Through the Eyes … Changes

by Marci S.

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

Timeline: Spring -- Samantha is 13 years old.

Nick jumped off his horse and ran into the house.

“Mother! Heath! Where is everyone?” Lucky came running over to Nick. “Not you.” Nick gave him a light pat on the head, and then glanced up at his mother, who was walking down the staircase.

“Nick, what are you shouting about?” Victoria neared her son.

“Jarrod sent a telegram.” He held up a piece of paper. “You won’t believe what it says.”

“Don’t leave us in suspense,” Heath said as he exited the study.

Sam followed carrying a few books in her arms. “When’s he coming home?” Sam asked. “He promised to help me with this stupid school project I have.”

“I don’t think it’s stupid” Heath commented.

“That’s cause you’re going to marry my teacher,” Sam countered. “I still think it’s stupid.” Sam dropped the books on the table.

“Nick, what does it say?” Victoria wanted to change the subject.

“Jarrod will be home tomorrow and he’s bringing someone with.” Nick smiled slightly. “Seems my little brother is not the only one getting married.” He held the letter out and Victoria took it, reading it quickly.

“Her name is Kathleen,” Victoria announced, “and she’s someone Jarrod knew in college. Seems they reconnected in Sacramento.” Victoria glanced around at her silent children. “We better get a guest room ready,” Victoria said, and then studied her youngest daughter. “Samantha, I expect you to be on your best behavior when she gets here.”

“What does that mean?” Sam folded her arms across her chest.

“It means you don’t treat her like you did Laura in the beginning.” Heath lightly tapped his sister’s head.

She moved away and glared up at Heath. “You two talked about me on your first date. How’d you expect me to react? Boy did the kids tease me when they found out my brother was dating my teacher.” Sam sighed and then plopped down on the sofa. She jumped up just as quickly. “When is Audra coming home? She’s supposed to take me to get a stupid dress for that stupid dance.” Sam ran out of the room and Lucky followed.

“How long does this stage last?” Heath asked after hearing the front door slam.

Nick chuckled as he place a hand on Heath’s shoulder. “Let’s see. With Audra it started when she was thirteen and lasted about four years. Right mother?” He glanced over his shoulder.

“This one has a little too much attitude lately,” Victoria responded. “I’ll talk to her later. Right now I want to get a room ready for Kathleen.” She headed upstairs.

“What do you think?” Nick asked.

“About what?” Heath reached for an apple and took a bite.

“About Jarrod getting married. What do you think I’m talking about?”

Heath shrugged as he took another bite and chewed slowly. “ I think it’s great,” he finally answered. “Makes you the lone bachelor among us.”

“And I plan to stay that way.” Nick slumped in the chair. “It’s gonna be kind of lonely around here” he muttered, and then stood up suddenly. “I have to plan two stag parties now.”

“I don’t want one” Heath spit out.

“Yours is already planned and you’re going to like it.” Nick pointed a finger at his little brother. “What are we going to do for Jarrod?” Nick started pacing. He was still pacing when the front door opened and Jarrod walked in. “Jarrod!” Nick exclaimed. “You’re a day early.” Nick’s eyes settled on the woman next to his brother.

“Kathleen, I’d like you to meet my brothers. Nick and Heath.” Jarrod pointed to each.

“Jarrod has told me so much about you two.” She smiled at both of them.

“Mother.” Sam ran in, stopping suddenly when she saw Jarrod. “Jarrod, you’re home.” She ran up and hugged him, then stepped back shyly and stared at the lady with him.

“You must be Samantha.” Kathleen extended a hand and Sam tentatively shook it.

“What has Jarrod told you about me?”

“Samantha.” Heath’s voice held a warning tone.

“He said you’re a lovely young girl and he’s very proud of you.” Kathleen smiled at the child.

“Oh.” Sam seemed to relax a bit.

“Mother.” Jarrod noticed Victoria walking down the stairs. “Mother, I want you to meet Kathleen.” He quickly kissed her and then escorted his mother over to his fiancée.

The women exchanged pleasantries and then an awkward silence engulfed the room.

“We’re going to go freshen up.” Jarrod’s voice broke the silence. “At dinner, we’ll explain everything.”

