woken up and began to cry out in pain. His head was cradled on Hannah’s lap in the back of the wagon as Rachel drove the team. Reaching Pikeston, the ladies were as drained as their beloved Heath. Jumping down from the wagon, Rachel pounded on the Doctors door. “DOCTOR!”

Doctor Jones opened up the door and was quickly summoned to the wagon. “Oh my,” was the Doctor’s only words upon seeing Heath. He had administered to Heath many times after a run-in with Matt Simmons. He needed no explanation of what he saw. “Jimmy!” The Doctor called to the young boy that was just seconds earlier a patient of his, “Go get Peter from the general store and hurry!” Jimmy quickly did as instructed and Peter came rushing from the store across the street with the little boy behind him. Peter helped the Doctor carry Heath inside so he could be examined.

Two hours after arriving in Pikeston the Doctor gave Rachel and Hannah an update. “Well I don’t have to tell you the severity of his injuries. We will need to monitor him for the next twenty-four hours.” Doctor Jones paused, “Heath is in good hands if you want to return to Strawberry and be near Leah.”

“Thanks Doctor, but that won’t be necessary. We buried Leah today.” Rachel spoke with tears in her eyes.

“Oh dear Lord!” The Doctor was stunned, “I knew the time was near but…I’m very sorry.”

“Thank you. Can we see Heath now? We would prefer not to leave him.”

”Why don’t you go over and have Mary get you something to eat and a place to rest. Heath is resting now and I suggest you do the same. We have a long road ahead of us and we need to take shifts.” After much convincing the ladies did as requested and after seeing Heath for a second they left to see the Doctor’s wife.

* * * * * * * *

The three weeks following the attack were a trying time for everyone. The head wound caused Heath to lose a lot of blood and there were many times it was feared he would not survive. The fever raging his body caused him to suffer nightmares. And as if that wasn’t enough the infection in Heath’s body made him an easy target to illnesses and pneumonia had quickly set in. Rachel and Hannah stayed constantly by his side whispering words of love in his ear. Heath was slowly recovering from his injuries. His head had stitches and was covered with a white bandage. His ribs were bound to help them heal. The cuts and swelling on his face were slowly beginning to disappear.

“Hello sweetheart,” Rachel smiled when she saw the blue eyes open and he looked around the room. “How are you feeling?”

“Like my head is about to fall off, Aunt Rachel.” Heath tried to cover his eyes from the light coming through the curtains in the window, increasing the pain in his head.

Rachel ran her hands through his bandaged hair and kissed his forehead. “The Doctor was afraid to give you headache powder because of the head injury. I know it hurts, sweetheart, but try to close your eyes and rest, all right?”

Rachel went over to the washbasin and wet the cloth. The contact of the cool cloth on his fevered face helped offer some relief for the young man. Rachel folded the cloth and placed it over his eyes giving Heath shelter from the bright sun’s attack on his pounding head.

“Mama’s dead, Aunt Rachel,” Heath’s whisper was filled with a pained realization.

“Yes, sweetheart, she is.”

“I was hopin’ it was all a dream and that she was still alive.”

“She’s in Heaven now, Heath. She’ll never be in pain or be unhappy ever again. You have to remember that. She’s safe now.”

Heath smiled and reached for his Aunt’s hand. “I know Aunt Rachel, but it doesn’t help make me miss her any less. I failed her as a son.”

“You never failed her, Heath Morgan Thomson!”

“Yes I did. She thought I stayed away cause of her. I wanted her to come with me, Aunt Rachel. I wanted ya all to come and start a new life away from here, but ya wouldn’t leave and I couldn’t stay.”

“I know Heath. Nobody blamed you for leaving.” Rachel had tears in her eyes, “please just get some rest. You need to get back your strength so you can be well again. Won’t you be going back to the Campbell Ranch once you are able?”

“I don’t know, Aunt Rachel. I feel like I don’t belong anywhere. I feel so lost.”

“Well after you get better, Heath, we’ll have a long talk. I have a feeling I know how to help you find yourself. Now this is the last time I’m going to tell you, young man, get some sleep.”

Heath gave a small chuckle and did as his Aunt told him and allowed sleep to come. Rachel sat on the stool beside her nephew’s bed holding his hand for a long time after he fell asleep. Rachel was thinking of how she would tell her nephew about his family. His Father’s Family! Rachel prayed she would be doing the right thing. He had suffered so much already and she didn’t want to be responsible for more pain.

Chapter 3

It had been over seven weeks since Matt Simmons attacked Heath. Physically the wounds were healed but mentally Heath was still suffering from the loss of his Mama. Heath remained in Strawberry fixing up both Rachel and Hannah’s cabins. After the cold winter months and the heavy rains, both cabins were suffering from severe weather damage. Heath hadn’t remained this long in Strawberry since before he left town to join the war at age fourteen. Rachel and Hannah strong-armed Heath into remaining in town until he was fully recovered from the beating. But they were also worried about his refusal to come to terms with Leah’s death. Matt and Martha Simmons knew Heath had returned from Pikeston but neither showed their faces in front of Heath, an act he was grateful for.

On this cool afternoon of this third week of February, Heath was working on Rachel’s roof repairing rotten boards. “Heath?” Heath stopped working when he heard his name being called.

“Yeah, Aunt Rachel?”

“It’s Lunchtime. Why don’t you take a break and eat?”

“I’m comin’,” Heath climbed down the ladder and went over to the water pump and began to wash up before entering the cabin.

“Boy Howdy, Aunt Rachel, is that an apple pie I smell?” Heath smiled when he entered the cabin through the backdoor and gave a kiss to both Rachel and Hannah.

“It’s a small thank you for the repairs you’ve been doing,” Rachel smiled as Heath kissed her. Heath sat down at the table with fixings of soup and bread prepared for their meal. Heath began to tear off a piece of nice warm bread when he felt a smack on his hand.

“Heath Thomson! We say grace ‘fore we eat,” Hannah scolded while pointing her finger at Heath. Heath smiled and took the lady’s hand and kissed the top of it.

“I’m sorry, Aunt Hannah.” Heath winked and flashed his lop-sided grin at Hannah, who in return blushed and swatted him.

“Oh stop that.”

Heath chuckled and winked at Rachel, who giggled. “If you are finished teasing Hannah, why don’t you say grace?” Rachel’s giggle turned to laughter at Heath’s groan.

“Dear Lord, thank you for this food you have supplied, in Jesus name we pray, Amen.” After the prayer was spoken, everyone began eating the food.

“How’s the roof coming?” Rachel asked while she passed around the bread.

“I should be done with it this afternoon. I think that clears up most of the repairs on both cabins. I’ll then chop some wood for the both of ya so you’ll have a large supply of it available.”

“So you’ll be leaving soon, then?”

“Yeah,” Heath kept his eyes on his food and refused to look up, “I can’t stay here. I have to leave.”

“We know.”

“Ya could come with me?” Rachel didn’t miss Heath’s hopeful tone.

“We’ve been over this Heath. This town is all Hannah and I know. We need a place to call home. We can’t travel around like you, we need roots.”

“If ya came with me we could find a place to settle.”

Rachel smiled as she put her hand under Heath’s chin and made him look at her. “Would you be doing it for us or for you? You need to find your place in this world Heath and you wouldn’t be doing that if you felt forced to settle someplace because of me and Hannah.”

* * * * * * * *

After supper later that evening Heath walked Hannah to her home and made sure she was settled in her cabin and the door was securely locked before heading back to Rachel’s. Walking into the cabin, Rachel was sitting in the rocking chair sewing one of Heath’s shirts. Heath sat down on the base of the fireplace and held onto Leah’s Bible.

Opening the Bible to the back Heath pulled out the funeral announcement of Thomas Barkley. He had stared at this photo numerous times since his return to Strawberry. He tried to see if he could find a resemblance to the older man. He couldn’t find one. Rachel watched what became a nightly ritual for Heath. She wanted to wait until he was fully recovered before approaching this subject. She didn’t want to have his upset cause any damage to his injuries. She now realized she couldn’t put this off any longer.

“Heath, when we were in Pikeston I told you we would have a talk. I think it’s time we have that talk.”

Without looking away from the newspaper article, Heath replied, “About what Aunt Rachel?”

“Tom Barkley.”

“Is he…my father?”

“Yes Heath he is.”

“I can’t see a resemblance to him.”

“When he was younger than he was in that photo you looked more like him.” Rachel paused, “Tom Barkley owned the mine here in Strawberry. He came here on business when he was robbed and beaten. Leah was coming home from working at the Hotel when she found him outside of the saloon unconscious on the ground. He had no money, nothing to say his identity except for his wallet with the name ‘Thomas’ on it, and his clothes were torn and tattered…”

Rachel sighed, “Leah brought him here. She nursed him back to health. When he woke up he had no memory of who he was. Since his wallet had the name ‘Thomas’ on it that is what we called him.”

