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- 106.You know your daddy's CB handle, but not his real name.
- 107.You own a monogrammed minnow bucket.
- 108.You think cow tipping should be an Olympic sport.
- 109.Your underwear doubles as swimming trunks.
- 110.Your veterinarian is also a taxidermist.
- 112.Your wife gets torn bras cuz you put fishin hooks that you found on the ground in yer pocket while ya was fishin, you forget about puttin em there, and she washes em without seein em!
- 113.Your car burns more oil than gas.
- 114.After the Prom you drove the truck while your date hit road signs with beer bottles.
- 115.The taillight covers of your car are made of tape.
- 116.There are more fish on your wall than pictures.
- 117.You have cinder block bookshelves to hold your field & Stream subscriptions.
- 118.There's more oil in your ball cap than in your car.
- 119.You borrow your wedding flowers from Wal-Mart.
- 120.You are still holding on to Confederate money because you KNOW the South will rise again.
- 121.You call your boss "Buddy", on a regular basis.
- 122.You can't mash the brake pedal in your truck for all the beer cans in the way.
- 123.You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
- 124.You consider pork & beans to be a gourmet food.
- 125.You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
- 126.You have 8 cars and still have to bum a ride to work.
- 127.You have a house that's mobile and five cars that aren't.
- 128.You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top.
- 129.You have a Hefty Bag for a passenger-side window.
- 130.You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
- 131.You have ever driven down the road with your seat belt hanging out the door making sparks
- 132.You think the last four words of the National Anthem are "Gentlemen, start your engines!"
- 133.An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.
- 134.Jack Daniels & Jim Beam make your list of "most admired people."
- 135.More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
- 136.Marlboro sends you birthday cards.
- 137.Red Man & Copenhagen chewing tobacco send you a Christmas card each year.
- 138.Taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
- 139.Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
- 140.The best day of your life was when you found an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels "over yonder in them thar hills."
- 141.The gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.
- 186.The make, model, and license plate number of your truck are obscured by a layer of mud.
- 187.The beer truck delivers door-to-door in your neighborhood.
- 188.The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.
- 189.The primary color of your car or truck is "Bondo"
- 190.The rear tires on your car are twice as wide as the front ones.
- 191.There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.
- 192.The most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection (your insurance man is a redneck too if he pays you for it).
- 193.The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.
- 194.You argue to the government that the Budweiser plant should be one of the wonders of the world.
- 195.You can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
- 196.You can't tell what color your car is because of the dirt.
- 197.You've ever killed a "neighbor's" cow, took whatever you could safely haul off, left the rest for dead, and blamed the coyotes!
- 198.You celebrate Groundhog Day because, dammnit! You believe in it.
- 199.You consider duct tape and tarp straps necessities for auto body repair.
- 200.You consider spam a delicacy.
- 201.You honestly believe women are turned on by animal noises and seductive tongue gestures.
- 202.You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.
- 203.You spray lysol and light it in order to kill bugs!
- 204.You keep a pellet gun by the front door.
- 205.You list your parole officer as a reference.
- 206.You own more cowboy boots than sneakers.
- 207.You think a night of fine dining is going to the Snack Bar at Wal-Mart while the automotive department is raising yer truck another 8 inches.
- 208.You think beer, beef jerky and Moon Pies are 3 of the major food groups.
- 209.You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three primary colors.
- 210.You think Tang is in the fruit group.
- 211.You use the term "over yonder" more than once a week.
- 212.You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.
- 213.You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
- 214.You're still upset that they canceled "The Dukes of Hazzard".
- 215.You've ever been given a gun as a present.
- 216.You've ever been to a funeral or wedding where there were more pickup trucks than cars.
- 217.Foreplay consists of a fart war.
- 218.You've ever been too drunk to fish.
- 219.You've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.
- 220.You've ever hollered "Rock the house Bubba!!" during a piano recital.
- 221.You've ever made change in the offering plate at Church.
- 222.You pick up your girlfriend on a bike for the prom.
- 223.You repair your Styrofoam cooler with duct tape and bubble gum.
- 224.You run out of beer and your friends go home.
- 225.Your man fantasizes about fishing, drinking a beer, and getting a BJ!
- 226.You think Campho-Phenique is a miracle drug.
- 227.You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia Boss.
- 228.You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..."
- 229.You use a Chevy as a guest house.
- 230.You use your fishing license as a form of I.D.
- 231.You videotape fishing shows.
- 232.You use the O on a STOP sign to sight your new rifle.
- 233.You wear cowboy boots with shorts
- 234.Your neighbors look at you like "There goes the "hood" when you hang your laundry out to dry.
- 235.You think safe sex is when the participants are married to each other.
- 236.You wake up the day after your wedding to find your sister next to you.
- 237. You're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.
- 238.You're in bed with your wife and you call out a name you gave to a coon you killed.
- 239.You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.
- 240.You've been on TV more than 5 times describing a UFO sighting.
- 241.You've ever barbecued SPAM on the grill.
- 242.You wonder how gas stations keep their restrooms so clean.
- 243.You write off a radiator as a business expense.
- 244.You think that the Styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.
- 245.You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.
- 246."Mudding" and "Off-Roading" are your prime sources of entertainment.
- 247.You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
- 248.You've ever bought a used ball cap.
- 249.You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog.
- 250.You've ever cleaned fish in your living room.
- 251.You've ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone.
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