Overwhelmed

by Janet

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission.  No copyright infringement is intended by the author.  The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

 

 

 

 

Prologue

 

“Mother,” twelve and a half year old Jarrod Barkley said as he looked at his mother, Victoria, “you can’t do this to me.  I’m not ready to take on anymore responsibility.  I’m just now getting used to having baby doll Audra here. Please don’t do this to me.  I beg you. You don’t know what this is going to do to me.  Please don’t.”

 

“I’m sorry Jarrod,” she replied as she sat in the living room of the Barkley mansion looking at her oldest son.  “There’s nothing that I can do to stop it.  It’s already happened.  You will just have to accept it. Your father and I are very happy about this.  Why can’t you be happy for us?  That’s all I’m asking of you.”

 

“I can’t!” he cried standing up and running out of the room.

 

Victoria shook her head as she watched him run upstairs to his bedroom and slam the door. She knew it would be hard for him to completely understand but she had hoped he would try to understand how she felt but it hadn’t turned out that way.  And now her son was running away from his fears and afraid to accept the happiest news that she could have given him.

 

“What in the world was that?” Tom asked as he walked out of the study where he had been working.  “It sounded like Nick but I know that’s impossible because he’s over at Tim Millers’ house.  What’s going on? And what was that noise?”

 

“Tom,” she answered standing up from where she had been sitting, “we have a huge problem.  I don’t know how to fix it either. I thought when I told him he would be happy but he wasn’t.  In fact, he was very upset and afraid.  I don’t know how to help him either because I’m not sure why he’s acting this way.”

 

“Victoria,” he said looking at her, “I don’t understand.  What made that awful noise and why do you look so upset? And who are you talking about?”

 

Victoria looked up the stairs toward her oldest son’s room.  She knew he would have to come to grips with the news sooner or later.  She hoped that it would be sooner.

 

“Jarrod made that noise,” she said looking at him.  “He’s very upset and angry. I’m not sure exactly why he is.  I thought he would be delighted when I told him but you can see for yourself what happened. I just don’t understand why it happened this way.”

 

“What about?” he asked looking at her.  “I don’t understand what he could be so upset about. Tell me Victoria.  What is this all about?”

 

“I just told him about the new baby coming in about eight months,” she answered shaking her head.  “He just lost it all Tom.  I’m not sure why.  I didn’t get a chance to ask him. He ran out of the room before I could stop him. He kept telling me that he couldn’t handle it again.  I’m not exactly sure what he meant by that either.”

 

Tom realized that he and his wife needed to get to the bottom of this right now.

 

“Come on,” he said as he started up the stairs.  “We need to find out why he’s so upset and angry. There has to be a reason and I’m going to find out what that reason is. And if we wait it could make it a whole lot worse for him and for us.”

 

“I’m not sure this is a good idea,” she replied following him up the stairs.  “When he gets this way he won’t talk. You know that.  He locks everything up inside and it eats away at him. It could eventually destroy him if he doesn’t talk about it though.”

 

“He will when I get finished with him,” he told her.  “I won’t have him talking that way to his mother. Or for that matter the way he just acted is appalling for a boy of his age.  He knows better than to slam doors. I don’t know what’s gotten into him but his attitude will change.  I can promise you that.”

 

“It wasn’t his fault,” she said stopping in the upstairs hallway.  “Tom, there’s something really bothering him about the new baby.  I just don’t know what.  I know that he is or was pleased with Audra the day she was born. Although at first he had some doubts but he got over them.  He calls her a doll. He loves to sit with her and read to her but when I told him about this baby he completely fell apart.  Why?”

 

“Well,” he replied walking down the hall to his son’s room, “I’m going to find out what it is. And believe me that boy will tell me. I mean that.”

 

“Tom,” she told him, “please be careful.  Jarrod is in a very rough emotional state right now.  If we push him too hard we can push him away.”

 

“I know that,” he said turning to look at her.  “But we have to know why and he’s the only one that can tell us.”

 

Tom didn’t knock.  He opened the door and walked inside followed by his wife.  They found Jarrod sitting in the corner of his room on the floor with his knees up in front of him.  He had been crying.

