Chapter 65 : "The End"
It had already been three days since the accident. It felt like it had been
a month. I wondered how the Hansons had been able to keep it from the media
for so long. I continued reading the paper until I heard a small moan. I
collapsed the paper on to my lap and looked to my left. I watched with utter
disbelief for a few moments and saw Taylor's fingers wiggle. He made another
tiny sound and I hastily called the nurse as the tears sprung to my eyes. The
nurse came in and I quickly asked to be put in my wheel chair. She agreed,
but didn’t notice the teenager on my left that was slowly but surely coming
to. Once in my chair, the nurse hurried off before I had a chance to tell her
why I wanted my chair in the first place. She had simply let me into my wheelchair. Apparently the nurse wasn’t very well trained.
I pushed myself over to Taylor’s bed and reached over to grab his hand,
using my other to call for the nurse again. Taylor’s eyes fluttered for a
moment and then opened slightly. “Taylor? Are you....?” I swallowed back a
sob. “Taylor, it’s Joey.”
I watched as his eyes came around and attempted to focus on me. I knew he
probably wouldn’t talk for a while, but he was awake and responding to my
words. “Taylor, I love you and I’m here for you. The baby is fine,” I whispered to him. I watched as a tiny hint of a smile appeared on his lips. Inside I was rejoicing. He knew me. He recognized me. He remembered. That had been my
main concern: Amnesia. I just wanted him to know me. Suddenly, a doctor came
rushing in along with another nurse. He rushed to Taylor’s bed and pulled out
the clipboard at the end. I watched as he frantically recorded things and did
a few quick tests on Taylor. Then he turned to me.
“Mrs. Baldwin, when did he wake up?” the doctor asked me quickly.
“Don’t you guys have all those fancy gadgets that tell you this kind of
stuff?” I asked.
“Well, the nurse that watched those ‘gadgets’ was fired last night for
falling asleep on the job and missing a pop-off. Could you please just answer
the question?” he asked again.
“About five minutes ago he moaned or made some sort of sound,” I told him.
“Has he responded to you?” the doctor questioned.
“Well, I thought I saw him smile just a minute ago,” I admitted happily.
I was going to have Taylor back.
For the rest of the day, I was so happy it was nearly sickening. Every
day after that, Taylor would progress a little. Soon, he was able to stay
awake for four or five hours at a time, and he was starting to talk again. He
still remembered everything he knew before the accident, but he was having
trouble with physical activity. His reaction to pain was slow and little. I
didn’t care much about that, though, because when he began to talk again, I
couldn't have asked for more.
“Joey?” I heard him call in a hoarse voice one night around 7. Everyone
was down in the cafeteria, leaving Taylor and me alone for a few moments.
“Yes, Taylor?” I pulled myself up in my bed and looked over at him.
“Joey, I’ve missed you,” he sighed.
“I thought you have no sense of time in a coma,” I laughed.
“You don’t, but in the day it felt like I was asleep, I’ve really missed
you,” he forced out.
“I’ve missed you, too, Taylor. I’m so glad you’re back,” I confessed.
“I love you, Josephina Merideth Baldwin,” he could only smile a little, but I know that if he could, he would smile as large as possible, just for me.
“I love you, too, Jordan Taylor Hanson,” I smiled back at him. “Welcome
back.”
I will never forget the next morning. I woke up to doctors scurrying
around Taylor’s bed, unhooking things from the wall and yelling orders.
“Put him onto the stretcher on three! 1..2...3!”
“Get the oxygen bag in place!”
“Will somebody please get that lady out of here!”
“Taylor, baby, it’s okay!”
“Let’s go!”
With the last statement, I watched as the doctors and nurses carted him
away. I was crying now, worried about Taylor. I couldn’t lose him, too.
“Mom? MOM!!” I shouted through my tears.
“It’s okay baby, I’m right here,” my mother came to my side and held my
hand.
“Mom, what’s-what’s wrong with Taylor?” I sobbed.
“Well, honey, apparently his brain is swelling to an unsafe pressure, and
it is beginning to cut off some major arteries-”
“What? Will he be...” I cut in, but she simply put a finger to my lips.
“But, if they can just relieve some of the pressure by draining some
fluid, they’ll be able to save him,” she finished.
“And if they can’t?”
She looked at me, and then away from me with tears in her eyes. “Just
pray they can, sweetheart,” she sighed, looking me in the eyes. I knew what
that meant. If the pressure remained, then Taylor would cease to be and join
his brothers and Kat.
That night, I had a dream I shall never forget. I saw a glow towards the
end of my bed that seemed to be this beautiful light that I just wanted to
touch. Then, I saw Kat and Zac and Isaac stood together, looking at me, the
light penatrating around them, and through them and off them--they were the
light. Suddenly, Taylor got up out of the bed beside me and detached all the
things he was hooked up to. Soon after that, his body began to glow and I saw
the old Taylor again. His eyes were bright, his smile was like I remembered.
His face was pure once again and his body untouched by any form of harm. He
was angelic. And that’s when I realized--he WAS angelic. He was part of
Heaven now. Before joining the rest of my friends, though, he walked over to
me and kissed me softly on the forehead.
“Taylor, don’t go.”
“Joey, I have to. It’s better this way.”
“I don’t have anyone but you left!”