“He forgot his wife and sons?” Heath’s bitterness displayed his disbelief.

“Yes Heath, he didn’t know he was married and had a family. Your Mama fell in love with him and he fell in love with her. I warned Leah to be careful. She had never been with a man before. She was inexperienced and she was living in a fantasy. She wouldn’t listen to any of my warnings. She was certain Tom was the one she would marry and have a family with.”

“What happened when his memory returned?”

“I was the first to realize his memory was returning. Leah just made excuses for his actions. I confronted him one afternoon and he admitted to me that he remembered everything. His wife was Victoria and they had just suffered the death of their 6-month-old son Charles from the fever. He had two sons who were three and eight. He missed them all terribly and wanted to return to them.”

“So what he had with Mama meant nothin’ to him when he remembered?”

“No. No, Heath, he still loved her. That was the personal struggle he was going through. He found himself in love with two women. He didn’t want to hurt either one but he knew that’s what would happen. I made him tell Leah the truth.”

”What’d she do?”

“She punched him in the jaw,” Rachel chuckled as she remembered her friend’s reaction. “She pretended she didn’t care and that she didn’t love him. She told him to go back home to his wife and sons. He tried to talk to her to apologize but she wouldn’t listen to anything he had to say to her. She didn’t cry in front of him. She waited until he left. He left immediately after he told her. Before he left he told her that if she needed anything to write him. That he never meant to hurt her and that he wanted to repay what he had done to her. After he left she fell onto the bed and cried her heart out.”

“He would’ve done anything?” Heath’s voice was above a whisper as his eyes never left the picture of Tom Barkley. “Does that anything mean a son?”

“He didn’t know about you Heath. Leah never told him about you. Tom wrote her a letter to check up on her, to see how she was doing. She never wrote him back and never once contacted him.”

“BUT WHY?” Heath jumped up onto his feet and began pacing the small cabin. “WHY DIDN’T SHE TELL HIM ABOUT ME? WHY?” Tears were streaming down his cheeks as he clutched the article in his trembling hand, “I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF HE WOULD HAVE LOVED ME. WHY DIDN’T SHE TELL HIM?”

“She was ashamed.”

“Of me?” Heath’s cracked voice was above a whisper.

“NO. SHE WAS NEVER ASHAMED OF YOU HEATH THOMSON. NEVER!” Rachel stood up and clasped tightly to her nephew’s shoulders. “She loved you and she was so proud of you. She was ashamed of herself Heath, never of you.”

“Ashamed of herself? But why?”

“Because she was a virgin who made love to a man out of wedlock who just happened to be a married man, that’s why Heath.”

“But he had amnesia. She didn’t know.”

“But her heart was broken and she was in a situation she never thought she would be in. She was only 22 years old, Heath. She was only two years older than you are right now. She was too young to face such heartache as that was.”

“When he wrote the letter, did she know I was on the way?”

“Yes she knew.”

“Did ya try to make her tell him?”

“I tried Heath, I tried real hard. I thought he had the right to know about you. She couldn’t get over the shame of it all. She thought about his wife and how it would hurt her to know what happened. She didn’t want to go knock on his door and say ‘Hello Tom I’m expecting your child’ she thought it felt cheap. She had more pride in herself than that.”

Heath resumed his pacing of the small cabin and to Rachel he appeared like a caged animal. Unclenching the article from his trembling hand he read part of the announcement out loud in a shaky voice.

“Thomas Barkley, founder of the Barkley Empire in Stockton California was killed by an assassin’s bullet on August 8, 1866. Funeral service for Mr. Barkley will be held Sunday where he will be buried on the Barkley Ranch. All are welcomed to attend the service. Tom Barkley is survived by his wife Victoria, two sons, Jarrod, Attorney at Law age 26, Nick, Foreman of the Barkley Ranch age 21 and daughter Audra age 14.

“Two sons. Two sons.” Heath spun around waving the article in the air, “IT SAYS TWO SONS! JARROD, ATTORNEY AT LAW AGE 26 AND NICK, FOREMAN OF THE BARKLEY RANCH AGE 21! TWO SONS! IT’S A LIE! A LIE! HE HAD THREE SONS! ME! I WAS HIS SON! IT SHOULD SAY HEATH THOMSON HIS BASTARD SON AGE 17!

“Do ya know where I was at age 17? I was wanderin’ the countryside workin’ at whatever job I could get that I hoped would get me killed. I was outta that Army Hospital for 10 months and I was fightin’ demons from Carterson Prison that I couldn’t escape. The war was over for everyone else but it wasn’t over for me, not in my head.”

Heath fell to the floor onto his knees as he rocked back and forth and in a small pained whisper he cried, “If I had a father he would have protected me. I would have been allowed to go to school. I wouldn’t have had to go to work in the mines. I wouldn’t have had to go to bed hungry. He wouldn’t have let Uncle Matt beat me. He wouldn’t have let me go off to war and I wouldn’t have ended up in that Prison.”

Rachel rushed over and knelt down near Heath and enveloped him in her arms. “Would he have loved me, Aunt Rachel? Would my father have loved me? I don’t even know if he would’ve loved me.”

“He would have loved you Heath. He would have loved you. He would have been proud to call you son. I’m sorry Heath. I’m so, so sorry.”

Rachel and Heath remained on the floor holding onto each other for most of the night. Tears flowed between both of them until neither could produce more tears. When it was close to one in the morning both finally went to bed, but neither of them fell asleep. Rachel thought about a hurt boy who desperately needed his father. Heath thought about what it would have been like if he had a father and if that father, Tom Barkley, would have loved him.

* * * * * * * *

It was the first week of March. With repairs to both cabins complete and wood handsomely supplied for both women, Heath realized it was his time to leave Strawberry. He had been in this town too long and it was time to go. Heath wouldn’t talk about the night he learned what happened with Tom Barkley. Rachel tried to talk to him but he would refuse to partake with any conversation she offered. Knowing she had one last chance, Rachel would not be denied her final chance to make Heath listen to her.

Supper was over and like every night Heath walked Hannah to her home and made sure she was safely inside with the lock securely in place before returning to the cabin. When he entered the cabin Rachel was sitting in the rocking chair and Heath went to sit on the base of the fireplace.

“Heath, we need to talk,” Rachel leaned forward and looked at Heath.

“I’m goin’ to bed, night.” Heath stood up and walked to the ladder heading to the loft.

“HEATH MORGAN THOMSON YOU STOP RIGHT THERE!” Rachel stood up from the rocking chair and stared at Heath. Heath froze with his hands holding onto the ladder but he didn’t turn around. “Don’t think you’re too old for me to take a spoon to your backside, young man. I will not tolerate this attitude from you. You were raised better than that. Now you come over here and sit down. NOW!”

Without saying a word Heath turned around and walked back to the fireplace and took his seat. Pulling his knees up to him he folded his arms around his legs and remained in silence. Rachel eased her stance and sat back down in the rocking chair. Both remained in silence for a half-hour with the only sound in the cabin being the crackling of the fireplace.

“Heath, I know you’re angry and upset right now. You’re upset at your Mama for not telling you about your father. But you feel being angry with her is some sort of betrayal because she’s gone. It’s all right to be angry, Heath. You were robbed of not only a father, but of a family. You have two brothers and a sister, Heath. You should have known them like you should have known your father.”

“You have been running from your life since I can remember. You even ran away to the war trying to escape this place. You were always trying to find your destiny, Heath. I don’t think you will ever find that destiny Heath until you find yourself. And I don’t think you will find yourself until you know fully who you are. There is that other side of you Heath that needs to be found. That other side of you Heath is in Stockton.”

Heath stared at Rachel in disbelief, “Stockton?”

“Yes Heath…Stockton. I think you should meet your family Heath.”

“Ya want me to go to Stockton and meet the Barkley’s?”

“I think you should meet them. I don’t think you will be at peace until you do.”

“My peace has to do with a war that is ragin’ in my head. It has nothin’ to do with the Barkley’s.”

“I disagree. They are a part of you Heath and until you come face to face with that part of you then you’ll never be free.”

“What do ya want me to do walk up to the front door and say ‘Howdy, I’m Tom Barkley’s bastard son’?” Heath chuckled, “Boy Howdy, that would get me beat up and tossed in jail for sure. They’re rich, Aunt Rachel. They probably get swindlers comin’ up to them all the time. Think they’ll honestly believe who I am?”

“You’re being sarcastic Heath and this isn’t funny,” Rachel scolded. “I’m not saying go up there and say that. I’m just saying to go there and work as a ranch hand. Get to meet them. Find out who they are. Then play your cards. Either tell them the truth about who you are or walk away.”

