Xander leaned against the door, trying to calm his anger. How dare Angel throw his past up in his face like that. And Spike could be so fucking infuriating sometimes. "Stupid vampires." Xander muttered. "See how they like sleeping without their 'warm human blanket' for a while." Xander sat down on the edge of the bed, deciding he was going to take a nap before moving his clothes into this bedroom.

"I don't think they'll like it."

"Damn straight. They'll be breaking that door down within the next 3 or 4 hours tops." Xander answered the voice before realizing it wasn't his inner voice unless he had turned into a girl. A girl? Xander turned to see Willow and Tara lying in the bed, both of them very naked. Willow was red faced but grinning while Tara smiled shyly, a slight blush on her face as she finished gathering the covers from the side of the bed. She covered herself and Willow while Xander jumped up, a very manly squeal of surprise coming from him as he covered his eyes. He started backing towards the door, his free hand seeking the door knob. "Oh shit. I'm soooo sorry. I didn't know you two were in here or I wouldn't have....okay, maybe I would have been tempted to watch the girl on girl sex because....no, I wouldn't because that would be wrong. And shame on me for even thinking it. My God, you're my best friend, Willow. I would never think of you like that."

"Why not? Is there something wrong with me?" Willow teased, trying to sound put out.

"No, no nothing at all. You're a very pretty woman. And so is Tara. Not that I think of Tara that way, Will. You two are together and I respect that....I've never, ever imagined what you two would look like together and naked...not that I would have to because I just got the visual, didn't I?" Xander was desperately trying to find the door knob. He heaved a sigh of relief when his hand finally found what he had been searching for . The relief didn't last for long when he realized he had locked it. "Shit, I locked the damn thing. Turning around, not looking." Xander tried to open the door but it wouldn't budge. He tried again, only managing to open it a little. "What the hell is wrong with this door?"

"Having problems, luv?" Spike's too innocent voice came from the other side of the barrier.

"Damnit, Spike. Open the fucking door."

"But you said you wanted to sleep in there."

"I changed my mind."

"What's the matter? Bed not comfy enough?" Angel asked, his voice as innocent as Spike's had been earlier.

"Angel-----"

"Is it too small for your liking? Or maybe you're lonely."

"Angel! Quit screwing around out there and open this damn door!"

"Think you got it backwards, luv. The screwing around is not going on out here."

"It's not going on in here either, Spike. Not anymore. Would you open the door like Xander asked? Tara and I would like to have a little bit of privacy." Willow yelled at the vampire, realizing Wesley must have removed the spell from around their room if they could hear them outside. She decided she was going to have a long talk with the man when this was over, not to mention Spike and Angel.

"I don't know if I want to open the door, Red. Xander pissed me off, acting like a two year old. Maybe he needs a time out." Willow rolled her eyes at Spike's antics. Suddenly a thought occurred to her and she winked at Tara before answering the blonde.

"Maybe you're right. Xander could use a time out and he needs to be taught a lesson. How about it, Xander? Are you up to finding out what girl, girl, guy sex is like?"

"What?! Willow...stop that. You're embarrassing Tara." Xander protested.

"No she's not." Tara told him.

"This bed is awfully big. I think three would fit don't you, Tara?"

"Sure, why not. I like what I see."

"I've always liked what Xander had to offer. Damn, construction work is good for the body." Xander let go of the door knob, putting his hands over his naked torso as best he could while mock glaring at his friend.

"Can't trick me, Red. I know you want the boy out of there as much as he wants to leave." Spike tried to sound sure of himself, but he wasn't quite getting there.

"You're wrong, Spike. I've always had a crush on Xander. Everyone knows that. I knew what was hiding under those baggy clothes. Come on, Xan. For old times sake. It's not like we haven't shared a bed before...several times. Only difference is----" Willow never finished her sentence, the door slamming open. Spike and Angel grabbed Xander, pulling him out of the room and quickly shutting the door behind them. Willow and Tara smiled at each other, both of them suppressing the laughter bubbling inside of them.

"Do you think they'll be back?" Tara asked as Willow began to caress her body. Willow stopped long enough to point at the knob, saying a few words before a light shone from it. The sound barrier was back in place along with the locked door no one could get through this time.

"Nope." She leaned down, giving her girlfriend a long, passionate kiss.

"I love magic." Tara sighed, forgetting about the interruption as Willow began where they had left off. ***************************************

Angel and Spike pulled Xander through their group of friends who had been standing around the bedroom door enjoying the show. They had made it halfway through the living room when Xander yanked his arms away, glaring at the room in general.

"How could you guys let me embarrass myself like that?"

"I tried to warn you Xander but you weren't listening." Dawn told him with a grin.

"Tell me something, Xander. Does Willow still have that cute little mole right behind----" Oz began.

"Shit, Oz! Not you too! That's my best friend you're talking about! I don't...I wouldn't...yeah, she does." Everyone but Xander, Angel and Spike laughed.

"I want to know when you and Red shared a bed."

"And exactly how many times is several?" Xander's mouth opened and closed several times as the two vampires studied their young lover.

"Uh...well...let's see...I think it was..." Xander began mentally ticking off all the times he and Willow had slept together as children, his fingers popping up one at a time. Spike and Angel were getting angry now. Why hadn't Xander ever told them about him and Willow being together? "Seven...maybe eight...I think it was eight."

"Eight times?" Xander jumped at the raised, angry voices of his lovers.

"Yeah. And why are you two yelling at me?"

"How come you never told us about you and Red? Have you slept with Buffy, too?" Xander's eyes widened, suddenly realizing what Angel and Spike were thinking.

"No! And I haven't done anything with Willow either. When we shared a bed we actually slept, okay? As in footie pajamas, stuffed animals and pillow fights." Angel and Spike relaxed at those words.

"Kinky." Everyone turned to stare at Dawn who was thoroughly enjoying the show. "Lots of drama, comedy, sex, hunky guys in their underwear and misunderstandings. This is better than Passions."

"I have to agree with you, Dawn." Cordelia decided to get in on the fun when she noticed how uncomfortable her friends were...well, Xander and Angel anyway. Spike was his usual confident self, enjoying the compliments and openly admiring stares from the girls, taking it all in stride now that he knew Xander and Willow had never been lovers.

"Cordelia, don't encourage Dawn like that. She's a young, impressionable girl." Wesley admonished, he and Doyle pushing the two girls towards the stairs as Oz followed. "I think there may be some work for us to do upstairs."

"Yeah, Princess didn't you say something earlier about having some invoices to type up?" Doyle asked, trying to get his girlfriend's attention away from the three barely dressed men. He knew Cordy loved him but that didn't mean he wanted her ogling their friends.

"Alright, I'm going." Cordelia and the others made their way up the stairs, Dawn's complaints about not working here being ignored by the others. When they were gone Spike crossed the room, opening the closet door and bending down to pick up a large package. He returned to his lovers, taking Xander's hand in his.

