Mashed Potatoes Anyone?

By Gail G.

Rating: G

Disclaimer: I do not own the Cartwright characters or any characters from The Ponderosa or Bonanza.

How at my age, do I get myself into so much trouble? Being almost twenty-one, you would think I would know better by now. But, yet again, here I am standing with my two younger brothers, watching our father pace back and forth with clenched fist.

From the look on his face, he is very much trying to decide if he should kill us or not. The mashed potatoes that are stuck in his hair, I am sure, are not helping make the decision any easier.

It’s been some time since I have received a tanning. I am now, however wondering if I am too old or not to receive such a punishment .If that is what my father decides to do, then that is what will be done. Like it or not.

I think it is time to explain how I ended up in this situation. Not that I am alone, I am joined by my two brothers. Eric or Hoss as everyone calls him, my middle brother, stands here as if he has never done anything wrong in his whole life. He is sixteen, and I’m sure that he is also wondering if our misdeeds will lead to a "necessary talk" Then of course, we can’t forget Little Joe who has just turned twelve, he can usually find trouble without our help, today however, it was a group effort. I guess I have no one to blame, it is all of our faults, and it would do us good to just admit to our misdeeds. This is much easier said than done.

It started this morning, when we all got out of bed. It was a lovely morning, the sun was shining and the warmth in the air was a nice change. We hadn’t even gotten dressed yet, when things started to get out of hand. First I was fussing because I had tripped over Hoss’ boots. Then Hoss was complaining that I stayed up too late the night before reading my so called dumb books, and that is why he is so tired. Then Joe started yelling something about our snoring keeping him awake. Even though the truth be known, he was playing with his toy horses under the blanket when the light was still on. The next thing I knew, we were in a shouting match. Yelling at the top of our lungs to see who could be the loudest.

Unfortunately, none of us won the screaming battle. While in the middle of our so-called conversation, we all heard a voice that we did not dare try to overtake. "WOULD YOU LIKE TO TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?!" our father bellowed above our shouts. We all instantly stopped and turned to look at our somewhat angry father. We each took a quick glance at each other, and I noticed I was once again elected the spokesperson. "Nothing pa, everything is fine." Pa grunted and turned to go back into the kitchen to retrieve a much needed cup of coffee. Finally, he informed us to hurry up and get dressed so we could eat our breakfast while it was still hot.

When we were all seated at the breakfast table, pa started to give us some orders for the day. I was informed that I was to help him dig some new fence post in the north pasture. This is a job I detested, only because of the torrential rains that we have had recently. By the time we finished this afternoon, we would be covered head to toe with mud. I moaned lowly, I didn’t think anyone had heard me. But Hoss had a devilish grin on his face. I do believe that he thought it was quite funny that I was going to be doing such an unpleasant job. However, his smile disappeared when pa informed him that he and Little Joe would be cleaning the barn from top to bottom.

It was my turn to smile an evil grin. But Hoss took it the wrong way and started yelling that it wasn’t fair that I received all the easy jobs. The next thing I knew I was standing shouting back, that if he thought digging fence post was easy, he was crazy. This exchange did not last very long. Pa stood up and informed us both that if he heard one more word about it, we would both be having an experience that neither of us would like. We decided to back down, and started to eat in silence. Breakfast was much quieter after that.

My father and I finished our breakfast and went to saddle our horses. Hoss and Joe, went to start on the regular chores that needed to be done. Pa and I were getting ready to leave on our way, when a buggy pulled into the yard. It was Mrs. Greene and her daughter Tess. They own a ranch not too far from the Ponderosa. Hoss, really likes Tess a lot, however, when she is with both of us she can never decide who she likes the best. This situation has led to more than one argument in the past. I really only see Tess as a pest. She is always trying to play some kind of game with our emotions and I do not like it one bit.

After they had gotten down from the buggy, pa went over to greet them. "What brings you out this way, so early in the morning?" Pa asked Mrs. Greene as he tipped his hat. Mrs. Greene began to explain that a skunk had found its way into their house and they only had enough time to retrieve a few items. Some of her hands stayed behind to try and air out the smell. She stated that she simply did not know where to go, so they got into the buggy and drove to our house. Pa extended an invitation to both the women and told them they were welcome to stay on the Ponderosa. Mrs. Greene informed my father that she and Tess would be staying in town, but she did appreciate the offer. Pa then invited both her and her daughter to our house for dinner. She accepted the invitation and said they would arrive at six o’clock.

