Meekachu: ...Yep. *throws*

White: Ho-boy... You're all gonna be dead customers when Dog gets down, ya know.

Meekachu: Personally, I'm banking on "if" Dog gets down... *throws*

5-20-01:

11:30 PM, Yoshian Standard Time:

(The doghouse's scarce residents are lazing around the glow of late night t.v. An old horror film is posed on the screen.)

Doggirl: *yawn*

Meekachu: I'm never watching a black-and-white picture again as long as I live... *yawn*

Myshu: In your case, you won't be waiting very long then.

Meekachu: *leers at Myshu* What's that supposed to mean?

Myshu: *grin* Grandpa.

Meekachu: *starts to get up, insulted* Who do you think you're--

Miya: --Oh! Meek turn it up. I think it's getting to a good part.

Doggirl: It's ending?

White: *snicker* Not before all the main characters croak.

Meekachu: *attempts to turn up the volume, but accidentally changes the channel*

TV: *fuzz* And here we go, for a million dollars-!

Everyone: Ah!!

Miya: Meek, what'd you do??

Meekachu: I didn't mean to! I can't see the buttons! It's spriffin' dark!

Doggirl: No game show! Bad! *barks at the t.v*

Miya: Shut up, mutt! Meek, let me see it! *reaches for remote*

Meekachu: *holds it out of reach* No way! I am the remote master, pal!

Miya: That's what you think! *throws out her tongue to grab the remote*

Meekachu: *hides the remote behind his back, and Miya misses* Ha!

White: *pulls Miya back* Hey, I think it's my turn to have it!

Doggirl: *on the floor* I never get it...

Meekachu: *backing away from encroaching Miya and White* That's because dogs aren't capable of using remotes!

Miya: Oh, and old geezers like you are?

Meekachu: *snarls* I'm not old, dangit!!

White: *mischievous look* I think he's discriminating against girls... Don't you, Miya?

Miya: As a matter of fact, I do. Gimmie! *charges Meekachu, and tackles him*

Meekachu: Ack! *thud* No! It's mine! Females can't operate the t.v! It's against... uh... the law!

White: What a load of... *pounces on Meekachu as well, creating a dogpile*

(a brief scuffle ensues for custody of the remote)

Myshu: *sneaks up on the distracted three, and plucks the remote from Meekachu's outstretched hand* Yoink.

Meekachu: Ack! Hey! *points at the dragon lady* She's got it! She's got it!!

Myshu: Adios. *springs up, and clings to the ceiling fan*

Miya: Huh? No way!

Myshu: Mwahaha! *taunting* Want your little toy?

Miya: You're dead! *tries to hop in the air and snatch the remote back, but Myshu ducks and weaves out of reach*

White: Idea! *runs over to the wall and switches on the ceiling fan*

Myshu: ...Huh? *starts to spin around*
...Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa!!

(Remote flies from her hands and soars across the room)

Meekachu: I got it...! *dives across the sofa for it*

Miya: No you don't...! *dives in front of Meekachu*

(Both hit the floor in a tangle, and begin to pummel each other in a noisy brawl)

Myshu: Waaaa....! Dizzy-! *is launched from the twirling fan and crashes into the two Yoshies, adding to the din*

(Remote finally lands in front of a bewildered Doggirl)

Doggirl: ...Cool. *takes it*

White: *noticing this* Uh... guys...

Doggirl: Bye. *runs off, remote control in tow*

White: *looks from the fighting Yoshies, to the vacant doorway where Dog just took off, to the television, and sighs with defeat*

...That movie sucked, anyway. *turns off the t.v*

6-21-01:

Miya: *sweeping the floor* Grr... *grumble* stupid chores...

Meekachu: *sitting on the sofa, flipping through t.v channels* ...Having fun?

Miya: Oh yes, I absolutely love doing grunt-work for grandmaster mutt-face. *scowl* Why don't you help me!?

Meekachu: Uh... can't. Bad back.

Miya: You don't have back problems! *hits Meekachu with broomstick*

Meekachu: *feigns collapsing on the sofa in agony* Oh, ow, look what you did! My back... my back...! Oh, the pain...!

Miya: *smirks* Lazy arse. *peers over at Myshu* Well what's your excuse for not helping?

Myshu: *looks up from a notepad she's writing on* ...I'm busy.