"Come on, Peaches. It's time." Angel nodded, understanding what Spike was doing.

"Time? Time for what? Guys...time for what?" Xander asked, neither one answering as they continued to make their way to the bedroom. **********************************

"Open it." Spike handed the gift to Xander who was now sitting on the edge of their bed. He sat down next to him, looking up as Angel came from locking the door to sit on the other side of their boy.

"What is this?" Xander asked, inspecting the package.

"What does it look like? It's our Christmas present to you. Well, one of them anyway."

"But Christmas isn't until the day after tomorrow."

"We know that but we want you to open this one now." Spike nudged Xander, trying to get him to open the gift. Xander turned to look at Angel who nodded.

"It might explain a few things." Xander took the bow off the present lovingly laying it on the nightstand before carefully peeling back the paper.

"Just rip it open, luv." Spike was getting impatient with Xander who shook his head. He finished taking the paper off the box and folded it up, laying it next to the bow.

"Xander, what are you doing?" Angel asked, watching the boy's slow and loving motions.

"I want to keep the paper and bow as a keepsake. This is the first Christmas gift you two have given me and I want to keep it as a memory of this moment." Angel and Spike shook their heads at the boy. Xander could be such a romantic sometimes.

"You'll have the gift as a memory, luv."

"Want to keep it all." Xander's voice was stubborn as he opened the lid of the box. He searched through the crepe paper before pulling out a framed sketch with writing on it and a book. He set the book to the side, his eyes never leaving the picture. It was sectioned off into four smaller sections. In the upper left corner there was a picture of Xander and Spike kissing. On the right upper corner was one of Angel and Xander kissing. On the bottom left corner was a picture of Angel and Spike kissing and in the bottom right corner, written in Spike's beautiful script were the words, 'The most eloquent silence; that of our mouths meeting in a kiss.'

"This is beautiful," Xander ran his hand across the pictures and writing, tears coming to his eyes. No one had taken such time to make him something like this since Willow knitted him that scarf in fifth grade. "The words are so...romantic and the pictures are gorgeous. Angel, how did you manage to draw yourself so perfectly? You can't look into a mirror...."

"I looked at some of the pictures you had taken of us. The one of you and Spike came from my memory. Who could forget such a lovely sight?" Angel looked at his two lovers with hunger.

"Thank you both so much. I'll cherish this forever. I want to hang it right over our bed. Can we?"

"Anywhere you want, pet. Anywhere at all." Xander put his arm around Angel's neck and pulled him in for a kiss. It was a long, slow, gentle kiss filled with love. When they parted both of them were breathing heavily. Xander turned, ready to reach for Spike who pulled him close before he could make his move. "My turn." This kiss was just as long, slow and gentle as the one with Angel and Xander squirmed on the bed, his cock painfully hard.

"Want you. Want both of you so much." Xander gasped at the cool touch to his throbbing erection. Angel had slid his hand into Xander's boxers and was caressing his cock. He moaned when Angel's thumb slid across the head, falling back on the bed and arching into the vampire's touch. Spike and Angel were equally hard, the sight of their oh so responsive lover spurring them on. Spike quickly shed his boxers, leaning down and giving Xander another kiss, this one hot and passionate. Another moan and their tongues were dancing with each other, each tasting the other as Xander pulled Spike closer, running his hands up and down the younger vampire's back.

Angel removed his own boxers before taking Xander's off, throwing both pairs next to Spike's. Spike nibbled Xander's ear, slowly making his way down his throat towards his chest while Angel was slowly nibbling his way up Xander's thigh. Xander was lost in the moment, threading his fingers through Spike's curls, pulling the vampire closer as his hips rose from the side of the bed urging Angel towards his already leaking erection. Almost simultaneously Spike reached the bandages on his chest while Angel hit the ones on his thighs. Almost immediately the passion was replaced with a burning desire to get away from his lover's touches.

"Don't...Spike, Angel please just stop." Angel glanced up at the boy, his hands firmly on Xander's thighs. Spike raised up, holding Xander's shoulders, an understanding look on his face. Both vampires knew what this was about but since Xander had said their names they knew he hadn't withdrawn completely.

"Xander, shhh, luv it's okay." Spike soothed, rubbing his fingers across Xander's shoulder. He could feel the tension in the boy's muscles, could smell the self-loathing, revulsion and fear eminating from him and at that moment he wished Gus was in front of him so he could torture the bastard again.

"But...no...it's not. I don't want you to touch me there."

"Because of the bites?" Angel voice was soft and comforting.

"Yeah. I...I want you so much...but I'm not willing to upset you. I know you can't stand touching me after...after.."

"Xander, we're touching you now," Angel gently ran his fingers across the bandage on Xander's left thigh. "See? I'm not angry with you or upset. All I feel is a burning hunger for your body, a need to touch you, to kiss you, to taste you." Angel's actions matched his words as he bent down, gently licking the pre-cum off Xander's hard shaft. Xander groaned as Angel took his cock into his mouth, lovingly licking along the underside while his hand came up to gently knead his balls.

"We can't stand NOT touching you, luv." Spike licked, nibbled and teased Xander's nipple. "There's nothing that could ever make us not want to make love to you. If you're not comfortable or don't want to then we'll-----" Spike's words were cut off when Xander gave him a soft, sweet kiss that sent waves of need through Spike's body.

"The most eloquent silence; that of our mouths meeting in a kiss." Spike was speechless, wondering how Xander could have memorized the words so quickly. "When it comes to us, I remember everything. Every word, every touch, every kiss." Xander's eyes glazed over as Angel's head began bobbing up and down more quickly, Xander's words having the same effect on him that they were on Spike. "Angel, oh yes, Angel...so good...gonna cum!" Spike continued to stare at Xander, not able to take his eyes off the beauty that was Xander lost in a moment of complete and utter ecstasy. He watched Xander's hips rise to meet Angel's mouth, watched Xander's finger's gripping the comforter, watched the look of pleasure on Xander's face as his body shuddered beneath Angel's touch and he felt another stronger wave of desire rip through his own body. As Angel continued to lick the cum from Xander's dick, the boy opened his eyes meeting Spike's darkened, lust filled blue ones. Xander tugged on his arm, guiding the vampire until Spike was straddling his chest. He gently stroked Spike's very hard erection, making the vampire moan.

