The gang had been at the Karaoke Bar for over two hours and all of them were in high spirits. It was Christmas Eve, they were all together now that they had met up with Anya and David and the girls had fallen in love with Lorne. Willow had been a little cautious when Harmony had approached but upon hearing she was no longer killing humans and was friends with Cordy and the others, Willow had relaxed a little. They had all been drinking, although they were careful not to get drunk...they didn't want to corrupt Dawn too bad after all. They had allowed the girl to have some spiked egg nog and Dawn was excited to be included with the 'adults'.

Lorne had insisted that everyone that came into the bar that night had to sing a song....anything but Christmas songs. He was caroled out as he had put it. They clapped as a one horned demon left the stage, Dawn turning to Xander, a frown on her pretty face.

"Did the egg nog do something to my hearing or did he just sing 'My Everything'?"

"Yeah, but I think sing is the wrong word for it. It was more like grunting." Willow grinned at her friend.

"Since when did you start listening to 98 Degrees? I thought you only listened to country music. Is this a side effect of you being gay?"

"No. I happen to like boy bands...and Elvis." Xander's face flushed red when his friends started laughing. "Not in a GAY way. I like their music...that's all."

"Yes, I remember. I bought you that 'Backroads Boys' lunch box." Anya pointed out.

"It's BackSTREET boys, Ahn and thanks for telling everyone."

"Whatever." Anya shrugged before turning her attention back to David, who was clearly enjoying it.

"Don't let them get to you, Xan. I like all those bands, too." Dawn patted his hand. Xander smiled, taking her hand and leaning across the table until he was closer to her. Everyone was shocked into silence when he started singing to her.

I"ll give you the moon at night, I'll give you the stars to light your eyes I'll give you the sun to make just one more dawn, so another day may come I'll give you my heart and soul, I'll be there to catch you when you fall When you ask me what I'll give to you, girl, I'll give it all.

He leaned closer so he could give Dawn a kiss on the cheek. Angel, Spike and the others smiled as Dawn blushed, happiness written all over her face at being the attention of her crush. *Oh my God, Xander sang to me and then he kissed me*. Dawn sat back, a small sigh escaping her lips.

"Will you marry me?" Dawn's blush deepened when she realized she had said the words aloud.

"Sorry, niblet. Xander's already taken." Spike pulled Xander into a kiss. Dawn watched as first Spike and then Angel kissed Xander. *Three hot guys...all taken. Damn.* Dawn glanced around the table, her eyes lighting on Wesley and Oz. "Well, at least you two aren't taken yet."

"Oh, no. I'm much too old for you, Dawn. If I were a bit younger, I would definitely...but I'm not, so I wouldn't." Wesley's blush rivaled Dawn's from earlier.

"Same here." Oz stared at the drink in his hand, Xander noticing his reluctance to say anything further. He and Willow exchanged a glance, both of them knowing Oz well enough to know when he was just being his usual quiet self and when he was trying to hide something.

"Spill it." Willow demanded.

"What?"

"Who is she?"

"Not a she." Oz smiled at his friends. "Actually, it's Lorne."

"Lorne?" Xander practically shouted, excited at the prospect of his two friends being a couple. He turned to see Spike and Angel smiling knowingly. "You two knew?" Both of them nodded. "How?" Spike tapped his nose, while Cordelia wrinkled hers.

"You could smell it? That's just...euuw. Not you and Lorne, Oz. I'm talking about the smelling part." Cordelia sat back, taking in the news. "Are we the only ones that are straight?" She pointed at herself, Doyle, David and Anya.

"I am. Well, at least I think so. I haven't really started dating yet but I'm pretty sure I like guys." Dawn stared at Xander, Spike and Angel appreciatively. Everyone turned to look at Wesley.

"What? Yes, very straight...straight as an arrow."

"So why don't we see you with any girls?" Cordy asked.

"I see women...very attractive women...I just prefer not to kiss and tell that's all."

"I can attest to that. He had sex with that bleached blonde that came into the office last week to ask for directions." Angel said.

"Good Lord." Wesley mumbled.

"I'll say. I never thought you had the tiniest bit of sex." Cordelia said as Lorne approached their table.

"Did I hear you mention my name, crumbcake?" He asked Xander, who jumped up from the table and hugged him.

"We just found out...about you and Oz."

"Well, it's about time. I told him you guys would be happy for us."

"Of course we are. Why didn't you want to tell us, Oz?"

"I just wanted to keep quiet about our relationship until we were sure. We both knew how excited you would be."

"I'm not that bad about playing matchmaker am I?" Xander looked around the table at his friends. All of them were smiling and nodding their heads. "Sorry about that. I only want everyone to be happy...as happy as I am. I'll try to tone it down from now on."

"Don't you dare. How do you think I ended up with Sarah...the bleached blonde?" Wesley asked. "If I recall, it was you that pushed me next to her so I could give the directions."

