Victoria’s Lament
by Lindabrit
Being a
frontier woman isn’t easy you see,
one sign of
weakness and you’re history.
So to avoid
being caught in this weakling’s trap,
I developed my
awesome slap!
I can slap
hard enough to knock you out,
I soon taught
Miss Audra not to pout!
My research
showed, I did it best back-handed,
ask anyone on
whom my slaps have landed.
My children
treat me with all due respect,
their
deference to me they rarely neglect.
The ranch
hands too, are always polite,
one or two of
them have tasted my right!
Lady-like is
fine, it’s usually best,
but a good
hard slap will keep ‘em impressed,
by all means
be civil, civil is nice,
but a slap
like mine, well it makes ’em think twice.
I’m the head
of my house and I use it at home,
that slap
stops the Barkleys from wishing to roam,
well, all
except Gene, he’s been gone for a bit,
guess I hit
him too hard with that very last hit!
~