Things Never Change

Written by Rose A. Schrock

Rated: G

Disclaimer: The characters in this story from the PAX TV series The Ponderosa do not belong to this author. It was written for the enjoyment of fans only. So please don’t sue me! J

The evening was brilliant with the rainbow colors of a setting sun. Little Joe was running through the trees of the forest alone when he heard a man’s deep voice call his name. The voice grew louder as the boy ran in the direction of the sound.

"I’m here! I’m coming!"

Little Joe almost colided with Carlos as the older man skidded to a stop at the sight of him. He was carrying a long rifle and had a huge grin on his face.

"Did you come to find me, Carlos? I was just out playing. What are you doing with that rifle?" Joe’s words blurred together as he reached for his friend’s weapon. Ben Cartwright had never allowed Joe to even look at a gun, but Carlos always seemed to understand his boyish curiousity and let him fire it when Ben was not around.

"I have been out hunting, Little Joe."

Joe smiled at the strange way the Mexican had of pronouncing his name.

"Did you have any luck, Carlos?"

"Unfortunately not, Little Joe. But perhaps we can find a deer now together before it grows too dark."

"But," Little Joe looked over his shoulder as if he were aware of his father’s presense.. "What will Pa say?"

"We do not have to tell him." Mischif gleamed in the Mexican’s hazel eyes. "That is, until we have killed a great buck. Then we will want to show it off and brag about our thrilling adventures."

Little Joe’s laugh rang out and mingled with Carlos’ own laughter as the two set out on the hunt.

"You know what, Carlos?" Joe’s question broke the comfortable silence they had shared for many minutes. "Sometimes I think that I like you better than Adam or Hoss."

Carlos stopped short, shock changing the features of his face.

"Do not ever say that, Little Joe!" Carlos ordered sharply, his concern very evident. "Do not ever say such a terrible thing."

"I’m sorry, Carlos." Joe took a step back in surprise at the glare he was recieving.

Carlos sighed and knelt down in front of Joe, meeting him eye to eye.

"I do not mean to be so harsh with you, Little Joe. It is only that I do not want anything to ever stop the love you must have for your brothers. It is something that you will see some day." Carlos’ stood up and resumed walking. "I love my sister Isabella more than anything I know." His voice broke, a rare thing for the rough man. "She is my heart. I would die for her."

Carlos turned to study the boy.

"You do not see now. But someday you will understand. Someday your brothers will be in your heart. But you must give them the chance. You must let them in, Little Joe."

"Carlos?" Joe whispered timidly, embarassed by the soft side of his friend.

"Yes, Little Joe?"

"I think I know what you mean." Tears stung Joe’s eyes but he did nott try to hide them. For some reason they did not seem so silly now. "About bein’ in my heart and all. I know that my ma’s with me even if she’s livin’ in heaven. She promised me that she would always be in my heart. That’s what Pa told me."

Carlos looked off into the darkening horizen before meeting Joe’s eyes. Joe was startled to see a small tear in the corner of the Mexican’s eyes. Slowly it traveled down his cheek before it disappeared.

"That is a beautiful thing, Little Joe. Do not ever let anyone take that away from you." His voice dropped lower. "I am ashamed to say that I had forgotten I promise I made to my own mother. She was a woman of grace and mercy. I promised her to remain faithful to my heart and remember her always, but I had forgotten."

He smiled.

"Thank you, Little Joe. Thank you for reminding me."

"Look Carlos! Look!" Joe jumped and pointed frantically at the large buck standing within an easy gun shot from them. Its dark chocolete eyes bored into Little Joe but the deer did not move an inch.

"Quick! Shoot him, Joe!" Carlos’ face tensed as he watched the boy grip the gun.

The trigger finger wavered.

"I can’t do it, Carlos!" Joe flung the weapon on the ground, furious at his own weakness. The deer eyed him warily but still refused to budge an inch. "I couldn’t do it last time we went hunting either! I’ll never be a man!"

"Pick it up, Little Joe." Carlos’ words were like a stubborn immovable rock. "Pick up the gun and shoot the buck. It is a lesson you must learn now."

Joe reached for the rifle and again pointed it at the deer.

"See the buck waiting?" Carlos breathed. "He knows it is his destiny."

Joe wanted to scream. He wanted to throw the rifle at Carlos and tell him to shoot the animal himself. Instead he closed his eyes to avoid looking into the buck’s accusingly sad gaze and pulled the trigger.

The deer fell without a sound and Joe began to cry. Carlos silently began to walk away toward the sunset.

"Carlos!" Joe screamed between sobs. "Carlos, where are you going? I killed the deer! Carlos!"

Carlos’ eyes seemed to see deep inside Joe’s soul, and for an eery moment those eyes looked exactly like the dead buck’s own.

"Now you have killed. You killed because you had to to survive. It will not be the last time, Little Joe. But I want you to remember the cost that the killing will be. It will tear away at your spirit until there is nothing left. Until your heart is only an empty space." He pointed at the now night sky to prove his point. "An empty space like this sky."

Carlos’ voice began to fade as he walked away.

"I’m scared, Carlos! Don’t leave me!" Joe wailed.

"Some things change but some are the same forever. Killing is the same and the love you have for your family. Never forget to let the love cover the bitterness."

Carlos was fading.

"Carlos! Carlos! Why did you leave?" Joe was hysterical by now. "Carlos!"

That is when he saw it. The deer that he has killed was running swiftly. It was running on the night air and seemed to be leaping toward the hill where Carlos was traveling, its hazel eyes full of strength and purpose. The deer rubbed its head against Carlos and the two looked at Joe one last time; two matching sets of wounded eyes. Carlos placed a hand on top of the animal’s head and the pair crossed the hill silently. They flowed together like a melody.

"Carlos!" Joe covered his eyes. "Carl—"

"Hush up, Little Brother." Joe jumped up at the sound of his oldest brother, Adam. "We’re trying to sleep here."

"Where’s Carlos?" Joe jumped out of bed, looking wildly in every direction.

Hoss and Adam exchanged a knowing look.

"Carlos is gone, Joe." Hoss reminded gently. "Don’t you remember, Brother? We had his funeral yesterday." Compassion and sympathy filled his eyes. "You must have been dreamin’ is all."

"Go back to sleep, Little Joe." Adam told his brother. "We all miss Carlos."

Joe climbed back into bed and closed his eyes as two tears wet his pillow for the man he had lost. The friend that had become another older brother to him.

"Goodnight, Little Joe."

"Goodnight, Adam." Joe could already hear Hoss snoring again.

"And Adam…"

"What is it, Brother?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Little Joe."

Joe turned over and began to drift off again to sleep. In his dream he was on a horse. He was riding through a meadow. And beside of him rode Carlos. The two smiled at each other before riding off into the sunlight. And Little Joe felt it in his heart. He would always love his brothers. But the bond he shared with Carlos was special. Some things would never change.