“Walk away? I thought ya wanted me to go there and…”

“Go there and see them, Heath. That is all I’m asking you to do. Whether you agree to tell them is up to you. If you tell them who you are then you’ll have to handle the consequences so I can’t tell you that, it wouldn’t be fair. But go as a ranch hand. They will never be any wiser of who you are.”

“I don’t know if I can do that, Aunt Rachel.”

“Why? Is it any better going from one town to the next with no place to call home? At least if you go there you could find what you have been looking for.”

“Ya actually think they’ll accept me.”

“You never know unless you go Heath. If you don’t go you’ll always wonder.”

“They won’t accept me. I’ll be nothin’ but a constant reminder to them that I’m nothin’ more than Tom Barkley’s biggest mistake.”

“That is not true. When they come to know you Heath they’ll love about you what I love about you and what Hannah loves about you.”

“I don’t think so.” Heath looked at his Aunt questionably when her laughter echoed through the cabin. “What’s so funny?”

“You. You sound just like your Mama. This was the same conversation I had with her when I tried to get her to tell Tom Barkley about you. Don’t you see? Your Mama let her pride choose her decision. If she told Tom about you then you wouldn’t always be wondering if your father would’ve loved you if he knew the truth. Just like you’ll always be wondering if your siblings would have loved you if they knew about you. You aren’t giving them a chance, Heath, just like Leah didn’t give Tom a chance.”

* * * * * * * *

The next morning Heath was packed and ready to leave. He hugged both women and kissed them goodbye. “Heath? Are you going to Stockton?”

“Yeah Aunt Rachel, I’m goin’ to Stockton. I don’t know what I’ll find and I don’t know if I’ll tell ‘em, but I’ll go and see ‘em. Like you said, what could it hurt?” Heath flashed his lop-sided grin, “I mean they won’t be any of the wiser so I have the choice to decide what to do. I’ll wire ya when I get there and let ya know of my decision, so don’t worry.”

After mounting his horse, Heath rode out of Strawberry and headed towards Stockton California. He wasn’t sure what he would find but he knew he had to check it out. He had two brothers and a sister! He had to admit it…he was curious about them.

Chapter 4

Heath Thomson arrived at the Barkley Ranch by mid-afternoon on an unexpectedly hot March afternoon. He found himself unknowingly coming into contact with each of his siblings. When Heath decided to race the train on his horse, his oldest brother Jarrod was one of the train passengers taking a bet on the outcome. He met his sister Audra when she came after him with a whip at Tom Barkley’s grave. Only with Heath’s luck would he be crossing a bridge at the same time as his brother Nick. The two shared a not-so-friendly sparring match before the bridge gave away giving both men an unexpected bath. Of course Heath didn’t realize the man was his brother until he rode up to the Barkley Ranch and found out the man he sparred with was Nick, the one who did the hiring. He was certain he wouldn’t get the job because of that little stunt, but little did he know that his other brother would be on his side.

Because of Jarrod winning the bet in the race he encouraged Nick to hire Heath on at the Ranch. Heath went to the bunkhouse and met the Foreman, Duke McCall. The expression the older man gave Heath didn’t go unnoticed. Heath wondered if the man saw a resemblance to Tom Barkley. But he figured he was only paranoid, maybe all newcomers are treated with mistrust he amused.

After getting settled in the bunkhouse, Heath was sent immediately with McCall to head out and begin picking peaches. Heath’s work ethic quickly impressed Nick, McCall and the other ranch hands. While working with the men, Heath wondered if he should approach the issue of the Barkley’s.

“Howdy. I’m Heath Thomson.” Heath held out his hand to the man standing beside him.

“Hello, I’m Mike! Where ya from?” The two men shook hands before returning to their work at hand.

“Strawberry. You?”

“Right here in Stockton.”

“Is Stockton a nice town?”

“Sure is. One of the best, it’s not too big but not too small.”

“Not one that craved the city life then, huh?”

“Oh no. My sister did but not me. I couldn’t live in the city. Ya been to the city?”

“Yeah in Denver Colorado.”

“Never been there. What was it like?”

“Busy. Everyone’s always rushin’ around doing stuff. I like a small town myself. The people are nicer and they ain’t rushin’ ‘round so much.”

“You’ll love Stockton. Everyone here is really nice. Maybe I can show ya around?”

“I’d like that. Ya been working for the Barkley’s long?”

“Ever since I graduated from school. My Pa worked for them too. I love ranching. My dream is to have my own spread some day.”

“Good people then?”

“The best you’ll ever find. I hear stories from the other men ‘bout places they worked and they swear that nobody treats ya better than the Barkley’s.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“Just be careful ‘bout Nick.”

“Why’s that?”

“He has a quick temper on ‘em.” Heath stared at Nick who was working the opposite end of the grove. Nick looked up and made eye contact with him and he quickly looked away. A brother! He couldn’t get used to the idea he had brothers.

Mike and Heath found themselves talking all afternoon while they worked. Heath learned a lot about the Barkley Family and about Stockton. With Mike’s help Heath was able to meet some of the other ranch hands. It was late afternoon when the men arrived back at the Ranch to call it a day. Victoria and Audra Barkley had gone out for an afternoon ride and were coming back when they saw the men returning. They had taken their horses into the barn to bed them down for the night and were busy talking, or actually Audra was busy talking about the latest charity dance she was planning. Heath and Mike came in to take care of the horses that were used for the work that day when they spotted the ladies.

“Hello Mrs. Barkley, Miss Audra” Mike commented as he and Heath tipped their hats to the ladies and smiled. Victoria felt like she was hit in the gut when she saw the young blond man standing in front of her. He was the vision of her husband when they were first married. Seeing him standing in front of her tipping his hat with that half grin was the image of Tom Barkley 30 plus years earlier. After giving a quick nod and a smile she quickly turned and began to finish automatically caring for her horse. Audra was already finished and Victoria told her to go on into the house. She wanted a minute to compose herself.

“Mike, Heath, why don’t you go get cleaned up and get some grub before it’s gone. I’ll take care of the horses.” Duke McCall saw Victoria’s reaction and he wanted to get Heath out of the barn. He saw the same resemblance Victoria had seen with the young blond, but a part of him was hoping he had only imagined what was standing in front of him. He knew now that was only wishful thinking. He had kept his eye on the newcomer throughout the afternoon and periodically he thought he would see a reaction or a trait that made him see his old friend standing there alive as can be. With his own realization and with the reaction seen on Victoria’s face, there was no doubt to Duke McCall. Heath Thomson was indeed the son of Tom Barkley!

“Sure thing, Duke.” Mike smiled as he slapped Heath on the back, “Come on Heath, we better take Duke here up on his offer before he changes his mind.” Mike and Heath both walked out of the barn offering their thanks and headed towards the water trough to clean up and then to the bunkhouse. Heath also saw Victoria’s reaction. He was now beginning to wonder if coming to the Barkley Ranch was a good idea after all. He could feel that she knew who he was. He saw the heartache in her eyes. She was an innocent victim in this, and now he had hurt her. Why hadn’t he thought about what this would do to her by him coming here?

“Victoria, if you like I can finish caring for Misty Girl. Why don’t you go on into the house?” Duke finished with the horses first and made certain his conversation started after the men had left the barn.

“That’s all right Duke. I got her.” Victoria looked at the Foreman who had been with them for nearly 20 years. Duke and Tom were the best of friends and when her husband died, Duke and his wife Hattie were there to help the family through their grief. Duke gave Nick the support and assistance he needed in accepting his father’s death and with running the ranch, while Hattie became Victoria’s confidant and support system after losing her husband. “You saw what I did didn’t you Duke?”

“Yes, Victoria, I saw it.”

“Did he say anything at all? Does he know?”

“Not sure. He came here today to ask for a job and Nick told him to come and get settled in.” Duke paused knowing what his next statement would mean, “His name is Heath Thomson.”

“Thomson.” Victoria rested her hands over Misty Girl’s back, “As in Leah Thomson.”

Duke had become aware of Tom’s affair with Leah Thomson. Upon his return home from Strawberry, Tom confided in McCall and asked his friend how he should handle the situation. Duke quickly informed Tom he should tell Victoria about the affair. Tom did inform Victoria of the affair but never did he inform her of the amnesia and that he had forgotten his family. Feeling that the idea he had forgotten her would only have made it worse for his wife, not to mention appear as an excuse to his actions, he kept that part to himself. Despite the rough road traveled between them, Tom and Victoria’s marriage survived the affair and they had been able to carry on with their lives. But neither ever imagined a child would have been involved. How could they have been so careless? Were they only hoping that a child wouldn’t have been born so they made it so in their minds?

“Duke please don’t tell anybody what you know about Heath. I’ll talk with the family tonight. We need to figure out how to handle this.”

“Yes Victoria.”