Miya: Yeah, right. Looks like you're just writin' a bunch of dumb words on that stupid notepad of yours. You never do any work! What did Dog hire you for, anyway??

Myshu: To write a bunch of dumb words on this stupid notepad of mine. *goes back to writing*

Miya: *frowns* What a gip. That's not real work! I have to sweep the floor, and wash the windows, and fix broken links, and do all kinds of boring, lame, pointless clean-up jobs! You get to just sit there and write! What is it you're writin' so much, anyway? *walks over to look*

Myshu: *hides notepad* Top secret.

Miya: *pouts* No fair!

Myshu: Oh, go get a hobby. One better than whining.

Meekachu: *miraculously recovering* Ha-ha!

Miya: *hits Meekachu with broom again, this time actually hurting him* Hrmph! Laugh at that.

Meekachu: *falls to the floor* Ahh...! Oh, my back! Ow! Really, this time! *moans*

Miya: *grumbles* Yeah, right. *goes back to sweeping*

Myshu: *quietly* ...Haha.

7-8-01:

(Doggirl walks in to find her roommates huddled around a table, filing through a batch of envelopes)

Doggirl: ...Huh? What's going on?

Meekachu: *turns to the entering dog* Oh, hi mutt. We're managing mail.

Doggirl: Uh... *slowly nods* ...yeah. Of course. ...What mail?

Miya: Oh, you know, stuff sent to the doghouse: junk mail, bills... *mumble*fan-mail*mumble* ...letter-bombs... Basic, boring things. Nothing you'd want to look at.

Meekachu: *snickers*

Doggirl: *hears the mumble, anyway* Fan-mail!? *gets excited* Really? I wanna see! Me see! Me see! *runs to the table*

Myshu: Oh, look what you've done. She's going to come and drool all over the letters, now.

Miya: *pushes Doggirl back with a hand* No way, mutt. This is official doghouse business. It can't concern you.

Meekachu: Yeah, sorry. Staff meeting right now. Members only.

Doggirl: Aww...! *whimpers*

Myshu: Shoo. *bats the canine away*

Doggirl: ...Oh... Okay... *plods off, disheartened*

Miya: That was easier than I thought.

Myshu: Moron.

Meekachu: Oh! *holds out a letter* Look at this one! It's addressed to Dog.

Miya: *reading aloud*

(Hey dogirl you sux! All you can drau is shity pokeman that dont even lok like what ther suposed to! Y dont you get a life!

~randomstranger401)

...Ouch.

Myshu: Hmm... A valid, if grammatically incorrect, point.

Miya: What, that Dog can't draw? That's not news.

Myshu: I was speaking of the "no life" part.

Meekachu: ...Mwahaha! I think it's time for a reply. *picks up a pencil and begins to write*

(Dear randomstranger401,

There's no one by the name of "dogirl" here, but I'll gladly respond to your maimed sentences.)

...Shall we go with the "list" again?

Myshu: Absolutely. Try this... *steals the pencil*

(1: "Sucking" is all relative. Kind of like insanity. The difference is that people who "sux" share common characteristics more obvious than symptoms for schizophrenia. The inability to spell "draw" is one example.)

Miya: Heheh, my turn! *snatches the pencil for herself*

(2: Show me what a "shity pokeman" looks like and I'll draw it right.)

Meekachu: Ha, we're on a roll. Now for the third... *takes back the pencil*

...

...Dang, I can't think of one. We need something witty.

Miya: *picks up writing utensil*

(3: Spriff you.)

(A quiet pause)

Myshu: ...How tact.

Meekachu: *scowls at Miya* You just ruined the effect.

Miya: *shrugs* Oh, who cares? Just sign Dog's name and send it off.

Doggirl: *barging back in* ...Hey, wait-a-second! I AM a staff member!!

Meekachu: Busted.

Miya: Everyone bolt! *heads for the door*

(Meekachu and Myshu swiftly follow)

Doggirl: Not so fast, pals...! *gives chase*

8-1-01:

Doggirl: *sigh* There's nothing to do... what a boring world.

White: *barges in the front door, panting* Phew...! *huff* Everyone, come quick! *puff*

Meekachu: Is it the UPS guy again? I thought he learned his lesson last time.

Doggirl: Ups... hehe.

Miya: Yeah, Dog really let him have it. Gave him a fourth hole in his pants and everything.