"Okay, yeah I did. But as happy as I am for Lorne and Oz I had nothing to do with that. What brought you together? Your common love of music?"

"Among other things," Lorne grinned.

"Well, it's always nice to have a common ground when you're starting a new relationship. You two appreciate music like David and I appreciate money." Anya pointed out.

"Anya, I don't appreciate the money...don't even care about it." David protested.

"Yes, but see that's what makes us so perfect for one another. You make money, don't give a damn about it and I love to spend and invest it. Also, you're very sweet and extremely sensitive." David smiled at those words.

"Speaking of music, which one of you is going to sing first?" Lorne surveyed the table, one hand on his hip while he sipped at his SeaBreeze. Cordelia jumped up, pulling Doyle along with her.

"Come on, Doyle. Let's get this over with before we have to follow someone who can actually sing." Doyle protested but found himself pulled to the stage by his girlfriend. Lorne pulled a chair over and sat down next to Oz. Cordelia and Doyle began to sing 'I've Got You Babe' complete with Cordelia tossing her long, brunette hair back in a Cher like motion.

"Those two were made for each other." Lorne commented, taking Oz's hand in his. Xander smiled, happy that they had become a couple and determined to help Wesley find his true love. Angel and Spike squeezed Xander's hands, all of them pleased that their family was happy. After Doyle and Cordy were done, everyone stood and cheered, Xander and Oz loudly whistling. "Who's next?" Tara and Willow stood and headed for the stage as Doyle and Cordelia took their seats.

Sometimes I feel like I've never quite fit in, like I'm always a little out of place, It's hard to be everything to everyone, there's so many roles I have to play Sometimes I'm just barely hanging on, seems like I'm always fighting to be strong, To find somewhere I belong. When you love me every part of me feels like I'm right where I'm meant to be When you touch me you reach through to my soul to the truest place in me Baby in your arms I'm free to just be a woman.

I can't believe how beautiful I feel, there is nothing here to hide, I'm unafraid and so completely real, oh and never more alive This life can be so hard to understand, but your eyes oh they see me as I am And you take me as I am. When you love me every part of me feels like I'm right where I'm meant to be When you touch me, you reach through to my soul to the truest place in me Baby in your arms I'm free to just be a woman.

Baby hold me close, never let me go never let me go When you love me every part of me feels like I'm right where I'm meant to be. When you touch me, you reach through to my soul to the truest place in me Baby in your arms I'm free, oh, baby in your arms I'm free to just be a woman. To just be a woman.

Again, the table full of people rose and cheered, tears trailing down Lorne's cheek. "Those two are perfect together. Soul mates to the very core of their being." Xander hugged the girls, praising Tara's beautiful voice. Willow had been content to stand in Tara's embrace as the girl sang to her.

"Okay, enough with the mushy stuff. Cordy come sing a song with me." Dawn stood up, grabbing the older girl's hand and leading her back to the stage.

"But I've already sung." Cordy's protest was cut off when Dawn whispered something in her ear. A broad grin appeared on Cordy's face and Doyle looked nervously at the others.

"What do you think they're up to?" Xander shrugged.

"Knowing those two...there's no telling." Everyone sat back to listen.

Someday I'm gonna be famous, do I have talent, well no These days you don't really need it thanks to reality shows Can't wait to date a super model, can't wait to sue my dad Can't wait to wreck a ferrari on my way to rehab Cause when you're a celebrity, it's adios reality You can act just like a fool, people think you're cool, just cause you're on t.v. I can throw a major fit when my latte isn't just how I like it They say I've gone insane, I'll blame it on the fame and the pressures that go with being a celebrity

I get to cry to Barbara Walters when things don't go my way And I'll get community service no matter which law I break I'll make the supermarket tabloids, they'll write some awful stuff But the more they run my name down, the more my price goes up Cause when you're a celebrity, it's adios reality No matter what you do, people think you're cool, just cause you're on t.v. And I can fall in and out of love, have marriages that barely last a month When they go down the drain, I'll blame it on the fame and say it's just so tough being a celebrity

So let's hitch up the wagons and head out west to the land of fun and the sun We'll be real world bachelorettes jack ass millionaires, hey hey Hollywood here we come When you're a celebrity, it's adios reality No matter what you do, people think you're cool, just cause you're on t.v. Being a celebrity, yeah a celebrity.

Everyone laughed at Dawn's choice of songs as they cheered for them, Doyle clearly relieved. Dawn and Cordy bowed several times, enjoying the attention. When they returned to their seats, Dawn was practically bouncing with enthusiasm.

"I don't know if it's being in L.A. or being around Cordy but I've decided I want to be an actress." Dawn told them as Oz grabbed Wesley's arm.

"Let's go choose our song." Wesley tried to decline, telling Oz how badly he sang but Oz wouldn't listen. Xander turned to Dawn.

"No rehab, no lots of marriages, no wrecking of cars and no breaking the law." He stopped a minute before adding, "And no dating super models."