They then loaded into the buggy and with a slap of the reins, they were on their way to town. This problem with Tess would serve as part of the problem for the bad behavior later in the evening. After Mrs. Greene and Tess had left, I went into the house to retrieve my gloves. Pa was waiting for me, so that we could get started for the day. When I entered the house Hoss accused me of flirting with Tess. I tried to explain that I had done no such thing, since I hadn’t even said one word to either her or her mother. I tried to walk away, but Hoss grabbed the back of my jacket. The next thing I knew I was lying flat on my back, staring up into Hoss’ face.

I jumped to my feet, and informed my middle brother that I did not have time for his foolishness. Pa was waiting for me and I am sure his patience was becoming thin. Do you think Hoss would let it go? Oh no, he started yelling that I was always trying to steal his girl. His girl, when did Tess become his girl? Not that I want to court her, but I hate being accused of something that is not true.

The next thing I knew we were in another shouting match. Little Joe stood by the fireplace with his mouth hanging open. And Hop Sing just shook his head. I guess pa could hear us all the way outside, because the next thing I knew, he was standing in the doorway. His face had a stern look and his hands were on his hips. This was not a good sign, not a good sign at all. When we finally realized he was there, we both attempted to act as if nothing was happening. How stupid is that, he could hear us yelling outside. "Would someone like to explain What is going on?" pa’s voice was low and even. "Oh nothin pa, Adam here just tripped. Didn’t ya Adam?" Hoss answered while looking at the tip of his boots. "Yeah pa no big deal, everything is fine." There was no way I was going to go into what we were really arguing about. Pa’s mood was already sour, because of our earlier bickering.

Even though I think pa knew I was lying about everything being ok. He just let it go, well this time anyways. I don’t think he had the patience at the moment to listen to some drawn out story.

"Good, then lets get going. Oh, Joseph, Erik, your chores had best be done by the time we return. Do I make myself clear.?" pa was looking directly into Hoss’ face.

"Yes sir". They both answered at the same time. Pa had called Hoss by his given name, and this did not go unnoticed. This basically meant that what he ask had better be done or else there would be consequences. Both pa and I went to mount up and headed for the fences that needed to be mended.

When we arrived to our designated spot, we went straight to work. The silence was slightly eerie and pa keep looking at me from the bottom of his eyes. For some reason when he does this I feel as if I am ten years old again. "Would you like to tell me about?" pa asked while holding up a fence rail. "No, not really pa." I answered quickly. "You know that I’ll not have you and your brother fighting, so what ever is going on between the two of you needs to be settled soon." pa now had that stern no nonsense look on his face. I just nodded and continued working. I would need to make sure that Hoss and I got the misunderstanding straightened out tonight. I fear that if we let our attitudes go on much longer, that we will both be receiving an attitude adjustment. Personally, this is something I believe we both can live without for the rest of our lives.

Later that afternoon we headed for home. I was correct in the assumption that we would be covered with mud. All I wanted to do was take a nice long bath and eat a hot meal. When we rode into the yard, Hoss and Joe were stacking the last of the firewood that had been cut. Joe ran over to us letting us know that all the chores had been completed. Smart move on their part. He then asked when Mrs. Greene and Tess would be arriving for dinner. I had forgotten about them coming until Joe mentioned it. I let out a low moan, that did not go unnoticed by my father. He turned and gave me a stern look. "I expect everyone to be on their best behavior tonight." Pa said, not really speaking to anyone in particular. I managed to mutter a yes sir and then excused myself so I could get my bath taken. I went into the house, and Hop Sing already had hot water waiting for me. I slide out of my mud crusted clothes and slipped gingerly into the warm water. I rested my head on the back of the copper tub, my eyes closed, trying to enjoy the silence. Even in the house with the door closed I could hear my father and Little Joe having a heated interchange about wether or not Joe would be taking a bath. I am sure I know who will be winning the argument. I heard pa call to me from outside the front door. "Adam, you are not the only one that needs to take a bath. Get a move on son." "Ok, pa I am getting out right know." I answered back as I lifted my weary body out of the tub. I would have rather just went to bed, but with company coming I had no choice but to get ready. After I had finally had gotten dressed I headed outside. Hop Sing had already emptied the tub and had begin to refill it. When I stepped into the front yard, Pa and Joe were yet again having a discussion as to wether Joe was going to have a bath. If Joe had been smart he would have let the subject drop long before now.

