Expectations

by Leona (Heathisforme)

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission.  No copyright infringement is intended by the author.  The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

 

 

 

 

Jarrod was a man of sustenance.  He loved his family with a passion like no other.  He would do anything for them as they would for him.  He brought his family out of the depths of despair in those early days of his father’s death.  He had to, he was the oldest, and  it was expected of him. He held his mother when the news came, comforted his sister as she wept the tears of  pure grief.  He talked in quiet tones with Nick and Eugene, using words to ease the intense grief.  He had nothing left for himself.  He held that grief in while he did what was expected of him.

 

He thought of later when everyone had grown up more.  Nick had always run the ranch with his father and now that he was gone, Nick took over.  He ruled the ranch smartly, just like Tom, and all the hands respected him for that.  Then Heath entered the picture and things changed.  Nick was furious when he arrived.  His father, a kind generous man, would not do what this man said he did, he yelled. This man was not my brother!  Jarrod talked to him as was expected of him.  Eventually Nick accepted the fact that the blond man was his brother, and they became friends.

 

He helped Eugene realize his dream of becoming a doctor and now he was practicing medicine in Boston.  Jarrod was proud of him, so much like himself but yet so different.  Eugene was doing so well in his profession he had no time to come home a lot. He hadn’t been home in a few years and Jarrod missed his little brother.

 

Audra was well becoming a woman of the world, helpful and generous if not a little bit spoiled.  He helped spoiling her, he couldn’t help it.  She was his sister and she looked up to him for guidance and support.  He took on the responsibility because it was expected of him.

 

Heath came to the house one night claiming to be his father’s illegitimate son.  It took some convincing on Heath’s part to make them believe that he was part of the family but the family looked to Jarrod for explanations.  He gave what he thought was a good one, because it was expected of him. The family expected no less from him. 

 

Even his mother, Victoria, came to rely on him for strength.  And he gave it willingly, he loved his mother but again he did what was expected of him.  He gave what they wanted, no more, no less. 

 

Jarrod thought of these things as his birthday approached.  All of his life, he wanted to do something irrational, something that he wasn’t expected to do.  Something that was so totally out of character for him, that would be a shock to everyone.  He smiled as he thought of this.  His fortieth birthday, what better time than now?

 

He packed a bag to go out of town.  He was going to Fresno and live out his dream.  No expectations out of him this night.  He told his family he was going down there for an important case and to meet him there to help him celebrate his birthday since the case would take that long. 

 

He took the midnight train arriving in Fresno early in the morning.  He found the hotel he was to stay at and checked in.  He climbed the carpeted stairs to his room and opened the door.  He placed his bag on  the dressing table, looking about the room.  It was tastefully furnished, right down to the bed in the centre of the room.  He laid down his large, tired frame.  He smiled as he thought of his grand plan to surprise his family.  They thought they were coming to help him celebrate his birthday but in reality they were to see him celebrate his dream.

 

Nick looked at the tickets that Jarrod had given him before he left.  “Circus tickets?  He gave us circus tickets?”  He looked puzzled.  “We are supposed to meet him at the CIRCUS?”  The whole family smiled and tried to look impressed as they all pondered at the tickets.  He had told them to meet them at seven o’clock in the main tent. His meeting with the client would last till then. 

 

They got to the circus main tent at the right time and sat down in the front seats. Jarrod would be here anytime they thought.  The circus had started and still no Jarrod, so they sat and watched the animals do their tricks.  They watched the trapeze artists do their stunts then the clowns came out.  They did their tricks and one clown looked really familiar.  He stood in a familiar stance.  His laughter rung out like someone they knew.

 

The family looked at one another.  Could it be? they wondered out loud to one another. “Jarrod a CLOWN?” Surely that couldn’t be, they thought. The clown with the painted frown on his face wandered close to the family and winked, then sprayed them all with a bucket of water.  The audience loved it.  Nick stood up but Victoria put a hand on his arm and he sat down again. The show went on, gathering laughs, gasps and applause from all that was there.

 

When they retired to their rooms that night, they still hadn’t seen Jarrod and couldn’t figure out where he had gone.  They said their goodnights and went into their rooms.

 

Nick and Heath pondered the circus and the mysterious clown who had winked at them.  They both wondered if it really was their oldest brother.  If it was, did he really lose his mind?  What was he thinking?  With these thoughts in mind, the brothers fell asleep, with thoughts of the circus still firmly planted  in their minds.

 

Victoria and Audra had similar thoughts about Jarrod.  He hadn’t shown up at the circus.  He had told them all to meet him at the circus.  BUT he wasn’t there.  Was he really that frowning clown with the bucket of water?  Victoria sighed as these thoughts played around her head.  My son, the one who was always predictable, always knew what he was up to.  Audra listened to her mother tossing and turning in her bed as thoughts of bewilderment ran through her pretty blonde hair.  Her big brother a clown?  How very cool, she thought.  They both fell asleep dreaming of the clown with the frowning face.

 

Jarrod met them at the restaurant for breakfast the next morning.  He was his himself and looked at his family expectantly.  “Where were you last night, Brother Jarrod?” asked Nick with a mouthful of food.

 

“I apologize family.  Something came up and the meeting went longer then was expected.”  They looked at him quizzically.  “Did you enjoy the circus?”  Audra couldn’t take anymore of the suspense.

 

“Jarrod, were you in the circus?”  she asked.  The family sat forward, all gaping at the man, waiting for an answer.

 

“Me?  Whatever do you mean Sister Dear?”  He finished his meal and pulled out a cigar. 

 

“Oh for Pete’s sake Jarrod!” Audra was getting exasperated. “WERE YOU OR WERE YOU NOT THE CLOWN THAT HAD THE FROWNING FACE?”

 

 Jarrod put on his best lawyer face.  “Why would you think that?”

 

Heath watched this exchange, and said quietly, “Because Brother Jarrod, you forgot to was the paint from behind your left ear.”  Jarrod’s mouth fell open as he lifted his hand to rub behind his ear.  He brought it down and held it up in front of his face.  He grinned when he saw the white paint on his fingers. 

 

“How observant little brother.” He said to Heath. Nick stood up.  Victoria did not know what to do but watched in anticipation at her middle son.

 

“Did you just fall off your horse?  Why were you in the circus and a clown no less?” he spat out at him.  “You knew it was your birthday! You knew you were expected to be with us so we could give you presents and cake!”

 

“Brother Nick!  That’s why I did this.  It was totally UNEXPECTED!  I wanted to do something I wanted to do, something so unexpected to show you that I can think for myself and not for everyone else all the time!  I always wanted to be a circus clown, so I figured, why not?  No time like now to live out a dream!  I did it, I am happy and I surprised you all.”

 

The family sat back and listened to him.  They had all taken him for granted, always expecting him to pull them out of their troubles.  They never thought that he had expectations of his own.  There he was, telling them this was his dream and he wanted to make it come true.  They were dumbfounded.  They had never really thought of Jarrod in this way, he had always been there for them, the least they could do was be there for him.

 

Victoria spoke up first, “Happy Birthday Son” and handed him his gift.  He smiled at her and unwrapped the gift because it was expected of him.  He was happy and he had the best birthday of all, his family and their understanding.  That was all that mattered, the frowning clown put back in the recesses of their minds. 

 

 

 

THE END