“She seems nice,” Nick commented when they were out of hearing.

“I like her.” Sam agreed. “Where’s Audra?” Sam ran back outside to wait for her sister.

* * * * * * * *

Sam quietly walked down the stairs and neared the study. She could hear her brothers talking and stood there for a few minutes before walking in. Jarrod was the first to see her.

“Sam, what are you doing up?”

“What’s a stag party?” Sam walked in as she asked that.

“Sam, you didn’t answer my question. What are you doing up?” Jarrod repeated.

“I couldn’t sleep.” She sat on the floor in front of the desk. “Now answer mine,” she demanded.

“Sam, don’t use that tone with me.”

She glanced up at Jarrod. “Sorry,” she quietly said and then stood up. “Are you really getting married in a week?”

Jarrod nodded. “Yes, I am.”

“I’m going back to bed.” Sam sullenly walked out of the room.

“I think she’s having trouble with all the changes going on,” Nick explained. “I’m not sure I can blame her.” Nick stood up. “Jarrod are you sure you don’t want a party?”

“I want you two free next Friday and Saturday.”

“For what?” Heath asked as he stood up and poured another drink.

“We’re going camping.” Jarrod laughed at the look his brothers gave him. “That’s what I want. The three of us sleeping under the stars, talking…” Jarrod paused, shrugging his shoulders slightly. “It’s what I want,” he stated firmly.

“You want that over drinks and beautiful girls?” Nick rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” Nick started towards the door. “Goodnight all.”

“Here’s to finding the right woman.” Jarrod raised his glass. Heath did the same and then each took a drink, grateful for the women they had found.

* * * * * * * *

“Why can’t I go with?” Angrily Sam crossed her arms and glared at her brothers.

“Sam, you know why. I’ve explained it to you already.” Jarrod continued to pack supplies.

“But, you’ve taken me camping before. Why is this so special?”

“Sam,” Victoria interrupted, “have you forgotten that tonight’s the dance?”

“I don’t want to go to the dance. I’d rather go camping.” Sam moved out of the way so Nick could get by.

“Sam, you told Tommy you’d go with him and he’s very excited about it,” Nick said as he lifted up the last box.

“Fine. I hope it rains,” she muttered as she ran out of the room. Nick couldn’t help but chuckle.

“She’s getting good with her exit lines.” Nick commented. Victoria and Jarrod did not find that funny and neither laughed with him.

* * * * * * * *

Jarrod stretched out on the ground and stared upward. The sun was just going down and it was too early to see any stars, but it was quiet and Jarrod savored the few minutes of peace.

“This should last the two nights.” Nick groaned as he bent over and dropped the logs. “Is Heath not back yet? How long does it take to get water?”

As if on cue Heath showed up with a bucket of water.

“If you two start arguing again, I’m not responsible for what I do.” Jarrod sat up and glared at his brothers.

“This was your choice,” Nick spit out as he sat down next to Jarrod. “I still don’t understand why we’re doing this.”

“Neither do I.” Heath said as lowered himself to the hard ground.

“You don’t get it.” Jarrod stood up and started pacing. “I’m getting married in three days. Heath will be married in a month and we’ll never have this opportunity again.” Jarrod stopped pacing. “I just wanted to spend a couple of nights with my brothers before everything changes. But if that’s too hard to understand and if you two can’t stop arguing, we can forget about this and just go home.” He headed towards the horses.

“Whoa.” Nick jumped up and grabbed his brother. “Jarrod, you’re not going anywhere. I’ll be on my best behavior, I promise.” Nick guided his brother back to where Heath was still seated. “Right Heath?”

“Sure.” Heath was somewhat amused by Jarrod’s behavior but he kept that to himself. It seemed Sam wasn’t the only one upset by the upcoming changes. “Jarrod are you nervous about getting married?”

“Nervous.” Jarrod slowly said that word as he glanced down at Heath. Finally he sat down, sighing loudly. “I’m scared to death,” he finally admitted.

“Really?” Nick sat close to his older brother. “Jarrod, this happened so fast. Are you sure this is right?”

