by
Christy
Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program
"Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and
have been used without permission. No
copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.
Heath worked the fence line alone. It was his way to deal with the isolation he
felt. Sometimes he’d take a breather
from mending the posts. Looking up at
the hot sun, he’d brush the sweat off his brow. Opening his canteen, he’d take a swig of water so he would be
refreshed and return to work. The blond
would mumble sometimes, words only he could hear, words that may have given him
some inspiration to carry on, not that he’d ever needed them before. Towards the end of the day, as the sun
started to dip lower in the sky and it got cooler, he pulled his gear together
and took it to the nearest line shack, about a mile away. Leaving his shirt in his satchel, he mounted
Charger to begin the ride home. With
his bare chest, and well muscled body, the blond cowboy felt more free, a
little happier than he had been over the last year. A mile from home, he took a turn off the beaten path, ambling
with Charger towards the small cemetery under the tree where his father had
been buried almost ten years before.
“Be just a minute, Charger. Iffn we don’t get home soon, Mother will send out the light
brigade,” Heath whispered into Charger’s ear.
As if understanding his master, the red colored stallion whinnied,
nodding his head up and down. Heath
patted the slender neck. Walking over
to the grave, he knelt down. For a
minute he paid respects to his father until his gaze went to the second stone
so recently placed there that the wound remained as raw as the day it had been
incurred. His calloused fingers touched
the words as they had almost every day in the past eight months while his heart
bled anew.
“Nicholas
Jonathon Barkley
1846 – 1879
Beloved Son, Brother and Friend
His voice will be missed.
Heath had to chuckle at the last line. Even in their grief over Nick’s passing,
they knew he would appreciate that line.
His loud bellow was part of Nick, announcing the big dark haired cowboy
wherever he went, but especially to the mother who adored him and the brothers
and sister who teased him unmercifully about going deaf if he didn’t bring his
tone down several notches. Talking to
his brother brought Heath’s broken heart peace sometimes. Other times he could swear he had heard Nick
calling to him. In despair, he would
figure he was just imagining what he wished, that Nick would appear behind him
and slap him on the shoulder again.
“Ya can’t get rid of me that easy, Brother,” Nick would
holler. “No fire is mean enough to take
out a Barkley.” Tears fell down Heath’s
rugged face. A fire had taken his
beloved brother in San Francisco, almost eight months ago now. Nick had died saving two children. He had gone back in to make sure everyone
was out safe. He never came out of the
burning building. Heath had wanted to
go in to get the older brother he loved, but his brother, Jarrod wouldn’t let
him. No matter how he tried, Heath
couldn’t get the image of the building caving in with Nick still inside,
couldn’t reconcile the fact that his best friend was truly gone. Heath wiped away his tears.
“Hey, Nick,” he said.
“Just thought I’d come on by.
It’s a fine day you know, kinda hot and all, but not bad. Got most of the fencing done up on the North
Pasture. Don’t figure how those fences
break down all the time. Seems like me
or one of the hands spends all our days fixing them fences. The round up is done, but I reckon ya know
that. Told ya yesterday.” Heath touched the flowers his little sister
had planted on Nick’s grave. She
grieved in her own way, honoring Nick and showing him her love the only way she
knew how. Heath got up to leave.
“Reckon I ought ta go.
Mother gets a little jumpy if we’re not home when we plan ta be. Can’t say as I blame her. Jarrod is home from San Francisco. He said something about a posthumous medal
the mayor wants ta give ya. Audra about
cried when Jarrod started telling us. I
know just what she was thinking. Family
doesn’t want a medal, Nick. You know
what we’d rather have. Nothing is the
same without ya, Nick. Sometimes I just
can’t handle it. Then I figure we’d get
into one helluva fight iffn I just gave up.
Ya changed my life, Brother, and I won’t never forget it.” Tears falling again, Heath walked over to
Charger. Taking strength by leaning on
the slender neck of his friend, he heard the split second report of a rifle
firing. Before he could move, a bullet
slammed into his lower back throwing him against Charger. Frightened, the horse backed off and ran
away. Heath collapsed to the ground in
agony, his back on fire. Footsteps
alerted him to the intruder who wasn’t finished with the blond yet. Keeping his blue eyes closed, Heath waited
as silently as he could despite the torment of his injury.
“Damn horse,” a man muttered. “Had to run off. Bet
there was some money in them saddle bags.”
Heath could have told the thief different. He didn’t have a penny on him.
Ya didn’t need money to fix fences.
Moving just a little, Heath took his knife out of his front pocket. Holding it under his stomach he positioned
it to be ready for use. He could figure
what the thief would do once he found Heath’s back pockets empty. The blond wasn’t disappointed. The man shoved him over. Heath didn’t react to the fact his legs
didn’t move until the man pushed them.
Instead he held up the knife aiming it at the man’s heart. Shock came across the assailant’s face as
the tables were turned on him. He fell
first to his knees, then to the ground in slow motion. Heath watched the man die, and then dropped
his weapon. He tried to move his legs,
tried to get up, but it was no use.
Nothing moved. His mind was
consumed with pain until a fog seemed to come over him. He turned his head to the right, his hand
reaching out towards the spirit of his lost brother.
“Nick,” the young man begged. “Nick! Help me, Nick!! Help
me!” The fog grew harder to see through
becoming a dark velvet blanket that surrounded Heath with warmth until he gave
into his pain and let the darkness take him away.
* * * * * * * *
Monterey, California
“John your work is perfect,” Father Bernard told the young
man who had just finished repairing a pew in the missionary church. “It looks like it was never broken.” The young man smiled in appreciation. He ran his hand over the smooth texture of
the wood.
“Reckon I always did like to work with wood, Father. Never
had time for it before.”
“Well, if you do ranching as well as you work with wood,
you’re probably a natural.”
“I miss ranching.
Miss my family too,” John admitted.
“I imagine they miss you as well, my son. Maybe it’s time you went home.” The dark haired man shook his head.
“Leave it alone, Father.
I spose I’ve made my choice.
Going back now would only be cruel and senseless.”
“Why, my son? They
couldn’t have known the facts. They
would never have let you suffer alone if they had known. You have told me that yourself.” Troubled as he often had been in the last
three months, John sat down in the pew he had just fixed. He seemed to look down at his work worn
hand, then back to the priest.
“Heath is the one who told me about this place, you know,”
he confessed. “I asked Dr. Lowe to come here because I thought I could still do
some good even now. You’ve been very patient.”
“You have been a gift to us, John. You help with the children, repair anything
we ask of you, and even groom the horses.
But tell me, who is this Heath?” Father Bernard sat down in a pew. John sat in the one in front of him.
“Heath is part of my past, Father.”
“I knew a man named Heath once. He was a boy then, fifteen or sixteen. He stayed with us for a year, recovering from wounds he received
in the war. He was a great deal like
you, proud, determined, and not quite so loud.” John laughed.
“No, I suppose not.”
“So you think they are one and the same?”
“I know they are, Father,” was all John would say. He stood and worked to gather his tools with
Father Bernard helping him. He put his
hand on the pews and walked towards the back of the church where he kept the
tools. His mind was totally on Heath
when the dark haired man gave a strangled cry.
Falling to his knees, he grabbed at his back. Father Bernard rushed
forward, kneeling in front of the anguished man.
“John! John, what is it?
What’s wrong?” he demanded.
John’s rugged face was taut with pain.
Sweat glistened on his brow.
“Deep breaths, John.
Take deep breaths.” John tried
to do as the Father urged. The gut
wrenching pain was familiar to him. It
was as if someone had plugged a bullet into his back. All he could see was a blond cowboy, calling out to him. Dear God, this couldn’t be happening, John
told himself. As the pain abated, he
stood slowly, using a pew to hold himself steady.
“John?”
“I’m all right, Father.
I…it’s Heath. I have to get to him.
He needs me. He’s been shot!”
“Heath? Do you know where he is?” Father Bernard
asked.