"Want to taste you, Spike. Want to suck your dick while Angel fucks me." Xander glanced towards Angel, who smiled at those words, quickly reaching for the lube. When the first of Angel's fingers entered his body, Xander spread his legs wantonly, needing more. Angel understood and quickly prepared him, entering Xander in one smooth, gentle glide. "Yes, Angel, give me everything you have. Need this so much." Xander wrapped his legs around Angel's waist, pushing him further inside. Xander's hand stopped stroking Spike's cock, holding it at the base as he licked and nibbled every inch. Spike was swimming in a sea of desire, eyes closed as he leaned back onto Angel's chest. Angel kept one hand on Xander's hips, the other one coming around Spike to pinch and play with his hard nipple. Xander stopped what he was doing, looking at his lovers. "Kiss each other." Spike turned his head, meeting Angel's mouth. His arm wrapped around Angel's neck, drawing him into a more passionate kiss. "So beautiful. God, how did I get so lucky?" Xander watched them for another moment before taking Spike's cock into his mouth. He made a small ring with his mouth, hands pressing against Spike's ass, silently urging the vampire to fuck his mouth.

Spike wasted no time in following the unspoken command, his cock sliding in and out of the warmth of Xander's mouth while his tongue traced every inch of Angel's mouth. All three were caught up in the moment, the only sounds in the room being the slapping of flesh against flesh, the wet sound of Spike's cock slipping in and out of Xander's mouth and the groans and moans as they neared their completion. Spike was still kissing Angel, his hips thrusting in and out of Xander's mouth when he felt the boy's finger slide into his hole, gently wiggling inside of him until he found his prostate. Xander's finger rubbed back and forth over Spike's pleasure spot and it wasn't long before Spike was shooting his load into the boy's mouth, his scream of pleasure muffled by Angel's mouth. Xander drank eagerly, loving the taste of Spike. He continued to lick up and down the softening cock until Spike pulled out of him, and rolled over onto the bed. In one quick motion his mouth was on Xander's, tasting himself and Xander mixed together.

Xander kissed Spike, fingers playing with the vampire's hair while his other hand sought Angel's. Angel intertwined their fingers, softly kissing each one as he thrust in and out of Xander's ass. Angel changed his angle, hitting Xander's prostate with every movement as his hips pistoned forward and back. Xander pushed up, causing Angel to go deeper and both of them came at the same time. Spike felt Xander's scream against his lips and immediately broke the kiss, leaning down and catching the last of Xander's cum as it spurted from the boy's writhing body. Angel shot into Xander's hot, spasming channel, loving the feel of the clenching muscles against his throbbing cock.

"Oh, yes, Xander, baby...so warm, so hot for us. God, I love how you respond to our touches."

"Always, Angel...can't get enough of this. More, please, I need more." Angel and Spike exchanged glances, Angel pulling out of Xander, stopping to lick the semen off his chest before taking the position Spike had had earlier. Xander grabbed Angel's cock, stroking it back to life before greedily beginning to suck on the hard shaft. He teased the vampire, twisting his head as he sucked, causing Angel to hold the back of his head before thrusting inside the boy's mouth. Spike made his way to the side of the bed, going to his knees and licking along the cleft of Xander's ass. He gently held Xander's hips, thrusting his tongue into the warm channel, licking along the inside and gathering Angel's semen. The taste of his two lovers mixed together had him hard within moments. Spike lined his cock up to Xander's waiting hole and entered it, loving the way Xander's ass muscles seemed to suck him inside. Xander immediately pushed upwards, taking the vampire as deeply as he could. Spike rotated his hips, feeling for Xander's pleasure spot. When he found it, Spike started to piston in and out of Xander, the moaning and groaning beginning anew. They came at the same time, their orgasms wrung out of them at the sensation of climaxing together. This had never happened before and it seemed like hours before they were done. When it was over, Spike and Angel fell onto the bed, all three of them panting and looking thoroughly fucked.

"That was incredible." Angel managed to say, snuggling up to Xander. Spike did the same, putting his arm on top of Angel's.

"Bloody fucking amazing."

"Mmmmm." Both vampires raised their heads to stare at Xander.

"That was one of the most incredible bouts of lovemaking we've had and all you can say is mmmmm?" Spike asked.

"Mouth's kinda tired." Xander pointed at his swollen lips, taking in the concerned looks on his lover's faces. "But in a good way." Spike and Angel leaned in, both of them kissing a corner of Xander's lips. As they pulled away, they saw their boy was already falling asleep. Spike got up and went to the bathroom, coming back with a wet cloth. Angel had risen also, picking Xander up and turning him around to lay him in the center of the bed. They cleaned themselves up before doing the same to Xander who had already fallen asleep, a smile on his face. After joining Xander, they covered themselves up, snuggling into the warmth of their human lover.

"Never got around to the book." Spike pointed out. Angel nodded.

"We'll talk to him about it when we wake up." Those were the last words spoken before sleep engulfed them as well. **************************************

Xander stood in the middle of the apartment, his arms wrapped around himself as he watched the lights twinkle on the Christmas tree. He had awoken a few hours ago which had turned out to be the next morning. He had quietly slipped out of the bed, careful not to awaken his lovers who had mumbled something and then gone back to sleep. Xander had taken a shower, quickly getting dressed before joining his friends in the office. They had spent a couple of hours laughing and talking, the Sunnydale high school friends talking about old times while Doyle and Dawn had listened, Wesley occasionally adding his tales of his time in Sunnydale.

All the talk of their times together had made Xander miss Buffy, Giles and Joyce as well. Hell, he even missed his parents and how unbelievable was that? Oz had taken Willow, Tara and Dawn to see Dawn's father so they could exchange gifts. Dawn wasn't that excited about seeing her father and Xander could understand the girl's feelings. In all the time he had known Buffy, he had only seen the man once. Anyone who could leave such a wonderful woman as Joyce and two beautiful daughters like Buffy and Dawn did not rank high on Xander's list of people he would like. Xander had pulled Willow to the side, asking for Riley's number in Iowa. It had taken a lot of 'puppy dog' looks to get his best friend to finally relinquish the number. She was afraid they would argue, thus ruining both of her friend's holidays but Xander had promised her that was not going to happen. Wesley and Doyle had gone to meet a client who was going to pay them and Cordelia had left to meet the caterer who would be making their Christmas dinner, leaving Xander in charge of the office. After half an hour had passed, Xander had gotten bored and closed up. He knew he would catch hell from Cordelia but he didn't want anything to come between him and his family having a nice, quiet Christmas.

Xander had crept into the bedroom, picking up the picture Angel and Spike had given him and the book he had failed to even look at. He had flipped through the pages, coming upon a few which had been marked. He realized the text was about claiming and he had spent an hour reading through it. From what he could understand claimed humans were few and far between and never had one been claimed by two master vampires. He had smiled at that, picturing himself as being famous, having his picture in some old, worn out dusty book in the watcher's council's library hundreds of years from now until he remembered what the council had done to Buffy on her 18th birthday. No, there would be no notoriety of any kind if Xander had anything to say about it.