 

“Honey,” she said kneeling down in front of him, “nothing can be this bad.  Let us help you.  Tell us what’s bothering you about the new baby. I never realized that the news would upset you so much.  All we want to do is help you.”

 

Jarrod didn’t look at her but the tears flowed down his cheeks.  He finally nodded.

 

“I can’t take care of another one,” he said pointedly.  “I’m not able to be responsible for another one. It’s too much for me to bear.  I can’t!  I can’t!”

 

“Son,” Tom replied squatting down, “you aren’t making any sense.  We can’t help you until we know what’s wrong. Calm down and tell us why you’re acting this way.  Then we can help you.”

 

Jarrod finally looked up at them.  He couldn’t control his emotions any longer.  He just cried as hard as he could.

 

“It’s all right,” she said moving over to sit next to him.  “Don’t cry honey.  I want to help you. Nothing can be this bad.  You should be happy to have another little brother or sister to help take care of.”

 

She held him in her arms as he cried.  A few minutes later he raised his head looking at her.

 

“Why did I have to be the oldest?” he asked shaking his head.  “I can’t look after another little brother or sister.  Nick and Audra are too much for me now. I just can’t do it any longer.  I can’t!”

 

Both Tom and Victoria realized why he had been so upset.  They looked at each other.

 

“Son,” Tom answered looking into Jarrod’s swollen eyes, “you’re not alone.  You have your mother, Silas and me.  You don’t have to do anything alone. If you don’t feel comfortable helping with the new baby, then you don’t have to.  I want you to be happy.”

 

“You don’t understand,” he cried turning away from them.  “I’m always going to be the big brother.  I’m always going to be the one they come to when they are in trouble or hurt or sick.  I’m always going to be the one who has to get them out of situations they get into.  Don’t you see?  I’m the one they look up to. I just can’t handle that again.  Not again.”

 

“Jarrod,” she said holding him again, “I understand what you’re saying.  You believe that you will be overwhelmed when the new baby is born.  You think that you’re going to be the one who has to keep it in line like you have Nick and like you will with Audra. Is that right?”

 

“Yes,” he replied nodding.  “I can’t do it anymore.  Nick has worn me out.  I’ve had to pull him out of one fight or mess after another.  The thoughts of another one depending on me is too much for me to bear. I have other things to spend my time doing.  If I want to pursue a career in something, I have to have the time to study and not have to run after a little brother or sister.”

 

“I understand,” she told him.  “I can’t change the fact that you are the oldest.  I can’t change the fact that your brother and sister will come to you when they won’t come to us.  But you are not alone.  You have help.  We will help you every way we can and you can also turn to God for help.”

 

“I appreciate that mother,” he said smiling.  “You know Nick is bad enough with his infernal yelling, arguing, fighting and getting into trouble.  I look forward to helping Audra.  She is a doll and I love her very much.  But what if this new baby is a boy just like Nick.”

 

“Oh I hope not,” Tom replied smiling slightly.  “I don’t think I could handle two like him.  He’s enough of a handful.”

 

“I agree,” he told his father.  “You don’t know how’s it been in school with his pension for getting into trouble and who do you think the teacher depends on to get him out of it?  Me.  I can’t do that with another one. I just don’t have the energy to do it nor do I care to.  I’ve had my fill with Nick.”

 

“All right Jarrod,” she said still holding him.  “We’ll have a talk with Nick about his actions and see if he will try not to worry you so much.  As for the new baby, I have an idea.”

 

“What?” he asked looking at her.

 

“Why don’t you just forget about it until it comes,” she answered smiling at him.  “Then if it turns out to be just like Nick, you don’t have to have anything to do with it.  But if it doesn’t and you like it you can help me if you wish.”

 

“I can do that mother,” he said smiling.  “I can do that.  You will have a talk with Nick father.”

 

“Yes,” Tom replied nodding.  “You can count on it.”

 

Jarrod visibly relaxed and stood up.

 

“I’m sorry for the way I acted earlier mother,” he said looking at her.  “I didn’t mean to take it out on you. None of this is your fault.  You can’t help how Nick is.”