“He’s home, Father.
I have to go, tonight. I don’t
know how I’ll explain this to my family, but I have to go.”
“You’re in no condition to go by yourself, Son,” Father
Bernard said. Nick slammed his hand
down on the pew in response, knowing the priest was right. “I will go with you, if you like.” Nick’s hazel eyes lifted towards the man in
his priestly robes.
“You’ll go with me?
But you’re needed here. No I
can’t ask you to do that.” John refused.
“I’ll manage.”
“My son, I may be a lowly priest, but even I know, as loud
and cantankerous as you are, you’ll offend the first person who tries to help
you. Let me go with you. Heath was once
very important to the mission. If he is
close enough to you that you can feel his pain, then you must go to him. But tell me, how do you know him? If I recall he had only a mother. He was a rather angry and lonely young
man. I have often wondered what became
of him.” John’s hazel eyes took on a
distant appearance as they gazed into an emptiness that had been with him for
eight months. Father Bernard waited
patiently.
“Heath came to our family almost four years ago,
Father. You’re right. He was angry. In fact, we fought so often, you’d of thought we were going to
kill each other.” Father Bernard
smiled.
“I can imagine the two of you fighting. I don’t know which one of you is more
stubborn.”
“Oh, my mother has said Heath gets that prize, Father,”
John grinned. “But he comes by it
naturally. You see, Heath and I share
the same blood, the same heritage and the same father. Heath is my brother and my best
friend.”
“Heath?” Father Bernard wondered in amazement.
“Heath. He is part
of my soul, Father. He needs me. I have to go home. I have to go home as soon as possible.” Father Bernard put his hand on John’s shoulder. John put his hand on the priest’s.
“We’ll leave on the morning train,” Father Bernard
promised. “We must hurry if we are going to be ready.”
“You are certain, Father?
I can manage on my own.” Father
Bernard shook his head.
“You are my friend, John.
I will go with you. When you are
home safe, I will come back. It is
simple.” John agreed. He made one more confession before he and
Father Bernard went back to the mission.
“Father, you know most of my past. I’ve told ya about it enough, but I never
told ya my real name. Reckon it’s about
time I did.”
“You do not have to, John.”
“Yes, I do,” John said. “You’d be hard pressed to figure
anything out unless I did. My real name
is Nick Barkley.”
“Nick Barkley? But…” Father Bernard’s voice trailed
off. He patted Nick’s shoulder. “Well,
Nick, I’m happy to know you. Let’s get
going back to the mission. The sooner
we get packed, the better.” Nick took
the Father’s arm and walked with him back to the mission house where they
lived. Nervous, anxious and excited,
all at the same time, Nick put his hand on his back again. The phenomenon that had given him this
message, the message that Heath needed him was something the big hearted man
did not understand. What he did know
was that he had to get home. He had to
help his brother, even if it brought more grief and sorrow to the family he
loved. He fervently hoped he was making
the right decision.
Jarrod Barkley paced the foyer while his blond haired
sister sat on the stairway. Hours had
passed since Charger had come home without his master. Jarrod and the hands had all gone out
looking. The lawyer went immediately to
his brother’s grave, knowing that Heath went there almost every day after he
finished his work. Like all the family,
Heath was having a devil of a time accepting Nick’s death. When the oldest Barkley son found his
youngest brother, lying on his back, his chest bare, and his hand outstretched
towards Nick’s grave, he cried.
“Heath! My God, Heath, what happened?” Jarrod asked before
he could think. He ignored the dead
body lying near Heath. Firing off three
shots, he knew help would arrive quickly.
There wasn’t a mark on Heath to be seen, until Jarrod gently lifted the
blond brother to check his back. Red
blood covered the tanned skin.
“Nick,” Heath moaned. “Help me.” Jarrod’s stomach lurched.
He spoke soothingly to Heath, but was never sure if he heard him. In a very short period of time, Heath was
loaded onto a wagon and taken home. One
of the hands went to town for the doctor.
Jarrod held his brother’s head in his lap till they arrived home. Everytime Heath wakened he called for
Nick. Jarrod didn’t discourage
him. As they pulled on to the road
leading to the house, Heath opened his blue eyes, speaking lucidly.
“Pappy?” he asked.
“I’m here Brother Heath.
I’m here.”
“Thanks, Pappy. It
was getting kinda cold.” Heath coughed,
a bit of blood appearing on his lips. Jarrod wanted to clutch his brother to him. Instead he swiped some blond hair away from
the forehead.
“You hang on, Heath.
Don’t you go getting any ideas.
You hear me, Brother Heath. You
fight!” Heath gave Jarrod that beloved
lop sided grin until he lost consciousness again. Jarrod let the hands take him into the house and to his
room. Victoria and Audra came to the
foyer as the men went upstairs.
“Jarrod? Heath?”
Victoria’s face was white. Audra
held her mother’s hand trying to give her courage. When her son died, some of the light in Victoria Barkley died as
well. Jarrod put his hand on his
mother’s shoulders, hoping and praying her spirit was up to the challenge that
he knew lay ahead of them.
“Mother, Heath has been shot. He got the man who shot him.
I can only think it was a bushwhacker.
Dave has gone for Dr. Merar.”
“How bad, Jarrod?” Audra asked. Jarrod’s silent answer was enough. Silas was standing nearby, having heard the commotion.
“Silas, get us some hot water, towels and bandages,” Audra
ordered. “Mother?” Victoria’s gaze was
anywhere but in the present. Audra and
Jarrod exchanged glances. Jarrod shook
Victoria slightly.
“Mother! Heath needs you.
Mother!” The iron spirit of
Victoria Barkley returned in an instant.
She touched Jarrod’s cheek, nodding.
“Of course he does.
Audra, you come and help me with your brother. Jarrod, we may need you too.
Silas, we’ll be waiting for the water and towels.” The trio hurried upstairs to Heath’s
room. Together they cleaned him up and
got him as comfortable as possible.
Thankfully, he was only slightly conscious, moaning when moved, but
otherwise not calling for Nick. Jarrod
didn’t know what his mother would have done if Heath had continued calling for
their lost brother. When Dr. Merar
came, Jarrod and Audra were ushered from the room. Victoria refused to leave.
Dr. Merar did not argue with her.
Three hours later, an exhausted Victoria and Dr. Merar
came down the stairs together. Victoria
asked Silas to go up and sit with Heath.
Dr. Merar joined the family in the living room. Jarrod poured himself a much needed
drink. He offered one to Dr. Merar who
took the brandy gratefully.
“Mother?” he asked as Victoria sat down on the settee with
Audra. She looked up, her face still
pale, nodding.
“A brandy, Jarrod, please. Pour Audra a sherry.”
Audra put her arm around her mother.
Victoria returned the gesture.
Jarrod had always been grateful for the bond between his mother and
sister. Sometimes they communicated
without talking. But then the entire
family was close. They all lived for each other.
“Howard? What is the story? How is Heath?” Jarrod asked
sitting down in a chair next to his mother and sister. Dr. Merar sat across from the family sipping
on his brandy. He glanced at
Victoria. Her slight dignified nod gave
the physician permission to speak.
“Well, Jarrod, Audra, I’ve explained Heath’s condition to
your mother. The bullet was lodged in
the back, but close to the spinal cord.”
Audra gasped. Victoria put her
drink on the table and put her arm around her daughter whispering something to
her. Audra gathered her courage and
waited. Jarrod swallowed his own fear.
“Heath is strong.
He has that in his favor. We got
the bullet out, Victoria and I. That
was no small achievement. I tested
Heath’s reflexes before we did surgery.
He was paralyzed from the waist down.
I didn’t see any damage to the spinal cord. It is possible he will recover completely or somewhere in between
or this may be a permanent condition.” The doctor let the words hang in the air. No one spoke. It seemed as if no one was even breathing. Dr. Merar took a deep breath to continue.