“Yes you do. You have our baby. You have your family and mine, and don’t
forget Tim. He loves you--almost as much as I love you.”
“Taylor, please, don’t leave me,” I forced through my tears.
“I’ll be waiting for you, my love,” he tenderly whispered in my ear.
Then, he turned around and joined his brothers and Kat.. Kat blew me a kiss,
Isaac mouthed “We love you” and Zac simply smiled and waved. Then, before I had a chance to say another word, the light faded and I was alone.
Chapter 66 : The End
I woke up then and looked over at my mom.
“Taylor’s gone,” I stated, smiling, but the tears were already running down my cheeks. I was glad Taylor was happy. I only wanted that for him, even when he was alive. I couldn’t help but to think, though, how I would live without his love, support, kindness, and just his gentle words in my ear. How was my baby going to be happy without a father. I knew he was with his brothers and Kat and I hoped they were all as happy as I wanted them to be. The world was losing four of the greatest people that ever stepped onto its surface.
Two days later, I was released from the hospital--alone. Taylor had died from the swelling the night I had the dream, and I knew I couldn’t stay in that hospital any longer. Finally the news was released to the press. A “media frenzy” took place and I, luckily, remained nameless in every article. Fans all over the world mourned the loss of the three guys that had controlled my life for the past year. It hurt me to see people act like it was no big deal, though. These were three very special people that could never be replaced.
Yesterday was really hard. Mrs. Hanson came over and gave me a few things. A couple of things Taylor had instructed in a short will that would be given to me. Among the things was his journal, a folder full of songs and poems, a disk containing stories he had written, a tape of him singing to me, his little keyboard he always played for me when I was depressed and a letter. I opened the letter, tears in my eyes and I could hear his voice as I read, almost as if he was reading it to me......
Dear Joey,
If you have recieved this, the unthinkable has happened. I am no longer with you. I’m no longer with the world. I’ve gone on to a better place, but I will tell you right now that I miss you with all my heart. Joey, I know I probably didn’t ever say it enough, but I love you. I love you. I loved you with all my heart from the day you told me the story of your past to the day I died. Nothing-NOTHING in the world could ever take away that love. You were everything that was me. You knew everything about me and could tell me and show me things about myself that I never knew. You challenged my lifestyle, you challenged my emotions, you even challenged my love for you, and by doing so, you showed me so many things I never would have seen with my blindness to life. I’m sure you miss me right now, because I love you. But, as our song goes, “I’ll Be With You in Your Dreams.” I put that onto the tape. When I made that tape, I was crying, and I’m sure you can tell by all the sniffling I did when I talked. Even in my last moments, I know that I will be thinking of your wonderful face and your sweet, kind, generous, loving, and forgiving personality.
Joey, right now I’m trying as hard as I can to hold back the tears, because what I have to say hurts me just to think about it. This letter is written in case I don’t make it to your 18th birthday. When I found out you were pregnant, I knew it was the only thing right to do. On your 18th birthday, I intended to ask for your hand in marriage. I’m so sure of this, that I’ve already bought the ring. You’ll find it taped inside the very back of my journal. I not only want to ask you to marry me because it’s the moral thing to do, but also because I want to. I want to be with you forever. I want to wake up every morning with you by my side, morning breath and all. I want to be the father of all your children. I want to be your husband.
Please Joey, never forget you are the most wonderful and beautiful person in the world, inside and out. I love you Josephina Meredith Baldwin.
You’ll always be my heart and soul,
Jordan Taylor Hanson
By the time I finished the letter, I was sobbing so hard it was uncontrollable. I opened the journal and removed the ring from the back cover. I opened the small envelope it was in and pulled it out. It was small, but gorgeous. A small diamond was set on the 24 karat gold and inside the ring was inscribed the words, “I love you eternally.”
Two months later, I knew I couldn't stand to stare at all the reminders of my lost friends. I threw the unimportant things away, but kept most of it, especially the rose, and put it in a box labeled respectfully, “The End.” It was the end of our living friendship, the end of a wonderful group of people and in a way, the end of part of my life. I began my new life as a person who would never leave the ones she loved without saying “I love you.” I found it harder to open up and love those I didn’t know well enough. I only kept one thing out of the entire box of stuff commemorating the friendships I once had with four people: the ring. I wear it on the ring finger of my left hand.
Right now, my biggest moral supporter is Tim. He is turning out to be a really great friend. Just like Taylor told me, he loves me like a best friend should love you, and I’m pretty sure I love him, too. I couldn’t have asked for a better friend at the lowest point in my life.
After everyone had died, Kat’s mom revealed to me that after all those years, she was pregnant again, so Kat was going to have a baby sister. She wasn’t going to tell Kat until she noticed, but she wished she had. Kat would have been a REAL big sister finally. It upset me truely, that’s one thing Kat really wanted in life. Kat should have stayed, I shouldn’t have let her go, but whats done is done after all. I have my regrets. I still keep in touch with them. The doctor says their isn’t much chance for Kat’s mom to live and the baby to live, so Kat’s mom just might see Kat soon. Maybe it was meant to be that way.
My legs are still in very bad shape, and I still have to visit my physical therapist once a day for an hour. They told me I’d walk again, but I would never be the same. That didn’t come as a big surprise. Without my best friends by my side, I know I will never be the same person ever again.
THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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