The next thing I heard was a loud POP and Joe yelling a plaintive yelp. Joe then turned and hightailed it into the house to take his bath. After Joe, Hoss, and Pa had their baths, I set the table with our good china and we waited for Mrs. Greene and Tess to show up. About a half hour later we heard a buggy pull into the yard. We all went out to greet the ladies. Hoss took care of the horses, while Pa and I escorted the ladies into the house.

This was yet again an error on my part. Even though at the time I did not realize it. When Hoss had finished taking care of the horses he stomped into the house. Pa looked up at him with a frown. What could be bothering Hoss?? I keep asking the question over and over to myself. Mrs. Greene and Pa sat on the settee and was having a conversation about what she had done in town that day. Joe and I had started to play a game of checkers and Hoss and Tess was looking at a new catalog that Tess had brought with her. She had wanted to show Hoss the new style of dresses that the women were wearing in the big city. I think however, Tess could wear a burlap sack and Hoss would care less.

At six o’clock sharp, Hop Sing let us know that supper was ready. We all washed our hands and then stood by our chairs until the ladies were ready to be seated. Pa pulled out Mrs. Greene’s chair and I did the same for Tess. Hoss gave me a angry look when Pa was not looking. I don’t think it helped matters that Tess had seated herself next to me. Hoss would never believe I had nothing to do with that. Pa, started passing the dishes of food around the table. When Joe only put one small piece of steak on his plate, pa gave him a stern look and said, "Joseph, I don’t believe it will kill you to eat a vegetable." Then he passed the dishes back down to Little Joe’s end of the table and made him get a spoonful of each item. Joe was going to protest, but decided against it when he noticed Pa was still frowning at him.

Now, I know what your thinking, how could such a simple nice dinner end with our father wearing mashed potatoes. Well, let me tell you, it all started with a simple remark Tess made. She made a comment on what a gentleman I was by escorting her into the house, while Hoss took care of the horses. Hoss’ eyes got real big and he yelled, "Ya don’t think I can be a gentleman caus I took care of the horses?" Now we all know that’s not what she meant, but he wasn’t going to listen to it. He then turned on me and started to accuse me of trying to steal his girl from him. Again I ask when did Tess become Hoss’ girl??

All I know was that my anger was coming full fledge. I had just about enough of Hoss’ nasty attitude today and was not going to take another minute of it. I had my mouth open to protest, but Pa cut me short. "Enough, both of you. Your embarrassing our guest." Pa’s voice rang throughout the house. Mrs. Greene’s eyes were wide and her face slightly flushed. Tess on the other hand seem to be enjoying the fact that we were bickering over her.

You would have thought that Pa’s warning would have stopped what I did next. I’m just not sure what came over me. I really guess I wasn’t thinking at all.. I scooped my spoon into my mashed potatoes and flung the steaming hot mess right at Hoss. The potatoes smacked him right in the middle of the forehead. Pa was getting ready to stand up to protest, but before we knew it Hoss retaliated. Only Hoss slung carrots, and I saw it coming so I dunked and the spoonful of carrots flew past my head and hit the wall. The carrots slowly slid down the wall leaving an orange trail behind. Well that’s all it took, the next thing I knew food was flying from every direction. Even though Mrs. Greene and Tess were screaming and Pa was shaking with fury we did not stop. After a couple of throws Joe had joined into the war. He really wasn’t taking sides, he just figured he might not ever be able to join into a food fight again.