“He was outside for a while. He’s always been prone to
chest colds. He’s been coughing, so
we’ll have to watch for pneumonia. The bullet nicked the lung which explains
the blood he coughed up. My concern is if there is more bleeding inside, I
can’t stop it. But this is Heath we’re
talking about. He’s been through worse
and recovered nicely. We’re just going
to have to wait and see. Now I have to
get back to town. Don’t move him any
more than necessary and don’t leave him alone for any reason.”
“We won’t, Howard,” Victoria assured him, standing up,
every inch the indomitable woman she was.
Jarrod observed her actually fighting to maintain control. It was too soon, too soon since Nick, Jarrod
thought. They couldn’t go through this
again. They couldn’t. Victoria saw Dr. Merar out. He promised he’d be back in the
morning. The family knew what to do for
Heath. They knew it was going to be a
long night. None of them would
sleep. Together the three of them stood
in the foyer.
“Well, Mother. How
do you want to do this?” Jarrod asked in a gentle manner. Victoria looked from her son to her
daughter.
“Audra, if you and Jarrod can eat something, I wish you
would. Then you should both try and get
some rest.”
“Mother, we can’t,” Audra objected. “What if…Heath calls
for us?” She didn’t say what she was
really thinking. Jarrod took his
sister’s hand.
“We’ll get something to eat, Mother and bring some soup
and bread up for you when we’re finished.
I think this is one night when we all need to be with Heath. If something should happen…well we need to
be with him.” Wearily Victoria
nodded. She leaned against her strong
son, weeping in dread. Drying her
tears, the Matriarch went upstairs.
Jarrod and Audra watched her.
“She’s so brave,” Audra admired. Jarrod drew his sister into a hug.
“As brave as she has to be, Honey, just like you.”
“I’m not,” Audra objected. Tears formed in her pretty blue eyes. “I’m scared Jarrod. I’m so scared. I keep thinking of Nick.
Why, Jarrod? Why is this
happening?”
“I don’t know Honey.
Maybe God knows something we don’t.” Jarrod’s answer was simplistic but
it was the only one he could come up with.
He took his sister to the kitchen where Silas joined them to make some
dinner and make sure they ate as their mother had instructed.
* * * * * * * *
Heath passed a very silent night. He never moved. Victoria watched his breathing, sometimes noticing that her own
soft breaths echoed his. Jarrod kept
changing the water basin so that she could keep cool cloths on his
forehead. Audra laid down next to her
brother, taking his hand in hers and holding it close until she fell
asleep. Her big brother placed a
blanket over her, relieved she could sleep.
In the hours before dawn, Heath’s breathing grew labored. Still he did not wake.
“Mother, his fever seems to be about the same,” Jarrod
told his mother several hours after Audra fell asleep. “Why don’t you go lay down?”
“No!” Victoria returned with a sharpness she hadn’t
intended. Jarrod sighed.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I’m just worried about
you.” Victoria wiped Heath’s hot face,
and chest. She spoke while her eyes
remained transfixed on her youngest son.
“I can’t leave him, Jarrod, not for a minute. If I leave him I’ll lose him.”
“Mother…”
“I wasn’t with Nick.
He died alone. He died without
his mother to comfort him. I can’t do
that to Heath.” Jarrod sat down behind
his mother, planning to hug her. She
wiggled away.
“No, Jarrod. I can’t give in now. I have to be strong for your brother, for
you and Audra. I won’t give up on
another child, not ever.”
“Mother, you didn’t give up on Nick. You were here in
Stockton. Nick was in San
Francisco. There’s nothing you could
have done.”
“He was my son,” Victoria cried with a ragged edge. “He was my son.” Her voice was lost in the grief that still hounded her. Jarrod hugged her anyway, holding her stiff
body until she relaxed. The dawn came
and Heath still breathed. But he
didn’t wake and the fear in Victoria, Jarrod and Audra came to stay as Heath
lay unconscious and his fever started to rise again.
* * * * * * * *
Nick had never been a man to sit still for long. The train left Monterey at 7 in the
morning. The ten hour trip was enough
to drive him insane. He paced up and
down the aisle of the train, gaining more than a few looks from the surprised
passengers. Like Father Bernard, Nick
wore a priest’s clothing. They had
decided this would be the most effective disguise so that Nick wasn’t bombarded
by friends and locals when he got off the train in Stockton. He wasn’t up to questions. All he wanted was to get to his little
brother. Time was wasting. Nick knew every minute they delayed might
mean they would be too late.
“Stockton, next stop,” the conductor finally called
out. Nick made his way back to Father
Bernard. He tripped over someone’s
foot.
“Hey, watch where yer going,” a male voice cried out. Nick would normally have told the man to
mind his own business. Instead he
muttered an apology, and continued on.
Father Bernard’s hand on his shoulder stopped him.
“Good job holding the temper, Nick,” he complimented. Nick grinned, though his hood almost
effectively hid his face.
“Didn’t figure a priest should start a fight,” he
chuckled. “We’ll need to go to the
livery and rent a buggy. It’s about an
hour to the ranch.”
“That’s just fine, Nick,” Father Bernard answered. Together the men got off the train. Father Bernard retrieved their luggage, each
of them carrying a small case with their clothes and necessary items. Priests weren’t a common sight in Stockton,
except for Father Tom who ran the orphanage and the Catholic Church. Nick could almost feel the stares. He didn’t care, he told himself. As long as no one recognized him, he didn’t
care. He held his case close while
waiting for Father Bernard to rent the buggy.
When the owner of the livery came out, talking to Father Bernard, Nick
turned away. He was relieved when he
could climb into the buggy. His heart
was pounding. Time was of the essence. He knew it.
“Father, you couldn’t hurry it up a bit, could ya?” Nick
asked as they left the outskirts of town.
The wind blew a little more around them, the air still warm from the hot
day. The sun was starting to set. Nick was very nervous, but he was accustomed
to holding his emotions inside.
“Well, Nick, we can go fast, but if we don’t end up at
your place in one piece, that might be a problem, don’t you think?” Father Bernard never seemed to lose his
sense of humor. How did he do that,
Nick wondered.
“I spose you’re right.
Eight months, Father, eight months of not seeing them. My mother is going to take her wooden spoon
to me but good.” Father Bernard’s
chuckle filled the air.
“Well maybe she can do more with you than I could,” he
laughed.
“You? What did you do?” Nick barked.
“Since the day you came to the mission, I’ve been trying
to get you to go home, Nick. It’s as
clear as day that you missed your family.
Now you’re racing across the state because you think Heath is hurt. Seems to me it shouldn’t have taken a
message like that to bring you home.”
Nick groaned.
“You sound like my brother, Jarrod.”
“Smart man.” The
two continued on in silence. Nick’s
thoughts were completely on his mother and siblings. When Father Bernard pulled the horses up in front of the house,
Nick clenched his fists, took a deep breath and said a silent prayer. Prayers he had learned over the last several
months could bring more comfort and courage than he had thought imaginable.
“We’re here, Nick,” Father Bernard told him. Nodding, Nick got out of the buggy. He stood for a second, taking in the scents
of his home, the horses, the trees, the sounds of men still working in the
corral. He was home. Dear God, he was home at last.
It seemed like forever before Silas answered the door when
Nick knocked on it. Nick heard the door
open, and the light aroma of flowers reminded him how his mother loved her
garden.
“Gentlemens, can I helps ya?” Silas asked. Nick wondered what Silas thought of two
frocked priests standing in the door way.
The black man’s voice was as cool as a cucumber, unfailingly polite.
“I’m Father Bernard.
My friend and I came to see Jarrod Barkley. Is he home?” Father Bernard inquired. This was the plan the two of them had come up with. Nick didn’t want to upset the family any
more than he had to…Approaching Jarrod would be easiest.
“Well I don’t know.
Mr. Barkley, he awful busy.”
“It’s urgent,” Nick huffed. Maybe his voice gave him away.
Maybe his tone caught Silas’ attention.