“It’s right,” Jarrod stated firmly. “I love Kathleen and I know I want to spend the rest of my life with her.” He smiled. “It just seems all so surreal. I wasn’t expecting it and it just happened and I’m so happy…” he paused and chuckled softly. “Heath you understand, don’t you?”

Heath shrugged. “I’ve been dating Laura for over two years now. I don’t think I could have made a decision so fast.”

“You and Laura spent the first month arguing over Sam.” Nick reminded him. “Remember how angry Sam was?”

“Laura was just concerned about her student,” Heath spit out. “How was I to know Sam would get so upset that I told Laura about her past?” Those were not happy memories for Heath; for weeks Sam would barely speak to him.

“Jarrod, what did you tell Kathleen about Sam?” Jarrod looked away, knowing that Heath was watching and waiting for an answer.

“She knows everything,” Jarrod finally said. “But because of the past I asked her not to let on until Sam was comfortable with her.” Jarrod smiled weakly. “It’s easier to deal with Sam if you understand what she’s been through.” Jarrod thought about the past few days and how unpleasant his little sister had been acting. “What is wrong with Sam? Has she been like this the whole time I was gone?” He glanced from Nick to Heath, waiting for an answer. “Even Mother seems to be losing patience with her,” Jarrod continued when neither brother spoke up.

“She’s just reacting to everything around her,” Heath stated as he stood up. “Think about it. She’s only had four stable years out of thirteen and now everything is changing. I’m getting married and moving out of the house; Jarrod is getting married, not to mention that she’s a teenager and everything that comes with that. I think she’ll be fine once things settle down.” Heath walked over to the wagon and pulled out a bottle of gin. “Anyone?” Both brothers nodded so Heath grabbed three glasses and sat back down.

“Heath you may be right but I’m not willing to wait until things settle.” Jarrod paused to take a drink. “We’re partially to blame because we’ve always been too easy with her but now I’m worried about how this is affecting mother and I think we need to step in and do something.”

“Jarrod, Sam is not that bad. Besides she’s a piece of cake compared to raising us.” Nick smiled when he said that.

“Speak for yourself,” Jarrod retorted. “Nick was a handful,” he added addressing Heath. “And father…” Jarrod smiled from the memories. “Nick do you remember the horses?”

As he said that Nick started coughing. “Those damn horses.” Nick rolled his eyes. “I don’t think Heath wants to hear about that.”

“Sure I do.” Heath was more than eager to change the subject and they rarely talked about their father.

“Father had just bought six Arabian stallions,” Jarrod began. “Beautiful animals and very expensive. They were also wild and father told us not to go near them. Nick of course didn’t listen…”

“I was eight years old,” Nick interrupted, “and I just wanted to touch one. So I went into the corral and before I knew what was happening they were all charging me.” Nick could still remember how scared he was at that moment. “I was able to move out of the way but the horses all ran free.”

“Father was so angry when he heard what happened.” Jarrod picked up the tale. “Nick was hiding but I knew where he was so after a few hours father sent me to get him.” Jarrod chuckled. “Nick asked me to run away with him but being the good brother I dragged him home.”

Heath laughed, trying to picture his brothers as children. “What happened next?” he eagerly asked.

“I had to face my father.” Nick stood up. “You’ve seen his pictures but they don’t show what an imposing figure he was.”

“And believe it or not Nick was small for his age,” Jarrod piped in.

“So I walked into the study and father was waiting. Pacing back and forth with his arms behind his back.” Nick demonstrated for his brothers. “And I waited and waited scared to death as he walked back and forth in front of me.” Nick stopped pacing and stared upward to the sky. “Finally he stopped and stared down at me. And I braced myself for the worse. In a voice barely above a whisper he says ‘Nicholas, I want you to go upstairs and think about how devastated your mother would be if those horses had trampled you to death’.” Nick shook his head and smiled slightly. “I started bawling like a baby. Don’t know why…maybe I was just relieved that the belt never came off. As I’m leaving the study father tells me to meet him downstairs at four in the morning.”

“What for?” Heath asked.

“He had me doing odd jobs around the ranch from sunup to sundown for a whole week and he was right beside me the whole time. Showed me how much hard work it took to run a ranch and taught me the value of money and time.” Nick smiled. “I think he was grooming me to take over even back then.”