I was partly unaware of what was happening, I keep dunking so as not to be hit by flying food. The next thing I knew I heard a crack. When this happen I heard Joe yell "OW." Then I heard another crack, this time it was Hoss. Though instead of yelling "OW" he yelped "PA!" in disbelief. You would have thought this would have caught my attention a bit sooner, but NO, I just wanted revenge and that was what I intended to get. I continued to throw food missiles not really caring who I hit. Finally I heard one more crack. But this time was different, not only was I hearing the cracking sound, I was feeling the cracking sound. A sting only to familiar came into my backside. I whirled around to see who had whacked me, only to find my father standing there with one of Hop Sings wooden spoons in his hand. I quickly lowered the handful of food that I was getting ready to throw at the culprit. I did not see it in my best of interest to follow through with what I had intended to do. I was also quite embarrassed at the fact that Pa had whacked me and my brothers in front of Mrs. Greene and Tess. I could tell my face was turning a bright red for I could feel the heat rising into it.

"WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS THIS ALL ABOUT," my father yelled standing much to close to me for comfort. I started to speak when I realized Tess was crying and Mrs. Greene was trying to console

her. Mrs. Greene’s voice broke the silence. "Ben I think we should be getting home." "Maggie you don’t have to leave." pa said while giving a meaningful glare at us. "Ben, Tess is much to upset, I’m not sure what this is all about, but I think you need some time to find out. And just look at Tess’ new dress. It’s ruined" Mrs. Greene started brushing some of the carrots from Tess’ dress. But the more she wiped the more the orange stains became apparent. "Maggie, the boys will pay for the dress. And don’t you worry I will find out what is going. Even though I don’t think the boys will like it when I do." pa had now crossed his arms and had that "look" on his face that we all dreaded. The "look" is that kind of look that it does not matter how old you are or who started the fight. You were going to be in trouble no matter what.

Pa then ushered Mrs. Greene and Tess out the front door. "Don’t you three move, until I get back. Do you understand me?"

The three of us answered in unison, "Yes sir." Pa then disappeared out the door, with an angry Mrs. Greene and a crying Tess walking in front of him.

"Do you think were in trouble Adam?" Joe asked while fidgeting with the table clothe. Did I think we were in trouble, Oh yeah, I didn’t think we were in trouble, I knew. "What do you think Joe?" I answered back giving him a dark look. "That’s what I thought." Joe said while hanging his head. Hoss did not say a word, he just stood there like he always does. We could hear pa speaking to Mrs. Greene outside. I could not hear exactly what was being said, but I was for sure it was not good.

Finally after a few minutes, we all heard the Greene’s buggy pull away. That’s when we all started to get really nervous. In a minute we would all have to face pa, and I was pretty sure this was not going to be a pleasant experience in the least.   

We listened for his footsteps, when we heard him walk across the porch, we all quickly straightened up. We knew what was coming, or at least we thought that we did. Suddenly the door swung open and pa was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed and his eyebrows close together. He stepped into the house and ordered us to stand in a straight line.

This is when I noticed that pa had been one of the victims of our misbehavior. It had not even accrued to me that pa had been hit by any of the flying food. He had carrot stains on his good vest, mashed potatoes in his hair, and there was a small piece of meat that was slightly balanced on his shoulder. I almost grinned, but then remembered why I was standing here in the first place.

So this is where we were when I first began to explain this story. The three of us standing in a straight line with pa pacing in front of us, with clenched fist. So far he has not said a word, but I can tell he is getting ready to explode. "THE THREE OF YOU, WILL GET THIS MESSED CLEANED UP, NOW!! I’m going for a ride. We will discuss this further when I return and no doubt it will not be pleasant." pa then turned and left the house, slamming the door behind him.

I haven’t seen pa this mad for along time. He was so upset that he was unable to discuss what had happened. He had decided to take a ride to cool off, and the three of us were grateful.

We then looked around at the task before us. There is food everywhere and I mean everywhere. It’s stuck to the walls, the floor, the windows, and it is even on the ceiling. Boy this is gonna take all night. Hop Sing come over with some buckets and cleaning clothes. "Chop, chop, boys better get busy, if you want to get mess cleaned up tonight." "Aren’t ya gonna help us Hop Sing?" Little Joe asked with a puzzled look on his face. "No, Hop Sing no help. I did not make mess I not clean up. Boys better get busy." Hop Sing then turned on his heals and left the room for us to get started.