Nick didn’t know, but his friend backed into the house. Father Bernard went in with Nick behind him.
“Mr. Barkley, he in the study. Would you like me to get him for you?” Nick shook his head. Father Bernard spoke for him.
“If you’ll lead the way, perhaps a private room would be
more suitable.”
“Yes, Sir,” Silas answered. The black house servant who was more family than servant to the
Barkley’s led Father Bernard and Nick to the study. He opened the door letting them into the room. Jarrod who was taking a breather from
nursing Heath was having a drink and staring into the fireplace. He turned around in surprise as Silas
entered.
“Mr. Jarrod, these mens say theys come to see you. I hopes it be okay I let them in?”
“Certainly, Silas.
Has Dr. Merar been down yet?”
“No, Sir. He’s
still up there with Mr. Heath and Miz Barkley, and Miss Audra. Do you wants I should have him see you
before he leaves?”
“Yes, Silas.
Thank-you,” Jarrod answered dismissing the man. Nick’s feet tapped a little impatiently
getting Jarrod’s attention. Father
Bernard stepped forward. Nick didn’t
move. His legs were on fire to run upstairs. Heath was hurt. He wanted
to throw off the hood that hid his face and hug Jarrod. Knowing his brother was close made his heart
ache. Why, why had he stayed away?
“Mr. Barkley, forgive our intrusion. I’m Father Bernard. I work at St. Catherine’s Mission in
Monterey. I have a matter of great
delicacy to talk with you about.”
Jarrod shook the priest’s hand. Nick heard Jarrod’s sigh. He almost chuckled waiting for the barrage
of questions that was sure to come.
“I must admit, you pique my interest, Father. Have we met
before?”
“We have not.”
“I see. I’m afraid
I’m out of guesses. Would you care to
enlighten me as to why you are here? If
not, my brother is very ill and I need to attend to him.”
“How ill is he?” Nick demanded in a short tone. Jarrod looked from Father Bernard to the man
who was completely covered from head to foot in a tan robe. The voice was muffled. Jarrod stared, not believing what he was
hearing. Shaking his head a little, the
logical lawyer decided he must have only imagined that voice.
“Heath, my brother, was shot yesterday. He has a high fever. I should be going back
upstairs. It’s very serious. May I ask what your concern with Heath is?”
“Your brother’s injury is why we came” Father Bernard
started to explain.
“Now I am very curious,” Jarrod admitted, his tone sternly
protective. Nick’s patience was at an
end. He threw off his hood.
“We don’t have time for this,” he thundered. “Jarrod,
please.” Jarrod Barkley stumbled
backward, staring at the tall black haired brother he thought he had lost. Gripping a chair to hold himself up he was
speechless. Silence filled the room. Neither brother knew what to say. Wisely Father Bernard remained quiet. In a few seconds, Jarrod had crossed back to
Nick. His hands cupped Nick’s face.
“Nick. Oh, God,
Brother Nick. I never…Nick!” Jarrod started to cry, hugging Nick close. The dark haired rancher choked, trying to
swallow his emotion, but it was hopeless. Tears threatened him. He returned his brother’s embrace.
“I’m sorry, Jarrod. I’m so sorry,” he replied trying to
reassure him. “Don’t cry or I will and I hate that. I love you, Pappy. I love
you.” Jarrod only cried harder at the
words. The brothers held tightly to
each other, their devotion clear, their relief to be together again
evident. When Jarrod stepped back, Nick
didn’t see his brother’s face, but he could imagine his gentler brother’s
expression of joy.
“Why, Nick, why?” Jarrod asked, his emotion still choking
him. Nick didn’t reply. “Nick?”
“Can’t you see, Jarrod? Can’t you see why I couldn’t come
home? I couldn’t hurt you any more than
you had been. Jarrod look!” Stepping forward Jarrod took Nick’s hand in
his. He placed it over his heart as the
truth of Nick’s plight stabbed him as sharp as any knife. His search of Nick’s empty hazel eyes
brought empathetic sorrow.
“I see, Brother Nick, and you know I understand. You know I do. But there’s nothing, nothing that would ever make up for you not
being here. Don’t you know how we grieved for you? You should have come home.
You should have come home.” The
brothers hugged again, their reunion cut short as a knock came on the door
again. Nick was about to put his hood
up.
“None of that,” Jarrod ordered. “Stay here for a minute.
I’ll get Mother and Audra.”
“I have to see Heath, Jarrod,” Nick almost shouted.
“I know, Nick, I know.”
Jarrod patted his brother on the shoulder. Nick grabbed Jarrod’s hand.
“I felt the pain when he got shot, Pappy. I knew he needed me. That’s what brought me home, Heath and
Father Bernard.” Jarrod shook his head.
“God moves in mysterious ways,” he intoned as he left the
room, leaving the other two men behind.
Silas was at the door. The
servant told him his mother and Dr. Merar were in the foyer. Jarrod asked Silas to get Audra for him, and
then stay with Heath. Joining Dr. Merar
and his mother, he couldn’t help his heart sinking at the grim looks on both of
their faces. Victoria saw Jarrod and
hurried to him, hugging him to her.
“He’s dying, Jarrod,” she wept. “We have to do something.
We have to do it now!” Jarrod looked with alarm at Dr. Merar. The old family physician shook his head.
“He’s not fighting, Jarrod. He’s called for Nick a few times, but other than that, he still
hasn’t come around. His breathing is worse and he’s coughing up more
blood. It was a miracle he survived
last night. I think it’s a matter of
hours. It’s as if he wants to die.”
“Maybe he does,” Jarrod answered simply. “He wants
Nick.”
“Oh, God,” Victoria sobbed. Jarrod took her by the arms just as Audra came down the stairs.
“Mother, there is hope, I promise,” he reassured her. “If he wants Nick, well, maybe wishes do
come true.” Victoria’s gray eyes
snapped to attention as Audra stopped next to her mother. Her angelic face was puzzled and
anxious.
“Jarrod, what did you want. I can’t leave Heath.” The
young woman objected.
“Just for a few minutes, Honey. Dr. Merar would you come with us or do you need to leave?” Dr. Merar looked a little askance. He smiled a little, his wonder getting the
better of him.
“I can stay a while longer. If it helps Heath, you’ve got my attention, Counselor.”
“It definitely will help Heath,” Jarrod informed
them. “This involves all of us. Mother, Audra, do come with me.” Jarrod had
thought of telling his mother and Audra that Nick was in the next room, but he
couldn’t resist surprising them. With
his mother and sister on either arm and Dr. Merar following him, he went into
the study where Victoria and Audra froze.
“Nick, we’re here,” Jarrod announced. Audra was the first
to move, but Jarrod held her back. He
put his arm around her. She buried her
face in his chest, weeping in her shock.
Victoria stepped forward.
“Mother? Audra,” Nick had to ask. Victoria’s voice was barely above a whisper,
but her son heard her speak his name with all the love he had craved in the
past months. He tried again not to cry,
cursing his stupid emotions. He would
not cry, not in front of his mother. The tears came anyway only to be wiped
away by a dainty handkerchief. The fine
hand touched his face in a soft caress.
“Nicholas,” Victoria said. “My baby. My son. Dear God in heaven.” His hands moved hesitantly until they
grabbed the slender waist and lifted her into the air, swinging her around in a
circle. Laughter filled the room.
“Nicholas, put me down immediately,” Victoria
chastised. In a second, Nick had set
her safely on the floor, kissing her forehead.
Her tired body rested against her middle son while he held her close.
She stepped back. Nick could sense his mother’s emotions, hear her soft
breathing, smell her scent and he knew she was looking directly at him.
“Nick,” Still Victoria couldn’t stop staring at the young
man. “Oh, Nick, where have you been?” Before he could answer, the diminutive
mother went on. “All the days and nights…Who took care of you? Why didn’t you
come home. I have so many questions,
but all I can do is be happy you are home.