Victoria headed for the house, while Duke headed to his house. The Foreman’s home was located near the bunkhouse and was the house Tom had built for him and Victoria when they first arrived at the Ranch over 30 years ago. Duke and Hattie have lived in the Foreman house since their arrival at the Ranch along with their three children. Their oldest son remained in the Army after the War, their daughter currently lives in New York and their youngest son died of diphtheria when he was only a child.

After returning to the house Victoria quickly went to her bedroom and rummaged through her trunk. With mementos from her marriage and her childhood safely tucked away, Victoria searched and found the photo she was looking for…a family photo of Tom, Victoria and Tom’s brother John with the woman who would later become his wife Mary Ellen. The very young Tom Barkley who was only 25 years old in the photo was the mirror image of the young man Victoria had just seen moments earlier.

Victoria was sitting in her wing back chair by the fireplace in her bedroom. The photo was resting on her lap as tears streamed down her face. The crackling of the fireplace was drowned out by her thoughts. She had dealt with her anger and betrayal over Tom’s affair almost 22 years ago. She was not going to relive those feelings again.

Instead Victoria mourned the loss of her son, Charles, who died when he was 6 months old from the fever. The death of baby Charles is what caused Tom to take an extended leave to Strawberry, a business trip that would lead to his affair. Victoria mourned the loss that Tom never knew he had a son and that he wasn’t able to watch him grow into a young man. Victoria mourned for her children who never were able to grow up with this brother. Victoria mourned for this boy, this young man, whose life was certain to have suffered major heartbreak and tragedies.

Why didn’t Leah tell Tom? Why didn’t Tom and Victoria go to Strawberry and make sure a child wasn’t involved? Why? Why? Why? Numerous questions ran through Victoria’s mind, but no answers followed. Victoria needed answers but she wondered if she would ever find them.

A knock came at the door and for a moment it took Victoria awhile to register the intrusion of her thoughts. “Yes?”

“Mrs. Barkley, dinner is ready.”

“Thank you, Silas. I’ll be down in a minute.” Victoria stood up and went over to her vanity. After splashing some water from the washbasin on her face to dry the tearstains she fussed with her hair. Making sure she was presentable Victoria was in actuality only procrastinating her next move. Tonight she would tell her children they had a brother. Tonight she would tell her children of their father’s affair. Tonight she would tell her children news that would break their hearts. Tonight she would tell her children news that would change their lives forever. She was not prepared for what tonight would bring. She was certainly not prepared for what tomorrow would bring.

As Victoria descended the stairs she saw her three children in the parlor. Nick and Jarrod were enjoying a brandy while Audra was reading a book. She could hear they were talking but what they were talking about made her gasp. They were talking about the man who was, unknown to all of them, their brother.

“I tell you Jarrod that boy doesn’t know the word lazy. He and Mike worked harder then anybody else out there. Duke and I were quite pleased.”

“Well I guess an ‘I told you so’ is in order?” Jarrod smirked at a growling Nick while he poured Victoria a brandy and served it to her.

“You don’t have to brag about it. I admitted I was wrong about not wanting to hire the boy. Just because he has a mouth on him doesn’t take away the fact he’s a hard worker. I believe the ranch will benefit from…uh…”

“Heath.” Just as Audra helped her brother, Nick simultaneously said the name at the time his sister had. Audra blushed at the looks her brothers gave her.

“Dinner is served, Mrs. Barkley.”

“Thank you Silas.” Victoria responded as Jarrod took her arm and escorted her to the dining room.

As Nick escorted Audra he looked down at her and growled, “And how do you know his name little missy?”

“I met him earlier…at Father’s grave…and then again in the barn when Mother and I came back from our afternoon ride.”

“He was at Father’s grave?” Jarrod was perplexed and exchanged a look with Nick.

“Oh don’t be so suspicious Jarrod. Father was a well-known man I’m sure he was just curious about him like everyone else is. I was the one who directed him to the ranch to talk to Nick. He asked who did the hiring and I told him it was Nick.”

“I have a feeling there’s more to this story little sister,” Jarrod’s voice took on a fatherly tone and he raised his eyebrows at Audra’s exasperated sigh and the role of her eyes. “What does that mean?”

“Nothing Jarrod. Just forget it.”

“I think our little sister yet again has the eyes for one of our ranch hands.” Nick sighed as he passed the potatoes to Jarrod. Everyone froze with what they were doing when they heard a gasp come at the other end of the table. The look on Victoria’s face was pale white and she looked as though she would faint.

“Mother, are you all right?”

“Fine Jarrod, I’m fine. Just a bit tired is all. Can we please have the rest of our meal in silence? There is no need to be harassing your sister right now.”

“Yes Mother,” Nick and Jarrod responded as they looked at each other and shrugged.

“Thank you Mother.” Audra responded with a smile to Victoria and then turned to glare at her brothers. They always over exaggerated with her and she hated it. Couldn’t they see she was growing up? If they had their way she would remain five years old for the rest of her life. But she was 18 years old and she was no longer a child. They would just have to accept it.

The rest of the meal was eaten in silence and just as everyone started to exit the room Victoria spoke, “I need to speak to all of you. Please let’s go into the library where we can talk. I need to get something upstairs and then I’ll meet you there.”

After entering the library each of Victoria’s children took a seat as they wondered what was going on. Victoria had gone upstairs to retrieve the photo she was looking at before dinner and then returned to the library. Jarrod was sitting behind the desk leaning back in the leather chair smoking a cigar. Nick was sitting in the wing back chair near the fireplace with his legs stretched out in front of him. Victoria came into the room and went over and sat on the sofa near Audra. After a half-hour of silence each of the children became restless.

“Mother?” Jarrod started to speak when Victoria looked at him. The look in her eyes shook him to his very core. The hurt in her eyes was too much for him to bear, but he couldn’t figure out why.

“There is no easy way to say this. So I would like each of you to not say a word until I’m finished. This won’t be easy and I don’t need any interruptions.” After looking around the room at the faces of each of her children, Victoria stared down at the photo in her hands. She couldn’t look into their faces when she told them.

“Before Audra was born and Nick you were only three at the time so I don’t know how much of this you will remember, but Jarrod I’m sure you’ll remember this quite well. I am talking about the year baby Charles died from the fever.”

Jarrod nodded his head and frowned as he remembered those dark days that turned into years after his baby brother died. Nick and Audra heard the story of baby Charles dying but neither were aware of the heartache that filled their home.

“After baby Charles died your father and I had a hard time dealing with his death. We each dealt with the pain in our own way. A time came that your father decided to take a business trip to get away. He went to Strawberry to check up on the mine that he had owned. He was gone for nearly 3 months before coming home. After he returned home he had changed. He was trying to be very pleasing towards me. He was obviously very guilty about something.”

“After some time I finally got him to open up to me about what was bothering him. Duke was aware of what was wrong and had encouraged your father to speak to me.” Victoria paused, “your father had met a woman in Strawberry.”

Victoria sighed and tried to keep her emotions in check. Audra began to rub her Mother’s back in hopes of comforting her. With a shaky hand, Victoria padded Audra’s leg, “Thank you dear.” Audra and Victoria made eye contact as they both smiled at each other. Audra’s smile was filled with compassion and love, which helped give Victoria the strength she needed to continue.

“The woman’s name was Leah Thomson. I don’t know everything that happened between them, your father never told me. The only thing I know is that they did indeed have an affair. After his return home your father sold his shares in the mine and he never returned to Strawberry. Our marriage almost didn’t survive but with love, patience, time and most importantly having each of you around us is what saved our marriage. However your father and I made one very horrible mistake. We never made certain a child wasn’t involved. I found out today there was indeed a child, a child that is your father’s son and your brother.” Victoria paused, “His name is Heath Thomson.”

Chapter 5

“WHAT?” The word echoed by three people filled the library long after it was spoken.

Nick bounced out of his seat and was standing up in a fight stance. His face was filled with every emotion possible. His first reaction was to deny this was possible. Whatever his mother was saying was not true, this had to be a trick.

Jarrod also bounced out of his seat and quickly came around the desk and knelt in front of his mother. He too had the first reaction to deny this was possible. He never in his wildest dreams thought he would hear the words that his father had an affair and that he had this brother.

Audra sat frozen in her place on the sofa near her mother. Tears streaming freely down her face with her left hand covering her mouth. Her father meant the world to her. She was his little girl, his princess. How could he ever betray her mother in such a horrible way?

Victoria knew the reactions of her children would be denial. She knew she would hurt them with these words. She cursed herself for having to break their hearts. But she had no choice. So much had been wronged with this entire situation, that it was now time to make it right.

“Mother, what makes you think that this…Heath…is my…” Jarrod tried to reason with her. He had to find some way to show his mother that she was wrong.

“Brother?” Victoria said the word that Jarrod wasn’t ready to say.

“Yes, Mother. What proof do you have? Do you have any proof?”

“IF THAT BOY CAME UP TO YOU WITH THIS CLAIM I WILL TEAR HIM FROM LIMB TO LIMB!” Nick was infuriated. The first thought that came to him was that this boy made a verbal attack on his mother.

