UNSETTLED, Part 2

Chapter 28-53, Epilogue

by catgirl63

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

Chapter 28

“Nick, can you see him?”

“NO!” yelled Nick rushing to grab the lantern, pulling the match across his holster and lighting the wick. Turning up the flame, his rushed forward, his movements slowed from Jarrod’s call of caution.

Holding the lantern up, he slowly made his way into the darkness stopping suddenly at a drop off. Nick lay on his stomach and held the lantern out as far as he could reach. The light flickering on the walls of the mine shaft, reaching down into the darkness.

“Heath.” whispered Nick, his eyes making out the still form of his brother laying on his side five feet from him, his leg twisted in an impossible angle, his left arm underneath him, his right arm stretched out to the side, his head pressed against the dirt.

“HEATH! HEATH!” screamed Nick trying to rouse his brother. “I’M COMING, LITTLE BROTHER. HOLD ON!”

Rushing back to the rope, he called and waited for Jarrod to throw down another rope. Jarrod climbed down, the anguished look of Nick taking his breath away.

“Jarrod, what if he’s dead.” whispered Nick his voice broken by heart wrenching sobs. “I may have killed by own brother.”

Pulling Nick to him, Jarrod squeezed tightly, put his hands on his shoulders and looked into the guilt ridden hazel eyes, “Nick, you were only protecting yourself. Heath didn’t know what he was doing. You don’t know he’s dead. Where is he, Nick?”

Wiping the tears from his eyes, Nick led Jarrod to the drop off.

“Nick, stay here I’ll hand him to you.” stated Jarrod jumping down into the hole with the lantern and saddlebags before Nick could respond.

Sitting the lantern on the ground, shouting to Nick when he felt the pulse beat beneath his fingers. Jarrod ran his hands over Heath’s body feeling for any contorted bones in his other limbs. Pushing on Heath’s ribs, he felt them give way under his fingers.

Turning Heath onto his back, Jarrod ran his fingers down his left arm relieved at the solid bones. Holding the lantern closer to his face, Jarrod startled at the blue eyes under the half open slits staring at the light.

“Heath, can you hear me?” asked Jarrod in a loud voice.

“Heath, look at me!”

Moving the lantern to the side slightly, the blue eyes followed the source of light. Jarrod watched the movements of the sluggish confused eyes.

Putting his hand on Heath’s arm, Jarrod pinched it and called, “HEATH!”

“Jarrod, what’s going on!” yelled Nick. “Is Heath awake?”

The sound of the anxiety-filled baritone reached into the subconscious of the prone man, his plea coming out with a moan of pain. “Nic..”

“HEATH!” called Nick. “I’m right here!”

“Nick!” called Heath frantically the pain in his body rising, the waves crashing in his ears, his arms moving, his hands seeking to hold onto an invisible item in the air, his breaths coming rapid and in gasps. “Nick, don’t leave me in the dark!”

Heath’s frightened pleas scared his older brothers. Jumping into the hole, Nick knelt by Heath and grabbed onto his outstretched hand.

“I’m here, Heath. I’m here.” urged Nick.

“Tunnel’s dark, Harry! I can’t stay in the dark! I can’t, Harry!” screamed Heath, his eyes filling with terror at the thought of being sequestered into the darkness alone. Pushing upward, his eyes rolled back, his collapsing body held securely in Nick’s trembling arms.

“We’ll get you out of the dark, Heath.” replied Nick softly glancing at Jarrod’s pinched white face. “Let’s splint his leg and get ‘em out of here.”

Working together, the brothers straightened and splinted the injured leg, tied a bandage around the injured head and wiped the remains of the dripping blood of the still man.

Nick pushed Jarrod up and wrapped the rope under Heath’s armpits. Jarrod pulled and Nick held onto the unconscious man as he was lifted slowly up to the next level, out of Nick’s view. Handing the lantern up first, Nick grabbed the extended hand and pulled himself out of the hole.

Carrying their brother over to the other rope, Nick took the end of the rope around Heath and tied it to his belt. Climbing hand over hand, he reached the top and pulled himself up onto the path.

“Ready, Jarrod?” called Nick after wrapping the rope to Coco’s saddle horn.

“Ready!”

Taking Coco’s bridle Nick slowly lead him forward, stopping when he heard Jarrod’s faint cry.

Rushing back to the hole, he struggled to pull Heath out of the hole, breathing and sweating heavily from the dead weight of his little brother. Taking a hold of Heath’s belt, Nick pulled the rest of him out of the hole and dragged him over to the side.

Checking the splint and bandage, Nick nodded when Jarrod joined him. Nick took the ropes off Heath and Coco, climbed up and pulled on Heath as Jarrod pushed him upwards. Nudging Coco, Nick started down the trail with Jarrod and Jingo following.

Chapter 29

Laying on the floor of the cell, he pretended to sleep. His body hurting from the beating taken the previous day. Feigning unconsciousness, striving to keep the inhumane guards away a little longer.

“It’s time, Thomson.” whispered Harry in his ear. “We’ll be free men soon.”

Two men, one more of a boy, scarcely age fifteen, their forms resembling scarecrows more than men, worked their way out of their cell. Their eyes watching intently for those who would stop their progress in their last bid for freedom before inevitable death would claim them as it had the others.

Reaching the start of the tunnel, Harry grabbed onto the boy’s arm when he started to back away from the gaping hole. The terror in the lad’s face clearly taking hold of his mind, nightmarish reminders of his early boyhood in the mines, being forced to work in the suffocating and horrifying darkness, waiting for the charges to disintegrate his small body.

Letting four men go in front of them, Harry took Heath’s face in his hands and drew his eyes away from the darkness. “Heath, do like we talked about now. You can do it! Harry’s right here.”

His friend’s voice reached through his terror, taking shallow breaths Heath fought to drive the terror inside him back down. Harry watched as the terror slowly left the ocean colored eyes and clarity returned. Nodding, Heath forced his mind to dwell on sunshine and he planted one foot in front of another.

The tentative steps reviewed by Harry while he held his breath. He had vowed to get the boy out and he wouldn’t back down on that vow. Heath, reminded him of his own son with blonde hair and blue eyes.

Anger was often Harry’s companion when he was forced to watch the brutality the teenager took with winces and gasps. No outcries of pain from Heath would be heard when he was awake, only in his fevered and pained mind when he wasn’t aware.

Entering the tunnel and heading to the end, all hell broke loose when bodies started falling back into the tunnel, bullets piercing them, the holes turning bloody, the shots echoing deep in the hearts of those in the darkness.

Stronger men pushed the weaker ones to the sides of the tunnel walls, scrambling backwards in their bid to reach the haven of their cells, away from the victim claiming bullets.

The confusion and panic startled Heath, his concentration on the picture of sunshine slipping, his eyes seeing the darkness closing in on him.

Harry was fighting with a guard, the strength in his battered body not even a shadow of the guard’s strength. Grabbing a board, Heath swung and hit the guard in the arm, knocking him to the ground.

Screaming at Heath to run and pushing the boy ahead of him, Harry’s back felt on fire from the three bullets that entered it. Falling forward onto Heath, his eyes were unseeing when he took the boy down with him.

Struggling under the weight on the back of his legs, Heath turned over and stared into the dead eyes, hearing the distinct sound of the hammer on a pistol.

Looking into the black barrel, the hammer clicked on an empty chamber. His malnutrition, abused body flinched in preparation for the bullet, he knew would be soon entering and ending his tormented days in the living hell. His eyes closed when the barrel was brought down onto his head instead.

EARTHQUAKE!!

Confusion and fear rang out through his mind, his thoughts were screaming EARTHQUAKE. His balance affected, his legs feeling as though he were a marionette puppet. Strings were holding up his shoulders, his legs flopping uselessly against the moving earth, his hand lost its hold on the pail.

A scream pierced the air, falling downwards he realized it had been from his own lips. The dirt welcomed him with a hard greeting, pain flared in his side, his head bounced off the immovable object it connected with and then the pain stopped.

Smelling the dirt, the dead air of the tunnel, he held himself still hoping the guards would miss him and think he was dead. His mind confused, listening for signs of his companions and not hearing any but the shouts of the guards. Moving his hand towards the board he felt by his head, he held onto the weapon.

His terror filled mind seeing the image of his friend’s body, blood oozing from the bullet holes. Hearing the approach of the guard, he climbed to his feet staying in the shadows, terror rising up from the darkness that was waiting to swallow him whole.

Swinging, satisfaction and revenge flared briefly through him as he stalked his prey relentlessly. This one would pay for Harry’s death. Harry who was a friend to him and helped him through when he wanted to lay there and die. This one would die for his friend, Harry.

Swinging again, his stomach exploded in pain and he was hurled backwards. The darkness grabbing and pulling him down with it, the scream of horror leaving his lips when his feet left the ground. Plummeting and landing, tremendous pain sent brilliant colors flashing in his eyes before awareness was taken away.

The light hurt his eyes as he followed it, he could feel the darkness lingering on the edges, threatening to take him forever. Keeping his eyes on the light to fight the overwhelming darkness.

The voice reached his ears, that voice belonged to Nick. Nick would help him fight the darkness.

Calling out, his head and body protested, his thoughts become foggy again. No, Nick’s not here. Harry’s in the tunnel. Harry would help, they helped each other survive.

Screaming out in terror from the darkness swarming in from the edges, he pushed up on his arm to escape it’s grabbing tentacles. Pain exploded from his leg and a curtain fell over his eyes.

Chapter 30

The ride to Pine Crest with the injured man in the back of the wagon had been brutal on the three family members with him. The jarring of the wagon on his broken leg sent shock waves of pain through the limb, moans and screams resulting from the movements, twisted and churned the stomachs of his three caretakers.

Blood loss and pain were taking it’s toll on his battered body. Fever started in him, his breathing sounded wrong, it was forced and his mumbling was giving the worried three a glimpse into a past, it’s owner would have preferred to leave buried.

Heath’s body finally succumbed to the collapse it had been fighting. His mumbling silenced, moans or screams no longer left his lips. Only the harshness of his breathing was heard over the rattling of the chains and the plodding of the horse’s hooves. The absence of sound from Heath became more nerve wracking and tormenting than his moans or screams of pain.

Rachel and Jarrod checked continually to ensure he was breathing, Nick stepped up the pace of the horses once it became clear that Heath wasn’t feeling pain from the jostling.

Nick’s dark thoughts took over his mind as he drove. Tears sprang to his eyes, remembering the instinctive kick he handed his brother, which sent him off the edge of the tunnel. Guilt hovered and encircled him knowing he was responsible for the additional injuries.

His mind went back over Heath’s last visit to Stockton. Sitting on Lookout Peak after working all day together, Nick asked a question that had been bothering him for quite a while.

“Heath?”

Heath, laying on the ground, his hands entwined behind his head, lifted his hat and opened one eye to look at his older brother. “Yeah, Nick?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure, I might even answer it.” smirked Heath, seeing the sarcastic retort was lost on the other man.

“I, uh, well, I was wondering why you did it?” asked Nick hesitantly.

Puzzled, Heath sat up and gave Nick his full attention, “I’m not sure.”

“Oh.” replied Nick, his face deep in thought.

Grinning slightly, Heath stated, “Course, if you elaborate on what I did, I might be able to answer the question better.”

Nick took a shaky breath and stated. “I was wondering why when you left, uh, the first time, well, you came to Stockton to get what you were entitled to. But you left without having Jarrod set anything up so you get your share. You turned your back on your share.”

Thinking on the question, Heath took out his makings and rolled a cigarette. Accepting a light from Nick, he stared at the falling ball of orange in the sky and gathered his thoughts.

“I did come with the sole purpose of collecting what was mine. Your family had everything and I had nothin’ growing up. I figured I was entitled to what, our father, built up.”

Shaking his head, Nick frowned, “You should’ve been here growing up.”

“Nick, sometimes things are best left in the past.” said Heath quietly, his thoughts drifting for a minute before he reined them back to the present.

“Anyways, ya’ll were different than I thought you’d be. I expected a family of rich people looking down their noses at everyone. It confused me when you weren’t like that, I never expected it.”

Staring at the end of the cigarette, Heath laughed, “Boy howdy, I didn’t know what to make of the family. I didn’t know what I was gonna do. I had this big chip on my shoulder and a right to what was mine but something in my gut told me, I could have so much more than money.”

“So much more? Do you mean living and working on the ranch with us?” inquired Nick surprised at the admission his quiet brother was sharing.

“Yeah. Money’s never been that important to me. Sure I wished I’ve had some from time to time, but you can’t miss what you didn’t have. That night when you came to the bunkhouse to get me, I’d made the decision to stay and work as a regular ranch hand. Nick, why’d you think I worked for the railroad?”

Turning crimson, Nick said sheepishly, “The only things you seem to have of value and worth anything were your horse and guns. Since your guns seemed to be well taken care of, I thought you were a hired killer.”

