THE WEAKER VESSEL / Parts 41-60

by Mrs NickB

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

'The Weaker Vessel' was written in collaboration with 'The Voyage' by Abigail of Dreamers. In the interest of story flow, excerpts from 'The Voyage' (posted in blue) will be interspersed within 'The Weaker Vessel' and are used with the permission of the author.

Part 41

The Saturday following the Harvest Festival, Laura was in Stockton visiting her cousin. They were doing some shopping as they walked and hobbled, respectively, along the sidewalk chatting.

"Nick's birthday is coming up and I still don't know what to get him; I mean what do you get a man who has everything?"

"Maybe the answer should be nothing," Hope offered the logical solution.

"Now, I can't give him nothing." They stopped to look in store window.

"Maybe he needs a new fishing pole?"

"Heath is giving him that, Nick broke his last one."

"How did Nick break his fishing pole?"

"Over his knee, he got angry when Heath caught all the fish and Nick caught nothing but a cold," she giggled.

"He's got a wee bit of a temper hasn't he?"

"Well, he 's just a wee bit passionate, donchaya know," Laura teased with an Irish brogue.

"A new gun?"

"He's very particular about that, besides Jarrod is having one made for him."

"New boots?"

"Victoria."

"New spurs?"

"Audra," they both repeat in unison, laughing; then Hope offered, "I can think of a few things Nick could use but you can't buy them, patience, and a good pair of ears to listen with."

"Oh you're no help!"

"I know; you can give him yourself."

"I beg your pardon, I've already done that!"

"Oh Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" Hope said exasperated, "I don't mean that way! I mean give him your time."

"Time? What do you mean? He already has all my time."

"No, I mean set aside some time that you and he can do whatever he wants to do."

"Do I look stupid to you?! Good Lord, he'll have me out fishing or worse, hunting for deer or something awful like that! Maybe camping, Awww God, that would be awful!"

"How bad could that be?"

"You go camping with him then!"

"It's not my company he wants. Surely you could find something that you both enjoy doing together."

Laura giggled wickedly, "There is. How do you think I got these swollen feet?! Can we please sit down? My feet are killing me!"

"Lets have some tea at the Inn, your treat."

"My treat is it?"

"You're the one with the swollen feet. .....You know what you need? You need baby shoes."

"Baby shoes? And pray tell oh brilliant cousin of mine, what are these baby shoes? Surely you don't refer to the shoes a baby wears."

"That's what Ma called them when she was expecting. She had a pair she wore when her feet swelled and she called them baby shoes."

"Leave it to your mother to think of that!"

"When you have children as often as my mother you learn a trick or two."

"God forbid, all those children! I would die!"

"Oh not me, I want a dozen children."

"Twelve children! Are you out of your mind?! You'll be forever in a family way."

"No I won't. Anyway that's not going to happen."

"I wonder if Heath wants an even dozen children." Laura smiled coyly.

"Why would you even say such a thing? It's not like I am keeping exclusive company with Heath. We have just seen each other a time or two, that's all."

"Of course, you're not keeping exclusive company with Heath at all!"

"That's correct, I'm not."

"So who else are you keeping company with; Mister Jenkins, the telegraph operator, possibly Padre Sanchez?"

"Why don't we go buy you some baby shoes, before we go have our tea at the Inn?"

"As if I didn't notice you changing that subject."

"You did notice, but being the wonderful, dear sweet cousin you are, you'll let it pass."

"Oh I will?" Laura asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, you will." Hope said in a determined tone.

"Alright. Let's get those baby shoes."

The cousins headed across the street to the cobbler, when Hope noticed a politician on a soap box near the town square, standing in front of the statue of Tom Barkley, talking to a small crowd of people. She stopped in her tracks, causing Laura to almost trip over the smaller woman.

"Hey, I almost fell over you!"

"Sorry. Think your feet can hold up a little longer?"

"Why?"

Hope smiled up at the taller woman and nodded toward the politician, "Want to stir up a bit of trouble?"

Laura glanced over her shoulder, "As Nick always says, it's one of the things I do best! Let's go."

The two women walk over to the crowd listening to the politician. The tall politico was dressed in a checkered brown suit, with a dark brown matching vest, and grey bowler hat sat atop of his flaming red head. His ruddy complexion gave away to beads of sweat as he spoke deftly about all his past accomplishments in Congress.

"And should you re-elect me to congress I promise to represent you to the best of my ability! So don't forget to mark your ballot for Harwood Kenney! Your Congressmen!

"Will you see fit to represent me Congressman Kenney?" Hope shouts from the crowd.

"I most certainly will madam!"

"How can that be Sir, if I can not vote for you? You said that if we voted for you then you will represent us."

"Your husband can vote for me, and I am sure a lovely little lady as yourself could certainly persuade her good husband to vote for me!"

"Alas Congressman, I have no husband whom I could persuade to vote for you."

"Then your father can vote for me lovely miss. Now as I was saying..."

"I am sorry Congressmen Kenney, my father does not live here in the state of California, so he could not vote for you, and therefore you could not represent me as you promised, for I do live here and I do not have representation."

"Then you'll just have to get yourself a man dear little lady. I am sure there are many fine men here in Stockton who would gladly vie for your lovely attention." Several of the people in the crowd, laughed along.

"So what you are saying Sir, is you cannot represent this woman because she has no man to vote for her; then I say let her vote for herself then you can truly represent her, " adds Laura to the argument.

"Well.... ah.... Miss?"

"It's Mrs. Barkley," she corrects him.

"Ah Mrs. Barkley, of the Stockton Barkleys?"

"The same, and you still haven't answered my question Congressman."

"I can certainly represent you if you persuade your husband to vote for me," the politician kindly offered.

"I will gladly tell my husband to vote for you Sir, if you'll answer another question for me."

"Certainly I will answer your question if I can."

"It should be simple enough for you. My question is this; There has been an amendment suggested to the Constitution that if passed in enough states will become law, and I would like to know how you would vote."

"Amendment madam? Which one are you referring to, there are many proposed dear lady?"

"The amendment that will give women the right to vote!" A grumbling noise rises up from the crowd.

"That has not come up in the United States Congress madam."

"True enough, but perhaps as my representative you could introduce it on the floor of Congress."

The congressman swiftly pulled out a pocket watch, "I am pressed for time, I need to take the next train but I do thank you for your time and attention. I am sorry I can' t answer anymore questions, but I do hope you will consider me when you mark your ballot, thank you one and all." The politician hurried off his soap box and quickly disappeared into the train depot.

The cousins look at each other. "Set him to thinking didn't we?" asked Hope.

"Set him to fleeing, more like it." Laura giggled.

"Come on, lets go get your baby shoes."

Part 42

Later that same evening, after supper, Laura sat in the game room on a sofa with her legs up. Nick takes a seat beside her. He pulls her legs up onto his lap, takes her shoes off and gently rubs her feet.

"Oh thank you sweetheart, that feels so good. My feet have been killing me all day."

"These new shoes?" Nick points to the shoes he took off and left on the side of the sofa.

"Yes, I bought them today with Hope, she calls them baby shoes."

"Baby shoes? Don't look like baby shoes to me."

"They 're bigger than my other shoes. It was her mother's idea, she always got swollen feet when she was with child so she had special shoes that she called 'baby shoes'. Did you know that Hope helped her mother birth her last child?"

"Is there no end to Tidbit Dougherty's talents?" Nick said mockingly.

"Tidbit; I do think Hope prefers being called that, then what you use to call her."

"Okay, so I made a mistake!"

"And when Nick Barkley makes a mistake, it's a big one!" chimed in Jarrod as he walked into the game room.

"At least I admit it!"

Victoria entered the game room with a tea tray, "Looks like it's just the four of us this evening; your Aunt Polly went to bed early. She was exhausted after being with Audra today at the orphanage. Tea?"

"Yes please. Poor Aunt Polly, she's really not use to small children, they do seem to tire her out."

"Four of us? Where's Heath?" wonders Nick.

"Saturday night. He's taking Hope out for the evening. He's upstairs, dressing."

"Isn't that sweet? I told you they were perfect for each other," Laura said pleased.

"You've been playing matchmaker since the Harvest Festival."

"I'm not playing matchmaker, I'm just helping things along a bit, that's all," she smiled slyly.

"Yeah, like a stick of dynamite opening a tunnel. I think I hear him coming down the stairs."

"Now don't go teasing him Nicholas!" warns Victoria.

"Who? Me? Would I tease Heath?" Nick plasters on an evil grin.

"My guess is he'll try to sneak out without anyone of us seeing him," quips Jarrod.

"No he won't!" Nick jumps up from the sofa, bounds over to the doorway and yells out, "Hey

Heath, Get in here!"

"Please don't shout, poor Polly wants to rest," his mother admonished him. Heath walked into the game room wearing a dark brown jacket, white shirt, black pants, vest, and a shoestring tie.

"Whaddya barkin' about now?" complains Heath.

Nick runs his finger under Heath's jacket lapel, "Now, don't we look pretty."

Heath swats Nick's hand away, "Whaddya call me in here for?"

"Just wanted to see if your were dressed proper. Whaddya think Laura, is he dressed well enough to go acourtin' our little cousin?"

"I think Heath looks very handsome."

"Thank you. Can I go now?"

"Well now, just wait a minute here, being that Hope is part of my family now, I feel responsible for her, especially with her father not here to look after her and all. Just where are you planning to take our little gal? Not to some dirty old saloon?"

"No, that's your style of courtin'. And it's none of your business where I'm taking her."

"Nick, stop teasing Heath, come back and rub my feet."

"Yeah, go attend to your wife and leave me alone!" chided Heath, "I'm going, Good Night!" Heath angrily left the room.

Nick shouts after him, "You bring her back at a decent hour Boy!" from the foyer Heath shouts back, "AW SHUT UP!"

Nick laughs; his mother shakes her head, "Must you tease him Nick?"

"He'd do the same to me if he had the chance!"

"Come back here and rub my feet. Leave Heath alone. Honestly, you never learn!"

Nick sat beside his wife again, "Relax, I won't mess up your matchmaking plans."

"I'm not matchmaking!" she protested under a grin.

"Yeah, and I'm the Queen of Sheba!"

Part 43

Heath couldn't understand why he felt so nervous, it certainly wasn't like him, the big tough cowboy. It's not that he hadn't been out with women before; heck he had lots of women, but this little gal was different and he didn't know why, but he felt she was special, no not special, unique, yes that was the word Jarrod used to describe her. Heath heard Jarrod mention that word when he spoke of Hope one time, and though Heath knew what it meant he still looked it up in the reference book, just to see what else it meant:

'having no equal, extraordinary, rare, irreplaceable, matchless.'

'Yes,' he thought, she was all that and more. 'A little too good for the likes of him,' but she did say yes when he asked her for a date and that was something he really didn't expect. Certainly she was more Jarrod's type than his, a book learned person. Even went to college. Heath's only college was what life's lessons taught him. But somehow she wasn't interested in Jarrod. It was rare for Jarrod to bother with the women in Stockton, he seemed to prefer the more sophisticated type ladies, and Hope was certainly that; it should have been a perfect match but it wasn't. 'lucky for me' Heath thought with a half smile as he walked up to the boarding house door.

He hesitated before knocking, he wished he didn't have to go through the embarrassing gauntlet of Mrs. Murphy's Boarding House. He knocked on the door nonetheless, and made an audible sigh of relief when it was Hope Dougherty who opened the door for him. His smile widened.

"Good evening Heath." She opened the door wide in an invitation for him to enter.

"It sure is a good evening Hope." he said relieved.

Hope had anticipated that Heath may have felt uncomfortable with Mrs. Murphy greeting him at the door, so she made sure she was ready and waiting. Granted it wasn't the socially accepted way to act, after all a young lady should always make an entrance when receiving gentlemen callers, but Hope wasn't one to put pomp before people, thinking Heath didn't deserve to be put in an embarrassing situation.

"I shan't be a minute, I have my shawl right here."

"Let me help you with that." Heath quickly took up the black knit shawl that had been carefully laid on the hall table and draped it around the lady's shoulder.

"Thank you. I hope you don't mind going to this school fundraiser dance?"

"Now why would I mind, I'll be with the prettiest girl there." Heath's smile gave cause for Hope to blush deeply.

"It may be a bit stuffy, talking with the school board committee members."

"Well you let me know when it gets too stuffy for ya and I'll take ya on the dance floor, how's that?"

"I may ask the second we get there, " she said grinning.

"Then the second we get there, we'll start dancing." He gave her a friendly wink and smile to match.

Heath helped a pleased Hope into the Barkley carriage.

B

With the exception of Victoria Barkley, all the members of the Stockton School Board were there. The Simmons, the Rosses, and Mr. Walsh, the head of financial part of the committee. Several of the committee members nodded their approval as Hope walked in on the arm of a Barkley suitor.

"Dear Miss Dougherty how wonderful to see you again. We are all so pleased that you could come to our little fundraiser."

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world, Mrs. Simmons."

"And how is Mrs. Barkley this evening Heath? I'm so sorry she couldn't attend."

"Why Mother is fine thank you ma'am, she woulda been here but she just didn't feel right leaving our house guest."

"House guest? Oh yes, Miss Thomas, dear Laura's aunt. I understand she's a retired school teacher from back East."

"Yes she is," confirmed Hope.

Heath sensing the conversation had already turned deadly boring, he took a gentle hold of Hope's arm. "You know that's some mighty fine music you have playing there, sure would hate to waste it. Excuse us Mrs. Simmons." Heath gave her a cursory nod and hastily escorted his lady onto the dance floor.

Hope smiled up at the handsome cowboy as he guided her away. "Thank you, for your very, very chivalrous gesture."

"Saved me as well, starting to feel my eyelids getting heavy there for a second. I tend to nod off easily when someone's jaw is flapping, usually it's Nick's."

Hope gave a slight giggle. "I know you enjoy teasing him, but it's obvious to anyone that Nick is very special to you."

"Nick's the best brother anyone could have, and I use to say he's one of a kind, but no more; with Laura by his side, they're two of a kind."

"Ah yes, I agree. They are quite a pair."

The couple floated over the dance floor, enjoying the moment. There were no need for words as the music transformed them into a joyous world of their own making. Hope was elated to discover that whatever nervousness she had before had disappeared. Being in Heath's arms seemed like the most natural experience in the world, 'comfortable, almost...' she thought.

************

"Well, den, who e'er yeh're cousin is marryin' I'm shahr is a pahrfict fit," commented Maggie Dougherty.

"Aye, the poor bloke!"

"Da! Now yeh stop that. Laura's a fine match, any man would be lucky to have her!" Hope said defiantly.

"Well, if we don't even know the boyo's name, little Laura must. At least I hope so!" Her father said with a laugh as he read over his niece's letter again.

"Well uh cahrse she do, Mick; she's just excited, the dear girl."

"Do you think Ma that I'll ever have a perfect fit like cousin Laura?"

"Ah, me Hope, me dearie, yeh have plently of tyime fer dat. Besides, it's like I always say: dere's a cover fer every pot."

***************

"Hope...Hope..?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, forgive me Heath."

"Looks like you were miles away."

"Three thousand to be precise. I'm afraid you caught me thinking about my family in Boston."

"You missed them don't you?"

"Oh yes I do, but I wouldn't have missed this trip for the world."

"What made you come out here all alone?"

"Adventure, someplace new and different I suspect. When Laura visited one summer she filled my head with all sorts of wonders of the West and I just had to see for myself."

"Well then, I'm mighty glad you did."

"So am I."

"And I'm gonna haveta thank your cousin for putting that bee in your bonnet."

Her face flushed a deep crimson. Heath sensed that she might be parched, "Sure could use some of that nice cool punch. How about you?"

"Yes, please."

He walked her over to a row of tables and chairs, and once she was comfortably situated, he quickly withdrew to the refreshments. Upon returning he brought drinks and a snack.

"Look what I found, these little apple crisp things. Seems to be mighty popular, they're going like hot cakes on a hungry man's plate." Hope couldn't avoid the giggle that escaped her lips.

"What's so funny?"

You, and the things you say, You're very funny, you have a dry wit."

"Humm, really? Nick's always telling me I'm not funny at all."

"Well, he's wrong."

"Yup, that's what I figured, but it's good to have someone to back me up."

They sat quietly listening to the music and enjoying the food, giving each other an occasional approving glance. When Mr. Clayton Walsh casted his shadow on the happy couple.

"Good evening Miss Dougherty, Heath." They gave him a cordial greeting back in the form of nods. "A fine evening, wouldn't you say?" Mr. Walsh stood over them with his fingers tucked in his vest pockets, and rocking back on his heels. Not waiting for an answer to his question he continued, "We are all looking forward to the success of this fundraiser to have enough money to pay for those History books you had us buy."

"I'm sure we will have enough money, but if not, we shall have the satisfaction that the new books are being put to the good use by the children." Hope assured the gentleman.

"Yes of course; however, I can't help but wonder if the good people of Stockton have any money to spare with all the fundraisers going on in town of late."

"In my short time here Mr. Walsh I have found the good people of Stockton to be very generous indeed, especially when it comes to the future citizens of this town, our beloved children."

"Well yes of course, still with the orphan home fundraisers, the school and now the Stockton Public Library I just wonder if we are asking too much of our townsfolk."

"They are all worthy causes Mr. Walsh, and all the charities you mentioned all serve the children of the community."

"You don't have something against kids ... do you, Mr Walsh?" Heath asked innocently as he stood up, drink still in his hand.

"No, of course not. I like children. I wouldn't be on the school board if I didn't like and care for children."

"Well, now that's good to hear 'cause children are the future of this country and we certainly don't want to have a bunch of ignorant people running it, now do we?" Heath nodded thoughtfully.

"We certainly don't."

"I'm glad you agree with us, because in that case I am sure you will join my brothers and me in donating a check to the school." Heath reached into his breast pocket and pulled out three checks. "I have checks here from my brothers Nick and Jarrod, they wanted me to pass this along to the school committee; and that along with mine makes for a sizable donation. We knew you'd want the opportunity to match it, Mr Walsh."