"Not even---"

"No!" Everyone interrupted before listening as Wesley and Oz sang their own rendition of "Imagine". Once again the table burst into applause, Lorne's louder than anyone's as he proudly watched his boyfriend approach. He gave Oz a kiss before congratulating both of them on a job well done. Anya sang next...her rendition of 'Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend' drawing quite a few cheers.

"She was good." Xander told David, who was clapping so hard his hands were turning red. Anya bounced over, giving David a long kiss before sitting down.

"You're not only beautiful...you have the voice of an angel." David's compliment earned him a hug. Lorne turned to look at the others. Xander quickly shook his head.

"Already sang, Lorne."

"Yeah, to me." Dawn stated proudly. Lorne's attention was on Spike and Angel now.

"Lorne, I've told you I don't sing." Angel told him.

"Truer words have never been spoken." Doyle agreed. "It's more like a...croaking...or maybe it's a choking sound...hell, I don't know if there's a word to describe his voice."

"Can't is more the word." Cordy corrected.

"Hey! That's our guy you're talking about." Xander gave Angel a hug while Spike smirked.

"Cheerleader's just stating a fact."

"Then I guess it's your turn, Spike." Angel returned the smirk. Spike sat back, his hands across his chest.

"Nothing up there I want to sing. Lorne doesn't have any music for the Sex Pistols or the Ramones."

"Any excuse is better than none." Angel told him. Spike glared at his lover.

"You've heard me sing, Angel. You know I can. Just don't want to."

"Whatever."

"I don't think he can. He's probably as bad as Angel." Doyle teased.

"Angel, tell them I can sing."

"He can sing." Angel mocked Spike's words, no conviction in his voice.

"Angel!"

"What? I told them, didn't I?"

"Sounded like a bloody robot. Say it like you mean it." Angel stood up, pointing at Spike as he spoke loud enough for everyone in the room to hear.

"Spike can sing! Hey, everybody Spike can sing. Really! Isn't that great?!"

"Soddin' wanker." Spike grumbled as Angel sat down, proud of himself for irritating Spike. He wanted his lover to get up and perform. Angel knew how good Spike was and he wanted Xander to hear for himself. Xander turned pleading eyes on Spike.

"Come on, Spike. I've never heard you sing. Won't you do it for me?" Spike tried not to look at those beautiful brown eyes as he shook his head stubbornly. Just then they heard a voice behind them.

"Don't worry, Xander. If Spike and Angel can't satisfy your needs, I can." Lindsey smirked at the group. Spike and Angel started to rise but Lorne and Doyle stopped them as Xander spoke.

"Oh, they satisfy my needs. Every single one of them. Including protecting me from irritating and dangerous people whether I need it or not. So just go away before you get yourself into trouble. Consider that a warning for old time's sake."

"They won't do anything to me, Xander. They're the GOOD guys."

"Anyone want to place a bet on that? 10 to 1 odds say they kill him." Doyle intoned, gesturing at Lindsey.

"No violence in Caritas." Lorne reminded them.

"Yeah, let it go Angel. You, too Spike. He's just trying to get under your skin. Don't give him the satisfaction." Wesley told them, glaring at Lindsey before turning back to his friends. "Why don't we go?"

"Good idea." Xander agreed but Spike shook his head.

"Not leaving yet, luv. Lorne said I had to sing first." Spike got up, pulling Xander up with him. He put his arm around Xander's waist, possessively holding him close as he walked to the stage. Angel turned to Lindsey.

"You'll have to wait till Spike's finished." Lindsey snorted at those words.

"Gladly. I can't wait to see him make a fool of himself. I may not be a vampire but there is one thing I know...Xander LOVED to hear me sing. Got to him every time. The things he would do..."

"You better start thinking about the things I'm going to do to YOU if you don't get out of my face." Angel growled.

"You don't kill humans." Lindsey retorted.

"You don't qualify."

"Oooh, are you getting a taste of Angelus, Lindsey?" Lilah walked over, mistletoe in hand. She surveyed the table before walking up to Wesley, dangling the mistletoe over the man's head. "You do remember what to do when sitting under this, don't you?" Her voice was almost a purr.

"Indeed I do. You kiss the prettiest girl you can find." Wesley leaned over, placing a kiss on Dawn's cheek. He looked up at the woman's flustered face as Dawn giggled. "You didn't really expect me to choose you, did you? Not with so many beautiful women at this table." Lilah's face turned red with anger as she grabbed Lindsey's arm.

"Come on, Lindsey. Let's go to the bar. I need a drink."

"Fine by me. I want to be closer to the stage so I can enjoy the view. It will help me tune out the tone deaf vampire who's about to...nah, I can't even say it." Lindsey walked over to the bar, leaning against it as he watched Spike and Xander. Angel started to laugh, surprising everyone at the table.

"Why are you laughing, Angel? Lindsey just dissed Spike and he's making moon eyes at Xander." Cordelia pointed out, her happy moment of watching Wesley put Lilah in her place gone.