Smashing the end of his cigarette into the ground, Heath glanced into the hazel eyes, looked away and shrugged, “They’ve come in handy a time or two.”

Cocking his head sideways at the remark, Nick stifled the urge to ask Heath to explain what he meant.

“Well, anyways, I left cause I couldn’t subject your Mother and Audra to all the fights and yelling anymore. It wasn’t fair to them and I, uh, was having nightmares for the first time in a long while. I didn’t care about the money and knew we wouldn’t be able to work together. Nick, if I’d known how things were going to be in the beginning, I’d never have come.” admitted Heath with a deep sigh.

“Well, I’m glad you did, little brother.” smiled Nick widely, clapping him on the back.

Smirking, Heath nodded and stood up, “Course, I also left to protect your ego.”

“What are you talking about? Protect my ego!” stated Nick, his face squished up in confusion.

Untying Charger’s reins, Heath jumped in the saddle, “I couldn’t keep beating you up in front of the hands and the family! I had to leave you some pride.”

Blustering, Nick started towards Charger and yelled, “YOU DIDN’T BEAT ME UP! NOT ALL THE TIME!”

Laughing loudly, Heath let Charger have full rein while Nick and Coco galloped after him towards the main house.

Wiping the tears in his eyes, Nick’s heart was pounding as Pine Crest came into view and he sent a silent plea to his unconscious brother.

‘Heath, we’ve come so far these past months. Don’t leave me, little brother.’

Chapter 31

Rachel shook her head, indicating now was not the time, at the twin glare of accusations directed her way from the blue and hazel eyes. Their glimpsing of the telltale signs of whippings and bullet scars on the back of their little brother, shaking them to the core of their very souls.

Dr. Martin sensing the temperature drop in the room between the occupants, stated loudly, “If you can’t focus on Heath and what we need to do for him, leave.”

The sharp words drew the brothers’ focus back to the young man laying on the bed, fighting for breaths, struggling against a low fever.

“John, he’s really fighting for his breaths.” worried Rachel using a wet cloth to wipe her nephew’s face.

“Jarrod, grab some pillows out of the next room.” ordered the physician listening to the congestion forming in Heath’s lungs. Shaking his head in dismay. “How long was he in the hole?”

“I guess it was about an hour before we got him outside of it.” whispered Nick.

Seeing the extra pillows, Nick pulled Heath up to his chest and laid him back down after Jarrod arranged the pillows. The incline of his upper body seeming to ease his struggle slightly.

“Hope, we need to make a steam tent.”

Pushing on Heath’s stomach, the doctor frowned at the boot mark and felt the ribs move under his touch. Using a candle, he opened one eyelid and checked the pupils, repeating his examination by following the same method on the other.

Taking thread and needle, he stitched the cut and wrapped a clean bandage around it.

Entering with a sheet, Hope helped her father create a tent over the bed. Sitting the boiling pot on the bedside table, Hope assisted her father to seal the edges to keep the steam inside.

Gesturing to the others, Dr. Martin walked into the external room and waited for them to sit before taking a deep breath.

“His broken leg right now is the least of Heath’s worries. It’s a clean break. Once we plaster it, he should have no problems after it heals. His cut on his head was deep but thankfully you were able to get the bleeding to stop. He does have fifteen stitches and a nice bump. He has a mild concussion which’ll give him one hell of a headache when he wakes up.”

Pausing, Dr. Martin hesitated and cleared his throat. “I’ll keep a close eye on the bruise to his stomach. Sometimes, these types of injuries can cause internal bleeding. I don’t see any indications of that, I’m just being cautious.”

Groaning, Nick leaned forward and covered his face with his hands. The pace of the guilt eating away at him increased from the doctor’s words. “I didn’t mean to kick him.”

“It’s not your fault. Heath would’ve killed you, Nick.” stated Rachel firmly. Jarrod looked at her in shock, realizing she truly believed what she just stated.

“How can you sound so sure of that?” asked Jarrod.

“It’s true, Jarrod. Heath was somewhere else in his mind when he was going after Nick. He didn’t know it was Nick. He thought it was the enemy.” explained Rachel quietly.

Grabbing onto her hand, Nick asked gently, “Where was he, Miss Caulfield? What place causes him so much terror?”

John nodded at her questioning glance. “They’ll find out anyway when we talk about Heath’s lungs.”

“Heath was back in Carterson Prison. He was there towards the end of the war.”

Nick stared at Heath’s aunt in disbelief, color draining from the tanned face from the images the name of the prison evoked. Jarrod, having done the mental math, felt as though he were going to be sick. His little brother was in that hellhole when he was just a kid. The whispered words of anguish clearly heard, “My god, he was only a boy.”

Both brothers stunned, the words from Rachel hanging in the air of the room. Dr. Martin cleared his throat and continued.

“Unfortunately, from my experience with your brother, he’s very susceptible to chest colds and infections which attack the lungs. Mainly from his incarceration during the war and the abuse his body suffered. The bad air in closed mines is very dangerous for someone prone to lung problems. I think, also, Heath inhaled the dust which would’ve been floating in the air while he was unconscious after the earthquake. Add to this, a couple broken ribs and we have one mighty sick man on our hands.”

“Heath’s gonna be okay?” asked Nick, his voice quivering uncontrollably. “He’s not gonna die, is he?”

“Not on my shift, he isn’t Nick. Not if I can help it.” stated the physician firmly before leaving the room.

Chapter 32

“Dammit Heath, look at me!” growled Nick wanting to get scale the wall the weak man was erecting, wanting to disappear the look of shame in Heath’s eyes, angered when the blonde’s head turned away and looked at the opposite wall.

“Tired, Nick.” said Heath knowing his lack of response would irritate and anger his older brother, but not really caring at this point, the exhaustion setting in, overshadowing anything he may want or yearn for.

His body having fought off the fever, felt weak as a new born kitten. His chest still hurt from the pneumonia that almost killed him, his ribs now bound tightly, felt immensely better. His leg laying on a pillow was encased in a cast of plaster. His head would be free of the stitches in a few days.

“Heath.”

“Nick, leave your brother alone.” stated Victoria walking into the room, crossing over and sitting on the bed. She smiled gently at Heath and brushed the bangs off his forehead, relieved at the lack of fever. His face pale, strained from the battle he had waged and won.

In the throes of the feverish days and nights, he could remember small snatches of things.

He could remember Dr. Martin scolding him for trying to get out of bed.

He could remember Jarrod and Nick urging him to stay with them.

He could remember Mrs. Barkley and Audra crying when they arrived.

He could remember Aunt Rachel telling him to be strong and fight.

He could remember Mrs. Barkley telling how much she loved him.

They were all there, day in and day out, talking and urging, yelling and shouting. Talking about the future, questioning the past, living and fighting the moment with him.

With him.

With him, by his side, holding his hand, wiping his fevered brow, helping him deal with the pain and keeping him from passing through death’s door.

He was not alone anymore.

He felt it in his delirium, in his fevered nightmares, in brief moments of lucidity, in his very soul.

He was surrounded by love. That feeling alone gave him the resolve and strength to make his way back.

He was surrounded by love. That feeling that had been missing from his life for so long.

He was surrounded by love. That feeling was what he had been looking for.

Then, with waking and clarity came the awful realization, they knew about Carterson.

The part of his life which held shame, guilt and remorse for him.

The part of his life which he wasn’t sure would ever fully leave him.

The part of his life which had the power to make the now grown man shake in terror, eight years later.

Looking over at Nick, Victoria said firmly, “Nick, why don’t you have some lunch and see if there’s a wire from the family?”

Catching the look in her eye, Nick swallowed the protest rising in his throat. Ruffling the blond hair, he sighed, “Yes, Mother. Heath, I’ll be back in a little while.”

“Okay.” whispered Heath his voice belaying his exhaustion.

Hearing the door close, Victoria squeezed the hand closest to her then caressed his cheek, “I see you didn’t finish your broth, Heath.”

“I’m not all that hungry, ma’am.” replied Heath stifling a yawn, the touch of her hand on his cheek sending warmth through him.

Closing his eyes, he could remember his mother’s touch on his cheek. Mrs. Barkley’s was the same. A smile graced his exhausted features and Victoria wondered silently about it.

His face relaxed into sleep, his breathing free from gasps and congestion, floated to her ears like music on a summer’s breeze.

Leaning forward, she kissed his forehead. “I love you as if you were my son, Heath. When you’re stronger we’re going to have a talk about that.”

Chapter 33

Nick sat in the chair, his head resting against the wall, eyes staring at the pattern in the ceiling. His mind unconsciously keeping alert for the even breathing of his brother’s sleep to change. Gaining strength with each passing day, Heath was slowly making his way back to the physically strong man he was before his plunge into the abandoned mine shaft.

The earthquake seemed to have opened a torrent of memories long suppressed within his little brother. The memories overwhelming him, the terror in his eyes ripping out the heart of his older brother, the shame in the sky blue eyes angering Nick.

Angry at Heath’s mother for denying the family the chance to know Heath during his childhood.

Angry at Father for not taking responsibility to return to Strawberry and check on Heath’s mother.

Angry at Heath’s relatives for the abuse they willing handed out to a child.

Angry at those who would let a mere child enter the war of brothers.

Angry at those who sanctioned the treatment delivered in Carterson.

Angry at himself for not knowing how to dissolve the terror in Heath’s eyes after waking.

A frown creased his handsome face remembering the rough treatment he had handed Heath, from the moment he heard the words, trembling and cracking the pedestal his father was standing on.

“Your father’s bastard son.”

Those words were forever burned in his memory.

Those words were forever seared in his heart.

Those words had forever altered his world and made it better.

Those words had forever given him a brother.

The frown changed to a wide smile, his countenance changing at thoughts of the little brother who came to them as a man. Protectiveness rose up within him as his eyes fell upon his sleeping brother.

A brother whose passion for ranching matched his own.

A brother whose passion for family matched his own.

A brother whose passion for those he held in his heart matched his own.

A brother who was forever connected to him, bound by blood, bound by a father, bound by love.

Realizing the sky blue eyes were staring at him from the bed, Nick was startled from his thoughts. Grinning, he leaned forward in his chair, delighted to see the lop-sided grin that was flashed back at him.

“Nick, ain’t ya got a ranch to run?” teased Heath grateful for the strong hands which quickly helped him up to a sitting position against the headboard.

“How bout you come to Stockton and be my partner on the ranch, little brother?” asked Nick, hazel eyes alit with hope.

Heath turned his eyes away from the hazel eyes that were beseeching him. Staring at the wall, he slowly gathered his emotions, knowing what this man, his brother, was asking of him.

This man who’d become so important to him.

This man who’d willingly sacrificed his nights to help fight his little brother’s inner demons.

This man who’d share all he had with another brother.

This man who was asking for a partner to run an empire.

This man who was asking one brother to another.

Nick held his breath when Heath pulled his eyes away from his. Looking at the head, cocked slightly sideways deep in thought, he was struck by the similarity to his father. He hadn’t noticed before.

Heath turned towards Nick, his fingers scratching the stubble on his face, his voice hesitant and quiet.

“Okay, Nick.”

Chapter 34

Since the death of his mother, things had been changing for Heath Thomson.

Things were changing because of the two words he hesitantly spoke to his brother. Things were changing because he was changing.

As with all things in life, change is inevitable. Change occurs in one’s environment, in one’s world, inside oneself. Change can be rapid as a blink of an eye or it can be slow as watching a tree grow with the naked eye. You either see it or you don’t.

Change was caused by events, circumstances and consequences. These three things, whether accidental or deliberate, by his hand or by the hands of others - they all worked together, shifting, molding and changing things in his world, in his environment, in himself.

His world had become richer by his arrival into the valley where the Barkley ranch resided. At the time of his initial arrival, he would not have considered himself richer by any means. Monetarily, emotionally or otherwise.

The battles he endured with his new brother, unknown to him, were the events which started the chain of circumstances which would lead him to this point.

The circumstance of his leaving behind all the name Barkley meant was the circumstance and Nick questioning how one could do that, the consequence. This act by Heath was accidental, yet it caused a change with far reaching consequences into the future, unseen by the naked eye.

Who would have thought that one event would have started the joining of the futures of Heath Thomson and Nick Barkley?

Who would have thought that one event would have been the tiny grain of sand on which the base for their brotherhood had started?

Who would have thought that one event would take them on an emotional journey together as brothers?

Who would have thought that? Certainly not Heath.

The deliberate act of Jake Matson, the shooting of Nick and the consequence of Heath suddenly realizing how much the possible death of Nick would affect him. This act by the hands of another was deliberate, but was the first act which bound him to his brother in a way Heath would never have imagined possible.

Heath was never a person to place large hopes on the word ‘if’. Never a person to place much thought into things such as kismet, karma or fate. Heath was a person who dealt with the world he saw through his eyes, heard with his ears, felt with his hands and experienced himself. He was a person who used his senses without conscience thought in the daily routine of life.

Things had changed. Heath was placing his hopes for the future in the return to Stockton and working with his brother on the ranch.