Heath handed the man the three checks. Mr. Walsh's eyes became large when he saw the amount of each check. "You, ah.. want me to match that?"

"I know a man who cares so much about the children of Stockton would want to take advantage of this occasion to match our contribution."

"Ahh, yes, of course, I ah..."

"I believe Mrs. Ross is in charge of the blank checks, right over there." Mr. Walsh followed Heath's pointing finger toward the back of the room.

"Oh .. ah .. yes I see .."

"Why don't you go on yonder there." Heath gave a gleeful half grin as he watched Mr. Walsh reluctantly walk toward Mrs. Ross. Heath held out his hand to Hope. "Come on, let's get out of here before he comes back."

"Gladly." She took his hand and followed him outside. Heath gave a small laugh as they made their escape.

"Now that's better, fresh air. How about a walk?"

"Love too."

"You know, I think you might like a walk to our river. It's not exactly Boston Harbor but it still looks pretty at night. Would you like to go there?"

"I would enjoy it very much."

"That's what I want to hear, come on." He wraps his arm around her shoulder to protect her from the cold. "Are you warm enough? It's a little nippy."

"I'm use to good cold clean air."

"Aah, I thought as much, put my jacket over your shoulder."

"Now I don't need that, I'm fine."

"Don't be stubborn now, if you get too cold I'll just have to bring ya back in and you'll have to contend with the boring old school committee people."

"Well, since you put it that way, I'll happily take the offer of your jacket."

"Thought you might." He wrapped his dark brown jacket around her shoulder, then took her small, delicate hand in his to lead her onward. Noticing how tiny her hand was, he brought up his other hand to stroke her fingers. "You have such tiny little fingers," he chuckled, "almost like a little girl." Hope blushed.

"Runs in the family, all the Dougherty women are small in stature."

"I bet they are all mighty tall when it comes to being very pretty."

She looked away, blushing as she said an almost inaudible thank you.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Get all embarrassed when someone gives you a compliment?"

"I do not."

"Yes you do."

"I don't."

"Afraid I beg to differ with ya."

"I., I, I don't."

Heath stopped walking, forcing her to do the same as she was still holding his hand. She glanced up at him then averted her eyes. Heath cupped his hand under her chin, bringing her face up to meet his. "Miss Hope Dougherty you are without a doubt the most uncommonly prettiest girl in this valley, and don't you tell yourself different or you'll have to answer to Heath Barkley, and he can be an ornery cuss when he gets riled, and trust me, you don't want to get him riled."

Hope couldn't help laughing out loud. "I thank you kind Sir."

"Now that's better."

They walk to the Stockton docks. Once there, they sit on several boxes on the pier watching the boats bobble and weave in the water.

"What do you think about our little harbor?"

"It's little."

"But uncommonly pretty, like you." She turned her head, staring out into the water. "Even in the moonlight I can see you blushing."

"I'm not blushing."

"Now I wouldn't bet on that if I were you."

"Alright, I will admit to a little." She gave him a luminous smile and he held tight his urge to kiss her.

"Hope?"

"Yes Heath?"

"Aw, it's nothing."

She let his jacket fall off her shoulders and pulled a lacy handkerchief from her skirt pocket. She daintily blotted her forehead with it. "Weather got warm rather quickly, I guess I'm not use to the ever changing weather in California."

"Thought New England was known for it's fast changing weather."

"It is, but not this fast. That was quite, well, fast." She gave a deep audible sigh and angled her head toward the docked boats, once again avoiding his glance. Heath smiled down at her, his blue eyes twinkled knowingly. Then he stretched out his legs, and loosely folded his arms. They didn't speak, but enjoyed each other's company looking out toward the same scene.

"Twelve children huh?" Heath finally interrupted the silence between them.

"Ah...What? Twelve children? Who told you about twelve children?!" She couldn't hide the startled sound in her voice. The thought that her own cousin would speak about their previous conversation about children to Heath appalled her.

"I thought you said you had twelve children in your family, isn't that right?"

"Oh, oh yes, I mean no, we have ten, ...ten children. We would have had eleven but one died at birth."

"Oh, sorry. Still that's a powerful lot of children for two parents." He said still looking out toward the water.

"My parents managed all right."

"I suppose they did, leastways they didn't have much of a choice."

Do you like children Heath?"

"Oh I like 'em just fine. We'll be having one running around soon I suspect."

"We?"

"Yes, Nick and Laura's little one, I mean."

"Oh yes of course. Theirs." She tried in vain to hide the disappointment in her voice. "Do you, I mean, would you like to have children someday?"

"Oh sure, someday I expect I will. It would be nice. How about you?"

"I would love to have children, someday."

"I bet you would like lots of children." Heath looked down at her with a smile, his arms still folded across his chest.

"Wouldn't you? I mean, if you could, ah, I mean... Well, how many children would you like to have?"

"Well, I would have to consider the lady in question, after all, it's she who would be bearing the children and all. She would have the final say in the matter I would suspect."

"What if she, I mean, your wife didn't want children?"

"Hmm, now that's a good question, but all in all I can't see myself marrying a woman who didn't want any children, lessen of course she just couldn't, but that's a different matter entirely, don't you think?"

"I suppose it is."

"Of course I've worked with a family once that had twelve kids, I even helped to take care of some of them when I had to. Twelve little ones can get mighty hungry real fast. Feeding them cuts down on all the noise they make." Heath chuckled at the memory.

"You helped take care of them?"

"Sure, I didn't mind, kinda cute they were. Running around all over the place. It made for a joyful home. I really liked that job, didn't pay much but it was a real happy family, kinda enjoyed being among them for a time. Always thought it would be nice to belong to a large family like that."

"It is." Hope smiled at her own memory, rubbing her arms against the night chill that suddenly came up off the water.

"You're cold again. Come on, let's put my jacket back on you." He wraps the coat over her shoulder.

"Thank you Heath."

Heath pulls out his pocket watch from his pants pocket. "It's getting on to eleven o'clock. I think it's best I be getting you home. Full day of work tomorrow."

"Yes, for me too." He held out his hand, and Hope readily took it, as he led her back to the boarding house. They walked leisurely toward the center of town.

"Mother wanted me to ask if you would like share Thanksgiving Dinner with us."

"How very sweet of her to ask, please tell your mother I accept her kind invitation. Is there anything I can bring?"

"Just yourself is all."

They reached the front door of the boarding house.

"Thank you for escorting me to the dance, I had a wonderful time."

"The pleasure has been all mind. I enjoyed your company."

"And I yours. Oh, before I forget, here's your jacket; thank you for the loan of it."

"You're welcome."

"Well, good night Heath." She opens the front door.

"Good night Hope, sleep well." Heath takes a few steps backwards, and studies the boardwalk under his feet. "Hope?"

"Yes Heath?"

"Do you mind if I called on you again sometime?"

"I think I would like that Heath."

"Really? Well, that's a, that would be right fine. Maybe ah, well, I'll be calling on you, sometime, maybe I could escort you to church Sunday?"

"I go to the Padre Sanchez' Mission Church."

"Oh that's fine. I don't mind going there, it's a fine church and Padre Sanchez is a fine preacher."

"Yes he is." She smiled warmly at him, "Well, good night Heath, and thank you again."

"Thank you Hope, it's been a pleasure."

"Good night again."

"Good night." She gave him another warm smile as she quietly closed the door. Heath smiled as he walked off the porch whistling a tune. Realizing he didn't have a way to get home, because he had left the Barkley carriage back at the dance hall. He gave a chuckle at his absentmindedness then walked happily toward the hall.

Part 44

That same evening back at the ranch, Nick carried his wife upstairs so she wouldn't have to put on her shoes. He set her down on the sofa near the fireplace.

"Why don't I stoke the fire; are you cold?"

"That would be nice, it's a cold night tonight. I wonder where Heath's taking Hope?"

"If he's smart he'll take her to a nice quiet hill overlooking the valley and do a little sparking in the moonlight; if he's smart. Just like this," Nick puts his arms around her and kisses her cheek.

"It's so romantic to see new love starting out."

"Oh I don't know, there's a lot to be said for old married love being very romantic too." After Nick puts more logs on the fire, he sits beside her, they cuddle, watching the fire.

"Nick?" she kisses him on his cheek.

"Yeah?"

"Do you know what next Tuesday is?"

"It's not some anniversary or a birthday I should remember is it?" he said cautiously.

"No, not for us. But it is a special day." She cuddles closer to him, fitting her head under his arm.

"And just what special day is it?"

"Election day." Nick looks down at her making a face, "You wanna tell me why that's special?"

"It's your right as an American to make your voice heard at the ballot box."

"I have no trouble making my voice heard anywhere." Laura chuckles at his comment.

"It's important for you to make sure you elect officials who will truly represent us in Congress. You can't just vote for anybody."

"What's the difference? They are all the same."

"That's not true, sweetheart. Some are not very good at their jobs and you have to vote them out."

"I don't know one politician from another. I don't pay attention to these things. I got a ranch to run."

"Then how can you justify voting for someone if you don't know what they stand for?"

"Well, men talk in the saloons and on the streets and we talk about politics some times and when the time comes to vote, and that's how I vote."

"But you should know how these men vote in Congress; they are representing you."

"I don't have time for that, I got a...."

" ....a ranch to run, yes I know. Look, I want to show you something," she stood up from the sofa and walked over to the writing desk, pulling out an old newspaper, "Now this paper talks about how our congressmen voted these past two years on certain issues. For example, did you know that this Congressman voted against giving the Civil War veterans free burial plots in their respective towns. Now your a veteran, doesn't that make you angry?"

"Yeah, now that I know. So I won't vote for him, how's that?"

"Fine, now you see how important it is to see how they vote on issues?"

"I really find politics boring to talk about, especially with my lovely wife when we have so many other things to talk about, like our baby."

"That's a good idea, lets talk about our baby. Don't you want our daughter to grow up in a country that treats her as a human being and not as a possession?"

"A daughter huh? You're sure about that?"

"Positive." She returns to her seat beside him.

"Fine, but she's still going to be called Nick Jr."

"Nick, be serious."

"No, I don't want any kid of ours to be treated like a possession."

"Well then, you can do something about it."

"What? Or should I ask?"

"You can vote the right people in."

"And just who are these right people?"

"People who will seriously consider giving women the right to vote." Nick jumped up from the sofa and began to get ready for bed, ignoring her as he unbuttoned his shirt.

"Nick?....Nick?.....NICK?!"

"Laura I told you before I do not want to talk about this women suffrage with you! We went all through that misery in Sacramento and I don't want it causing problems for us here!"

"Why not?"

"You know why not! You ended up in a filthy jail! I almost ended up getting arrested. Our entire honeymoon was ruined! Not to mention I went broke and had to wire for money just to get us both out of trouble! Jarrod still nags me about what happened then! We're home, we're happy, we're going to have a baby, can't you let this go?!"

"Nick, there was this politician in the square today in Stockton, and Hope and I asked him about...."

"Oh don't tell me Hope is one of them too?! Please don't tell me that! I was just beginning to like her!"

"Nick, please listen to reason..."

"Go ahead, talk all you want but I'm going to bed!" He finished putting on his pajamas, "Good night!"

Laura sighs, as she watches Nick gets under the bed covers. "Help me take my dress off before you go to sleep."

Nick sat up in bed, "Come over here." He unbuttoned her dress while she stood by the bed, "I love you Laura, more than life itself but I do NOT want to talk about this with you, not EVER!" he quickly pulls the covers up over his head, signally his final word on the matter.

Laura pulled the dress over her head, "Then you will be content to let our daughter be treated like cattle for the rest of her life!"

Nick pokes his head out from under the covers, "You know, if you have a boy like I want, we would not be having this conversation, girls are nothing but problems; ya don't have problems with boys! Just ask my mother! She has had more problems with Audra then she has ever had with three boys! A smart woman has all sons!" With that, he pulled the covers over his head again.

Laura shakes her head at him, "You have got to be the most exasperating man on God's green earth!" Nick peeks his head up from the bed covers again, AND DAMN PROUD OF IT TOO!"

"Oh Bother!" Laura slips on her nightgown and robe, then kneels on the floor near her vanity table to pull out the bottom drawer which reveals a red cloth box with a red ribbon around it. She takes the box over to the sofa near the fireplace and pulls out some papers until she finds a small pamphlet she saved from Sacramento; a pamphlet written be Elizabeth Cady Stanton about women's rights. Laura looks over towards Nick to make sure he's sleeping , then she takes out her glasses from her robe pocket, and tucks her feet under her while she sits back and reads; she looks up from her book, thinking out loud to herself, "Hmmm, Elizabeth Cady Barkley. Susan B. Anthony Barkley," she chuckles to herself, "it'll kill him. Nicolette Barkley? Nickalina Barkley? argh, Laura Hope Barkley, Meredith Barkley."

The sound of a baritone voice rose up from under the bedsheets, "NICK BARKLEY JUNIOR! Now come to bed!"

Part 45

Monday, mid morning, Laura visits her brother-in-law in his Stockton office. She enters, Jarrod's secretary Mildred Landers greets her.

"Good morning Mrs. Barkley."

"Laura please Mildred."

"Very well, Laura. He's waiting for you, please go right in." she waves her in.

"Thank you." She opens the door, poking her head in, "Jarrod?"

He stands from his desk with a wide smile and walks over to greet her, his hands outstretched. "Welcome Laura, come right in. How are you feeling?" he gives her a peck on the cheek.

"Quite well thank you. Is the woman here?"

"Not yet, I wanted to talk to you first. Please sit down," he leads her to a seat near his desk.

"Do you think she is the right one Jarrod?"

"Well, she comes with wonderful credentials, but you are ultimately the deciding factor. If you are not happy with her then I will send her back to Sacramento."

"She's from Sacramento?"

"Yes, she worked as a head librarian there. Here is her resume." He hands her a file. There is a knock on the door, Mildred peeks her head in, "Excuse me, she just arrived, shall I send her in now?"

Jarrod nods to Laura, "Want to read that first before you meet her?"

"No, I think I rather meet her, I'll read it later at my leisure," she suggested that to avoid using her glasses in front of him.

'Very well, send the lady in Mildred."

A slender grey haired woman entered, wearing glasses, dressed in a grey business suit, she looked to be in her early fifties. Laura stood when she entered. The two women stared at each other. The older woman grinned knowingly, "Mrs. Barkley, we meet again."

"So formal Mrs. Hamon, I thought we got past that some time ago."

"Yes, I suppose we have Laura."

"You two know each other?" Jarrod asked surprised.

"Yes, we met briefly in Sacramento."

"Well then, this should be familiar territory for you both."

"Jarrod, do you mind if Mrs. Hamon and I have this interview in private."

"Well, no if that's what you want dear."

"Yes, please."

"Why don't I see if I can't get us a table for lunch at the Inn. I'll meet you there,... say, a half hour?"

"Yes Jarrod, that would be wonderful. A half hour it is." Jarrod takes his hat from the hat tree and leaves the ladies alone in his office. Laura leaned against Jarrod's desk, her hands resting on the rim.

"You first," Laura challenged, once she was assured that Jarrod was out of ear shot.

"What do you want to know?" The older woman folds her arms, shifting her weight from one foot to the other, taking a mental note that she was not invited to sit down.

"You already know that. Why don't you just answer," she glared at the woman.

"Came here to make a fresh start."

"Why Stockton?"

"I read the advertisement and I am experienced."

"You didn't work as a librarian in Sacramento. I remember you told me you worked in a hospital, cleaning bedpans wasn't it," Laura said sarcastically.

"I was a librarian before I got arrested for demonstrating, then I took whatever job I could. A job in the hospital was pretty much all I could get. They weren't too particular who cleaned their bedpans."

"How are my old cell mates? Maddie, Sylvia and Ro ...." she added scornfully.

"Still working hard for the cause," the older woman quickly thwarted her in mid sentence.

"And you?"

"I'm getting too old, I just want a place to lay my weary head at night, the fight is all out of me."

"You gave up the suffrage movement?" she inquired, surprised.

"It was always my intention to let the younger ones take over the fight, but surely you knew that, don't you remember?"

"Trust me, I didn't forget anything that happened and neither did my husband. If he ever saw your face he would ... well, I don't know what he would do. He just wants to forget everything that happened in Sacramento."

"I suppose I don't blame him."

"No, neither do I. Still, if you intend to come here to Stockton and try it, well, it's different here. You can't ram it down people's throats. That won't work."

"I told you I have no intention of getting involved in it."

"What brought out this change in you?"

"My sons. A few months ago, my son came into the hospital looking for me," trickling tears ran down her cheeks, "he had been looking for me; he wanted me to come to his wedding. Can you imagine, I was a guest at my own son's wedding. I wasn't the mother of the groom, just a guest, but...it just made me realize how much I had missed. My son David, accepted me into his home, my other son, the youngest, Jess, he took a little longer, but he eventually accepted me as well."

"And your husband? How did he feel about it?"

"He wasn't happy about it of course, but my sons are men now, and he didn't have the influence over them that he once had, so I got my children back, at least in a small way and I'm grateful for that."

"So why aren't you back there with them in Sacramento?"

My sons are lawyers now, they both moved to San Francisco, opened up a firm there. Stockton is closer to 'Frisco, and this job came up, and I knew you were involved with it since I saw the name Jarrod Barkley in the advertisement. I was surprised though when he said I was going to be interviewed by his sister-in-law, I had hoped he meant you."

"I'm his only sister-in-law. So you thought I would take pity on you."

"Yes, I had hoped you would."

"And what makes you think I would?"

"Because you did once before, when you got that lawyer friend of yours to help us, Jason some body."

"Jason Browne." She corrected.

"Yes, he helped us a great deal, it was a turning point for me. My name was in the paper after that and my son saw it, that's how he got in touch with me. So you see you helped me get my sons back."

