Spiked Spike
by Scorpio

Julie grinned across the room at the *hot* looking blonde wearing the 
long black leather duster and the creepy bite-me-now vampire mask. He 
had realistic looking fangs and those cool colored contacts to make 
his eyes all yellowish. The very idea that he had enough money to 
throw away *that* kind of cash on a *party costume* made her hormones 
_sing_ with lust. 

She would do her mother proud and snag that walking wallet for 
herself. If growing up as the poor family in a humble and crumbling 
neighborhood had taught her anything, it was to (a) keep the grades 
at scholarship levels and (b) marry into *money* as soon as possible. 

A half formed plan beginning to stir in her head, she dipped out an 
extra cup of the fruity punch, splashed a touch of vodka in it to 
hide the taste of the white powder she had on her. Julie pulled out a 
small plastic vial and sprinkled some Fantasy in liberally. Once he 
was out of his mind high, she'd easily get him in her bed and then 
she'd have him by the short and curlies.

Walking over to him, Julie smiled coyly and carefully offered him up 
the cup of red liquid.

"Hey you. Here, have some punch. It's good, but it has a bit of a 
kick. There's some vodka in it."

She winked at him and he winked back with those bright gold contacts. 
Vaguely, she wondered what color his eyes *really* were, but then he 
grasped the glass and knocked back the entire thing in one gulp. She 
blinked at him in mild shock, her mind whirling. Shit! She didn't 
think he'd just *down* the drink, she figured he'd *sip* it like 
*normal* people do. Now she only had a few minutes before that drug 
would kick in. Damn!

The blonde 'vampire' offered her up a sexy leer and she was just 
about to start flirting with him and leading him back to her dorm 
room when another guy, a brunette dressed up as a 'pirate' stormed 
over to him and grabbed the blonde by the arm. Spinning her would be 
boyfriend around to face him, the 'pirate' scowled around his eye-
patch and hissed in anger.

"Spike! What in the name of hell are you doing here?! If Buffy 
catches you she's gonna turn you into the *big bad* pile of dust!" 

"What? Oh. Don't mind me. I'm just doing my part to piss off the 
Religious Right."

"Huh?"

Julie watched the 'vampire' point out a blonde 'Aphrodite' and her 
winged date 'Cupid' in the corner. The 'pirate' let out a groan of 
dismay and before Julie could complain, he dragged away her rich and 
handsome 'vampire'. Fuck! This is *so* not good. First of all, there 
was all of the Fantasy that she'd dumped in the guy's drink, 
expensive shit that it was, and now some stupid 'pirate' just pulled 
him out of her reach. She wouldn't put up with that crap. Hosting up 
the sea-shell bra of her 'mermaid' costume, Julie stomped off into 
the crowd to go collect her 'vampire'.

***** 

Xander couldn't hold back a groan when he say Buffy and Riley 
standing on the far side of the room dressed as the Goddess and God 
of Love. Grabbing hold of Spike and hoping that the vampire wouldn't 
resist, Xander dragged him through the crowded room and into the 
hallway. Swarms of people in bizarre and wild costumes flowed around 
them, but he was able to navigate past everyone to a semi-quiet 
corner. Turning to face his sometime fuck-friend, sometime tormenter, 
Xander growled.

"Spike! What is *wrong* with you? Has your chip short-circuited and 
made you stupid? Buffy is *so* angry about that whole Initiative 
Doctor thing that she will stake you on site. *What* are you doing 
here?"

Spike's eyes roamed wildly around at the passing party-goers, a wide 
happy grin on his gameface.

"Me? I'm enjoying a party. Lot's of pretty colors and everyone smells 
*so* yummy."

A slight frown creased his ridged brow.

"Um... I think someone slipped me a mickey."

Xander blinked in confusion at the blonde.

"What did someone do?"

Spike snarled slightly, too enthralled with the swirling colors and 
the pulsing music to work up any real anger.

"You know, a mickey. When they put something illegal and made of 
chemicals in your drink so's you get all pissed."

Xander considered this for a moment and then groaned. This was *not* 
of the good. He was supposed to be having a night of relaxing fun and 
now here he was in a dorm full of costumed college students with a 
stoned vampire.

"Right. Time to leave. I'll... help you back to your crypt so you can 
let this... whatever it is wear off. Come on."