Xander had been excited when he read how over time he would become stronger, have quicker reflexes, faster to heal...that was a biggie considering how many times he had been knocked around by demons... and have better night vision. Xander couldn't decide whether he was happy about living longer or not. On the one hand it gave him more time with Spike and Angel, but on the other he would most likely outlive all his friends. He didn't know if he could go through losing them, especially Willow...not after Jesse.

Thinking about losing his friends had led him to think about Gunn and Alana. He hoped they were alright. Xander felt badly for the two of them, not only because they had lost their little brother but also because they had no home, no food unless they stole it and no money. Xander had decided to call David and see if there was some way they could help Gunn and his friends. After talking for half an hour they had come up with some ideas. David was going to arrange for some food, bedding and other essentials such as soap, towels, etc. to be delivered to the homeless kids. Xander had told him where to find the warehouse, warning David to approach the kids with caution because they didn't like strangers. Xander had promised to pay the man back but David had refused saying he could write it off his taxes. Xander knew David better than that. He was helping because he wanted to and he could.

They had also discussed the delivery of Xander's presents for the gang. David had told him the truck would follow him when he came for the celebration they were having tonight. It would stay parked out of sight until they left for Caritas, then the drivers would unload the gifts while they were gone. Xander had made David promise not to look at his present and his heart went out to the man when he seemed so pleased to be getting one. Money definitely wasn't the key to happiness. David had asked if he could bring Anya along and Xander had agreed, hoping that Spike and Angel wouldn't get upset. How could he refuse after David had been so great about everything else? Besides, Xander liked to think that he and Anya were still friends.

Friends. That brought him back to why he was now standing in the middle of the room, wondering if he should call Buffy, Giles and Joyce. He didn't want to spoil their holidays by making them mad but he couldn't stand the thought of Christmas coming and going without speaking to them either. He pulled the phone number out of his pocket and hesitantly dialed the number, fingers shaking with nervousness. Xander hated the fact that he was scared to call two people who had been such a big part of his life. He sat back, running his hand through his hair as he waited for someone to answer. After three rings a woman's voice answered.

"Hello and Merry Christmas. This is the Finn residence."

"Uh...hello...um, is Joyce there?" Xander went with the one person he knew would accept his call. He knew he was being a coward but he figured Joyce would know whether Buffy would talk to him or not.

"Why yes she is. May I ask who's calling?"

"Tell her it's Xander." A couple of minutes went by as Xander heard the woman's muffled voice yelling for Joyce.

"Xander? Is something wrong with Dawn?" Joyce's voice was full of concern.

"No, she's fine. Willow, Tara and Oz took her over to her Dad's house for the afternoon. I'm so sorry I scared you like that. I just...I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas and tell you...thatImissyouandloveyou." Xander finished, a flush of red in his cheeks. He had never told Joyce he loved her but he did and he wanted her to know that. Joyce's laughter was like music to his ears.

"I'm not really good with the babble speak you and Willow seem to do so well but I think I understood you. Merry Christmas to you, Xander. And I love and miss you too."

"You do? I mean of course you do since we haven't seen each other in a while...not that I think you sit around missing me all the time cause I'm sure you're staying busy with the art gallery, Dawn and Buffy and Giles and housework and stuff. How is your yard?"

"Xander, sweetie it's okay. I know what you meant and I do miss you. And not because of the way you kept my yard so nice. I miss having you around. You always know how to make me laugh even on my worst days. Sunnydale hasn't been the same since you left. Everyone is much too serious and there's not nearly enough laughter these days. I miss hearing you kids laughing and talking in the living room while I worked around the house." Xander's eyes filled with tears and he quickly blinked them away. It was silly to cry over someone giving you a compliment wasn't it?

"Speaking of us kids is Buffy around?"

"Yes. She's in the living room with Giles, Riley and his parents. Do you want to speak to her?" *Oh, God how he wanted to speak to her.*

"Do you think she'll talk to me? Will it upset her or make her mad because if it will I'll hang up now and you can tell her it was Willow calling to say everything was fine with the Dawnster."

"To tell you the truth, I don't know the answer to either question. How about I ask her. You never know until you try."

"Okay." Xander waited and waited and waited some more. He was just about to give up hope when Buffy's voice came over the line.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Buff. How's Christmas in Iowa?" Xander tried to keep his voice light, but his stomach was doing nervous flip flops.

"Great. Riley's parents are really nice and everyone seems to be getting along. How are Willow, Tara and Dawn?" Xander couldn't help but notice that Buffy hadn't asked about him, Angel or any of the others.

"Fine. They're visiting your Dad right now."

"What fun." Buffy's voice was full of sarcasm. "I told them they should come with us instead of going to Los Angeles. We've gone sledding and skiing. There's been Christmas dances galore. They would have had a lot more fun here."

"I think they're having fun." Xander tried not to sound defensive.

"Really? What have they been doing?"

"Well, they went shopping with Cordy, Doyle, Oz and Wesley, we trimmed the tree and sang Christmas carols, they went shopping with Cordy again and...oh, tonight we're going to a karoake place our friend Lorne owns."

"Sounds exciting. Funny, I haven't heard you say anything about you taking them out somewhere. What's the matter? Been too busy with your boyfriends and your new family to think about your old one?"

"No. We've been busy fighting vampires and trolls and----"

"Xander, why did you call?"

"I just wanted to tell you, Giles and Joyce Merry Christmas and..."

"Thanks. I'll be sure to tell Giles what you said. Is that all?"

"Yeah, I guess that's all." Xander sighed, resigned to the fact that Buffy hadn't forgiven him yet. No, he wasn't going to give up that easily. "Except....well, I made you, Giles and Joyce something for Christmas. A friend of mine is having the presents shipped to your house as soon as you get back from----"

"Don't bother. I don't want anything from you Xander and neither does Giles."

"Buffy, quit being so damn stubborn. How long are you going to stay mad at me?"

"How does forever sound?" Xander opened his mouth to answer but it was too late. He heard the dial tone and realized Buffy had hung up on him. He stared at the phone for a few minutes, tears sliding down his cheeks. Finally, he dialed another number, muttering to himself as he did so.

"God, I'm a glutton for punishment. That or I really am stupid."

The phone rang five or six times before he heard his dad's voice. "Harris residence."

"Hey, dad it's me. I just called to say Merry Christmas."

"Who is this?" Xander shook his head.

"Xander. Geez, dad how many kids do you have?"

"One too many."

"Nice to hear. Love you, too. Is mom around?"

"Your mother hasn't been here for almost a month. She's living with that fat cousin of hers."

"Carol?"

"Yeah."

"Dad, what happened? Why did mom move out? Did you hurt her?" Xander's voice rose with anger at the thought of his dad hitting his mother.

"There you go. Always blaming me. I didn't touch her. You want to find out what happened call your mother." Xander heard the click of the phone as his father hung up on him. He laid the phone down, quickly taking his wallet out of his pocket and searching through it for the list of numbers he had for his family. Xander had never found any use for them except an occasional call to borrow a tuxedo or to see if his dad was holed up drunk at someone's house. He punched in the numbers, waiting for someone to answer.