My son.” She leaned up and
kissed him again. Nick leaned over and
returned the kiss on her cheek.
“I’m sorry, Mother,” he apologized. “Father Bernard here took me in. He has a mission in Monterey.” Victoria’s
tears continued to fall as her daughter threw herself at her brother and
scolded him as well. Nick wasn’t sure
how much more he could take.
Fortunately Jarrod came to rescue him by pulling their sister back.
“Honey, give him a chance to breathe,” he teased.
“I’ve waited eight months to give him a hug, Jarrod,”
Audra protested. “You were right about
Heath. God does know things we
don’t.” Jarrod smiled. Nick cocked his head in confusion. Victoria’s mind returned to her dying
son. She took Nick’s hand.
“Nick…” she implored. “Heath needs you. Howard says he’s given up. Heath has gone to visit the grave…every
day…he’s never gotten over…he loves you so much.” Victoria was clearly finding it hard to express her youngest
son’s grief over Nick’s apparent death.
The second son bit his lip, his stomach churning with guilt. He couldn’t know, his mother was doing the
same thing while her voice cracked with the intensity of her maternal concern,
love and protectiveness.
“Take me to him, Mother,” Nick returned. “Please.” Victoria took her son by the
arm. They walked past the stunned Dr.
Merar. Father Bernard followed. Nick knew the house, but he was too anxious
to try and find his own way upstairs.
Everything was so dark inside him these days, heck all these months, but
his family, his family was giving him some of the light he needed and that
light included his younger brother, his best friend. If there was any way to save his brother, he would. He’d give his
life for Heath’s. He’d do anything.
* * * * * * * *
Upstairs, Silas was sitting with Heath. The young man hadn’t awakened in the last
twenty-four hours except for an occasional moan of pain and to call for
Nick. Placing a cool cloth on the hot
forehead, the man stood when the
bedroom door opened. Nick didn’t see
the black man’s face register Nick’s presence, nor his comprehension of his
affliction.
“Mr. Nick?” he finally cried.
“Silas!” Nick cried.
“Sorry I didn’t greet ya downstairs.
Didn’t want to give myself away.
Thanks for taking care of the family while I was gone.”
“Oh, Mr. Nick,” Silas replied. He took Nick’s hand in his. “It’s a sight ta see you, Mr. Nick.
It shorely is. Welcome home, Mr.
Nick. Welcome home.”
“Thank-you, Silas.
It’s good to be home,” Nick returned.
Victoria helped Nick to sit on the bed.
She turned to the group gathered behind her.
“Everyone out.
Nick and I will take care of Heath for now. Jarrod, Audra, get something to eat and make sure Father Bernard
and Howard get something too. Silas,
you can help them.”
“Yes, Ma’am, Miz Barkley,” Silas nodded.
“Mother!” Audra objected.
Again Jarrod played peacemaker.
“Come on, Little Sister.
You know when we’ve been banished.”
“But Heath…”
“I’ll call you, Sweetheart, I promise, if anything…I
promise.” Audra nodded. The contrast between happiness at Nick’s
being home, and anguish over Heath’s condition was taking a toll on all of
them. The door shut behind
everyone. Victoria pulled up a chair
and sat down, giving Nick his own time with his ailing brother, the two sons
whose hearts beat as one to the point where Heath was willing to give up his
life to join his lost brother for eternity.
Nick fumbled till he found Heath’s hand. It was so warm. He could
almost feel the heat radiating off the man.
“Hey there, Little Brother,” he started, stroking the hand
that he couldn’t see. How he cursed his
helplessness until he focused his attention on the man who lay in front of
him. He knew Heath Barkley better than
any man alive, inside and out. He knew
Heath’s soft side, his stubborn pride, his humor and compassion. He had to reach him somehow. He didn’t need to see to try.
“I don’t know if you can hear me, Heath. I’m real sorry I didn’t come home
sooner. There’s no excuse for what I
done, and you can punch me out if ya ever get out of this infernal bed. Doc says ya aren’t fighting, Little
Brother. I don’t wanta hear that. You’re a Barkley, Boy and Barkley’s always
fight. You got a ranch to run, Boy, and
I’m here to run it with ya, iffn ya will give me a chance. Course, I might need some help, but I’m
willing to give it a try if you are.”
Heath moaned again. Victoria’s
voice reached Nick’s ear. Her hand
touched his knee.
“Nick, he’s trying to wake up. I can see his eyes moving.
Keep on talking, Sweetheart.
Please.”
“Ya hear that, Heath?
I only been home an hour or so and Mother’s already telling me what to
do. For crying out loud, if you back
out now, who’s going to help me handle her?
She’ll be after me with her wooden spoon just to make up for the fact
you gave up. Heath, please!” Nick
tried. Suddenly Nick had an idea. He slapped Heath’s hand.
“HEATH BARKLEY, THIS IS A WORKING RANCH. THERE’S NO ROOM FOR SLUG A BEDS. TIME TO GET MOVING BOY! TIMES A WASTING” Heath’s blue eyes shot open.
“Boy howdy, Nick,” the blond said before he realized. “Don’t hafta shout.” Victoria would always remember Heath’s face
as it dawned on him that he wasn’t dreaming and that he really was seeing his
brother. Heath stared in complete
disbelief, his eyes going from Nick to his mother and back again.
“Nick?”
“In the flesh, Little Brother. Wanta pinch me?”
Heath closed his eyes, coughing up a large amount of
phlegm and not the dreaded blood.
Victoria raced to get a cloth and gave it to her son. Exhausted, the
young man tried to relax on the pillows.
He was staring at Nick. His gaze
went to his mother who nodded at him, her wonder as apparent as his own.
“Heath?” Nick asked. “You gonna be all right?” The blond couldn’t speak. Whether it was shock or pain, even he didn’t
know. The sapphire eyes were sprinkled
with a happiness that Nick would have been so relieved to see. Instead he was afraid, afraid his brother
had slipped back into unconsciousness.
“Heath! Answer me,” Nick demanded.
“Reckon so.”
Heath’s hand encircled Nick’s. Nick sighed.
“Don’t scare me like that,” he scolded. Heath didn’t reply.
“Nick, I think he’s sleeping,” Victoria told her son.
“There’s a basin with cold water, and some cloths next to it by the bed. Can you keep him cool if I go and tell the
others?”
“Yes, Mother, I can.”
“Don’t go far,” She whispered giving him a kiss on the
cheek. “You and I need to have a
talk.”
“I love you too, Mother,” Nick replied trying to ease her
frustration and anger towards him. Nick
Barkley was no fool. Even the darkness
that surrounded him couldn’t keep him from feeling his mother’s trembling hands
or hearing the edge of hurt in her voice when she spoke. He had fences to mend with her and the
family. He was ready, ready to fight
for his place in the family again. He
was home and he had no intention of leaving again.
“And I love you Nicholas Jonathon Barkley. That does not let you off the hook,”
Victoria went on. “I’ll be back in a
little while with something for you to eat.”
Leaving her sons alone, Victoria walked downstairs to the dining room
where her son and daughter were picking at sandwiches and coffee while Father
Bernard and Dr. Merar ate with gratitude.
The nervous chatter ended when Victoria stepped into the room.
“He’s awake,” she told them. Jarrod and Audra hugged each other. “Nick yelled at him to get him to wake up. He’s still got the fever, but I believe that
Nick will help him turn the corner.
When Heath is better, I’m going to talk to those two about the sanctity
of life. I think they’re going to be
the death of me.”
“Mother, if they haven’t done it yet, they probably
won’t,” Jarrod smiled, his relief evident in his haggard face. Victoria sank down in a chair.
“Don’t count on it,” she answered as if she were a hundred
years old. Audra knelt in front of her
mother.
“You’ve got that sparkle in your eye, Mother. I missed it,” the girl observed. Victoria kissed her daughter’s cheek.
“Thank you, Sweetheart.
You children are my life. I
can’t explain how I felt about the fire, and your brother.” The mother turned
her attention to Father Bernard.