"I 'm happy for you. That time I spend with you ladies was a turning point for me as well, but it almost ruined my marriage before it had a chance to begin. Involving me in your little war may have done more damage to your cause."

"So the suffrage movement has not touched Stockton?"

"Not quite, but there has been little rumblings, as I said, Stockton is not a place to go beating a drum for the cause, someone may just take a shot at you. It pays to be quietly tenacious."

"Is that what you're doing Laura?"

"In Stockton the Barkleys set the tune, and if you want to change the tune you have to do it Barkley style."

"So you're in the movement?"

"As quietly as possible, and there are others, but if you dare breathe a word about what happened in Sacramento, then it will explode in everyone's face especially mine."

"I told you I am out of it, no more for me. You want to change the tune here, you can do it with my blessing but not my help."

"Good. Consider yourself hired then, I will show you the library after lunch. Come to lunch with me, I don't want to keep Jarrod waiting."

"Just like that? You're hiring me?!"

"Just like that." Laura walks towards the office door, her hand on the door knob.

"Why?"

"Because when I was in that jail in Sacramento you were the only one who showed me any compassion. I was terrified, and the only words of comfort I got there were yours. I pay my debts, so now we're even. Come on, Jarrod hates to be kept waiting. My brother-in-law is going to buy us lunch."

Laura opens the door for the woman, who returns her smile.

"You're a good woman Laura."

"So are you Dora; I think we'll work well together."

Part 46

Later Laura arrived home after having lunch with Jarrod & Dora Hamon in town. As Laura wearily ascends the stairs rubbing her back, her Aunt Polly stops her.

"Laura I need to talk to you." her hand on the banister.

"Not now Aunt Polly I'm really tired I'm going to take a nap before dinner, excuse me."

"No, I will not excuse you! Not this time!" she speaks in her best authoritative teacher tone, slapping her hand on the wood surface of the stair railing.

Laura descends the stairs, staring at her aunt, " Just what is this all about?"

"You have been avoiding me since I arrived here. And I am not unaware that you have been encouraging Audra, your mother-in-law, and everyone else to keep me occupied."

"But isn't that what you want? Don't you enjoy all the things you've been doing here?"

"I've been wanting to spend time with you but you seem to be busy doing other things."

"I'm sorry you feel that way Aunt Polly. But I have been busy. I 'm only just now getting involved with the renovations for the Stockton library and today I ..."

"We need to talk Laura." She interrupted.

"About what?"

"This baby you're having."

"What about it Aunt Polly?" she said wearily, wishing she could avoid the whole conversation.

"If your mother were alive she would be talking to you about having this child baptized."

"If my mother were alive she would be... never mind, I really don't want to talk about this with you," she continued up the stairs again.

"Laura you can't let this poor child go unbaptized! It's sinful!"

Laura glowered at the older woman, "I don't need you to tell me what I should or shouldn't do with this baby! Do you understand? This child is mine and Nick's and you haven't any say in how it's raised." She rushed up the stairs to her room slamming the door behind her. Her aunt called out but she was summarily ignored by her angry niece.

B

Some hours later Laura hears Nick coming into the house, and rushes downstairs to greet him.

In the foyer:

"Hey where is everybody?! I'm HOME!" he throws his hat on the table, and smiles as he watches his wife rush down the stairs to greet him.

"Nick! I missed you!" she rushes into his waiting arms and greets him with a kiss.

"And where were you when I came home for lunch today?" he says in a chiding tone as he gives her another wet kiss on her cheek.

"You know very well I was in Stockton this afternoon. I had lunch with Jarrod."

"So my brother's wining and dining you in town, while I come home to an empty house huh?" he holds her tightly in a bear hug.

"I am here now and you have my undivided attention," she smiles at his teasing. Aunt Polly walks towards them from the parlor.

"Nick I would like to speak to you."

"What about Pollygirl?"

"Not now Aunt Polly, let Nick get cleaned up first he's been working all day."

"It's alright I got a few minutes," he turns his attention to the older woman still keeping one arm around his wife's waist.

"You got more time than that, I got the tub first!" Heath rushes up the stairs two at a time.

"HEATH!!" Nick yells, but Heath just chuckles as he continues up the stairs.

Jarrod walks into the house. "Laura dear I need to talk to you about today. I still have something I need to go over with you in private."

"Can't it...." she protests.

"You go ahead, talk to Jarrod, I'll talk with Polly and then when we are both finished I'll meet you upstairs, maybe by that time Heath will be out of my tub!"

"Alright, but you shouldn't go tiring Nick out Aunt Polly, he needs to relax, and not be bothered

by trivial ...."

"Laura please, it is important." Jarrod urges, his hand outstretched to her.

"Very well Jarrod, excuse me," Laura gives her Aunt a warning look, that goes unnoticed by the men in the room.. She takes Jarrod's offered hand as she walks with him into the office.

Her brother-in-law motions her to sit down in one of the leather chairs. "I'm sorry I didn't get to talk to you about this before; actually I had hoped to discuss it with you at lunch but you surprised me when you brought that woman with you, so I had to table the discussion."

"I'm sorry Jarrod... I didn't realize...."

"Oh honey it's not your fault you didn't know. I should have told you ahead of time." He pulls some papers out of his briefcase.

"Well, I 'm at you service now," she closes her eyes and rubs her head.

"Not another headache, I'm sorry, maybe we shouldn't ..."

"No, it's fine, this is just a small headache, I call it my Aunt Polly headache," she grins at him.

"Is the woman bothering you again?"

"When doesn't she? Oh, that's not fair, I shouldn't have said that, she really is well meaning."

"Save us all from well meaning family members," he smiles sympathetically, as he settles behind his desk in his chair.

"Well, no matter, maybe Nick can deal with it, he seems to get along with her better than I ever could. Now what is it that you need to talk about?"

"Speaking of well meaning family members, I'm afraid you're looking at another one I'm sorry to say."

"Oh Jarrod, you could never be a burden to me, you know how dear you are to me."

"We'll see after this. Do you remember sometime back you and I spoke about your father."

"Oh this isn't about my father's house is it? Did you finally find someone who wants to rent or buy it?"

"No dear, it doesn't have anything to do with your father's house, it has to do with his grave. I'm afraid I need your signature on a legal document giving the authorities permission to open up his grave."

"Open up his grave! Why on earth...!"

"No, no, it's not what you think, I need permission to open up his grave because I have the exhumation papers from Tucson completed. You remember you signed those some time ago, unfortunately I was remiss in that I should've had you sign the papers for your father as well. We can't re bury your mother's remains until we get permission to open up his grave. Honey, I'm sorry for all this unpleasantness..."

"Oh Good Lord Jarrod, please don't feel that way, it's what I wanted; to have them buried together. It will be wonderful to have them both reunited again, at least in death, and to have my mother's remains here would be...." She stands from the chair, turning away so he won't see her tears; but he moves from his desk, and quickly places his hands on her shoulders, he turns her, bringing her towards his chest as she collapses in his comforting arms, "I'm sorry..."

"Shushh, I understand this isn't easy for you, I just want to make it as painless as possible for you. I should have thought to have you sign this sometime ago; it's all my fault, sometimes I'm not at my best form as a lawyer, I'm prone to making small mistakes on occasion; of course I will deny it if you dare to tell anyone I said that," he attempts to make her smile with his self effacing humor.

She looks up at him smiling, " Your secret is safe with me." Jarrod smiles as he gives her a squeezing hug, "I knew I could depend on you, come on give me your signature on that paper and we will be done with it, I promise," he walks her over to the desk.

She leans over the desk, taking the pen, "When will it happen?"

"Sometime before Christmas, I am sorry it's at such a festive time but that is the way it turned out once I got pass the red tape."

"No please don't, it will be good. Aunt Polly will still be here." She signs her name to the document.

"Sign here as well, and initial on this next page." She follows his directions.

"Is that it?"

"Perfect, thank you. I will let you know when it will happen, I'll be traveling to Tucson to seal the deal as it were."

"You're not going to miss Thanksgiving are you?"

"Of course not, I wouldn't think of missing your first thanksgiving with us."

"Good, because I would feel very guilty to have taken you away from the family over this."

"Don't you worry your pretty little head about it. Come on I'll walk you out."

He leads her to the library door, his hand at the back of her waist.

B

Upstairs she enters the bedroom to find Nick sitting on the bed taking off his boots. He looks up at her, "So what did Jarrod want with ya?"

"Sign some papers to open up my father's grave."

"What the hell do you want to do that for?!"

"Jarrod has arranged to have my mother reburied here in Stockton, he's going to Tucson in a few days to arrange it." She takes Nick's vest from the bed and folds in, placing it in a drawer.

"Oh, I forgot about that."

"So had I." She sits on the bed beside him; he sits up, his hands on his knees as he looks at her.

"You okay with it?"

"Yes, of course why wouldn't I be?"

"Don't know, Polly said you were a bit short with her today; just wanted to know what's wrong."

"Nothing would be wrong if she'd minded her own business!" She stood again her arms folded in front of her walking away from the bed.

Nick moves over to her, putting his hands on her shoulders, "Come on, she doesn't mean any harm, she's just thinking about the baby."

"Damn her! She told you about it, didn't she?!"

"What harm is it? Why not get the baby baptized? She's right you know, your mother would have wanted it."

She pulls angrily away from his grasp, "How would she know what my mother would want!? She knew nothing of her! Nothing!"

"Don't you think your mother would have...."

"NO!" she interrupts him, "And I don't want to discuss it any further!"

"FINE! I'm gonna take a bath!" He heads over to the doorway.

"Nick, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bite your head off, I 'm just tired."

"I'm tired too, Laura." He leaves the room slamming the door behind him. Laura takes a deep breath, as she feels a twinge in her back again. She pushes her shoes off and lays on the bed.

B

*******************************

A woman's hand points to a group of prostitutes, "Is that what you want for your daughter? To be used and abused by men, like they are?!"

"Of course not!"

"How is an unmarried woman expected to make a living?"

"she doesn't have to do that if she doesn't want to!"

"I bet you went to one of those all girl finishing schools, huh? They taught you all the latest dances, and how to speak French, serve tea, and play piano well enough to entertain your husband's business associates! But most of all, they taught you how to catch a rich husband, isn't that right, Princess?! That's what we want! We want women to be educated in the finest schools! And be able to be what they want to be! Not some rich man's paid whore!"

"Is that what you all think of me?"

"Isn't that what you are? ...isn't that what you are? ...a rich man's paid whore?"

"I'M NOT! ...I'M NOT! ...I'M NOT!"

************************************

"Laura wake up, you're dreaming. Come on Honey, you're dreaming, wake up!" Nick tries to

shake her awake.

"I'm not a whore, I'm not..." she repeats dreaming.

"Whore? What the hell are you dreaming about?!" Nick shakes her harder, " WAKE UP!"

"Nick? What's wrong?" she stares up at him.

"I wanna ask ya the same thing, you were talking in your sleep again."

"Oh, I'm sorry. What time is it?" She holds her groggy head in her hands as she sits up.

"Time for supper. Just what is going on with you? Why are you dreaming these things? What's the matter?"

"Nothing, I'm fine, really. It was just a dream. I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you."

She swings her legs on the side and pushes her feet in her shoes.

"My goodness my feet are still swollen even after a nap. I have elephant feet!"

Nick smiles as he gives a kiss on her head, "Think of them as baby feet instead."

"You can be so sweet sometimes; I don't deserve you."

"I keep telling you that! What do you mean sometimes?!" She stands up from the bed and gives him a hug.

"I love you."

"Awww, blasted women!" He laughs, kissing her, then pats her backside, "Come on, lets go eat."

Part 47

Because of the following day being an election day, the usual banter at the dinner table has taken on a political tone.

"Can you imagine Sam Gruber on the Town Council? I tell you he doesn't stand a chance."

Jarrod waved his hand in resolve.

"Well, I would certainly hope no one in this family would vote for such a man." adds Victoria.

"No chance of that happening Mother." Heath volunteers.

"Yes, that's a fact." Nick chimes in.

"I think Emmett Bucket would be a fine choice. What do you think?" Jarrod asked.

"Emmett's a fine fellow, but I do believe that I favor Oscar Treadway over him." Heath replies.

"Really, why him?"

" 'Cause I know him better then I know Bucket."

"What do you think Mother?"

"I think either gentlemen would make a good councilmen."

"Yes, I would agree." Jarrod replies. Laura surveyed the table waiting for a lull in the conversation and when it presented itself....

"Well, that certainly takes care of the local decisions but have any of you given any thought to the state elections?" Laura asked with a gleam in her eye.

"Argh....here it comes..," Nick said under his breath, rolling his eyes.

"I beg your pardon? What do you mean dear?" asked Jarrod with an amused smile, and a slight condescending tone in his voice.

"Have you thought about who you want to represent you in the state as well as Congress?"

"Well, of course I have."

"Good. Who?"

"Who?"

"Yes Jarrod, dear. ...Who or rather whom?" she echoed his condescending tone.

"Well, a man's vote is a secret ballot, I really can't say."

"You don't know who you're voting for do you?" She challenged her brother-in-law.

"I most certainly do!" Jarrod said indignantly.

"Then who?"

"As I say, it's a secret ballot." He insisted.

'Would you past the potatoes please Heath?" Nick interrupts, grabbing the platter from Heath as he tries his best to ignore the conversation.

"But Jarrod, how can you keep it a secret ballot from your family?"

"I beg your pardon?" he leans his arms on the table, his head bobbing over his plate, with his blue eyes directed tightly on his sister-in-law, "Exactly what do you mean Laura dear?"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Jarrod dear; but isn't your vote representing the family?"

"The family?" he queries.

"Yes, the women in the family."

"Oh yes, of course I see what you mean." He smiled sweetly at her seemingly innocent question, "Well dear, you are right to say that, but the family knows that I will vote in a fashion that they would approve of and certainly I can still have a secret ballot."

"I don't understand how that can be Jarrod, if you don't know if they would approve of your choice or not. Have you ever asked them?"

"Asked them?"

"Yes, Your mother and sister, They are the two your vote will represent am I not correct?"

"Pass the bread Polly, please if you don't mind. Would you like some carrots?" Nick interrupted again.

"No thank you Nick."

"How about you Mother?"

"I have some thank you. Do answer Laura's question Jarrod." Victoria's interest turning toward the conversation between the two.

"The question? Oh yes, I ... ah... well, we haven't really discuss it much except on a few occasions."

"Wouldn't it be prudent of you to discuss it now, since the election is tomorrow. Surely you will want to truly represent the 'womenfolk.' "

Jarrod started to laugh at the her using the antiquated word, "You're teasing now Laura, you little minx, " he wags a finger at her, "you're just trying to stir up trouble."

" Heath, pass the..." Nick interrupted again.

"What do you want now Nick?!" Laura said exasperated.

"Nothing, ... not a thing." Nick shied away from any further confrontation. Heath hid a grin at the exchange between husband and wife.

"I am trying to get an answer. Since your vote represents your mother and Audra I think they have a right to know. I know who Nick is voting for."

"Leave me out of this," Nick grumbled under his breath.

"Who are you voting for Nick?"

"Huh?" He stared at Jarrod with a stupid look on his face.

"Who...are...you...vo...ting....for?" Jarrod spoke deliberately, not bothering to cover up his annoyance over the entire conversation.

"Ahhh....pass the meat."

"No one is passing you another thing until you answer my question!" Jarrod scowled at him.

"I'm voting for who ever she wants me to vote for!" Nick jerks a thumb in his wife's direction.

"Now pass the blasted meat!"

The others in the family hide their amusement as they watch the scene.

"You're joking?!" Jarrod said bewildered.

"What's wrong with that?!"

"Hah! You're henpecked!"

"I AM NOT!"

"He is NOT henpecked!! Tell him Nick!" Laura said indignantly.

"You know you're not helping here woman!" Nick scowled.

"What Nick means Jarrod is that we have discussed the issues and we both decided which of the candidates deserve our one vote."

"Issues? You've discussed political issues with Nick?" Jarrod said with a slight chuckle under his breath.

"Now, what's that suppose to mean?!" Nick grumbled, "You think I can't make an intelligent choice?!"

"Not at all brother Nick, it's just that you've never been much for talking about politics. And Laura dear, you surprise me. I had no idea you were interested in such things."

"And why not, Jarrod dear?" she says with a slight hint of ice in her voice, that didn't go unnoticed by the others in the room. Victoria watched the entire scene with amusement.

Heath stood from his chair. "Well if ya all excuse me I got some things to do in the barn."

"Like what?!" Nick asked loudly.

"Oh I'm sure I'll find something to do there."

"I think you'll need help with that. Excuse me too." Nick threw his napkin down after a swift wipe of his mouth and followed Heath out.

In the foyer:

Heath and Nick put on their jackets. Heath looked up from buttoning his.

"Ya know what's goin' on in there?"

"Yeah, and it's best if we steer clear. Big brother doesn't know it yet, but he's about to get ambushed, Laura Barkley style. Trust me it's not gonna be pretty. I've been on the receiving end of that."

"Hear that, let's get out of the line of fire." Heath opened the door for Nick.

As they walk to the barn:

"This have anything to do with the suffrage movement?" asked Heath.

"How did ya know about that?"

"Hope mentioned that she had a lively exchange between her and Jarrod once; almost done him in." Nick laughed out loud.

"Those two women are dangerous apart, together they'll do us all in. We gotta keep them away from each other."

"Don't see that as a possibility, seeing as she'll be comin' around here more often."

"How's that? You and her getting friendly?"

"Well, it's not that exactly, she and your wife are kin."

"True." Nick agrees as he opens the barn door for his brother.

"Whatsamatta, don't ya want me as yer cousin?" Heath laughs as he enters the barn.

Part 48

At the dinner table, Jarrod is amused to be outnumbered by women. His elbows still resting on the table and his attention directed to his sister-in-law, an almost smug look on his face as he questions her further on the topic of conversation.

"You mention political issues Laura, exactly what issues are you referring to?"