Sitting on the porch of Aunt Rachel’s small house in the setting sun, his casted leg propped on the rail, he smiled remembering the night they spent together before Nick left Pine Crest with his mother.

“When are you coming to Stockton?” asked Nick. “You are still coming, right?”

“Nick, I told ya’ about ten times already!” gruffed Heath. “I’ll be there in a month.”

Turning crimson, Nick replied, “Guess I’m a little anxious. Sorry.”

“After we work together all day for a while again, we’ll see how anxious ya’ still are.” smirked Heath with a triumphant smile. “Gin.”

Throwing his cards down in disgust, Nick growled, “If I wanna beat you, I’m gonna have to get in some practice before you come home.”

Picking up the cards and shuffling, Nick’s hands stilled as his ears heard Heath say quietly, “Home?“

Heath’s heart skipped a beat from the hope that single word caused. The word rolling on his tongue as if it were foreign, wondering if the Barkley ranch would ever be home to him.

“Heath?” asked Nick spying the far away look in the blue eyes.

“Sorry.” blushed Heath realizing he had spoken the word aloud.

Placing the cards on the table, Nick leaned forward, “You got nothing to be sorry for. I know the ranch may not seem like home to you, Heath. We just need to take it one day at a time. It’ll work out, you’ll see.”

“Okay, Nick. One day at a time.” sighed Heath picking up the deck, blue eyes flashing mischievously as he asked, “Poker?”

Nick rubbed his hands in anticipation and sneered, “This’ll be like taking candy from a baby! Deal!”

Heath winked and picked up the cards. Nick catching the wink, watched the deft fingers working the cards like he had seen on the riverboats, looked into the sparkling blue eyes and said sarcastically, “For pete’s sake! Let’s play Go Fish!”

Heath dealt the cards for Go Fish and laughed loudly when Nick rolled his eyes, “Oh great! Just what I need, a funny brother!”

Chapter 35

The windows of the cabin were dark, the porch no longer decorated with chairs and flower boxes. The desired contents within the small cabin had been removed since the owner’s departure. All that was left, were items that had no special value to Rachel. Together, Heath and Rachel cleared Hannah’s cabin also. Personal mementos of the small woman they held firmly in their hearts, divided equally while they shared stories, laughter and tears.

Leaning against Charger, his smile gentle, his heart filling with sadness and happiness at his thoughts. Heath had been honored to escort his aunt down the aisle in the courthouse to marry Dr. John Martin last week. Hope was her bridesmaid, Sheriff Jonas Moreland the best man and Heath was the witness. He had never seen his aunt more radiant than she was on her wedding day.

He was happy she had found someone to share her future with, someone to share her dreams. The two made a perfect couple and complimented each other in so many ways.

A sadness overshadowed his happiness for his aunt. Sadness from the reality, the last member of his small family growing up was gone. Rachel was starting a new life and so was he. Both were anxious and excited, both were nervous and hopeful.

Tightening the girth, Heath looked over at the small cabin one last time. The time had come for him to step on the path of his next challenge in life. Climbing on Charger, he nudged the bay forward in a westerly direction.

The rope of the pack horse tied to his saddle horn, the ropes of four horses tied to the packhorse. These were the best of the horses he had captured in these mountains. Everything he owned was either on the packhorse or in his saddlebags.

Stopping at the edge of town, he stared straight ahead and fought the urge to look back.

‘Don’t do it. No looking back from now on.’ thought Heath nudging Charger forward down the road, stopping for the night after the sun began to set in the western sky.

Rising early the next morning, Heath shrugged into his slicker and mounted. Drops of rain fell, darkening the ground with its moisture, darkening the coats of the horses. The rain was steady throughout the morning, dampening everything except his desire to reach the Barkley ranch.

The boundary of the ranch came into view through the sheet of rain. His stomach became a bundle of nerves when he rode into the yard. Stopping in front of the mansion, he dismounted and tied the reins to the hitching post.

Walking up the steps, he looked into the hazel eyes and took the extended hand in a firm grip.

“You’re a day late!” grumbled Nick with a smile clapping Heath on the shoulder with his free hand.

“Boy howdy, guess it’s better than being a dollar short, Nick, like ya’ was the last time we played cards.” retorted Heath, his blue eyes beholding a look of innocence.

Laughing loudly, Nick grinned. “Right you are, little brother. Let’s get these ponies bedded down.”

Flashing a lop-sided grin, Heath nodded and walked beside Nick to the barn while Victoria watched from the window, praying this would be a sight she would see for many years to come.

Chapter 36

Two months passed quickly to Heath who found himself becoming more unsure of his decision to return to the Barkley ranch. Watching the sunrise over the valley from the edge of the ranch yard, he wondered if today would be different.

Since coming to the ranch, he’d been welcomed back into the family by Mrs. Barkley and his siblings. He was getting to know the family members and strengthening his bond with each of them everyday. If he had not returned to the ranch, he would have missed this wonderful opportunity.

Nick treated him as a brother, but not as a partner in the running of the ranch. Suggestions, ideas, orders provided by Heath were not considered or thrown to the side, discarded as one would simply toss away an apple core.

Nick, having run the ranch for six years since the death of their father, seemed to be unwilling to allow anyone to share the load or responsibility. From the time Nick was small and sat on his Father’s knee, his path in life had been laid out for him. He had matured into adulthood working the ranch, stepping in naturally when his Father was struck down. To him, he was doing what he was supposed to do and didn’t understand Heath’s annoyance or concerns.

In the eyes of some of the ranch crew, Heath was just another brother of the boss who worked on the ranch. Their benign treatment of him caused by his brother’s seeming lack of trust to rely on Heath and give him a set of the reins.

Conversations with Nick hadn’t helped, neither had the shouting matches they recently engaged in or the throwing of fists. Working with Nick each day was proving to be more of a chore than a pleasure.

Sighing deeply, he shook his head and entered the barn. Saddling Charger, he walked the bay over to the house and tied him to the hitching post. Opening the back door, he stopped at the sight of Victoria seated at the table.

“Good morning, Heath.” smiled Victoria rising, setting breakfast and coffee on the table for him.

“Morning, Mrs. Barkley.” replied Heath sitting in the chair. “I didn’t realize anyone else was up.”

“It was such a beautiful sunrise, I couldn’t let it’s glory pass without honoring it.” explained Victoria quietly.

“Sunrise is my favorite time of the day.” admitted Heath with a small smile. “Watching the sunrise is good for the soul. It’s sorta like a cleansing.”

Nodding in agreement, Victoria joined Heath in breakfast. Conversation centering mostly around the upcoming fund raiser for the orphanage Audra was working diligently on.

“Heath, what are your plans for today?” asked Victoria her question an innocent one which hid the real reason it was asked.

Putting his cup on the table, Heath frowned, “I’m gonna check the north fence line.”

“You’re not helping Nick get ready for the trial drive?”

“Nick don’t need any help.” retorted Heath, blushing from the harshness of the words. “I, uh, mean he knows what he needs to do to get ready, Mrs. Barkley.”

Victoria inwardly sighed. She had sensed something was amiss between the two. Her intuition was right. It appeared Nick was finding it difficult to loosen his hold on running the entire ranch. Heath’s blue eyes had betrayed him with the pain and confusion she had seen in them over the last weeks.

“Have you been on trail drives before?”

“About ten.” replied Heath shaking his head in amusement. “A trail drive is hard work. You never know about the conditions of the trail, how the men will hold up, what the weather is gonna be like or if you’ll be alive at the end of it. Every time I finish one, I’d say never again! But each year, I’d do it again without even a second thought.”

Putting a small hand on his, Victoria looked into the sky blue eyes and asked, “Heath, are you having second thoughts about being here on the ranch?”

Sucking in his breath at the directness of her question, he stared into the gray eyes of the woman he dearly wanted to call Mother, but couldn’t bring himself to in the time he had been here.

This woman had offered him the world of the Barkley family.

This woman had welcomed him into the family without hesitating.

This woman had given him her love freely and without reservation.

This woman had been there offering him comfort when he needed it.

This woman he knew he was about to hurt with his words.

“Yes, I am.”

Chapter 37

In a person’s lifetime, many people will cross your path. Their path touching yours, directly or indirectly, visible or invisible, head on or side by side.

In a person’s lifetime, many emotions are felt from hate to love, despair to triumph, sadness to happiness, calm to out-of-control.

In a person’s lifetime, you can go about your daily life without realizing the ripples you are creating in the pond by your actions. One action created small ripples, another created ripples that would spread out and rush angrily to the shore.

In Nick Barkley’s lifetime, he had experienced growing up with both parents and loved by both. They raised him to be the man he was today. A man of values, morals, honor, responsible and caring.

In Nick Barkley’s lifetime, his environment shaped him, created in him the confidence he exuded everyday, built in him a sense of right and wrong, giving him the skills needed to run an empire.

In Nick Barkley’s lifetime, he never thought he’d see Heath walk away twice from the ranch and the family.

“What do you mean you’re leaving?” stammered Nick disbelief spread across his face and into his eyes.

Stopping his work, Heath looked into the shocked hazel eyes and replied calmly, “It means what I said. After the drive, I’m moving on.”

“WHY?” shouted Nick angrily, his heart pounding crazily while comprehension was far from coming. “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?”

Snorting, Heath shook his head in resignation, walked to Charger and grabbed the canteen. Taking a healthy swig of water, he put the cap on and leaned against his mount.

Gesturing with his right hand, Heath asked, “Nick, ya’ know that patch of dry land in the south basin?”

“Yeah, what about it?” asked Nick puzzled at the switch of the topic of conversation.

“Have ya’ considered what I said about irrigating it for more orchards? Let me answer that for ya’ – No.”

“Have ya’ considered what I said about trying those new crops I found out about in Sacramento? No.”

“Have ya’ considered what I suggested about the new mare for the horse line? NO.”

“HAVE YA’ CONSIDERED WHAT I SAID ABOUT BUILDING A SEPARATE PLACE TO TRAIN THE HORSES WHERE IT’LL BE QUIET AND LESS STRESSFUL? NO.”

“HAVE YA’ CONSIDERED ANYTHING I SAID ABOUT THE TRAIL YOU WANT TO TAKE ON THE DRIVE? NO.”

With each question and answer, Heath’s voice had risen in volume until he was shouting and gesturing wildly. The old anger and frustration rising from within, flashing clearly in his blue eyes, silencing Nick’s words in his throat.

Swinging up onto Charger’s back, Heath looked down at his brother and retorted, “Ya’ don’t need or want a partner to run the ranch. If I wanted to take orders, get paid to just work and not think, I’d work for someone else. I can do that anywhere.”

“Heath, you can’t leave…”

“Ya’ said it’d be different this time. It’s not and we’re back where we started. I’m Heath Thomson and you’re Nick Barkley.”

The words cut deep into Nick’s heart while his brother galloped away. Standing in the pasture, shame rose up and shook the frame of the large man, the hurt, angry words from Heath replaying in his mind, over and over.

The shock of the truth in his brother’s words, despair and loss crumbled him to his knees. One of the most respected men in Stockton, knelt in the soft pasture grasses, tears started from realizing the mistakes he’d made, the promise he’d broken and his actions which were causing his brother to leave again.

“What have I done?”

Chapter 38

The ferocity of the slamming front door startled Victoria in the parlor. Jumping up, she caught sight of owner of the tan vest stomping up the stairs and into his room.

Hiking up her skirts, she ran up the stairs and stood in the doorway. Heath was mumbling to himself, shoving things into his saddlebags, his bedroll lay open on the bed.

“Heath?”

Looking up, Heath shook his head negatively, needing time to fight the emotions running wild in him. Taking a breath, he gruffed, “I’m sorry I have to leave today.”

Walking to the end of the bed, she held onto the brass foot board, knuckles white from the grip. “Are you coming back?”

Rolling up the bedroll, Heath’s shaky fingers tied the rawhide strings around it, his voice quiet and quivering. “I don’t know.”

Stopping in front of her, Heath smiled tenderly at the familiar touch when she caressed his cheek. “Heath, I know you’re hurting right now. Please remember this will always be your home where your family lives. A family who loves you, including me. I do love you, Heath, as much as any mother could love her child.”

Leaning down, he placed a gentle kiss on her cheek and drew the tiny lady into his arms. “I’ll write to let you know where I am.”

Wiping her tears, she nodded, “I’ll always be here for you.”

“I know, thank you. Please tell the others goodbye for me.” Kissing the top of her silver hair, Heath’s voice was thick with emotion, his throat strained. “I love you, too.”

Grabbing up his saddlebags and bedroll, he left the room and the mansion, her sobs ringing in his ears. Duke McCall left the bunkhouse and stopped in his tracks at the sight of the man, the signs of departure clearly displayed on Charger, from the rifle in the scabbard to the saddlebags and bedroll.

“Heath!” he shouted rushing up when the rider halted his horse.

His breath caught in his throat when he looked up into the owner’s emotional face. “Heath, where are you going?”