We didn’t even really know where to begin, the mess was so bad. I finally decided to take charge, we couldn’t just stand here all night. I have a feeling that pa would not be pleased if he came back to find that we have not even started cleaning.

"Hoss, you go get the ladder and start on the ceiling, Little Joe, you start wiping the windows, and I will start cleaning off the table. After the ceiling and windows are done, we can work together getting the walls clean. And last should be the floors." I gave orders as if I were a Sargent in charge of a small army.

"Ya ain’t given me no orders Adam." Hoss started to protest, "This is all your fault anyways. If ya would quit tryin to steal Tess away from me then this would have never happen."

"Hoss are you insane? I don’t even like Tess! Why do you persist on thinking that I want to sweep her off her feet?" I was now glaring at my middle brother. "Well, you’re always tryin to get her attention by flirtin with her." Hoss’ temper was now rising slightly.

"Hoss will you use your brain. What exactly did I do to flirt with Tess!"

Hoss stood trying to think, "Well ya walked her into the house, and left me to take care of the horses."

"I did not really want to walk Tess into the house. It was the polite thing to do, what do you think pa would say if I were rude to her?" I now too had a strained expression on my face.

After Hoss thought about it for a minute, it occurred to him that Tess was the one always talking to me first. She also was the one who chose to sit by me at dinner. "Your right Adam, I just didn’t see it at first. Tess only wants to be with me when its convenient for her. And now that I think about it your really not the one who talks to her first. She is always the one speakin first. Ya know Adam I don’t think I like this game Tess is playin with us. And she seemed to like us fighin over her."

Bingo, he had finally, after all this time figured it out. It’s about time. "I guess she really ain’t my girl Adam. I just thought that she was." Hoss said this with true inspiration in his eyes. "Well Adam, Joe, we best be gettin this mess cleaned up before pa gets home. And what are we goin to tell him."

"Enough, we will tell him just enough to hopefully save our hides. Even though I feel this is very unlikely. Pa is really mad at what we have done. It made if even worse that we had guest." I then started to clear the table, while Hoss went to the barn to retrieve the ladder.

When Hoss came back into the house, we went straight to work. Trying to hurry to finish all the clean up that needed to be done before pa returned. I was more afraid of what pa was going to do to us than what he would say. Even at my age, the thought of spanking made me shake. Not only that I think I would be embarrassed by such a punishment.

It was late when we finally finished and pa had yet to come back to the house. At first we were starting to get a little worried. But then we decided that pa had been real mad and he must have needed some time to cool off before he returned. I guess he needed a lot of time to cool off. We did not know if we should go to bed or not. So for awhile we sat by the fire and discussed what had happened today. Hoss and I both felt a little foolish about getting in an argument over Tess. Well it really wasn’t all about Tess, it was a combination of things.

About an hour later we decided to go to bed. The three of us slowly walked into the bunk room and slid out of our food covered clothes. We had forgotten to change after we had cleaned the mess up. I suppose we were to tired. We then each washed our faces and picked out as much food from our hair as we could. We would all need baths tomorrow. I don’t think Little Joe will be too pleased to hear about having to take another bath in a two day time span. It had been hard enough to get him to take a bath for to nights guest.

I had been lying in bed quite some time, when I heard a horse come into the yard. I got up and peeked out the window. I could tell from the moonlight that it was pa. He slowly unmounted his horse and led him into the barn. Pa stayed in the barn for along time. I’m sure he was taking good care of his horse. After what seemed like forever, pa emerged from the barn and walked toward the house. I felt like a kid again and ran and jumped into the bed.

Would he wake us tonight to deal with this situation? Would he wait till morning? What type of punishment would he give the three of us? These questions and many others raced through my mind. When the front door opened I shut my eyes and pretended that I was asleep. This is something I have not done since I was Joe’s age. Pa opened our bedroom door slowly and creep across the room. I opened one eye slightly to see what he was doing. First, he went and checked on little Joe. He pulled Joe’s covers up to his chin and then kissed him lightly on his forehead. He then turned his attention to Hoss. He straightened Hoss’ blanket and removed half a sandwich from his bed. He then reached up and also kissed Hoss on his forehead. I wondered if pa did this every night. He then turned to me and I quickly closed my eye. He tucked my blanket around me tight and believe it or not kissed me on my forehead. I almost said something, but decided against it. I might as well enjoy this act of love while I can.