 

“It’s all right honey,” she replied putting her arm around him.  “Let’s just forget about it for now.”

 

 

 

Chapter One

 

“Nick,” Tom said as he met his son when he came home that evening, “I want to have a word with you in the study. It’s very important son.”

 

Nick looked around the coral area not understanding why his father wanted to talk to him.  He didn’t think he had done anything to warrant his parents being upset or angry with him but he wasn’t sure.

 

“All right father,” Nick replied climbing down from his horse.  “Just let me put him away and then I’ll be in.”

 

“Rusty can do that,” he told his son.  “Now Nick.”

 

Nick followed his father into the house.   He still wondered what was wrong. Usually his father would tell him what he had done wrong but his father wasn’t saying a word.

 

“Nick,” he said as he pointed to a chair in the room, “your mother and I want to talk to you about something very important. I want you to listen first and not interrupt.”

 

“Yes father,” Nick replied seeing his mother sitting on the couch as he sat down.  “What’s wrong? What have I done?”

 

“We’ve just had a discussion with Jarrod,” she told him omitting the fact that it wasn’t exactly a discussion at all.  “It seems he’s quite upset at the fact that I’m going to have another baby in eight months.”

 

“Why would that bother him?” Nick asked looking confused.  “He seemed happy when Audra was born. He even got to deliver her for the doctor.”

 

“He was happy,” she answered looking toward Tom.  “But things have changed. And it has to do with you.”

 

“Me?” Nick wanted to know.  “Why me?  I’ve not done anything to make him mad at me.  At least not lately.”

 

“It seems that you have a lot to do with him being upset,” he said picking up for her.  “Jarrod feels that he cannot handle another little brother if he turns out to be anything like you. And I can’t say that I blame him either.”

 

“I don’t understand,” Nick said shaking his head.  “What have I done?  I don’t bother him that much.”

 

“You don’t?” she asked looking at his face.  “Then why does Jarrod feel that all he does is try to fix what you tear up.”

 

“Mother,” Nick answered looking even more confused, “I still don’t know what you mean. What are you trying to say about Jarrod?  Please tell me.”

 

“All right,” he said looking at his son.  “You are continually getting into trouble at school and you expect Jarrod to get you out of it.  You are getting into fights too and then you expect Jarrod to help you with them.  You won’t do your homework but you expect Jarrod to help you with it.  You argue continuously with him over little things that mean nothing.”

 

“So,” Nick replied standing up.  “That’s what he’s there for. I’ve known that all my life and that’s why I always go to him first.”

 

“No,” she told him.  “That’s not what Jarrod is there for.  He’s your older brother but he has a life of his own to lead.  He needs to concentrate on doing what he wants to do.  He doesn’t need to keep running after you so we don’t have to. He feels obligated to help you with whatever you get involved in no questions asked.  And if you keep running to him for help all the time he’s never going to accomplish anything but clean up after you. You don’t realize what you’re doing to him.”

 

“You’re getting older son,” he said standing up.  “You need to realize that for every action you do there is a consequence.  Jarrod can’t keep helping you when you won’t even try to help yourself.  He’s going to be leaving here one day and then what are you going to do?”

 

Nick sat there thinking about what they had said.

 

“I guess I have relied on Jarrod a lot,” Nick said nodding.  “I guess I didn’t realize that he had things that he had to do.  I didn’t mean to make him mad at me. I wouldn’t do that for the world.  I love Jarrod and I hope that he knows that I do. But he always helped me out.  He could have said no but he didn’t.”

 

“He’s not angry with you,” she replied smiling.  “He just feels it’s time for you to take on your own responsibilities on your own without his help and then if you get into trouble I’m sure he’ll be there to help.  But you have to try first.”

 

“Do you understand what we’re saying son?” he asked stopping in front of Nick.  “Jarrod is very important to us as well as you and Audra.  We want him to be happy and he’s not.  He’s afraid that the new baby will be just like you.  He feels that it will rely on him too much to take care of everything it needs. And he can’t handle all of that along with making a life for himself.  He needs freedom and he needs it desperately.”