Myshu: Poor fool.

Miya: What's with dogs and guys in uniform, anyway?

Doggirl: *shrugs*

Miya: *smirks* You know, you SHOULD know the answer to that kind of thing, being a dog and all...

White: *flails out her arms, exasperated* It's not the UPS guy, already! Just come out here, quick! *leaves in a hurry*

Meekachu: Arg, fine. *gets off the sofa* I was just working on my "butt-groove" in the cushion there...

Myshu: Your butt's got enough grooves already, ya old fart.

Meekachu: *growls* What was that?!

Miya: Com'on, White's going berserk out there! We should see what's going on. *runs out*

(Everyone reluctantly follows. Upon reaching the outdoors, they discover a small army of short, green, ugly creatures, wandering around the front yard.)

Miya: Eww...! They're all green and yucky!

Doggirl: What the fark?!

White: They followed me here! I don't know what to do with them!

Meekachu: You led them HERE??

Doggirl: What ARE they??

Myshu: ...They look like imps.

Miya: Imps?

Doggirl: ...Really? *gets an idea* ...Hey! Quick, get some sticks!

Meekachu: Uh... why?

White: *picks up on the thought* Hey, great idea, Dog!

(White grabs a large stick and beats an imp over the head with it. It vanishes in a flash of pink, leaving a small pile of coins behind.)

Meekachu: Whoa, money! $_$

Miya: *looks confused* ...They leave behind money when they die?

Myshu: Yes, imps tend to do that, for some... inexplicable reason.

Doggirl: Coolio.

White: Yes! It worked! Woo-hoo!

Meekachu: *finds a broom and breaks the handle off* Well what're we waiting for?! Let's go get rich! *charges into the imp swarm, killing them left and right*

Miya: Yay! *does the same*

Doggirl: Yee-haw!

(A slaughter ensues, and everyone collects mounds of money)

Doggirl: *rolling in coins* Mwehehehe! I'm rich! I'm rich...!

*pop*

Doggirl: *wakes up* ...Huh? *looks around the quiet doghouse, confused*

...Rats. Just a dream. *goes back to sleep*

11-26-01:

Doggirl: Zzz... *snort* arf... zzz...

Meekachu: Zzz... mmm... *mumblegrumble* cheesepuffs...

White: Zzz... no... game over... zzz...

Myshu: *hanging off the ceiling fan* Zzz... mmm... oh Batman... but I don't have a license to drive the Batmobile... mmth... zzz...

Miya: Zzz... uh... *pop* ...uh? *sits up* ...Hey! *looks around, bewildered* Geez, what time is it?! *hits Meekachu*

Meekachu: Zzz... *pow* oaf! Ugh... what the he--

Miya: Meek, you can't seriously be sleeping right now! Look what time it is!

Meekachu: *drowsily glances at a ticking cat clock, which is freckled with suspicious teeth marks* Uhh... seven-thirty?

Miya: *folds her arms* Day or night?

Meekachu: Umm... night?

Miya: *disdainful frown* And the month?

Meekachu: Uh... *cracking a guess* ....Heptember?

Miya: Ugh! *rolls her eyes, and pummels White with a sofa cushion*

White: Zzz... *pow* ...Ahh! No! Don't turn it off! *snaps out of it* ...Huh?

Miya: Finally! White, do you know the date?

White: *looks blank for a moment* ...You woke me up for that!? *scowl* I was just about to beat Final Fantasy Tactics!
*bites her lip* ...Er, in my dream, that is.

Miya: In your dreams, is right...

White: *mildly offended* Hey--

Meekachu: --Isn't that a playstation game??

Miya: *gasp* You dare defile our Nintendo fansite with a Playstation game?!

*shocked silence*

White: *looks bashful* ...um ...well ...Shut up!

Myshu: Zzz... *wakes up from the yelling* Ahh... ahh! *falls off the fan* Son-of-a-bi--! *lands on Dog with a crash*

Doggirl: Zzz... *pow* YIP!

Myshu: *sits up, highly aggravated, and realizes what she fell on* ...I said SON of a--

White: Geez Myshu! My poor dog! *pets Doggirl* Are you okay?

Doggirl: *in a daze* Oh yeah... sure... just a concussion. The internal bleeding will stop in a few days. *whimper* ...Please stop patting my head now.