“I’m leaving, Duke. Take care of yourself.” stated Heath extending his hand down to the older man.

“I’ll miss you, Heath.” Taking his hand, Duke asked quietly, “Does Nick know you’re leaving?”

“I’m leaving sooner than I told him I’d be.” admitted Heath with a shaky sigh. “Nick won’t have a problem getting another hand to replace me on the drive. It was nice working with ya’ again, Duke.”

Nudging Charger forward, Heath galloped out of the yard and headed towards the east. Staring after Heath in the yard of the ranch he had called home for over twenty years, Duke McCall wondered if he’d ever see Tom’s blonde son again.

Chapter 39

Two weeks had passed since Heath’s departure from the ranch when Jarrod arrived in Strawberry. Rachel Martin’s wire directed Jarrod to the place Heath had gone a week before. Riding through the desolate town, he stopped at the cabin and dismounted.

Knocking on the door, he looked through the window at the lack of response from inside. Sitting on a chair, he waited in the cool air of the morning for his brother to appear.

Whistling reached his ears from the back of the cabin and he walked around the corner. Startled, Heath’s hand flashed down and brought up his gun.

“Don’t ever do that again!” snapped Heath at his shaken brother, reholstering his colt. “People are not exactly friendly in this town, Jarrod.”

“I’m sorry, Heath. I didn’t mean to startle you.” stated Jarrod following Heath to the front the cabin. “You’re looking well, Heath.”

Not responding, Heath gestured for Jarrod to sit at the table after they entered. Walking over to the stove, he grabbed the coffee pot and two mugs. Pouring coffee for both of them, Heath took a seat at the table across from his older brother.

Taking a sip of coffee, he sat back in his chair and pushed his hat back, “How’s Audra, Gene and Moth, uh, Mrs. Barkley?”

“They’re fine, Heath. I have some letters from them in my saddlebags for you.” smiled Jarrod slightly noticing Heath’s slip of Mother and the lack of Nick’s name in his question.

“Ya’ could’ve mailed them. I hear tell they’ve a postal service nowadays.” drawled Heath sarcastically.

Turning crimson at the wince on Jarrod’s face from his tone, Heath sighed and looked into his cup, “Why are ya’ here, Jarrod?”

“I’m here to ask you to take command of the trail drive.” stated Jarrod watching surprise flaring in the blue eyes before suspicion set in.

“Ya’ don’t need me for that. You got Nick.” stated Heath calmly. “It was a long ride for nothing, Jarrod.”

“Heath, Nick can’t make it.”

“What do you mean he can’t make it?” asked Heath. “Did he fall off the face of the earth or something?”

Chuckling, Jarrod shook his head. “No, little brother, he fell through some rotten boards in the loft of the barn all the way to the floor.”

“WHAT?” exclaimed Heath, pictures of a crumpled, broken Nick flashed through his mind. “IS HE ALRIGHT?”

“He’s got a broken leg, two broken ribs, mild concussion and a grouchy grizzly bear disposition.” informed Jarrod hope rising within him from Heath’s concerned eyes.

“Other than that, he’s okay, but unable to head the trail drive.”

Heath stood up and leaned against the kitchen counter, staring intently at his boots for several minutes. “You can lead the drive, Jarrod.”

“I can’t. I have a trial starting next week that will last for at least a month.”

“How about Eugene?” asked Heath looking up.

Staring into the blue eyes, Jarrod inquired firmly, “Do you honestly feel this is a responsibility Gene can handle, Heath?”

Taking a deep breath, Heath shook his head, “No, I guess not.”

Jarrod took a paper from his pocket and laid it on the table. “This is an agreement I’ve drawn up, Heath.”

Puzzled, Heath asked, “Agreement for what?”

“An agreement that states your payment for heading the trail drive. It lists your responsibility as boss on the trail drive, how to handle disbursement of the funds and other things.” explained Jarrod smiling inwardly at the fury forming in the blue eyes.

“YOU WANT ME TO SIGN THAT!”

“I thought you would be more comfortable if everything was drawn up.” said Jarrod innocently in response to the anger.

“WE’RE FAMILY! YOU DON’T HAVE DRAWN AGREEMENTS BETWEEN FAMILY!” snapped Heath offended and insulted at the idea.

“I’LL LEAD THE TRAIL DRIVE BECAUSE I’M A MEMBER OF THE FAMILY, NOT CAUSE OF SOME PAPER!”

Heath shook the small cabin when he slammed the door behind him, not seeing the wide satisfied grin on the face of his lawyer brother when he picked up the paper and put it back in his pocket.

Jarrod held his coffee cup up in a toast.

“Mother, you are a wise and wily woman. I thank you for it.”

Chapter 40

Gathering his horses, Heath and Jarrod headed to Stockton. The ride back and the night spent under the stars quiet and unobtrusive. Jarrod took his clue from his younger brother’s lack of response, allowing Heath sanctity from questions, allowing him a blanket of peace.

Heath rode behind his brother, leading his new string of horses, his mind going nonstop. At night, he lay on the bedroll after a quick dinner, his thoughts mirrored the ones he had on the ride, provoking anger and anxiety, calm and nervousness.

Arriving the next morning, Duke McCall loudly greeted the returning man.

Pounding enthusiastically on his back, Duke grinned widely, “Great to see you, Heath! Welcome back!”

Returning the foreman’s greeting, Heath smiled back, “I’ve only been gone two weeks, Duke.”

Winking, Duke leaned in and whispered, “With Nick’s attitude these past weeks, I thought you’d been gone a whole year! That fall certainly didn’t help any either.”

Chuckling, Heath lead the new horses to the corral with the foreman bending his ear, discussing everything left to do in preparation for the upcoming drive.

Shutting the gate, Heath looked over at Duke and stated, “I’d better get the howdies over with. I’ll be out in a few minutes, Duke.”

“Okay, boss.” grinned Duke heading into the barn.

Stopping in front of the door with Jarrod, Heath brushed the dust from his clothes and put his saddlebags over his shoulder. The door flew open and Audra shrieked loudly, “HEATH!”

Flying into his arms, Heath felt Jarrod’s hand on his back steadying him from his little sister’s welcome. Kissing her cheek, he gave her a strong hug lifting her off her feet, beaming happily into her eyes.

“Boy howdy, Audra. You’re even prettier than when I left, sis.”

Blushing, she smiled widely, “You’re such a tease, Heath. I’ve missed you terribly.”

Taking his arm, she lead him into the house. Jarrod followed behind his two blonde siblings, smiling at Audra’s excited chattering about the latest fund raiser for the orphanage.

“Sorry, I wasn’t there Audra. Did you get my donation?” asked Heath.

“I did, Heath, but that’s an awful lot of money. Are you sure you don’t need it?”

“The orphans need it more than I do.” assured Heath, his eyes seeing the mistress of the house entering the foyer, the sight of her warming his heart.

“Heath, welcome back.”

Taking her outstretched hands, Heath kissed her cheeks and smiled warmly. “Morning, Mrs. Barkley. Thank ya’ for your letter.”

Caressing his cheek, she smiled, “It’s good to see you. Nick’s resting in the parlor.”

“Duke and I have to run into Stockton to take care of a couple details for the trail drive.” replied Heath quietly placing his saddlebags on the table. “I’ll see Nick later.”

Nodding, Victoria walked him to the door. Smiling, she whispered, “I’ve missed you, son.”

Blushing from the term of endearment, Heath flashed a lop-sided grin before leaving the mansion and riding out with the foreman, leaving a dejected brother behind.

Hearing the southern drawl in the foyer caused Nick’s heart to pump furiously, the sound of the voice vibrated softly in his ears. His bruised face scrunched up in pain as he slowly made his way to his feet, standing on his crutches.

Turning to greet his returning brother, the disappointment and loss clearly showed for all to see at the lack of the appearance by Heath. Hanging his head, he fought the despair which shadowed him since his little brother’s departure.

“Nick, he can’t avoid you forever.” said Jarrod quietly. “He’ll be back later.”

“I know, pappy.” sighed Nick sitting on the couch, propping his leg on the table.

Squeezing his shoulder, Audra asked, “Do you want some more coffee, Nick?”

Patting her hand, he shook his head. “Not right now, Audra. Thanks.”

Shooing the other two children out of the parlor, Victoria took Nick’s chin and lifted his pale face upwards. “Heath is still hurt and confused, Nick. He’ll need some time to get over that. His agreeing to handle the drive is a good sign.”

“Mother, I didn’t realize I was hurting him. He trusted me and I let him down. I just want to talk to Heath and explain it. I need him here with me.” whispered Nick, a gasp of pain leaving his lips unwillingly.

Nick shook his head in refusal at the dose of laudanum his mother held out for his pain.

“Nick, you need to get some rest.” stated Victoria firmly. “When Heath comes back, you can talk to him then.”

Relenting and taking the pain medicine, Nick lay on the couch and felt it working its way through his tired and sore body. His eyes drifted shut of their own accord, his breathing steady and even.

Covering him with a blanket, Victoria leaned down and kissed his forehead.

Brushing his hair back, she whispered, “Nick, his eyes are haunted just like yours. Heath’s hurting, too.”

Chapter 41

Heath arrived back at the ranch after lunch. Sending Duke out to check on the cattle, he tied Charger to the hitching rail and entered the house. Putting his hat and gun belt on the round table, hearing sounds in the parlor, he entered the room and walked around to the side of the couch.

Heath’s breath inhaled sharply at the bruises on the face of his brother, his head wrapped in a white bandage, the plastered leg sticking out from the blanket, the wrappings around his ribs could be seen through the half-buttoned shirt.

Nick’s face was covered in a sheen of sweat, his head moving back and forth, mumbled words leaving the thin lips, his mind locked somewhere in his dreams.

“Heath..”

Sitting down on the table beside the couch, Heath was drawn by the unconscious words Nick spoke, parts of phrases clear, others garbled.

“I won’t leave you…in dark”

Heath’s eyes never left his brother’s face, his heart pounding as he eavesdropped, entranced by the memories the words were invoking. Knowing his brother was reliving the terror Heath shared with him in the tunnel.

“Don’t go Heath!”

“HEATH!” shouted Nick flinging his body off the couch, his arm outstretched.

Jumping, Heath grabbed him before he could hit the floor, the extra weight pushing him into a sitting position on the hardwood floor.

“Nick, wake up!” called Heath holding the larger man in his arms. “NICK!”

Opening his eyes slowly, Nick stared at the face peering down at him.

“Heath, you okay?” asked Nick, drugged hazel eyes filled with concern.

Heath nodded, “Fine. You’re the one banged up.”

Confusion showed in Nick’s eyes as he tenderly rubbed his face, “Damn medicine. Makes me fuzzy. I dreamt you were hurt.”

“Ya’ were having a nightmare.” stated Heath helping him off the floor back onto the couch.

“Thanks.” gasped Nick slightly grabbing the blue clothed arm. “Heath, I’m sorry for everything.”

“I’m sure you are, Nick.” gruffed Heath stepping away from the reach of his brother. The remorse in the hazel eyes clear for Heath to see. Staring into Heath’s face, Nick’s stomach lurched from the shutters that were pulled over the pools of blue.

“Did you rebreak anything when you fell off the couch?”

“Don’t think so.” replied Nick.

“Good.”

“Heath, we have..”

“Nick, I came back to head the trail drive. That’s all.” informed Heath firmly. “I got work to do.”

Nick’s calls to his brother were answered by the closing of the front door. Closing his eyes, his body shook with emotion, hands trembling as he raised them to wipe the tears from his cheeks.

Chapter 42

Standing in the doorway of the bunkhouse Duke listened to Heath’s interactions with the ranch crew, explaining the route they were taking on the drive, assigning their responsibilities for the start of the drive the next day. Heath announced he was giving them a night of freedom for the work they’d done over the past week.

“Have a good time tonight, but I expect ya’ at the herd before first light in the morning.” stated Heath.

“If’n we’re late, what are you gonna do? Drive the herd without us?” sneered Barrett.

The men looked from Heath to Barrett waiting for the explosion. Over the past week, Barrett made it clear he preferred Nick to Heath as a boss, his snide remarks about the blonde’s parentage causing the others to start avoiding him. Of all the men in the crew, Barrett was the only one who couldn’t find anything to respect in the new boss.

“If I have to, I will Barrett. But if you want to stay behind, just say the word. Ain’t nobody stopping you from not playing with the big boys.” retorted Heath sarcastically, the crew laughing loudly at the red on the hand’s face.

Nodding to the men, Heath grinned at Duke as he left the bunkhouse. Duke smiled, listening to the others telling Barrett to stop his whining or leave cause they were all sick of him and his mouth.

Heath’s style of leadership was a direct contrast to his brother’s. He posted the duties each day and expected all the men to work as hard as he did. If they did, he’d thank them. If they didn’t, he’d explain the benefits of putting more effort into their work.