 

“I understand,” Nick answered nodding.  “I’m sorry I didn’t think before going to Jarrod.  It’s just that he is so understanding when I mess up.  He doesn’t ball me out as bad as you do.  Oh he gets mad but then he remembers messing up himself and he calms down some. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt Jarrod.  I hope you know that.”

 

“I’m glad you think he ‘s that special,” he said smiling.  “From now on, you try to fix your problems first yourself and then if you can’t you can come to us and then to Jarrod.”

 

“I will,” Nick replied standing up.  “I’m sorry for hurting him.  I didn’t mean to.  Jarrod is my brother and he’s very special.  I wouldn’t do anything to hurt him for the world.”

 

“We know that sweetheart,” she told him.  “Now you go on.”

 

Nick left the room.  He stood outside in the hallway before he headed upstairs to find his brother.

 

“Jarrod,” Nick asked as he knocked on his brother’s bedroom door, “can I see you a minute? It won’t take long but I need to talk to you.”

 

“The door’s open,” he answered not bothering to get up from where he lay reading on the bed.

 

Nick walked inside and Jarrod sat up.

 

“I came here to talk to you a minute,” Nick said as he walked over to where his brother was.  “I actually came here to say I’m sorry.”

 

“For what?” he asked completely confused.

 

“I had a long talk with mother and father about how you feel and I wanted you to know that I never meant to hurt you Jarrod,” Nick answered not looking at Jarrod.  “I always thought you would be there to help me.  I never realized that you had a life of your own to lead. I’m sorry that I kept coming to you over and over again but it sure beat going to father and getting into more trouble.”

 

“I never meant for mother and father to get angry with you over this,” he said looking at his brother.  “I just didn’t want to think about having to do the same thing with another brother that’s all.”

 

“They weren’t all that mad,” Nick replied nodding.  “In fact, they were very understanding.  They made me realize that I’ve been taking up far too much of your time with my problems.  Looking back I could have handled a lot of them on my own but you were there.  I’m really sorry.”

 

“It’s all right,” he told his brother.  “You need help from time to time.  But sometimes you walk right into things that you shouldn’t. You need to think before you do.”

 

“I know,” Nick said nodding.  “You know something?  I wish I could be more like you.”

 

“Huh?” he asked looking at Nick confused.  “Why on earth would you want to be more like me?”

 

“Because,” Nick answered smiling, “you can handle any problem that comes along.  I don’t care how little or how big it is you can look at it and then you can figure out how to handle it.  I wish I knew how to do that.”

 

“Well,” he said turning away, “it’s not always easy.  I’ve had my troubles too.  I have made a lot of mistakes but I try to learn from them.  In that way, I know the next time what to do or not to do.”

 

“Yeah,” Nick replied nodding.  “That’s what I mean.  You’re special Jarrod.  I’m proud to be your brother.”

 

“Thanks for the compliment,” he told Nick.  “You’re not so bad yourself.”

 

“Can we be friends again as well as brothers?” Nick asked very genuinely.

 

“Sure we can,” he answered smiling at his brother.  “I can’t stay angry with you for long.”

 

“You want to play or ride or something?” Nick asked hopefully.

 

“Maybe later,” he answered holding up his book.  “I want to finish this first.”

 

“All right,” Nick said as he headed out the door.

 

 

 

Chapter Two

 

Eight months had now passed and the new baby was due within the next two weeks.  Everything up to this point for Jarrod had been better but as the time for the birth of the baby grew near, he began to withdraw again.

 

“Tom,” she said as they sat in the living room, “Jarrod is thinking about the baby again.  He doesn’t talk about it but I can see it in his face.  He’s very quiet and he doesn’t venture out much. I know that he’s starting to worry about what kind of baby it will be and I’m afraid he will lose it again like he did almost a year ago.”

 

“I didn’t like his attitude then and I don’t like it now,” he replied looking up from his reading.  “He has to come to grips with this.  That’s all there is to it.”