White: Oh, right. *looks around to change the subject* Oh wow, does anyone know what time it is?

Miya: *throws up her arms in exasperation* That's what I want to know!

Meekachu: *gets off the sofa* Arg... *yawn* hibernatin' time's over. *checks a calender* Holy spriffin' pineapples! I just missed Thanksgiving! So close, too! Now I'll never find out if my football team won...

Myshu: Bah. Human holiday.

Miya: IT'S NOVEMBER?!

Doggirl: *growling at Myshu* Would you get offa me already!?

Myshu: But your fur's so plush.

White: *pulls Dog out from under the neiphiti* Oh, there ya go. Dog, I think that was officially the longest "moment of silence" in history!

Myshu: Wasn't too "silent" from Meekachu's snoring.

Meekachu: *looks indignant* I do not snore.

Miya: Point is, people... *looks at Dog, and rephrases* ...and mutt... *looks at Myshu* ...and "it"...

Myshu: Hrmph.

Miya: ...We've been off in snooze land for months now! Don't you think it MIGHT be time to update a little?

Doggirl: *whine* Oh, but... but... *scrounges for an excuse* Uh... White hasn't beat Tactics yet!

Myshu: *incredulous grimace* Final Fantasy Tactics? Isn't that a playstation game?

*everyone looks at White*

White: *furious blush* ...I know already, okay?!

1-21-02:

(television: It slices, it dices, it--!)

*click*

(television: Oh, Romeo--)

*click*

(television: Crikey! That's one huge croco--)

*click*

(television: There ain't enough room in this town for the both--)

Miya: --For pineapple's sake, just pick a channel and sit with it, already.

Meekachu: Quiet, you. Channel-surfing takes the upmost concentration. *click*

(television: Okay kids, it's time for another song! Hyuk--!)

Doggirl: O.O

White: Ahh, change it!!

Meekachu: Arg! *click*

(television: And tonight's winning numbers are--)

Meekachu: This remote must be broken. It's only tuning in to the "suck" station. *click*

White: Maybe it doesn't like you.

(television: Burn in Hell!!)

Myshu: I'll say.

Miya: *sighs, and slumps into the sofa* Gawd, we need lives...

Meekachu: Well it wasn't MY idea to burn the t.v guide!

Myshu: No one would bring in firewood.

Doggirl: *scratch*

Miya: No, that's not what I meant! I mean... look at us! Wasting away on the couch, watching t.v... We should get out more! Do something once in a while! You know, in other parts of the universe--

*click*

--there are people who don't even have HOMES, much less a tele-box, or phones, or a webpage, and I think--

*clickclick*

--we should be grateful--

*clickclickclick*

--we're not in some slummy... Meek the mute button won't work on me.

Meekachu: Damn.

Doggirl: *scratchscratch*

White: Cut that out, Dog. You'll scratch yourself furless.

Doggirl: *scratch* I-I *scratch* can't *scratch* h-h-help it. *scratch* Man, I've got some monster flea! *scratchscratchscratch*

(rat pops out of her fur)

Doggirl: o.o!

White: Holy--! *jumps up*

Miya: That's either the furriest flea I've ever seen, or Dog has a serious problem!

(rat scurries towards the door)

Meekachu: *not moving his tail* (in monotone) Someone get it, quick. Um, yeah.

White: Sick it, Dog! *points at the rodent*

Doggirl: *bites her finger*

White: AHH!! THE RAT, THE RAT, YOU DUMBASS! NOT MY... OWW!!

Myshu: *cracks up* Hahaha!

White: *flails her arm wildly, and stumbles backwards onto the t.v*

Meekachu: Crap, watch where you're--!

(television: *jolt* *fuzz* H-h-h-hey kids! I-love-you, you-love-me, we're-a-happ-y...)

Doggirl: o.o

Miya: 0.0

Meekachu: O.O

rat: >^oo^<

all: AHHHHH!!!!

Myshu: ...Now that's entertainment.

3-24-02:

(television: To be, or not to be...)

Miya: That's so bogus.

Meekachu: He was!

White: Really?

Miya: No! Of course not!

Meekachu: How can you prove he wasn't?

Miya: How can you prove he was?

Meekachu: It's obvious. Just look at that! Dancing, poetry, men in tights... not to mention all the phallic symbolism with those swords.

