I tried to play guitar
Just like Jimi with the "i"
Chipped a tooth, broke a string
It poked me right in the eye!

I don't think I'll ever do that again
Tempting fate and risking something worse
But guess what I did in the second verse!

Reached in a boiling pan
Like Hannah in "Blade Runner"
Mine was no far threshold
Relived that classic stunner!

I don't think I'll ever do that again
Tempting fate and risking something worse
But that's just what I said in the first verse!

I ran into 5:30 traffic
To rescue a quarter and a dime
Fractured limbs and ribs, inner bleeding
Paramedics got there just in time!

I don't think I'll ever do that again
Tempting fate and risking something worse
But that's what I said in the second verse!

I said to the IRS agent
Respect Joe Farah's Right to Free Speech!
Guns in face, my security's breached
Because Billy's thugs are rampaging!

I don't think I'll ever do that again
Tempting fate and risking something worse
But that's just what I said in the third verse!

© 1999 Bruce V. Bracken