"THE WISDOM OF REHMI RAH"
(C. DeCracken)
[audio track] If you walk this way, you can see the recent findings of the Egyptian god, Rehmi Rah. These writings were found in ancient underground dwellings, and they speak of Rehmi Rah as being the god of the wisdom of the universe, which was hidden from all others, even the gods, except for his chosen few. They would inherit everything.
(fades out) If you follow me this way, we now go to room C, which contains artifacts from the ancient Babylonian period...
I wish to know your wisdom
Rehmi Rah
Take me as a true-born son
I pass through
dimensions unknown
his wisdom in me
shall be ensewn
Towards his throne
I did aspire
Affront were three statues
and my mind inquired
The statues resembled
creatures of home
One had a face
one I'd known?
Forms? Servants? Messengers? Familiars?
of such things I could only gather
He pointed at one
I held my heart
and listened well
as he began to start
[through distorted mic] "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!"
He then pointed
at the next statue that be
Embraced in laughter
he smiled at me
[through distorted mic] "Why did the chicken cross the ground? To get to the other slide!"
He pointed at the final statue
which bore the human face
the final lesson did he pursue
there was no use pausing his pace
[through distorted mic] "Why did Bill Clinton cross the road? To smoke some weed!"
I was disappointed
laden with rage
I cried aloud
"curse your ways"
[through distorted mic]
"This is the wisdom
that you sought
this is the wisdom
of Rehmi Rah"
"I'm disappointed by years spent
I roamed from Greece to Spain to China
and so many lands lower and higher
but no secret wisdom has been met"
[through distorted mic]
"What do you call four Spaniards drowning in the ocean?
Cuatro cinco!
This is the wisdom
that you sought
this is the wisdom
of Rehmi Rah"
"Much more wisdom I hoped to explore
Where is the real wisdom, may I implore?"
[through distorted mic]
"Why do you rhyme
in such prose?
'blah blah blah'
to bore your foes?"
[m.b. Happy Gilmore] "How about I just go eat some hay? I can make things out of clay and lay by the bay. I just may. What do you say?"
[through distorted mic]
"This is the wisdom
that you sought
this is the wisdom
of Rehmi Rah"
I was returned from where I'd come
and forever curse the wisdom of Rehmi Rah
so I mourned
so I cried
till some punk
bumped my side
"Careful fool
if you mind
I have no time
to heed your kind"
With his reply
the en garde was sung
"it takes one
to know one"
My new-found wisdom
was beyond human eye
"I know you are
but what am I!?"
And so he slumped to grieve beneath
(for my wisdom none can repeat)
to feed on the dust of such defeat
I now have what I sought
and praise the wisdom of Rehmi Rah
[audio track] Who was the last king of the Ancient Babylonian Era?
Your momma!
[laughter sound effect]
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