How can a father that is so loving and caring for his three sons, became a tyrant when he hands out a punishment. I guess it is his love for us that helps him . For if there were no consequences for our actions then I suppose we would not grow up to be the men he wanted us to be. Honest, loyal, law abiding men, who will think of others and do the right things. I suppose being out of control for awhile would be fun. But what would our lives be like if no one cared.

The next thing I remember is dreaming of giant carrots and evil mashed potatoes. Do you suppose it had anything to do with the events from the day before?

Morning came to soon. It felt as if I had just closed my eyes when I heard my named being called. "Adam, Hoss, Joseph its time to get out of bed, NOW!" I slowly turned over and threw my legs over the side of my bunk. Joe sat up rubbing his eyes while Hoss jumped off the top bunk and started to get dressed. Yesterdays events suddenly flooded back into our minds. "What do ya think pa’s goin to do to us?" Joe asked while pulling on his pants. "We’ll soon find out." I answered back with a frown on my face.

After we were dressed we all filed into the main room. Pa instructed us to sit down and eat our breakfast. However, pa warned if one person threw anything we would live to regret it. Believe me, we have no intention of ever throwing any food at anyone ever again. When we finished eating our meal, pa sent each of us to take a quick bath and then we were to do our chores.

We found it strange that he had yet mentioned our activities from the day before. What was pa waiting for. The anticipation was eating at all three of us. What punishment could be worse than waiting. Maybe he wasn’t going to say anything. Even though I knew this was not going to happen, I could at least wish. Pa has never let a misdeed go without some kind of punishment. He must be taking his time so he can be creative. Or maybe he just doesn’t know what to do with us. Well what ever it is, we were each having a private breakdown waiting for the inevitable.

Later that afternoon, after all the chores had been completed and we had eaten lunch. Hoss, Little Joe and I had gathered in the living area to relax. I was reading one of my books. While Hoss and Joe played a game of checkers. Pa was still outside working on shining his saddle.

When we heard the door open, we all turned around to see who it was. Of course it was pa, he had his hands on his hips and his mouth was a straight line. We recognized the signs, judgement time had finally arrived. He walked over to where we were all sitting and stood before us like a grizzly bear.

"STAND UP, all three of you." Pa shouted in a deep gruff voice. We all glanced at each other and stood as fast as we could.

"I must say I am disappointed in the three of you and your actions of yesterday. I thought you Adam and you Hoss, had out grown such behavior. But apparently I have misjudged the two of you." pa was pointing his finger at Hoss and I.

I was about to speak up to defend myself, however, pa threw up his right hand to let me know interruptions were not allowed. He then continued what he was saying, "What ever the trouble is between the two of you had best be settled, for I will not tolerate such actions as of yesterday again. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?" Hoss and I both answered like chirping birds, "Yes sir, pa sir." "As for Joseph, I believe he was just following the example of his two older brothers. So I don’t feel his punishment should be as severe." pa had now turned to face Little Joe. "You young man, are restricted to the ranch for two days. You will also have extra chores to do during this time to help pay for a new dress for Tess. Also you will be joining your brothers in apologizing to Tess and Mrs. Greene. Do you have any questions as to why you are being punished." Joe looked very relieved, this was not the punishment he had expected at all. "No sir, I aint’ got no questions, I understand completely."

"Joseph, this is your one and only warning. If you ever act like you did last night in front of company again, you won’t sit for a month. I hope I am very clear on this subject." pa was waving his finger under Joe’s nose. "Don’t worry pa, I understand sir." Little Joe answered while watching pa’s finger go back and forth.

Pa then told Joe that he was dismissed and could go start his evening chores. He was very happy to be leaving the scene that was unfolding before him. Even though Joe’s punishment was light, I did not think we would be getting off so easy.