It was at that point that a girl dressed up like a carrot walked by. 
She had leafy green ribbons in her hair and orange stocking clad legs 
stuck out of the bottom of her puffy costume. Spike grinned and waved 
Xander aside and he started to follow the girl.

"Maybe later pet. I'm gonna go nibble on the carrot-girl for a while. 
Just drain her dry a *little* bit."

A tingle of panic sizzled through Xander and he clutched at Spike, 
barely holding him back.

"No! You can't, your chip will go off and I *don't* want to deal with 
a vamp who's decided to have a bad trip. That's *not* how I planned 
my evening."

Spike waved off his concern.

"Not to worry. 4 out of 5 vampires agree. Vegetarians taste better."

Xander used his hold on Spike to turn him around and he began to 
gently, but swiftly lead him to the doors. Halfway down the hall, 
Spike accosted a guy wearing a gray alien mask.

"Do you Martian blokes *really* kidnap people, perform anal probes 
and then dump the mind washed bodies in the middle of crop-circles 
with skinned cows? I mean, you can tell *me*, after all, inquiring 
minds want to know... or some such rot."

The frat-boy in the plastic mask made a feeble joke about too much 
alcohol and then *hurried* away down the hall. Spike wasn't put off 
by it though. He called out a cheerful goodbye to the guy to Xander's 
painful embarrassment.

"Oh! Right, I got it. It's all hush-hush secret take over the world 
and enslave the humans as cattle stuff. Well, you can count on me. 
Mum's the word."

Fighting the urge to scream, Xander pushed and shoved through the 
crowd until he was *finally* able to get them both outside. The speed 
and relative ease of their journey to his car was offset by the fact 
that he was constantly subjected to Spike's drug-influenced need to 
describe and comment on everyone's choice of costume along the way, 
usually to the poor fashion victim's face. Xander was caught between 
the horribly rude urge to laugh loudly and shrink away in 
mortification all at once. 

He was especially embarrassed when Spike *loudly* announced to the 
*entire* campus that he was being vamp-napped by a ruthless pirate 
who undoubtedly wanted to ravage his body and then hold him for 
ransom. Of course, he knew he'd made a tactical error as soon as he 
mumbled under his breath that if body ravaging would shut Spike up 
then body ravaging he would get. He had forgotten about vampiric 
hearing altogether and now he had a *silent and leering* stoned 
vampire to deal with. 

Gratefully, they reached his car without further mishap. Not 
bothering to stop and think, Xander just opened the passenger door 
and *shoved* Spike in. Stomping around to the driver's side, he 
climbed in, buckled his seat belt and started the car. In a flash, 
Spike slid across the seat and began to fondle him while whispering 
naughty things about the joys of ravagement. 

While Xander wasn't *adverse* to sex in a car, he didn't want to 
experience it in the parking lot behind Buffy's dorm house. Casting 
about for some way to make Spike behave, he tried to first thing that 
came to mind.

"Hey! Buckle up!"

Spike stopped his groping and blinked at him in confusion.

"Why? I'm *dead*. Not like your driving can kill me, can it?"

"Well, no... but it *will* make it harder for the aliens to suck you 
out of the car."

Spike paused, nodded once and then slid back across the car. He was 
halfway buckled up when he stopped and let his features melt back 
into his human mask. He frowned in confusion as his drug soaked mind 
worked through his thought.

"Um, pet? Why is that a bad thing? The aliens, I mean. After all, I 
*like* a good anal probe."

Xander turned in his seat as far as the seat-belt would let him and 
shoved a finger up in front of Spike's face.

"Hey! *I'm* the only one that's going to be doing any anal probes on 
you. *Got that*!"

Spike's frown shifted into an amused leer.

"Oooo pet. I *like* it when you get all possessive and dangerously 
jealous. It's soooo *vampiric*. Makes me go all tingly inside, it 
does."

Xander's face clearly showed his struggle to decide if being compared 
to a vampire was a *good* thing or a *bad* thing, but eventually, he 
gave up the debate. Another, more interesting thought had taken it's 
place in his head.

"Ya know Spike... if you're a *good* vamp, I'll let you bend me over 
a tombstone after I'm done ravaging you on top of your crypt."

Spike chortled with glee.

"You're such fun when you're horny. Let's go pet. The night is 
wasting."

And with that, Xander slammed his car in gear and the vampire and the 
pirate drove off into the Sunnydale night.