Testing the new boss, a few of the men had experienced the benefit talk. It only took one talk before they realized this was not a man who’d take any back sliding, this man could back up his words with fists when necessary. Being a recipient of a ‘benefit talk’ became an inside joke to the crew.

Passing each test the crew put him through earned Heath their respect. When he was at the ranch before, he worked side by side with Nick, Duke or mostly alone. Most of the men hadn’t worked with Heath and were unsure of the newest family member when he stepped in to fill the vacancy created by Nick’s accident.

Throughout the week, a few silently wondered why Heath hadn’t been put in charge of some of the crews when he lived at the ranch before. His obvious knowledge of ranching, the skills he displayed everyday had not gone unseen by the hands. His dedication and foresight shone through in the planning and preparations for the drive.

The crew liked and respected Nick, but found in their new boss another person they could count on and trust. He wouldn’t ask them to do anything he wouldn’t do himself. He’d handle any of the dirtiest jobs without shirking and without complaining.

Long after they were in the bunkhouse for the night, he’d be returning to the ranch late, Heath would finish one of the jobs he wanted done before the two month long drive, knowing Nick would be out of commission and unable to perform the work.

Before anyone else on the ranch had risen to greet the morning, Heath was awake and working for a few hours before breakfast. His self-imposed schedule keeping himself out of the house for most of the past week.

After leaving the bunkhouse, Heath climbed into the loft, grabbed the hammer and completed replacing the last section of the rotten flooring. His movements sure and steady, the rhythmic banging of the hammer reaching Nick’s ears as he made his way to the barn in search of his elusive little brother.

Coming down the ladder, Heath put the hammer and nails away, glancing at Nick leaning on his crutches.

“Evening, Nick.”

“Little brother, everything ready for the drive?” asked Nick.

“Yep.” replied Heath quietly, “Dinner ready?”

“No, not yet. Since I’m able to get around, I was hoping you’d show me the new horses you brought with you.” stated Nick bracing himself for a denial.

“Sure, Nick.” shrugged Heath leading the way outside to the corral.

Hazel eyes gleamed with happiness as Nick hobbled along after Heath. His breathing coming in pants, sweat rolled down his face by the time he stopped beside Heath at the corral bars.

Watching the horses, Heath glanced at Nick out of the corner of his eye. The strain on the tanned face from the exertion causing his heart to twist with worry. Fighting the urge to put a steadying arm around his brother’s shoulders, Heath talked quietly, pointing out the good lines he saw in the horses.

Hearing the familiar voice, a mare walked over to the corral and whinnied. Climbing over the bars, Heath stood talking and petting the animal. The other horses watched from across the corral at the strange interaction between their peer and the human. Giving her a final pat on the neck, Heath climbed out of the corral and jumped down beside Nick.

Nick couldn’t keep his eyes off the horses running and cavorting in the corral. His trained eye knew quality when he saw it.

“Heath, you found all these horses wild behind Strawberry?” asked Nick incredulously. “I’ve never known a herd of wild horses to have so many with good lines in them.”

Heath replied, “Only the mare came from behind Strawberry, Nick. I bought the others last week.”

“You bought them?” inquired Nick staring at the man beside him. “Why?”

Looking up at the sky, Heath debated whether to answer the question. This was not the time or place he’d have chosen, but decided it’d be best to get it out in the open. Now or later, either way his brother wouldn’t like his answer.

“I was leaving to look at a ranch the morning Jarrod came to Strawberry.” admitted Heath, the crestfallen face of his brother looking at him in disbelief.

Finding his voice, Nick stammered, “What ranch? Where were you going?”

“New Pine Creek.”

“OREGON!” exclaimed Nick grabbing the corral bars swaying slightly from the shock.

“Nice country up that way. A man I used to work with wired me about a ranch for sale.”

“You were gonna move to Oregon?” exclaimed Nick. “What about us?”

“I told you before I was only here to handle the trail drive. After it’s done, I’m leaving.”

“Heath, I’d been running the ranch alone without a partner for so long, well, there’s just no excuse for my behavior. I know you tried to tell me and I didn’t listen. Don’t leave without giving us another try, little brother.” pleaded Nick, desperation quivering his voice.

“Nick, it doesn’t matter..”

“Yes, it does matter, Heath! Promise me you’ll come back here after the drive, we’ll talk and work things out.” urged Nick. “Promise me you won’t buy another ranch.”

Heath stated quietly, “No, I can’t promise that.”

“CAN’T OR WON’T?” yelled Nick anger deepening his voice, the impending loss sending his emotions reeling in a downward spiral.

Staring into the flaring hazel eyes, Heath took a breath to calm the fury he felt building inside. His hands clenched, his back rigid, the words low and cold, ice hanging from them when they left his mouth.

“It took me a long time to trust you, Nick. But it sure as hell didn’t take long for you to destroy it. You broke your promise and went back on your word. If you think I’m gonna let you do that to me again, YOU’RE LOCO!”

Turning on his heel, Heath walked to the house without a backwards glance.

Chapter 43

Jarrod stood at the french doors, watching Nick looking up into the cloudy, starless night sky. Pouring two drinks, he walked out and handed one to his brother.

“Thanks.”

“You waiting for rain, Nick?” teased Jarrod.

“No, just thinking.” replied Nick sipping on the brandy.

Turning his eyes to the sky, Jarrod smiled slightly, “Do you suppose Heath’s looking up at the stars tonight?”

Sighing deeply, Nick looked over, “Remember when we went to the lodge that weekend?”

Nodding, Jarrod smiled, “Like it was yesterday, Nick. We sure had a good time.”

Chuckling, Nick grinned “Yeah, we did.”

Walking over and sitting on the bench under the gazebo, Nick waited until Jarrod sat across from him. Leaning his elbows on his knees and holding the glass in his hands, Nick smiled.

“Heath was sure excited about that trip. Hell, he strung more words together on the ride up there than I’d ever heard him say before.”

“He sure talked our ears off.” smiled Jarrod tenderly. “Remember when he saw the lodge for the first time?”

“I thought he was gonna fall off his horse!” Laughing and leaning back, Nick wiped at his eyes, “He was so shocked at the size of it. He kept calling it the Barkley Hotel, so Gene pretended to be the desk clerk and bell hop! Making this big production out of showing him to his room and carrying in his luggage. His saddlebags!”

Jarrod stammered through his laughter, “When we went fishing, Gene took out the newest rod and reel, bragging about all the fish he was gonna catch. Heath laughed til he fell on the ground and couldn’t catch his breath when Gene got all tangled up in the line. Tears ran down Heath’s face when you and I had to cut Gene loose.”

“Then Heath pulls out a string and a hook, catches all these fish and drawls ‘I think these fish like the old way, college boy.’ Gene was so mad he pushed Heath in the lake, fish and all.” grinned Nick.

“Then Heath gets this innocent boy look on his face, water dripping off him, soaked to the skin and suggests Gene fish with dynamite the next day instead of his fancy rod and reel.” chuckled Jarrod. “Poor Gene! Now he has three older brothers to torture him.”

“We had a great time up there, talking and laughing. Just being basically lazy.” admitted Nick with a wide smile.

“After you and Gene would go to sleep, Heath and I’d sit on the steps of the porch. He’d roll a cigarette and stare at the sky while he smoked it, sometimes pointing out certain stars to me.”

“You didn’t tell me that.” smiled Jarrod taking in the hazel eyes looking back in fond remembrance.

“He knows all the constellations, Jarrod. Imagine that! A kid who wasn’t allowed to stay in school past the second grade knows the constellations of the stars. I don’t know the constellations and I graduated high school!” snorted Nick. “Heath sure is full of surprises, ain’t he?”

Both brothers sat lost in their own thoughts of time spent with their unique blonde brother. Good times and bad times. The journey from it’s explosive starting point to their current haphazard position.

“Two more weeks left on the drive, Jarrod.” stated Nick quietly breaking the silence around them. “Two more weeks, then we’ll know if we’re gonna lose our little brother because of me.”

“Nick, stop beating yourself up.” admonished Jarrod. “You’re not the only brother who could have done a better job.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I was there too. I saw what was happening but thought you needed to work it out between yourselves. I should have taken you aside, but I didn’t and now look where we are.” stated Jarrod bitterly, angry at himself for the misdirection he had taken in his role as older brother.

“Should have, could have, would have.” smiled Nick looking up into Jarrod’s puzzled expression. “Heath told me once at the lodge..

‘Nick, wishes are for those who want the world handed to them on a silver platter. You can’t change things with wishes. You can’t go back in time. I don’t want the world or anything else handed to me. I’m a working man who’ll work and be satisfied with a small piece of land, a good horse and a full belly as I sit in front of the fire.’

“Jarrod, I offered him the world of the Barkley ranch. When I sit here and remember him saying, ‘Okay, Nick’, I can feel the same excitement and feelings, I had the day he agreed to come back to the ranch. I offered him hope and a future, then when he got here I took it all away and left him with nothing.”

The silence gathered around the two saddened brothers in the velvety darkness of the night.

Frowning, Jarrod sipped his brandy, his thoughts nagging at him. “Nick, do you recall when during those two months things between you two got rocky?

“Yeah.”

“Remember all the shouting, the heated words and the fights you two had? During this time, did Heath have any nightmares?” asked Jarrod quietly.

Thinking back, Nick shook his head and stated firmly, “No, none. I would’ve heard them.”

Leaning forward, Jarrod smiled widely. “Interesting, isn’t it Nick?”

Sitting up suddenly, Nick grinned and exclaimed, “It sure is, Pappy!”

Chapter 44

The dust from the hooves of the large herd rose in the air and settled down on everything in its wake. The walking beeves kept on track by the persistent cowboys, riding their steeds, capturing those looking for freedom and directing them back to the safety of the group. This simple play being shown on all sides of the herd, each day, every hour.

Following a mossy horned bull, the protest from playing pied piper rose up from the beasts of many colors, filling the air with their sounds. The two legged upright beasts responded back with shouts and curses, a taste of ropes across their backs and rumps, encouraging a forward movement.

Onward they marched, unheeding of the day of the week, unheeding of the week of the month, forging their way to the unknown destination. Stopping at night, having their fill of cool stream water, milling around in a large mass. Singing voices could be heard in the night air, soothing in their ears as the humans circled the mass of horns and hooves, keeping them calm, safe and together.

The crew of men and their leader knew how lucky they had been so far. The weather had been cooperative, the streams full of water, the grass plentiful on their trail. The answer to the wires sent by Heath before leaving Stockton had proved to hold truth so far. Sending telegraphs to people he had met or worked for over the years, to inquire about the trail conditions was one step in his preparation, he felt was a wise move.

One could use the knowledge gained for their benefit, experience the environment when they arrived in it and adjust their plans accordingly to what was found. Knowing when you could reach a dry spot was helpful. Knowing if a stream was lower than normal for the time of year was helpful. Knowing if rivers were higher than normal was helpful.

Of course, a trail drive itself held a varying degree of risk. No one could fully prepare for every contingency. A trail drive was unsure as life, there was nothing set in stone. A trail drive could be as unforgiving as a scorned woman and dangerous as a poised rattler. You could only push on and keep alert to everything around you, changing and adapting when necessary.

The cattle, crew and the ranch were dependent on the leader of the drive for the tenacity, guts, motivation, will and strength to see it through to the very end. The leader was the glue that held the crew together under the strenuous, dangerous and tiresome conditions. Loss of respect for the leader would bring the drive to a halt, the men to leave and all to be lost.

Duke rode beside Heath and rode proudly. Heath earned the respect of the crew and worked hard to keep it that way. He conversed with the crew, ate with them, slept with them, disciplined the crew and worked the dreaded drag with them. He took a night watch shift, scouted trails, chased down strays and kept an eye on all his crew members.

Sitting and drinking his coffee, Duke wondered where Barrett was since Heath fired him on the spot for drinking four days before. Glancing at Heath across the fire, the bruises still reflected on the blonde’s face from the brawl with the bigger man.

Barrett stumbled slightly on his way to the fire after his watch, Heath’s face turned to stone from the smell of whiskey on the man. The crew watched intently when Heath stood before Barrett, his cold words ringing through the silence for all to hear.

“Barrett, drinking on the drive is not allowed. Pack your gear and get out or I’ll do it for you.”

Sneering, Barrett laughed, “You and what army, bastard.”

“I don’t need any help, Barrett. You’ve been wanting a piece of me for some time now, well, here I am.” stated Heath calmly.

Looking in the icy blue eyes, Barrett felt a shiver run down his spine while the anger in him rose, his thoughts careless. ‘This bastard actually thinks he can take me. I’ll show him.’

Nodding in agreement, Barrett swung his arm slicing the air where the blonde’s head was. Seeing the punch coming, Heath ducked and connected with Barrett’s stomach, taking the air out of the other man. Growling with fury, Barrett jumped and pushed Heath back onto the hard packed ground.