“Because he knew I wasn’t interested,” Jarrod said defensively ignoring the look Nick shot him.

“Heath, what’s wrong?” Jarrod noticed he had an odd look on his face.

“Nothing.” Heath looked away.

“Heath, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you with my story.” Nick neared his brother.

“No! No, I’m fine.” Heath chuckled softly. “I wish I had grown up a Barkley but I’ve accepted it and I like hearing about our father.”

“I wish you had too,” Nick commented. “I could have used an ally against Jarrod.”

“Hey!” Jarrod protested. “Who says he would have been on your side?”

“I do.” Nick faced his older brother. “Can you imagine the trouble the two of us would have gotten into?”

Jarrod groaned. “Unfortunately I can.” Suddenly an idea came to Jarrod. “We can do something similar with Sam.”

“What?” Nick and Heath asked in unison.

“Think of a task that Sam wouldn’t like.” Jarrod could tell his brothers were still confused. “Sam needs to know there are consequences for her actions including her smart mouth. So every time she smarts off she’ll have to do this task for an hour. Something like that,” Jarrod added.

“Cleaning the stalls,” Nick stated wrinkling his nose in disgust.

“I guess it wouldn’t hurt,” Heath said, then grinned broadly. “Jarrod you’re just practicing for when you have children.”

“Oh gawd.” Nick groaned as he sat down. “I can just see it now. Little Barkleys everywhere … Uncle Nick this, Uncle Nick that … I am NOT babysitting and I do not change diapers. Got it?”

“Nick, you’re next,” Jarrod told him. “Just wait and see.”

“Not me.” Nick finished his drink and jumped up to get another. “I’m a confirmed bachelor and that’s the way I’m staying.” He grabbed his brother’s glasses and poured another round for all.

* * * * * * * *

Sam pulled away from Tommy and stared at the ground. He had kissed her suddenly and she wasn’t sure how to react or what to say. Sam wasn’t sure if she even liked it; she just wished Audra were there already to take her home.

“Sam, wanna do that again?”

“No.” She moved farther away.

“Why not? Didn’t you like it?”

“Uh! I don’t know. I guess it was ok.” Sam fumbled over her words. “Tommy we’re too young to be kissing.”

“No, we’re not. My parents got married when they were fifteen. Only two years older than us.”

That was the last thing Sam wanted to hear. “Don’t talk about marriage. We’re too young to be talking about that.”

“Ma was sixteen when I was born.”

“Stop it.” Sam pushed past Tommy and walked away. He followed closely, almost bumping into Sam when she suddenly stopped. “Tommy Kyle you are too young and so am I.”

“No I’m not,” Tommy protested.

“I know for a fact you sleep with a teddy bear…” Sam stopped when she saw the look on Tommy’s face. “Jacob told me,” she added matter-of-factly.

“That’s not true.” Tommy backed away. “It’s on my bed…but…but I don’t sleep with it. I don’t think I like you anymore.”

“So.” Sam shrugged her shoulders.

“I know Lisa likes me and she’s nicer than you are.” Tommy turned and ran in the direction of his house.

“I don’t care,” Sam whispered and then walked away, towards Audra who had just arrived.

* * * * * * * *

“Sam, you said what?” Victoria couldn’t believe what her daughter had just told her. “True or not, why would you say that to Tommy? You knew it would hurt his feelings.”

“He was talking about marriage and I didn’t want to hear it. What’s going on around here? First Heath, then Jarrod and now Tommy. Doesn’t he realize I’m too young to be talking about marriage?”

“Your actions speak loud and clear Samantha. If he didn’t know then I’m sure he knows now.”

Sam glared at her mother and then let out an exaggerated sigh. “Nobody understands me,” she cried out. “I’m going to talk to Lucky. At least he likes me.” She ran up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door.