"Hello?"

"Cousin Carol? This is Xander. Is my mom there?"

"Xander, how nice to hear from you. How is Los Angeles?"

"Great. Is mom there?"

"Yeah, she's here. Tell me Xander, are there any handsome, available men in L.A?"

"Tons. Can I please speak to my mom?" Xander's nerves were on edge, Carol's screeching voice on the other end not helping.

"Jessica! Jess...it's Xander. He wants to talk to you." Xander waited for his mom's voice, his leg bouncing nervously.

"Xander?"

"Hey, mom. I called the house to wish you and dad a Merry Christmas and he told me you had moved out. What's wrong?"

"What's wrong is I finally realized I'm an alcoholic and so is your father. Tony wouldn't go for help but I did. I'm tired of drinking my life away, tired of messing my life up and most of all I'm tired of being a bad person."

"Don't say that mom. You're NOT a bad person."

"Yes, I was Xander. And do you know what the worst part of it is? I've missed you growing up. I can't remember what you looked like when you went to your prom, I didn't go to your graduation----"

"Glad you didn't mom. Graduation was...uh...really screwed up. Lots of weird things, people screaming...it was definitely not fun."

"Still, I should have been there." There was a moment of silence before Jessica asked, "Are you still living in Los Angeles with those two men?"

"Angel and Spike. Yeah, I am. Does that bother you? Having a bi- sexual son?"

"No. I was surprised at first and I know I didn't handle the news very well but it they love you and they treat you good that's all that matters. Do they?"

"Yes, mom. Angel and Spike are the best thing that's ever happened to me. They protect me, they love me despite all my faults and they even make me eat my vegetables." Jessica laughed at those words.

"If they can get you to eat anything healthy then they must be very special. Too bad I didn't take the time to get to know them when you were here."

"Maybe you could come to L.A. for a visit. We could show you the sights and Cordy could take you shopping."

"I'd love that, Xander. It's going to have to wait a while though. I'm still going through the 12 step program...it might be a few months. Can I call you sometimes? I'd like to keep in touch...that is, if you want me to."

"Of course I want you to. Mom, I hated leaving things the way they were between us but I had to get away. I couldn't take the constant arguing and the hitting. I was afraid if I stayed there any longer Dad or I would end up dead."

"I know. It was the right thing to do. It's too bad it took you leaving and Joyce giving it to me with both barrels for me to understand just how much I've hurt you. I'm so sorry for everything." Xander's eyes filled with tears, his mother sounding like herself for the first time in way too many years.

"It's okay, mom. I'm glad you're getting help." Xander thought for a moment. "Did you say Joyce talked to you?"

"Talked isn't the right word." Jessica laughed and Xander thought it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard. "She came over one day and told me in no uncertain terms what a terrible mother I was, what a wonderful son I had despite the way he was raised and how I should be ashamed for running you off."

"Mom, it wasn't just you....there were a lot of things going on in Sunnydale that I couldn't live with."

"Still, she made me see I played a part in your leaving. I'm so glad she got through to me. Joyce has been a God send. She took me to the hospital...got me started on rehabilitation and she's even sponsoring me. I don't know what I would have done without her."

"Joyce is special." Xander agreed.

"Joyce is the kind of mother that you deserved, Xander. The kind of mother that I want to be from now on...if you'll let me."

"Of course I will. You're my mother. I love you...I always have." Xander heard Jessica begin to cry and wished he could climb through the telephone lines, take her into his arms and comfort her. "Don't cry, mom. Please don't."

"I can't help it. I was so afraid I had lost you for good. I was afraid you would tell me it was too late, that I should have protected you from your father, that I should have left him a long time ago and spared us both a lot of pain."

"Mom, you tried. You protected me when I was little, remember? I just wish I could have done the same for you." Now Xander was crying, feeling connected to his mother for the first time in a long time.

"You did, sweetheart. That's what most of your arguments with Tony were about...me."

"Does this mean you're divorcing dad? Have you left him for good."

"I don't know. Xander, I don't expect you to understand but I still love your father. I know Tony hasn't been himself for quite a few years but there are times when I look at him and I see the man I married. He wasn't always the way he is now. Do you remember how good a man he was once upon a time?"

"Barely. I remember some good times when he taught me how to play baseball....or the barbecues we used to have with Jesse, Willow and their parents."

"Yes, those were good times. Speaking of Willow, how is she? I'm sure she's enjoying her visit. I bet she's looking forward to spending Christmas with you and watching you do your 'Snoopy Dance'." Xander's jaw dropped.

"You knew about the 'Snoopy dance'?"

"I used to sneak into the living room and watch you do it for Willow. You were both so cute."

"Did Willow know about all of this?" Xander couldn't believe that Willow would be able to keep this a secret from him.

"No, Willow has no idea. I told Joyce not to tell her...I love the girl but she never could keep a secret when it came to you. All you had to do was turn those big, brown eyes of yours on her and she was putty in your hands. Joyce told me Willow, Tara and Dawn were spending Christmas with you."

"Joyce didn't tell me any of this...I just talked to her."

"I asked her not to. I wanted to be the one to tell you. Joyce gave me the number and I was going to call you when I was sure I was able to handle not drinking anymore. I didn't want to get your hopes up in case I couldn't do this. I didn't want to disappoint you again. But it's going well and I've made a lot of new friends."

"That's great, mom. I'm happy for you."

"I only wish I could help Tony the way Joyce helped me."

"Mom, I hate to burst your bubble but I don't think dad's ever gonna change. I wish he would...."

"Never say never, Xander. I changed. Maybe he will too."

"Maybe. Mom, I'm sorry I didn't give you my number. Guess I'm not the best son in the world, huh?" Xander's voice was filled with shame.

"Yes, you are. You were always a good son. Don't ever doubt that. It's your parents who weren't good enough for you."

"That's not true. You've always been good enough for me. I wouldn't trade you for anyone else in the world...not even Joyce." Xander was surprised to find that he was telling the truth. Even though he had thought that at times, his mother had been good to him for a time, had even taken beatings that were meant for him. He heard his mother start to cry again. "Mom, don't cry unless those are happy tears."

"They are. It's so nice to be able to talk to you like this."

"Mom, are you going to be okay during the holidays? It's got to be hard being away from your family and Joyce is in Iowa---"

"I have a couple of friends who are filling in for Joyce while she's away. Don't worry so much, Xander. I've got a great support team from the hospital where I attend AA meetings. We're having a party tonight as a matter of fact. I can't wait to get out for a while. Speaking of that, I need to be getting ready and I'm sure your friends are planning something special for you."

"Okay. I better let you go. Mom, I'm sorry but I didn't get you a present."