"The Chinese situation."

"The Chinese situation?" his eyebrows raised at her, "and just what do you know about the Chinese situation?"

"Some California representatives are planning on putting together a bill called the Asian Exclusion Act that will effectively curtail the immigration of more Chinese into California. Some of it's opponents say that it may also be used as a deportation tool to drive the Chinese back home to what is abject poverty, slavery, and possibly even death."

"That's only been a rumor started by the railroad conglomerate who's only desire is..."

"Cheap labor, yes, I understand that, and in these times of recession many are fearful of losing their jobs."

"Recession? What do you know about the recession?" he clucked.

"A recession is when there is not enough work for people, therefore not enough money to spend which causes the economy to backslide there by causing a recession which makes the employer gravitate toward cheap labor, that of course being the Chinese."

"And where did you hear about all this?" Jarrod's fingers lace together in front of a stern facial expression.

"I didn't hear about it Jarrod, I read it."

"In the Eagle?"

"Goodness no, that rag of Sam Gruber's; I read the San Francisco Clarion and the Sacramento Chronicle."

"Ahh, I see."

Audra smiles at her mother and Laura gives her an encouraging nod to speak her part.

"So you see Jarrod, with you voting for mother and I we would certainly like to know what are your thoughts on this issue." Audra watched a sly smile crossed Laura's face.

"Yes," Victoria adds, "Also Jarrod are you aware of this business about purifying the ballot box? Some of our representatives, want to take away the vote from the working man simply because they don't own property. Now, this whole idea started out because some of the Chinese are becoming citizens of the United States, but they are still not allowed to own property. Unfortunately should this law pass then even our own men working on this ranch will lose their voting rights, as most of them only own a horse and saddle and not much else."

"Why do I get the feeling I'm being targeted?"

"Goodness Jarrod, why would you ever feel that way? We are just discussing political issues." his mother smiled at him, Audra and Laura followed suit. Jarrod looked at the three of them, then his eyes wandered over to Aunt Polly who pretended that her only interest was the food on her plate.

"And do you have an opinion Miss Polly?"

"I most certainly do, but I'm afraid no one here is interested in hearing it." She looked sharply at her niece who scowled at her from across the table. "This is your home Victoria and I am only a guest here." Polly continued.

"No please Polly, I would be very happy to hear your opinion. No one is stifled from voicing their own opinions here."

"Well, I don't wish to insult anyone here at this table but, I feel this conversation is getting dangerously close to talking about the Suffrage Movement that has reared it's ugly head once again in this good country of ours. Which I find terribly vulgar to even consider."

"VULGAR?!" Laura cried out angrily. Victoria placed a calming hand on her daughter-in-law's arm.

"Please Polly, go on." All eyes focus on the old maid aunt.

"Back home there was quite a bit of talk about it. In New York there were women actually in the streets demonstrating, carrying placards, and shouting vulgar things. They were all summarily arrested of course."

Laura bristled at her aunt's homily then took a deep cleansing breath before she spoke, "Vulgar? You call these women vulgar?"

"I most certainly do Niece, I would hope you would agree with me. Women have no business in politics, it's a dirty business. A lady wouldn't be involved in such a thing."

"Do you know what I find vulgar Aunt Polly? I find it vulgar that a man is allowed to divorce his wife, turn her out in the street with only the clothes on her back and take her children away from her in the bargain. That is what I find vulgar!"

"I am sure that doesn't happen, not without good reason."

"And what good reason could there be Aunt Polly?"

"Maybe the wife was unfaithful to her husband."

"Or maybe the husband was unfaithful to his wife and found someone new, there by turning her out!"

"I never heard such a thing!" Polly shook off the horrid thought.

"I have. It happened to someone I know."

"To whom?" Jarrod joined the conversation again.

"You met her, Dora Hamon."

"Yes, you said you met her previously, in Sacramento I believe?"

"That's correct."

"Perchance is Mrs. Hamon a suffragette?" Jarrod's blue eyes narrowed at his sister-in-law, warily.

"The correct word is suffrager, Jarrod."

"I see. May I speak to you privately Laura, in the library." Jarrod threw his napkin down on the table.

"We can speak here Jarrod, I am sure your mother wouldn't mind."

"Well, this matter concerns a bank draft for five hundred dollars. Do you remember that?"

"Would you excuse us please." Laura dropped her napkin by the side of her dish and walked out of the dining room with Jarrod closely behind.

B

In the library Jarrod is very careful to close the door tightly behind them. Laura stood in the middle of the room, her arms folded, waiting for him to speak first. The lawyer stood before her, his hands on his hips.

"Shall I tell you my little scenario and you feel free to jump in to correct me when it needs clarification. Somehow, in Sacramento you got involved with this Dora Hamon, and her suffragette, excuse me, suffrage movement. Possibly getting arrested in the process, hence Nick wires home for five hundred dollars in bail money."

"It wasn't all for bail money, some of it was for fines."

"Fines?"

"Yes, Nick incurred some fines." She bit her bottom lip giving out a long sigh.

"And how did Nick incur these fines?"

"Riding a horse too fast within city limits."

"I see. And why was he doing that?"

"He was trying to catch up to the paddy wagon after I had been arrested."

"Why were you arrested? Or should I ask?"

"It was a mistake, I was not part of the movement, I was swept up in it."

"Swept up?"

"Correct."

Jarrod rubbed his forehead with his fingertips while walking over to the fireplace, his back towards her.

"Jarrod?"

"Damnit Laura! you got involved in that didn't you?!" Jarrod exploded as he turned to face her again.

"Not willingly."

"What do you mean then when you say swept up?"

"When Nick and I arrived in Sacramento we met these women in the lobby of the hotel."

"Suffragers."

"We didn't know it at the time. They befriended us, well actually me more than Nick."

"I'm not surprised."

"Well, to make a long story short, I witnessed several of them being arrested for demonstrating outside a church and I went to help them and I got arrested along with them."

"And Nick had to bail you out. But why didn't Nick have any money? I know he had plenty when you both left on your honeymoon and there was some waiting for him at the bank there."

"The evening before we had gone to a private gambling club and well, you know Nick."

"Yes, I know Nick, he gambled until all the money was gone."

"Well, he did leave with about fifty dollars. He wasn't totally broke."

"I applaud Nick's restraint." he said bitterly.

"Oh Jarrod, for heaven's sakes. It wasn't really anyone's fault it just happened. But my over night stay in jail taught me a lot of things."

"IN JAIL?! You stayed in jail over night?! What in the world was Nick thinking?! Letting you stay in jail over night! My God! Why wasn't I called?! That was an emergency! You should have called me immediately! Don't you realize what could have happened to you! My God I shutter to think! Damn it Laura!"

Jarrod paces the room back and forth one hand rubbing his forehead, and the other on his hip. Laura watched, surprised at his reaction.

"Good Lord Jarrod.... if I knew you were going to get this upset... You know Nick was just as upset. He did all he could to get me out of there. He wanted to call you but I wouldn't let him."

"WHY THE HELL NOT?!"

Laura jumps at his surprisingly loud voice, " I..I.. am.... s..s.. sorry Jarrod.. I...ah... I'm sorry."

Shoulders slumped when Jarrod realized how he frightened her. "Oh Laura dear, I'm sorry; I didn't mean to frighten you, I apologize." He gave her a quick hug, then he led her to a chair to sit down. "Please forgive me. I was just concerned for your safety."

"There was really no need...What I mean is... That happened some time ago and it's best forgotten."

"Of course, I agree. Please, do you mind if I have a drink?"

"Of course not, go right ahead."

"As I had mentioned, I did meet Dora Hamon there." He poured himself a drink, then stood by the fireplace. Laura waited for him to speak.

Heaving a deep audible sigh Jarrod encouraged her, "Go on."

"She told me of her plight, her husband divorced her and kept the children from her. It was only recently that she had come in contact with her children again."

"Well now, that explains the strange conversation I had with Nick some time ago about .... Never mind."

"Conversation?"

"Sorry; lawyer-client privilege."

"Nick talked to you about divorcing me!???" She quickly stood up, Jarrod moved to calm her with a pat on the shoulder easing her back into the chair.

"No! NO! Of course not! Relax, it's not like that at all. I assure you. Goodness Laura why in the world would he do that? You're going to have his child."

"Our child." She corrected him.

"Yes, of course I understand. My you have certainly changed Nick in some ways."

"I haven't changed Nick, just educated him, as I hope to do the same for you." She smiled sweetly.

"Educate me?" He gave her an amused grin and shook his head, "Ah Laura you are a rare woman indeed."

"And it is a wise man indeed who listens to a woman's voice of reason."

"Very well, you have me at a disadvantage, so do you worse, I'm listening. If you can convince a hard headed man like my brother, then I can certainly be open to your discussion. You know I had a similar conversation with your cousin Hope not all that long ago."

"Yes I know, she told me."

"So you decided to try your hand?"

"One good turn deserves another don't you think?"

Jarrod smiles, sits and listens.

Part 49

The first Tuesday of November, Election Day. After breakfast Nick and Heath were in the barn getting the two seated surrey ready for the ride into town. The two men dust off the seats of the surrey.

"And that's it, that's all you did?"

"Well, what could I do, it's not like we were alone and all."

"Heath, you got a lot to learn about women!"

"From you?! I don't think so." He rubbed the leather on the seat harder, hiding his frustration with the conversation. He loathe the idea of talking about his feelings for Hope with anyone, but most especially with Nick.

"Oh yeah, well who's married here you or me?!"

"Hell, that don't prove nothin' except maybe Laura's poor choice in men!" Heath gave Nick a teasing lopsided grin.

"Aw shut up!" Nick threw the rag at Heath who caught it in his hand.

B

Inside the house, Laura wrapped a shawl around her shoulders then opened the front door.

"Laura where are you going?" Audra asked while walking down the staircase.

"Just going out for a short walk to stretch my legs."

"Aren't you feeling well?"

"I'm fine, just a little twinge in my back; made it feel stiff, I must have slept wrong."

"You haven't slept very well lately have you?"

"The afternoon naps help. Want to walk with me?"

"No thanks, I need to get something for mother, she's waiting. See you later."

Laura nodded then headed out the door. She immediately heard Nick and Heath quarreling loudly. She watched as the two of them pulled the surrey out of the barn to be hitched.

Nick continued his grumbling, "And that's it, you're still at the hand holding stage with the girl?! At that rate you'll be a very old man before she lets you kiss her!"

"What do you want?! Hope's a shy girl. She's got to be treated with kid gloves!"

"SHY?! HOPE SHY?! HAH! That's the last thing that little gal is or haven't you noticed?! She has no problem with that mouth of hers when she's got an opinion! Hell, ya can't stop her!"

"Well, that's with you!"

"Oh really?! Well, she's put Jarrod in his place a time or two as I recall!"

"And you both deserved it too!" Heath pushes one of the horses in place, while Nick gets the other.

"All right, you took Hope to church Sunday; what happened then?"

"Nothing happened, I took her to church."

"That's it, nothing happened? You didn't even attempt to give her a kiss?"

"How could I? I was escorting Laura's Aunt Polly to church too. Remember when she heard I was taking Hope she asked to come along."

"You coulda said no. Polly woulda been fine going with Ciego. He's been escorting her to the mission church all the time she's been here."

"Well, she asked me to escort her and I didn't feel right saying no."

"So you haven't even given her a peck on the cheek yet, have ya?!"

"Who Polly?"

"Don't be a smart mouth! You know who I'm talking about!"

"A gentleman doesn't kiss a lady on the first date," Heath stated authoritatively.

"Well that's just stupid! Who made up that rule?!"

Laura joined the men, "Heath's right you know. A gentleman doesn't kiss a lady on the first date."

"I kissed you!" Nick waved his hand in his wife's direction.

"Yes you did, and do you remember what happened?"

Nick thought about it, then rubbed his cheek, "Oh yeah, I forgot about that."

Heath chuckled at Nick, "What did I tell ya?!" Heath moved over to Laura and placed his arm around her shoulder. "... and I seem to recall another time when this pretty lady gave you the benefit of her right cross." Heath gave a small laugh, and his sister-in-law joined him. Nick made an incoherent grumbling noise under his breath, then continued at his task of hitching up the horses.

"Ya gotta treat a lady like a lady Nick. Hope's a keeper, just like this lady of yours." Heath gives Laura a short peck on the cheek.

Nick's fists flew to his hips. "That's right; she's mine, so you keep your hands off her! Just because ya can't go kissing your girl, it don't give ya no right to kiss mine! Come on Honey, it's cold out here, you need something warmer than that if ya gonna go into town. Let's go inside. Finish hitching the horses Boy." Nick took his wife inside the house. Heath shook his head, a crooked grin lining his mouth.

B

The entire Barkley clan show up in double seated surrey for Election day in Stockton. Jarrod and his mother at the helm and Audra and Laura in back; escorted by Heath and Nick on either side on horseback. Jarrod parked the surrey in front of the saloon. The men help the ladies out of their seats.

"It seems strange that they would hold an election in a saloon of all places," complained Audra.

"That will change once women win the vote," Laura whispered.

"Think we'll ever see that day Laura?"

"Maybe not, but this baby will, you'll see."

Nick offers his arm to his wife, "Ready to go vote Mrs. Barkley?"

"Very ready Mr. Barkley." She squeezes him arm and gives him a kiss on the cheek. Victoria smiles as she takes Jarrod's arm.

"This is going to be interesting."

"Indeed it will, " Jarrod shook his head with a glint in his eye.

Heath took Audra's hand. "I've never been in a saloon before."

"Well, that's some small comfort I 'spect." Heath pushed his hat back with a smile.

Audra slapped his arm, "Oh you!"

The Barkleys let Nick and Laura take the lead into the saloon. The couple walk arm in arm to the registrar table.

"Hello Nick."

"Mr. Walsh."

"Good morning Mrs. Barkley, I'm surprised to see you here."

"Good morning Mr. Walsh, I can't imagined why you would be surprised, it is election day after all."

"Don't I sign somethin'?" Nick said impatiently.

"Yes, give us your John Hancock right here Nick."

Nick took the pencil and signed his name to the voting register. Another man handed him his ballot.

"You can go vote over there, " says the registrar. Nick takes the paper and walks over to the bar set up for marking ballots. Laura follows him still holding onto his arm.

"Excuse me, Missus. You can't do that."

"I beg your pardon?" Laura said sweetly to the registrar.

"It's a secret ballot ma'am, you can't go with your husband."

"Whadya mean she can't go with me?!"

"But Mr. B..B..Barkley Sir, she's not allowed to vote." Nick puts his hand on his hips, "Now who said she was votin', I 'm doing the votin' here! One man's family equals one vote ain't that right?!"

"Yes..s..s..s Sir, that's the law."

"Well this is MY FAMILY HERE," Nick makes a circular motion between himself and his wife,

"and between the three of us we got one vote! Now ya got something to say about it I suggest you take it up with the President of the United States!"

Yes.s..s. Sir."

Nick moves over to the bar, licks the edge of the pencil with his tongue. He reads the ballot out loud, "So whatcha think of this jackass right here Honey?"

"That one's better Sweetheart."

"That one it is Love. Now about this joker over here?"

"I would approve of him at least he's the lesser of the two evils."

"Yeah, I would agree with that." Nick marks his ballot.

All eyes are on the couple as they cast their one vote. The other Barkleys watch in amusement.

"That wife of Nick's is something else, isn't she?" Victoria said admiringly.

"She's got my vote." Jarrod smiled appreciatively.

Part 50

While the family made last minute preparations for the Thanksgiving Feast at the Barkley home, Heath made sure he was right on time to pick up Hope Dougherty at Mrs. Murphy's Boarding House. Hope hands Heath a covered basket.

"Would you take this please Heath?"

"What's this? You were told not to bring anything but yourself." Heath smiled as he placed the basket behind the carriage seat.

"It's not proper to go to such a feast empty handed."

"Is that another one of your Ma's sayings?"

"It tis sir." She gave Heath a generous smile at his teasing. Heath took her hand and helped her up onto the carriage.

"Boy howdy, it's a wonder your Ma had any time to raise all those younguns' with all the thought she had to put into those sayings of hers." Heath said with a lopsided grin.

Hope sat up in the carriage and looked down at him. "As Ma always said, 'a man works from sun to sun, but a woman's work is never done!' Then there's another she always says which is, All work is woman's work if you want it done right.'

Heath walked around the carriage and climbed in, "Well, I'm mighty glad to hear ya say that. Here, take the reins, now lets get going woman."

"I was hoping you would let me drive," Hope said as she happily took the reins. Heath leaned back, placed his feet on the rim of the carriage, covered his eyes with his hat and folded his arms, "Just watch out for the ruts in the road, we had lots of heavy rains. I like to have a smooth ride while I nap." He said with a hint of a grin.

"Yes sir. Gitty yup Pueblo!"

B

Victoria Barkley looked on with great satisfaction at the table set before her. The gold rim china with the blue tea roses gleamed in the sunshine still filtering in through the large windows. The prized silver service was polished to a high sheen. 'perfect' she thought. The holidays were upon them, and Victoria had her cherished family around her with the future holding more wealth of family love with the promise of her first grandchild. Nothing could have made the matriarch of the Barkley family beam more with pride, all was right in her world...

"MOTHER!"

"Nicholas, must you shout the minute you come into the house?!"

Nick entered the dining room. "What time would you like me to start shouting Mother?" He kissed the top of her head.

"You are incorrigible!" She clucked.

"I agree," Laura walked in from the kitchen carrying a vase of flowers.

"Here now! You shouldn't be carrying that, it's too heavy. Let me." Nick quickly took the flowers from his wife, and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek. "Where do you want them?"

"The center of the side board would be perfect," answered his mother. She moved over to her daughter-in-law and cupped her face in her slender hand. "You my dear need to rest, you look tired. Go on upstairs Silas and I can look after things."

"I'm tired enough that I won't even argue with you this time. I will be down when Hope arrives."

