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Real Newspaper Headlines

* Grandmother of eight makes hole in one

* Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing

* Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

* House passes gas tax onto Senate

* Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan

* Two convicts evade noose, jury hung

* Milk drinkers are turning to powder

* Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted

* Quarter of a million Chinese live on water

* Farmer bill dies in house

* Iraqi head seeks arms

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