 

“Why is it Tom that when we start to discuss Jarrod you have to make comments like that?” she asked hatefully.  “Jarrod has a right to be nervous and overwhelmed.  He is the oldest child and as the oldest he has an obligation to look after his younger siblings.  We may not like that fact but it’s true. And as the oldest he’s had more than his share of looking after his younger brother.  You should know that.  Nick has just about run him crazy over nine years of living.  Jarrod doesn’t need that and he doesn’t need to worry about something that should be a happy occasion for him.”

 

“I’m not putting the boy down Victoria,” he answered shaking his head.  “I mean that if Jarrod is still having trouble over this matter, why doesn’t he just come to us and we can sit down to discuss it like civilized adults. That’s all he has to do.  What’s wrong with that?”

 

“Because Tom,” she said looking at him, “Jarrod is not an adult yet.  He’s just thirteen and a half.  That’s not grown up by no means and to answer your question, he doesn’t come to us because you don’t listen to what he has to say. The minute he starts to say something you start in on him for something else entirely.  Think about him for once in your life.”

 

“When have I never listened to what he’s said?” he asked looking angry.  “I try to help him whenever he needs help. But he rarely comes to me any more.  He did when he was small but not now.”

 

“Have you ever thought about the reason why?” she shot back at him.  “You have more than enough time for Nick and now for your only daughter but Jarrod has fell through the cracks.  He knows you don’t want to spend time with him and he’s accepted that fact. And he’s trying to go on with his life the best he can without your help or guidance.”

 

“Now wait just a minute,” he said standing up.  “I have never in my life ignored my oldest son.  It’s true I spend more time with Nick but that’s only because he’s going to succeed me on this ranch and I want him to be ready.  But I’m always there when Jarrod needs me.”

 

“Tom,” she asked looking up at him, “do you remember the episodes with Richard Jordan? The kidnapping, the shooting, the severe beating he took.”

 

“Yes,” he answered sitting back down.  “How can I ever forget that man?  He nearly tore this family apart. And he nearly took something from me that I dearly love.  Why bring him up?”

 

“All right,” she said treading carefully.  “Do you remember after the shooting of Jarrod the worry he had about your safety? He was so afraid that you would be killed that he almost didn’t heal because he worried so much.”

 

“Of course,” he replied nodding.  “He wouldn’t let me out of his sight for fear that I would be killed.  What’s this got to do with the baby?”

 

“I’m getting to that,” she told him.  “He was very worried about you but since that time you two have drifted apart.  You don’t do anything together any longer.  You don’t sit and talk any longer. Why don’t you want to spend time with your son Tom?  He needs you but he won’t admit it because he feels that you would only push him away further.”

 

“All right,” he said cutting her off.  “I see your point.  I should be spending quality time with him.  But there is so much that has to be done. I have so much to show Nick and the ranch work is piling up.”

 

“Let him help you,” she replied hoping her idea would draw them closer.  “Let him begin to see the business side of running this ranch.  Who knows?  You might just have someone who can help Nick with that part of it. Because if you don’t start including him in your life you won’t have him at all.”

 

Tom thought about what his wife had just said.  He nodded at her.

 

“I’ll talk to him first thing in the morning,” he said knowing that it wouldn’t be easy.  “There’s nothing I can do tonight. You do have some valid points though.  Maybe I am spending far too much time with Nick.  I don’t know.  But I will see about it tomorrow. In the meantime I need to make sure you take it easy.”

 

“I’m fine,” she replied smiling.  “Really I am.”

 

“You may say you are fine,” he told her, “but it’s been a long year.  You’re trying to take care of Audra along with having this baby.  For goodness sake, let Silas help you.  That’s why he’s here.  He loves the boys and thinks the world of Audra.  Let him help.”

 

“All right,” she said nodding.  “I’ll do as you say as long as you talk to Jarrod before it’s too late.”

 

“I promise I will,” he replied looking at her.  “I know my responsibility as a father have slipped toward him but we will get through this.  I know we will.”

 

“I hope so,” she told him.  “I truly hope so for Jarrod’s sake as well as yours.”