Nick's troubled eyes followed his wife out of the room. "Mother, do you need me to do anything for you?"

"No thank you dear." Victoria caught sight of his look of concern, "Why don't you go upstairs with Laura. See that she rests."

"I will." Nick followed the same path as his wife.

B

Pueblo switched his tail back and a tiny bit of horse hair went up the driver's nose. Hope began to sneeze.

" *ACHOO!* Ohh, my. Excuse me! Goodness!"

"Bless you, " came a voice under the Stetson.

"Thank you." Hope transferred one of the reins to her other hand and attempted to pull out a handkerchief from her pocket. The left front wheel found a deep rut in the road and caused the carriage to lurch forward. The reins flew from her hand. "Heath!"

Heath immediately bolted upright, "What happened?!"

"The reins! I lost the reins!"

Heath lunged for the reins but they became caught under the horse's hooves, as the wheel found another rut in the road, lurching the horse sideways to a faster trot. "Hold on!" Heath warned as he stood and leapt onto Pueblo's back. Wrapping his arms around the horse's neck he could only grab hold of one of the fallen reins.

"Heath! Be careful!" Shouted Hope.

"WHOA THEIR BOY! HOLD STILL!" Heath leaned as far sideways as he dared without falling. His long, slender finger catching the other rein. He sat up on the horse and pulled him to a stop. "Whoa there, that's a good boy!"

"Heath! Are you all right?!"

"Yeah, you?"

Hope placed her hand over her heart, "I think I stunted myself out of ten years growth!"

'That's too bad, you can least afford that." Hope couldn't help but let out a loud laugh and Heath joined her, as he climbed back into the carriage, with the reins still in his hands. "You know my Mama had a saying."

"Ya don't say. And what's this saying of hers?" Hope gave him a glowing smile that he found almost too irresistible, so he affixed his gaze on the horse.

"Sneezing and driving don't mix."

"Your Mama was a wise woman." Heath slapped the reins on the horse's back.

"Don't trust my driving anymore?"

"Sure I trust your driving, but that nose of yours has me a might worried, pretty as it is; can't tell when it's gonna go off." Heath chuckled teasingly.

B

The couple arrive at the Barkley homestead. Heath helps Hope down from the carriage.

"Thank you Heath."

"Hope, before we go in, I'd like to ask you something."

"Of course Heath, what is it?"

"Would you do me the honor of allowing me to keep company with you?"

"Keep company?"

"Yes ma'am, keep company. If your Pa was here I would ask him permission but...well, things are different here I guess and ... I mean...."

"I would be pleased to keep company with you Heath, very pleased."

Heath leaned down and kissed her forehead, "Thank you." Then reached for the front door knob.

Hope put her hand on his to stop him from turning it. "I thank you."

"Do you mind if I..., well, maybe it's too soon. Do you think it's ....." The young couple stood at the doorway and stared at each other, smiles warming their faces.

B

The front door opened and in walked Hope Dougherty with Heath following directly behind her. Victoria entered from the front parlor and greeted the two smiling faces.

"Welcome Hope I am so glad you could share this day with us,” she notices Hope carrying a covered basket on her arm, "Goodness, what's this? You didn't have to bring anything."

"Mrs. Barkley," Hope smiled sweetly at her hostess, “Now no self respecting Irish lass would come to a home for dinner without bringing something for the feast. This is my Ma's own recipe for Irish Soda Bread."

She gladly accepts the young woman’s basket and hands it over to Silas. "Well, I haven't had good Irish soda bread in years, this is going to be a treat!" Victoria hugs her and notices her cold cheeks, "My you have rosy red cheeks, and it must be cold outside." She comments.

"Just a little bit chilly. But, its nothing compared to back home; I find Stockton’s weather to be quite mild actually." Hope allows Heath to remove her coat and hands him her suede gloves.

"Heath, I do hope you provided this poor girl with a nice warm blanket for the ride here.”

"Of course I did Mother, I made sure Hope was quite warm for the ride over.” He gives Hope a wink and grin.

"That is a fact, I was warm and toasty all the way from town.” Hope returns Heath’s grin. “By the way, where's my cousin?"

"Laura and Nick are upstairs, they will be down directly." Victoria takes Hope’s arm and leads her into the parlor.

Jarrod walks out of the library, "Ah, I thought I heard the lovely voice of Stockton's best school teacher." He wraps his arm around Hope's shoulder leading her toward the sofa.

"Happy Thanksgiving Jarrod, from Stockton's only school teacher."

"And how are those ruffians, have you been refereeing any more boxing matches? Or perhaps, have you learned your lesson young lady and managed to stay out of it?"

"Now counselor, I am sure that you realize that it takes a woman to be a peacemaker."

"I thought as much," He shakes his finger at her, as he walks to the bar table in the parlor.

"Wonderful Jarrod, we finally agree." Hope teases good-naturedly.

"Ah woman, you cut me to the quick with that sharp wit of yours! I really should know better than to attempt to spar with you, but I do so love a challenge. Sherry my dear?"

"A wee bit, thank you." Hope settled herself on the sofa.

"A wee bit, for the lovely lady. How about you Heath?"

"I'll have a wee bit myself, only make mine whiskey,” he settled beside Hope.

B

Upstairs, Laura is laying on her stomach on the bed, dressed in her petticoat; Nick lays beside her, his elbow propped up on a pillow, his head resting on his hand and his other hand rubbing the small of her back. His hazel eyes remain on her, carefully watching his milady.

"Hey, didya fall asleep?" He asked.

"Almost. Mmm, the way you rub my back, it relaxes me so. I’m trying not to fall asleep, but you’re making it very difficult.”

"No one will blame you if you take a nap. Why don't you stay up here and rest for a bit, I'll take care of everything for you.”

"No I couldn't do that, we're expecting company. What time is it?"

"Just about four."

"Is anyone here yet?" She asks, trying to fight the heavy eyelids and the drowsiness she feels.

"I think Heath pulled up with Hope."

"Then I should get up." She slowly sits up; swinging her legs over the side, and gives her back a stretch, "Ah, that does feel better."

"You look tired, love."

"I'm fine Nick." She walks over to her vanity table, sits down and brushes her hair. Nick gets up from the bed but doesn’t take his eyes off her, he continues to watch her even as he pulls his boots on.

"You're not fine! You're tired and you're white as a sheet! I wouldn't be a bit surprised if you had a fever." He walks behind her and feels her forehead with the back of his hand.

Laura pushes his hand away, exasperated. "I do not have a fever, I'm fine! There is nothing wrong with me, for God's sakes women have been having babies since the beginning of time. You act like I'm the first!"

"You're the first to have mine!"

She completely turns around in her chair and stares at him angrily, “What did you say?”

"Ours! I meant to say ours! Okay?! OURS!" He throws his arms up in the air and yanks his tie from atop the dresser.

"That's better!" she turns back and continues brushing her hair, she looks at herself in the mirror, "You're right, I do look a little pale. I'll put on some of the powder that Lottie gave me, that should take care of it."

"It may hide it, but you are still tired."

"I'll get rest tonight, I promise Nick." Though she only allows her husband to see her frustrations over his trying to coddle her; she cannot help appreciate his obvious love and concern for her and their baby.

"You didn't get much rest last night, you were tossing and turning."

"That was Aunt Polly's fault,” Laura replies. “She was after me again about the baby being baptized."

"What's the harm in it? We can get the kid baptized."

"Nick, that's not all there is to it! You're talking about a commitment to the church, and I'm not ready for that."

"You were raised a Catholic. What's the problem? I'll take ya to that church if that’s what ya want."

"I was not raised a Catholic. The church we attended while I was in school was non-denominational, and that was fine with me."

"Your family is Catholic; Hope, Aunt Polly, they both go to the mission church."

"My family is not Catholic, you are my family, this baby is my family. That's all that really matters to me."

"You are a stubborn woman."

"I really don't want to talk about this anymore, I have already exhausted this subject with Aunt Polly and I don't care to talk about it any further with you."

"Have you talked to Hope about it?"

"No, and I don't intend to."

"I'm surprised you usually talk to her about everything."

"Not everything." She walks over to the armoire and pulls out an emerald green dress. She holds it up to herself, "What do you think? Pretty isn't it? Madame Claire made it especially for me. I was going to wear it for my first committee meeting. But I think it will be nice to wear it today, it's rather festive don't you thing?"

Nick looks at her quizzically, "What committee meeting?"

"For the library. We will have our first one in January. Remember, I'm the Stockton Library committee chairwoman," she states proudly with a smile.

"Oh yeah, that thing Jarrod set up for you. Well, who are you going to get to replace you?"

"Replace me? Why on earth would I want to do that?"

"Did you suddenly forget, you're going to be a mother?"

"Believe me, I have not forgotten, this baby reminds me every minute." she rubs the small of her back as another pain surfaces.

"You can't be running the Library committee and be a mother."

"Of course I can!"

Nick repeats himself, with more volume "You can't run the library and be a mother!"

"Why not, you can run this ranch and be a father!"

"Very funny."

She pulls on her dress and stands in front of him to have him button it, "You know there is a lot of work running the library committee. I will be responsible for overseeing to the renovations of the Judicial Building, then of course we need to procure more donations for new books."

"And what are you going to do with Nick Jr., carry him around like an Indian squaw?"

"She, Susan by the way, will be attended to by a wet nurse when I can't." She looks at herself in the mirror smoothing out her dress, and primping her hair.

"A WET NURSE?! You're gonna let some stranger suckle our son?!"

"Or daughter. And it won't be a stranger. I'm sure we can find a suitable one from the Mission. We need a baby nurse after all, when the time is closer I will interview some women, I'm sure we can find someone. Maybe Padre Sanchez knows a woman we can use."

"You are not going to let some stranger to feed our baby!" he clamps his fists shut and plants them firmly on his hips.

"Nick,” Laura sighs at her husband, sometimes that man of hers was just so backwards. “It's done all the time. It's not a new idea. Women have been doing it for ages."

"You are not pawning off our child on some stranger to feed!"

"Unless you can feed this child yourself you have nothing to say about it!" She echoes his stance with her hands on her hips.

"I don't want to argue with you about this!"

"Then don't!" She opens the bedroom door and walks out, leaving him infuriated.

"DAMN YOU WOMAN!"

Part 51

Downstairs, Laura greeted her cousin with a hug and a kiss. Hope instantly noticed make up covering her pale, tired look. She whispered in her ear, "You're not fooling anyone with that paint on your face. You don't look well."

Laura chose to ignore Hope's comment, "I'm fine Hope, thank you for asking."

"And where's Nick, Laura?" Asked Aunt Polly.

Laura sighed, barely looking at her annoying aunt. "He's on his way. So Hope did you bring the Irish soda bread you promised?"

"Yes, safely tucked in the larder for later."

Heath entered with a glass of milk, "Hey Sis, Silas sent this out for you. You okay, ya look kinda pale." Heath put his arm around Laura and placed his cheek near her forehead to feel it, "humm, no fever, here's your milk, drink up."

"I wish you would all stop coddling me, I'm fine, and I don't look pale."

"If ya say so," said Heath, "so what's this?" Heath rubbed his thumb on her cheek brushing off her make up, "goin' to the saloon later?" he teased.

She slapped his hand away, "Would you leave me alone! Honestly! Go sit down!"

"What does Heath mean? Going to a saloon? You're not cavorting with those women again are you Laura?" Inquired Aunt Polly with another worried expression on her face.

"Don't pay attention to him, he's just teasing." She glared at Heath, who smiled back sweetly.

Nick stepped off the staircase, dressed in dark pants, white shirt and black ribbon tie. "Hello Hope." he said flatly hardly glancing at anyone else in the room.

"Hello Nick, Happy Thanksgiving."

"Same to you." He walked over to the bar and poured himself a whiskey, then settled himself across the room, away from the others, in a chair. Hope returned to her seat. Laura sat down in a chair by herself, near the fireplace. Avoiding any eye contact with her Aunt, she sipped her milk and stared into the warm, crackling fire. An awkward silence fills the room.

Victoria walked in the room with a smile on her face, which immediately disappeared when she witnessed her gathered family. "Well, now here's a happy gathering." She stood hands on hips. Heath joined his mother's side, "Can I get you anything, Mother?"

"A more festive gathering would be nice."

"I suspect I might haveta take ya to another house," Heath grins.

"Might haveta Heath," she imitates her son good naturedly.

Laura hurriedly stood from her chair, "Would you excuse me please." Nick's concerned eyes watch his wife as she disappeared into the dining room, leading into the kitchen. He assumed she was going to check on dinner so he moved again to pour another drink then continued to ignore everyone in the room.

"Well, I think I'll have a sherry Jarrod. Silas said dinner will be ready in twenty minutes."

"Of course mother."

In the kitchen, Laura rushed by Silas as he basted the turkey, "oh Mrs. Nick, don't ya wanna take a look at the bird? Isn't he fine lookin'?"

Laura gave a slight nod of approval, hardly looking at the oven as she rushed upstairs, the palm of her hand covering her mouth. She prayed she'd make it to the bathroom in time. She flew into the room and crouched on the floor near the commode to give up what little breakfast she had that morning. Finishing the vile wretching she sat back on the floor, leaning against the bathtub. She took deep breaths to calm her stomach.

"Damn how am I going to eat dinner I can't keep anything down. Ahh, my back again! Having a baby can't always feel this miserable, no one would have them!" She rubbed her back as she pushed herself up from the floor grabbing onto the sink. She stared into the mirror, "Ah, I look awful!" She poured cold water into a basin and attempted to scrub the color back in her cheeks.

B

A short while later, the family gathered in the dining room, after Silas called dinner.

"Doesn't everything look beautiful? You do set a lovely table Mrs. Barkley." Hope said admiringly.

"Thank you Hope, Laura did quite a bit herself yesterday helping me polish the silver. Speaking of which where is she?"

"I'm right here, sorry to keep you waiting." She very gingerly sat beside her husband.

"You didn't keep us waiting, dear. Are you all right?" Victoria couldn't help noticing the wanness of her daughter-in-law.

"Yes, fine thank you." Weakly she unraveled her napkin, placing it on her lap and she tried to keep her head still, in an effort to fight off the waves of nausea.

Silas brought out the turkey on a huge silver platter for all to admire.

"Now that's one fine looking bird," Heath praises as Silas sets the bird in front of Jarrod who stands at the ready with carving tools in hand.

"Now don't take a knife to that bird yet. I want to break with tradition this year and say grace instead of Jarrod if you don't mind dear."

"Not at all Mother, be my guest."

"Can we all join hands and bow our heads, 'Dear Lord, we thank you once again for gathering us together as a family to enjoy this fine feast. We are especially thankful for the new additions to this table and to our family, Nick's wife Laura, her family, Polly Thomas and Hope Dougherty, and the little one who is to come. We ask you Lord to bless all those in our family who could not be with us, but are here in spirit, my husband Tom, Heath's mother Leah, Laura's parents Carson and Meredith, and all those others whom we keep close to our hearts. Amen."

"That was beautiful mother," praised Jarrod.

"Yes Mother, thank you for that." Heath smiled.

"Where's Audra? She's missing?" Nick stated holding his eating utensils up and ready.

"Finally noticed did you brother Nick? Audra is celebrating with The Wheeler family this year."

"Yes, and at Christmas, Carl will be here with us for dinner," Victoria added for Jarrod.

"Sounds like they are getting serious," guessed Heath.

"It should, they've been courtin' on and off for years!" Nick huffed.

"Now it hasn't been that long Nick, they really only started to get serious at your wedding. Carl was a bit put out when Audra was showering all her attentions on Lyle, you know Emma Stanley's boy," adds Victoria.

"Still, if ya gonna be courtin' that long you might as well tie the knot!"

"Not everyone is like you Nick," Jarrod began to carve the turkey.

"I don't waste time!"

Heath taps Hope's shoulder, "That's a fact! 'course Nick was afraid if Laura thought about it too much she'd come to her senses and bolt!" Heath winks at Laura.

"I could say somethin' but we're in mixed company!" Nick waves a fork at Heath who sparkles with a grin.

"And we all really appreciate your restraint Nick. Pass Hope's delicious soda bread to your husband Laura." Victoria offers the serving tray to her daughter-in-law. Nick takes a slice of the bread and sniffs it.

"Smells good. Do ya put butter on this bread, never had it before."

"It can stand on its own," Hope answered with an assuring nod.

Nick takes a bite out of it, "Mmmm, not bad Tidbit."

"Thank you."

"Well, now that Laura has successfully got Nick to do a taste testing for us and we are assured that Hope didn’t do Nick in, we can all partake in it."

"Now I would never do that Jarrod."

"There ya see, I've managed to win Hope over with my charm."

"Mmm, that's a fact Nick; that and I don't want my new little cousin to be fatherless."

Jarrod stands at the ready to serve the bird, "Now enough of this chatter, this bird is ready to be eaten. Who wants white and who wants dark and don't all speak up at once!"

Orders fill Jarrod's ears, "dark, white, white, I'll have white, give me dark, a little of both for me."

"Humph, yes well, thanks for listening everybody," Jarrod feigned annoyance.

The plates are passed and everyone starts enjoying the sumptuous Thanksgiving feast.

"This is a fine bird you got Heath. Ya did good."

"Thanks Nick, ya know he was a tough ole bird, he put up quite a struggle. Gave me a powerful fight."

"Ah huh, right Heath..." Nick took a serious bite of his food.

"He did, I hunted after this bird for miles. He was the most cunning bird I ever had in my sites."

"Cunning? A turkey? Is this story going to be as long as your fish tale?" Nick sneered.

"Whadaya talkin' about?! I did catch a fish as long as yer arm just last week! Didn't I Hope? She was there. Could I help it if it got away?"

"How about it Hope, just how big was that fish that Heath supposedly caught?"

"As long as my arm...perhaps." Hope confessed smiling.

"Ah, I thought so, considerably less! Tidbit wouldn't lie, even for the likes of you!" He waves his fork at his blond brother.

