Chapter 5
“BBEEEEEEPPPPPPPP!!!!!!” A loud noise came from Bri’s room. Suddenly, doctors and nurses ran into Brian’s room, pulling at the tubes and wires that engulfed his body. Nick came out and stood with AJ and I as we watched through the window, then they closed the blinds. About 5 minutes later, Dr. Simmons walked out. “I’m sorry.” was all he had to say. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” I yelled and fell to the floor. Nick caught me because AJ couldn’t. After that, I’ve blocked most of it out.
...THE NEXT DAY AT MY APARTMENT...
AJ and Nick stayed over with me (AJ was released that night). AJ was flipping through the TV channels and stopped on MTV.
This is an MTV news flash. I’m John Norris. I have some sad news for music lovers around the world. Last night Brian Littrell and AJ McLean of the Backstreet Boys were struck head-on by a suspected drunk driver. The driver of the other car was killed instantly while AJ was released that same night with no major injuries. Brian, however, suffered from massive internal bleeding amongst other injuries. We are sorry to say Brian did not make it.
John was starting to sound a little choked up....
Brian Thomas Littrell, known as B-Rok to millions, and legendary member of the Backstreet Boys, died at age 25 last night in his hometown of Orlando, Florida..
AJ quickly turned off the TV as I walked into the room. “It’s all over the news channels and MTV.” AJ said softly. “I know.” I replied even softer.
...A WEEK LATER IN LEXINGTON @ THE FUNERAL...
Brian’s mother had asked me to say a few words at the funeral. I told her I’d rather sing because he always loved listening to me sing. So I got together Brian’s and my old high school chorus and asked if they’d sing a song with me and they agreed. “At this time Brian’s best friend, Madison, is going to sing a song with the help of a few friends.” Our old youth minister stated. Out came our old choir as I headed up to the front of the church. As I turned around to face the crowd I noticed AJ, Kevin, Nick, and Howie had followed me up. AJ grabbed my hand and said “We’re here for you Maddy.” “Thank you.” I replied. Soft music floated through the church as Maddy began to sing
I won’t see your smile and I won’t hear you laugh anymore everynight...I won’t see you walk through that door cause time wasn’t on your side...it isn’t right...I can’t say I love you...it’s too late to tell you but I really need you to know....No, I’ll never forget you...I’ll never let you out of my heart...Oh You will always be here with me... ...Oh I’ll hold on to the memories Baby...Baby can you hear me where ever you may be tonight...are you near me....I need you to be by my side cause I never said good bye...it isn’t right I should have said I love you...why didn’t I just tell you God knows I need you to know...No, I’ll never forget you I’ll never let you out of my heart...Oh You will always be here with me...Oh I’ll hold on to the memories Baby...Somewhere I know you’ll be with me someday in another time...but right now you’re gone....you just vanished away....but I’ll never leave you behind....No, I’ll never forget you...I’ll never let you out of my heart...Oh You will always be here with me....Oh I’ll hold on to the memories Baby
When we finished singing, I don’t think there was a dry eye in the church except mine. I hadn’t cried throughout the whole funeral procession, I don’t understand why I didn’t. That night, AJ had offered to stay at my house (in Lexington) with me to help me through this thing. I still never cried. I guess I just couldn’t come to terms with the whole thing. A week later, AJ came into my room as I was staring off into space. I had been doing that a lot lately. “Look Maddy, we need to talk.” he spoke softly. “Okay” I said. “Everysince that night at the hospital you haven’t been the same...”
“I know that AJ, I just lost my best friend, the one guy I loved more than anything in the world. How the hell do you expect me to be the same?” I scolded him harshly. “I don’t expect you to” AJ yelled then softened his tone to say “let me finish. All I was going to say is that you don’t cry anymore. You haven’t since that day. It’s okay to cry.” AJ said softly. “I’m sorry, it’s just that I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I guess I just can’t accept that he’s gone until we say goodbye.” Maddy answered, her head bowed down. “I understand, but you have to say it soon because it’s killing me and the guys to see you this way. And you know Brian hates watching you from above acting like this.” After a long pause AJ started again “I got something for you and there is one to go on B’s grave too.”
He went out into the hall and brought in a rather large picture frame. Inside was an 8 x 10 picture and another 8 x 10 paper with writing on it. The picture was the same one that sat on Brian’s nightstand. The one that was of me and Brian when we were three. On the paper, it look like a poem. “Our favorite picture.” I said softly and began to read the poem: A Letter To A Friend. “AJ where did you get this poem?” I said starting to get angry. “I found it on your desk the other day. I’m sorry I took it but...” “Get out.” I said coldly. “The one for Brian’s grave is in the garage, you need to say goodbye so he can rest peacefully.” “AJ GET OUT!!!!” I yelled.