In a flash Pa was standing in front of Hoss, "You young man, didn’t actually start the food fight, but your bad attitude lately, I do believe provoked Adams action. I am assuming this had something to do with Tess. But I really just don’t want to hear about. You, Erik Cartwright are restricted to the ranch for one week. You will also be doing extra chores during that time, to help pay for a new dress for Tess. And of corse you will be apologizing. And your warning is the same as Joseph’s. If you are going to act like a child, then I will make sure I treat you like one the next time. Do you understand."

Hoss also had a relieved look on his face, "Yes sir, pa, I understand. I won’t ever do nothin so stupid again."

"I should hope not. Your are excused, you may go help Joseph with the evening chores." Pa had motioned to the door. Hoss turned and practically ran out of the house. I think he would have if pa had not been standing right there.

So here I am now all along with Pa. He has turned to face me and is glaring at me from the top of his eyes. "I guess this only leaves you, young man." he spoke in a acid tone, "Do you have anything to say for yourself, before I pass punishment?"

I looked straight into pa’s eyes and then quickly looked away. Why is it he can make me feel like I am six years old again. "Pa all I can say is I’m sorry. I really mean it too, I am truly sorry. It was such a stupid kid thing to do. And it’s all my fault, I could have just asked to be excused, so that I could have cooled down some."

"Adam, look at me." I slowly brought my eyes up to meet his. "I want you to remember that your brothers look up to you. You are responsible for setting an example for both of them and you know it.. You are right about one thing, slinging mashed potatoes at Hoss was a childish thing to do. Even if you were angry, you know better. Because, you behaved in such a manner your brothers followed your example. Adam, I have thought long and hard about your punishment and I think I came up with the perfect one. To begin with you are restricted to the ranch for two weeks, you will also have extra chores to do to help pay for Tess’ dress. And of corse you will apologize. But on top of that for the next month you will live by the same rules that Joe does. Do you understand"

At first I did not understand at all. What’s he mean by Joe’s rules? I am sure I had a puzzled look on may face, "Pa I don’t understand, what rules?"

Pa begin to explain, "since you acted like a child, I have decided you will be treated like one for a month. You will not do anything without permission from me first. Joe is not allowed to go into town by himself, so you will not be allowed to go into town by yourself. Joe can’t visit his friends without consulting with me first, so the same now applies to you. Also I will be riding to the Greene ranch with the three of you. Joseph would not be allowed to go and apologize without me being with him, so again the same applies to you. And one more thing. During the month that you live by Joe’s rules you will also be subjected to the same type of punishments that he would receive, should he break any of the rules. Do you understand know?"

Oh, yeah I understood. Since I acted like a child pa was going to make sure to treat me as such. I raised my head, eyes wide open and answered pa with a quick, "Yes sir, I understand." Even though I was only actually restricted for two weeks, my punishment would continue for a month. Not being allowed to go and do what I want on my own time, was in my opinion the worse possible punishment that could be given. And then to find that if I break the rules I would receive whatever punishment that Joe would normally receive. Well that was a low blow, only because ninety nine percent of the time, Joe received spankings as his correction. Would I be willing to break a rule, knowing that my punishment would be a spanking.

Gee, and I thought I was too old for that. I guess I was wrong again.

Pa then excused me so that I could help with the rest of the chores. When I arrived in the barn, Hoss and Joe were about to die to hear what happened. I explained to them what pa had said about having to follow the same rules as Joe. Joe laughed until he was rolling in the lose hay on the barn floor. "It ain’t as easy to follow all them rules as you think it is. Good Luck big brother."

I assured him that I was planning on following every rule to the letter. I have no intention of receiving a spanking at my age.

The next morning, we all rode out to the Greene’s ranch so that we could apologize to Mrs. Greene and Tess. Pa keep his word and came along with us on our trip. It was most embarrassing when he made me stand beside him when I apologized. He of corse had done the same with Joe. Mrs. Greene and Tess accepted all of our apologize with grace. Pa then paid her the price for Tess’ ruined dress. Of course we all knew we would be working off every single cent.

Pa asked Mrs. Greene if she would like to try and join us for dinner again. She rather quickly declined, which almost made pa giggle.

The four of us then went and mounted our horses to head home. As we rode toward the Ponderosa all I could think about was how long this month was going to be. And I wondered how many of Joe’s rules I would break and if Pa would follow through with his promised punishment.