“Father, how can we thank-you for bringing my son home?”
“Wasn’t me,” Father Bernard demurred. He pointed upward. “It was Him.”
“Amen,” everyone chorused.
“Father Bernard, I have a question,” Audra asked.
“Of course, Miss Barkley.”
“Nick’s blindness.
Is it…is it permanent?”
Father Bernard took the girl’s hands in his.
“Well, Miss Barkley, nothing is for certain. I’m sure Nick never gives up hope he’ll see
again. Will you?” Audra’s beautiful smile was angelic.
“No, I won’t.
Thank-you, Father.”
“You’re more than welcome. I have to confess Nick has been a real asset to the mission in
Monterey. We’re going to miss him, but
he belongs here.”
“Yes, he does,” Victoria stated. “Father, how long can you stay?”
“Only a few days.
I wanted to make sure Nick got home safe. He wanted to come home by himself. Said he wouldn’t have a problem.
I begged to differ. You must
realize he has had a while to become adjusted to his condition. While he was in the hospital, they taught him
how to care for himself. He has been
doing our repairs at the mission.”
“Repairs?” Jarrod gulped.
“He puts me to shame. All I had to do when I was blind was shoot a
man.”
“Jarrod!” Victoria scolded while Audra giggled.
“Sorry, Mother,” Jarrod answered gallantly.
“Father, Audra can show you to the guest room. I’m going to sit with Nick and Heath for
awhile.”
“Thank-you, Mrs. Barkley.
I would like to see Heath before I leave.”
“Certainly,” Victoria acquiesced. “You came all this way.”
“Well, apparently Heath inadvertently sent Nick to us at
the mission. When Heath was discharged
from the army hospital after the war, one of his friends brought him to the
mission. He stayed with us for a
year. Apparently he told Nick and
that’s how Nick came to us.” Jarrod,
Victoria and Audra all exchanged glances in amazement. They all wondered where Nick would have
ended up if Heath had never come to them.
“Unbelievable,” Jarrod muttered. Victoria shook her
head.
“All right. We’re
all tired. Jarrod, could you have Silas bring up some soup and toast for me and
some sandwiches and coffee for Nick.
I’d like some tea.”
“Of course, Mother.”
Father Bernard and Dr. Merar were impressed by Victoria’s command of her
family, and her children’s instant response.
The spirit between the trio was a connection that many families never
felt. It was impressive.
“With that, I will bid you all goodnight,” the lovely lady
said. The men stood nodding their own
good nights while Audra sat down, and put her head on the table and wept until
Jarrod came over to sit down and comfort her.
Upstairs, Victoria went to the bathroom, then stood
outside Heath’s bedroom door. Her head
was buzzing, her thoughts overwhelming.
Nick. Her son, Nick was
home. The idea was difficult to grasp,
but oh so joyful. The question as to why he hadn’t let them know he was alive
nagged at her. So did his
blindness. Was he as angry with his
affliction as Jarrod had been when he was blind. She didn’t think so. Nick
seemed adjusted, able to move fairly independently, just as Jarrod learned
to. She hoped they would help him
adjust to being home and somehow working on the ranch again. As for her youngest son, Victoria tried to
still her heart. Heath wasn’t out of the woods yet. They could still lose him. She wondered in her fatigued mind if she was
going to exchange one son for the other.
Quickly, Victoria drove that thought away. Heath was going to fight.
He was going to recover completely.
This family was not going to give into the tragedies that could have
destroyed them. They would survive and
they would flourish as they had in the past.
Resolute, Victoria Barkley walked into her son’s room and once again
shut the door behind her
Heath’s clasp on Nick hadn’t lessened in the last half
hour, even as he slept. Nick found and
brushed back the blond hair with tender fingers.
“Little Brother, you scared me,” he intoned. “I guess I
didn’t realize how much I missed you till I saw you. Mother, she makes me cringe and feel loved at the same time. I wish you were awake. I really need to talk to you about all
this. I’m not sure how I’ll be able to
help on the ranch. Guess that kept me
coming home too. I’m not the same man,
Heath.”
“Why aren’t you the same man, Nicholas?” Victoria’s voice
asked. Nick heard the rustling of the
fine skirts as his mother stood beside him.
He tried to turn to face her, but Heath’s hand held firm.
“Heath’s deluded,” the young man tried to joke. “Won’t let
me go.”
“Nicholas,” Victoria chided. She sounded angry and hurt.
Nick knew at once, his welcome home had been all too easy. Nick thought
of those days when he felt so all alone, but was unwilling to notify his family
that he had survived the fire. He felt
defensive at his mother’s tone. How could he explain how he felt.
“Mother, I’ve changed,” he started. “The fire changed me.”
“Because you are blind?” Victoria gasped. “For heavens sake, Nicholas, that is
ridiculous. You promised when you came
back after the episode with the wolf that you would never keep a secret like
this again. But you did. You made us think you had perished in that
fire.” Victoria Barkley stood firm, her
heart beating hard inside, her grief and anger of the past several months being
released. Nick had never heard his
mother so incensed.
“I didn’t make you think it. You already did by the time I knew what was going on.”
“Do you decided to let us suffer? Why? How could you?”
“I’d like to know the answer to that one too, Brother
Nick,” Jarrod added coming into the room.
Nick closed his eyes, not that that solved his dilemma. To his surprise, Heath’s hand squeezed his
giving him a little fortification.
“Mother, Heath’s trying to sleep. Can’t we have this discussion later?”
“Heath is awake, Nick,” Jarrod said.
“Oh.” Nick said, not that he didn’t know it, but he didn’t
realize the others did. Victoria pulled
up a chair. She sat down and took
Nick’s other hand in hers. Jarrod stood
behind her. Nick felt backed into a
corner. Only Heath’s strength kept him
from bolting.
“Nick, I pray you never understand what it is to lose a
child. No matter how old your son or
daughter gets, when you believe they are dead a part of you dies with
them.” Again Victoria’s voice
choked. Nick’s stomach felt
queasy. He remained quiet.
“Granted it wasn’t your fault that we believed you had
died in the fire. But there was a body,
and your gun was nearby. What else were
we to think? No one ever hinted you
might have survived. Maybe we all made
mistakes.” Nick knew his mother. She was searching for reasons to take the
blame off him until she would come back to the truth. He had let her down. He
wasn’t surprised when she came to her conclusion, only disheartened.
“In the end, Nick, it was up to you to notify us, to let
us come and help you, to ease your suffering and ours. I won’t speak for your brothers or
sister. I’m certain they have their own
words to speak to you. But I trusted you, Nick to allow your family to share
the good and the bad in your life. I gave
you a second chance. I think it might
be a while before I trust you again not to break my heart.” If Nick Barkley had expected his mother to
tread softly with him because of his compromised situation, he was rudely
awakened. He didn’t cry, but felt as if
the bottom had dropped out of his world, far more devastated than he had been
when he woke up in a black world. The
last thing he ever wanted to do was hurt his mother so deeply.
“Jarrod?” he asked. “You want to have at me too?”
“No, Brother Nick.
I think Mother put it eloquently.”
“I don’t know what to say, except I’m sorry. When I woke up in the hospital, I couldn’t
move at all. I had two broken legs, a
fractured skull and I had been in and out for three weeks. Another three weeks went by before I could
talk. I don’t know what possessed me to
deny having a family when I was asked or giving a false name, but I did. When it finally came time to leave the
hospital, the only place I could think of going was the mission in Monterey
that Heath had told me about. I didn’t
think I could go home after three months.
I was too ashamed.”
“Ashamed? Of what?” Victoria demanded.
“Of not contacting you in the first place,” Nick admitted.
“I told Father Bernard you would have helped me, but I had let you believe the
worst for so long, I thought you’d never want to see me again, especially as
angry as you were after the episode with the wolf.” Heath squeezed Nick’s hand again. Nick knew Heath understood him far better than even Jarrod. They were too of a kind. Silence fell on the room.
