WHITE TRASH WAL-MART TOOBIN!!
This toobin trip was pretty exciting. This time we traded Amy, Dylan, and Bobby for Justin, Leighann, and Regan. Clint, Luke, Cynthia and I were also along for the ride. the trip started a lot tlike the time before, BBQ at Granzin and then a trip to the Mexican supermarket to emancipate another animal from the skill crane and get toobin supplies. We then set out for Gruene with toobs and beer in hand. We had a great time as the following pictures will clearly illustrate. Some may not be suitable for younger viewers...
Historic Gruene Hall, which promotes itself as the oldest dancehall in Texas. It was cool and all, I got the t-shirt to prove I had been there.
From left to right: Clint, Flounder, Regan, Cynthia, Beer, Leighann, Cowboy J, Luke
KISS fans Luke and C.
These people had their dog on the river, I just thought it was pretty cool.
Shooting the Rapids. This is the set after the ones where I thought I was going to die. I shot the rapids without a toob and lost my hat and shades. (J. later recovered my hat) I held onto the beer in my hand, as I went head first into rocks...
Luke and Pointer Drinking some beer together, man that dog could drink...
BAM BAM Regan
This is the point where the trip got interesting. As you will be able to tell in the following pictures C. got quite drunk. So these girls floated beside us with breasts the size of cantaloupes but twice as round. Anyone on the river could tell that these girls were able to deduct these implants because they were a job related expense. Well Cynthia proceeded to yell "Hey Strippers" and for some reason they were offended by this. So they came back to have a few choice words with her. Justin headed for calmer water and left us there to defend C. from the surgically altered freak shows. They told her that she had bought her swimsuit from wal-mart and that Cynthia was white trash, and that Luke should hit the gym (oh a gym!!!) It was extremely funny and for the next 20 minutes Cynthia explained to us that she bought her swimsuit for $80 from J. Crew and that both her parents had theirs masters and that she would soon have hers, and that she was not white trash. The funniest part is that the working girls never said that they weren't strippers, just that Cynthia shouldn't have said that...
These are pictures of the Hispanic gentlemen that hang out with the lower class caucasian gentlemen near a bridge at the lower end of our route. They gather here to see boobies and collect things people lose over the rapids. Fine upstanding gentleman if you ask me, society has it all wrong about them. I was somewhat dissapointed because we never once heard them play the banjo, or ask a single person to "squeal like a pig"
Soon after the rapids we ran into this young lady. She was toobing along minding her own business when a vortex must have sucked off her entire bathing suit. She made the best of it though and toobed the next 200 or so yards nekkid.
Here she is posing for us, I covered he up with the bouncing Luke head because this is a family site...
All to happy to pose for us.
She never complained about being nekkid, just about getting foreign objects in her unmentionables, but she phrased it a little different...
Looking For a shirt...
YEAH!! I found a shirt!
I found Luke!!!
These next pictures I was not a part of, I have no idea what was going on.
speechless...
Cynthia was having a hard time walking at the end of our journey.
Stay in the tube while we get the cars Cynthia, Funny thing about the cars...
This was the discounted price for opening up the van and making a key for it. He had to make one for Cynthia's car too and charged full price of $75, because I lost her key as well. I felt pretty crappy about it, but there was nothing I could have done except not wear the keys around my neck while swimming...
THE END (and a fine one at that)
Back to My Home Page