Myshu: Hooray for Freud.

Miya: You don't know what you're talking about. Shakespeare was not gay!

Meekachu: Yes he was!

Miya: So you're saying that just because he was sensitive to the fine arts that he's a--

Meekachu: --Exactly! I mean, he's obviously got private issues.

White: *starts snickering*

Miya: Meek!

Meekachu: Er, I mean... Well, hey, that sentence works both ways.

*scurry*scurry*scuttle*skid*

*thud*

White: Dog? Not again...

Myshu: Caution: rat at large.

Miya: Dog, just give it up, already! You should leave it to a trained professional.

Meekachu: Or a cat.

Doggirl: *staggers out of the closet* No way! I can get it, really! I'm a lean, mean, hunting machine!

rat: *scurry*scurry*

Doggirl: Oh, oh, mine! *chases rat around the walls*

*scurry*scuttle*

Doggirl: *turns a corner, and careens into the wall*

*skid*crash*thud*

Miya: *sigh* Pointless...

Doggirl: *from the floor* Um... lost it...

Myshu: The rat, or your mind?

White: Don't be so harsh, guys. At least she's trying to solve your pest problem. Dog, I think it went under the t.v.

Doggirl: *sticks her snout beneath the television set* Hey! I can see it. I think. Or that's a pretty big... ahh... dust-bunny... ahh...!

(She sneezes, and a cloud of dust explodes out from under the t.v, along with a flying furry ball.)

White: Ahh! *ducks out of the way*

rat: *bounces onto the sofa, next to Miya*

Miya: Eep-! *jumps up*

rat: *crawls under Meekachu's tail*

Meekachu: Whoa! *tries to get up* There's a rat in my crot--

Doggirl: *dives for the sofa* I gots it!

*chomp*

(Miles away, the pristine quiet is broken by a horrible scream.)

AHHHHHHH!!!

4-1-02:

(The gang enjoy a leisurely walk through the woods.)

Miya: Ah, the birds, the trees, the fresh air... don't you just love the outdoors?

Meekachu: The nature channel can do the same without making you stink like Pine-o-Pine.

White: Aw, give it a shot, Meek. You need a little sunlight, anyway. It's good for your skin, you know.

Meekachu: Oh look who's talking, miss WHITE yoshi.

White: *indignant* It's my natural skin color, you jacka--

Miya: --Speaking of getting a tan, it wouldn't kill you either, Myshu.

Myshu: *squinting through the bright light* Evil sun...

Doggirl: I don't see what the big deal is anyway, Miya. This isn't even a real forest. It's a city park.

Meekachu: Yeah. About twelve paces to the left, modern society trudges on without us.

Myshu: They're better off that way.

White: I hope there's a restroom up ahead. I need to go.

Doggirl: Why wait? There's plenty of trees. *points a paw* Look, there's one. Go there.

White: *appalled* A TREE?

Myshu: How sanitary.

Miya: *disgusted* Unlike you, mutt-face, most civilized creatures have a thing called dignity.

Doggirl: *pouts* I have dignity...

Myshu: You use grass for toilet paper.

Meekachu: *points* There's a rest stop around the corner, there.

White: *phew* Oh, good! Miya, will you please join me?

Miya: Sure.

(The two yoshies stroll away)

Myshu: ...

*walks off in the opposite direction*

Meekachu: ...Hey, now! Where do you think you're going?

Myshu: Goodbye, losers. *leaves*

Doggirl: ...

Wow. She left just like that.

Meekachu: Hrmph. It's not fair. You let her do whatever she wants, Dog.

Doggirl: Would YOU like to try and stop her?

Meekachu: ...Nevermind.

*looks back towards the restrooms* Hmm... This makes sense. Why do girls always need to go to the bathroom in pairs? Do they need help, or something? Are there little holes in the wall between each stall where they put their hands through to help each other wipe?

Doggirl: You're asking me? I've been banned from public restrooms ever since I took a nap in a urinal and bit that guy in the crotch.

Meekachu: You what?

Doggirl: *defensive* I thought it was a fancy water fountain!

Meekachu: I don't want to know...

Doggirl: ...I sure was surprised when that guy unzipped his pants...

*spots a fire hydrant* Ooo! Excuse me. *trots off*

Meekachu: ...Dogs are disgusting.