| 1.In the company of females,intercourse should be referred to as: |
| a) lovemaking |
| b) screwing |
| c) the pigskin bus pulling into tunatown | 2.You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared: |
| a) your views about what you expect from a sexual realtionship |
| b) your blood test results |
| c) five tequila slammers | 3.You time your orgasm so that: |
| a) your partner climaxes first |
| b) you both climax simultaneously |
| c) you don't miss Sports Center | 4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is: |
| a) healty,creative love-play |
| b) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would ever agree to |
| c) not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about | 5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with |
| a) the best part of the experience |
| b) the second best part of the experience |
| c) $100 extra |
| 6. Your girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in weight in the last month. You will tell her that it is: |
| a) No concern of yours |
| b) not a problem, she can join a gym |
| c) a conservative estimate |
| 7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is: |
| a) a myth |
| b) an oxymoron |
| c) a moron |
| 8. Foreplay is to sex as: |
| a) appetizer is to entree |
| b) primer is to paint |
| c) a line is to an amusement park ride |
| 9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a realtionship? |
| a) "I hope we can still be freinds." |
| b) "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep." |
| c) "Welcome to Dumpsville,Population: YOU." |
| 10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate: |
| a) probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy |
| b) is uptight and a waste of time |
| c) shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place |
| Results: |
| If you answered "a" more than 7 times,check your pants to make sure you really are a man. |
| If you answered "b" more than 7 times, check into threapy,you're still a little confused. |
| If you answered "c" more than 7 times,"YOU DA MAN" |