"Weren't no lie, it's just the way ya look at things is all." Heath's chuckle rang throughout the room.

Part 52

After, the diners didn't care to move from the dinner table as they languidly sat sipping wine. During much of the dinner Hope had noticed that Laura had been unusually quiet. She watched her cousin from the corner of her eye.

"That was a wonderful feast. I do believe it's the best bird we ever had."

"Ah, you say that every year Jarrod."

"And every year I'm right."

"That was a very good bird," Nick breezed, relaxed from a full stomach.

"Yes, it was good," his wife agreed quietly.

Nick looked over at her plate, "You hardly ate a thing. You should eat more than that, you're eating for two you know." He said with a hint of concern for his soon to be extended family.

"I had enough Nick, really. Would you excuse me please." She placed her napkin on her plate and carefully rose from her seat. Holding her stomach in with her hand she walked slowly out of the room.

Hope stared after her cousin who was now rubbing her back. She dropped her napkin on the table. "Would you excuse me please? Wait up Laura I'll go with you."

Before Laura has a chance to protest Hope was by her side as she entered the foyer, "What's wrong with you?"

"I'm fine, it's just an upset stomach, I wasn't really feeling that well before you came, I thought it would pass but it hasn't. I think maybe I'll go upstairs and rest a bit." Laura reached the stairs. She clutched the railing to steady herself as another wave of nausea struck.

Hope grasped her waist giving support, "This is more than an upset stomach. Tell me what's going on L.?"

"I'm a ... think...maybe it's food poisoning.. I really feel awful Hope." Beads of perspiration began to form on her brow as the nausea and back pain continue to build in intensity.

"Why don't I help you to bed?"

"I think that's a very good idea..." Laura began ascending the stairs with Hope's help; suddenly she doubled over in pain. "I don't think I can make it up the stairs, maybe you should call...."

"N.N.N.I.I.I.I.I.C.C.C.C.K.K.K.K.K!!" Hope gave out a shrill scream. Nick flew out of the dining room with Jarrod and Heath close behind, then Victoria and Aunt Polly.

"Oh God, what's wrong!"

"She's in pain she can't make it up the stairs."

"OH MY GOD!" Victoria cried out. Nick scooped her up in his arms, and began to head up stairs, but the movement caused her to yell out in pain, Nick stood rooted on the step, looking and feeling helpless.

"Nick bring her in the spare bedroom," his Mother ordered.

"NO, it's not time ....please....!" Laura pleaded, tightly clutching her husband's neck. Nick, eyed his mother, then his wife, before making a decision.

His fearful eyes were fixed on her when he spoke. "Trust me, it's going to be alright."

In too much pain Laura resignedly nodded. Nick proceeded to the spare bedroom downstairs. Victoria rushed ahead to pull down the bed covers. Hope followed close behind Nick and watched as he carefully laid his wife down.

Hope nudged Nick out of the way, "You go on the other side of the bed, roll her over while I take her dress off." Nick immediately obeyed the young woman who seemed to take charge of the situation.

"Laura, we're going to move you over to the side, you just stay where you are, Nick and I will do all the work, okay?" Hope gestured to Nick who gently began to turn his ill wife toward him. "Easy now. That's it, easy. Laura I'm going to take your dress off so you'll be more comfortable." Laura nodded, the short movement caused another stitch of pain that coursed through the stomach from her back.

"Nick?" she whimpered through tears of pain.

"I'm right here sweetheart, you're gonna be just fine, you'll see."

"Mrs. Barkley could you go upstairs and get her a nightgown to wear." Hope suggested.

"Of course." Victoria rushed out of the room.

Outside the spare bedroom Heath stopped her, "Mother, it's not food poisoning is it?"

Victoria shook her head, tears filling her eyes, "I wish it were Heath, but it doesn't ... excuse me, I have to go."

Hearing Heath's voice, Hope left the bedroom, "Heath?"

"Hope? What's going on?"

Hope tenderly touched his arm. "Heath I need you to get on the fastest horse this ranch has and get the doctor here as quickly as you can. Please hurry!" She pleaded.

"I'm already out the door." Heath lightly dropped a kiss on top of her soft brown hair before he

rushed out, barely taking the time to get his jacket from the foyer. Jarrod and Aunt Polly joined Hope.

"Is there anything I can do Hope?" Jarrod asked worried.

"Not yet, I will let you know Jarrod, thank you."

"What's happening to my niece?" Hope took a deep breath as she considered the question.

"I fear... I fear she's gone into labor, Miss Thomas."

"Oh no, it's too soon! Sweet Jesus! The poor child!"

"We may be able to stop it. We can only pray that it will. She's going to need complete bed rest from here on out."

"She already has my prayers."

"And mine as well. Excuse me, I better get back in there." Hope swiftly returned to the bedroom.

Part 53

Nick casted expectant eyes at Hope. "She's in pain Hope. What do we do?" Nick felt helpless and the idea of having no control over the situation was something he could hardly bear. He couldn’t allow anything to happen to his Milady and he raised his head in a silent prayer to the heavens.

Hope didn't answer but leaned over the bed to feel her cousin’s forehead, "She's warm. Laura girl, how are you feeling? Tell me what hurts."

"Stomach pains... sharp...back ....hurts.... Why is it so dark?" She asked weakly.

"I'll light the lamp honey, it's a bit dark in here. It's late ya know." Nick offered.

"Time?"

"Almost eight." Nick answered with a soothing voice, "you just try to relax now, everything's going to be fine."

"Laura, bend your legs dearie, that should help ease the pain a bit," advised Hope.

"Anyone go for the doctor?" Nick asked.

"I sent Heath."

"Good. Ya hear that honey, Heath's gonna get the doctor, you'll be right as rain in no time, you'll see." Laura nodded, then shut her eyes, grimacing in pain as beads of sweat streaked her face. Nick felt her forehead again, "Hope she's burning up."

Hope closed her eyes in frustration with thoughts whirling in her head as to what her next move should be. She said a silent prayer that something would occur to her. In her heart she feared she knew what was happening, but she couldn't let herself dwell on it. 'First things first,' Ma always said. "Okay, here's what we do. Do you have any ice?"

"Yes, I can get ice, " Victoria answered, grateful to be doing something, she rushed away.

Laura's pleading eyes turned toward her husband. She knew he was the strongest man in the world. Her Nick could do anything, he would take care of her. His clear hazel eyes held fear, but it didn't shake her confidence in him, it only made her love him more. She lick her dry lips. "Thirsty..." came the raspy voice.

"Mother's getting some ice chips, ya got a little fever is all, from the food poisoning. That Heath just got us a lousy bird. I'll fix him, you see if I don't!" Nick gave his best reassuring grin.

"No...not....Heath's fault... baby...too soon...I'm sorry Nick...." New tears left trails down her cheeks.

Nick ran his hand over her face, wiping the wetness with his thumb. "Hey, stop that, it's not your fault, don't go blaming yourself now okay? I don't wanna hear that kinda talk from you Milady."

"Laura, we need you to stay calm." Hope warned, "If you stay calm the pain will stop, so we need you to relax; don't go thinking any bad thoughts, understand?" Laura nodded and attempted to sleep.

Victoria rushed in with a bowl of ice chips, "I have ice, Silas is cutting more if we need it. How is she?"

"She's complaining about being thirsty," Nick's words tightened in his throat. He felt so completely helpless. He would have gladly cut off his arm if it could take her pain away. His very soul screamed out for some relief for his Laura. She was his heart and it was breaking.

"Here then give her some bits of ice." Victoria handed the bowl to Nick. In a mother's gesture she felt her daughter-in-law's head, "She burning up."

"Mama....?" Laura cried out when she felt the feminine hand.

"Laura, do you know where you are?" asked Hope.

"Mama, what day is it?"

"Laura, it's me your cousin Hope. Remember?"

"Hope? Mama was here.... I heard her voice, ...I felt her, ...Mama's here."

"No dear, that was Mrs. Barkley you heard. Laura can you tell me where you are?"

"Barkley?... Nick, where's Nick?"

"I'm right here, right by your side honey, like always." he squeezed her hand to acknowledge his presence.

"It's so hot, Nick.... is it summertime?"

"No my love, we're just coming into winter."

"Winter? ... it's too soon... I need to stop ...." her voice trailed off. Nick placed ice on her lips, "Thank you," she whispered, suddenly she pushed his hand away from her mouth, "Something's wrong... everything's strange...." Her voice held a new fearfulness.

"Whadaya mean Honey?"

"You look strange, I can't see you very well, ...maybe the light. My eyes can't focus..."

"Laura, can you describe what you see? What looks strange dearie?" Hope leaned over the bed stroking her cousin's head with a cool compress.

Laura turned back to face her, "I see half things... half faces.... Nick?" she faced him again.

"I'm right here sweetheart, tell me what it is you see."

"I can see you but, .... it must be dark ... only see half your face...looks strange....everything is strange looking."

"Look at me Laura, what do you see?" Hope was concerned as the room was well lit.

"Half. ... I can see half your face..." she rubbed her eyes, "...can't see well..."

"Look at the foot of the bed; tell me what you see there?" asked Hope, trying to hide a worried voice.

"Victoria, I see ... half a face. Why does everyone look so strange? I don't want to look anymore, don't make me...please."

Laura shook her head back and forth as more tears traced her cheeks. Hope placed a calming hand on her cousin, "Shusshh. relax now, calm down, don't move... close your eyes, you don't have to look at anything, shussh..."

Her cousin's soothing voice seemed to calm her once again as she tried once more to sleep. Hope moved quicker now as she placed a firm hand on Victoria's shoulder, "You must get lots of pillows from the beds, get the others to help you and bring them in here."

Victoria obediently rushed out to complete her new task. Nick's eyes focused on Hope, no longer able to hide his worried look, "Hope, tell me what's going on. I need to know!"

"Easy Nick I can't lose you, you need to keep her calm, keep talking to her calmly, try to keep her quiet if you can, I'll be right back."

Hope met Jarrod outside the room, "Jarrod do you know where you can get some old bedsheets?"

"Yes, in the linen closet."

"Go get them please, I need them."

Jarrod quickly complied with her wish. Hope gathered the sheets in her arms, giving Jarrod a solemn thank you.

"Is there anything else I can do, Hope please, I want to help anyway I can."

"Yes, I want you to dig a hole near the garden, two feet deep, one and a half feet long, one foot wide. Remember, not in the garden, but by it. Find some good soft dirt. Excuse me, I have to get back in there."

Hope rushed in with the sheets just as Victoria arrived with Aunt Polly behind her holding as many pillows as the two of them could carry. Hope set them around Laura. Nick helped by placing the pillows near his wife, silently trusting that Hope knew what she is doing.

"Hot. What day is it Nick?"

"Close your eyes sweetheart, relax, it's Thanksgiving day."

"Don't remember... did we have your birthday party?"

"We had a quiet dinner in town, just the two of us, we didn't want any fuss. Besides we already went to Indian Springs in June, remember? Before we got married."

"Don't remember that," his wife answered, eyes still closed. Nick's frightened face did not go unnoticed by Hope, who gave him a calming sign with her hand, and a quiet finger to her lips, as she stood there and waited. Aunt Polly vacated the room, leaving only Victoria at her former position at the foot of the bed, silent tears freely falling. Hope motioned quietly to Victoria to check under the bed linens. Victoria did, relieved, she shook her head in a silent answer.

Only hushed breathing could be heard as all eyes watched and waited. Silent prayers were given up to the heavens and the night stillness filled the room with an ominous quiet.

"NICK! Where are you?!... AHHH....OWWW, it's hurts! NICK! ...It hurts so much! Help me!"

Laura brought her legs up as the cramps in her stomach became unbearable. Nick held her hand tightly, "I'm right here sweetheart! I'm right here for you!" His voice was in near panic, feeling her pain in his very soul. Victoria pulled up the sheets again and gave out a short gasp. Hope moved toward the end of the bed. Her eyes filled with tears at the dreadful sight. Hope and Victoria move quickly to gather the clean sheets around the end of the bed as the blood spilt it contents, soaking the clean sheets. Nick continued to tightly hold onto Laura's hand as she painfully struggled to deliver the dead baby.

Part 54

Nick sat quietly by his wife’s side, he held her hand, stroking her palm with his thumb. He calmly watched the two women clean up the bloody remnants. His thoughts were on Laura alone and he wouldn't allow himself to think about what they had just lost.

Hope gathered the soiled bundle and brought it out to Jarrod. He gently took the tiny burden from her loving arms. " Hope is this...?" She nodded, now allowing her tears to flow. "You knew all along didn't you?"

"Yes..." her voice trailed off as tears choked.

Jarrod shifted the burden to one arm and placed the other over Hope's shoulder, he kissed her tenderly on the forehead, "I'm so sorry." Then quietly left her alone to set about his grim task.

Suddenly Nick yelled out Hope's name. She dashed into the room to find Laura thrashing about on the bed. She moved quickly, holding the pillows in place, Victoria and Nick followed her example, making sure the patient didn't hurt herself. Victoria held down her arms as Laura's seizure became a series of violent shakes. Everyone in the room struggled to hold down the patient and after only a minute, the seizure dissipated. But the room's occupants felt as if an eternity had come and gone.

"It's over..." Hope breathes a sigh of relief and removed the pillows.

"Will it happen again Hope?" Nick's face was ashened with fear.

"No, not again, it's passed. Now we wait for the doctor to get here. Victoria is she bleeding?" Victoria picked up the bedsheets again and nodded sadly. Hope closed her eyes and let out a long weary sigh, "Oh dear God, please not this...."

"Hope? What's going on? HOPE! Tell me!" Nick cried out frantically.

"She hemorrhaging Nick, I'm... there's nothing we can do now... We have to wait for the doctor, I'm sorry." Hope tried to allay Nick's fears, but found that her own were beginning to get the better of her.

Nick flew to his feet grabbing Hope by the shoulders and shaking her, "We gotta do something!" He nearly shouted, fear gripping him. He looked down at his now sleeping wife and took in a deep breath; lowering his voice before speaking again. "We can't let her bleed to death!"

"Nick, please...you're hurting me!"

Victoria seized Nick's arms in an effort to release Hope from his powerful grip. "NICK STOP THIS NOW! Let her go!"

Ashamed, Nick pulled away, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. Please forgive me."

Hope patted his arm, " It's alright Nick, I understand. "Wait, I think I hear Heath with the doctor! Oh thank the Good Lord!" Forgetting her usual reserve, Hope gratefully rushed into Heath's welcoming arms. The doctor pulled off his overcoat haphazardly tossing it on a chair.

"Tell me we're not too late." Heath murmured in Hope's ear almost as a prayer.

"She lost the baby, but now she can't stop bleeding." Hope directed her saddened, frightened eyes to the good doctor. "Doctor, I pray to God you can do something for her."

"I'll do my best." He gripped his medical bag heading to the room she had just exited.

"Nick, Victoria." Howard Merar greeted them as he entered the bedroom.

"She's bleeding Doc, can you do anything for her?" Nick's pleading eyes searched the doctor's earnest face for any reassurance.

"Who did all this?" the doctor noticed the skillful use of the various items in the room and the good condition of the patient.

"Hope. She was just wonderful. Somehow she managed to keep herself and us together." Victoria answered, through tears of mourning.

"I would say she did a fine job of it. Well, maybe you can help me Victoria, are you up to it?"

"Of course, what do you need me to do?" Victoria wiped her tears dry with the back of her hand.

"I'm going to clean her internally and hopefully that will stop the bleeding. Let's begin. Are you alright there Nick?"

"I'm not leaving her side if that's what you mean." He resolved.

"All right Nick, but I warn you, I need you to stay calm!" Nick nodded surrendering to the doctor's warning.

Part 55

Entering the spacious parlor, Hope moved over to the fireplace and crouched down. She stokes the

dying embers with a poker nearby. Heath walks to the fireplace and tosses another log onto the fire. He watches as sparks shoot up the chimney and then sits down next to Hope with his back to the fire. Wordlessly he searches out what she's feeling in her tired but beautiful face. Flames renew in the fireplace and brings the room back to life with their dancing light. The heat of the fire caresses Hope's face bringing back the warm glow to her cheeks that Heath had become so accustomed to.

"Wanna talk?" Heath asked.

Hope shook her head in answer.

"Wanna cry?"

She wiped an escaping tear with her fingertips, and shook her head again.

"What do you wanna do?"

"Pray, but I can't remember any words to say."

"I'm not much on remembering prayers myself, but my Mama use to read the Bible to me and that was our prayers at night. Would you like me to read it to you, maybe it could help."

"I think I'd like that."

Heath stood, his hand outstretched, she placed her hand in his.

They sat side by side on the sofa in the parlor. Heath had one arm around her shoulder and the Bible resting on his lap, his long legs stretched out on the table before him. Hope tucked her feet under her skirts and leaned into the crook of his arm, listening to his soft, soothing voice.

"Amen, amen I say to you, that you shall lament and weep, but the world shall rejoice; and you shall be made sorrowful, but your sorrow shall be turned into joy....A woman, when she is in labour, hathe sorrow, because her hour is come; but when she hath brought forth the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a child is born into the world. So also you now indeed have sorrow; but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice; and your joy no man shall take from you. And in that day you shall not ask me any thing. Amen, amen, I say to you: if you ask the Father anything in my name, He will give it to you.

...Ask and you shall receive; that your joy will be full." (John ch 16. V. 20-24)

Heath heard shallow breath sounds and realized Hope was having a well deserved nap, he gave her a gentle kiss on top of her head, then continued to read to himself. The clock in the foyer chimed midnight, when Nick entered the parlor. Heath stopped reading, "Nick?" Hope awoke at hearing Nick's name, and scrambled toward him, a questioning look betraying her fear.

Exhausted, blurry hazel eyes looked down at her, "The bleeding stopped. The doctor took my..." Nick's legs buckle under him, Heath rushed to prevent his brother from collapsing onto Hope. He effortlessly carried his weakened brother over his shoulder and set him down on the sofa.