Would pa follow through, of corse he would, what was I thinking. I came to learn the truth to this just a few weeks later. It was my third week into my punishment and even though my restriction was over I was still living by Little Joe rules. One day Joe and I had finished all our chores and were moping around the house. Pa and Hoss were out somewhere checking the cattle. Little Joe suggested that we go fishing. I thought it was a grand idea. And we gathered our fishing gear, and headed for the lake. Did it even occur to me that Joe was not allowed to go to the lake by himself or that he needed permission from pa to go fishing. Nooo, I was still thinking on big brother terms and did not see anything wrong with what we were doing. We spent a lovely afternoon by the lake, basking in the warm sun and catching enough fish for supper.

After we had caught enough fish, we headed for home. When we rode into the yard, pa was standing on the porch with his hands on his hips and a dark scowl on his face. My first thought was I wonder what’s bothering pa? I would find out soon enough. We jumped off the back of our horses and led them into the barn. As we were rubbing the horses down, pa came in. "Where have the two of you been?" he asked in a harsh tone. Joe answered quickly, "We went fishin pa." And he preceded to hand our father the fish we had caught. I was still wondering what pa was mad about. It finally occurred to me when he spoke his next sentence. "Who, gave you two permission to leave the Ponderosa. And since when were you allowed to go to the lake without Adult supervision?" I was about to say I was an adult, but then I remembered that I was still following the Joe’s rules punishment. Ohhh, now I know why he is mad. Not only was Joe not suppose to leave, neither was I. Uh oh, I really wasn’t thinking of that when I had decided it would be okay to go fishing. "Joseph, did I not just warn you last week what would happened if you wondered off again, without permission?" Pa’s eyebrows were drawn close together and if looks could kill I think we would both be dead.

Joe thought for the moment, "Yes sir you did." Pa began to speak again, "And what is the rule about going down to the lake?" "I’m not allowed to without an adult, and if I do I get a spanking," Joe answered in a low soft voice. I was having my own silent dilemma, if Joe’s punishment was to be a spanking. Then my punishment would be the same. So much for not getting a licking at my age. Pa crooked his finger to have Joe come stand in front of him. He then slid off his thick leather belt. He had Joe turn and bend slightly over and he applied six swift licks to Joe’s backside. Little Joe began to cry and when pa was finished, Joe started to rub his bottom. "You may spend the rest of the day in your room after your chores are complete. You do understand why you were punished?" Pa was now hugging the weeping child.

"Yes pa, because I’m not allowed to wonder off or go to the lake by myself. Cause, I could get hurt and no one would know where I am." Joe was wiping his nose on his shirt sleeve. "You go on into the house then, I need to speak to your brother." Pa let go of my brother and Joe slowly drug himself into the house.

When we heard the front door close. Pa then turned his attention to me. "Did you forget that you are suppose to be living by your brothers rules?" "Well, ummm, no pa I didn’t forget. I just didn’t think going fishing was such a big deal." I was now chewing on my bottom lip. "When you act like a child, you are treated like one. I seem to remember explaining this to you at the beginning of your punishment. If you broke the rules, that you would receive the same consequences as your brother. Did I or did I not tell you this." Pa’s face had a deep scowl and his right hand was swinging back and forth with that belt in it.

"Yes sir, you did tell me that." I answered hoping he would change his mind. Only he hadn’t changed his mind. He motioned for me to come stand in front of him. Just like he had done with Little Joe. When I made it over to him, he had me bend over slightly. He then applied six swift licks to the seat of my pants. Unlike Joe I did not start to cry. But on the last lick, I think pa threw some extra strength into it. I heard myself holler out, "Yeouch." I then felt my face flush slightly. Not just because of my age, but because it hurt. He then said the same things to me that he had told Joseph. I too was to stay in our room for the rest of the day. I walked back to the house rubbing my stinging behind. I went into the bunk room and laid face down on my bed. How on earth did I get myself into the mess. I then remembered that all of this came about because of some MASHED POTATOES. Mashed potatoes mind you, had caused all of this mess. Boy had I been stupid. I decided at that very moment that mashed potatoes were now my least favorite food and I never ever even want to see mashed potatoes again.

The end