"I'm laughing because Lindsey is going to be the one who ends up looking like a fool."

"Spike's that good?" Cordy asked, remembering how nice Lindsey's voice was.

"He's that good."

"What's going on?" Dawn whispered to Cordy, having seen the tense exchange between the men.

"That guy. ..that's Lindsey. Xander's ex." Dawn glanced over at the handsome man, shaking her head. "Wow, Xander has good taste." That last sentence earned her a round of horrified looks. "Sorry, I was just...." Dawn was stopped by Angel's low growls. Willow grinned at the vampire.

"Do you want me to turn him into a frog? Or send him to some hell dimension? Cause I can." Angel shook his head.

"As appealing as that sounds right now, no. Besides, I think Spike's got this one covered." Angel sat back, a smirk that would rival Spike's on his face. *So Lindsey thought he was a great singer? He hasn't heard Spike.*

Spike was up on the stage, looking through the song list while Xander stood next to him, a confused expression on his face. After a few moments Spike hit a button on the machine, taking the microphone and turning to face Xander. He took the boy in his arms and held him close as he began to sing.

Wise men say only fools rush in, but I can't help falling in love with you

As the music became louder, Spike started to move, his left thigh between Xander's legs, Xander's right thigh between his. It was a gentle sway, their bodies sliding against one another. Spike's left hand was on Xander's shoulder, while the right held the microphone. Xander had his hands on Spike's hips, his thumbs lightly rubbing across them as he smiled at the vampire, his expression one of pure love.

Shall I stay? Would it be a sin. If I can't help falling in love with you. Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling so it goes some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life too, for I can't help falling in love with you.

As the music played, the two of them looked longingly at each other, Spike reaching up to run his fingers through Xander's hair while Xander leaned into his lover's caress. Xander slid his hands up Spike's body, gently rubbing across his firm chest. Spike leaned in for a kiss and their mouths met, lips parting to allow their tongues to touch. The swaying continued, turning more into a soft grind of their bodies. Xander slid his hands down Spike's stomach, his hands once again finding Spike's hips. As the kiss continued, Xander ran his hands under Spike's long coat, cupping the vampire's ass and pulling him closer. They ended their kiss and Spike smiled at Xander, his fingers tracing the outline of Xander's jaw as he started to sing again.

Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling so it goes some things are meant to be. Take my hand...

Xander took the hand away from his jaw, placing gentle kisses on it before starting to nibble on Spike's index finger, his eyes never leaving Spike's. Spike's voice was strained, the passion burning deep inside him as he finished the song.

take my whole life too, for I can't help falling in love with you.

When Spike was finished, he laid the microphone on the speaker and took Xander's mouth in a passionate kiss. His arms wrapped around the boy, one hand stroking Xander's back the other cupping the back of the boy's head, pulling him into a deeper kiss. Everyone sat quietly, having been entranced first by Spike's voice and then by the obvious love between the two men. After a few moments, the AI gang recovered, rising to their feet to loudly cheer their friends. Everyone else did the same, clearly impressed with the blonde vampire's singing. Xander and Spike stopped kissing, turning their heads to see the entire room giving Spike a standing ovation. Xander grinned as he rested his head against Spike's.

"Looks like you were a hit."

"Yeah, but we have a problem, luv."

"What's that?"

"How are we supposed to get down off this fucking stage sporting the hard ons we have?" Xander turned horrified eyes on Spike.

"No fair. You've got the long black coat to hide yours."

"Just follow my lead, Xan." Spike took Xander's hand, wrapping his coat tightly around his waist before turning and leading the boy off the stage. Xander made sure he stayed close to Spike which wasn't helping the raging hard on he had gotten the minute Spike had started singing. *Damn, Spike's voice was sexy.* Spike stopped in front of Lindsey, giving him a cocking smile.

"Stage is all yours, lawyer. And by the way...don't ever challenge me again, boy. The next time you do the results may not be as pleasant." Spike turned away, leading Xander towards their table.

Halfway to the table they were stopped by a crowd of demons and humans who were converging on Spike, asking for an encore. Spike tried to push past them, but they started to reach out to him, trying to get his attention. Spike got angry, pushing harder and knocking some of them out of his way. A jolt of pain coursed through him....just like the chip. He came to an abrupt halt, not hearing the enthusiastic chatter of his fans or Xander's voice asking him what was wrong. All he could think about was being back in that lab, doctors opening his skull and shoving that hateful piece of hardware in his brain. Spike's hands automatically went to his head as he bent forward, a small sob of frustration coming from him.

Xander had been trying to get Spike's attention but the vampire wasn't hearing him. He saw Spike's hands go to his head, heard the small sob and suddenly it dawned on him exactly what was going on. He took Spike in his arms, trying to calm the vampire but it wasn't doing any good. Xander's mind was racing, trying to think of a way to help Spike. Angel. Angel had helped Spike before...he could do it again. If they could get through the throng of people.