"Yes, you did. This is it. You're giving me a second chance to be your mom and there's nothing you could have bought me that would compare to that. Besides, with everything that's been going on I wasn't able to get you one either."

"Like you said...this is it. I'm so proud of you, mom....and I love you."

"I love you too." Jessica hung up and Xander put the phone on the table before looking heavenward and mouthing 'thank you'. He put his head in his hands and began to sob. It was a miracle. A Christmas miracle. *******************************************************************

Angel and Spike stepped out of the bedroom, both of them shocked to see Xander alone and sobbing uncontrollably on the couch. They had awoken earlier, taking a shower and getting dressed before going to find their boy. They rushed over to him, Spike kneeling in front of him as Angel slipped in beside him on the couch. Xander's head raised, his eyes red from crying, tears still spilling down his cheeks.

"Xander, what happened? What's got you so upset?" Angel asked, stroking the boy's back in a soothing gesture.

"You've been reading the book haven't you? The part about claiming?" Spike asked, catching sight of the book and picture lying next to Xander on the couch. Xander nodded. "Xander, if it bothers you that much we won't do it." Spike had Xander's hands in his, his thumbs gently rubbing circles. Xander opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by Wesley and Doyle entering the living room.

"Well, Cordy should be happy. We managed to collect money from all three clients so---" Doyle's voice trailed off as he took in the sight of his three friends. "Wesley, maybe we should go back upstairs and let---"

"No. Stay. I think we may need your help, especially yours Wesley." Spike picked the book up, tossing it to Wesley. Wesley opened it up, eyes widening at the text. Both men sat down in the chairs next to the couch.

"Xander, I can imagine you must be overwhelmed at the idea of being claimed by both Spike and Angel, however, I must assure you that we've discussed this and---"

"You two talked to Wesley about this behind my back? Before you even asked me?" Xander's voice was a mixture of surprise and anger. "How could you?"

"We wanted to make sure we were right about the effect our blood would have on you," Spike explained, throwing an agitated glance Wesley's way.

"But you told me not to believe everything the watcher's council had documented about vampires. That I was supposed to learn everything from you two." Xander argued.

"That's true. We did. But vampires don't keep documentation of things they do, so we went to Wesley for the book. You've read it so you know there's been few vampires who have taken a human consort and there's never been two vampires who have claimed the same person. As much as Spike and I love you, as much as we want this, we couldn't ask you without making sure you would be alright. We didn't talk behind your back..." Xander stared at Angel for a moment..."okay, we did but we were just looking out for you, baby. Please don't be angry." Xander looked from one vampire to another, both of them wearing very concerned faces, before grinning.

"I should use this moment to make you two grovel at my feet....beg me for my forgiveness and promise lots of make up sex..cause I know there probably won't be many golden opportunities like this but I can't...I'm too happy right now." Spike and Angel exchanged confused looks as Xander laughed. "Bet you weren't expecting that, huh?"

"Never know what to expect with you, luv." Spike grinned, pushing the curl back from Xander's forehead before giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek. "That's one of the reasons we love you so much...you keep us on our toes."

"Glad to hear it. If we're going to spend the rest of our lives together I don't want to be boring or predictable. Wouldn't want you two getting tired of me, in or out of the bed."

"That will never happen." Angel hugged Xander, planting small kisses over the boy's tear streaked face. Xander turned, catching Angel's mouth with his own. It was a long, hot, passionate kiss and when it was over Xander sat back, a satisfied smile on his face as he saw the desire in Angel's eyes. He turned his attention to Spike, crooking his finger in a 'come here' gesture. Spike sat up, leaning forward, his body between Xander's legs, hands on each thigh. Xander put his arms around Spike's neck.

"What about you, blondie? Think you can put up with me for that long?" Spike's answer was a slow, toe-curling kiss. Xander put one hand on the small of Spike's back, pulling the vampire's body closer to his while the other played with his hair. Spike's hands moved up Xander's thighs until his thumbs were rubbing along each side of Xander's hardening cock. Xander groaned, leaning his head back on the couch as Spike nibbled along his jaw, down his neck and along his chest where Xander's shirt lay open, showing exposed chest. Angel joined in, putting his arm around Spike while his mouth captured Xander's in another warm kiss.

Wesley and Doyle stared at the three men for a few moments before exchanging glances. "We'll just be....oh, yeah," Doyle muttered as he and Wesley got up, ready to make their escape. They came to a stop when they heard giggling coming from the doorway. Both of their faces turned red at the sight of their friends.

"Voyeurs, much," Cordelia stated, trying to glare at her boyfriend but finding it hard not to laugh at his embarrassment.

"No, darlin' it wasn't like that. See, Wesley and I came down here and Xander was upset----" Doyle began.

"Oh, I've known Xander since we were three and that's not how he acts when he's sad." Willow pointed out, smiling at her friend who was seated between his two vampires, a very happy and contented expression on his face.

Angel was smiling and Spike was smirking as Doyle and Wesley tried to explain to their friends what had happened, neither of them offering any help.

"But he was. And we offered to leave but Spike asked us to stay and help..."

"How? By taking notes?" Cordy asked.

"I hope they were taking pictures cause that was hot." Dawn chimed in, eyes still on the three sitting on the couch.

"What? No, no, we most certainly were not taking pictures." Wesley had finally found his voice. "Spike needed my help..."

"Didn't look like it to me." Oz couldn't help getting in on the fun. "He seemed to have the situation well in hand."

"Yes, quite. Umm, Spike would you like to tell them what happened?" Wesley turned beseeching eyes on Spike.

"No, mate you go ahead. You and Doyle seem to be doing okay." Wesley glared at Spike while Doyle continued to shift uncomfortably under Cordelia's stare. Finally, he held up his hand, showing her the checks he and Wesley had gotten while they were out.

"I've got money, princess."

"You were paying to watch?" Cordelia was not ready to let Doyle off the hook just yet.

"NO!"

"I'd pay to watch," Dawn winked at Xander, Spike and Angel.

"DAWNIE!" The girls chorused.

"Well, I would. And if you guys were truthful about it, you know you would too." She smiled at the reactions on everyone's faces, none of them saying a word. Spike lit a cigarette, sitting back with his arm around Xander to enjoy his friend's embarrassment.

"Niblet's got a point." Dawn's grin grew at Spike's words. Angel finally decided it was time to help Wesley and Doyle and he wanted to find out what or who had made Xander cry.

"Wesley and Doyle are telling the truth. Spike and I found Xander sitting out here...very upset...and they were trying to help." Angel didn't mention the crying part, knowing his lover hated for people to see him so emotional. "You never told us what was going on." Willow really looked at her friend, noticing his red rimmed eyes, the tear streaks that were still on his face and saw him glance at the phone. Without another word, she was across the room, pulling a chair in front of him and sitting down, her face filled with concern. She was afraid she knew what had happened and was berating herself for giving him the number in the first place.