“Oh, Sweetheart,” Victoria sighed. She came to sit behind him, hugging him
about the thin waist, placing her head on his back.
“I don’t have to stay…” Nick started.
“Hush,” the mother ordered. “You are not going anywhere.”
Her hug reminded Nick of the safety and security of family, of people who loved
him despite his faults, of people who depended on him for caring and love, of
people who wanted and needed him.
“You mean you want me to stay?” Nick asked. “You just
said…”
“I said you were going to have to prove to me that you
will allow us to help you, Nick, that you trust us enough to confide when you
are hurt or hurting in any way. You
need to love us enough to trust us.”
“I thought I did,” Nick replied. “Maybe I still have some issues of trust like
Little Brother Heath did.”
“Not trust, Nick,” Jarrod said wisely. “Faith, faith in us
and faith in yourself to know that you are fallible and you need us as much as
we need you.” Nick nodded. Victoria
hugged Nick again. He took her hand,
raising it to his lips and kissing it.
“I love you, Mother,” he repeated as he had earlier.
“I love you, Sweetheart,” she answered.
“If you’re done picking on Nick, can I sleep?” Heath
asked. Victoria’s head shot up. She got up and put her hand on Heath’s
forehead.
“My goodness,” she exclaimed.
“What, Mother?” Jarrod and Nick both asked in concern.
“His fever’s broken.
He’s cool. Heath, how do you
feel?”
“Sleepy. My back
hurts like the devil, and my legs are restless.”
“Restless?” Jarrod wondered in confusion. He lifted up the covers at the end of the
bed. He lightly slapped Heath’s leg.
“Ow…what are ya doing, Jarrod?” Heath gasped.
“You felt that?”
“Yeah. Trying to
bust my leg or something.” Jarrod
smiled pulling the covers back over his brother’s lower body. Victoria and Jarrod exchanged glances. Jarrod came over to stand by Nick. He put his hand on his shoulder.
“I’d say we had three miracles here today. With this many, maybe there’ll be another
one, Nick,” he told his brother. Nick’s
smile lit up the room as his eyes filled with tears again.
“Aw, Nick, You’re getting all wet,” Heath teased.
“Stuff it, Little Brother. I’m just tired,” Nick
denied. Victoria turned to the tray
Jarrod had brought in.
“Jarrod, will you help me give Heath some water. I’m sure
he’s thirsty.”
“A little,” Heath admitted, his sapphire eyes sleepy, his
hand still in Nick’s. Nick removed the
appendage not knowing his brother watched his every move.
“Nick, stay.”
“I promise, Little Brother, but do ya mind if I change
clothes? This priest get up is getting old.”
“Nick, I’ll help you after Mother and I finish with
Heath. You can take a bath and get some
fresh clothes.”
“Okay, Pappy.”
Nick’s quick acquiescence showed Jarrod, Victoria and Heath that the man
had learned to accept help at least for now.
Victoria breathed a silent sigh of relief. Heath’s attention was still on Nick as Jarrod lifted him. His eyes widened as his world exploded in
pain.
“Nick!” he cried.
Nick moved on the bed, behind Victoria.
He let Heath grab his hand again.
Heath squeezed it hard as he tried to drink. After getting down a few swallows, he pushed the glass that
Victoria had been giving him away.
“No more,” he begged. “Please, let me lay down.” Heath’s face had turned white when he was
moved. The color gradually came
back. His hand releasing Nick’s let him
know the pain was easing.
“Boy howdy,” the blond breathed. “Reckon I’m gonna need
Nick’s strong back to help me out for awhile.”
“Do you want some laudanum for the pain, Sweetheart?”
Victoria asked. “It will help you sleep.”
“For once, Heath, listen to your mother,” Nick urged. “Else I lose my hand next time you
move.”
“I don’t like it,” Heath complained. “Makes me feel
dopey.”
“There’s a new name for ya,” Nick teased.
“Jarrod, take him out,” Victoria ordered. Jarrod and Heath snickered. Nick let Jarrod lead him away to get cleaned
up and laughed as Heath called after him.
“Bout time you had a bath, Nick.” Victoria shook her head at her son.
“Heath Barkley,” she scolded. She used a teaspoon and gave the young man some laudanum. “Between you and your brother…”
“And you love every minute of it,” Heath returned. “Don’t be too angry with him, Mother. We need him.” Victoria sat on the edge of the bed where Nick had been. She brushed back the blond hair, rubbing the
furrow on Heath’s brow. His forehead
was cool and he hadn’t coughed, she thought.
He could feel his legs. She
dared to hope that soon her family would be back to normal…but she knew their
lives were forever changed.
“Yes, we do need him, Heath, but we were all hurt terribly
while he was gone. You can’t deny
that.”
“No,” Heath mused trying to find a comfortable spot in bed
without success. He grimaced. His mother continued to rub his brow. “That feels good.”
“I’m glad.”
“Mother, what if he never came back? What if we never
knew?” Heath pointed out. Victoria
visibly shuddered. “When it was most
important…he came. He couldn’t deny he
was connected to us, even from a far distance.” Heath’s voice grew sleepy again as the laudanum took effect.
“How can I argue with you when you’re hurt?” Victoria
teased while Heath closed his eyes.
“What would we have done if you never came to us? This family is twice blessed tonight.” Heath opened the blue eyes once more before
he fell asleep.
“You’re the blessing, Mother,” he told her, his body
relaxing a bit as he gave in to slumber.
Tears filled Victoria Barkley’s eyes again. Her family had come through the worst of times. She knew there was a long road of recovery
left for all of them, including herself.
But the connection, the phenomenon that made them family would see them
through. No matter what, they would
preserver because they were family.
Epilogue
Heath’s recovery was slow. When Father Bernard came in to see him, the blond thanked him for
bringing his brother home and knocking some sense into him. He also asked his old friend many questions
about the time Nick had spent at the mission.
Father Bernard was only too happy to share Nick’s time with Heath. He invited both the young men to come to the
mission when Heath was better. He told
Nick he would continue to pray for him and Heath. Nick thanked Father Bernard, but figured he had received the best
answer to his own prayers. He was home,
and that was where he needed to be to feel like the person he was, like Nick
Barkley.
Almost two weeks later, Heath was up and walking on
crutches, his back still painful. He
was enjoying being outside. The sun was
bright overhead and it was warm. He
watched Nick talking with Duke McCall on the porch, not far from him. Nick had quickly resumed his job of running
the ranch. As long as someone was with
him, he showed no fear in undertaking almost any task, from mending fences to
riding. He had talked with Heath,
knowing some of the jobs he used to do were out of the question, such as riding
the broncs, going on a cattle drive or branding, but there was plenty to do on
the ranch and Nick Barkley wasn’t backing off from any of it. Heath was proud of his brother, and
impatient to be able to get back to work as well. He walked carefully down to the dining room where the hands were
having lunch.
“Hey, Heath,” one of the hands called out. “Look who’s up
and around. Got orders for us, Boss.”
“Not today, Rich, but not too long, not too long,” Heath
said. “Mind if I join you fellas? My mother’s fussing is getting on my
nerves.” A general laugh went up from
the men.
“Sure, Heath.
Women can be pretty persnickety when ya ain't able to fight back. I’ll get ya plate of stew and bread,” Dan
answered. He brought Heath a plate of food as promised. Heath listened to the general joshing of the
men. His ears picked up at a conversation
from the table next to him. One of the
hands, a new man named Andy Hall and an older hand, Randy Quaid were talking
about Nick.
“I ain't taking no orders from a blind man,” Andy was
complaining.
“Nick’s a good man, Andy. I’d watch your mouth if I was
you. Nick might be blind but he can
pound you into the ground easy,” Randy warned.
“A blind man? I doubt that. Don’t know which will be worse, taking orders from a crippled
bastard or a blind cowboy.” Heath
stood, fire burning in his eyes and ears.