Hope stood over him, and felt his forehead, "He's so pale Heath."

Heath searches his brother until he finds the wrappings on his arm, "...Thought so, he gave blood. I'll go get him some food and drink, you try bringing him around."

Hope crouched beside him, "Nick? Nick wake up, come on Nick, open your eyes." She gently slaps him on the face several times.

Heath re-entered, "He come around yet?"

"I can't seem to get him to...."

Heath placed the food and drink on the table, " Ya gotta give him better than that if ya want him to come around, ... like this." Heath slapped his brother hard a few times across the face. Heath's action caused Hope to wince. "HEY NICK OLD MAN, WAKE UP! COME ON, LETS GO, GET UP!"

"What??" Nick's eyes opened looking around the room, "What happened?"

"Ya passed out Nick, gave too much blood I suspect. Ya never learn do ya? Come on sit up and eat."

"I'm not ..." Heath pulled Nick in a sitting position.

"Aww, shut up and eat, ya know ya need it. You're no good to anyone, all weak in the knees and all, come on. It'll get your strength back."

"Thanks," he sat up and took the offered sustenance.

Dr. Merar entered, "...glad to see you eating Nick, best thing for you now."

"Doctor?" Hope's eyes betrayed a worried look..

"She's going to be fine, her fever broke and Nick's rich Barkley blood seems to have given her some color back in her cheeks. I'm sure she'll recover."

"It's kinda late doc, why don't you stay the night, We can put ya up."

"Oh no thanks Heath, I better be on my way, Emily would only worry and..."

"HOWARD, COME QUICK! THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG!" Victoria yelled out from the spare bedroom. Nick was the first to fly from his seat, rushing to his wife's side.

"Honey, what's the matter?!"

Laura leaned on her elbow her other hand waving in the air in Nick's general direction, as he rushed to her bedside. She was gripped with fear, the heart in her chest pounding wildly.

"NICK, OH ...NICK, I CAN'T SEE! I can't see! Help me, please Nick..."

Part 56

Nick grasped Laura's misguided hand and placed it around his neck; pulling her close in a tight embrace, "I'm right here sweetheart, I 'm right here... Everything is going to be alright, trust me."

Dr. Merar heaved a weighty sigh, as unspoken questions surrounded him.

"I've been afraid this might happen."

"What the devil are you talking about!?" Nick barked. Still holding his wife in an embrace.

"Laura, do you remember the accident you had and the headaches resulting from that?"

"Yes?" she lifted her head from her husband's strong shoulder.

"When you began getting those severe headaches, I had suspicions that you may have developed a blood clot from the head injury."

She wished desperately that she could see the expression on the good doctor's face, "You never told me."

"As long as it only remained headaches, it wasn't a cause for worry. It was certainly better to deal with the headaches then any of the other possible alternatives."

"Just what are you talking about Doc?!" Nick demanded. He sat beside her on the bed.

"I'm afraid that blood clots can move, Nick. It moves through the blood vessels. In the brain, it can move towards the optical nerve, placing pressure on it and causing temporary or even permanent blindness." The doctor took another cleansing breath before continuing, "I was hoping that the clot would stay where it was and the only effect Laura would feel were the headaches and that could be controlled with medication."

A mixture of anger and fear quickly overcame Nick. He felt his temper slowly rising in the pit of his stomach. "And now you're telling us it moved?"

"Yes Nick, I can't be sure, but that's what I think happened."

"What you THINK HAPPENED?!" Laura placed a calming hand on Nick's arm to stop him from getting any angrier.

"Please Doctor, can you tell us what caused it to move?" She asked.

Dr. Merar shook his head sadly, "I don't know, almost anything can cause it to move. It's hard to say."

"It's hard to say! You've known about this all along and you never told us! Never warned us! Just what the hell kind of doctor are you?!" Nick pulled away from his wife's grasp, taking an angry step towards the doctor.

"Nick please, don't sweetheart. Don't do this!"

"Laura, he didn't say..."

"I know, I know... there's nothing anyone can do about it Nick, not now! It's not the doctor's fault. He didn't cause this to happened to me. Please Nick, I'm begging you. At least now I won't get the headaches anymore. And the blood clot could move again, couldn't it doctor?"

"Yes, it could."

"What aren't ya telling us?" Nick stood rigidly, fists clenched, his eyes a venomous glare.

The doctor knew full well Nick's unyielding temper but he stood his ground fearlessly as he spoke the truth as he knew it to be, "Blood clots can move to anywhere in your body. It can go where it may just cause discomfort, or it can find it's way out or even disappear."

"AND?! Come on, I've known ya long enough to know when you're holding back!" Nick blared.

"And it can move to another part of the body and .... ah..."

"Kill me." Laura said flatly.

"Yes. I'm sorry Laura, I didn't ...I'm sorry."

"Nick, come here please." Laura's arm stretched out into the air. Nick quickly grabbed hold of it as he sat back down on the bed. He marveled how her simple touch seemed to calm the rage he felt inside. "Thank you Doctor for telling us everything. It's good to know. Could you excuse us now please, my husband and I need to talk, if you could all leave us, please."

Laura smiled bravely. She listened as the unseen left the room one by one.

"Are they gone Nick?" She asked quietly.

"Yes my love."

"Good." She wrapped her arms around him as he pushed himself into her embrace. Hazel eyes cried bitterly as she cradled him to her bosom. Their tears mingled as they mourned for their lost and reveled in the fact that they still had each other. "My sweet Nick," she whispered as she gently kissed the top of his head.

"Milady," he said choking through his tears.

Part 57

The weary couple cried themselves to sleep.

Several hours later Laura woke up with the need to relieve herself, she feebly stumbled out of bed and felt around for the bedroom door. Instead of finding the door she found a chest of drawers where their bedroom door was suppose to be.

Disoriented she injured her arm when she banged it against a bureau. "OUCH! What is that doing here!"

She weakly moved around the bureau searching with her hands for the door when a lamp crashed onto the floor causing her to lose her balance and fall, landing on some of the cut glass, "OWW!! OH DAMNIT!!"

"LAURA?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Nick bolted upright in the bed. He saw his wife sitting on the floor crying with her hand bleeding. "Why didn't you wake me?! Look at ya, you're bleeding!" Nick rushed to her side, " Ya shoulda let me help you!"

"I was trying to go the bathroom but I couldn't find the damn door!" She weeped angrily.

"That's because we're not in our room, we're downstairs remember?" He took off his white shirt and wiped the blood from her hand. She sobbed loudly. "Now what are ya crying for? Are you bleeding anywhere else?"

She shook her head hiding her face with her hands, "I... I..."

"You what? Tell me." He wraps his arms around her.

"I soiled myself when I fell, I'm...so.... ashamed!"

"Hey, there's no need to be, you just let Sir Nick take care of his Milady okay? That's what ya got me for, right?" He gave her shoulders a squeeze. "I'll take ya right upstairs and give ya a nice hot bath. Everyone's sleeping so no one will be the wiser. Come on, let me help ya up. Let's go."

He pulls her up onto her feet. She hugs him, sobbing into his chest. "Oh Nick...I feel so helpless."

"Come on, none of that. You're one of the strongest women I know! Lets see how much strength I got to carry you up huh? You probably have more than I have; you got most of my blood in ya."

She gave out a small chuckle. "No wonder I lost control of myself."

He gathered her up in his arms, "Oh fine, that's the thanks I get for giving ya my life's blood, insults!" She tucks her head under his chin and hugs him tightly, smiling through her tears. He drops a kiss on her head, as he carries her upstairs. "Women!" he muttered to himself.

B

The church was decorated for Christmas; garlands of green pine adorned the walls, with large red satin bows. Above the altar was a large wooden cross with the crucified Christ looking down on the brethren. At the foot of the altar was a large nativity scene. To the left a three foot statue of Mary dressed in shades of blue kneeling in prayer. At the opposite side was a similar size statue of Joseph dressed in hues of brown and holding a shepherd's staff. The eyes of both statues were directed to an empty straw laden manger. Her hand touched the straw and noticed the warmth that radiated where a body had once lain.

"Where's the baby?"

"Here." the familiar voice directed her to look upon the altar. His eyes were cold as death itself as he stood poised, a sacrificial dagger in his hands, the glistening blade ready to strike at the heart of the babe in swaddling clothes as the child innocently kicked them loose.

"Johnny! No!"

His guttural voice tore at her heart, growling, "Everyone pays for their sins Laurie. It's your turn!" The dark, sinewy arms drove the blade into it's target, the crimson liquid splattered, covering the altar, the cross, the walls, until blackness surrounded the room...

"Don't take my baby! Don't take my baby!" Forceful hands whipped her away from the sight, shaking her....,

"WAKE UP! WAKE UP! OPEN YOUR EYES! YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DREAM!"

Another familiar voice, brought her back to safety, "Nick?"

"Yes it's me! You were having a bad dream but it's all over now."

"He took our baby Nick! He took our baby!" she sobbed into his chest.

"What are you talking about?! Who took our baby?"

Laura was panicking, her skin glazed with sweat and he could feel her heart pounding.

"Johnny! He was here. He took our baby! He did it, he killed him! I saw him do it!"

"No one took our baby, it's dead honey. Don't you remember? I'm sorry sweetheart, but our baby is gone." He rocked her as she wept. "Shush, it's okay, it's all over, nothing bad is ever going to happen to you again, I promise. You're never going to go through this again, never."

She pulled from his embrace, "Nick, I can't go on like this, I have to talk to someone, I have to confess."

"You have to confess? Confess what? You've done nothing wrong!"

"I have Nick. You and I both know the truth. I know you said not to speak about it, but I can't let it go. I have to tell someone, otherwise we will never be free of him. He will always be a chain weighing us down."

"What are you talkin' about?" Nick pulled away at arms length, a confused look on his worried face.

"Johnny, you know I killed him... You saw....I have to confess... I have to, he won't let us be free."

Nick took hold of her shoulders and shook them angrily, "NO! NOT EVER! ...YOU CAN'T TELL ANYONE! Laura I can't lose you, I WON'T! I've lost too much already, no more! I'm not giving you up!"

"Please Nick, I..."

"Telling someone won't change anything! It won't bring back our baby or your sight! I'm not letting you do this! I will stop you! ...Anyway I can, I swear to God I will!"

"Nick please..."

"NO! NEVER! Don't you realize they'll throw you in jail! Probably hang you! Hell, they'll hang us both. I was the one who covered it up!"

"No Nick, I would never let them blame you, I was the one who killed him. I killed Johnny Ray!"

"SHUT UP! DAMN YOU! SHUT UP!" He clinged tightly to his wife. Hot angry tears spilled from his eyes. His mind searching for ways to save her from herself. He was not going to let her hang for a low life scum like Ray. He deserved what he got! They already paid a high price for Johnny Ray's death and he wasn't going to allow his beloved wife to suffer anymore because of him!

Part 58

Several days later, Nick answered a knock at the door and was surprised to find Padre Sanchez on their doorstep.

"Good morning Mr. Barkley."

"Padre." Nick nodded a greeting to the monk priest. "What can I do for you?"

"I was invited here, by your wife."

"No, I'm sure you're mistaken Padre, my wife is ill, she wouldn't ask for any visitors, and certainly not... I mean... Maybe it was my wife's aunt who invited you? Polly Thomas?"

"No, I am certain the request came from your wife, Mrs. Barkley. She sent Ciego to fetch me." Nick looked outside and saw Ciego, their gardener sitting in the Barkley buggy.

"She's really not well Padre, I don't think it's a good idea to see her now."

"I am sorry Mr. Barkley but she did ask me to come here. Please if you don't mind telling her I'm here. I would appreciate it."

Nick let out a deep sigh and ascended the stairs to their bedroom. He found his wife sitting at her vanity table brushing her hair.

"Nick?" She called out when she heard the door open.

"Yeah."

"Do I look all right? How is my hair?" She stood, holding on the chair for support.

"How come you're not in bed resting like you're suppose to!?"

"I just got up Nick, I've been in bed most of the morning. I'm feeling better. A few hours sitting up won't hurt. Could you open the window a little bit. It's so stuffy in here. I want to smell the crisp cold air outside."

"Did you sent for Padre Sanchez?" He walked toward the window to do her bidding.

"Yes I did."

"Why?!"

"I needed to speak to him." She carefully felt her way toward his voice. He rushed over and grabbed her hand to lead her to a chair. "Do I look all right? You never answered me. I want to know if I look all right for visitors. I know Audra said she would help me but I really want to do things on my own."

"You look okay, but you’re still kinda pale. You really should be in bed!"

"Don't be silly I can't receive visitors in bed, it's bad enough I have to receive them here. How's my dress? Are the buttons done up right? Oh and would you ask Silas to bring up some tea for the Padre."

Nick's fists fly to his waist, "Just what the hell is going on here?!"

"Do you know how often you do that when you get all huffy?" She smiled pleasantly.

"Do what?!" He asked annoyed.

"Raise your fists to your hips." She let out a short giggle.

"Woman, you're trying my patience!" Nick self-consciously placed his arms by his side.

"Don't be silly Nick, you have little patience to try. Please send the good father upstairs."

"I don't like this!" He started to ram his fists on his hips but thought better of it.

"Come here." She invited him with arms outstretched.

"What?" He scrunched down in front of her so she wouldn't have to get up from the chair.

"I love you Nick Barkley, you're my knight in shining armor, you always were and you'll always will be. But you can't protect me from this, I need to make amends for so many things I have done in my life. I've blamed others for my sins, but I can't do that anymore. I have to make things right."

"You have nothing to make amends for. You've done nothing wrong." He gently touched her cheek. She caressed his hand with hers.

"Yes I have. Unfortunately it took my blindness to make me see. My eyes are open now to all the misplaced anger I've felt." He was in awe of her serene smile.

"What misplaced anger? What are you talking about?"

"Like the anger I’ve been holding onto towards members of my family. My mother, who was killed because she cared enough to help the orphaned Indian children in Tucson so long ago. I've always blamed those children for her death. That's why I never set foot in the orphanage with Audra. Aunt Polly was right about that. Poor Aunt Polly, I've treated her so badly since she's been here."

"Polly loves you." He gently rubbed the palm of her hand with his own calloused one.

"I know and I've been dreadful to her. I know the reason she had my father send me to the finishing school now."

"You do? How did you find out?" Nick had known since his visit to Boston. Polly had told him the whole angry story, but had sworn him to secrecy. Nick had been furious when he learned about his now dead father-in-law's actions toward his beloved wife.

"I overheard her tell the story to Audra and your mother one night. My father had been angry about a lot of things then. He was angry because my mother died at the Indian orphanage. It turned him against all Indians. In Tucson there were mostly Indian children to play with. I befriended one of them. He was a half breed and his name was Johnny Ray."

"You never told me that." Nick sat on a nearby chair, still holding her hand.

After Mama died, Aunt Polly came out to Arizona. She was very sweet to me, but I wasn't having any of it. I was rather wild, always got into scrapes. Loved being with the boys, I wasn't much into girl things. I've changed since then."

"And I'm grateful for it." Nick smiled. She placed her hand up toward his face to feel it. He kissed her opened palm.

"Papa caught me and Johnny in the barn once."

"What were you doing?"

"Relax, nothing that bad, I was only ten or eleven at the time. Johnny was older. He stole a kiss and Papa caught us. He took after Johnny with a pitchfork. He called him all kinds of terrible names. It was ugly. Worse was he called Johnny's mother a whore. Papa was so angry. He took a belt to me and whipped me within an inch of my life. Aunt Polly had stopped him, but Papa kept yelling. I ran out of the barn and hid behind the door. I remember hearing everything so clearly now:

* * * * * * * * * *

'Take her! Take her out of my sight! The little whore! I don't want her around anymore! I

never wanted her! Never!"

"Brother what are you saying?! She's just a child! How can you say that?!"

"You take her Polly! You take her to live with you in Boston! I can't stand the sight of her!"

"She's your daughter Carson, your flesh and blood. Yours and Merry's! How can you give her away?!"

"I never wanted children. We lived ten years married without children and perfectly happy, then Merry found herself in a family way and well, it was all right when Merry was alive but she's gone now. I can't raise a girl alone. You've seen her! She's a wild cat! You work in that all girl school, you take her!"

"I'm an unmarried woman, I can't take in a child. It would be unseemly you know that. I would lose my job! It can't be done Carson."

"Then if you won't take her I'll put her in an orphanage!"

"An orphanage?! Your own child?! Brother, be reasonable, your grief over losing Meredith is getting the best of you. Don't do this! You must think it through!"

"I've thought about it enough! She's going Polly!"

"NO! She's your only flesh and blood, yours and Meredith's together! I won't let you do this."

"It's done Polly!"

* * * * * * * * * * * *

"But he didn't send you to that orphanage." Nick interrupted her story.

"No, Aunt Polly talked him to selling everything and moving to California for a fresh start. She had an old school friend who was in charge of running a finishing school for girls in San Francisco. Next thing I knew Aunt Polly and I were heading to San Francisco. My father saw us off at the stage depot. Never saw Tucson again."

"Do you miss it, Tucson I mean?"

"No, there wasn't much there to begin with. It was wild town. Not really fit to raise a family. I suppose it's different now. I couldn't believe that my father would let me go like that, so I blamed Aunt Polly. She was the one who talked my father into sending me to that school. I just wouldn't face the truth that my own father didn't want me around. God Nick, I spent half my lifetime trying to get that man to love me."

"He was a hard man Laura. You can't blame yourself for him."

"My father was a broken man. He adored my mother. When he lost her, he lost his very soul. I'll never forget what he said to me the day Johnny put a gun to his head, he said, 'I'm ready to go if I have to. I'm not afraid to die.'

"Don't you see Honey, that would be me if I lost you! I am begging you, please don't confess to Ray's murder. He was so filled with hatred, he was already dead; it was only a matter of time. Please Laura, I can't lose you."

