Male Bashing
- What can a bird do that a man can't?
- Whistle through his pecker.
- Why don't women blink during foreplay?
- They don't have time!
- Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
- They won't stop and ask for directions.
- Why did God put men on earth?
- Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
- Why don't women have men's brains?
- Because they don't have a penis to keep it in.
- What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
- They are usually meant for children, but it's the men who usually end up playing with them.
- Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
- Because their balls fall over their asshole and they vapor-lock.
- Why do men masturbate?
- Because it's sex with someone they love.
- Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
- So they won't hump women's legs at parties.
- Why did God create man before woman?
- You need a rought draft before you have a final copy.
- Why is pee yellow and sperm white?
- So he can tell if he's coming or going.
- How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
- Don't know, it hasn't happened yet.
- Have you heard of the Lorena Bobbit computer virus?
- It turns your hard drive into a 3 1/2 floppy.
- What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his brain?
- A widower.
- What do you do if you look out into the backyard and find your husband stumbling and staggering about?
- Load another clip.
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