"Please move out of our way." Xander tried the nice guy routine but it wasn't having any effect on the others. He tried to forcefully push past only to be jolted like Spike had been earlier. "Angel! Angel we need you!" Spike's choked sobs of frustration were getting worse and Xander knew that Angel wouldn't be able to get through any more than they could. Finally, he did the only thing he could think of. He stood on top of a nearby chair, making sure to keep Spike close. His eyes searched the crowd, finding the two people he thought could help.

"Will...Tara, get that protection spell down! Spike needs help! Get it down NOW!" He saw Willow nod and he stepped down off the chair, sitting down and pulling Spike onto his lap, cradling the vampire as he kept the others away. "Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll protect you until Angel gets here." ***********************************

The gang had been applauding along with the others, happily whistling and cheering for their friends. Spike had a wonderful voice and he and Xander had been beautiful up there together....very hot. Willow glanced behind her and noticed Angel still sitting, his legs crossed.

"Angel, get up and cheer for Spike. You're not being a very supportive boyfriend." Willow's voice was innocent as everyone looked at Angel, who shifted uncomfortably.

"Can't stand up. That was....Damn, I need to learn how to sing."

"Good luck with that one, Angel-man." Doyle patted him on the shoulder.

"I'd stick with the drawing, Angel. You're good at that." Cordelia pointed out, earning a mock glare from her friend. "What? That was supposed to be a compliment." Angel was about to respond when he heard Xander yelling for help. He stood up, catching a glimpse of Xander holding onto a very shaken Spike. Immediately, he was trying to push his way to his lover's side but was stopped by the same thing that had stopped Spike and Xander....Lorne's damn protection spell. "Lorne! Get that spell down!"

"I can't Angel. I had someone else do it. I don't know how...." Lorne stopped when he heard Xander yell at Willow and Tara. He watched as Willow and Tara began to chant. A small bolt of light and Lorne knew the two witches had gotten the barrier down.

"Go, Angel. It's down." Willow told him. Angel rushed towards the crowd, hearing Willow's shout. "Seperate!" Demons and humans went flying across the room, making a path for Angel to get to his loved ones. He quickly made his way to Spike's side, the others close behind. They made a protective circle around the three as Lorne and Oz started ushering the crowd out the door, telling them the bar was closing.

"Spike, are you alright?" Angel cupped Spike's face in his hands, staring into the blue eyes that were full of fear and anger. Angel could smell the despair coming from Spike and he leaned closer. "Spike...my boy...it's Angel. I'm here. Everything's okay."

"You gotta help him, Angel. Spike's wigging out because he got jolted by that spell. It was like...you know." Angel heard Xander's worried voice and realized what the boy was trying to tell him. Spike was having memories of that fucking lab...the chip. Angel began to growl, wishing he could kill those soldiers all over again...making their deaths as long and pain filled as possible.

"Oh, you mean the...." Cordelia began but Xander cut her off.

"Yeah, that." He glanced around the room and Cordy realized Xander didn't want anyone, especially Lindsey or Lilah, to overhear what was wrong with Spike.

Angel managed to push the rage back, standing up and scooping Spike into his arms. He sat down on a chair near Xander's, changing into his vampire visage. He quickly bit into his wrist and held it under Spike's nose, hoping the familiar scent would snap Spike out of his trance. After a few seconds passed Spike changed too. He took Angel's arm, guiding it to his mouth. He started to suck on the open wound, drawing the powerful blood out of his sire...his lover. Angel placed his hand behind Spike's neck, leaning in to gently kiss the vampire's forehead and cheeks. Spike licked the wound closed before pulling Angel closer. They began to kiss, Spike's arms going around Angel's neck, deepening it.

Xander stood up and backed away, tears running down his cheeks. He brushed them away as he continued to watch his lovers. Xander's heart ached for Spike. Memories of the stories Spike had told about his time at the Initiative flooded Xander's mind. *How could humans be so fucking cruel?* Xander knew that Spike and Angel would both be aroused after the feeding and Spike needed Angel's reassurances right now. He walked over and leaned down, tapping Angel on the shoulder.

"Angel?" Angel and Spike stopped kissing, the older vampire looking at Xander. "Why don't you take Spike home?"

"What about you?" Angel asked. Xander saw the way Spike was clutching at Angel's collar, his face nestling against Angel's shoulder.

"I'm gonna stay here with the rest of the gang. Help Lorne clean this place up while Willow and Tara put the protection spell back in place. Then we'll have a drink or two and head home. Enough time for you two to be together."

"Aren't you coming with us?" Xander shook his head. "Spike needs YOU, Angel. I can't help him with this, not now." Angel stared at Xander, trying to gauge the boy's feelings. "I understand, Angel. Go on. Let David and Anya take you guys home. We'll take the van." Angel smiled at Xander, knowing the boy was being honest. There was no hint of jealousy...only concern. Angel helped Spike up as he waited for Xander to collect David and Anya. After a few moments the four of them left, Xander watching them go as Anya lectured them about no sex in the back of the car. He turned to face his friends.

