My early adult years were spent SEARCHING...beginning with studying with Catholics and Jehovah's Witnesses. I was intent on finding God. I wanted to find out where God had been during my childhood and turbulent teen years.
I married my second husband, during this time. My husbands were different as night and day, so I thought. One so aggressive and sure of himself. The other so shy and gentle. When he asked me to marry him I felt I would finally be safe. And in many ways I was. He was my rock...my anchor. I know that my sanity was safer married to him than at any other time of my life up to that point.
After we married, he went into basic training. And soon we ended up stationed in Indian Springs, Nevada. We found out we were going to have a baby, and our search for God intensified. His commanding officer was a Mormon, and he wanted us to attend his church and to study with the missionaries from there. We agreed. By the time our first child...Bethany was born in Las Vegas, Nevada, we were fully baptised Mormons. Bethany weighed 9 pounds 5 ounces and was 21 and a half inches long at birth. One of the things we liked the most about the Mormon Church was their love of family. Some of their teaching from the missionaries had caused me to have questions, but I was sure that I would resolve them.
Our second daughter, Amber was born at Fairchild AFB in Washington. She weighed 9 pounds 6 ounces and was 20 and a half inches long. Soon after Amber was born we moved to Tucson, Arizona. It is in Tucson that we really investigated the Mormon Church to which we belonged.
Not long after Amber was born my father told me that I have an older sister. He felt he needed to tell me before she found me. This rocked my world. My only claim to his heart (I thought) had always been that I was the oldest. Because I was the oldest, he remembered my birth weight and my birth length (not remembering my two little sisters'). With this information, my basis as his oldest was shattered. Not to mention the betrayal. Another lie in my life. And she had children also, older than mine, so not only was I not the oldest, my children were not his first grandchildren. I was devastated. I found out that we had grown up only blocks from each other and had a best friend in common!!! It was one of the weirdest things in my life. Her name is Sharon and we are now best of friends...despite the uncertain beginning! She lives in California with her four daughters and we don't get to see one another very often.I eventually led my oldest sister and her children to the Mormon Church, and my best friend also became interested and joined after I did. It is amazing to me that we all ended up together, but we did. I am so thankful that they left the church with me...each one reading The Godmakers on their own, of course, and making their own decision.
I have always held the theory that truth is truth and that truth can withstand any scrutiny and questioning you throw at it, that is why it is truth. Therefore when I began questioning what I had learned in the Mormon temple and was told that I COULD NOT question these things, I was instantly on the offensive. I went to my Bishop and asked him why I could not question the things I had learned in the temple. I was told they were too secret, too sacred. But they also smacked of Satanism to me and if I didn't get my questions answered I would go crazy and leave the church anyway. So I took my search to the University of Arizona, Tucson.
What I found out is that i feel that Mormonism has many problems in its history and in how it is run, and especially in temple ritual. Things that border on Satanic. And things they don't want the run of the mill member to know or to question too closely. I spent several years reading history books of the church including ones from children of very high placed Mormons, and many ex-Mormons. I came away knowing that this church was not for me. Unfortunately my husband had not been studying with me and was unwilling to believe anything I said.
Our two sons were born in Tucson...David, who was 10 pounds 1 and one half ounces and 22 inches long, and Jeremy, who was 9 pounds 7 ounces and 21 inches long. All of our children were blessed in the Mormon church, and had been raised as Mormons most of their lives. My husband and I had many problems around this time and had been separated a couple of times over our problems. We separated again when Jeremy was 2 and I went home to Washington and my family.
It is also in Tucson that I met Patricia, who was destined to become one of my greatest and best friends. At the time we were both working for The Home Office of Tucson. Later she went to work for her father in his party supply business. Now she runs the business, called Party Supplies, Inc.!!! We have managed to remain friends over time and distance, and have even managed to visit one another, although not as often as we would like.
It is also in Tucson that we met Doyle and Kristy Diener and their children. We have also been friends ever since!!! Kristy and I and Barb Grantham and Starla used to sneak out of our homes at night and meet or go over to Jack-In-The-Box to share our lives...girl talk. I miss those times so much.
Sheila and I were baptised together just before my 33rd birthday at what is now Sonrise Church of Christ. It was a difficult transition for me because in Christianity, there was no unity or conformity. And I spent some time getting used to the plethora of stuff out there for Christians to study and read and do and listen to. It was initially overwhelming and I often missed the order of Mormonism.
During my research I had stumbled onto an excellent book if you have relatives in mormonism you are praying for. It is called The Godmakers by Dave Hunt. When it came time to witness to Ron I presented the book to him by saying, "If you read this book and still wish to remain a Mormon, the children and I will support your decision." By the third chapter he was asking questions that couldn't be answered and by the end of the book he had left the Mormon church with us...praise God.
This did not happen until my husband had been stationed again in Alaska, we had faced a major marital crisis and almost divorced, gotten back together and moved to Texas. We stayed with a Mormon family when we first came here because we were still praying about a way to lead my husband out of the Mormon church. After reading the book and leaving the church he went through a crisis of faith and didn't go to church for awhile. Ron was disillusioned, discouraged and angry at God. We didn't find a church until we moved on base and met a woman at the base pool named Pam.
Pam had been recently diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and was at the pool daily to exercise her muscles. The kids and I were there daily after work to have fun. We started talking and discovered we had the love of the same music. During our conversations I mentioned we were looking for a church and she invited us to hers...Crossroads Baptist Church. She said her paster, Lynn, related the gospel to football! I knew we were in business because my husband loved football. And I was right. Lynn helped our family in so many ways. Because he preached a gospel that he made sure all could understand. His wife, Becky, was the gentlest soul I have ever known. And she was a soothing balm to me. We made many friends in this church who remain our friends today.
