Stranger in a Strange World

This one was just plain strange. It's about an alternate universe, and is mainly Iolas's story, but for some reason, TPTB decided to include Xena and Gabrielle in thankless roles. Gabrielle might as well not have even been in it. Renee fans will be sorely disappointed.

I hate it when Hercules slides long distances on his butt during a fight. I'm glad they left that particular tactic out of X:WP.

Hercules is even better looking with a beard.

The key to this alternate universe is everyone's counterpart's personalities are VERY different than the real version. It's very much like the Star Trek episode Mirror, Mirror. Therefore:
Hercules, sporting a beard, is very evil and cruel.
Iolas is a court jester.
Ares is the God of…get this…Love, dressed all in white!
Aphrodite is to be married to Hercules, and is a dowdy, serious woman.
Joxer is a skilled fighter, determined in assassinating Hercules.
Xena acts like an enthused gun moll, with short black hair and long fingernails. She and Hercules are lovers, and she keeps a constant supply of hind's blood on hand.
Gabrielle is "The Executioner", a whirling dervish of a killing machine. We only see her briefly at the end, when her identity is made known.

Most of the "new" characterizations are disturbing. I don't like seeing Iolas as a court jester.

Is Aphrodite really Iolas's buddy in the real world? I haven't watched enough Hercules' episodes to know.

Aren't Hercules and Aphrodite closely related, by the way? I'll have to look into that.

The first glimpse of Xena is of her long fingernails.

Her short hair definitely takes some getting used to, but I didn't find it unflattering.

Love her pouty, "You're not going to punish me, are you?"

That is some whip, she carries!

She tells Iolas, "When I want a eunuch, I'll ask for one." Wow!

And she flirts insatiably, "Oh Sov, you're so good when you're bad."

She's wearing some sort of bustier.

She does a back flip, then when the Sovereign (alternate Hercules) lands behind her, she butt bounces him backwards so she can lie on top of him.

Then he throws her backwards so she lands on the bed. He pounces on her.

Xena doesn't seem to mind at all that Sov is getting married.

She says soon Hercules will be wearing a maid's outfit and a collar.

Sov replies that's more her style.

They fight and wrestle their way around the room, breaking everything.

Iolas says it best, "Their foreplay is going to get me killed."

Gun moll Xena sure does work that tongue…it's in overdrive.

Sovereign, referring to Xena; She's quite a doll, isn't she? There's a world of scheming going on behind those baby blues."

Xena works those nails too.

I read somewhere, that when Kevin throws Lucy over his shoulder, it was unscripted. That makes Xena's squeal and beating on his back even funnier.

Oh yeah, Ares, as the God of Love is missing his beard too.

Xena could have been a magician's assistant with the way she introduced the Executioner.

Hercules summoned some of his prisoner's, and there were men, women, and children. He was going to kill them all.

Xena wasn't too impressed with Iolas's juggling.

Xena's comment about Aphrodite was "Amazing, she can smile without cracking that frigid little face."

Iolas's poem about Xena:
His girlfriend Xena's crass,
A heartless wench, no class,
If Zeus were well,
He'd cast a spell,
And knock her on her a-

Xena's not impressed. "What is this? You promised me an execution!"

Xena just watches the Sovereign work with wide-eyed, open-mouthed bemusement.

Xena sounds like Meg when she tells Aphrodite, "You look lovely in virginal black." She even holds Aphrodite's train.

Then Xena wants to know, "About old Zeus…Is it true that he throws thunderbolts because it's the only thing about him that's big and stiff?"

I can't believe she got by with that!

Xena pulls the little tiny Aphrodite doll off the cake, and puts on her own Xena doll, complete with long skirt split.

Xena to Iolas, "You're on, Fool."

Xena blows her nose at the wedding…"It's so beautiful". She sounds like Ezra with the mole.

She tangles with Joxer first.

Then Iolas.

She uses her nails, and fights dirty.

Aphrodite has had enough though, "Eat cake, Baby," she tells Xena, pressing Xena's face into the cake.

Man, they are COVERED in cake.

Gabrielle does not look good with blackened eyes.

Xena throws her shoe like the chakram.

"Guess I had more skills than I thought," she quips.

And all is returned to normal in the universe. This wasn't a particularly great outing for Xena and Gabs…the next one will be much better.

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