Chapter 65
“Mrs. Carter, now all you have to do is lie back and relax. Unfortunately, I cannot put you to sleep for this...there is a risk with the baby. So, we are going to numb the area, and then proceed. You feel a bit of discomfort, and maybe a little pain. But, we will give you something for the pain when we are done.” The technician said.
“Dr. Christine, how long will it take to get the results back? Nick leaves in about a week and a half.” I asked.
“Heather, I will put a rush on the test, and we should have it back within about 48 hours. Now, just lay back and relax while they do this.” She said.
“Dee, I am so afraid. I wish Nick were here.” I cried.
Dr. Christine gave me a look. She had wanted me to tell Nick, but she understood my wishes. She couldn’t force me to tell him, and well, she was obligated to follow my wishes. Dee stood there and held my hand while the nurses and everyone proceeded.
After it was all over, I felt miserable. I had pain, and I wasn’t sure I was going to make it. Most of it was my fear of needles and everything. As I tried to sit up, my whole head started to spin and all I wanted to do was lay back down. Dee was very concerned. She took Dr. Christine aside, and started bombarding her with questions.
“Doctor, what is your honest opinion? I mean, do you really think that it is breast cancer? What is going to happen to her? Will she lose the baby? Is it possible she will die?” Dee said as tears poured from her face.
“Ms. Winchell, let’s talk outside.” She said as she opened the door. “Now, since you are her friend, and right now, she doesn’t fully understand the severity of this, I will tell you. What you choose to tell her is your business. But, whatever the outcome, I will not be held responsible for having you upset her.” Dr. Christine said, and then proceeded.
“I do believe that Heather has cancer. It is treatable in normal circumstances, however, her pregnancy poses many complications. The hormones that are released during pregnancy only speed up the process. The cancer spreads faster with all the hormones, and to make matters worse, there is a problem with treatment. As you know, treatment for cancer involves chemotherapy and/or radiation. However, the baby could be affected by this. We can do treatment, at a risk to the baby. We can also discuss aborting the baby, but I highly doubt that either her or Nick will allow that, or we can withhold treatment until the baby is born and then hope for the best.” Dr. Christine said honestly.
“Dear God, please don’t let it be cancer. Please.” Dee said as the tears continued to pour.
After a short while, the doctor said that I could go home. The girls were waiting in the seating area, and when they saw me, they knew it wasn’t good.
“And Mrs. Carter, we will contact you as soon as the results are back.” The front deck nurse said as we left.
*** *** ***
That night, I sat at the dinner table alone waiting for Nick to come home. I had decided that I would tell him, instead of torturing myself. When he walked in, I sat nervously fidgeting.
“Hey honey, how ya doing?” Nick said as he walked up behind me and kisses me on the neck.
“I am okay, how are you?” I answered as I stood up and kissed him sweetly.
We stood there for a moment, enjoying each others presence.
“I missed you today. All the guys seemed out of sorts today too. They were all talking about how the girls have been quiet and distant. I guess it is just that time of year. I think everyone is going through some depression.” Nick answered honestly.
“Yeah, I guess so. We should be happy, but things are just hectic and everything, that life gets swept away. We should all start to embrace life like today is the last day, and enjoy every moment of it.” I said.
Nick turned around and looked at me. He knew there was definitely a message behind that one. “Heather? What did you mean by that? I know something is definitely wrong. Tell me, dammit.” Nick said, his voice full of fear.
“I...I...I went to the doctor today.” I whispered, as I held the tears back.
“And?” he questioned. “Is it the baby?”
“Damn Nick, no, it’s not the baby...it’s me.” I said as a tear poured from my eye.
“Oh God, what is wrong?” he said as he pulled me into his arms.
I winced as he pulled me in for a hug. It hurt so bad that tears streamed down my face and pushed him back. “Please, be gentle, that hurts.”
“What happened? What hurts?” Nick said as he looked at me thoughtfully, but confused.
Suddenly the phone rang, startling the two of us. I picked it up, and heard Brian’s voice on the other end of the line.
“Hiya Brian,...yeah, I’m okay...I suppose.” I answered, bursting into tears and dropping the phone.
Nick immediately picked up the phone, talked with Brian for a moment and then glanced across the room at me. Nick was in total shock as he listened to Brian, not sure if he was serious or not. After hanging up, Nick walked over to me and looked deep into my eyes.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he said as he walked past me.
“I just couldn’t not until I knew for sure.” I replied and tried to follow him.
“Heather, you have lied to me. Why? I am here for you, yet you are shutting me out of your life. You and the baby are the most important things in my life. Not the tour, not the music, not the fame. You...you are my life. Why didn’t you tell me?” Nick said, full of hurt and despair.
“I don’t know...” I said as I ran off and locked myself in our bedroom.
Nick followed me and tried to get in, but couldn’t. He knew that I was hurting, that I needed him, and then realized how serious this all was. He tried to get me to come out, but couldn’t. After begging and pleading for hours outside the bedroom door, he finally gave up and went to lay on the couch. He dialed up Brian to talk, and then called the other guys. They all tried to console him, but were also at a loss for words.
“I suppose we will know sometime tomorrow or Friday.” He said to Howie as he talked. “Yeah...she is devastated. I don’t know what to do. But, Howie, she...she...lied to me. Yeah, I know I should be trying to help her, but I am just upset that she didn’t tell me until now. I could have been there for her.” He rambled. “Tell the guys that I won’t be there tomorrow. I am going to stay here with her. I will call right away if anything happens.” He said and then hung up.
*** *** ***
The next morning, I awoke to find Nick laying on the couch. I felt so bad that I shut him out. Afterall, he was trying to help me.
“Nickolas, wake up. Please. I just want you to hold me, please.” I whispered as I nudged him awake.
He gently stirred and then sat up. “Come here Heather. We will lay here together. I will stay with you through all of this. I will never leave you.” Nick said as he wrapped his arms around me and then we laid back down. We fell back asleep, not caring about anything, except each other. After about three hours, there was a ring of the phone.
Nick jumped up to answer it, feeling anxious. “Hello? Yes, she is here, may I ask who is calling? Sure, just a minute.” He said as he passed the phone to me.
“Hello? Oh yes, hello Dr. Christine. You know already? Yeah...go ahead.” I said and then listened intently as she talked. “Thank you. Yeah...okay...alright...you too....uh huh...okay...bye bye.” I said as I hung up the phone.
Nick and I looked at each other for what seemed like an eternity. “Well, what did she say?” Nick asked impatienly.
I looked at him and then started to tell him....