"You called Buffy didn't you?" Xander nodded and the room became quiet, none of the earlier teasing and happiness there any longer. Spike cursed under his breath, stubbing his cigarette out angrily. *That bitch could suck the life out of a room without even being present*.

"Why?" Spike's simple question made Xander turn to look at his lover, noticing the angry set of his jaw.

"Don't be mad, Spike. I had to. Buffy's been my friend for too long...I couldn't let Christmas come and go without at least trying to talk to her. Besides, I wanted to talk to Giles and Joyce, too." Spike saw the pain in Xander's eyes and gave his lover a warm hug, trying to show the boy that he wasn't mad at him. Everyone else took a seat, waiting to hear what had happened.

"I'm not mad at you, luv. I just think it was a bad idea, that's all."

"I have to agree with Spike." Angel told him, gently rubbing Xander's arm. He knew how stubborn and jealous Buffy could be, especially when it came to him. He remembered the time Buffy had found him and Cordelia sharing a coffee at the Bronze. She hadn't said much but Angel had known she was angry. Sharing a cup of coffee with Cordy was nothing compared to what the three of them had and Angel had no misgivings that it would be a long time before Buffy would forgive Xander. Cordelia and Buffy had never been close while Buffy and Xander had and he knew the girl would consider Xander a backstabber at the very least.

"I know. You're both right." Xander conceded before looking at Willow. "You tried to warn me Will, but I wouldn't listen." Willow took his hand, patting it.

"What did she say?"

"Nothing much. Just that you, Tara and Dawn should have listened to her and gone with them to Iowa instead of coming here to see me. Buffy said she tried to warn you guys that I would be too busy with my boyfriends to pay any attention to you and maybe she was right. God, Willow, I haven't spent that much time with any of you...I'm so sorry."

"Honey, you have no reason to be sorry. There's been trolls and vampires...other than that, we've had a great time. I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else but here with you. You know that. Besides, we're spending tonight and all day tomorrow together, right?" Xander nodded. "What else did she say?" Willow knew her friends well enough to know that there was more to it than that.

"That forever seemed like too soon to forgive me and thatshedidn'twantmypresentandneitherdidGiles." The last part was really hard for Xander to say. He couldn't, wouldn't believe that Buffy would never forgive him, what hurt was the fact that neither she or Giles would accept what he had worked so hard to make for them.

"Buffy's just being stubborn, Xander. She'll forgive you." Willow tried to soothe Xander's feelings while Angel, Spike and the rest of the AI gang seethed.

"Xander hasn't done anything to be forgiven for...not this time. Buffy forgave him for the lie but now she won't forgive him for falling in love? That's totally ignorant. You can't help who you fall in love with...it just happens." Cordelia stated, pissed as hell.

"I agree, Cordy but we both know how Buffy felt about Angel." Willow tried to smooth things over. "She always thought of him as hers, whether they could be together or not."

"Didn't stop her from going out and snatching up Captain Cardboard did it?" Spike asked. "What was Angel supposed to do? Sit around and brood for her Buffiness while she went around shagging Riley and bragging about it?"

"Spike---" Xander shook his head, gesturing towards Dawn.

"It's okay, Xander. I feel the same way Cordy and Spike do. I think Buffy's being a total ass about this. I love my sister but she has a tendency to put her feelings above other people's...even family and friends. Since you left, she's been worse. All Buffy does is hang out with Riley, Graham and some of the other ex-commandos. She had no right saying anything about how much time you've spent with Willow, Tara and me. You've paid more attention to me in the past few days than Buffy has for months now.

"Dawn, don't---" Tara began, seeing the hurt look on Willow's face. She knew what Dawn was saying was true but she didn't like to see how much it hurt her girlfriend.

"She's right, Tara. I don't like to admit it but Buffy has changed. It's like we don't even exist for her anymore now that Riley and the others are around." Xander saw the pain on Willow's face and pulled her towards him, taking her in his arms. He held her close, stroking her hair as she started to cry.

"Shh, Will don't cry. If Buffy can't see how special you are then it's her loss. You've always been a good friend. Hell, I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been in my life."

"I wasn't there for you when---"

"No, not looking back. What's done is done." Xander wiped the tears from Willow's face. "We've both gone through the hero worship thing with Buffy. And none of us are totally blameless. We set her up on this pedestal, never expecting her to be human and make mistakes. We've figured out that she does. Trouble is, we've created a monster." Willow smiled at that. "Buffy believes what we were telling her and now she doesn't recognize a mistake when she sees it. She doesn't think she can do anything wrong."

"So how do we stop the monster we've created, Dr. Frankenstein?"

"Buffy's going to have to stop herself. The day will come when she'll realize just how much her life sucks without us in it. When that happens we'll agree with her, forgive her and go back to being friends, only this time it will be different. No pedestals, no following her blindly without any thoughts of our own. Buffy steps out of line, we'll let her know and she'll do the same for us...just like we do for each other."

"Xander, did you get to talk to mom?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah. Joyce is a special lady. She gave me the one Christmas present I thought I would never get."

"What's that, luv?" Spike asked.

"My mom."

"Huh?"

"After I talked to Buffy and Joyce I decided to call home and wish my parents a Merry Christmas." Xander smiled at the surprised looks on his friend's faces. "I know...it was stupid. Anyway, my dad answered and was his usual jolly self. After not knowing who I was when I called him dad he finally remembered...told me my mom wasn't living there anymore."

"I didn't know that," Willow looked worried. "Where is she and how come she moved out. Is she divorcing your dad?"

"Mom doesn't know what she's going to do about dad. She's moved in with our cousin Carol for the time being. But the good news is, she's a recovering alcoholic. That's right boys and girls I said recovering as in stopping, quitting, giving it up..." Xander's smile seemed to brighten the entire room and everyone was grinning back, happy at the news and Xander's reaction. "And it's all because of Joyce."

"Mom? What did she do?" Dawn asked.

"Seems after I left Sunnydale someone told her about my parents and their drinking habits." Xander cast a sideways glance at Willow who bowed her head and blushed.

"It sorta slipped out. I was mad because you were gone, Joyce and I were talking about it and I was venting. Damn it, Xander you know how I get when I vent. I can be really....rough. Sometimes I don't know my own strength when it comes to venting."

"It's okay, Willow. If I knew telling Joyce about mom and dad would accomplish this I'd have told her a long time ago."

"No you wouldn't have, pet. Never have been good with your own pain. You're great at supporting your friends through their crises but when it comes to yours...close mouthed...a fucking crowbar couldn't pry it out of you."