 

 

 

Chapter Three

 

The next morning Tom found Jarrod sitting at the table in the dining room eating his breakfast.  He got his plate and sat down beside his son. It had been a long time since the two of them had eaten a meal together alone.

 

“We haven’t sat down and talked in a long time,” Tom said as he looked at his son.  “You’re nearly grown and I don’t even know what you’re going to do when you finish school. Have you made any plans?  Do you know what you want to do?”

 

“What do you care?” he asked angrily.  “You don’t have any time for me.  All you have time for is Nick. And don’t tell me that you’re grooming him for the ranch.  I’m well aware of that.  But I’m your son too.  Don’t I count for anything?”

 

“That’s not true son,” Tom answered calmly.  “I’m sorry for taking so much time with Nick.  But it’s been a chore for him to grasp the business side of this ranch.  In fact, to tell you the truth, he hasn’t.  I’m very worried about the ranch’s assets with Nick in charge of them. You are very important to me.  I love you Jarrod but you’ve taken to school so easily and Nick hasn’t.  I’ve tried to help him more because he really needs that help.  You’re able to handle things on your own but I’m still here if and when you have a concern or a problem.  You must know that.”

 

“That’s true,” he said smiling.  “Nick hates school so why should he care about learning what he will need for that part. He just doesn’t care about studying.  I know that you love me and care about me.  But I still would like to know that you are there.  You stay so busy with Nick and the ranch that I hardly ever see you except at a meal.  I know we haven’t sat down and talked about things.  I regret that.  I want to tell you about my life but I don’t know where to begin.”

 

“I’m glad you agree,” Tom replied looking at Jarrod.  “I was wondering if you weren’t too busy would you like to learn how it’s done?  Maybe someday if you want to you can help Nick with that part of it. I’m listening now son.  You tell me what you want to do after school.  You tell me anything you wish too and I’ll help you what I can.”

 

“You’re asking me?” he asked completely shocked.  “I haven’t even considered working on the ranch at all.  I thought I might move somewhere else to live.  Well, other than moving away I haven’t been able to figure out what I want to study at college.  I do want to go if you don’t have any objections.  I don’t even know where I want to go.”

 

“I know that son,” Tom answered nodding.  “But you won’t be gone forever and Nick is desperately going to need help in the worst way. So, you want to go to college.  I think that’s a wonderful idea.  You are a very bright young man and you will go far in this world.  As for what you want to study, I can’t offer much help.  I never went to school myself.  I’m not up on what your interests are either.  For that I’m very sorry.”

 

“That’s true,” he said laughing.  “I’ll tell you this much.  I’ll think about it and let you know.  I’m not asking you to decide for me sir.  I’m only telling you that I haven’t come up with a career plan as of yet but when I do you will be the first to know.  I thought about maybe going back east to college but I don’t know.  That’s a pretty far distance to go.  I’ll have to think about it some more and then let you know.”

 

“All right,” Tom replied nodding.  “I can wait for your decision.  After all, it’s a big decision for you to make and I want you to be absolutely sure that you will be happy in whatever you choose to do.  I mean that son.  In the mean time do you think you could give your mother a hand?”

 

“You mean with the baby?” he wanted to know. “I know you care father.  I didn’t mean to sound like I didn’t.  But it’s been a rough year and I’ve had a lot on my mind.  I’m sorry that I didn’t come to you sooner but I don’t know.”

 

“Yes,” Tom answered.  “I know you’re having apprehensions again but I want you to try to put them aside to help her. It’s all right Jarrod.  Everything will work out I promise you.  Right now, we need to help your mother.”

 

“I’ll try,” he said nodding.  “That’s all I can say for now.”

 

“All right,” Tom replied smiling.  “That’s all I’m asking.”

 

Later that morning after Jarrod had left the ranch for school, Victoria caught Tom in the study.

 

“Did you talk to him yet?” she asked as she walked into the room. “Did you straighten everything out?”

 

“Yes,” he answered looking up from his work.  “We had a talk. I’m hopeful that he will help you with the baby.  I don’t know for sure.”

 

“What did he say?” she asked as she stopped in front of the desk where Tom sat.  “Did you ask him about college and his plans?”