"Let's get this place back in shape." Everyone started picking up chairs, overturned tables and spilled drinks. It was going to be a long night. ******************************************************************

Angel slid into the bed next to Spike, relieved to see a spark of recognition and love in his eyes. Spike had been quiet since they left the club, never uttering a word on the ride home. Angel had helped Spike out of the car, thanking David for the ride before leading the other vampire through the apartment and into the bedroom. He had set Spike on the side of the bed, slowly divesting the blonde of all his clothes. Angel had made sure Spike was tucked away in the bed before shedding his own clothes. Now Angel took Spike in his arms, gently running his fingers through his lover's hair as his head rested on his chest. After a few minutes, Spike raised his head.

"Where's Xander?"

"Back at the club with the others." Spike looked worried now. "Why didn't he come home with us? Is he upset? And what about Lindsey?"

"Xander's not upset. He wanted us to have some time alone. Thought it would be better this way. And Lorne got rid of everyone...including Lindsey. I made sure he was out of the club before I left and he was nowhere outside. Besides, with the protection spell out of the way, I don't think Lindsey wants to take on the gang. Xander's safe." Angel ran his fingers down Spike's chiseled jaw, loving the feel of it. "It's okay now, baby. I'm here; let yourself need me. Tell me what you need, Spike."

"I need you to hold me and love me like this. Need you to make love to me." Angel bent down, taking Spike's mouth in a gentle kiss. "Please don't ever leave me, Angel. My heart needs you, my cock needs you, and I need you." Angel kissed along Spike's jaw, down his throat and his neck before moving down the bed. He took Spike's cock in his hand and glanced up at the other vampire, pure love in his eyes.

"Never going to leave you again, my precious boy. I want to protect and heal you with my touch....like this." Angel's hand moved to the base of Spike's cock as he placed tender kisses along the hardened shaft. He swirled his tongue around the head, licking the pre-cum from the slit before running his tongue up and down Spike's erection.

Spike moaned, his hands coming to rest on the top of Angel's head, trying to guide the older vampire. He needed this....needed it so much. Angel quit teasing his lover, knowing Spike needed more. He took Spike's cock into his mouth, lovingly licking and caressing it before starting to suck. Angel nudged Spike's legs further apart, gliding his finger along Spike's balls. He played with first one and then the other, the sucking becoming more intense, the stroking more firm. Spike writhed underneath him, desperate for release. Angel raised his head, never stopping the hand that was moving up and down Spike's cock.

"Can you feel my passion for you pouring through my fingertips as I stroke you harder and faster?"

"Yes...oh, fuck yes." Spike managed to say before his orgasm swept through him. Angel watched as Spike came, taking an unneeded breath at the sight of his lover. He dipped his fingers into the cum, wetting them before sliding his finger into Spike's pink hole.

"So beautiful my sweet William, my wonderful Spike." Angel continued to prepare Spike, touching his prostate and making Spike arch upwards. Spike groaned, spreading his legs wider. "That's it, baby....I want you completely open to me everywhere I touch you."

"I want you, Angel. Want you so much." Angel slipped his fingers out, lubing his own cock with Spike's cum before entering the younger vampire. After a moment he began to slowly thrust in and out. "Yes, Angel....like that. I feel safe with you inside me...it's where you belong." Spike gripped Angel's shoulders as the older vampire's thrusts became more urgent.

"Always belonged in you. Always will." Angel kissed Spike, his tongue sliding in and out in time with his thrusts. He felt Spike's muscles clench around his erection, heard Spike's muffled scream and he toppled over the edge, filling Spike with his love. Their orgasms seemed to go on forever, neither one wanting it to stop. When they were done, Angel pulled out of Spike, rolling over on the bed and taking the other vampire in his arms. He kissed Spike's forehead. "Do you want to talk?"

"Don't know if I can." Angel grinned at Spike's sated tone. "That was bloody amazing. Is it just me or has it gotten better?"

"It's not just you. And it has."

"I thought so." Spike turned his head so he could look at Angel. "You made me feel like I melted all over the bed. But that can't be right because vampires don't melt." He shook his head, trying to get his brain to function.

"Thank you for letting me love you again." Angel hugged him before continuing, a concerned and loving expression on his face. "I don't want to ruin this, but I think we need to talk...or at least I need to say this again. I am so sorry you had to go through what you did...that I wasn't there for you, yet again."

"You didn't know Angel. Besides, I'm glad you weren't. They might have gotten you too."

"Still, I wish I could have spared you...never wanted anything like that to happen to you even when I was Angelus. I might have been an asshole back then but I would have destroyed anyone who dared touch you. I might have hurt you but no one else was allowed to. Damn, I can only imagine what those bastards put you through."

"Wasn't that bad." Spike protested, trying to hide his face. Angel cupped his hand under Spike's chin, lifting his head back up.