“Nicholas,” Victoria stared at her beloved middle son and her voice was just above a whisper. “Heath never said a word to me. He never had to. I only saw him once and that was in the barn when Audra and I came back from riding.” Everyone could see the far away look in Victoria’s eyes, “The way he walked into the barn tipping his hat and flashing that silly lopsided grin.” Victoria smiled as she saw the vision of her husband but a frown quickly came upon her when she remembered it wasn’t her husband, but his son. His son by another woman!

“I remember when your father and I first married. Oh sure you remember the gray hair and long beard, the bulging belly and the callused hands that was the result of years of hard work. But I remember the man I married. The handsome man with blond hair, blue eyes and that silly lopsided grin of his.”

“Mother, that’s all good and well but just because this boy has blond hair and blue eyes doesn’t make him Father’s….”

“Son?” Victoria yet again said the word that Jarrod couldn’t say.

“Jarrod, for a moment I thought I was 21 years old and we were just starting out here on this ranch. I thought I was imagining everything, that maybe I was just missing your father more than most days. But that is not what’s wrong with me! I am not crazy!”

“I wasn’t trying to say you were, Mother! I’m just trying to understand.”

“Then understand this. Duke also saw what I saw. He too saw your father standing in front of him. After we talked, I went to my room and I found this photo. See you and Nick took after me with the dark hair and the dark complexion. Audra took after her father with the blond hair and the light complexion. This photo will tell you the same thing that it told me. This was taken around the time your father and I were married. We are with your Uncle John and Aunt Mary Ellen. Of course that was before your Uncle married Mary Ellen.”

Victoria took the photo and turned it over showing it to her children. The only response was the gasps echoed by her children.

“Mother! That looks like Heath!” Audra cried out as her tear filled eyes became transfixed on the photo of her parents.

“Oh…My…God…” Jarrod stammered as he stood up and began to pace the room.

Nick’s jaw dropped open and he ran his hands over his eyes and then stared back at the photo hoping what he saw was only imagined. It wasn’t! Like Jarrod, Nick began pacing the library.

“I’m truly sorry to have done this to all of you. I never intended for you to know what happened. But your father and I were careless in never realizing a child was involved. Right now that is what’s important. Heath Thomson is your brother. Your father should have known about him. You should have known about him.”

Victoria stopped and wiped the tears from her eyes. How could all this be happening?

* * * * * * * *

While the family was learning about the addition of the new Barkley family member Heath Thomson was also trying to figure out what to do. His intention was to come to the ranch and meet his siblings. Get to know them while working as a ranch hand. He needed time to realize how to handle all of this. Would he tell them? Would he not tell them? He had no idea what he would decide.

Getting to know them first was as far as he had decided. Maybe after getting to know them he would not want to hurt them with the knowledge he existed. But seeing the house, the ranch and how they lived Heath couldn’t help but be a little jealous. He was envious that they had so much while he had so little. He went to bed hungry when they went to bed with full stomachs. They had an education and he did not. Their childhood was spent playing games and going to school while his childhood was spent working in the mine of Strawberry all day long. He even had to get a second job to help support him and his Mama. But most importantly he was envious that they had a father and he did not.

But with all the thoughts Heath had of his two brothers and sister, he was ashamed to realize he never thought of Victoria Barkley. How could he be so heartless? He read the newspaper article and knew that Tom Barkley was married. How would she feel knowing her husband betrayed her? How would she feel knowing her husband sired a son from someone other than her? He now understood why his Mama never told Tom Barkley about his existence. Sure Heath was upset that Tom Barkley didn’t know the truth but he understood why. That shame and guilt his Mama must have felt was now stirring in his gut.

His Aunt Rachel said he shared a resemblance to Tom Barkley when the man was much younger. Victoria Barkley must have seen that resemblance in the barn. Maybe she was only startled into thinking she saw a younger version of her husband. Maybe it wasn’t too late to fix this disastrous plan after all! If he left the ranch tonight then she would forget. She would forget what she saw in the barn and carry on with her life. His siblings would never learn the truth and Tom Barkley’s widow would be spared the heartache of knowing of his existence.

No matter what he had planned when he arrived at the ranch those plans were now changed. He had to think of Victoria Barkley. He also had to think of his siblings. They would be crushed to learn about him. They probably adored their father and to learn that he had a bastard son. No he wouldn’t do that to them. He would leave and they would never know. Their lives would carry on like nothing happened because Heath Thomson would leave the Barkley Ranch…tonight!

Getting up from his bed, Heath was grateful he had the bottom bunk so he wouldn’t wake the men. After putting on his pants, he put on his shirt over his long underwear. He didn’t bother to button his shirt because he would do that later. Time was of the essence! Heath grabbed his saddlebags that were stored in the trunk at the foot of his bed and held his breath as the creaking of the lid was opened and then closed. Carrying his saddlebags in one hand and his boots in the other Heath slowly padded his way out of the bunkhouse. Once outside Heath heaved a heavy sigh that he didn’t wake any of the men. Putting on his boots, Heath ran to the barn to saddle his horse.

“Come on Gal, plans have changed.” Heath whispered to his horse as he quickly saddled her.

* * * * * * * *

Duke and Hattie McCall were also having a long night. Duke shared with his wife the news about Heath, knowing Victoria would need the support his wife would offer. Duke and Hattie were sitting at the kitchen table drinking their coffee as they talked. The table sat in front of the window in their small kitchen and so when Heath walked his horse out of the barn and towards the road, it was Hattie that saw him first.

“Duke, someone’s leaving.” Hattie tapped Duke’s arm to get his attention. Duke looked out the window and quickly recognized the man as Heath.

“That’s Heath. He’s leaving.”

“He knew! He knew that Tom was his father! His coming here wasn’t an accident. But why is he leaving?”

“I think he saw the same look I did from Victoria’s eyes. I don’t think the boy fully realized what his coming here would do. He probably found out Tom was his father and came here to check it out. But I don’t think he ever expected anyone would know.”

“How sad.” Hattie kept her eyes glued to the lone figure that walked far enough away from the house for the hooves not to wake anyone. Once far enough away he jumped on his horse with one fluid motion and the horse flew out of site.

“Duke, what are we going to do? Should we tell Victoria?”

“I think I better,” Duke stood up from the chair and walked out the door. Walking up to the door of the white house Duke quietly knocked.

“Hello Mr. McCall,” Silas greeted as he opened the door.

“Hello Silas. I’m sorry to be here so late, but I need to speak with Victoria.”

“Sure Mr. McCall,” Silas walked out of the foyer and to the library knocking on the door.

Jarrod opened the door of the library and saw Silas standing there. “Mr. Jarrod, Mr. McCall is here to see Mrs. Barkley.”

“Thank you Silas,” Jarrod turned to look at his mother, a reaction that was repeated by her other children.

“I better go see what he wants. Wait here.” Victoria walked out of the library closing the door behind her.

“What could that be about?” Nick asked the question everyone had wanted to know.

* * * * * * * *

“Hello Duke,” Victoria greeted her old friend. “Is something wrong?”

“Victoria, I thought you would want to know that Heath just left the ranch.”

“What?” Victoria’s hands went to her mouth, “But why?”

“I don’t know. I saw him leave the barn. He was walking his horse till he got far enough from the ranch so he wouldn’t wake anyone.”

“He’s leaving! Dear God, no, he’s leaving!”

“Victoria?” Duke wasn’t sure what to do.

“Duke please do me a favor and saddle Misty Girl for me. I feel like taking a late ride.”

“Are you sure?”

“Very sure.”

“All right,” Duke knew when Victoria had her mind made up he couldn’t argue with her.

While Duke went to saddle Misty Girl, Victoria returned to the library and to her anxious children.

“He’s left the ranch.” Victoria stood at the doorway. “Heath left. I’m going after him.”

“MOTHER!” All three of her children ran to her side and all of them were talking at once.

“SILENCE!” Victoria raised her hands to stop her children from talking. “I don’t want to hear another word. I must talk to him. Whether he comes back or not, I must try.”

“Mother, with all due respect, we don’t know this boy. And you are going to go riding God knows where to bring him back!”

“Nicholas I am not Audra! I am 52 years old and am a grown woman! I have been in worse situations then this. Not to mention this boy is your brother and your father’s son! His destiny has been robbed from him for far too many years. I don’t think I have to tell you what life he must have led. A life that should have been lived here! I will go talk to him and see if I can reason with him. He probably realized I recognized him and it frightened him off.” With that Victoria turned on her heels and headed for the foyer with her children following close behind.

“I’ll be back when I can the rest of you go to sleep and think about what I have told you. Tomorrow when you’ve had time to think…and if Heath comes back…we’ll discuss how to handle this.”