"Well, anyway, Joyce went to see mom and from what she said Joyce really laid into her. Told her what a bad mother she'd been, how she couldn't understand how such a good kid could from where I lived," Xander blushed, the words warming his heart. "Mom got pissed at first but she said Joyce kept coming back...she finally broke through and when mom asked for help she took her to the hospital. They put her on the 12 step program, Joyce is her sponsor and she's been alcohol free for almost a month now." Xander's voice was filled with pride. "Will, she sounded just like my mom...before the drinking. Remember the barbecues?" Willow nodded. "She told me she was sorry for missing my childhood, my prom, my graduation...."

"Did you mention how graduation totally sucked?" Cordy asked.

"Yeah, I did. She was actually talking to me, asking me to forgive her and she even said...she said...." Xander's eyes filled with tears, his voice breaking as he put his head in his hands. He had to get himself under control. His friends were watching and he didn't want them to see...oh, hell they were his friends. They'd understand. He raised his head, seeing the caring and love in their eyes and it choked him up worse. Angel and Spike both had their arms around him while Willow held his hands. After a few minutes he continued. "She told me I had always been a good son, that they didn't deserve a son like me....guys, she told me she loved me. Can you believe that? And mom was laughing and talking and I could hear the old her, the one I've wanted back for years."

"That's terrific, Xander. I'm so happy for you." Willow gave her friend a hug which was hard to do considering Angel and Spike had their arms wrapped protectively around Xander.

"I'm worried she'll slip up and fall off the wagon, especially if my dad has anything to say about it, but I can't help but feel good you know. At least she's trying. Mom even promised to come for a visit when the program is finished. She wants to get to know you two better. She's accepted the fact that I live with two men...especially since I told her how you protected me and made me eat my vegetables and loved me. It's okay if mom comes for a visit, right?"

"Of course it is, baby. I'd like to get to know your mother...the real one."

"Well, this calls for a celebration. Is everyone ready to go to Caritas? Have some fun?"

"Can it wait a minute, Doyle? I have something I want to tell Angel and Spike and I think you guys should be here when I do." Xander turned to his lovers. "I know this should be a private thing, but I've made up my mind about the claiming and I want everyone to know what's going on."

"Fair enough." Angel agreed. "Spike and I want to claim Xander which basically means----"

"You'll be married." Willow interrupted. "You three will exchange blood and leave your marks on each other. Xander will be stronger, faster and adopt some vampire traits such as good vision at night, faster healing and living longer but he won't actually be a vampire, right?" Everyone but Oz and Xander stared at her in shock, not believing she knew all of this. "What? I snuck into Giles' office and read the texts he didn't want us to see, okay? I've confessed. Is everyone happy now?"

"That depends, Red."

"On what?"

"On whether or not Xander's going to agree." Everyone turned their attention to Xander who shifted uncomfortably.

"I want to do it but I don't know if I can." Xander gestured towards the others in the room. "Because of our family. As much as I love both of you, as much as I would love to spend eternity with you, I don't know if I could handle losing all of them. It was hard enough watching Jesse...I don't know if I'm strong enough to go through that over and over again."

"Xand, you can't think like that." Willow squeezed her friend's hand. "No one knows from one day to the next what's going to happen. Anyone in this room could die tonight, even Spike and Angel...well, technically they are dead but you know what I mean. No one here is really immortal. You have to go with your heart on this one. What's it telling you to do?"

"It's screaming at me to say yes. It's telling me I want this more than I've ever wanted anything in my entire life."

"That's a yes then?" Spike asked, getting impatient.

"It's a yes." Spike kissed Xander long and hard, Angel doing the same as their friends cheered.

"Who would have thought that Xander would be the first one to get married." Cordelia shook her head. "So are we invited?"

"Uh, Cordelia it's not like that. Although we could have a party of some kind." Willow told her.

"Why can't we be at the ceremony?" Willow gave her a look that clearly told her why not. "Oh....oh, I get it now. Okay, so party afterwards?"

"I think that could be fun." Angel smiled, nodding his head. "What about you guys?"

"Always up for a party." Spike agreed.

"You're up for anything, Spike." Xander told him, blushing when everyone started to laugh. "Get your minds out of the gutters...I didn't mean it that way."

"So are we ready to go out and celebrate now?" Doyle asked.

"Just a moment. As happy as we all are for Xander, Spike and Angel I think it would be best if this news was kept a secret from the outside world. You see, there have only been a handful of humans that have been claimed by a vampire. There is no record of any human being mated with two master vampires. If word were to get out, I'm afraid there might be a few people who would view Xander as quite remarkable. They might want to...study him. Speaking from experience, I know the watcher's council would be anxious to speak to Xander."

"Is that a nice way of saying they'd want to experiment on me?"

"Yes." Angel and Spike looked worried even as their low growling became apparant.

"Down boys." Xander hugged his boyfriends. "Everything will be okay. We're the only ones who know about this and besides, the watcher's council is all the way over in England."

"Wolfram and Hart are right across town." Angel pointed out.

"So we keep it a secret...they'll never find out. Agreed?" Everyone nodded.

"I just have this to say and then we can go." Angel's voice had taken on the deadly calm tone the other's had learned was a warning sign of death and carnage. "If anyone tries to 'speak' to Xander, Spike and I will not hesitate to kill them. If any of you can't handle us killing any human who might endanger Xander then I suggest you leave now. As much as Spike and I love every single person in this room, as much as it would hurt to lose any of you we will kill for him. We've let a lot of things go on that we normally wouldn't have out of respect for you...our family. We won't look for trouble but if it comes to us we will take care of the problem."

"Maybe we shouldn't do this after all." Xander searched the faces of his friends.

"Damn it! You two couldn't keep your gobs shut could you!" Spike was frustrated now, having been happy until talk of someone hurting Xander had come into play. He knew Wesley and Angel were both right. He didn't want to do anything that would draw more attention to Xander and get him hurt. The boy was in danger far too often for Spike's liking as it was. Still, he wanted this more than he had ever wanted anything in his life. To have it taken away before it even happened was painful. He noted the hurt expression on Wesley's face, regretting hurting the man's feelings. He knew Wesley was just looking out for Xander and he loved the man for that.

"I'm sorry for snapping, Wes. It's just...you've scared the boy." Xander gave him an incredulous look.

"Is that what you think? I don't give a fuck about anyone coming after me. I know everyone in this room would lay their lives down for me...that's what I'm worried about. I don't want anyone getting hurt or having my family break up because of me."

"Who said anything about leaving? Claiming or no claiming we all know Spike and Angel would kill someone if they tried to hurt you..or any of us for that reason. We're still here aren't we?" Cordelia pointed out.

"Yeah, and as for the laying down our lives, don't we do that everyday?" Oz added. "Seems to me this is life as usual except for keeping a secret." Xander smiled at his friends.

"Well, being as you put it that way...let's get on with the celebrating."

"Finally." Doyle led the others out of the room, happy to get the partying started.


Chapter Forty

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