"Don't do that. Don't downplay what that....piece of shit did to your life. What those bastards..." Angel's voice choked with rage, his demon howling for justice that would never come. "I wish I could have killed them all. They had no right to do what they did."

"I should have been stronger...should have done something to stop them."

"What could you have done? They blindsided you, Spike. Just like the gypsies did me. Do you know how many times I've wished that I had done things differently? We can't look back...can't change the past. And do you know who taught me that? You and Xander. Before you two entered my life for the second time I was a broody bastard...now I'm happy. I don't just exist....I live. I've seen the hell that both of you have lived through and it makes my getting a soul seem like a tiny stumbling block compared to your pain."

"That's not true. I used to make fun of you for being broody but now I understand. That curse...the soul...it changed your life as much as the chip changed mine. Neither one of us could live as what we are...vampires. Every time we did, there was pain. Only difference was your pain was caused by magics and mine was caused by a piece of metal those wankers shoved into my brain. You lived like that for over 100 years...I had the chip for a few months. Seems I got the better end of the deal."

"Don't know about that. I was the only one torturing myself. I caged myself away from the world. What I did, I chose to do. You had no such choice. Your freedom was taken away from you by others who tortured you for their own fun." Angel hugged Spike closer before smiling at him. "Let's quit playing 'who went through the most pain' and just acknowledge to one another that there was pain and regrets along with the bad memories for both of us."

"And nightmares." Spike added. "So how long does it take for the nightmares to go away? The flashbacks?"

"I wish I could tell you they go away but they don't. Not really. They creep up on you when you least expect them, just like they did tonight. The only thing I know for certain is that we can get through them because we have one another. We have Xander. And we have a family who loves us. I can't speak for you but I find it's easier now that I have people to care about. I'm not alone anymore. I never thought I would say this but I'm grateful for the curse. While it's brought me so much pain, it's brought me even greater joy. If I had done something differently I would still be the cruel monster I was...not caring about anyone but myself. I didn't know what love was back then...not even when I had it with you. With Buffy...I thought it was perfect at the time but it wasn't. Way too many problems, too much baggage. When I left Sunnydale, I thought I was leaving happiness behind but I was wrong. I've found my happiness here in L.A. with you, Xander and our family. And that would never have happened without the curse."

"Guess I could say the same thing about the...chip."

"No, you understood love before that....that thing. You loved Dru, you loved me."

"Maybe so, but if I hadn't been chipped I would have turned Xander. My demon was crying out for him and it was only natural that I would want to do that but the chip stopped me. Now I realize how wrong that would have been. I love Xander the way he is...love the way his body warms us as we lay beside him, love to hear the way his heart pounds when we enter a room or when we make love to him and I don't think I've ever heard a vampire babble." Both of them laughed at those words. "Still say he would have made a beautiful vampire."

"Aye, that he would." They lay there for a moment, wrapped in each other's arms. "So when should we claim him?"

"I want to do it now but I want it to be special for him. How about New Year's Eve? We can start the new year out right?" Angel smiled at him.

"Sounds perfect. We'll tell him when he gets home. Are you okay now?" Spike nodded and Angel kissed him one more time before rising from the bed. "Let's take our minds off of the past and do something. Why don't we go play Santa Claus. I've got a feeling there will be no sleeping in this house tonight, so while they're gone we can fill their stockings." Spike nodded, rising to join Angel.

"Talk about strange. Ever heard of a vampire Santa?" Both of them laughed at the mental picture of a fat, red-suited Santa with fangs. **************************************

"This is the last of it." Oz handed the bag of garbage to Xander.

"Thank God. I want to get home, make sure Spike is alright and begin the party."

"Me too." Dawn came up, holding another bag of garbage. "Let's get these out of here while Willow and Tara do their witchy stuff. Once that's done, the fun begins again." The two of them started for the back alley. "Do you think Spike is going to be okay?"

"Positive. It takes more than that to put him down." Xander threw his bag into the dumpster before reaching for the one Dawn held out to him.

"How come you didn't go with them?" Xander turned to face the girl, wondering how to answer her question.

"They needed some time alone, Dawnster. See, Angel is Spike's sire....remember the blood thing?" Dawn nodded. "As much as we all love each other there are times when Spike is going to need Angel and vice versa. It's a whole sire/childe thing. And while I'm a part of their lives, they've been together for over a century...well, off and on. Plus, they're vampires and I'm not. I don't understand the way their minds think sometimes."

"Aren't you jealous?" Xander shook his head.

"Nothing to be jealous of. Their being together is sorta like when I'm upset about something humans would be upset about but vampires wouldn't give a second thought to or understand...I'll go to Cordy, Doyle or one of the gang. Or I'll call Willow, Tara or you. It's like that...well, except for the sex I'm sure they're having." Dawn and Xander both turned red. "I know I'm not explaining this right but I don't know how to describe it. I hate what happened to Spike....wish to God it had never happened. I can love him, be there for him when he's calmed down, support him but I can't understand how it really affected him. I've never been a vampire so I don't know what it was like for him to have that thing in his brain, stopping him from doing what vampires do. Angel can because of the curse. Do you understand?" Dawn nodded.

