| Exclamations:
"Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!"
"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!"
Threats:
"I'll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outta style."
"This'll jar your perserves
"Don't you be makin me open a can o'whoop-ass on ya!"
Good Things/Compiments:
"Cute as a sack full of puppies."
"If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me ejoy it."
"Gooder than grits."
The Weather:
"It's so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs."
"It's been hotter'n a goats butt in a pepper patch."
Wintery roads are said to be "Slicker than otter snot."
Descriptions:
When something is hard to do, it's"like trying to herd cats."
"He ran like his feet was on fire and his ass was catchin."
A hectic schedule keeps you"Busier than a cat covering crap on a marble floor."
"KISS MY GRITS"
Insults:
"She's uglier than homemade soap."
"Your momma's so fat, when she stepped up on the scale to be weighed, it said "to be continued."
"He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down."
"Uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits."
"The wheels still turning, but the hamsters dead."
Any insulting statement is always followed by"Bless his/her heart."
"She's dumber than a door knob, bless her heart."
"BACK"
"HOME"
"5/99"
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