 

“He’s going to think about it,” he answered continuing to work.  “And I agreed that I would wait to hear from him.  Yes we discussed his plans.  He wants to attend college but he’s not sure where.  And he doesn’t know what he wants to study.  I told him that was all right.  He has plenty of time to make that decision.”

 

“Tom,” she said trying desperately to get his attention, “I want to know what was said. All that was said.  Please tell me the rest.

 

“He said he would think about learning the business side,” he replied laying his pen down.  “He knows that Nick is not going to be a businessman like I am but he won’t commit to helping him at this point.  The two of them have had issues of late and they need to work them out before Jarrod can decide. And he said that he would try to help you with the baby.”

 

“At least that’s a start,” she told him.  “I hope we can persuade him to make the right decision about the baby and his role in its life.  Tom, do you think he will come to you now that you two have cleaned the air of any potential problem? ”

 

“You want him to decide for himself don’t you?” he asked looking at her.  “I think we need to let him think about it and then he’ll give us his answer. Yes we have made up so to speak but he’s growing up and spreading his wings.  He doesn’t need us hovering over him asking him every few minutes what his answer is.  He’ll let us know when he is ready.”

 

“I suppose you’re right,” she answered nodding.  “I just wish I knew exactly how he really felt about everything. It worries me when I see him so upset and worried about things.”

 

“In time he’ll tell us,” he said nodding.  “I know it does but he will come to us when he’s ready.  I’m sure of it.”

 

She nodded hoping that was true.

 

 

 

Chapter Four

 

“Tom,” she said as she looked over at him sitting at his desk a week later, “it’s time. I need you to go and get Dr. Merrar.  Hurry Tom.  Please.”

 

“I’m not going to get Dr. Merrar,” he replied standing up.  “I’m going to send one of the hands to do it.  I want to be right here just in case something should happen.”

 

“Will you help me to my room?” she asked as she stood up.  “I want to lie down until he comes. I believe I will feel better if I do.”

 

Tom helped his wife to their room.

 

“You lie here until I can go send one of the hands for the doctor,” he said as he turned to leave the room.  “I’ll be right back.”

 

“All right,” she replied trying to relax.  “Just don’t take too long.”

 

“I won’t,” he told her as he left.

 

Tom saw one of the hands near the barn as he walked out the door.  He walked over to him.

 

“Jacobs,” he said as he recognized the man, “I need you to ride into Stockton and bring the doctor out here.  Tell him it’s time.”

 

“That’s all you want me to say boss,” Jacobs replied somewhat confused.  “I don’t understand.”

 

“That’s all you need to say,” he told his hired hand.  “The doctor will know what it means.”

 

“Yes sir,” Jacobs said heading into the barn to saddle his horse.

 

Tom returned to the house.  As he entered the bedroom, Victoria looked over at him.

 

“I wish the boys were here to see this,” she said as she laid on the bed.  “I need to know how Jarrod will accept this.  Why couldn’t this baby wait until they were home from school?  I just hope that Jarrod will take the news all right.  He hasn’t given us his answer as of yet and I’m worried about how he will take the news.”

 

“We’ll find out shortly,” he replied sitting down beside of her.  “Jarrod has grown a lot in the last eight months.  I don’t think he’s going to come apart like he did when he first heard the news.  I really don’t think there’s anything to worry about.”

 

“I hope you’re right,” she told him.  “I don’t want him to resent this baby because of his feelings toward what Nick’s done to him already.  It’s going to be hard for him to have to run after another little one if it does turn out to be more like Nick than him.”

 

“That’s true,” he said nodding.  “But I believe in my heart that Jarrod will take to this baby right off.”

 

“I hope you’re right,” she replied starting to hurt worse.  “I do wish the doctor would hurry.”

 

A short time later the doctor arrived.

 

“Well,” the doctor said as he walked into the bedroom, “I believe that a new baby is wanting to make an appearance in the world.”

 

“I’m afraid so,” she replied trying to handle the intense pain.  “Not that I’m unhappy about the birth.  I am.  But I just wish it was all over.”