“Mother, maybe Nick and I should go with you,” Jarrod tried to reason with his mother.

“Jarrod, did you hear anything I just told your brother? I will not have you and Nicholas coming with me and possibly intimidating that poor boy anymore than he already is.” Victoria opened the door and turned once more to look at her children.

“I love you and I’ll be careful. Goodnight.” Victoria mounted Misty Girl and rode off with her children standing in the doorway watching her.

“Come on Jarrod. We’ll follow her,” Nick slapped Jarrod on the back. When Jarrod looked at him hesitantly Nick sighed, “She won’t know we’re there, but we’ll be there if she needs us. Now are you coming or do I go alone?” Nick didn’t wait for Jarrod’s answer he just started walking towards the barn. It didn’t take Jarrod long to decide he would follow. Nick was right, they would be there if she needed them but they would be out of the way as Victoria requested.

* * * * * * * *

Heath stopped to camp on the edge of the woods outside of Stockton. Dismounting from his horse Heath cared for her needs before caring for his own. Once his horse was cared for, Heath started a fire and unrolled his bedroll.

Heath sat on a log roll near by and pulled out his pouch to roll a cigarette. Once that was complete he pulled out his Mama’s picture and stared into her beautiful eyes. The photo was of Leah, when she was young and beautiful, before the cancer robbed her body of its lively soul. In the photo Leah was holding young Heath on her lap. The little tow-headed boy with a missing front tooth who had golden hair and blue eyes like his Mama stared back at him. Looking at that little boy Heath couldn’t help but think about each of his siblings and what it would have been like growing up with them.

As he thought about his siblings a noise caught his attention. Like a flash of lightning he bounded up on his feet and had his gun drawn towards the figure in the shadow. Out of the shadows walked a small petite woman with gray hair and her hands held up high. Heath recognized the woman as Victoria Barkley. Heath stood frozen in place as he wondered if he was only imagining her.

“I am unarmed Mr. Thomson and I would feel much safer if you put that gun away.”

Victoria saw a look of shocked horror grace the face of the young blond as the realization he had a gun drawn on her became clear.

“Oh…I’m so sorry Ma’am,” Heath quickly returned the gun to its holster and out of the corner of his eye he saw a hand reach out towards him.

“Heath Thomson, I am Victoria Barkley,” Victoria smiled.

Without saying a word and after a moment of hesitation, Heath slowly reached up his hand and returned the handshake. As their hands clasped together in a firm shake Heath felt a trembling sensation run through his entire body. This woman reminded him of somebody he knew!

Chapter 6

Nick and Jarrod watched from the bushes the meeting between their mother and Heath Thomson. Their eyes widened at the sharp reflexes of the young man when he drew his gun aiming it towards the shadow approaching him. Jarrod held Nick back, who was ready to pounce, and both brothers relaxed when they saw the shock in the young man’s face as he returned the gun to the holster.

* * * * * * * *

Heath offered Victoria a seat on the log and he sat beside her. “I’m sorry Mrs. Barkley, I never meant for all of this to happen.”

“What did you expect?”

“I thought I could come to the ranch and see everybody. I didn’t decide yet what to do after that.”

“So what made you leave?”

“Seeing ya in the barn. I saw the pain in your eyes. That’s when I realized it was a mistake to come here.”

“I knew about Leah, Heath.” Victoria saw the shocked look in the eyes of the young blond.

“Ya knew? He told ya?”

“He told me. I don’t know the specifics just that he met Leah in Strawberry and that they had a…brief…relationship.”

“That’s all he said?”

“Yes but its not like I wanted to know more.”

There was silence between them for some time before Victoria’s eye caught the photo in Heath’s hand. “Is that your Mother, Heath?”

“Uh…yes.”

“May I see the picture?”

Heath handed the photo to Victoria and she was shocked to see a woman who shared a resemblance to her. She also saw the little tow-headed boy and she felt a pain in her gut at the lost time between father and son.

“She’s very pretty, Heath.” Victoria grinned, “And you look adorable.”

“Uh thank ya Ma’am.” Heath blushed at the compliment and Victoria smiled at how easy it was for him to blush.

“I would like you to come back to the ranch Heath.” Victoria handed the photo back to Heath and stared at him. “You’re Tom Barkley’s son and you deserve the same rights as all of his children.”

“I can’t go back Mrs. Barkley. I don’t want to hurt your children. They can never know about me.”

“That’s a little too late, Heath. They already know about you. I told them tonight.”

“Ya told them?” Heath stood up and began to pace around the little campfire. “This wasn’t supposed to happen like this. They weren’t supposed to know about me.”

“Heath, listen to me! They have the right to get to know you. You have the right to get to know them.”

“No!”

“It’s not fair of you to make this decision alone, Heath! Don’t your brothers and sister have the right to share in this decision?”

”Why would they wanna get to know me?”

“Because you’re their brother!”

“I’m Tom Barkley’s biggest mistake. I’ll be nothin’ but a reminder to them that their father was unfaithful to ya.”

“That is untrue Heath!” Victoria stood near Heath and held onto both of his shoulders and made him look at her. “Heath, think about it tonight and decide whether or not to come to the ranch tomorrow. You’re welcomed if you decide to come by. If you decide not to come then I want you to know one thing. We’ll never forget you, Heath. You’re part of this family and if you ever want to come back after giving it some time then you’re always welcomed.”

Victoria turned to leave and mount her horse when she stopped and looked back at him. “We’re your family Heath. I hope you’ll give us a chance to be your family. I won’t promise that it’ll be easy because family is never easy. But, I will promise you this…the rewards to having a family outweigh any pain that may come with having one.”

“Goodnight Heath. I hope to see you tomorrow, and if I don’t then take care of yourself.”

Victoria left Heath standing alone in the middle of his campsite with only his thoughts to occupy his time.

After mounting her horse and riding away, Victoria rode near Jarrod and Nick’s horses and she saw the shock in their eyes at her presence.

“I should’ve known you would’ve come no matter what I said. Well I guess I don’t have to explain what happened considering you heard everything. Let’s go on home.”

Nick and Jarrod shared a look and then mounted their horses and rode with their mother back to the ranch in silence. After returning to the ranch and bedding their horses for the night the three Barkley’s walked into the house and were greeted by Audra.

“Did everything go all right? Is Heath with you?” Realizing Heath wasn’t with them Audra looked at her mother, “Where is he?”

“Calm down, sweetheart! I see nobody listened to me before I left,” Victoria smiled. “Heath has a lot to think about just like we do. I invited him back to the ranch tomorrow so we can all talk this through. I don’t know if he will or won’t come. Right now there isn’t anything any of us can do about it.”

“So I suggest we all just get some sleep and we’ll deal with tomorrow when it comes.” Victoria received a kiss and a hug from each of her children and as she began to walk up the staircase she stopped and stared at her children.

“I want to tell you how proud I am of each and every one of you. I know that tonight you learned news that you never thought you would ever hear. I am sorry I had to hurt all of you with this information. But I want to say that the way you’re handling this makes me proud.”

“I realize this will be difficult for all of you no matter what happens tomorrow. And if Heath does come tomorrow and if he does stay here at the ranch then the adjustment will be a major one for all of us. It’s all right to be angry with your father. It’s all right for you to be confused; hurt and unsure of how this all should go. Those emotions are understandable and I would be more concerned if you didn’t feel them. So don’t feel that your feelings are wrong or you should feel something else.”

“I love you…very much. Goodnight,” Victoria turned back around and walked up the stairs and to her bedroom.

Jarrod and Nick each gave Audra a big bear hug, holding onto her longer than usual, followed by a kiss telling her goodnight before she retired to her bedroom for the evening. Jarrod and Nick knew going to bed wasn’t an option for them right now, as they both needed to unwind. Both brothers walked into the game room and poured themselves a glass of brandy. Nick began playing with the balls on the pool table while Jarrod stood near by swishing the liquid back and forth in his glass.

“He didn’t want us to know about him.” Nick broke the silence in the room keeping his eyes on the balls as he pushed them back and forth in his hands.

“I was shocked to find out father had an affair. But to learn we have a brother. I don’t even know how I feel about this. But I can’t imagine what it must be like for him right now.”

“Me neither,” Nick pushed one of the balls hard against the base and it bounced and rolled across the pool table. Nick turned away and began pacing the room. “I always wanted a little brother. But I never thought I would get one like this. Pappy, I don’t know how to take this. Part of me wants to get to know him,” he paused, “but a part of me doesn’t want him here.” Nick stopped his pacing and stared at his brother looking him in the eye hoping to find comfort.

“I feel the same way Brother Nick. I think it’s a normal reaction for us to feel this way. I mean if Heath does come back and he stays here then the scandal it will cause and the hardships for all of us. This won’t be easy, for any of us.”

“And Mother! How can Mother handle him being here knowing what he represents?”