Rolling over, the crew scrambled out of the way forming a circle around the two combatants. Fists and feet flew, sounds of flesh hitting flesh rang through the camp, blood poured off each man, bruises forming, breaths were coming in ragged gasps from fury being unleashed.

Barrett was losing and that knowledge had him drawing his gun. Shouting a warning, Duke reached for his pistol, his hand stopping when a knife entered Barrett’s gun arm. Screaming in pain, the gun dropped from Barrett’s hand, his other trying to close over the bloody wound around the knife projecting from it.

Wiping his face with his sleeve, Heath picked up the dropped gun and pulled his knife out of Barrett’s arm, eliciting a string of curses from the pale man that could curdle milk.

“Bandage him up Duke, then, see that he rides out.” stated Heath coldly.

Duke shouted out the orders, a couple men gathered Barrett’s gear and put it on his horse. Escorting the terminated hand to his horse, Duke and two others mounted and lead Barrett away into the night.

Jacob grabbed a canteen and a towel. Gesturing for Heath to sit, he cleaned his face and bandaged what he could. “All done, boss. Not as good as a fancy doctor, but it’ll do.”

“Thanks, Jacob. You men best get some sleep.” ordered Heath quietly, the pain from the fight already starting to reveal themselves.

“It was a good fight, boss.” admitted Jacob putting away the items.

“Barrett don’t hit nearly as hard as Nick.” admits Heath with a slight grin, receiving nods of agreement from several crew members.

Laughing amongst themselves, the crew settled down on their bedrolls, admiration and respect for the boss, fully intact. Heath’s handling of the situation was exactly how their other boss, Nick, would have handled it.

Chapter 45

Two weeks were left in the drive and Heath put in extra time to alleviate the burden on the crew caused by his firing of Barrett. Duke watched Heath say some last words to the men before making his way out of camp on his nightly ritual.

Each night, Heath walked away from the firelight, into the shadows, after the guards had been dispersed to the herd for the first watch.

Each night, Heath sat away from the rest of the crew, alone with his thoughts for a brief period of time.

Each night, Heath went over the upcoming trail in his mind for the next day’s progress.

Each night, Heath thought of each of the family back in Stockton, wondering how they had spent their day, what were they doing at that moment in time.

Each night, Heath’s guilt grew thinking of leaving behind the family he realized was firmly encased in his heart.

Each night, Heath looked within himself to find the answers, frustrated when he only found uncertainty and doubt.

Each night, Heath would look to the stars, smoke a cigarette and wait for the answer to make itself known.

Each night, no answers were forthcoming.

Until tonight. Tonight, the answer found him.

It was if the darkness he had blanketed around himself was lifted and replaced with a kaleidoscope of colors. Brilliant, shimmering and blinding. Bursting in the darkened sky like a fireworks display on independence day. A multitude of colors abound, brightening everything in the area.

A feeling of lightness filled him, uncertainty replaced with sureness, doubt replaced with hope, a frown replaced with a smile.

Grinding the stub of cigarette into the ground, Heath walked back into camp and took out a pad of paper from his saddlebags. Leaning against his saddle, he wrote with a pencil in the flickering firelight. Finishing, he put the papers in an envelope and addressed it. Tucking the letter in his shirt pocket, he lay down and fell asleep looking at the stars.

Chapter 46

Nick stared at the envelope addressed to him, turning it over in his hands, afraid of the contents housed inside. The name of his little brother written in the corner. Looking at the expectant faces of his family, Nick turned and walked up the grand staircase to his room, steps slow and methodical.

Closing the door, he set the letter carefully on his table and sat on the side of his bed. His hazel eyes burned with trepidation, staring at the envelope as if afraid it were about to bite like a rattlesnake or sting like a scorpion. Standing, he paced the length of his room, his hands stuffed in the back pockets of his jeans, his eyes unwillingly drawn to the rectangle of white beckoning him.

Suddenly Nick’s pacing stopped and he chuckled to himself, shaking his head at his hesitancy and lack of courage to open an ordinary white envelope.

“You’ll never know if you don’t read it.” his baritone voice whispering the words in the quiet room.

Tentatively picking up the letter, he carefully opened the envelope and pulled out the papers. Sitting on the bed, he took a great breath of air and slowly exhaled. With shaky fingers, he unfolded the sheets and stared at the words on the first page.

Nick,

Okay.

Heath.

His heart pounded, his stomach jumped into his throat, his mind set for denial slowly comprehended the one word answer, his vision reduced down to the one word leaping out from the page.

“YES!!” shouted Nick throwing open his door and flying down the stairs to the parlor. “YES! JARROD!!”

“HE SAID OKAY!” yelled Nick to his startled family as he slid to a stop on the hardwood floor. Jarrod whooped loudly for joy, jumped up and grabbed his brother in a gigantic hug.

Both brothers were talking at once, the excitement permeating the air of the gigantic house, their words tumbled out, their smiles lighting up the room taking away the darkness surrounding them.

Audra and Victoria looked at each other puzzled.

“What are you talking about, Nick?” inquired Victoria. “Who said okay?”

“Heath said okay, Mother! He’s coming back after the drive so we can talk and work things out.” exclaimed Nick.

Handing the top page to her, Victoria shared it with Audra, neither fully understanding how Nick and Jarrod knew what Heath was relaying based on the single word ‘okay’.

“That’s wonderful news!” smiled Victoria, deciding to not dwell on the how or why of the one word message, letting the news warm her heart and further brightened her gray eyes.

“What’s that other page, Nick?” asked Audra smiling widely at the happiness overtaking the recent sadness reflecting in Nick and Jarrod’s faces.

“I didn’t read it yet. Guess I’m a little excited.” grinned Nick reading the words on the paper out loud to his grinning family.

Nick,

Had to fire Barrett for drinking on the job. We’re one hand short, but making good time. By the time you read this we should be headed back.

Give my best to the family.

Heath

P.S. Remember when we fought over stacking the feedbags? Can you guess now why I moved them to the other side of the loft? Just realized I forgot to tell you. Sorry for the broke leg you got cause of it.

“When did you fight about that, Nick?” asked Audra searching her memory for the specific incident, saddened at how many she could bring to mind.

“That’s the last argument we had when Heath left the first time. I thought he was just ignoring my orders. I didn’t give him a chance to explain, as usual, I jumped all over him.” frowned Nick, remembering the scene angry word for angry word, fist for fist.

Victoria nodded and sighed, “I remember. It seems like such a long time ago.”

Clapping Nick on the back, Jarrod grinned, “This is great news, Nick.”

“It’s the best news I’ve ever received, pappy.” smiled Nick widely.

Nodding in agreement, Jarrod looked into the hazel eyes intensely, “What are we gonna do to ensure our little brother stays with us for the rest of our lives brother Nick?”

Chapter 47

Ranch hand.

Cowboy.

Drover.

Whatever term you choose to use, really doesn’t matter all that much, the life of all three is a hard and dangerous one. They are individuals, although in their chosen trade, they worked as one with other members of their cohesive unit.

They depended on the other members of their units to watch their backs, hold up their share of the work and in turn, entrusted the others with their lives. Much like a soldier of one within a platoon, within a division, within an army.

Many hazards were entwined with the job of a ranch hand. This was the reality of their trade. There were hidden risks associated with the tasks they performed everyday.

They could lose a finger if it got coiled in a rope, they could lose an arm or leg from working out on the range away from medical attention.

Their limbs, backs and necks could be broken when thrown from a horse.

Their foot could get caught in a stirrup, leaving them dragging in a slow agonizing death.

They could catch a bullet from a rustler or run across a four legged predator.

Any of these hazards could happen at any time, but a ranch hand accepted it as part of their job. These things were not dwelled upon. These things were as they had always been and would always be in the future.

When you worked in wild country with ornery beasts, wild animals and wild men – it was expected.

To their credit, the men in this chosen trade were hardened, but surprisingly, not hard. They were loyal, but not loyal to a fault. They rode for the brand and the owner of the brand. If in their estimation the owner was not worthy of respect, the cowboy would leave, preventing the unworthiness of reaching down and tainting him.

If you observed a night fire ringed with ranch hands, you would be surprised, maybe even shocked. They were comedians, storytellers, singer, composers, teachers, musicians and poets.

They were all manner of men, similar in their manner of dress, but not all the same. They came from different backgrounds and for different reasons had decided cowboying was the trade for them.

However, there was one certain thing which could put fear into even the most stalwart of cowboys.

Mother Nature….she was untamed and wild, unchecked in her anger, lashing out to all around her.

She could send a tornado to chase you across open plains.

She could pelt you with hail larger than your fist.

She could steal away the water you needed to survive.

She could send a blinding snow storm down, cutting off your route of escape, freezing you in your tracks.

She could catch you in a rushing river of water intermingled with floating debris.

Three days to go on the drive and she was coming at them like a rushing freight train, screaming in her fury, shooting daggers from her eyes, throwing things to crash against a wall.

Looking at the upcoming horizon, Duke and Heath felt the sliver of fear work it’s way into their wildly beating hearts. Mother Nature was sending them a gift of rain, lightning and thunder.

She was coming and nothing would stop her.

Galloping back to the crew and herd, the two men split away, as if their game plan had been discussed before hand. Taking opposites sides of the herd, both men rode up and down the line shouting orders to the men. The crew put on their slickers in preparation for the upcoming battle and the wild wide Mother Nature was promising.

The cattle sensed the change in the air, the increase of electricity, the approach of something frightening. As one, they shifted in their nervousness, calves bawling to their mothers, mothers mooing out in fright.

Men gathered around the mass, trying to keep them from bursting apart at the seams, trying to keep a large busted woman in a dress two sizes too small.

The strain was felt on man and beasts as the imminent approached, the hairs on their neck prickling from the charge in the air, the first drops of rain were large and only a preclude of what was to come. Scattering drops fell, dark circles reflected on the ground. Then, the clouds let loose a torrential downpour, driven by the gusting winds.

Singing, the men raised their voices, shouting above the wind to reach the ears of the quivering beasts, hoping against hope to still the fear, men and beasts each held in their hearts.

A single bolt flashing from the sky signified the start of the race.

Chapter 48

In the driving rain, flashing of lightning and roaring thunder, hooves pounded on the wet ground. The white eyes of the beasts could be seen as men chased the cattle engulfed in a mad frenzied dash headed away from the lightning and thunder.

A stampede in the dark, over unfamiliar territory, was something no one would wish on even their worst enemy. The rain pounding on the faces of the ranch hands was tuned out, their exhaustion from the long drive, their aching bodies forgotten in their desire to cease the senseless running by the large beasts.

Horses were pushed to the limits of their muscles, the peak of their endurance stretched further by the urging whip of reins against their flank, the turning of the mass of horns and hooves, the end goal they were seeking with their human partners.

Leaning forward, Heath and Jacob galloped past the cattle making steady progress to the open space in front of the running mass. Using the speed of their horses, shouts and waving stetsons, the leader turned ever so slightly. The men urged him on and the mossy horned bull turned, heading back to the area it was sprinting from, the others followed their leader in the pied piper game ending the out-of-control running.

Thirty minutes had passed before the boss and crew were able to get the frightened cattle settled down. The rain had diminished, the temper tantrum of Mother Nature passed over them on it’s way to terrify someone else.

Riding up beside the foreman, Heath reined in, “Duke, any one hurt or missing?”

“Jacob, Tom and Dave.” stated Duke. “Jacob got a broken arm when his horse stumbled after you got the herd turned.”

Looking into the older man’s eyes, Heath asked quietly, “The others?”

“No sign of them, Heath. We’ll keep looking.” sighed Duke, the pained blue eyes looking away from him.

It took over two months of saddle sitting, screaming muscles, excruciating exhaustion to reach the end of the trail drive. It only took one week of riding the rails to return back to the point of origin.

Stockton, California.

Not all members of the crew returned. This was the fall drive and like other ranches in the area, most of the men would depart to return in the spring. The chuck wagon and the remuda would be returning to the ranch next week.

Jumping down the steps of the train, Heath waited for Duke and the others before heading over to the wagon bearing the Barkley name.

“Great to have you fellows back!” grinned Nick shaking the hands of the returning men. “Ciego will buy you a couple rounds before you head back to the ranch!”

The men looked towards Heath and he smiled slightly, “I’ll see you fellows later at the ranch. Go on, git!”

Clapping him on the back, they followed Ciego to the saloon eager to partake in the free rounds. Talking loudly as they walked, boasting about the fine job they’d done on the trail.

Nick held out his hand and smiled, “Welcome home, Heath.”

Heath flashed a lop-sided grin, gripping the extended limb in a firm grip, “Nick. How are things on the ranch?”

Directing Heath to the saddled horses, Nick looked over and shrugged, “Progressing.”

“Progressing?” repeated Heath a frown gracing his handsome face as he mounted.

“On the way home, how about if we stop by the Henderson’s. They have a couple horses to look at.” suggested Nick turning Coco down the street.

Puzzled by the earlier comment, Heath nodded absently, “Yeah, sure Nick.”