"It's like how I can talk to you and the gang about some things but I can't with mom or Buffy. Then there are some things I can talk to Buffy about but I can't talk to mom...that's if Buffy listens...and then there are things I can talk to them about that I couldn't talk to you....okay, I am babbling here." Xander put his arm around Dawn, preparing to head back to the door of the club.

"Babbling is good. If I can understand Willow then I can----" Xander stopped, his arm tightening around Dawn as he slowly reached for his stake. Eight vampires stood in between them and the door.

"Sorry guys, this is a private conversation. You need to take your little vamp meeting to another alley."

"No, we've got the right alley and the right person." Xander swallowed his fear as the vampires eyed him. He pushed Dawn behind him, her hands digging into his arms as she peered over his shoulder at the vampires.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" Xander sighed in relief when his hand wrapped around the stake. At least he had managed to stall them until he had a weapon. The relief left when he heard them start to growl. "I'm thinking this isn't going to be a nice little tete a tete. So what did I do to piss you off?"

"Who the fuck do you think you are boy?" One of the vampires advanced towards them.

"Uh, Xander."

"You think you're funny?" Xander shook his head.

"Nope, not trying to be. Was that a trick question?" Now the other vampires were joining the first one. This was so not good.

"It's not right...a master vampire giving his attention to a boy like you. A fucking human...not even a handsome one at that." Now Xander understood. They had been in the club, had seen Spike singing to him and they were jealous. A moment of pride surged through him before anger took over.

"Do I smell sour grapes? No wait, that's just your cheap cologne."

"We'll kill you...then master Spike will forget about you and..."

"Take up with one of you?" The vampires nodded, clearly pleased with their plan. Xander started to laugh. "What's so funny?"

"You are. As great as your plan may sound, it's never gonna work. First off, Spike would still have Angel and let's face it...none of you can begin to compare to either one of them. Fuck, you're not even worthy of licking their boots." More growls. "Secondly, even if they did want to replace me, it would never be with any of you. You're all butt-ugly." The growls were becoming louder. "Thirdly, if I don't kill you myself...."

"Angel and Spike will so kill you dead. They love Xander and they'd never let you get away with killing him." Dawn threatened them.

"Love a boy like him? Not likely." The vampires all started to laugh.

"Laugh it up while you can, assholes. Although Dawn made a good point, that's not what I was going to say. I was going to tell you that even if I don't kill you, my friends with the crossbows aimed at your hearts will. They're standing right behind you." Xander waited for the vampires to turn around, intending to attack while telling Dawn to run. However, that never happened. The vampires smiled at Xander's surprised expression.

"You really didn't think we were going to fall for that, did you?"

"I was hoping." Xander shrugged helplessly before whispering to Dawn. "Damn, that usually works."

"Now what?" Dawn's scared whisper reached his ears.

"I attack and you run. By the way, how loud can you scream?" Xander was hoping that between the noise of the fight and Dawn's screams for help, one of his friends would hear it above the loud music they had been playing while they were cleaning the club. He wasn't prepared for the shrill scream that pierced his eardrum. "I didn't mean right this second and in my ear, Dawnie."

"Sorry." Xander pushed the girl towards the door as he attacked the vampires. He heard Dawn's continued screams as he staked the first vampire. He saw one of the vampires prepare to swing and he ducked, reaching out to stake him. Before he could right himself, his arm was caught and held by two vampires as two more grabbed his other one. One of the vampires approached him as the other went after Dawn.

"Leave her alone! It's me you want." Xander struggled to get away while the vampire in front of him punched him in the face a few times. *Well, that was definitely not good.* Blood started pouring out of his nose, he was seeing stars and he was pretty sure he might have a broken nose or lost some teeth. He kicked out, knocking the approaching vampire backwards and was pleasantly surprised to hear the whoosh of the vampire being dusted. Xander was still having a hard time seeing, was still fighting the dizzy sensation but he knew his friends had heard the ruckus and had come to help them. He fell to the ground as the vampires started to fight with the others who had approached. Xander felt two strong arms come around him, holding him tight. Human arms. Warm arms. *Must be Oz, Wes or Doyle*. Silence filled the air as he leaned back into his friend's embrace.

"Did we win? Where's Dawnie?"

"She's alright. She ran into the club. Everything's okay, Xan. Told you I'd never let anything happen to you." Xander heard Lindsey's voice right before he passed out.

Tara's song was "When You Love Me" off of Martina McBride's "Martina"

Dawn and Cordy's song was "Celebrity" off of Brad Paisley's CD "Mud on the Tires".

Xander's bit was from "My Everything" off of 98 Degree's "Revelation"

Spike's song was "I Can't Help Falling In Love With You" sung by Elvis


Chapter Forty-One

Back to Index