* * * * * * * *

Jarrod stifled a yawn and glanced at the clock. They had returned that evening and he was tired but he knew Sam would be downstairs soon and he wanted to talk to her. Sam still had nightmares, especially when she was troubled, and Jarrod couldn’t remember the last time his sister was so out of sorts. He heard light footsteps and knew Sam was heading towards the kitchen. She usually went there to get a glass of milk and some cookies before going back to bed. When Jarrod was up he would meet his sister in the kitchen and keep her company. This time he stayed in the family room and called out to her.

“Sam, please come here.”

It took her a few minutes to shuffle over to him.

“Did you have a nightmare?”

She nodded yes.

“Sam, I want to talk to you. Please sit down next to me.”

He pointed to his right and Sam plopped down on the sofa, keeping her distance from her brother.

“I heard about what happened with Tommy and I’m very disappointed with you.”

The sofa moved as Sam fidgeted.

“You don’t seem to care who you hurt right now and it’s going to stop.”

Jarrod glanced sideways but Sam wouldn’t meet his gaze.

“Sam, every time you say something hurtful to anyone in this family, including Laura and Kathleen, you have to clean out the stalls for an hour. Understand?”

Sam remained silent.

“Sam, I’m hoping you’ll think twice before you speak. If not you’ll be spending a lot of time thinking in the stalls.”

Jarrod paused hoping Sam would say something.

“Sam, you used to tell me everything, what’s changed?”

Hearing that, Sam jumped off the sofa. “Everything’s changed.” She paced before Jarrod. “Heath is getting married and moving away…”

“Heath will be less than five minutes from here and you can see him every day,” Jarrod interrupted.

“I don’t see him now,” Sam countered, her voice rising with anger. “He spends all his time with Laura, you’re always out of town, Nick is never here and I don’t have a clue where Audra goes every night.” Sam took a breath. “Mama goes to bed early and no one will let me leave the house in the dark.” Her arms flailed with anger. “Jarrod, I’m sick of being alone every night. I’m so bored that I’ve read every book in this house and I don’t even like reading.”

That was a bit of an exaggeration but Jarrod let it go. Sam stopped moving and faced her brother.

“Jarrod, does growing up mean I’m going to be alone again?”

Momentarily Jarrod was at a loss for words. They all knew what Sam feared the most; being alone like she was when they found her. It was the one trait she shared closely with Heath and what the others always took for granted-the need for a family.

“Sam, sit down next to me.” He saw her eye the other end of the sofa. “No, here.” Jarrod wanted her close to him.

She sat and allowed Jarrod to put his arm around her.

“Sam, I’m sorry! I’ve been gone for too long and I didn’t know what was going on. I’m sure the others are just too caught up in their lives right now and they don’t realize what they’re doing.” He kissed the top of Sam’s head. “But we don’t know how you’re feeling if you don’t tell us. Acting up isn’t going to get you the kind of attention you want. Got it?”

“I guess.” Sam yawned and leaned against Jarrod.

“Sam, tomorrow I’m going to show Kathleen around the ranch and then take her into town. Would you like to go with us? We’ll wait until you get home from school.”

Sam glanced upward. “Will Kathleen be ok with that?”

“She’ll be fine with it. Kathleen really wants to get to know you.” Jarrod tightened his grip around his sister. “Why don’t you ask Tommy to come with us and we’ll take him home after dinner.”

“He’s not talking to me,” Sam glumly said.

Jarrod smiled slightly but turned his face so Sam wouldn’t notice. “I bet if you apologize again and ask real nicely he’ll go.”

“I’ll try,” Sam said as she stood up. “Jarrod I’m going back to bed.” She started to walk away, but stopped and approached her brother. “Thanks Jarrod.” She leaned over and hugged her brother, then scurried out of the room.

Jarrod sat there for a few minutes and then heard more footsteps. He looked up to see Kathleen standing in the doorway.

“I waited until I heard Sam’s door close. How’d it go?”

Jarrod smiled as he stood up and wrapped his arms around his fiancée. “I think it went fine.” He whispered into her ear, and then pulled away. “Kathleen, how many children did you say you wanted?” Jarrod placed his arm around her waist and they started towards the staircase.

“At least a dozen” she said and then chuckled softly.

“Maybe we should get started now,” Jarrod suggested as they climbed the first step together.

“Maybe,” Kathleen agreed as Jarrod guided her towards his room.

THE END