‘Progressing? What does that mean?’ wondered Heath confused at the choice of words.

“Heath?”

“Yeah?”

“What happened to Jacob’s arm?” asked Nick his question drawing Heath back to the present.

“Three days to go and a major storm blows in. He was thrown in a stampede and broke it.” explained Heath stopping Charger, looking at the reins held in his fingers. “Tom and Dave didn’t make it out of the stampede. We buried them where they lay. Their personal effects are coming back in the chuckwagon.”

Sighing deeply, Nick nodded. “We’ll see their next of kin get their effects and send their pay to them.”

“Okay, Nick.” stated Heath quietly nudging Charger forward.

“Hey, Nick, who are the Hendersons?”

Chapter 49

“What’s the matter?” asked Nick puzzled at the reaction from the brother he dearly wanted to please.

Staring at the skeleton of the building, Heath gruffed, “What is that?”

“You said you wanted somewhere to train horses. I thought this was a good spot.” stated Nick calmly.

“Nick.” Heath rubbed the back of his neck, clearly agitated at the sight before him.

“What? I thought this is what you wanted. You said you wanted someplace quiet and less stressful to train the horses.” explained Nick trying to keep a rein on his temper. “What’s wrong with it?”

Walking away, Heath leaned on a section of post, he took off his hat and wiped the sweat band. Taking a deep breath, he turned, walked back and stood in front of the bewildered man.

“Nick, why did you start building this?” inquired Heath quietly.

Disbelief spread across the tanned face, hazel eyes squinted at the blond across from him, the voice of the man clearly loaded with exasperation. “Because it’s what you wanted!”

“It is not what I wanted. It was what I suggested would be helpful to train horses, Nick.” said Heath calmly.

“I don’t believe you!” snapped Nick.

Heath calmly repeated his question, “Why did you start building this?”

“So you could train horses like you said before you left!” retorted Nick.

“I see.” sighed Heath. “So when you said things at the ranch were progressing, you were talking about this building and corrals?”

“Partly.” admitted Nick hesitantly.

Heath stared into the hazel orbs, “What do ya’ mean partly?”

Shrugging, Nick cleared his throat, “There’s, uh, other things progressing. This is a working ranch!”

Sighing deeply, Heath rolled his eyes, “Would these other things by chance have to do with the south basin and a new crop?”

“They might have something, uh, to do with it.” stated Nick sheepishly.

“Nick, why would you do that?” asked Heath, his voice low and beseeching. “Tell me why.”

Waving his black leathered hands, Nick’s voice could be heard miles around, “WHY? I DON’T UNDERSTAND YOU. THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED.”

“NICK, THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED.”

“IT IS TOO! I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID!”

“WHY, NICK? WHY?”

“BECAUSE I DON’T WANT YOU TO LEAVE AGAIN. THERE! THAT’S WHY!

Nick’s face clouded over, hurt shown in his hazel eyes from the laughter coming from the blond. Heath saw the look in the eyes and put a consoling arm across the broad shoulders, shaking his head.

“Nick, you are really something else.” smirked Heath.

Pushing the younger man away from him, Nick growled, “What do you mean by that!”

“Nick.” grinned Heath, blue eyes dancing with merriment. “Do you think just cause you acted on a couple suggestions, this would keep me here?”

“In your letter, you said okay.” stammered Nick. “You were coming back to work it out.”

“I meant what I wrote in the letter, Nick.” assured Heath seeing the tension leaving the larger man, stopping his words with a raised hand.

“I don’t want you to do things cause you afraid I’ll leave if I don’t get my way. That’s not a partnership. That’s blackmail. If it doesn’t make sense or benefit the ranch, tell me. I want us to be able to discuss ideas and suggestions. That’s all. That’s all I’m asking, Nick.” explained Heath.

“Oh.” replied Nick. “Guess I went a little overboard.”

“Nick, do you think having a separate area to train horses would be beneficial to the Barkley ranch?”

“Yes, I do. The way you train horses is different, Heath. They’re ready to ride sooner and trust people. That’ll help with filling our contracts.”

“Then, I thank you for the new training area, Nick.” grinned Heath extending his hand.

Smiling, Nick nodded and grabbed the hand. “You’re welcome. Let’s go home.”

Walking to the horses, they climbed into the saddles and Nick looked over to his right, “I’m glad you’re back, Heath.”

“Thanks, Nick.”

Chapter 50

Heath rode beside his older brother as the afternoon slowly dwindled away. Nick spent the time updating his returning brother on the events which occurred in the last two months while he was on the trail drive. Dismounting at the barn, the two led their companions into the barn, unsaddled and groomed them.

Nick waited outside the stall watching Heath groom Charger, his movements sure and quick. Charger was reveling in the extra grooming his master treated him to.

“Heath, ain’t you done yet?” groaned Nick leaning on the stall door.

“Boy howdy, what’s the hurry?” inquired Heath continuing his combing.

“Silas is making beef roast tonight.” stated Nick rubbing his stomach in anticipation.

“Well, go on to the house, I’ll be right behind you shortly.” suggested Heath.

Shaking his head, Nick snorted, “NO WAY! Mother and Audra’ll scratch my eyes out if you’re not with me.”

Heath chuckled at the image of Nick being attached by the women of the family, “A few more minutes, Nick.”

“Five more and that’s it!” growled Nick sitting on a hay bale with his arms crossed. Watching the cowboy and his steed, Nick smiled, thinking of getting used to this nightly ritual with his brother.

Grooming his horse was done for two reasons to Heath. One of course was for the benefit of the horse, the other was for the benefit of Heath. He benefited from the trust the animal held in him and from this simple activity which in the past helped him gather his thoughts.

On the trail when he had found the answer to his question and decided to return to the ranch, Heath’s thoughts of his new family warmed the dark recesses of his heart and soul.

On the train ride back, he thought of how much seeing Mrs. Barkley and feeling her caress his cheek created an ache within him. He had questions he needed answers to, he had feelings he needed to express to Mrs. Barkley. Feelings which told him she was his Mother as much as his birth mother.

Only the love of a mother is without strings.

Only the love of a mother is unconditional.

Only the love of a mother was felt in the comfort she offered him.

Only the love of a mother had ever created such an ache within him.

He was startled out of his thoughts by the deep voice, “Heath, time’s up!”

Rolling his eyes, Heath put the curry comb away and stepped out of the stall. “Okay, Nick.”

“I called your name three times. What were you thinking about?” asked Nick walking beside Heath to the mansion.

“Just wondering if Silas made a big enough roast from the hurry you’re in.” teased Heath keeping his thoughts hidden.

“Very funny.” mumbled Nick slowing his pace unconsciously.

Heath noticed the slowing and smiled to himself. He had really wanted to ask, ‘Nick, would it be okay if I call your mother, Mother?’ He had stopped the words from leaving his mouth, stopped by the hesitation welling up inside.

Stopped by the fear of possible rejection.

Stopped by the fear of stepping fully into the life he would be working to build with his new family.

Stopped by the fear of diminishing his own mother with the act.

Stopped by the fear of his mother who loving raised him perhaps not understanding from where she watched above.

Stopped by the question in his head, ‘Do you have the right?’.

Chapter 51

Never did Heath ever imagine his return into the mansion would not be the peaceful, heartwarming scene he envisioned in his mind on the trip back.

Stepping through the oak door, he felt as if he were outside his body, looking down into the depths of hell, the eyes of Satan seeing through to his weak soul.

Leaping at the man, he saw his hands gripping the exposed throat as he sought the jugular, visions of horrors flashing through his mind.

Nick and Jarrod jumped on Heath after his catlike pounce and growl of outrage. Victoria and Audra stood stunned at the fury and murderous look on the blonde’s face.

His homecoming dinner forgotten from the scene being played out before them. Pulling Heath back, Jarrod and Nick held onto his arms while their lumber foreman gasped for air and climbed slowly to his feet.

“That’s Matt Bentell!” shouted Heath fighting the hold his brothers placed on him.

Jarrod and Nick stared at the man, Heath’s words ringing in their ears, glanced over at their mother and sister. Shock showing on their mother’s face, fright on Audra’s from her brother’s actions.

“GET OUT!” yelled Nick. “LEAVE!”

Grabbing his hat, Toddman stumbled and left through the great oak door. Jarrod and Nick held onto Heath, afraid to let him go, afraid Heath would bolt out the door after Bentell.

The brothers’ minds were equally stunned by the scene and violence they had just witnessed, stunned by the mild man who was the warden in the hellhole of a prison, stunned by the fury in the mild man’s eyes when his double life was exposed by their little brother.

The rage slowly left Heath, his body shaking from the expulsion of adrenaline, his mind going between visions of Carterson and thoughts of his new family’s acquaintance with the man of his darkest, most terrifying nightmares. Feeling his brothers release their grips, Heath stumbled to the fireplace and grabbed the large mantle with both hands.

His gasps of air slowing into regular breaths, his back feeling the sting of lashes he received years ago, his head pounding from the rapid rise of blood pressure he’d been subjected to.

Spinning around, he shouted, “You know Bentell and you didn’t tell me!”

The accusation and repulsion in his voice rang out to his family, the words cutting through to their hearts. Heath’s face speaking loud and clear to them, pale complexion, blue terrified eyes, sweat forming on his forehead. His clenched hands with whitened knuckles hung at his sides.

“Heath, we didn’t know he was Bentell.” assured Victoria stepping towards him, seeing him step back slightly, stopped her abruptly. “He told us his name was Toddman.”

“If we’d known, we wouldn’t have hired him, Heath.” said Jarrod quietly. “We didn’t know who he really was.”

Nick started towards Heath, intent on standing beside him. Heath backed away, unsure of what to do, where to go, who to trust. Nick’s eyes took in the terror filled blue ones, looking for a way out, the same look he’d seen in the office of Dr. Martin so long ago.

“Heath, trust me.” stated Nick quietly, the statement loud in the quiet parlor.

Heath’s backward steps faltered and stopped at the words, his eyes locked with the hazel ones, blocking out everyone else in the room.

“I don’t. I can’t. Bentell is..” stammered Heath old resurrected panic squeezing his throat. “Nick..”

“I won’t leave you in the dark, Heath. I promise.” urged Nick his words reaching through the panic and confusion.

Stepping over to his little brother, Nick caught him as his legs gave out from the horrendous emotional shock. Nick wrapped his arms around the trembling man, whispering in his ear, promising a light to help him see through the darkness.

Heath entwined his fists in the back of Nick’s shirt, grateful for the strong arms holding him, fighting the despair from overtaking and drowning him. Jarrod encased his arms around his sister and mother, both women trembling in his hold.

Heath let Nick support him while they walked out of the room and up the grand staircase. Entering Heath’s room, Nick set him on the bed and shut the door. Heath’s eyes were closed, fighting the visions he’d shut out over the past months.

“Heath, look at me.” ordered Nick quietly waiting for the blue eyes to open.

“Nick.” whispered Heath shame rising in him. “I scared Audra and Mother. I wasn’t thinking, I didn’t know what I was doing. I’m sorry, they shouldn’t have seen that.”

Grabbing the back of his neck, Nick replied firmly, “You don’t have anything to be sorry for. He does, not you! Remember that, little brother!”

Heath looked up at the knock on the door and Nick called out, “Who is it?”

“It’s Mother.” replied Victoria opening the door at Heath’s shaky invitation.

Sitting on the bed, Victoria caressed Heath’s cheek, looking into his blue eyes while she requested Nick make sure their former guest and employee was escorted off Barkley land.

Leaving to do his Mother’s bidding, Nick glanced at Heath before departing, “I’ll be back in a little while, Heath. Don’t leave.”

“Okay, Nick.” whispered Heath.

Chapter 52

Walking into the parlor, Nick hugged his beautiful sister, “Are you okay, honey?”

“I’m fine, Nick.” smiled Audra. “It’s Heath I’m worried about, Nick. What an awful shock for him. How is he? ”

“He’ll be okay. Mother’s up there right now.” stated Nick. “Where’s Jarrod?”

Pointing towards the door, Audra’s eyes filled with pride, “He said he was going to escort Mr. Bentell off the ranch personally.”

Smiling, Nick kissed her cheek, “I’m gonna see if he needs any help.”

Grabbing his hat, Nick walked out into the early evening air meeting his older brother coming towards the house. “Jarrod, I thought you were escorting Bentell off the ranch.”

“I can’t find him Nick.” replied Jarrod, eyes filled with worry.

“What do you mean you can’t find him? Any one see him leave?” growled Nick angrily.

“No one saw him come out of the house. Duke has the men searching the range for him. I gave them orders to make sure he left Barkley range when they found him.” sighed Jarrod.

Frowning, Nick shook his head, “Dammit, I shoulda made sure he left after we found out his real name."

“Let’s look around the ranch again, Nick. Maybe you’ll see something I didn’t, like a missing horse.” suggested Jarrod.

“Pappy, if you spent more time with me and the horses you’d know how many we have.” teased Nick walking beside his older brother.

