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More Jokes :)

Bumper Stickers:

If You Can Read This, I Can Slam On My Brakes And Sue You

1,000,000 Sperm And YOU Were The Fastest??

Jesus Loves You, The Rest Of Us Think You're An Idiot.

Forget World Peace -- Visualize Turning Off Your Turn Signal!

HANG UP AND DRIVE!

Where There's A Will...I Want To Be In It!

Ever Stop To Think, And Forget To Start Again?

I Have The Body Of A God .......... Buddha

This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me

If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?

This Bumper Sticker Exploits Illiterates

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway

Honk If Anything Falls Off

He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest

He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost, But Miles From The Next Exit

I Haven't Lost My Mind - It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere

30 Harsh Things A Woman Can Say To A Naked Man
1.  I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2.  Ahhhh, it's cute.
3.  Why don't we just cuddle?
4.  You know they have surgery to fix that.
 5.  Make it dance.
 6.  Can I paint a smiley face on it?
 7.  Wow, and your feet are so big.
 8.  It's OK, we'll work around it.
 9.  Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
 10. Oh no... a flash headache.
 11. (giggle and point)
 12. Can I be honest with you?
 13. How sweet, you brought incense.
 14. This explains your car.
 15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
 16. Why is God punishing me?
 17. At least this won't take long.
 18. I never saw one like that before.
 19. But it still works, right?
 20. It looks so unused.
 21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
 22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
 23. Are you cold?
 24. If you get me real drunk first.
 25. Is that an optical illusion?
 26. What is that?
 27. It's a good thing you have so many other
 talents.
 28. Does it come with an air pump?
 29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people
 on personality.
 30. I guess this makes me the early bird.
        

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© 1999 Rob's World ®

07/11/1999