"You'll never lose me Nick Barkley I will always be right there." She smiled as she pointed to his heart. Nick took her small hand in his, brought it to his lips and kissed it, "My sweet Milady."

"My Sir Nick." She whispered, smoothing his hair with her other hand, she gave him a gentle kiss on the lips.

"I love you, more than you'll ever know Laura Meredith Barkley."

"I feel the same about you Nicholas Jonathan Barkley."

"So is that why you feel the need to see Padre Sanchez?"

"Yes, and I promise you, it will go no further than this room, but I need to bear my soul, just as I did to you."

"Well, if you trust him then I will. I'll bring him up." Nick stood and headed toward the door.

"Thank you Sweetheart."

"Just keep your dress covering your ankles."

"Why?" She asked puzzled.

"Because you're wearing one blue stocking and one black one."

"NICK! I AM NOT!" Nick's hearty laugh followed him out the door.

Part 59

Two days before Christmas and the usual hustle and bustle of the holiday had visited the Barkley ranch. Jarrod's sense of smell led him to a familiar odor in the kitchen. He leaned on the doorway, smiling as he watched his blind sister-in-law sitting at the kitchen table happily mixing the contents of a bowl before her. The attorney had marveled at her strength of character. Laura Barkley was intrepid woman, much like his mother, Jarrod understood his brother's attraction to her, the woman paralleled her husband's strength in every way. He had almost envied his brother's good fortune in finding a mate.

Silas stood by her side, measuring the different spices. "Pinch of cinnamon next Missus."

"Good, did you put it in?" She rotated the wooden spoon, all the while smiling gleefully, happy to be feeling useful again. She had decided after she had spoken to Padre Sanchez that she wouldn't let her affliction keep her down. She was determined to do everything a sighted person could do; at least she was going to do her best. Nick did his best to encourage her as well. He had remembered when Jarrod had lost his sight some time before and the difficulty he had adjusting; he wasn't going to let his wife fall prey to that.

"I's surely did."

"Do we have sugar, or honey to add next?"

I's enough honey, 'fraid Miss Audra took most of da sugar for the Christmas cookies for da orphans."

"Ah, no matter, we'll use half honey and the applesauce, our secret ingredient!"

Silas chuckled, then acknowledged Jarrod at the doorway. "Howdy Mr. Jarrod."

"Silas. I couldn't resist the wonderful smell coming from this kitchen. My dear Laura, are you making your famous award winning raisin bread?!"

She laughs at her brother-in-law's comment, "Award winning it is! With dear Silas's patient help. May I have two more spoonfuls Silas?"

"Yes'm, comin' up."

Jarrod sat across her at the table. "So is this effort of yours for the whole family to enjoy or are you only favoring lucky Heath again?"

"This is a Christmas gift for Heath."

"I knew it! He's your favorite brother-in-law."

"Now Jarrod, that's not true! Don't you dare say that! You know I love you both equally."

Her pouty face made him chuckle.

"You are too easy to tease Laura Barkley." He squeezed her hand, giving her cause to smile.

"You're a wicked man Jarrod Barkley! The only reason I'm making this for Heath is he thinks I can't make it for him anymore just because I can't see, but with Silas's help I can and you know how hard Heath is to surprise."

"That I do, but how are you going to surprise him if he smells it the minute he walks in the door? You know he can smell your raisin bread a mile away."

"Oh dear, you're right! I never thought of that! Silas what are we going to do?!"

"I knows Missus, we'll just tell 'em da raisin bread is a gift for some o' Missus Barkley's friends."

"Brilliant Silas! I'm so lucky to be surrounded by brilliant men in this house!"

"Humm, she's being too nice to us Silas, me thinks the lady is complimenting us because she wants lots of Christmas presents!"

"And I better get lots or I'll turn back to my mean old wicked ways again." She teased with a lilting laugh.

Jarrod laughed as he stood and gave her a hug, touching his cheek with hers, "That my dear is impossible! You're much too sweet!"

Nick's loud voice rang out from the foyer. "HEY, ANY PRETTY GALS IN THIS HOUSE FOR ME TO SQUEEZE?!"

"NICK!" Laura stood up, Jarrod instinctively took her arm.

"Careful now, I'll escort you out."

"Thank you Jarrod." She lets him lead her out of the kitchen. In the foyer Nick smiles when he sees his wife and reaches out, taking her from Jarrod's arms.

"Now there's a pretty gal to squeeze!" They embrace each other.

"Miss you."

"What have you been doing all day my love, you smell like a sweet smelling bakery."

"Is Heath with you?"

"No, he's putting the horses away."

"Good, I'm baking him raisin bread and giving it to him as a Christmas present."

"Now how come ya always baking things for Heath?" Nick huffs.

"I like Heath." She grins as she gives him another squeeze around his neck.

"What about me?!" he complains.

"Silly, I love you!"

"Ohh, I see, people you like get baked goods, and what do people you love get?" He smiled teasingly.

"Everything else." She gave him another welcoming hug.

"Now that sounds fair, as long as it's me." He teased.

"It is. Come on, lead me back to the kitchen I have to finish my baking."

Nick slid his arm around her waist and gave Jarrod a cursory nod as he walked by, "Jarrod."

"Nick." A melancholy look crossed Jarrod's face as he watched the jovial couple disappeared into the kitchen .

B

The next day was Christmas Eve and everyone was busy getting ready to attend the Christmas pageant at the Mission Orphanage before Midnight Mass. Audra was excited as she had the important job of producing and narrating the children's play. Upstairs Laura was searching through her armoire. Nick tied on a tie and watched her exasperated.

"Now what are you doing? I thought you decided on the green dress?"

"I changed my mind. Hope has seen me in the green dress. Where's my red one? Is this it Nick?"

She grabbed hold of one of the dresses, Nick gazed at the armoire, "Yeah, that's it."

"Good. Oh wait, is Audra wearing red?"

"I don't know. Who cares?"

"I care! I don't want to wear the same color she has on."

Nick rolled his eyes. "Woman what is wrong with you? You're as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."

"I am not!"

Nick came up behind her and gave her a quick kiss her cheek. "You are!"

She brushed him off with the back of her hand. "Stop sneaking up on me!"

"I love sneaking up on you!" He chuckles. She moves her hand over the other dresses in the armoire, then grabs one of them.

"This feels like my blue one, is it Nick?"

"Yes, it's your blue one."

"Good I'll wear that." she pulls the dress out. Nick takes the dress off the hanger for her.

"Why so nervous? Really, I want to know?" Laura takes a deep breath while considering her answer.

"It's just that it's been years since I've gone to a ...well.... gone to a Catholic church. I don't think I remember how to act."

"Just be yourself." He said flatly.

"Oh Nick, that doesn't help me."

"Stop worrying you'll be fine. Let me help you with that dress." He buttons the back of her dress then smoothes it out with his hands. "There, you look beautiful."

"Nick?"

"What?"

"I want the truth...."

"I said you looked beautiful and I meant it."

"No, not that. I want to know if I'm a burden to you?"

He clasped her shoulders in his large hands. "Milady, since the first day I met you, you have been a burden to me; why should now be any different?!" He gave her a quick teasing kiss. She giggled and touched his face.

"I miss seeing that handsome face!" He captured her hands and kissed each palm, "It's not so handsome anymore. I've got lots of gray hair and worry lines 'cause of you, Woman!"

"You'll always be handsome to me." She leaned closer to accept a kiss from him.

"Come on lets get going, here's your coat and gloves." He helps her with the coat.

"WAIT! I don't have shoes on!"

Nick grabbed a pair of shoes from the bottom of the armoire and placed them on her feet.

"There ya go, better?"

"They don't feel right."

"Well they're not mine."

"Oh Nick...these are my baby shoes." Nick shuts his eyes exasperated, "Damnit honey, I'm sorry I didn't notice them."

Laura bent down to take the shoes off, Nick quickly pulled them from her grasp and threw them on a high shelf in the armoire. Turning back to face her he noticed tears staining her cheeks. "I'm so sorry Sweetheart. I didn't mean to remind you."

She wiped her tears away quickly with her hand, "You didn't remind me Nick, it's never out of my mind."

"Here's your shoes. Let's go my love, their waiting for us." He bends down to help with her shoes.

"Nick?" He raised his head to look up at her, she gifted him with a warm smile.

"What?"

"You're a very special man Nick Barkley." He stood and rewarded her with a kiss.

"Of course I am, after all, I'm quite a catch!"

Part 60

At the Mission church, many of the parishioners gathered in the dining hall of the orphanage to watch the children perform the Christmas pageant. Audra narrated the story by reading the Bible verse. Nick and Laura sat in the back of the hall, away from curious eyes. After the pageant, Padre Sanchez visited them. Nick greeted the priest then sensing the two new friends wanted to talk alone, excused himself to speak with his sister.

"I am so glad you were able to come see my children Mrs. Barkley."

"So am I Padre. Thank you for inviting us." The priest sat beside her.

"I had nothing to do with it, all are welcomed here. How are you feeling this days?"

"Well thank you. I must say Padre talking to you that other day helped me tremendously."

"No more guilt feelings?"

"No more."

"I am happy to say that you do look very peaceful." He gently patted her hand.

"I am. I'm happy and I'm learning to accept my sight loss as an opportunity to see things anew and not as a punishment from God."

"I am pleased that your eyes are finally open to the Our Savior's love. I hope you will be able to stay for midnight mass."

"I don't know if I 'm ready for that Padre." She smiled.

"Trust me, you are ready. All you need to do is take that first frightening step towards Him. Just take hold of His hand."

"But my husband isn't..."

"True, but he is a good man, and I am sure he will support you in any decision you make. Now, if you will excuse me I have to help with the refreshments, the children are all anxious to eat all the wonderful sweets."

"Of course, thank you for coming over to talk to me."

Nick joined her again with a drink and placed it in her hand. "I got some punch for you. What did the padre want?"

"Just to talk. Thank you sweetheart, I am a bit dry."

"Do you want something to eat? There's a lot of good food over there."

"No thank you I'm not hungry, but you go ahead and get something for yourself if you're hungry Nick."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I 'm fine honey, go help yourself."

"Ok, be right back. I won't be very long I promise."

"I'll be here waiting for you."

The smile didn't leave her lips as she listened to the happy sounds and bits of conversations wafting in the air. The smell of the food tempted her senses but she thought better of it and sipped her punch instead. Suddenly she sensed a presence nearby.

"Is someone there?"

"Hello."

"Hello." She smiled at the sound of the child's voice.

"Never seen you here before."

"It's my first time here. I'm Laura, what's your name?"

"Colleen."

"Pretty name, do you know it means 'little girl' in Gaelic?"

"Yes, mama told me. She always called me that."

"Mine too. Is your mama here?"

"She's dead."

"Oh I'm sorry. Who are you here with? Your papa?"

"No, he's dead too."

"Oh dear, I am sorry. Would you like to sit down and keep me company until my husband gets back?"

"Yes thank you."

"Did you have a part in the pageant?"

"No."

"Oh, well, maybe next year. Did you enjoy it?"

"Oh I always enjoy hearing the story of the Baby Jesus, don't you?"

"Yes I do."

Laura's aunt scurried over. She fanned herself with her hand suffering from the heat of all the people in the room, as she sat beside her niece. "Oh Laura dear, weren't the children wonderful? Oh I do wish you could have seen them they were so adorable."

"Well, they certainly sounded adorable Aunt Polly." She smiled at her aunt's vision comment. So like her flustered aunt to speak without thinking, Laura chuckled to herself.

Polly took her hand, "Dear I wish I didn't have to leave you once the holidays are over, but you know if I don't go I could lose my meager pension, such as it is. Not to mention my wonderful little townhouse, I do miss it so, and all my friends of course. Though I am so glad to have been able to share the holidays with you and Nick. He's such a dear."

"Yes he is. Aunt Polly I want you to m..."

"Why aren't you eating Dear? You must keep up your strength." Polly interrupted Laura's introduction, "Is Nick getting you something? You can't just have punch."

"I'm fine Aunt Polly." She patted the older woman's hand assuredly.

"I am sure you will be glad to get rid of me." She patted her round cheeks with a lacy handkerchief..

"Aunt Polly, none of that is important anymore, I am very sorry for the way..."

"Oh now, there, there, no need to apologize Laura dear, you have already done so." Polly squeezed her arm.

"You know Nick and I have set up a bank account for you when you get home, so you don't have to depend on that foolish bit of money the school offers you."

"And I told both you and Nick that..." She shook her head.

"Aunt Polly you can be the most exasperating woman! You are going to take that money or I will never forgive you!"

"And you call me exasperating. Very well, I will take the money, but only if I really and truly need it. Now I am not going to argue with you; I must go and congratulate Audra on the wonderful job she did with the children." Aunt Polly departed as quickly as she came, Laura smiled at her aunt's leave, then remembered her young friend sitting near by.

"Oh I am so sorry, I didn't introduce you to my aunt, that was very rude of me, but she doesn't often leave room to speak sometimes." She chuckled.

"She's a nice lady, she loves you very much."

"You sound like you know her."

"I wish I had someone like her to talk my Papa outta puttin' me in here."

"Your father put you in the orphanage?"

"He figured he couldn't take care of me when Mama died, so he put me here."

"And you said he's dead now?"

"Yes, after he put me in here, he killed himself."

"Oh I'm so sorry! Good Lord."

"Yes He is. He's a Good Lord."

"Silly me, it's a habit I have saying that, I don't know where in the world I got... No, I do know; My mother use to say it all the time. Funny I had forgotten about that habit of hers."

"It's like praying all the time, isn't it?"

"You know, that's what she use to call it, pray without ceasing I think she said."

"Do you pray?"

"Of course I do."

"Why don't you ask Jesus to help you see again?"

"I..ah... I guess I never thought about it. I didn't think I ...Well, I don't what I thought." She said embarrassed by the admission.

"He helped the blind to see. He can help you, ask Him. Here I have something for you, put your hands out."

She did as the girl asked and the child placed a cloth wrapped item in her hand. "Don't be afraid to ask Him Laura."

B

Nick arrived with a plate for his wife and sat beside her. "Now I know you said your not hungry but Pollygirl said ya gotta eat some of this, it's really good. Here." Nick placed a cookie in his wife's hand.

"Would you like one Colleen? Colleen? Where did she go?"

"Where did who go?"

"The little girl who was here."

"I didn't see any little girl."

"I was just speaking to her."

"Listen just what is in that drink I gave ya? I've been over there at the table and been keeping my eye on ya to make sure no one bothers you and I ain't seen no little girl. I saw ya talkin' to Polly, but that's it."

"But she was here Nick. She gave me this." Laura unwrapped the object in her lap, and was surprise when she felt it.

"Well look at that, stolen property." Nick chuckled as he looked at the object in her hand. "Padre Sanchez was all upset 'cause someone stole the Baby Jesus statue right out of the manger. I 'm guessin' this little girl you talked about probably took it."

"Are you sure she isn't around Nick? Look, I think she's a white girl, she had an Irish name."

"An orphan?"

"Yes, she said she was."

"Honey, all the orphans here are either Indians or Spanish, no white kids."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Give me the statute the Padre will be happy to see it back."

"No, she gave it to me."

"Laura?!"

"I'll put it back, just lead me into the church."

"Are you sure you're ready to go in there?"

"I'm ready. Take me in there." He led her into the church that was attached to the main building of the orphanage. Laura cradled the statue of the baby Jesus in her arms. She felt an odd sense of peace and happiness as she held it.

B

The church was decorated with pine garland adorning the walls. Large red ribbons accentuated the decor.

"I can smell the pine. Is it beautiful? Tell me what it looks like Nick."

"Yes, there's these long pine garland all over the walls, and there are all those red Spanish flowers all around, those point things."

"Poinsettias."

"Yeah, that's what their called. They are everywhere, and lots of candles, all lit. Looks really pretty."

"And the manger, where's that?"

"In front of the altar, on a small table."

"Take me to it."

He took her free hand in his, and placing his other arm around her waist. They walked up the aisle to the altar. Laura felt the table with her hand, it grazed the Madonna statute, then found the empty manger. She unwrapped the statute, brought it to her lips for a tender kiss then gently placed it in the manger. She knelt before the nativity, her head bent in prayer. Nick stood quietly behind watching his wife.

She began to weep. Nick moved closer, placing his left hand on her shoulder again. "I knew it was a mistake to let you come here. Come on I'm taking you home now."

She took his hand from her shoulder and kissed it as a tear drop fell, she wiped the errant tear off with her own hand. It was then, when she opened her eyes she saw his rough, sinewy hand. She thought she had just imagined it in her mind's eye as she had so many times before, but no, not this time, this time she saw the shiny gold band she had placed there so lovingly on their wedding day.

"Nick?"

"Let me take you home sweetheart, we don't have to stay for midnight mass..."

"Nick?"

"What Milady?"

She almost didn't want to look up, as she had been afraid it was only a dream, but there it was, her handsome husband's wondrous face. She smiled at the sight of him.

"My knight in shining armor. Was there ever a more glorious sight than you my love?" She rose to her feet and hugged her husband.

"Laura? What's... going on?"

She placed both hands on his face and smiled joyously, "My sweet Nick."

"Laura? You can see?!" She nodded her head quickly as tears spilled from the brilliant sapphire eyes he had come to cherish with all his heart. "Oh my God, MY GOD! It's a blessing, a miracle. Our prayers have been answered!" Nick couldn't contain the excitement in his voice.

"Our prayers have always been answered my love, always."

Epilogue:

A few explanations on Laura and her medical problems. The swollen feet was a telltale sign of Toxemia. During the course of her pregnancy she developed extremely high blood pressure. Thus eventually causing a seizure and temporary blindness. Before the seizure Laura had experienced strange visions, that of seeing half things, like faces. These are called auras which come usually before a seizure. The blindness was due to the high blood pressure and Toxemia, and left her when the disease left, six weeks or so from her miscarriage. Did I do research for that, NO, because similar things happened to me twelve years ago.