The Top Ten Archive

Top Ten wrong science exam answers

10. "Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water."
9. "Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."
8. "The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."
7. "Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."
6. "The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have ben taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."
5. "Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away."
4. "Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives."
3. "For fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the hand instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor."
2. "The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax containsthe heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowls, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."
1. "Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."


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