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Gabriel's Story




On August 22nd, 2000, Jeff and I found out I was pregnant. It was a big surprise, and once the shock wore off, we were very excited! This was our first child and he/she was due April 11th, 2001. On December 1st, we finally had our routine ultra sound. We couldn't wait to find out if it was a boy or a girl.

That day ended up being the worst day of our lives. The technician and the doctor took a very long time. They were talking to each other quietly and I began to get very very scared. Finally they were finished. Then, the doctor told us that there were some problems. He proceeded to tell us that the baby had something called anencephaly, and that it was "incompatible with life." Our world stopped.

I was amazingly calm while I asked questions. What do we do next? They sent us home with a book entitled A Time to Decide, A Time to Heal. We had all weekend to read, to think about our choices, and to cry. We had three options to pick from. We could carry the baby to term, knowing he could die in my womb, or at the very least a few hours after he was born. Our second choice was to have a D&C, a form of abortion, and the baby would not come out whole. Our final choice was to induce labor, say our goodbyes in person and try to make as many memories as possible. We chose the third alternative, knowing that for us it was the right choice, though it may not be for others.

We went to the hospital on the 5th of December at 9:00 am and began to induce. Gabriel Thomas was born still at 7:07 am on the 6th of December. He was a Wednesday's child, full of woe. I was only at 22 weeks gestation, two weeks past the half way mark. He weighed 4 1/2 ounces and was 6 inches long. He had the most beautiful hands, with long slender fingers. Everybody said he had my mouth and Jeff's nose. Jeff thought he had my tiny ears. His limbs were remarkably long considering how tiny he was.

We spent lots of time with him, (as if you could really call mere hours "lot's of time") and had many supportive friends and family there to say their goodbyes and to comfort Jeff and I. I am very grateful to them all. The staff at Fairview were wonderful also, especially my midwife. We took many pictures and had a memorial for him the following Saturday. He was cremated and we have his ashes in a beautiful angel urn.

The next step was waiting for the test results to see if this was a fluke thing or if it was chromosomal. January 19th, when I went in for my 6th week post pregnancy check up, I learned that it was chromosomal. In fact he had Trisomy 18 meaning that he had an extra chromosome 18. Our next question was, "What does that mean? Is it more likely to happen again?" The following Monday, after another long weekend we met with the genetic counselor. That day, we were relieved to find out that Trisomy 18 was just a fluke thing that happend. Our chances of having another baby with it are only 1%. It wasn't my fault, it wasn't something I did or didn't do. It is nice to know that Jeff and I can have healthy babies still.

No one could possibly replace our Gabriel and I will never stop longing for him. Jeff and I are got married on Gabriel's due date, April 11th, 2001. We dedicated that day to our angel. We love and miss him so very much and we can't wait to see him again at the end of the rainbow...



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It is now January of 2004 as I add on to our story. We waited for two long years to try to have to have another baby. We bought a house, I finished school, and we got established in our jobs.

It took nearly a year for me to get pregnant again, but finally, in December of 2003 our Christmas wish came true, I took a test on December 23rd and it was positive. Everybody was so happy for us, our family and friends, and co-workers. I was due August 22, 2004, ironically the day we found out that we were pregnant with Gabriel. On January 2nd, I was due to get my pregnancy confirmed. I started to bleed that day, and it continued though the weekend, finally after yet another long weekend on Sunday, January 4th, 2004 I lost the baby. We will keep trying though, and in the mean time, we have another teeny tiny angel to love and miss until we meet again...



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It is now June of 2005 as I add on once again. This time we have a very happy ending. They all said "Third time's a charm" and they were right.

After the miscarriage, the midwife said we could try again right away and we did. I got pregnant right away this time. After a long and sometimes very difficult pregnancy our little Alina was born. She was very healthy, 9lbs and 9 oz and she was 22 inches long.

As I write this she is just about 8 months old and as sweet as can be. We are so very happy to have her and are delighted each day as she grows and learns and make us laugh. Though I miss Gabriel terribly and wonder about the baby I didn't get much time with, I know that someday we will meet again and when Alina gets bigger we will tell her about her big brother in Heaven and send balloons up to him on special days. She is very loved by her whole family and many friends and it gives me peace to know that she has angel out there watching over her...

I hope that my happy ending gives others hope like we have now. We want to have more children someday and so our story will continue on eventually.



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