The Top Ten Archive

Top Ten ways to cause trouble at graduation


10. Swap the name lists.
9. Announce that you are renouncing your previous identity and wish to be known henceforth as "Jedi Master Mace Windu"
8. Give the Vice Chancellor a really complex handshake.
7. Wear your mortarboard back-to-front.
6. Pull a toy light sabre out from under your robe and say "Feel the power of the dark side!"
5. Two words : smoke bombs.
4. Bribe the registrar to add extra words to your enemy's certificate - e.g. "The University has awarded (name) a Bachelor of Science degree [just so they would go away]."
3. Moonwalk across the podium.
2. Insist they make the reading of the names more like Ray Clay's intro for the Chicago Bulls' home games.
1. In front of the whole crowd, use your degree certificate to light a cigar. Cuban.



This Week's Top Ten

Top Ten Archive

Return to main menu