He used his crutch and pulled Andy’s chair out from under him. Andy fell to the floor amid a general roar
of laughter.
“Everyone out,” Heath ordered. “Unless you plan to apologize for yer foul mouth, Hall.” Andy Hall got to his feet. He looked around at the men watching
him. If he apologized to a cripple, he
reasoned the men would lose all respect for him. He shook his head.
“Not on your life.
I meant what I said.”
“Out,” Heath yelled.
The men hurried. Heath was known
to be the gentler of the two Barkley brothers, but when he got his dander up,
it was best to get out of the way, fast.
The dining room emptied quickly.
“Well, Hall, the way I see it, you can apologize or this
is gonna get nasty,” the blond boss said.
“What is the problem?
Can’t a man say what he thinks around here?” Hall shot back.
“Not when you insult my brother or me. You don’t know us that well, and we’ve done
nothing to earn your disrespect.”
“Ain't done nothing to earn it either, Bastard Boy.” The
Barkley temper exploded. Despite his
condition, Heath launched himself at
Hall. The two men fell to the floor
rolling over pummeling each other.
Heath wasn’t anywhere near as strong as he needed to be. Hall was tall, over six feet and he had
about fifty pounds on Heath. In this
instance, the blond cowboy didn’t have a chance. Hall took a few hits in the face and stomach from Heath, but he
quickly recovered as Heath stood on unsteady feet. He threw out a leg and pulled Heath’s feet out from under
him. Next the hand kicked Heath in the
ribs. Heath groaned in pain, trying to
roll away from the assault. Hall kicked
Heath in the head, stunning him for a few minutes. Figuring he had already lost his job, the irate man went over to
one of the tables and picked up a kerosene lamp. He crashed the lamp on the floor, and struck a match. Heath had struggled to his feet again.
“Hall, don’t,” he yelled.
“Fire!” Hall turned around, picked up a chair and aimed it at Heath as
the flames took hold. Heath grabbed the
chair, and Hall pulled him off his feet again.
Then he took the chair and crashed it over Heath’s head. Writhing in pain on the floor, barely
conscious, Heath didn’t see Hall run out of the dining room. The fire was close, the smoke smarting his
eyes and getting into his lungs. The
smoke quickly blinded the blond cowboy as he used the wall to try and get
up. No one came to help until he fell
to the ground unable to keep standing due to the pain in his head and the
renewed pain in his back. He closed his
eyes, but crawled along the floor. He
had to get out.
“Heath!” Nick’s bellow reached Heath’s ears. “Heath, where are you? Heath, answer me!”
“Here, Nick!” came the desperate plea. “Help.”
Heath never thought about his brother’s blindness. All he thought about was how Nick was always
there for him. “Nick!” With a final gasp, Heath lost
consciousness.
“Nick, we found him,” Duke McCall cried out. “Nick?”
“Here,” Nick said, rubbing his eyes, cursing the smoke and
coughing while he tried to reach his little brother.
“Nick, we have to get him out of here. The whole place is going to come down.”
“I’m here,” Nick cried.
In a second, Nick and Duke had grabbed Heath’s arms. They dragged him out of the burning building
just as an explosion from the kerosene kept in a corner of the dining room blew
the two men forward onto the ground.
Nick was up quickly, ignoring his throbbing head, and the men around
him. He turned to find Heath lying very
still next to him. Turning his brother
over, he checked him for injuries. Duke
appeared on the other side.
“Nick! Heath!” Victoria Barkley cried arriving from the
big house with Jarrod and Audra behind her.
She knelt next to her youngest son.
“Oh, Heath. Nick are you all
right?”
“Yes, Mother,” Nick returned. “I think he’s all right
too. His pulse is good and he might
have taken in some smoke. He’s got some
busted ribs, but he’s breathing.”
“Let’s get him into the house,” Victoria ordered. “Duke,
send one of the men for Dr. Merar.”
Jarrod stepped forward.
“Someone help me with my brother,” he ordered. Many of the
men were fighting the fire. Nick stepped forward.
“I’ll help ya, Pappy,” he offered. Jarrod, Audra, Victoria stared at the dark
cowboy with his black pants and shirt and tousled hair. The empty hazel eyes had been replaced by
intense love and care.
“Nick, what happened?” Audra wondered.
“I don’t know, Sis.”
“You can see,” Victoria breathed. “Dear God in Heaven.” The tiny matriarch hugged her son to
her.
“Mother, we have to help, Heath,” Nick reminded her. Stepping back, crying again, Victoria
allowed her two sons to take Heath into the house. She hugged her daughter, then put her arm around her while they
followed the men into the house. While
Duke and most of the hands worked at controlling the fire, a man was dispatched
to get Dr. Merar. When he arrived,
Heath was awake and protesting being in bed again Dr. Merar examined him.
“Heath, you are one ornery patient,” Dr. Merar scolded.
“Only a fool would take on a fight twelve days after getting shot in the
back. If you don’t stay in this bed for
at least three days, I’ll tie you down myself.”
“And I’ll help him,” Nick growled.
“Nick, you’re a fine one to talk. A blind man running into a fire isn’t that
much smarter than an injured beat up cowboy.”
Heath and Jarrod chuckled, Heath holding his ribs, while Victoria and
Audra smiled, holding back their own amusement.
“Heath, you’ve got some busted ribs and a nasty bump on
the head. You promise to let the
sheriff take care of the man who did this to you and I’ll bind up your ribs.”
“He’s nothing more than a coward,” Heath countered still
angry.
“I’ll take care of it,” Nick said grimly.
“Nick!” Victoria snapped.
“Jarrod can go into town and talk to the sheriff. As for you, you are going to take it easy
for the rest of the day.” Nick didn’t
dare argue. Heath gave Dr. Merar his
word not to go after Hall. Dr. Merar
finished with Heath and then turned his attention to Nick. Nick sat in a chair while the doctor examined
his eyes and lungs.
“Nick, you Barkley’s either have an angel watching over
you or are the most lucky people I’ve ever met. First Jarrod gets his sight back and now you. That’s got to be a first.”
“What brought it back, Doc?” Heath asked for Nick.
“It’s possible going back into a similar situation where
he lost his sight in the first place would explain the return of his
sight. Don’t suppose we’ll ever know
more than we did about Jarrod. You’ll
have some blurry vision for a few days, Nick, but I’m guessing you’ll be back
out on the range in no time.”
“Thanks, Doc,” Nick grinned. “Just what I wanted to
hear. Heath, soon as you’re ready,
we’re going on round up.” Heath pulled
his covers over him.
“Uh, not just now, Big Brother. Reckon I ought to get me some sleep before you get a chance to
work me into the ground again rebuilding the dining room or something.”
“Oh, we’ll just blindfold Nick and he can show us how
handy he really is in the dark,” Jarrod finished.
“Counselor, if you want to try me…” Nick growled.
Jarrod looked at the relieved and happy faces of his
family. His blue eyes met his brother’s
hazel gaze, seeing the laughter behind the words. He looked down at Heath who gave him a lopsided grin. He slapped Nick on the back.
“Any time, Brother Nick, any time,” he returned.
“Might as well go out there and see what the damage is,”
Nick offered. Heath groaned pulling the
pillow over his face and then putting it back.
His mother had taken Nick by the arm.
“Nicholas, if you leave this house again today without
taking a bath and a nap, I’ll take my wooden spoon to you,” she
threatened. “Good night, Heath.”
“Good night, Mother,” Heath returned, his body shaking in
silent laughter. He held his ribs with
the pillow as he hollered out. “Be a
good boy, Nicky.” Nick’s loud bellow
echoed through the house as his mother led him away.
“You’ll regret that Dopey!” Jarrod and Audra fell into each other’s arms laughing as
well. Heath simply put his hands under
his blankets, enjoying the warm comfort on his sore back and ribs. Nick was home. His big brother was home at last…and the phenomenon called love
would never let them be separated again.