 

“It will be soon,” the doctor told her smiling.

 

It didn’t take long for the baby to come.  The doctor looked up holding a small bundle in his arms.  He showed it to the proud parents.

 

“You have a son Tom,” the doctor said turning to look at Tom.  “He’s a healthy boy. I’ll get him cleaned up and give him to his mother.”

 

“That’s great news doc,” he replied looking at his newest son.  “Did you hear that Victoria?  A boy.”

 

“Yes,” she told him trying to stay happy but feeling sad for Jarrod.  “I just hope that Jarrod will accept him.  I want him to enjoy his newest brother.”

 

“He will when he sees him,” he said smiling.  “Just wait and see.”

 

Jarrod and Nick came in a short time later from school.

 

“I wonder where mother is,” Nick said as they walked in the door.  “I don’t see her anywhere and she usually meets us when we get home.”

 

“I don’t know,” he replied looking around.  “Maybe she’s resting.”

 

“Sure that’s it,” Nick told him.  “She has to be lying down.  I keep forgetting that she is going to have another baby.”

 

“I can’t,” he said showing his anger and hurt.  “I’m so afraid about this baby Nick.  I can’t tell you how I feel.”

 

“I thought you were feeling better about it,” Nick replied looking at Jarrod.  “You’ve seemed happier lately.  What’s wrong now?”

 

“I don’t know for sure,” he told his brother.  “I just wonder what it will be like I guess.”

 

“Quit worrying,” Nick said smiling.  “It hasn’t even been born yet.”

 

“Boys,” Tom replied as he came out into the hallway after hearing the door close, “your mother and I have some news to tell you. I hope you both will be as happy as we are.”

 

“You had the baby,” Nick told him hurrying up the stairs. “That’s why mother wasn’t there to meet us.”

 

“Yes,” Tom said smiling at his sons.  “It’s a boy. A fine son.  You must come and see him and your mother of course.”

 

Jarrod didn’t attempt to go upstairs. He just stood there in the foyer and tried to get his emotions under control.  In reality he was afraid to see the baby.  He didn’t want to know if it was like Nick or not.

 

“Son,” Tom said looking at his son, “come on and see it. You’ll be surprised when you do.”

 

Slowly Jarrod made his way into the room.  He didn’t walk over to the bed still fighting his own emotions.

 

“Jarrod,” she said when she saw him, “come here honey.  You have to see him.  It’s very important Jarrod.  Please.”

 

He slowly made his way over to the bed stood there looking down at the little bundle. He didn’t hear any crying and noticed that the baby seemed to be awake.

 

“It’s a boy,” she said smiling.  “A very quiet boy.  Jarrod, he doesn’t cry very much.”

 

Jarrod finally smiled upon realizing what his mother had just said.

 

“He doesn’t cry much,” he said looking at his new brother.  “That means that he won’t be loud like Nick.  What a relief.”

 

“No he doesn’t,” she replied smiling. “I was hoping that you would accept him once you knew how quiet he was.  He’s going to need his big brother.”

 

“I know,” he told her. “I hope that I can help him.”

 

“What’s his name?” Nick asked. “Come on and tell us.”

 

“Jarrod,” she answered, “Nick, I would like you to meet your brother Eugene Patrick Barkley.  We named him after your grandfather. We’re going to call him Eugene or Gene.”

 

“Eugene,” he said looking at the little boy.  “I like that name mother.  And I love him too. He’s quite a boy.”

 

“I was hoping you would,” she replied smiling. “Now our family is complete.  Your father and I have four wonderful children and we are so proud of each and every one of them.”

 

“That’s for sure,” Tom told them.  “I couldn’t be anymore happy than I am right now.”

 

“Maybe this news will make you even happier,” he said looking at both of his parents.  “I’ve thought a lot about our talk the other morning and I’ve decided to accept your offer to teach me the business side of the ranch.”

 

“Oh Jarrod,” she replied smiling broadly.  “I’m so happy that you are.”

 

“I am too son,” Tom told him.  “I’ll do my best to help you learn it all.”

 

“I know you will,” he said smiling.

 

 

 

THE END