“I’ll have to clear my calendar to fit in you and your dates.” shot back Jarrod. “Nick, is Heath alright?”

“I gotta tell you Jarrod, I thought he was gonna run on us again. I could see it in his eyes. That boy’s had it hard. It’s not right, everything he’s had to suffer in his lifetime. The thought of losing him scares the hell outta me.” admitted Nick, dark thoughts deepening his hazel eyes.

Jarrod squeezed Nick’s shoulder and stated calmly, “We’re not gonna lose him, Nick. We’re standing by him and that will make all the difference.”

The brothers continued their search of the ranch buildings while Victoria was looking into the blue eyes of her newest son.

“This wasn’t exactly a happy homecoming, was it?” asked Victoria softly.

Staring at his stepmother, Heath felt the corners of his mouth turn up slightly, “No, guess not Mrs. Barkley.”

Cupping his left cheek in her palm, she smiled, “Heath, we would never knowingly cause you pain. You are so important to all of us.”

“I’m sorry I accused you like that.” sighed Heath shame and guilt seen in his twin mirrors. “I just never thought I’d walk in the door and see him. I’m sorry for scaring you and Audra.”

Victoria had witnessed the nightmares the past created in this gentle souled man after his injuries in the earthquake. The nightmares had terrified her and the others in the family as much as him.

“If we had known who he was from the beginning, he’d never have been allowed to set foot on this ranch.” stated Victoria firmly. “Do you believe that in your heart, Heath?”

Heath stood up and walked to the window. Staring out with unseeing eyes, Victoria waited patiently, sensing his desire to gather his tumbling thoughts in a set order.

Heath stood locked in his thoughts, thinking of this woman small in stature but larger than life in her love and compassion. Heath knew the anger within him would never fully be extinguished. He knew he couldn’t leave his family. He knew he had to try to explain the ache deep within him.

“I believe it, Mrs. Barkley. When I was on the trail drive, every night I’d sit and search for the answer to different questions. Should I come back to the ranch? Why go back? Would it be different this time?”

Shaking his head, he turned around and looked at his stepmother, “I’ve been so unsettled in my life, so lonely, always searching for something. My mama, Aunt Rachel and Hannah were wonderful to me. When I first figured out there were differences between my family and others, I remembered mama telling me when I was little, ‘Families come in all different sizes, honey. Someday you’ll have a different sized family that will love you, no matter what. You’ll see.’”

Surprise and curiosity reflected on Victoria’s face from Leah’s statement to her boy. She sat and listened as he continued in a gentle, quiet voice.

“I always assumed she meant when I’d marry as an adult. Then one night on the trail, it suddenly became clear to me when I heard her whisper those words in my ear again. I knew at that moment, this was the family she was speaking of when I was growing up.”

“Your mother was right, Heath. We do love you, no matter what.” assured Victoria. “We will always be here for you.”

“I know, but I can’t help feel, well, guilty. My past shouldn’t affect you and the others. It’s not right or fair to any of you.”

“Heath, we’re family. We love each other and what affects one of us, affects us all.” Walking over she held onto his hand. “You’re part of this family, a big part of it. Don’t feel as if you have to hide your past from us. We won’t think any less of you. Remember you have us in your heart, to get you through difficult times. It may be hard for all of us, but that’s what family members do for each other.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Barkley.” mumbled Heath squeezing her hand.

Kissing his cheek, Victoria walked to the door. Stopping, she looked back, “Heath, I have the deepest respect for your mother. I would never in any way belittle her or try to take her place in your heart. I love you and I hope you will consider calling me, Mother. If you need time to think about it or you don’t feel comfortable, I’ll understand.”

A lop-sided grin flashed quickly, happiness spread across his face and in his heart as he stepped closer to her, “I don’t need to think about it any more. I know in my heart you love me as much as my mama. I’d be honored to call you, Mot..”

The breaking of glass startled Victoria and she screamed, catching the falling son in her arms.

Chapter 53

Seeking comfort in his mother’s love and arms moved the invisible bull’s-eye out of the path of the angry, vengeful bullet. Falling into her arms from the force of the impact on his left shoulder, Heath grabbed at his gun. Instinct responding over the pain, the instinct to respond to violence with violence, the will to survive. The will to protect those around him forced Heath to push Victoria down past the foot of the bed.

“Stay there.” ordered Heath crawling to the window and cautiously peering outside, gun held firmly in his hand seeking out the enemy. An act of self preservation engrained within him over the years, rearing it’s head with unconscious thought, his body responding before his mind comprehended.

Victoria watched the blood drip from his wound and spread across the blue shirt, turning it purple. Audra opened the door and gasped at the scene before her, “Mother, what’s happening?”

“Get down, Audra!” screamed Heath jumping up before Victoria could shout a warning. Victoria knelt rooted in her spot, seeing as if everything was mired in mud, slowed in pace but in reality just a split second of time.

Heath ran a few steps and threw himself in front of his sister. He propelled her into the hallway, unconscious after his body flinched again from the unknown assailant, the women’s screams of terror never reaching his ears.

Nick and Jarrod heard the reports of the rifle and ran towards the back of the house. Both brothers fired at the rider jumping on his horse.

Weaving slightly in the saddle, the rider fell to the ground and lay still. Running over, Nick cautiously approached, threw the rifle to the side and felt the man’s neck for a pulse.

“Dead.” stated Nick turning the man over, “BARRETT!”

“Barrett? What was he shooting at?” asked Jarrod out loud.

Glancing at the house, a broken window stood out amongst the rest, Nick jumped to his feet. “MY GOD, HEATH!”

Crawling into the hallway, Victoria pulled Heath’s heavy legs out of the doorway and shut the door, taking the target away from the sniper’s line of sight. Audra was crying and begging Heath to wake up.

“Audra, push and I’ll pull.”

Putting her hands on his chest, she pushed up and Victoria pulled her son over onto his side. Audra scampered out from under him while a soft moan escaped and his eyelids fluttered.

A sound reached into his mind thickened with pain and concern, eyes glazed and sluggish in their sockets. Pushing himself up onto his left elbow, Heath’s gun arm lifted automatically towards the heavy pounding footsteps alerting his senses of possible danger and spurring him into action.

Jarrod ran into Nick when he stopped at the sight of the gun pointed at them in the shrinking hallway, the barrel dark and ominous, the pistol unwavering in it’s owner’s grip.

“HEATH, IT’S YOUR BROTHERS!” shouted Victoria pushing down on the weakening arm. “HEATH!”

The words hadn’t reached his consciousness, he felt the strength in his arm failing him as he squinted at the figures in the hallway, willing his brain to respond to what his eyes were seeing.

Taking his face in her hands, she pulled it towards him. “It’s Nick and Jarrod, Heath.”

The words reached into his brain and he felt her take the suddenly heavy gun out of his hand.

“My…big…broth…” whispered Heath eyes rolling in their sockets, falling onto his back, slightly cushioned by the carpeted hallway and the inviting darkness free from the cloud bursts of pain.

Twenty four hours later, Nick ran the cold washcloth across the flushed face, his own eyes red and strained from lack of sleep. Jarrod dozed in a chair, his sleep broken by scattered dreams, broken by sudden bouts of mumblings and ramblings from his restless brother who lay, unaware of his two faithful nursemaids.

Dr. Howard Merar had been stunned by the scars on the back of his new patient. Nick’s dark glare at the physician’s questions had Victoria relaying a portion of her newest son’s past to her old friend.

Howard shook his head as he worked, seeking the pieces of lead lodged in Heath’s body, the small items partly responsible for the rising temperature.

Heath’s left shoulder was badly damaged from the projectile, his left side capturing the second bullet. Neither had found it’s way through Heath’s body and undoubtedly saved the lives of his mother and sister. Heath’s unselfish act of love and devotion, shielding Audra with his own body, was just another reason among many as to why the family held him firmly in their hearts.

Victoria entered the bedroom and put her arm around Nick’s waist. “Nick, Duke is downstairs. He needs to speak with you and Jarrod.”

“We’ll talk to him later, Mother.” replied Nick not breaking his steady motion of wetting, wringing and wiping. His hands stopped by his mother’s.

“You need a break, Nick. I want to sit with Heath for a while.” smiled Victoria running her eyes over his strained complexion.

Seeing the need in her eyes, Nick grudgingly relinquished his spot. “I’ll have some breakfast and be back in a little while.”

Leaning over, Nick spoke loudly in Heath’s ear and ruffled his hair, “Be right back, little brother. I got some business to take care of.”

Victoria took over Nick’s place by the bed. Shaking Jarrod awake, he motioned to him to follow and they left the room, walking down the hallway and staircase.

“How’s Heath?” asked Duke his hat twirling in his hands.

“Doc says he’ll be fine once when we bring down the fever.” stated Jarrod.

“I never figured Barrett would come after him. I knew he hated Heath, but it never crossed my mind.” frowned Duke remembering the fight between the two men.

Squeezing his foreman’s shoulder, Nick’s voice was quiet and tender, “Duke, none of us considered it. Yeah, Heath fired him, but I’d have done the same thing in Heath’s boots. We never realized Barrett would take it this far.”

“Yeah, I know.” admitted Duke. “We found Bentell at the lake. Me and the boys made sure he understands he’s not welcome in this area at any time. I’ll go let the men know how the boss is doing.”

Walking the foreman to the door, Nick stated “We’ll keep you posted on his progress.”

Nodding, Duke left and headed to the bunkhouse, alleviating the men’s concerns over Heath’s condition, his top priority before heading them out to work.

Shutting the door, Nick looked over at Jarrod. “Heath never said exactly what happened on the drive. Judging from Duke and the men, it must have really been something. Pappy, when that brother of ours is better, we need to go back to the lodge and worm that information out of him.”

Laughing, Jarrod flung an arm across Nick’s broad shoulders and walked him to the dining room. “Brother Nick, that little brother of ours is real close mouthed about certain things. We may need to bring extra bottles to loosen those lips.”

“Let’s eat so we can get back upstairs. I wanna be there when he wakes up.”

Epilogue

Four months later….

The sun was dipping down below the horizon as Heath Thomson Barkley spied the mansion he called home. His heart leaped at the sight caressing his eyes, the word no longer feeling foreign when it rolled off his tongue.

Taking his father’s name had been the final step that firmly encased him into the life he had found with his family. The trip back from a horse buying trip found him relaxing under the stars and contemplating the last year in his life.

The year had been turbulent and calm, sad and joyful, safe and dangerous. He worked with Nick each day, enjoyed the company of the man who had quickly grown to be his best friend. It had taken Nick time to get over the fear of Heath’s leaving when they had words or disagreements. It had taken Heath time to fully understand how to handle his older brother.

Looking at them now, an outsider would never have known the difficult journey the two men had embarked on over the past twelve months.

Putting the new horses in the corral and settling Charger in his stall, Heath grabbed his rifle and saddlebags. Walking through the oak door, he set his hat and guns on the round table, the excitement in his voice ringing out. “Mother!”

Baffled, he walked into the parlor and spied the cake on the table. Reading the words, he felt the tears fill his eyes, his heart fill with love. Looking up, the faces of his smiling family looked back at him and he wiped his eyes.

Greeting him with hugs and kisses, Heath smiled and reveled in his mother’s soft caress of his cheek.

“Boy howdy, has it been a year already?” teased Heath.

“Feels more like three, if you ask me.” groaned Nick, smiling widely at the wink thrown his way from Heath.

“Don’t listen to him Heath. Nobody else does.” chuckled Audra sticking her tongue out at her dark haired scowling brother.

Handing Heath a knife, Jarrod smiled, “Brother Heath, perhaps you’d like to do the honors. Gene needs to get to bed so he can get up early with us and go to the lodge. You know how those college boys can be.”

“Ha. Ha, Jarrod.” smirked Gene shaking his finger at the lawyer brother. “This time, I’m catching all the fish.”

“Gene, I thought we decided to leave the dynamite at home.” said Heath innocently enjoying the laughter around him, the teasing and love cushioning him as he cut the cake.

Sitting on the bench in the fragrant garden, Heath rolled a cigarette, lit a match and inhaled deeply. Staring at the stars, his eyes welled again at the inscription on the cake.

“Thank you for the light you bring to us. Happy first anniversary.”

Patting the small hand which squeezed his shoulder, he moved over and put an arm around her shoulders when she sat down. Placing a soft kiss on her silver hair, Heath sighed with contentment enjoying the solitude of the garden and the warm night air.

“Thank you for the cake and the beautiful inscription, Mother.”

“It’s just a small token of our love for you, Heath.” smiled Victoria. “I’m glad you feel loved and safe here.”

“I feel those things and so much more, Mother. So much more.”

Grounding out his cigarette, he stood and pulled her into an embrace. Cupping her cheek in his palm, she saw the tears on his cheeks and traced their tracks with her fingers. Heath held onto her waist and walked her into the house, his gentle words floating to her ears.

“Settled, Mother. I feel settled.”

THE END