On Vanity and Shame
In this article we will try to understand, among other things, what is actually vanity, why vanity is seen so much as a flaw rather than as a virtue or a quality, what different kinds of vanity are there and may stand out, and why are some people more vain than others. Let's start with the meanings of that word. Vanity stands for pride and conceit. Besides the etymology of the word vanity is somehow related with its root 'vain'in the sense of empty, frivolous, foolish; On the other hand, vain people are said to be inflated,puffed up, swollen. Does this sound like a contradiction? Well, many people claim that if one praise oneself or shows up, it is a sign that one has not indeed any good reason or credit for that matter. Along with this theory,such people are just in need to fullfill a void, pretending to be what they aren't or assuming what they are far from attaining. This argument seems a little beside the point as we would be assuming that people claim things because they need to fulfil a void rather than simply because they are proud of something and are glad to tell others about it. To be egocentric, concerned with appearances, image, and evaluation is seen as evil. But who are us? Actually, what we call self is just the sense of unity produced by a continuity of thoughts. Along within the stream of thougts there is this pattern of unity, a sense of self, and that is what we call self-awareness. But actually we are not one, we are many selfs. Sometimes this selfs are even contradictory causing all sorts of conflicts. If one is identified with some personality that is what one project to others, there is no distinction between what one is and what one project to others. Now, what one appears to be to others is a different matter. That deppends on how the other sees one. If one is not what one appears to be than one has a false appearance. But is very difficult to know how one appears to be. For that matter we just have our own image or idea of what we appear to be, and it may rely mostly on our own imaginations and projections. Thus it is very difficult to delineate the distinction between what we are and what we appear to be to others.
One can be vain in many regards such as: in fashion, in speech eloquence, in well-looking, in mercy, in work, in sports, in game, in doing politics and in having an open-mind. One can be even vain in their effort to seem humble or careless. Also it is very difficult to draw distinctions between vanity and pride, arrogance and conceit, and their relations with egocentrism, self-importance or with selfishness. This things sometimes are related sometimes not. We have avoided in this article to go in much detail making such disticntions and decided for a general approach on the subject.
But the question remains the same: why are people taught and programmed - in virtually all cultures and religions - to be humble, modest and unpretentious? As we said above we are told that being modest one stands for what one really is and is not catched by the flaw of pretending to be fulfiled when in fact there is a void to carry out.
Here we propose a different and perhaps controversial approach on the reason why vanity is seen so much as a flaw: culture and religion does not instigate other people to show up and be vain because it can be an intimidating thing and cause inferiority to others who like to be in a domineering position. This sense of inferiority is not vanity itself, it is quite the opposite: a sense of lacking, of impotence, of self-pity. And somehow it does not bring along envy and jealousy because vain attitudes are seen themselves as negligible and undesirable. The repression against vanity is a kind of brainwashing to control and manipulate masses. As long as people are humble and modest they can be easly subjugated and repressed. This does not stand only for vanity affairs and denials but, in general, all kinds of shame and shyness may be inflicted by culture, religion and morality. It is a tremendous momentum that comes from generation to generation, and that probably at some time became a biological and neurological condition of humankind. It's a longtime heritage that is beeing perpetuated more and more by culture, social agreements, education, status and compromise.
Some people, either unconsciously or because they understand the trickiness of the business, just refuse to be humble and modest. They don't care whether they are what they appear to be or not. Albeit it is difficult to mention someone being vain without it sounding pejorative actually it is difficult to find someone vain which has not somehow a lot of self-esteam, self-reliance and self-confidence. That is, whether one like it or not, vain people seem to be at one time quite pleased and glad with themselves. On the other hand they may be to much susceptible to other people opinions and regards but that isn't necessarily bad. After all, this article pretends to be an apology of vanity, so that people become less biased on it, making false assumptions on its aspects or concerning people that for some reason pride themselves on. Sure there are many other things to say on this subject, so you are more than welcome to send any suggestions or comentaries on this article.
