It should have been called End of Arnold's Career. I took notes on this one, so I'll take you through them.
The problems start at the very beginning where it says that Vatican City is part of Rome. It isn't. Vatican City lies within Rome, but it is an independant state. The birthdate is 0, and it's the only nation whose economy is based entirely on donations. There are some who would deny that Vatican City is, in fact, idependant, but they are wrong. Anyway, it's the 60's, and it's Vatican City. A young priest looks out the window and sees that a comet is just sitting there over the moon, not moving at all. Of course, the comet leaves eventually, but how does it know when to? Does it sit there and think OK, I'll just stay here for an hour. They'll have gotten the message by then? Well, the stationary comet is a sign. It is called the Eye of God because, sitting above the moon like that, it looks kind of like it sort of is trying to resemble something that might possibly look like it could be eye-shaped. Meanwhile, in New York, a woman gives birth to a baby girl. Actually, it's several baby girls of varying sizes. This girls is special. She has a weird mark on her arm, so immediately, they take her into the back room to clean her up, but her in a blanket, shrink her down to newborn size (for some shots) and feed her rattlesnake blood. Isn't that cute.
Now, we jump forward to December 28, 3 days before 2000, which, by the way, is a new century (which is wrong, but we won't get into that here) and will cause all the computers to crash (which didn't happen). We're in New York, where freedom looks like too many choices. In New York, I found a friend to drown out the other voices. Sorry. I accidentally switched to U2 mode. Anyway, a special effect comes out of the sewer and possesses Gabriel Byrne. I like Gabriel Byrne, but now Gabriel Byrne is Satan (not to be confused with Mr. Satan of Dragonball Z). It's about this time that we meet Arnold. His name is Jericho, and he's a bodyguard and former cop. He puts a gun to his head and everyone hopes he fires. Sadly, he doesn't because Kevin Pollack shows up to drive him to work. The job pays well, so Arnold goes. Oh yeah, and they're in New York.
Anyway, the guy they're protecting is Gabriel Byrne (Satan), and Arnold takes a bullet for him, which is a sham, really, since it makes the movie go on so much longer. So, Arnold and Kevin go after the shooter in a helicoptor, and Arnold tangles from a rope and catches him. While attached to the rope, Arnold and the gunner crash through a glass awning-type thing which has a metal frame. Somehow, the rope doesn't snag on the metal frame when Arnold runs after the guy while still attached to the rope (and the coptor). Well, it turns out the guy's a priest who warns Arnold about something. The dialogue is horrible, and Arnold's acting is Arnold. So Arnold and Kevin go to the priest's house to look around. The cops show up, but it's OK for Arnold to be there because he used to be a cop. They find the priest's tongue in a jar. Please notice that I spelled tongue properly. It's T-O-N-G-U-E, not T-O-U-N-G-E. I hate that. Oh yeah, the priest's name is Thomas Aquinas. He's the same priest who saw the Eye of God all those years ago. And he looks nothing like the real Thomas Aquinas. Arnold also finds a picture of the woman who was born at the beginning of the film. Her name is Christine York (played by Robin Tunney, which means therre will be a gratuitous boob shot later). Christine's parents are dead, so she lives with the people who fed her snake blood. Anyway, Christine has weird visions of Satan (Gabriel Byrne).
Arnold visits a priest for help with the case, but he acts like a jerk, so the priest is reluctant. Then Arnold discovers the hidden catacomb with the Stigmatics, like all churches have. Meanwhile, they're in New York, and Satan visits Christine's surrogate father. After that, he visits Father Thomas and crucifies him n the ceiling. Thomas has a bunch of stuff carved into his abdomen. It's hard to make out, but it looks like Christ in New York. We all know it really says Christine York. It's because they're in New York, you see. So, Christine shows her boobs to the camera (like I predicted)m and some guys in black break in to try to kill her. They give the Last Rites, and Arnold, who just happened to be in the neighborhood, comes to the rescue. There's a lame fight sequence, and Arnold meets up with Christine. Then Satan shows up and takes a leak on the porch. Satan pees black oil. I want to know what he's been drinking. The black oil seeps down to the van where Kevin Pollack is waiting, and Satan ignites it. Kevin dies, and Satan goes after Christine.
Now, here's where it's really stupid. Christine was chosen at birth (hence, the birthmark), and it was foretold that between 11:00 and midnight on the last day of 1999, Satan would conceive a child with the chosen woman. That child would bring about the titular phrase, the end of days. We can't allow that to happen. In theory, Satan would have 24 hours to work with. If he's too late, he could just drag her to another time zone, right? Well, no. Satan only has a one hour window. You see, New York time is really the universal standard, so the lovin' has to take place between 11:00 and 12:00 EST. Yep, all those years ago, someone wrote Satan will come to an undiscovered place that we've never heard of but will have colonized by then, and there will be an organized system of things called time zones where time varies, not like now. In this place, Satan will conceive a child with the chosen woman between the hours o 11:00 and 12:00 within this time zone and bring about the End of Days. It kind of makes you wonder, though, if the whole idea of time zones came from this prediction....
Back to the story, Arnold confronts the police chief person and kills her. Satan raises her from the dead. After Arnold drops Christine off at the church, he goes home and Satan's there. Satan offers Arnold his family (or a reasonable substitute) in exchange for Christine. (Arnold's wife and kid were killed.) Arnold throws Satan out the window. Arnold runs to the church to get Christine away. No good reason, really. He just wants to. Well, Satan shows up and kills a bunch of priests. Kevin also shows up and drives Christine away while Arnold is crucified by Satan. As you may have figured out, Satan had raised Kevin from the dead to do his bidding.
So, the still-living priest cuts Arnold down, and Arnold walks in on some big Satanic ritual in which Satan plans to have sex with Christine. Oh yeah, and this is all happening in New York. There's a big shootout, and Arnold and Christine escape on the subway in New York. Satan follows, and as always, Arnold has his trusty grenade launcher. Ever notice how Arnold always has a grenade launcher? Anyway, he blows up the subway and escapes with Christine. Meanwhile, Satan's body is useless, so he needs a new one. Also, somehow, Satan's minions know exactly where Arnold would be when he left the subway. I'm not sure why, and they really served no purpose. So, Arnold and Christine go back to the church in New York, and Arnold tells Christine to hide until he's finished with Satan. Then, as an afterthought, Arnold decides to have faith again.
So, Satan shows up at the New York church and possesses Arnold. He tells Christine it's all ok, and he tries to boff her on the altar. But then Satan is overcome with performance anxiety or something, and Christine escapes. Then Arnold, in a last ditch effort to win, impales himself on something sharp. It's late, and Satan won't have time to find another body. Clock strikes midnight, Satan loses, and Arnold is reunited with his family. Then we rewind the movie and try to forget about it.