“I don’t know, Nick, I just don’t know.”

“When are you going to tell Rosa about Heath?”

*

Rosa was Rosalie Grace Simon, Jarrod’s fiancée. The Irish woman of 29 had red auburn hair, green eyes and bore an Irish brogue when her temper flared. She was the daughter of Major George Simon, one of Jarrod’s superiors in the Army during the war. After the war, Major Simon turned to Jarrod to care for all of his legal finances and when the Major decided to run for Senator he turned to Jarrod to assist with his campaign. The Major thought highly of Jarrod and found him to be an honorable man. The Major had two daughters and one was married with two beautiful children. Working in one of the clinics in San Francisco, Rosa was independent and too career-oriented finding herself too busy to consider looking for a husband. A widow for 10 years, the Major wanted to see his daughter secure and happy in her life allowing him the peace of mind knowing she would be loved when it was his time to come. So the Major decided to play matchmaker for the young couple he thought were suited perfectly.

The Major had his work cut out for him by playing matchmaker with his strong willed daughter and the equally strong willed Jarrod. For a year the young couple fought the attraction they shared for each other. But a chance meeting at the clinic between a badly beaten Jarrod and his caring nurse Rosa would become the breakthrough the Major needed. The two grew close when Rosa helped take part in Jarrod’s physical and mental rehabilitation from the beating that left him temporarily paralyzed.

After Jarrod’s yearlong recovery, the couple began officially courting. The courtship lasted a year before Jarrod proposed to Rosa on New Year’s Eve last year. Both families were overjoyed with the announcement. The Barkley Family came to know Rosa closely during Jarrod’s recovery and they all loved her and hoped she would become the future Mrs. Jarrod Barkley. Victoria loved her future daughter-in-law and for the first time since her mother’s death Rosa was thrilled with the idea of having a mother again. Audra finally received a big sister that she always wanted and the ladies shared a very special bond. Nick adored his soon to be big sister and he felt a peace in his heart knowing his Pappy finally found his true love.

*

“I haven’t even thought that far yet,” Jarrod sat down on the sofa and massaged his temples. “It probably depends on tomorrow and what happens. If he comes then I’ll wire Rosa and ask her to come to the Ranch. If he doesn’t then I guess I will have to consider how to tell her.”

Jarrod stood up and stretched and walked over to Nick and patted him on the back, “Come on Brother Nick. We better try and get some sleep tonight.” Both brothers walked up the stairs and went to their bedrooms.

Nobody in the Barkley household would sleep that night. Each family member was thinking about a young man named Heath Thomson and how he had changed their lives forever.

* * * * * * * *

An hour away from the ranch on the outskirts of Stockton, Heath was laying in his bedroll with his arms resting under his head looking up at the night sky. He, too, wasn’t sleeping that night. His thoughts were on the Barkley family and whether going to the ranch tomorrow was a good idea. Part of him felt a pain in his gut and wanted to know what it was like to have siblings. But another part of him felt he was being selfish and that he should think what this would do to his new family. He was use to the prejudices that came with being a bastard, but they had no clue.

It was Victoria Barkley that caught his attention. Thinking of her coming tonight and inviting him to the ranch confused him. He figured she was the last person who would want him at the ranch. How would she truly feel having him live there? And when Stockton found out about him, the news would be scandalous. Would she regret her decision?

As he thought of Tom Barkley’s widow he thought of what she told him tonight. With a smile gracing his lips he spoke out loud to only the night air, “Tomorrow, Mrs. Barkley, you will have the peace of mind knowing your husband never meant to forsake you.”

* * * * * * * *

The following morning each of the Barkley family members slowly gathered in the dining room for breakfast. It was apparent on each face that neither Barkley had much sleep.

“Well I see all of you look as bad as I feel.” Victoria commented to her children seated around the table while she entered the dining room.

“Good Morning Mother,” Nick got up from his seat and gave his mother a bear hug followed by a kiss.

“Good Morning Nick. Thank you. Good Morning Audra, Jarrod.” Victoria returned her son’s affection and then took her seat at the opposite end of the table from Jarrod.

“Good Morning Mother.” Jarrod and Audra both replied.

“I think it’s best that we just treat today as any other day. If…if Heath shows up we will talk…but if he doesn’t…then we must carry on.” Victoria tried to speak with authority but she didn’t feel what she was saying.

“Well I need to get that bridge fixed today. The peaches were picked yesterday and delivered to meet the contract in time, thank goodness. We have to get those horses broke for the Army contract. Not to mention the cattle drive in May that needs preparations made.” Nick rambled on the immediate concerns of the ranch in hopes of quickly changing the topic.

“I have to prepare for the Litton case. It’s going to be a big case and I fear the publicity will be all over it.”

“Well, Pappy, are you going to bring Rosa here while the case is going on so you won’t be away from her for too long?” Nick teased.

“Well Brother Nick…”

“Stop it! Just stop acting like last night never happened,” Audra cried.

“Audra…”

“I’m sorry Mother, but I can’t pretend last night didn’t happen. Whether Heath comes today or not I can’t pretend.”

“None of us can sweetheart,” Victoria’s words pierced Audra in the heart, as she knew her mother was talking about the affair.

“Oh Mother! I’m sorry!”

“I know, dear, I know.”

“Well I for one am not going to let that boy change anything for me! If he doesn’t want to live here then fine! I’m not going to think about him.” Nick tried to cover up what he was really thinking and feeling.

“How can you say that? He’s your brother!”

“Well, little sister, he’s not here now is he?”

Before Audra and Nick could continue their argument a knock at the door made everyone jump. Everyone froze in their seats as they waited to see who was at the door.

Chapter 7

Duke and Hattie McCall were sitting on their front porch drinking a cup of coffee together when they saw Heath ride up to the barn. Duke got up and met Heath as he dismounted from his horse.

“Good Morning Heath. I’m glad you came back,” Duke smiled as he reached out his hand to the young man.

“Thank ya Duke,” Heath returned the handshake.

“Why don’t you go on into the house, I’ll take care of your horse for you.”

“I should…”

“Go on. No need to procrastinate any longer.” Duke smiled and paused, seeing the hesitation on the young man’s face “they’re good people, son, real good people.”

“I know.” Heath sighed and gathered his saddlebags before giving the reins to Duke and turning to head for the big white house. Heath hesitated before knocking and then Silas opened the door.

“Uh…Howdy, I’m Heath Thomson and I’m here to see Mrs. Barkley.”

“Come in Mr. Heath.” Silas left and then soon returned, “Mrs. Barkley said to wait in the library and she’ll be right with you.”

“Thank you,” Heath followed Silas to the library where he removed his hat and began playing with it.

“Would you like me to take your things, Mr. Heath?”

“I’d like to keep ‘em, Mr.?”

“Silas,” Silas walked out of the room and left Heath alone. Heath looked around the massive room and his eyes caught Tom Barkley’s portrait above the mantle. He jumped when he heard the library door open. Turning around he saw Mrs. Barkley and all of her children enter and he became even more nervous.

“Heath, I’m glad you decided to come.” Victoria shook Heath’s hand.

“Thank ya for invitin’ me, Mrs. Barkley.”

“Heath, I believe you’ve met everyone but let me officially introduce you. This is Jarrod.”

“Heath, it’s a pleasure.” Jarrod and Heath shook hands and when Jarrod smiled at him Heath became a little more relaxed as he looked into his brother’s comforting ocean blue eyes.

“This is Nick.”

“Hello.” When they shook hands Heath could feel the strong hand of his brother’s. He felt something else in that handshake but he wasn’t sure exactly what it was. For a moment the hazel eyes and blue eyes were able to see into each other’s souls.

“This is Audra.”

“Hello Heath,” Audra didn’t bother shaking Heath’s hand, instead she embraced him with a hug. Shocked by the embrace, Heath smiled as he returned the hug.

“Now why don’t we take a seat? Heath, sit by me here on the sofa?” Victoria sat down and directed Heath to sit beside her. As he sat down Heath placed his saddlebags near his feet. Audra sat on the other side of Heath, while Nick and Jarrod both took a chair and moved them in front of the sofa. Heath felt overwhelmed and trapped by the surrounding of this new family of his. He stared down at his hat and began playing with it. His hands stopped their movements when a small hand touched his callused hands.

“Heath, would you like to have Silas take your things for you?”

“No Ma’am, I’d like to keep ‘em if that’s all right?”

“That’s fine,” Victoria smiled at the nervousness; he was so much like his father.

“Heath, maybe we should start with you telling us a bit about yourself?”

“What do ya wanna know?”

“Whatever you’d like to tell us.” Victoria encouraged, “Why don’t we start with your birthday, when were you born?”

“I’m 20 years old…I was born in Strawberry on May 8^th.”

“Oh you have a birthday coming up, that’s fabulous.” Audra smiled as she tried to calm her new brother. Heath turned and smiled at her.

“When’s your birthday?” Heath quietly asked Audra.

“September 15^th, we’re only two years apart.”

“Do you have any other family, Heath?” Jarrod asked

“My Aunt Rachel and Aunt Hannah.” Heath smiled and the love shone brightly in his eyes as he spoke of the ladies.

“Your Mother’s sisters?” Victoria asked.

“No they aren’t really my Aunts, I just call ‘em that. They were the closest to family I had and so it seemed appropriate. Aunt Rachel used to be a schoolteacher and she became a close friend with my Mama. Aunt Hannah is a former slave who came to know ‘em and became part of their little family.”

“Do you have any other family?” Audra asked him.

“Uncle Matt and Aunt Martha…my Mama’s brother…but I’d rather not talk about ‘em.” Heath’s tone of disgust was apparent to everyone.

“That’s fine, Heath.” Victoria wondered why he didn’t want to talk about them. “What was your childhood like?” Victoria really wanted to know and she became concerned by Heath’s hesitancy.

“It’s not a happy story, Ma’am.”

“That’s all right, Heath, if you don’t mind I’d like to hear it.” Victoria braced herself for what she would hear. Everyone in the room held their breath.

“I started workin’ in the mines when I was six years old. When I was nine years old I got a second job workin’ in the livery stables. That’s where I started workin’ with horses. Always loved ‘em but never could have one as a child so workin’ in the livery was the closest I came to having one. When I was 14 I left Strawberry.” Heath paused and then grinned, “That’s the short version.”

“Did you go to school?” Victoria realized he wasn’t ready for the long version of his life so she didn’t press him.

“No Ma’am. My Aunt Rachel taught me how to read and write. I’m not really good at it but I know enough to get by.”

“But why didn’t you go to school?” Audra’s innocence didn’t allow her to grasp the reason for her brother not going to school. Heath didn’t want to break her heart with the reason but he knew they wouldn’t let it go.

“The town decided it was for the best.”

“But why would they do such a thing?” Victoria, Jarrod and Nick knew what Heath meant but still Audra’s innocence didn’t allow her to understand.

“They didn’t want a bastard to be associated with their Christian children.” Realizing there was no easy way to say it Heath decided he would be blunt but Audra’s reaction made him regret it. Audra’s hands flew to her mouth as she gasped and then tears formed in her eyes.

“It’s probably best that way, Ma’am,” Heath smiled at Audra. “At least I didn’t have to worry about those stupid tests and readin’ out loud like the other kids had to.” Audra laughed and then put her hand on his. She realized what he was doing.

“Call me Audra, Heath. I’m your sister!” She playfully slapped his arm and the look of happiness returned to her eyes and he bashfully smiled at her.

“Yes, Ma’am…I mean Audra,” Everyone laughed and Heath blushed.

“What did you do after leaving Strawberry?” Jarrod asked as he puffed on his cigar and leaned back in his chair.

“A lot of stuff. I was a deputy, a scout for the Indians, worked in a rodeo in Mexico, worked on some ranches.” Everyone’s eyebrows were raised as Heath rattled off his various jobs. He was just a kid!

“When did you find out who your father was?” Jarrod continued to quiz his new brother, and everyone in the room heard the lawyer voice but Heath.

“Less than a month ago.”

“What happened less than a month ago?”

“My Mama died two days after Christmas. Before she died she showed me a newspaper clippin’ on Tom Barkley. Before I could ask her if he was my father she had died.”

“Is that clipping what made you come here?”

“No.”

“Then what did?”

“My Aunt Rachel told me what happened between ‘em.”

”What did she say?” Jarrod urged on.

“Heath, I would like to apologize for my son. Sometimes he forgets he isn’t in a courtroom.” Victoria glared at Jarrod before turning her attention back to Heath. “You’re not entitled to answer that question, Heath.”

“It’s all right Mrs. Barkley I understand where Jarrod’s comin’ from,” Heath saw the glare Victoria gave Jarrod and he felt guilty for it, because he did understand.

“I would like to answer Jarrod’s question. Actually that is why I came here today.” Heath stared at Victoria, “I thought maybe if I told ya what happened it might offer you some comfort.”

“All right Heath, if that’s what you would like.” Victoria braced herself. She never knew what really happened between her husband and Leah Thomson. Part of her wanted to know what happened, but another part of her didn’t. However, she was curious at his comment that it might offer her comfort.

“Your husband owned the mine in Strawberry and came for business. He was robbed and beaten outside of the saloon. Everything was taken, his money and anything that might have told who he was. His clothes were torn and tattered.”

“My Mama brought him back to her cabin and nursed him back to health. When he woke up he had no memory of who he was. The only thing on him was his wallet that had the name ‘Thomas’ on it so that is what they called him. He and my Mama fell in love. My Mama had never been with a man before and she thought he was the one she would spend the rest of her life with.”

“Aunt Rachel was the first to realize his memory started returnin’ and confronted him about it. He admitted everything. He had a wife named Victoria and they just lost a son, Charles, who was six months old from the fever and he had two sons ages three and eight.”

“Aunt Rachel made him tell my Mama what happened and when he told her she punched him in the jaw,” Heath chuckled at the thought. “He tried to apologize and say that he didn’t mean to hurt her but she wouldn’t listen to him. He told her he would do anything for her and told her to just let him know then he left and never came back.”

Heath looked down and played with his hat as he told the story. Everyone in the room could tell that Heath was reciting the story as told to him but there was void of emotion in his words. Everyone was stunned by what they had heard. Victoria and Audra were both crying. Victoria realized her husband never intentionally set out to betray her.

“He didn’t tell me about the amnesia,” Victoria choked. “I’m sorry about your Mother, Heath. Did…did he know…did she tell him…about you?”

“No, Ma’am, he never knew about me. He wrote her a letter but she never answered him back.” Heath grabbed his saddlebags and his trembling hands dug inside for the letter. With the letter in his hands he gave it to Victoria.

“I thought…if ya wanted I mean…he was your husband. I think ya have the right to know what it says.” Heath fumbled on his words and Victoria could see he was having a hard time with this.

“Thank you, Heath. If you’re sure.”

“I am Mrs. Barkley.”

Taking the letter Victoria gasped at her husband’s writing of Leah’s name on the envelope. “I think I’ll read this later, if that is all right?”

“That’s fine.”

“I think this is enough interrogation for awhile Heath,” Victoria smiled, “if you don’t have any questions maybe you would like to get settled?”

“Uh…” Heath paused causing a silence to envelope the room, “just a couple questions Ma’am”

“All right.”

“Do I…uh…do I look like him? I mean your husband?”

“Yes Heath you look like him,” Victoria answered.

Audra reached to the side table and took the photo of the previous night and handed it to Heath, “This is father and mother right after they were married, Heath. Standing with them in the photo is father’s brother, Uncle John and his wife Aunt Ellen.”

Staring at the photo with a man who looked like him staring back caused Heath to gasp. “I’m so sorry,” Heath’s words were just above a whisper.

“Heath, what are you sorry for?” Victoria was confused.

“What looking at me must do to ya?”

“I admit it was a shock at first but it’s not your fault, Heath.”

“But to have your husband’s bastard son look so much like him.”

“HEATH!” Victoria snapped as she turned Heath’s face to look at her, “Don’t you ever call yourself that again in my presence! I hate that word!” Victoria calmed herself and continued, “The upset over you looking like my husband has nothing to do with the circumstances of your birth. The resemblance makes me remember him more, which is not a bad thing. So I don’t want you to apologize. All right?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Heath, you said you had two questions, what was the other?” Audra curiously asked.

“Mrs. Barkley, what did ya mean about me getting’ settled?”

“Well, I thought by you coming here meant you were going to stay here.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I just came to tell ya what happened. To give ya’ll a peace of mind about him.”

“Why not stay here? This is your home, Heath. As I told you last night, all of Tom Barkley’s children deserve the same thing. Living here is part of that.”

“But I don’t want my presence to upset anybody.” Heath stood up and began for the door. “Nobody was suppose to be any wiser of who I was. This isn’t how this was suppose to be.”

“Heath?” Audra’s sweet voice caused Heath to stop and turn around to look at her, “I want a chance to get to know my brother. Please stay, Heath.”

“I would also like to get to know you, Heath,” Jarrod piped in.

Victoria watched her children with pride. Silence engulfed the room causing Jarrod and Audra to turn and glare at their brother Nick. The family was puzzled about Nick's unusual silence during Heath's homily. They knew of Nick's almost godlike hero worship of his father and worried how Nick would react. Fidgeting in his seat under the intense glares Nick mumbled, “Yeah you seem to have experience on ranches and your work yesterday was impressive. I could use another good man around the ranch.”

“Well, Heath, we want you to stay. Do you want to stay?” Victoria asked hoping to break the tension Nick’s comment caused.

Continued…